You know how -- a lot of times -- I nearly turn the recaplet into a recap? This isn't going to be one of those times, because my first impression was that neither you nor I should spend excess time on "In the Name of the Brother." Take heart (not in an Enchanted way), though, sometimes I soften between the recaplet and recap. This time, that I softened right in the middle of writing the recaplet, so if it seems disjointed, well, it matches my brain.
"In the Name of the Brother" is the last episode before a three-week break, I'm tempted to accept it as a set-up. I typically use a different scale when considering set-ups, because like pilots, these episodes are the load bearing walls of our fictional universe. I'm having a hard time filing "In the Name of the Brother" in that category though, because... well, because I pay attention to the show. Save a few predictable developments, which take all of two minutes to unfold, precious little of "In the Name of the Brother," seems to matter a whit. I'm more preoccupied with speculation fodder based on character names than with actual on-screen events. I don't want to embiggen her head, but seeing as this episode flows from the pen of the perfectly cromulent Jane Espenson, I keep telling myself I must be blind to the enchanted forest on account of the (less enchanting) trees.
In the fictional past which occurs both before and after the flashback events of "The Doctor," a red-caped Rumpy makes his way to Viktor Frankenstein's black and white world. In return for his help in punking Regina, Rumpy offers the doctor a pile of gold and the promise of a sturdy, magical heart. The flashback visuals are fun. At first they make me think of the film adaptation of The Wizard of Oz -- in the sense that magic brings color to a drab world. As the hour progresses though, the black and white/color play makes me wish I was watching Schindler's List, because the flashback events are not only predictable, but they strike me as a largely unimportant expansion of what we already know of Whale's backstory.
In Once Upon A Time's Bowdlerization of Frankenstein canon, Viktor plays second fiddle to brother Gerhardt (Chad Michael Collins). Yes, the brother's name is Gerhardt (which means spear-hard or spear-brave), rather than either Ernest or William. Is there a reason for that? Given the episode title (and that wordsmith Jane is the writer), I can't help but wonder. While Papa Frankenstein (Gregory Itzin) gives Gerhardt his grandfather's pocket watch, he gives Viktor a military commission so he'll stop monkeying around in his lab. Toward that end, Papa also stops funding Viktor's tomfoolery. I'd love to berate Papa, except someone certainly should cut off Viktor's funding, and possibly his fingers. Of course, without his fingers, he'd be unable to smudge his eyeliner into that smoky-eyed look he's sporting in the flashbacks. Wait. That settles it. Off with his hands!
Gerhardt is shot while Viktor is grave-robbing. Viktor tries his "science" to restore his brother's life, but the electricity fries his heart. After Viktor works with Rumpy and Jefferson (see "The Doctor") he returns with an enchanted heart and reanimates Gerhardt's corpse. Gerhardt is a monster. Papa freaks. Gerhardt beats him (possibly to death, I have to go back and watch that, again). Gerhardt also attacks his brother, but then has a moment approaching clarity, says his first word ("Viktor") and restrains himself. Viktor is going to shoot Gerhardt and put him out of everyone's misery, but can't bring himself to pull the trigger, not even when Gerhardt grabs the barrel of the gun and puts it to his own forehead.
In Storybrooke, the action picks up right where we left off at the end of "The Outsider." Rumpy heals Belle's gunshot wound, but can't restore her memories, not even later on -- with a kiss. Perhaps it isn't true love, after all. Maybe Grumpy should give it a try, since Nova is nowhere to be found (and doesn't ever seem to be on the Dwarf's mind), but I digress. Later, Rumpy brings Belle the chipped cup, and she smashes it. Jane Espenson, did Cora (or Regina, or Rumpy) rip out your heart? You made Belle smash Chip! I really wish I knew your middle name, because you deserve to be called by three names right now, Miss Jane.
Anyhoodle, Hook has broken ribs and Rumpy wants to kill him, but Charming reminds him to think of Belle. Since Belle can't remember Rumpy, or even herself, her opinions aren't the best bait -- at least not until Emma reminds the imp that murder doesn't make a great first impression. Oh and the Stranger? He's so hurt that he's rushed by ambulance to the hospital.
Dr. Whale (Frankenstein) doesn't want to operate on the Stranger (Ethan Embry). This brother's name is Greg Mendel. I think the show spells it Mendell, but since they don't give a rat's patootie about changing the spelling of names, why should I? Besides, once again, my mind returns to the episode title, and I'm hoping those of you who didn't automatically think of Gregor Mendel will type it into your Magical Google Machines, and start speculating, but I digress, yet again.
Whale isn't refusing to operate because he is drunk and therefore unfit to perform (which he is), just because he's having personal issues. And really, none of the townies are completely thrilled with saving the outsider's life. Rumpy refuses to magically heal the man because he knows Mendel saw him preparing to rain magical fire on Hook. Emma serves as the town conscience and reminds them they have to save Mendel's life and worry about what he saw after.
Whale disappears from the hospital. Using her wolf-sense, Red follows his boozy scent and has a heart-to-heart with him about how Storybrooke isn't a curse for monsters like them, so much as it is a second chance. Confidence restored, Whale returns to the hospital, operates on Mendel and saves his life -- without slicing his hepatic artery. Since Snow knows Whale was hitting the sauce, and announces it to everyone who is anyone, does it not strike you as strange that no one objects to him performing surgery? Storybrooke Hospital needs Jack Shephard, stat.
Mendel recovers. Emma questions him to determine what he saw before the crash. The Stranger lies, so of course Emma's super power fails her, and she believes that he saw nothing. The whole scene makes me cringe on her behalf. Expect a good tantrum in the full recap. I mean forget the lie detection business -- her interrogation skills are non-existent. By episode's end, Mendel is on the phone, telling someone that she'll never believe what he saw. I know just how he feels.
In other news, Cora gets to Regina before Emma or Henry can. Let the manipulation begin. And in other-other news, Cora gives Hook a magical globe -- supposedly as a peace offering. In return, she wants him to let her get Regina back, and to let them live. Calling him Master, Cora shakes Rumpy's hand, but then asks to seal their deal with a kiss, "Like we used to." Oh boy! On top of the globe is a spindle (well, more of a spike, but how can I not call it a spindle?). Once Rumpy is alone with it, he pricks his finger on it, lets the blood drip down onto the globe and is able to locate Baelfire's general location. He finds Emma and calls in his favor. She needs to help him find Bae.
I'll be back with the full recap, later this week. In the meantime, please grade the episode at the top of the page and then come on over to the forum, where we're cultivating plants, until we achieve a pea fit to lay beneath the mattress of a princess. Oh and if you can figure out the origin of my headline and its connection to this episode, I'll give you a gold star on Twitter.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!A few readers got gold stars on Twitter for figuring out (and yes, probably via the Magical Google Machine) the origin of my headline, "I Will Sing My Maker's Praises" and its connection to this episode. Paul Gerhardt was a 17th Century German pastor and hymnist. Spellcheck says hymnist isn't a word, but spellcheck is wrong. Hymnodist would also be appropriate, but hymnist is fine. A better known Gerhardt work is "O Sacred Head Now Wounded." Since "In the Name of the Brother" features Frankenstein's past and in it, Viktor's brother is renamed Gerhardt, and SPOILER Viktor "operates" on Gerhardt, "I Will Sing My Maker's Praises" seems more appropriate. The Magical Google Machine says writer Jane Espenson grew up in Ames, Iowa. Just for giggles, I ask it about Lutheran Churches in Ames. The place is crawling with them. Back in Springfield, wherever that is, Lisa Simpson nods, knowingly. Thanks for playing! Now let's go on with our show.
We open where we left off, last week Right after Hook shoots Belle and the impact sends her across the town line and into amnesia, a supposed outsider (played by Ethan Embry) has careens down the road. He narrowly avoids Rumpy and Belle, and sends Hook flying ass over teakettle. As Hook writhes alone in well-deserved pain, Belle is freaking out. She has just been shot. She doesn't know where she is. She doesn't know Rumpy. She doesn't even recognize her own name.
Just as Emma, Charming and Snow arrive on the scene, Rumpy magically heals Belle's gunshot wound. Her shoulder feels better, but the poor girl is more frightened than ever. As Emma calls in the accident to her imaginary staff, Rumpy tells Snow and Charming about Belle.
Emma wanders over to Hook, who despite his pain, is still on the make. He tries to smile but it's more of a wince. "Hey beautiful." When Emma bends down to check out his injuries, Hook says, "Here I didn't think you'd NOTICE..." She diagnoses him with broken ribs when he screams out. Hook says, "That must be why it hurts when I laugh," because he's new to the series, and doesn't understand that I get to make the lame jokes. He's pretty banged up, but not too hurt to gloat. "Did you see his face? His own true love, gone in an instant."
As Rumpy approaches, Hook struggles to rise. "Just like Milah, Crocodile, when you took her from me." Gold says, "But you took her first," and then kicks Hook in the face. When Emma asks Gold if he's insane, the audience yells, "He manipulated a young woman to the extent that she became an evil queen who cursed her entire world. Of course he's insane." Gold agrees with us and hops on top of Hook to continue the beating. Charming rushes over and pulls him off. It's a very junior high school fight. Emma reminds Gold he doesn't want Belle to see him like this, but that only further enrages him because he's a stranger to her. Emma says, "Murder is a bad first impression," which is an excellent argument. Between Charming asking, "What would Belle want you to do," and the siren song of the arriving ambulance (sorry), Gold is distracted from exacting revenge. Emma's imaginary dispatcher must have sent the ambulance. Good call.
As Rumpy approaches, Hook struggles to rise. "Just like Milah, Crocodile, when you took her from me." Gold says, "But you took her first," and then kicks Hook in the face. When Emma asks Gold if he's insane, the audience yells, "He manipulated a young woman to the extent that she became an evil queen who cursed her entire world. Of course he's insane." Gold agrees with us and hops on top of Hook to continue the beating. Charming rushes over and pulls him off. It's a very junior high school fight. Emma reminds Gold he doesn't want Belle to see him like this, but that only further enrages him because he's a stranger to her. Emma says, "Murder is a bad first impression," which is an excellent argument. Between Charming asking, "What would Belle want you to do," and the siren song of the arriving ambulance (sorry), Gold is distracted from exacting revenge. Emma's imaginary dispatcher must have sent the ambulance. Good call.
As Emma orders the EMTs around, Snow realizes there's a driver in the car the hit Hook. The Charmings conclude that the driver is a stranger. Emma: "Looks like the world just came to Storybrooke." After the title card, we cut to the hospital. Whale is multi-tasking; he's studiously ignoring the voice paging him to the E.R. and drinking at the same time. We flashback to...
Frankenstonia. It's Christmas time. Viktor (look, the show changed the spelling of his name; I'm just going with it), his brother Gerhardt (Chad Michael Collins, whom my Ringlets might recognize as Agent Conroy) and Papa Frankenstein (Gregory Itzin) share a Christmas toast in front of a towering tannenbaum. Gerhardt has just been awarded the Silver Cross and Papa is bursting at the seams. Papa presents his sons with gifts. He gives Gerhardt his grandfather's pocket watch. He gives Viktor a military commission. While I am unimpressed with Papa's gifts, Papa is unimpressed with Viktor's science, and has kicked him off the gravy train, as well. Defending himself, Viktor says, "I have made great progress. The name Frankenstein is going to stand for life! Life everlasting, here on earth." Oh, as usual, dear. We flash forward to the...
Storybrooke Hospital. Emma orders the triage nurse to hide Hook, and that's a good thing because here comes Gold. I know, I usually stick to the Fairy Tale names, but I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle. I hope that by now, you've all watched and read enough to follow along when I waffle between names. Anyhow, Charming barks to no one at all to get Gold out of there. He's freaking out over Belle. Whale all but staggers out and tries to control the situation. We flashback to...
Frankenstonia. Exterior. It is a dark and stormy night. Gerhardt chases after Viktor, assures him their father will cool off, and gives him the pocket watch. As the eldest, mother would have wanted Viktor to inherit it. Viktor refuses the well-meaning gesture and tells his brother not to worry about him. "I'll find another way." Once Viktor heads off and Gerhardt heads back toward the house, Rumpy peeks out from behind a tree. His gold-flecked skin and red cape stand out in the black and white world of Frankenstonia. We flash forward to...
Belle's hospital room. As Belle sleeps, Gold bends over and kisses her. She smiles as she wakes, but once her eyes focus on Gold, she screams in terror. She should see him when he's golden. Two attendants rush to the room. Backing away, Gold keeps repeating that he's sorry. I can't help but wonder if it's not true love between these two after all. I know this town line amnesia could have another antidote entirely, but a girl can hope! We cut to...
Hook's hospital room. Emma asks where Cora is. When Hook tries to get up, he realizes he's handcuffed to the bed, and teases Emma about being into that kind of thing. When Hook continues to flirt rather than answer her questions, Emma threatens him. "You have all sorts of sore places I can make you hurt," and then what do you know? She immediately does so. Hook says he has no idea where Cora is, but wonders where his hook is. "May I have it back, or is there another attachment you would prefer?" Seriously? Excuse me for clutching at my pearls, but...but... He's been in our world all of two minutes and he already knows about such things?! The harbor master ought to password protect his Wi-Fi connection. Emma comments on Hook being awfully chipper, considering he failed to kill Rumpy and got hit by a car. Hook: "My ribs may be broken, but..." he glances down at himself and then back up at Emma. "...Everything else is still intact." Oh goodness. My kids watch this show, Show.
Hook is pleased that he managed to hurt his foe. When Emma reminds him he hurt Belle, Hook corrects her. "I hurt his heart. Belle is just where he keeps it. He killed my love. I know the feeling." Emma leans over and smirks. "Keep smiling, buddy. You're chained down. He's on his feet, immortal, has magic and you hurt his girl." Her smile fades. "If I were to pick dead guy of the year, I'd pick you." When Hook grins at her, Emma tries to return the favor, but her heart isn't it in. When she leaves, Hook struggles against his cuffs.
Emma finds Red, Grumpy and her folks out in the hallway. The Outsider's phone is password protected. When Charming suggests Grumpy hack into it, Grumpy cracks, "Well you do understand that computer hacking and pickaxe hacking are different?" As Emma takes the phone and inserts something into the jack, she mentions that she found stuff in the Outsider's car. His name is Greg Mendell (not here it isn't, Emma; here, it's Gregor Mendel). Once Emma is able to access the phone, she sees pictures of Mendel alone at a bunch of Eastern Seaboard tourist locations, his LinkedIn account and that he tweets pictures of his food. I'm really hungry, but I'm up against my deadline, so I'm trying to wake my husband using only the powers of my mind so that he'll go get us lunch. Cross your fingers for me.
When Emma decides Greg is likely an ordinary Joe, Red does not find this comforting. "So, whatever's kept random people from stumbling through Storybrooke for the last 28 years..." Snow finishes the thought: "Is gone!" Charming dons his Captain Obvious cape. "Anyone could drive in. Why are my instincts telling me that's a bad thing?" Grumpy: "Because you've seen E.T., or Splash, or any other movie where they find something magical and study it to death. Think what they'd do to a werewolf." Red's face pretty much says, "Thanks a lot, Grumpy." I vented about this is the recaplet, so I'll spare you further venting, here.
As everyone continues to fret, Emma tries to talk them down, but then ratchets the tension back up by saying, "Hook says he doesn't know where Cora is, and God knows what she's going to do. With other people coming here, that's not going to be good for anyone." When Snow says they have to get to Regina and let her know she was framed, Red says she's had no luck tracking her. Snow panics about Cora finding her first. The timing couldn't be worse.
After freaking everyone out, Emma goes back to being the voice of reason, and suggests that Greg will probably be on his way home by morning. As if on cue (because, well, it is) Whale arrives and says that isn't likely. The Outsider is bleeding into his chest cavity. Soon, he'll be drowning in his own blood. When Emma tells Whale to make it stop, Whale ignores her. Spying Gold coming down the stairs, Whale approaches him and asks him to magically fix the patient. Gold refuses. He doesn't owe anything to any of them, and some of them owe him (hi, Emma). "And point of interest? The driver? He saw me throwing some magic, so instead of trying to get him out of here, you'd better be hoping he dies because if he doesn't, he's going to be driving tour buses up and down Main Street." Whale nods. Gold, needing an exit line, says he doesn't give a damn and stalks off. Pardon me for being a pain in the ass, but if Gregor Mendel did see a magical fireball, couldn't people just lie to him and tell him he must have been hallucinating?
Whale wonders if Gold doesn't have a point. He can let the Outsider die if that's what they decide. Emma whispers that they need to take the conversation somewhere private. We cut to Whale letting them in a supply closet as he declares that it's not really murder if they let him succumb to his injuries. Emma disagrees. Snow insists they save him. Charming backs her up, but Grumpy thinks Whale makes an excellent point. Is it worth it to save him if it kills the whole town? When Charming says they can worry about the town later, Snow must be thinking of their argument (last week) about settling there, because she doesn't want to abandon it. Charming isn't speaking that far ahead. He clarifies that they should save the Outsider first, worry about that later. When he tells Whale to prep for surgery, Whale nods and walks out.
Once the doctor is gone, Snow asks, "Did anyone else notice he's drunk off his ass?" Everyone just looks at each other until their silence is broken by the Star Wars theme, which is the Outsider's ringtone. Emma decides to rile everyone up again, so she can talk them down, later. "Someone's looking for Greg. How long 'til they come here?" Commercial. Thank goodness. This is a dialogue heavy episode. I need to clear my head and figure out how to be briefer. Not to go all George Bernard Shaw on you, but I'm sorry this recap is so long. I haven't had time to make it shorter.
Frankenstonia. As Viktor is packing up his lab, Rumpy pops in. While his deceased are better kept where they are, he wants to know how Viktor does what he does. He wants to know more and he's willing to pay. He empties a small sack onto the floor. Its contents expand into a huge pile of gold. The deal is Viktor must teach Rumpy to wield the power he wields. Viktor is down with that. Just then Igor enters the lab, when Viktor turns to introduce him to Rumpy, he finds the imp has disappeared. The gold is still there, in living color, on their black and white floor. I write "flaw" there. That's taking my Boston accent to an extreme. Viktor tells Igor to bring the equipment back to the lab. They're staying, and they're going to need a body. We flash forward to...
Storybrooke. Gold's Shop. When Gold hears a noise, he peeks through the blinds, but there's nothing there. Turning back around, he notices a chest that wasn't there, before. Cora appears and startles him. He says, "I'd hoped you were dead, but hey, disappointment's just a part of life. I'm sure we can agree on that." Cora says, "Oh, the crocodile snaps at the little bird." Damn it, Jane. It's your fault this is taking me so long. You know I love to quote you. Well, I'm tired and hungry (and my husband is still napping), so I'm not going to do it, whenever I can help it.
Cora says her gift is a peace offering. She wants her daughter back. If Rumpy will let Cora try to get Regina back and let them live, she will help him find his son. When Cora nods at the chest, Rumpy opens it to find a completely white globe. Rumpy knows it's enchanted. He wonders if she has any spells to return memories. Cora says, "I only know what you taught me, master." When Rumpy accepts her offer of a truce and shakes her hand, Cora says, "Let's seal it like we used to," and then leans in and kisses him. I've seen some people say they find this more disturbing than Gold and Belle. I don't -- or at least, not on the same level. Her calling him, "Master," is gross, of course, but I'm pretty sure Cora can hold her own. Now I'm hoping Rumpy is Regina's biological father. I think. Maybe. Who knows. It's time to flash forward to the...
Hospital. When Charming finds Whale, the doctor is looking at the Outsider's watch, as if to signal he's dealing with demons from his past. Well, it signals that to us, not so much to Charming. Charming knows Whale is stalling though, and asks if his arm is okay. Whale answers, "I'm not drunk." Charming takes his word for it and tells Whale to save the guy. "I don't care what he saw. We don't let go of people." When Charming leaves, Whale gives Greg's watch a meaningful look. We flash back to...
Frankenstonia. Cemetery. Night. Despite the storm, Gerhardt finds Viktor grave robbing and is understandably alarmed. Viktor's all, "I thought you supported me." Gerhardt shouldn't have to, but he says, "Not like this." Just then, a sentry orders them to halt. When Viktor tells him not to shoot and that they have orders, the sentry fires. The Frankenstein brothers run for their carriage. It's only once they're inside that Viktor realizes his brother has been shot. Looking down, he sees the glass face of the pocket watch is cracked. We flash forward to the...
Storybrooke Hospital. Someone is calling Greg's phone again. It's the same person, who is only identified in the Caller I.D. as "Her." Given his recent history with philandering, Charming suggests it must be a girlfriend. Snow thinks they should answer the call and let "Her" know Greg is okay, but Emma points out he's not. Charming is afraid the police could trace the call. Emma explains the phone can be found, even if no one answers it because apparently tonight she needs to be on every side of a given argument.
When an orderly approaches the group and then quickly turns on his heels, they stop him. He admits he's looking for Whale, who never showed up to the O.R. When the orderly pages him, the gang hears a pager beep. The sound is coming from a nearby scrubs hamper. Emma pulls out Whale's hospital coat, looks down at the name tag and pulls out the page. "He's gone." Commercial.
Red grimmaces as she tries to pick up boozy Whale's scent from his hospital coat. Emma asks Red to find him and says they'll keep an eye on Hook, while they try to figure out their options, if Whale doesn't return. When Snow suggests that perhaps Doc could perform the operation, Grumpy laughs. "Surgery?" His smile disappears. "No." There's no way to do justice to his delivery. Watch the episode if you haven't already.
When Snow wonders if Cora snatched Whale, Charming says he doesn't think so. "[Whale] has been in a rough place since he brought Regina's fiancé back to life." While Snow is all, "Daniel?" Emma is all, "Back to life?" No one thinks too much of hearing Charming say that Daniel ripped off Whale's arm. Snow is still stuck on Daniel's name, and Emma is still stuck on the larger question. "Like some kind of Frankenstein?" Charming says, "That's Whale. And Daniel was his..." Alarmed, Snow says, "What went on here while we were gone?" Emma interrupts her arguing parents like you do when they're about to get into it in front of your friends, and tells Ruby to get going. "Bring back Dr. Frankenstein. We're going to send this guy back home with bolts in his neck." Missing the point, Snow's, "She'll find him," comment is less than reassuring to Emma, who wonders in what sort of state they'll find the good doctor. We cut to...
Downtown. Whale runs down the street so quickly that he crosses both space and time and we flashback to...
Frankestonia. Gerhardt's corpse is hooked up to Viktor's machine. When he turns it on, electricity shoots through the corpse. After it runs its... what do I call it -- a cycle? While I once worked in a hospital, coded procedures and maintained the charge master, I'm woefully bereft of Revivification Medicine Terminology. When Viktor sees smoke rises from the scar on Gerhardt's chest (and who sewed him up -- a toddler), rather than cutting through the enormous sutures, he makes a fresh cut and removes Gerhardt's heart. Igor is Captain Obvious in this realm and says, "It's burned. Like coal." Viktor tells Igor to cover Gerhardt. "This sheet will serve as his shroud."
Papa Frankenstein chooses exactly that moment to enter the lab and confront Viktor -- who was spotted bringing a body into the house. When Papa sees Gerhardt's corpse, he makes it abundantly clear that the deceased was his favorite son, as if the Christmas gifts didn't do the job. Father and son argue. Finally, Viktor says he operated on Gerhardt for his father's sake, too. "I wanted you to have two sons again." Papa sneers. "And now I have none." We flash forward to...
Storybrooke. Regina's house. Cora snoops around, pokes over Regina's things and sniffs her clothing. I am not making that up. It is in Henry's room she finds what she's looking for. There's a little plaque, featuring an imprint of his hand. Beneath, in childish letters, is the inscription, "FOR MOMMY." Cora smiles with delight. We cut to the...
Storybrooke Cemetery. Henry, who seems to be no better supervised now that he has two mommies and at least two (probably three) grandparents, as well as a great-grandmother of sorts in town, strolls across the cemetery and into the Mills crypt. Of course, it isn't Henry at all. It is Cora -- or currently, Hora. Inside, Hora pushes aside Regina's father's coffin, descends to the vault and calls out, "Mom?" Back in her house, which has really been bedazzled since magic came to town, Regina can hear "Henry's" voice. Approaching a wall of mirrors, she stops in front of one and waves her hand before it. She sees Hora looking for her. Hora calls out to her, asks her if she's in there and if he can come in. Regina's smile fades. Hora starts to walk away, but behind him, a secret door opens. It leads right into Regina's house. Once Hora is inside, she hugs Regina.
When Regina tells Hora she had nothing to do with Archie and that she was framed, "he" says "he" knows and always did know. When Regina asks how, Hora says it's simple. Hora is then enveloped in a dark purple cloud of smoke and turns into Cora, who says, "Because I did it." In shock, Regina says, "Mother?" Commercial.
Frankenstonia. Gerhardt's corpse is submerged in a tank full of bubbling liquid. Nearby, Viktor is looking into his microscope when Rumpy appears and asks him if "it" worked. Rumpy tells him about the enchanted hearts in his realm, and makes the deal with him that will lead to the events of "The Doctor." We flash forward to...
Storybrooke. Regina's house. What is that white tree inside with the white lights and red apples? It's so crazy, I love it. When did all this crap get in Regina's house? I like to think she's so far over the edge now that her psyche is working overtime and all these things magically appear as she sleeps. Cora wants to kiss and make up. She says she knows why Regina sent her through the looking glass and tried to have her killed, and it's all right. She claims to love her daughter and her eyes well with what are probably crocodile tears as she says she's shown her love in the wrong ways, and shouldn't have made her marry King Leopold.
While Cora seems to be getting to her daughter, Regina retains enough presence of mind to realize that Cora framed her, for, as Regina puts it, "The cricket." Cora admits this and says it was temporary so that Regina could see what the Storybrookers feel about her. There's more back and forth until Regina puts a stop to it by saying they're going to town so that Regina can clear her name. When Cora points out it's the middle of the night, Regina doesn't care. "We'll wake them up -- Emma and Henry and the two idiots, and you can tell them how you lied. You owe me that." I'm going to have a really hard time not calling Snow and Charming "the two idiots." Cora thinks if she does this, Regina will agree to a fresh start, but Regina says she doesn't see that happening. She's trying hard to be worthy of Henry and deserves the same treatment from her own mother. Cora says, "For you, sweetheart, anything." Don't believe her for a moment, Regina!
Red finds Whale at the waterfront. He tosses the Outsider's broken watch in the drink, tells Red not to come near him, and then attempts to jump in. Red rushes to him and grabs him by the coat after he's jumped, but before he plunges into the water. We flash back to...
Frankenstonia. The events of "The Doctor" have already taken place. With the magical heart he tricked out of Regina, Viktor brings Gerhardt back to life or something like it. When Igor proclaims that it's magic, Viktor corrects him that it's science. We cut to the Frankenstein family parlor. Viktor has just broken the news to Papa and presents him with Gerhardt, whom he claims is still recovering. When Papa grabs and candle and holds it up to Gerhardt's face, Gerhardt reacts with fear to the flame. My fellow Buffy aficionados will understand how badly I want to say, "Fire bad, tree pretty," right now, but this is really just a "fire bad" situation. Papa declares Gerhardt a monster and gets verbally and then physically abusive with Viktor, so Gerhardt beats the snot out of him. Viktor calls him off and puts his fingers to the old man's throat then looks at his little brother. "You've killed our father." Gerhardt groans as he lumbers off. We flash forward to...
Storybrooke Waterfront. Red and Whale have a heart to heart about being monsters. Both actors should get Emmy awards for keeping a straight face throughout this scene. Red says, "I ate my boyfriend. Regina thought she was punishing us by erasing who we were, but I think she was underestimating how much crap we wanted to forget, but we can't let it stop us. She gave us a chance to start over, and I want to take it. I think you should, too." Whale says he wasn't such a bad guy. He starts blathering about how his father never got over their mother's death, but Red interrupts him and reminds him that there's a patient back in the hospital. Maybe Whale can fix him. We cut to...
Regina's car. When Regina asks if Cora is nervous, she says she's fine with owning up to what she's done, but these "carriages" are strange. Reaching under her skirt, she says something is irritating her. It's then that she pulls out Henry's plaque and reads, "Oh, for Mommy. That used to be you." When Regina asks when Cora was in her house, Cora lies that she wasn't, but Regina knows the truth. Cora doesn't care, and trying to manipulate Regina out of making things right with Emma and the two idiots. When she asks Regina what she wants, Regina answers, "My son back," but instead of driving to Snow's place, she pulls her car over and parks in front of that bar called The Rabbit Hole. Cora says she just wants her daughter back. She apologizes again and asks Regina to let her into her heart. "Together, we can get him back again." Regina leans into Cora, who takes her into her arms. When Regina asks, "How?" Cora answers, "I have a few thoughts."
Storybrooke Hospital. When Red brings Whale back to the hospital, he covers by saying he just needed to stretch his legs. As he heads off to the O.R., he glances back at Red and they share a look.
Frankenstonia. Viktor finds Gerhardt in his cell. He tries to talk to him and figure out if his brother is truly inside that body. When Viktor gets too close, Gerhardt attacks him. As he's throttling Viktor, Gerhardt's face softens. Loosening his grip, he says, "Vik...tor?" When Viktor whispers, "Yes," the startled Gerhardt jumps off him and curls up in the corner. Drawing his gun, Viktor heads toward his monster. He aims at the back of Gerhardt's head, but can't go through with it. Gerhardt looks up, grabs the barrel of Viktor's gun and places it on his own forehead. Refusing to shoot, Viktor tells Gerhardt their father was wrong. Viktor promises to find a way to save his brother and walks out, leaving him alone in his cell. We flash forward to the...
Storybrooke Hospital. Whale reports that Mendel will live. Red is thrilled for her new friend (Whale, not Gregor Mendel). The Charmings are relieved, but Grumpy is sure this will come to no good. Since the patient has been out of surgery for a while and is now awake, Whale says they can question him. Charming's ready, but Emma informs him they are not talking to him as a group. Normal sheriffs in normal towns don't bring their parents to interrogations. But wouldn't it be awesome if they did? I think you're guilty and so do my Mommy and Daddy. We cut to...
Belle's hospital room. Gold is there, showing her the chipped cup. He asks her to hold it and take a good look. He explains that it's a talisman, but when he says, "castle," while trying to tell Belle the backstory, he freaks her out some more. When he tries to explain that he charmed the cup and that it's magic, Belle gets agitated. Grabbing the cup, she throws it across the room, where it shatters into a hundred pieces. Looking up at Gold, she pleads with him to go away. He whispers that he's sorry and limps out.
Mendel's hospital room. Emma brings Greg his personal effects (minus the watch) and gets him a glass of water. The end. Okay, it's not the end. She then questions him in such an amateur fashion that I'm convinced a random five year old off the street could do better. I hate when the show sacrifices character for plot. In an ongoing story like this, characterization is important. I'm not claiming that Emma is supposed to be the world's best sheriff. Far from it. But she's not a moron. Going back to the pilot, she was quite adept at deceiving people when needed, which makes sense for a street smart pseudo-orphan, who did some time behind bars. I'm not dignifying her questions with further attention -- they're that awkward.
Greg pretends he saw nothing before the accident because he was texting. Emma seems to believe him and says, "It's okay. I'm just glad you were honest with me." Watching her now, it seems to me she must know he is lying and lets him off with a warning in hopes of not provoking him. I'm still leaning that way, but if so, I can't figure out the scene.
Out in the hall, Emma informs Grumpy, Whale, Red and her parents that they're in the clear. Charming hopes that everything will calm down for a few, so they can catch their breath. Emma's face is grim, so I hope she's lying to everyone so she can handle this on her own, except -- how can she do that? Doesn't keeping them in the dark put everyone at a greater risk of discovery? And? If I'm wrong, if Emma truly believes Greg, then I'm a little angry. I know last season, the show runners gave interviews in which they said Emma's superpower is dampened when she's emotional. I can understand why she'd be crappy at knowing Sydney was tricking her when she was so worried about Henry, but it seems to me that either the series has to show them working sometime, or else they need to have a very special episode in which Emma admits to herself that she wouldn't know the truth if it bit her in the ass.
Gold's shop. Gold takes out the white globe he got from Cora and pricks his finger on the spike conveniently attached to the stand. When his blood drips onto the globe, red continents appear. A darker red blob appears about halfway down the U.S. Eastern Seaboard. Gold smiles and whispers, "Bae."
When Emma and the two idiots arrive home, it's morning. Henry pads down the stairs and asks where everyone was all night. At least they had Granny babysitting him. When Snow says that Hook and Rumpy had a fight and someone got hurt, Emma adds, "We weren't sure if Dr. Frankenstein could fix him, but he did." Henry looks up at Emma. "Doctor? Oh, that's who Whale is." Emma says, "Right, but without the neck bolts." Henry gives her the side-eye. "The monster had the neck bolts, not the doctor." Emma gets a mischievous look in her eye and smirks at her mother as she says, "Right, but either way, some of us having known him, it's weird." Snow's voice is quick and clipped as she insists it is not weird. "We're past it. We were cursed." When Henry asks what they're talking about, Charming leans in and says, "Nothing." Henry tries to ask again, but Snow shakes him off. Henry grabs his Once Upon A Time book and brings it back to the counter, as he explains that Frankenstein isn't even in it. "If the curse went to place with other stories, then who knows who else is in this town."
There's a knock on the door. It's Gold. When Emma tells him they've all had a long night, he asks her if she remembers she owes him a favor, because he is cashing it in. When Emma starts to object, he gives her the business about honoring her agreements. By now, Charming is right at his daughter's side. Henry wanders over, too. Gold tells Emma he needs her to help him find someone and they're leaving today. "Pack a bag." Emma asks who they're looking for. Rumpy says, "My son, and it has to be today because every minute I'm here, is a minute closer to me killing Hook. So it's really best for all concerned if I leave, and you're going to come with me." Looking at Charming and then Snow, he adds, "We have a long history, so know this, and know it to be true: If any harm comes to Belle while I'm gone, I'm killing all of you." When Emma holds Henry close, Rumpy tells her, "I'll see you at noon." That was a little excessive, even for him, don't you think? We cut to...
Mendel's hospital room. Greg gets his cell phone out of the bag and places a call. When the person on the other end of the line answers, he tells her he is okay, but was in an accident. Looking over his shoulder, he adds, "Honey, you're not going to believe what I saw." What do you think? Is he a complete mundane, or is he from another book, and somehow ended up transported to somewhere else in our world? If you're on Twitter, please tweet me your (UNSPOILED only) speculation.
I'll be back after the February 10th airing of "Tiny." In the meantime, please grade the episode at the top of the page and then come on over to the forum, where we're cultivating plants, until we achieve a pea fit to lay beneath the mattress of a princess.
See the biggest questions for Season 2 and check out the Downton Abbey cast reimagined as OUAT-style fairy tale characters from our friends at Wetpaint.