Partial nudity seems to be a standard aspect of each episode these days. This week's show begins with Luke in the shower. He reaches for a bottle of Dove shampoo. The shower looks makeshift, with a hose and a handle rather than an actual showerhead. He starts to scrub his hair, and the water cuts out. Aw, they're so poor. Yawn. Luke yells, "Mom?" Maybe he'll be naked in every show. Meow.
Luke's got his bathrobe on in the shot as he comes into the kitchen. I guess there were no basketballs handy. The robe has nothing on b-ball couture. "Did you forget to pay the water bill?" Karen replies, "Of course I didn't forget to pay the water bill." She gets up and checks the water in the kitchen tap, which sputters and then stops. She turns back to Luke and says, "This is why we need the emergency Visa. Something must have broke. I'll take care of it." Luke stands there with soap in his hair, looking like a wet baby duck. Aw. I might knock a lot of this show, but CMM is damn hot. Ahem. Right. She says, "Come on, let's get you rinsed off." Luke bends his head over the sink, and Karen uses water from a jug that just happens to be on the counter to pour over her son's head. Karen starts to giggle as she pours cold water all over him. Luke says, "Okay, how is this funny, Mom?" Karen replies, "How is this not funny?" See, things break in Luke's world; they break all the time. And I can't believe that we're about three minutes in and we've already had two very subtle bits of product placement. Maybe the WB is working hard to keep this show on the air.
All the way on the other side of town -- you know, where the running water actually works -- Nathan and Dadzilla come home to find Deb there. "Check it out," she says, "it's called dinner." Both Nathan and Dadzilla seem surprised to see her. Dan says smoothly, "Who is that lady, is that my wife? I didn't think you were getting back until Monday." Apparently, Deb sweet-talked some company called Ziodex into doubling their donation to AIDS research. She wraps her arms around Dadzilla's neck. I'm afraid he's going to lash out and bite her, but he kisses her kind of sweetly instead. Dadzilla asks if she's sure she doesn't want to quit saving the world and sell cars instead. Because it is such a rewarding career and has made him oh so happy. Yeah, whatever, Dadzilla. Deb gives Nathan a hug, and then asks her son how he's doing. Nathan replies that he's late for warm-ups. I guess there's a basketball game tonight. She wants Nathan to stay for dinner, but he begs off, basketball's more important than his mom, come on, he's a teenage boy. Dan's across the kitchen with a bunch of strings in his hand. He tugs them slowly. Nathan's head turns. Dan: "Remember what I told you. He can't shoot if he doesn't have the ball." Slowly, carefully, Nathan's head bobs: "Yes, Master, I understand." Or he just nods. Okay, I realize that there's mutual animosity between the two brothers, but how does it make either situation better if the team starts losing?
Whitey's got the team on the sidelines. In the background, the cheerleaders are screaming, "K-I-L-L, kill, kill, kill." They are echoing our sentiments about Dadzilla. Anyway, Woda's not too happy. "Dammit! This is a team, not a Chinese fire drill." Don't quite understand that reference, but hey, it sounds derogatory enough to work. Where would sports be if coaches didn't insult players with socially unacceptable jabs? ["Where I come from, a Chinese fire drill is when you stop your car at a light and everyone including the driver has to pile out, run a lap around the car, and pile back in before it turns green. And that concludes today's installment of 'Kids In Jersey Get Really Bored Sometimes.'" -- Sars] He turns to Nathan: "Scott, you're playing selfish. Get out there and pretend you know each other." The boys drink Gatorade. Nathan and Lucas give each other the evil eye. Three cheers, and then it's back on the court for the team. I guess it's not the Ravenettes yelling, because Brooke turns to Peyton and asks if she can catch a ride to Nathan's after-party. Peyton quips, "I didn't think you were going. Figured you be hiding out in Lucas's backseat again." Brooke: "Jealous." Peyton: "No." Brooke: "What, I can see it. You're both so broody, you can brood together." Peyton raises her eyebrow. Brooke smirks. Shut up, Peyton's eyebrow. I've never seen someone use her eyebrow so much in place of emotion before. Oh, and Brooke rocks. These two are cheerleaders who never seem to cheer. TPTB could at least get them to throw a kick in our direction every once in a while. Or at the very least, some spirit fingers.
Back in the game, Nathan desperately tries to get Tim to pass him the ball, but the other team has him blocked in. The virtual commentator who magically shows up in the ether during the game tells me that Tim's trying to get the ball to Nathan but, whoa, oh, wow, Smith passes to Luke, who scores a jump-shot. Karen smiles in the stands. Dadzilla broods better than anyone on the show. He's pissed that Luke scored the basket instead of Nathan. Holy crap. The team wins the freaking game -- shouldn't that be the point, Dadzilla? The narrator says, "Lucas Scott is really starting to gel with this team!" Nathan bitches Tim out. Tim takes it like the bitch-whipped boy he is.
Blah Tim whines, blah Nathan gives him the cold shoulder, blah Tim grovels, blah Nathan acts like an ass. What's up -- why is Tim the only kid with a heavy accent? And why is it that we always have to pretend not to notice that kind of stuff?
Karen stands with Lucas. Deb hovers in the background, watching them. She looks very well put-together, like a Booster mother. Karen asks her son, "So, are you excited?" Luke: "Why, because we won?" Karen: "No, because there's running water in the locker room. We're going to be roughing it until tomorrow." See, Karen's got a great attitude. Luke laughs. Nathan walks over to his parents. He says, "What's up, Dad?" Dadzilla looks him up and down, sort of half shakes his head, bites his lip a bit, and then walks away. Without saying a word. Not even a grunt. How is that anyway to treat your son? Honestly? Why wouldn't the son grow up to be an asshole if his father treats him like this? Anyway. Deb smiles and says, "Nice game, sweetie." Nathan snits, "Try telling that to Dad." You can hear Karen out of the shot saying, "I'll see you later." Nathan walks up to Luke and says, "Two decent games in a row, man, you getting better or is it just luck?" Luke just stares at him. "Team's going to party tonight at my parents' beach house." Luke squints: "Why are you telling me that?" Nathan snaps, "Because I said 'the team,' right." Luke squints some more. Nathan continues, "Look, it's going to be a long season, all right, might as well deal with it." And then he walks away. Luke squints after him.
Credits. Blah trying to be all that they want to be lately, blah, something else, blah stupid lyrics blah.
Luke and Haley have Keith's tow truck. I honestly can't imagine how driving that monster around is remotely economical. Haley's got a cute little green hat. She says, "The guys kidnapped you, trashed your court, threatened you with bodily harm -- party, yeah, sure, why not." Please note, that sarcasm was intended. Luke tosses a casual hand over the top of the wheel. "Okay, listen, I know it's all a set-up, all right, but I'm not going to let him screw with me, whatever he dishes out he's going to get back double." I guess even the idea of the high road has been absolutely abandoned. Where's Jake? Shouldn't he be magically appearing with his magical pixie-dust-inspired sensible advice right about now? Haley broaches the subject very demurely when she says, "Do you think maybe" -- and she looks down -- "maybe he's had a change of heart?" Luke stares straight ahead: "That requires a heart." Um, not -- it actually requires heartstrings, which I'm sure Dadzilla forgot to install when he built Nathan in his own image.
Peyton and Brooke roar toward the beach house. She screeches to a stop, and Brooke rocks around in the passenger seat. Peyton smiles as she put the car in park. Brooke complains, "Every time I ride with you I swear I'm never going to do it again." The beach house looks lovely. It's all white and lit up with tiny white lights. There are kids all over the place. Seems the party's really hopping. Sheesh, I think I just showed my age there, sorry: the party's banging. Is that a better word choice? They get out of the car. Brooke says, "Keys?" Peyton says something about tempting fate. You know that's the first sign that something's going to happen; it's pretty much the definition of a contrived situation. Any. Way. Tim comes running up to Peyton. He whines, "You've got to talk to him. Lucas had the better shot. You saw it, right." Brooke tells him he's being pathetic. All three kids stare at the gigantic truck as it arrives. Tim drawls, "What's he doing here?" Nathan saunters up. "I invited him. I mean, 'cause you guys are such good friends now." And the knife turns in poor Tim's back. Peyton asks, "What are you trying to pull?" Nathan says smoothly, "Nothing." As Luke walks past him, Nathan greets him: "I wasn't sure you'd come." Luke snits, "That makes two of us." Haley tries to walk by, but Nathan stands in her way. He holds out his hand, making a point to introduce himself like they've never met. Haley seems very uncomfortable about the entire situation. Everyone walks up the stairs and into the beach house.
Luke and Haley look around. Luke's eyes open in wonder. Haley whistles. "Well, I'll bet their plumbing works." The house is beautiful. A girl I've never seen before comes into the room holding a copy of Thud, which is an alternative newspaper, sort of akin to the city weeklies that tell you about bands that are playing. Theresa says, "Have you guys seen this?" She holds it out to Brooke, who picks it up. "High School Fear Leader? It's a comic strip?" Brooke holds the paper out: "Wait, this is insulting, right?" Some guy says that his dog could draw better than the artist. Brooke sees one of the panels: "Really, what guy keeps his hat on during sex?" The camera cuts to Nathan. Heh. "Who is this Sake person anyway?" Nathan snits, "Yeah. I wonder." He looks at Peyton, who says, "Who cares, it's just a stupid comic strip." Brooke continues to bitch: "More like sucky. Whoever it is doesn't know the first thing about it. They make it seem so --" Luke stands just behind Peyton. He cuts in, "Shallow?" Brooke and Tim give him a dirty look. Peyton rolls her eyes: "Where's the keg?" It's kind of early in the morning for me to be drinking, but I sure wish I had a keg in my living room right about now. How come parties on television always seem so lame? And do Nathan's parents just let him use the beach house whenever he wants? Does this kid have no rules?
Back at Dan's Puppet Paradise, the master manipulator walks by Nathan's room and finds his wife there. He asks if she's okay. Deb turns around and says, "He used to ask me before he put stuff up, now I don't even know what he's interested in, besides basketball." Dan smiles. "Basketball." Deb sits down on the bed. "He talks to you, Dan. How's he been doing?" Dan joins her on the bed. "He's holding up since Whitey moved him out of his position, but that's probably temporary." Deb chides her husband: "I asked you how he is, not how he's playing." Pause. "It must be confusing for him, with Lucas on the team now. Are we going to talk about that?" How did Dadzilla end up with such a sympathetic wife? And just when you think Dan's almost human, he replies, "I think that's probably temporary too." Deb: "You think or you wish?" She takes a deep breath: "I saw Karen at the game tonight. But then, I've never really spoken to her." Dan says he knows it must be hard on her, but Deb cuts in, "No, not really. I think it's harder for you and Nathan." She kind of, sort of looks a bit like Nathan; she's got dark eyes, but her dyed blonde hair doesn't really suit her -- although it does make her look more like a mom. It's strange; both Dan and Deb look a lot older then Karen. I guess being a single mom really keeps you looking young. It's all that worrying about money and survival and stuff. Or not.
Haley and Lucas walk aimlessly around the party. She says, "So, I know you're having the, like, time of your life, but can we please make like a tree and get out of here." He clomps along beside her and hides his hands in his shirtsleeves. Blah they just got there, blah wants to prove a point, blah let her know when that happens blah. I hate parties like that, where you just feel so uncomfortable and you really want to go, but the person you came with just refuses to leave. I went through many like that in university. The worst was one where I just sat on the arm of a couch for an hour and no one talked to me -- no one, no one even said hello. It was awful. In hindsight, I should have just left. Any. Way. Haley goes to the bathroom. Someone walks by Luke and says, "Hey, good game, man!" See, at least some people are talking to you, Luke; that's the first step to acceptance.
He makes his way back into the kitchen. Brooke calls out to him, "Hey, Lucas, come play." What's the game? "I Never." Some Joe Jock Guy says, "Well, apparently you have!" He sticks his tongue out like that's a scorching hot burn -- oh, calling Brooke a slut, so inventive. She tells him to shut up. Yeah, shut up. Nathan hands Luke a beer. And then he explains the game. This show is just turning into a walk down memory lane for me. I also played this game once in university, with the same friend who made me go to that awful party, her roommates, and a couple of her neighbours from door. No word of a lie, but I think the two of us drank once, maybe twice, while her roommates were up to Brooke's level. I'm not painting a very successful picture of myself here, am I? Both my friend and I were stunned, not only because we couldn't come up with any decent things to say "I never" about, but also because, well, we never took a drink. Luke takes the cup, tells Nathan he knows the game, and sips his beer. The girls are all wearing camisole-type shirts. Theresa begins, "Let's see. I've never had sex with anything made out of plastic." Brooke drinks. Heh. Then it's her turn. "Oops," she giggles, "I've done that." She looks at Lucas. Nathan's turn: "I've never had a dad that wished I was a stain on the sheets." Luke stands up straight and just looks at Nathan. No one laughs, but some people just sputter like they can't believe he just said something that cruel. Kudos to Luke; he simply walks around behind the group, comes up to Nathan, and whispers, "Well, you're welcome to mine." Then he walks away. Brooke and Peyton both look kind of concerned.
Peyton walks over to the bathroom and tries the door. Haley says from the inside, "Hang on a minute." Peyton steps aside, clutching her beer cup for dear life. This party actually seems kind of crappy. Haley comes out of the bathroom and apologizes. As she tries to sneak by, Peyton asks her how the tutoring is going. Haley tries to avoid the question, but Peyton says, "It's okay, he tells me everything." Haley replies, "Yeah, he said he needed some help." Peyton: "Maybe you can teach him to stop being such a jackass." Haley smiles, "I will put that on the lesson plan." The two girls bond over a glass of warm beer and a bathroom. Peyton warns Haley to be careful. If Nathan's such a jerk, someone to be so afraid of, someone who might take advantage of Haley, why in the world does Peyton stay with him? Haley nods, politely taking Peyton's advice. Only Peyton's not quite finished: "Does Lucas know you're helping Nathan?" Haley looks stupefied, then confused, then actually a bit concerned. Peyton: "You know, you say a lot when you keep your mouth shut." Haley stutters a bit. "Don't worry," Peyton continues, "I can keep mine shut too." Then she heads into the bathroom. Gosh, I hope there's toilet paper in there -- that's the worst thing about a house party, there's never any damn toilet paper.
Haley looks around the house. She comes across a table that displays beautifully framed pictures of the happy family. There are plenty of basketball trophies also on display. She picks up a picture when Lucas comes up and folds one down. That's the last thing he wants to see, I'm sure -- reminders of Dan's choice for a life that doesn't include him or Karen. Haley notices that Luke's really upset, and asks him what happened. "Same old crap. He thinks if he keeps hammering me, I'll quit the team." Haley rolls her eyes. "What did he do this time?" Luke replies, "He made some feeble comment." Luke sighs. "Feeble" is such a great word. Very underrated in terms of television scripts. A+ for word use. He says, "I'm not going to let it get to me." Haley states, "Yeah. Obviously that's working out for you." They smile. "Luke, have you guys actually ever talked?" He quips, "Yeah, and we trade emails too." She makes a good point, though: blah they're hyper-sensitive around each other, blah she understands, blah maybe they take everything the wrong way, blah defending Nathan blah. Luke walks purposefully toward her: "There was no misunderstanding what he said." He steps even closer: "And why are you defending him?" Yes. Why, Haley? Wouldn't now be the time to be honest, because you know this whole tutoring thing is just going to come back and bite you on your ass? Haley stutters, "Um, ah, I'm just trying to bring some perspective, it's a really screwed-up situation." She looks up at him. "I'm sure that having you around isn't any easier for him than it is for you." Blah they should talk blah. Damn. Luke must feel like he's getting it from every angle. "Tell me," he bitches, "I'm not hearing this." Haley looks at him: "Then what are you doing here, Lucas? Obviously, you're looking for something, right?" Luke states that he's not going to let Nathan win. Seems to me that Nathan's not winning much these days. His girlfriend's always pissed at him, his dad treats him like a pariah, he can't control the team like he wants, and his mouth is always getting him into trouble. Luke's the golden boy in this situation. Haley sighs. She turns around. Then she turns back again. "Fine. Don't let him win." She pauses. "I'm going to go home." Good for you, Haley. Except maybe not, because you're kind of betraying the best friend you've ever had. Luke calls after her, but she's got that green hat on; she's making like a tree and growing right on out of there.
Haley walks quickly through the house. Nathan sees her and asks, "Are you leaving?" Haley whisper-snits, "Nathan. We had a deal, you said you were going to be nice." Blah he's being nice, blah invited him, blah stinking party, blah he's a hero blah. Tim hovers in the background. He needs to feel the heat of Nathan from wherever he is or else he won't survive. Haley: "What did you say anyway?" Nathan makes it out like he was joking, that riding someone like he just did to Lucas is just a necessary part of the team's camaraderie. Blah lame joke, blah trying to include him blah. Haley: "Maybe you need to rethink your approach." Is Haley really this dumb? Can she not see through Nathan if she's so damn smart? Hell, even Peyton sees through him and she's a wooden post. He asks her how he should handle the situation. Haley seems to believe he's on the level: "It's easy." She whispers, "Stop being such a jerk." Actually, Haley's naiveté is kind of refreshing; not every teenager on the WB needs to be so damn worldly and irritatingly precocious. Haley moves further through the party.
Lucas heads outside to the porch where Peyton sits, looking rather drunk, on a swinging bench. She slurs, "He really slammed you." She's still hugging the beer cup. Luke says, "I don't care what he thinks." Then he broods off the edge of the porch, just to try to make us think he's actually telling the truth. The ocean sounds quite lovely in the background. Peyton mumbles, "Well, neither do I." Luke turns around to face her: "Oh, yeah. Then why are you drinking?" She looks at him and takes another sip of beer. Nathan watches from inside the house as Luke bends down in front of Peyton. He turns around, plotting his crucial step, but Tim interrupts his evil planning. "Nathan," he asks, "how come your parents don't have any decent porn?" No, this isn't a rhetorical question. I'm guessing that good porn is a staple of the Smith household. Whatever. I've never known any parents to have porn just lying around in the cupboard under the television in the living room. Anyway, Nathan's got a better idea, and he pulls out an old videotape. Tim drawls, "Whut is it?" Nathan smirks, "It's a comedy." On goes the TV, and in goes the tape.
Back to Luke and Peyton outside. He says, "So, I'm confused. You want to be anonymous, but you let the world watch you on a webcam." Hallelujah. Finally, someone brings up the absolute "paradox" at the centre of Peyton's character: she wants to be an artist, not a popular cheerleader. Yawn. She says, "The world isn't watching me, but I guess you are." Luke cocks his head back and smiles, "Okay, the point is, you want to express yourself, but you don't want people to know it's you." Okay, I just thought I'd take the time to tell you all that my name isn't really Ragdoll. Um, I'm not really hiding behind this pseudonym or anything. I'm just afraid of the world. I'm afraid to expose myself to the hurt that comes from making my art public. I'm scared to death that you all won't accept me for who I really am. Peyton and I are really two soul sisters making the same journey toward artistic acceptance. Zzzz. Peyton replies, "I guess I'm just a riddle, wrapped inside a mystery, in a bitch." Yeah, that comeback, it doesn't even really make that much sense. Damn, TPTB really need to work on their dialogue in certain places. They know where to find me if they need some help. I've got some pointers. Luke says, "Maybe you're just a tortured artist." Yeah, and I'm really Picasso reincarnated. Peyton: "Look, I don't need you defending me or my work. I don't need you analyzing or interpreting me either. In fact, I'm pretty sure I don't need you at all." For some reason, her cold shoulder doesn't faze him; he sure is cocky for someone who seems to be a sort of unpopular, nerdy loner. He says, "Pretty sure?"
But before they can further explore their obvious connection (double yawn), Luke hears the television. Surprisingly, it's another narrator -- this time, it's some sort of high school newsmagazine reporter. She's talking to the Tree Hill High Snowball Dance King and Queen, Dan Scott and Karen Rowe. The silly girl asks, "Karen, what's the secret to your success?" Good grief, you can't make this stuff up it's so embarrassing. The fake Karen and Dan look about as real as the young Lorelai and Christopher from that truly horrible episode of Gilmore Girls. It's Moira's voice, but it's definitely not her on the tape. She says, "The secret to our success, hum, I don't know; good question, Dan?" In true Scott fashion, fake Dadzilla says, "Good sex!" And there goes the apple, see, it really doesn't fall far from the tree. Brooke exclaims, "Ew! The hair!" The silly fake news reporter asks, "Karen, do you think you guys will get married?" For heaven's sake, it's the mid-'80s; you can't tell me that thinking hadn't advanced past marrying your high school boyfriend and living happily ever after. She's not that much older than I am. Karen's voice floats into the room: "He really is the sweetest guy in the whole world. So, I'm thinking yes. Come and see us in ten years and I'll bet you meet the kids and get a tour of our big house and see how happy we are!" Tim asks, "So, who's the girl?" Luke looks like his heart just broke into a million pieces. He says quietly, "That's my mom." Nathan snits, "At least their dreams came true for one of them." Luke retorts, "Except for the happy part, right?" Nathan laughs. Luke walks up and pushes him back into the wall. Again, Nathan laughs; in fact, so does Tim, and well, a lot of other people at the party laugh too, except Peyton and Brooke. They both actually seem horrified that Nathan could actually be that cruel. But you know, if Dadzilla's had this tape kicking around for the last sixteen or so years, he must have some feelings for Karen. He doesn't seem like the kind of man who would just leave this tape lying around so he can pop it in for fond memories -- it has to be there for a reason. I guess Luke never realized that his mother and father actually had a good relationship before he came along, and Nathan just made him feel like he's the reason why his mother never had her happy ending. Man, I can't imagine how bad that would make a kid feel. I really can't.
Haley sits out on the dock. Nathan saunters up: "I thought you left." She explains how she's waiting for a "stupid cab." The charm switch in Nathan's head flicks to "on." If Dan's taught him anything, it's how to manipulate girls. He says, "I wanted to thank you for holding back." Haley: "What do you mean?" Nathan: "'Jerk' was pretty tame, you could have called me a lot worse." Yeah, like "jerk-off" or "jerkface." Or, well, you get the picture. Blah he deserved it blah. Haley tells him that she doesn't think it's a good idea that they continue with the tutoring. Because of Lucas? Of course. Haley: "I don't know what I was thinking. There's no good can possibly come out of this." Nathan: "Really, I thought I saw you guys fighting back there." Haley: "Meaning what? That I should keep tutoring you to stick it to him?" She looks at Nathan: "Maybe that's how they do things in Nathan-land, but I'm not going to do that to my best friend." Nathan says, "Maybe you're doing me a favour then. Sometimes, I think it'd be easier if I got kicked off the team, especially with my dad." Haley's not buying it, though, and I give her credit for that. "I should try to go find Lucas and smooth things over." Nathan hops down off the railing. "Um, he left a while ago." Haley says, "Oh, great, I guess I'm walking."
The two of them walk around to the front of the house. Wow, Nathan really has no idea how to stop. It's like the more out-of-control his anger gets, the more he tries to rein it in by controlling other people around him. Any. Way. He convinces Haley to let him give her a ride home in Peyton's car. She's taken her hat off by now, so she can run her fingers through her hair in frustration. She relents when Nathan says, "It's the least I can do."
Dan's watching more game tapes. Deb comes into the room and shuts off the TV. She tells her husband that they need to talk. "You know," she moves further into the room and sits down, "I try to let these things roll off my back when you shut down and walk out mid-conversation. I swallow it and let it churn around in my stomach until it makes me sick." He spits, "Why, 'cause I don't want to re-hash Karen and her son" -- he rolls his eyes -- "for the 10,000th time? I'm talked out." Deb insists, "It's about Nathan." Finally, a normal parent comes to life in this side of the family. I honestly didn't think one existed. What about Nathan? Blah he's surly, blah he's distant, and blah she feels powerless, blah Dan's pressuring him since Lucas joined the team blah. Dan says, "Me?" He sits forward: "Did you ever think the problem's not with Nathan? You're never home." Because it's the mom's job to raise the kids, eh? It's not the father's responsibility to be concerned about the emotional wellbeing of his own son. God. He's such a freaking jerk. Deb defends herself: "I'm away for ten days out of the month, tops." He snaps, "When you are here you work until all hours." Deb retorts, "And do you want to know why, Dan? Because ever since you've started this basketball stuff, you've slowly been stealing him from me. I feel irrelevant." Blah she raises money for good causes, blah she matters out there, blah he shuts her out of Nathan's life blah. Dan snaps, "Shut you out? Work has always come first with you." This man takes megalomania to a whole new level. It's like he's got a giant blame-thrower in the back of his mind that refuses to let any kind of adult sense of responsibility settle in; it just rolls off like rain on leaves. Deb says she's tried to hard to balance both her work life and her home life. Dan shouts, "He's a good kid!" Deb retorts, "Based on what? His scoring average?" Dan quiets down; he tells her that he just wants what's best for their son, whatever is going to make him happy. Deb: "Well, the something's not working, Dan, because that kid I saw tonight is anything but happy." And with that, she leaves the room. You go Deb!
Brooke stumbles drunkenly down the stairs and almost topples onto Peyton, who is looking through old high school yearbooks. Brooke slurs, "Don't let me have another beer unless I beg you, same goes for boys." Heh. "What are you doing?" Peyton says morosely, "Just wondering if we're all going to end up like Karen." Who's Karen? "Lucas's mom." Brooke jokes, "Not with proper birth control we won't." Double heh. Peyton moans, "That's not what I meant. She was our age when that tape was made, Brooke. In a lot of ways, we're just like her." Brooke tries hard to pay attention. Her eyes wander. Her head bobs. But she just can't take Peyton's whiny, feel-sorry-for-me introspection; hell, it's a party, for goodness sake. "Do you think it's awful how she just let Nathan's dad treat her like crap?" Brooke mumbles, "Yeah." But then she wakes right up: "But honey, that doesn't mean we're like her, maybe that means you're like her." And with that piece of drunken wisdom, Brooke's gone in pursuit of her good time. Oh, drunken party girls are also sage -- who knew?
Nathan drops Haley off at home. She wisecracks, "Yeah, this is my house, we're staying here while we renovate the big mansion." Nathan laughs, "It's not like I was trying to show off." She snaps, "Isn't that your default setting?" He laughs awkwardly again, and Haley apologizes. They sit in the car for a minute. He asks, "Can I be honest with you?" She inhales, "I don't know, you tell me." Here, take note, Nathan seems almost human: "What I said at the beach, that was a lie. I'm really lucky to have basketball. It's pretty much my shot at everything from now on. If I lose it, it's over for me." But you know what, Nathan, there will come a point in your life where it won't be everything and it won't be all over for you -- you just have to keep that in mind so you don't turn out like your father. Haley says, "So, don't lose it." With his grades, he's close to being ineligible to do the one thing he's actually good at. Nathan: "It's not just my life, it's my dad's too. It's like he's still got something to prove to Whitey." Blah if he screws it up, blah it'll destroy Dan, blah it'll destroy Nathan blah. And he applies more pressure, taking no notice of Haley's wounds: "I know it's just going to complicate things with Lucas, but I really need your help." She promises to find him someone else. Nathan wants her because she's the best, and she won't tear him down. "It's not exactly easy having everybody know you're failing. It's you or nobody else." Haley looks like she might cry. Then she gives in -- she'll get him through the semester and then he's got to be on his own. Before she leaves the car, she tells him one more time to lay off Lucas. But wait, she's forgotten her hat! Don't worry, kiddies, it's not actually a continuity mistake; it's a point of the plot development. And it's juicy!
Luke drives the tank of a tow truck around town. He pauses for a second, but notices Peyton's car ripping through the middle of town. He gives chase, because he thinks it's Peyton. Really loud music plays, obviously one of Peyton's "lame" choices. Nathan leans down to turn it off, and the car careens out of control. It grazes another car at top speed, almost ripping the door off and sparking like a firecracker. Nathan scrambles to gain control, but the car only comes to a stop after it rams into a telephone poll. Nathan tries to start the car over and over again as Lucas comes roaring up behind them in the truck. He jumps out, screaming, "Peyton, are you okay?" Nathan gets out, feeling cocky and self-assured despite the fact that he just trashed his girlfriend's car. "Yeah, she's fine. Can't say the same for her car though." And just when you thought there might actually be a good kid underneath all the bravado and false confidence. Nathan reaches into the back of the car and grabs his beer. He snits, "And what the hell are you doing following my girlfriend?" Lucas defends himself: "I wasn't. I thought she was driving after she'd been drinking." Nathan starts to walk away. "Where are you going?" Well, he's going back to the party -- dumb-ass. Lucas: "Are you going to leave her car like this?" Nathan: "Yeah, and if you stand there, you can watch me." Lucas: "You know this is a crime, right?" Nathan: "So call the cops." Lucas: "Nathan, you can't walk away from this. I saw you do it." Nathan: "No, you didn't, because I was with Tim the whole time, which is what he'll say when they ask him." Pause. "He owes me." Pause. "So it looks like it's your word against ours, and you can guess how that'll go down." Luke takes a step forward, blah what about Peyton, blah your girlfriend blah, you're going to lie, blah walk away, blah the car's registered in her name blah. Nathan sees this as his golden moment: "Yeah, and just like you said, she was really drunk when you last saw her, maybe she did this." Pause. "But then again, all I see is a wrecked car, and you." With that, Nathan starts the long walk home to the land of his people, where all the other irresponsible assholes reside, the "right" side of town.
Luke has towed Peyton's car to Keith's garage. I guess he called Keith too, because he's there and he's pacing. He says, "Hit and run. I could lose my license for this." Luke looks down: "I didn't know what else to do. He just walked away." Keith shakes his head: "Do you want to tell me what it is with you and this girl? That you're willing to break the law for her? Nobody is worth that!" Luke shouts, "I couldn't let Nathan get away with it, and I sure as hell couldn't let him do that to her." Keith starts to pace again. What about the car Nathan hit? Luke left him a note telling him to bring it to the garage. Not quite what Keith had in mind, blah struggling to bring paying customers, blah doesn't need this on top of everything else. Luke whines, "I'll do the work myself, after hours, and I'll pay for all the materials." Keith: "You're damn right you will." See, again, normal parents dealing with normal kids who make mistakes. But hell, how come Nathan always gets himself into these kinds of situations? Does he really not care about anyone but himself? Yes, yes, I know, it's a rhetorical question. I'll stop asking them and get back to the real work. Keith: "Your mom's going to love this." Luke grovels, "She's got enough to deal with, you don't have to tell her." Nice try. Nope, Keith's not going to tell her -- Luke will. Because he's going to take something away from this mess. Damn, he's having the worst night of his life, and to make it even worse, when he reaches in to grab the keys, he notices Haley's hat on the back seat. Hell, even my stomach dropped at that moment. Damn you, OTH, for actually being kind of good; it's quite the surprise.
Karen fights with a contractor on the telephone about her broken pipes. She hangs up the phone after telling him that she'll just do the work herself. A strong chorus of "Independent Woman" breaks out in the background. It's followed by a healthy dose of "You Can't Always Get What You Want." Poor Karen. She pulls out a plumbing manual that she keeps handy for just these sorts of situations. Wow, she's so resourceful. Yawn. The wrenches, pipes, and plumbing pieces jump out and start to dance around. They're the backup dancers in Karen's pity-party musical. Double yawn. Any. Way. The door of the café opens. Without looking up, she calls out that they're closed. She notices Deb come in the door. Nathan's mother stutters, "I was hoping to get a coffee, to go." Karen doesn't say anything. She goes to the coffee pot and pours it into a carry-away cup. She says coldly, "Anything else." Deb answers quietly, "Biscotti." Karen put the cookie in the bag and tells Deb that it'll be $3.20. Deb hands her five dollars. The camera pauses on the bill in both their hands. The wrenches dance around and start to sing. No one seems to notice except me. Maybe that's because Karen and Deb have been hit in the head with the this-is-a-very-serious-scene stick. Deb doesn't wait for her change. She just starts to walk out. "Hey," Karen calls after her, "You tell Dan that if he wants to spy on me or threaten me or whatever the hell this is, he can do it himself." Deb says thoughtfully, "Dan didn't send me. I came on my own." Karen snarks, "So it's a coincidence?" Deb replies quickly, "No. I wanted you to know, everything that happened with you and Dan, I don't carry that weight around, and I don't care to." Deb steps back into the middle of the room. "Frankly, I think you've done a wonderful job raising Lucas. I've seen the two of you together. Quite honestly, it makes me a bit jealous." Deb goes on to say that she's not deluded enough to think that the relationship between their two families will be anything but awkward. Karen just listens as Deb continues, "I know how it is with you and Dan and our two boys, there's a lot of history there, but it doesn't have to be our history." And with that, she leaves -- slowly dragging her olive branch behind her. Well, it's about time someone started acting like a bloody adult. Welcome home, Deb, you've got our blessing to stay, and well done, Moira, you didn't totally suck in that scene.
Back at the beach house, Peyton watches the tape of Dan and Karen over and over again. Nathan comes back into the room. She doesn't even look at him when she says, "You re-invented cruel tonight." Nathan barks, "It was a joke." Damn, that excuse is way, way tired dude. Peyton: "Funny how you're the only one laughing." He snaps, "Like you and your stupid comic strip?" As soon as it's out of his mouth, he realizes he never should have let it go, so he apologizes. Peyton says that "sorry" is getting a bit old. He knows. He says, "But I can't remember a time when things were this bad." Peyton finally turns around: "Where have you been for the past two hours?" He makes some lame excuse about going on a beer run, because the keg ran out? Please, as if. Peyton snaps, "To where? Canada?" Again, shout-out -- where do I live, that's right, in Canada. See, this show and I have such a synergistic connection. Yawn. Peyton snarks, "Nathan. I want to go home, but I can't because it seems my car is missing. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?" He says, "I think Tim took it." He stares off into space. She screams, "You think?" Blah he told Tim he could take it, blah to take Brooke home blah. She stares at him. Then she picks up a beer cup and says, "I never told a ridiculous lie to my girlfriend's face." She holds the cup out to him. "Because Brooke got a ride home with Theresa after you disappeared." Well, see, now would be the time to confess, to actually take responsibility for his actions, but Nathan's not that smart. He just continues to lie, blah he doesn't know, blah it was some other girl, blah what's the big deal, blah he knew she was going to stay there. Peyton: "So you gave away my car?" Nathan: "Look, whatever, I'm going to bed, are you coming?" For the first time in the history of Tree Hill, Peyton actually makes the right decision: "Yeah, that's what I'm going to do," she says sarcastically as she makes a cozy bed for herself on the plush couch. "I cannot believe you just asked me that with a straight face."
When Karen gets home, she finds Luke in the kitchen. She says, "You will not believe the night I had tonight." He mopes, "Yeah, me too." She sees her son's distressed, and asks him what's going on. Luke doesn't say anything for a minute. So, she starts blabbing on about how they can fix the plumbing problem themselves. Which, judging by the mood Luke's in, might just be the wrong thing to say -- oh, there he goes, yup, not good: "So, now I'm digging ditches." He refuses to look at his mom, but continues to pick away at the kitchen table. Karen sits down. Blah what's wrong blah. Luke: "Did you know you could fit this whole house into the living room of their place at the beach?" Why did he go there? "Because I love getting dumped on." Blah he doesn't have to put up with it, blah he could just walk away blah. But you know, he's also a kid, one who might be curious about who his father is, about what really happened. It's hard to always be the mature one, especially when it's glaringly apparent that Nathan refuses to play by the same rules. Any. Way. Luke says, "Like you." Excuse me? "You never told me that you had this whole thing mapped out with Dan? That you even talked about marriage before you got pregnant." He stares hard at her, and Karen seems frozen. "All you ever told me was that he found out and took off. Look, those guys, Nathan and his ass of a father, they do whatever they want. And they screw everybody else in the process." His voice goes up about a dozen octaves. "You and I, we stand by, and we let them? You should have made him give us what we were entitled to, so we didn't have to live like this." Pause. "You should have made him pay." Karen asks Luke what happened. He replies, "I learned something tonight." He glares at his mother: "Everybody has secrets, right, Mom?" With that, he grabs the bottle of juice from the table and leaves the room. Between Luke's outburst and the visit from Deb, it looks like Karen might just break down and cry herself to sleep tonight.
There's a knock at the door the morning. Peyton yells at Nathan to get the door, only the knock is rather persistent. She gets up and sees through the wall of really nice-looking glass doors that it's Tim-Tim, the groveling king. She opens the door and asks him if he brought her car back. Tim tells her he didn't take her car, but Nathan gets to the door and gives him the eyes -- code for "please lie to Peyton and save my ass because you owe me, dude." Tim stumbles around for a bit, but Peyton doesn't buy it. "Where the hell is my car?"
Luke's doing his own kind of penance. He's digging out the broken pipe. Karen comes out, and then hides behind a bush. Heh. I always get a kick out of the pregnancy-hiding techniques of television. It's like they want us to believe without question that the two boys are the same age, but they won't just put her pregnancy out in the open, because we're smart -- we could probably just ignore that too. She asks him if he's calm enough to talk. Luke apologizes to his mother for being "pissed." He comes around and sits on the steps: "Well, the truth is I'm the reason why you never got what you wanted, so that kind of nullifies my right to complain." Karen sits down beside him: "Is that what you think? I got exactly what I wanted, Lucas. Everyone seems to think I'm some sort of victim, but I chose this." Blah Dan, Nathan, blah should have helped her out, blah she's glad he never offered, blah didn't know what she would have said, blah would have been a bigger price to pay, blah given them money, blah he could have had a say. Luke nods as his mother says, "You've seen how Nathan's turned out." She takes a sip of coffee. Luke says, "Like father like son." Karen continues, "And who do you think we should be feeling sorry for?"
Dan comes back from his run. Because he's not aggressive enough. Deb tells him Nathan's still not home. Dan doesn't seem concerned. In fact, he tells her to give it a rest, because according to Dadzilla, Nathan's a responsible, disciplined kid. Huh. Well. Isn't he just surprised to find out that Keith just called him? And that's right, he told Deb the whole story about Nathan crashing Peyton's car and just walking away, leaving Lucas to clean up the mess. Now, there's responsibility for you. Dan says curtly, "I'll talk to him." Deb replies, "You'll talk to him. Is that all you have to say?" What does she want from him? Deb doesn't know, but one thing she knows for sure -- the two of them have gotten a little too comfortable when she's not around. What's up? Deb's not going to travel any more for work; she's going to stay home and make sure the asshole doesn't grow too out of control. You go Deb. Dan just looks at her, "Come on, Deb, you don't have to do this." She says smartly, "I don't have to or you don't want me to?" Nathan walks in at that moment. He doesn't say hello, he doesn't greet either of his parents; he just says snottily, "What?" Oh, buddy, you don't even know half of what's coming your way.
Luke walks into Keith's garage. He hangs his head low. Keith jokes, "You're still alive. I guess you didn't tell your mom about your little crime spree yet, did you?" Luke leans on Peyton's car: "This morning. She's thinking about my punishment right now." Keith says, "Good. Recognize that car over there? The owner got your note. I convinced him not to press charges. Let's get to work so we can start billing people again." Luke thanks his uncle, nods his head, then turns and notices Nathan coming into the shop. He calls out, "What do you want?" Keith answers, "I suspect his parents sent him." Luke turns to Keith and says, "You told them?" Well, Keith says, Luke might be willing to let Nathan get away with it, but he sure as heck wasn't about to. "Try not to kill each other, girls." Luke walks toward Nathan, who says coolly, "Peyton wants to know when she's going to get her car back." Luke replies, "When it's fixed." Nathan: "How much is the work going to cost?" Luke snaps, "I don't know. A lot. Why?" Nathan wants Luke to give him the invoice when the work's done; apparently, Dan will write a cheque. Luke won't take the money. Nathan shakes his head: "Didn't you hear me, we'll pay you." Luke insists, "You want to pay me? Stay away from me." Nathan shakes his head, turns to leave, and mutters, "Suit yourself." Luke follows him: "Whatever you're up to, stay the hell away from Haley." Nathan replies, "We were just talking, man, you know, like you and Peyton." Then he walks away, without having to do any work or take any real responsibility for what he did.
Nathan shows up at Peyton's, looking rather humble. He tells her that her car will be ready on Friday. Funny, that's not what Luke said; in fact, he never gave Nathan any specific information about when the car would be ready. Peyton says, "The bag by the door is yours, take it." He asks her what's going on; then he notices that there's a necklace he gave her in the bag. He says that he gave it to her. She cracks, "You mean the leash, no thanks." Nathan throws the bag on the bed, leans down to where she's sitting, and says, "Peyton, come on, my mom's going to cool down and everything'll be back to normal." She gets up and moves out from under the hand he placed on her shoulder: "Trust me. The last thing I want with us is normal. In case you haven't noticed, normal sucks with us, Nathan." He snits, "Is this about your car? 'Cause I'm taking care of that." She shouts, "It's not about the car. I finally saw you clearly last night. The way you treated me, the way you treated Tim, the way you treated your brother!" Nathan: "Don't call him that!" Peyton: "And the way you're playing that girl." Nathan: "What? Are you talking about Haley? Is that what this is about? Peyton, she means nothing." Buzz. Wrong answer, buddy. Peyton yells, "Okay, if that's the case, you're an ass, and if she does mean something then you're really an ass. And what's really sad, Nathan, is that you're too stupid to get that." She thanks him for being such an incredible son of a bitch and for making it a "no-brainer." He tries to walk out the door, saying something silly like he'll call Peyton when she's not so "PMS'd." Peyton says, "Don't bother, I mean it, we're done. So get the hell out." He stands there dumbfounded. She throws the bag at him: "I mean it! Get the hell out." Nathan leaves, and Peyton falls on her bed.
Later that night, Nathan contemplates what happened as he looks at the necklace.
Haley lies on her bed thinking.
Peyton draws more comics.
Luke sits in her car at the garage and reads her comic strip.
It must be the day. Luke comes into Karen's Café as Haley's cleaning the counters. She says, "Hey! I'm glad to see you, I was beginning to think you were avoiding me." He doesn't say anything, so Haley keeps talking: "Luke. I was just trying to help and then you jumped down my throat." He still doesn't say anything. So, again, she carries on, with guilt as heavy in her actions as it is in her words: "We've always been able to talk about stuff, you know. I just had this great idea that if you could see things from Nathan's side." She squeezes some water at him: "You're just a big pain in the butt sometimes." He smiles, for a second. Then he says ironically, "At least we can still be honest with each other." Haley says, "Yeah, at least." He asks pointedly, "So if anything were going on with you, anything weird or confusing, you would still be honest with me, right?" She agrees. He tosses the hat on the counter. And looks at her in such a way that her heart breaks into a thousand pieces. "You left that in Peyton's car." He taps the counter, turns around, and then leaves. Haley just stands there, looking after him, obvious amounts of pain in her face. Wow, it looks like precious few relationships came out of this week unscathed. Finally, a decent episode, hurrah!
week, welcome the melodramatic crap back as Peyton comes to terms with the death of her mother by repeating bad patterns, well, by driving like a maniac and almost getting herself killed.