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So, it turns out that Rayna Jaymes is sick of doing things like getting stuck in traffic with her mini-van and kids because her young archrival Juliette Barnes is humping a statue in her short shorts while shooting her new music video in the middle of town. Luckily, Watty White has an idea! After being so inspired by Gunnar and Scarlett's performance at the Bluebird, he thinks that Rayna and Deacon should do a duo tour of small venues -- it's intimate, personal, and will make money. Plus, they'll be capitalizing on all their chemistry by singing the love songs they wrote way back when they were actually in love (as opposed to now, when they are not-so-secretly still in love). You know who is not thrilled about this idea? Rayna's husband Teddy, obviously! But Rayna was also not thrilled with his decision to run for mayor, so I guess they're more or less even.
Meanwhile, Juliette is really sad about no one taking her music seriously. Her solution to this problem is to a) stalk Deacon in a number of places (seriously, did she hack his Google calendar?); b) hound him to finish their co-write; c) continually try to give him the sexy times and/or a vintage guitar worth $50,000. Their co-written song is a good one, and it turns out that Juliette might actually have some talent and self-awareness in addition to that vast collection of Daisy Dukes. Also good: the sexytimes, I imagine. Deacon tries to resist, but she pulls the skinnydipping card and it's all over from there. Juliette also pushes him to go on tour with her, sometimes right in front of Rayna. Rayna is most definitely not pleased by this turn of events, and she and Deacon get into some fights old boyfriend-girlfriend style.
In mayoral campaign news, Teddy's handlers are doing a "vulnerability study," designed to dig up any deep, dark secrets before Teddy's opponent can. And though Cole seems like the good, upstanding type, he's mad enough about being double-crossed by Lamar over a difference of opinion around the potential baseball stadium that he promises to give back exactly what he gets. In his vulnerability interview, Teddy talks a bit about his real estate deal gone bad and something having to do with a credit union, all of which lost a lot of people a lot of money. We learn later that the handlers think he wasn't telling the whole truth, and a shady shot of him burning some official-looking papers at the end of the episode (to a soundtrack of your new favorite band Shovels and Rope!) would indicate that they're onto something. Lamar is fine with this, since a mayor with secrets will be easier to control. The "mwah ha ha!" is implied.
Through the vulnerability study we also learn a bit more about Rayna's relationship with Deacon. They were together (TOGETHER together) for 11 years, and she started to see Teddy while they were still technically together (TOGETHER together). It also turns out that Deacon had some serious substance abuse problems. Rayna paid for his rehab, and also married Teddy while he was still inside. It sounds cold, but we do get the impression that Deacon was a George Jones level drunk and thus probably not very fun to be around much of the time. Rayna denies that they've had any sort of romantic relationship in subsequent years.
But THEN. Rayna shows up at one of Deacon's songwriters' nights at the Bluebird (in part because he whined about her never coming) and he invites her up to sing a number. This burns the biscuits of one Juliette Barnes, who is also in the house and was practically standing up when Deacon began to introduce his "special and talented friend" in the audience. Two sexytimes do not, apparently, trump 20 years of both requited and unrequited love. Deacon and Rayna sing an old favorite that's all about how no one will ever love you like I do and, um, yeah. There is some heat. When Deacon holds Rayna's hand after the song, Juliette walks out in a huff. Later, as she and Deacon sit in the same car, Rayna says she wishes they hadn't done that song because, you know, feelings. She manages not to begin an affair while her husband is running for mayor. YET.
And in the obligatory Scarlett and Gunnar subplot, Watty offers to cut them a demo himself if they can get three songs together. We go through an excruciating episode-long round of "will she or won't she" as Scarlett first seems relatively into the idea, then pulls back when her boyfriend Avery hits rejection after rejection, but ultimately decides to go ahead and do it when she sees Rayna and Deacon play at the Bluebird, with all their fame and fans and repressed feelings. True role models, those two!
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Previously: Aging country music superstar Rayna Jaymes wished that she could do it all over again and simultaneously change nothing and everything, thus blowing apart the entire time-space continuum. Throw in a truck and whiskey, and that would make a pretty avant-garde country song. She had to deal with a lot of bullshit, and primary among the dung was the suggestion from her label that she open for chart-topping tart Juliette Barnes. To make matters worse, Juliette put all of her efforts into seducing Rayna's very close ex, Deacon Claybourne, and Rayna's evil father convinced her deadbeat husband to run for mayor. That may sound like a good thing, but it's not. Thankfully, trusty music legend Watty White called Rayna with an idea. Let's hope it's a good one.
We enter with Rayna stuck in a traffic jam while taking her two girls to some sort of uniform-requiring school. She gets a burst of relatively mild road rage, since she's anxious to go see "Uncle Watty" after the drop-off. As a gaggle of pre-teen girls runs by with all sorts of hormone-induced excitement, Rayna's oldest daughter gets a text saying that Juliette Barnes is shooting a video in the middle of town. Thus, the traffic. Juliette WOULD do that shit during morning rush hour. The kids try to get out of the car and join the gaggle, but automatic locks save just a tiny bit of Rayna's dignity. Oldest kid snits that Juliette is the most famous singer in the world, and that little bit of dignity is released to the wind again.
We then cut to Juliette's video, for a song called "Telescope." Of course she's in Daisy Dukes and cowboy boots and a bustier, and is slinking all over a statue. Her backup dancers are also scantily clad, in a very country-fried way. And I know we're supposed to hate Juliette's adolescent crap music, but this song, called "Telescope," is pretty damn catchy. I mean, I decidedly do not hate it. You can understand just a little why all the pre-teen girls are popping their zits with excitement. Juliette's management still has not gotten her a decent hair stylist, though. It's like she's wearing a wig made of stale cotton candy. Rayna drives by and looks sad as Juliette signs countless autographs.
Meanwhile, Juliette walks by just as a part of the video production staff slams her song to the backup dancers. She instructs her manager to fire him immediately, which I think is actually kind of justified. Juliette brats that people think this is all she can do. By "this" I think she means wriggle in hot pants. And, relatedly, make pop music for pre-teens. She asks what's happening with getting Deacon on her tour, and her manager can only say that people have been calling people. Juliette's been doing her part to get Deacon, she says, and her manager better be doing his. I'm guessing "doing my part" for one of them involves an exchange of bodily fluids, and for the other a giant bag of cash emblazoned with dollar signs.
Meanwhile, Rayna is meeting with Watty and her manager, Bucky. I think maybe the crux of her problem is having a manager named "Bucky." In any case, Bucky says that ticket sales for her tour are down, no singles from her album have charted, and telling the head of her record label to kiss her ass for touring with Juliette Barnes basically kills all chances of getting any more support for the record. Thankfully, Watty is ready to reveal his big idea! He mentions seeing Scarlett and Gunnar at the Bluebird open mic, and says he hasn't seen that kind of chemistry since Rayna and Deacon at the beginning of their careers. He thinks that Rayna should get back to her roots by going out on the road -- with just Deacon. Acoustic duo realness! It's clearly a fantastic idea, and Bucky co-signs, saying that if you can't sell out larger venues, booking small places and framing it as "intimate" and "personal" leads to a sold-out tour that actually makes money. And, Watty notes, Rayna can do music she actually cares about. He talks up the love songs that she and Deacon used to write, and Rayna points out that they were so effective because she and Deacon were actually in love back then. You know, as opposed to now, when there are no feelings whatsoever sparking between them whenever they're in the same room together nosiree no feelings there nohows complete neutrality. Rayna doesn't think that they can pull off an onstage pouring out of their hearts out to each other at this point in time. She also can't imagine what Deacon will think of the idea. Happily, Deacon walks in at just that moment asking what he missed.
Cut to Rayna and Teddy getting ready for bed, and Teddy noting that this very plan that has just been discussed will involve Rayna and Deacon sleeping on the same tour bus. I mean, he has a point. She says that this is the same tour they did for years and Teddy adds, "When you were dating." Rayna tells him that that part would be different. Technically. She says that this is important to her, and she needs it. Teddy won't say that he's comfortable when he's not, and Rayna counterpoints that she wasn't exactly comfortable when he decided to run for mayor. Basically, if their marriage is to be saved then both of them should retire. Teddy is pretty stressed about all that he has to deal with in terms of the whole trying-to-be-mayor thing, including a vulnerability study that his campaign consultants want both he and Rayna to do. This is basically to unearth any deep dark secrets that either Teddy or Rayna might have before his rival Coleman can do so. I'm sure neither of them has any of those! Teddy says that it's standard procedure, but Rayna is not thrilled about this invasion into her private life (which may just include some sort of babydaddy scandal which, if unearthed, would lead to the inevitable appearance on Maury). Teddy says that it's important to him, and isn't that enough? Rayna mumbles, "You'd think," I guess because she basically just had the same conversation with him about the tour.
Back at the Bluebird, Watty compliments Scarlett and Gunnar on their open mic performance. He asks how long they've been together, and both of them jump back on the turnip truck for a moment to awkwardly tell him that they're not boyfriend-girlfriend. Watty has to explain that he was really asking how long they've been writing together, and Scarlett goes into her whole thing about how she's not a songwriter but rather a magical woodland creature who sits cross-legged atop a mushroom cap when not taking drink orders at the Bluebird. This does not deter Watty, who says that if they can get three songs together, he'll cut a demo for them himself. Gunnar is appropriately excited, and Watty tells him that he'll get where he's going, but can do it a hell of a lot faster with Scarlett and her cheekbones.
Meanwhile, Juliette begins her episode-long pattern of creepily showing up wherever Deacon is at the time. This time it's at the recording studio, and she starts by telling him that she left him a message, of which he seems fully unaware. Juliette wants to see if he'd like to finish "writing that song," now. In front of everybody in the studio? Deacon can't "finish the song" right now, since he's rehearsing with Rayna. Rayna shows up, and Juliette snits that Deacon was just telling her about their "little tour." You know, the one with acoustic guitars and the great songs that Rayna says will appeal to people who love "actual music." Both ladies do that southern thing where they smile at each other while trading barbs instead of being explicit and trying to rip one another's weaves off. As a Real Housewives fan, it throws me off a little. As Juliette leaves, she tosses a few bonus daggers by flirtatiously telling Deacon that if he changes his mind about joining her tour, the offer still stands. AND, she adds, they have to finish "writing that song." Rayna can't believe Juliette's nerve, and when Deacon tells her that they're just "writing a song," she points out that the two of them used to "write songs" together too. Deacon remembers well. Does everyone in Nashville use "writing that song" as a euphemism for sex? Is the whole town really just one big constant orgy, then?
We cut to Scarlett, heading home to her boyfriend Avery, who's on the phone. She wants to tell him about Watty's offer, but when she sees Avery's face and hears that the manager who was supposed to come see his band tonight bailed, she pulls back. Avery is clearly disappointed, but says that if it was easy to make it in the music business, everybody would be doing it. As he wishes for a break, Scarlett says that she forgot what it was she wanted to talk to him about. Maybe they should go "write a song" to boost everyone's spirits!
Back at the rehearsal space, Rayna and Deacon are packing up and she asks if he got an official offer to join Juliette's tour. He doesn't answer, but his sigh indicates yes. Rayna says it's out of line, and Deacon replies that he's not touring with Juliette, he's touring with Rayna. But lest you think that Juliette is the type who takes an easy no OR who takes a break from stalking people with whom she wants to "write songs," she pulls up in her vintage Chevy truck after Rayna has walked to her car and asks Deacon if he's ready to go "finish their song." Her powers of persuasion are such that Deacon gets right in the truck instead of immediately filing for a restraining order, as he should. From across the parking lot, Rayna sees them drive off and looks disgusted. She's eventually got to drop at least one comment about the fact that Deacon is old enough to be Juliette's dad, right?
We follow the truck down a country road and past a sign that says "no trespassing." As Juliette drives over the grass and parks right to a creek, Deacon points out that they're on private property. That turns out to be no problem, as it's Juliette's private property. She says that Tammy Wynette once owned this land, and even though I suspect that she's more talented than we've been led to believe, that's WAY overshooting. Juliette plans to build a house on this land at some point, so she'll have a place to go and "be herself." Deacon asks who she's trying to be the rest of the time, and Juliette says, "Whatever my manager says will sell the most records." Awww, poor little zillionaire! The struggle, the struggle! Deacon thinks there's nothing wrong with that, and Juliette says there's nothing wrong with wanting more than that either. Well, if she wants people to take her more seriously, she might make a start by not being so mean and skanky all the time.
Juliette opens up her guitar case and Deacon is faced with a 1938 Martin. Wait, does she even PLAY the guitar? What is she doing with that thing other than trying to get in Deacon's pants? Well, maybe that's enough. He handles the guitar gingerly, noodles around a little, and tells her that if she's trying to impress him with the vintage guitar on Tammy Wynette's land, it's working. She says that the guitar is actually for herself, and that he shouldn't be fooled by the shiny exterior -- she's more than meets the eye. When you have to explicitly tell that to someone, maybe you should reconsider the veracity of the statement. Deacon asks Juliette if she's ready to get to it, which she of course thinks means ready to DO IT. There is some smooching, but Deacon wants to write (no quotes) instead of "write." I think having a guy rather touch your guitar than your boobs is one of those "he's just not that into you" moments.
With that, we are at the house of mayoral candidate Coleman Carlisle. Rayna is there apologizing for not honoring her commitment to sing at his campaign announcement. She asks if he can shed some light on what her evil devil dad is up to with his evil evildoings. Coleman explains about the baseball stadium, which Lamar would like to build (and make oodles of money from, I'm guessing) but which Coleman thought was not the best use of the city's money. He said so in a Metro Council meeting, which pissed off Lamar, and thus you have Mayor Teddy. Rayna can't believe that, after all these years, their families are caught up in a political rivalry. Cole says that Lamar is starting to treat him like family, which, you may have gathered, is not necessarily a good thing. They end with talk about Teddy's fundraiser that night, which Rayna looks none too happy to have to attend.
Back at the Bluebird, Gunnar probes Scarlett for whether she's thought about Watty's offer, and also whether she'd like to sometime hang out outside of work. He does so in the most awkward manner possible, because that's all part of his charm. Scarlett then invites him to see Avery's band perform, which is not exaaaaactly what Gunnar had in mind.
And then we're at Teddy's fundraiser. Rayna of course looks beautiful, and gets to give Teddy a quick kiss before her sister hauls him off, doubtlessly to talk to some bigwig. She's then faced with a group of polished southern ladies of roughly her age, one of whom starts complaining about the traffic yesterday that was caused by some girl she's never heard of. The other two start gushing about Juliette, which leads Rayna to introduce herself and shake the hand of the first woman. All of these ladies are big fans of Rayna -- so big that the third one says that she should put out another album. This leads Rayna to explain that it's already out, and she finally excuses herself when one of the women asks if it's sold at Starbucks. How did we suddenly morph into an episode of GCB? Things go from bad to worse when Lamar catches Rayna and starts hissing in her ear. We learn that Cole more or less grew up with Rayna and her sister, and that Rayna thinks they all owe him an apology. She asks about the vulnerability study, which Lamar says is "insurance that our past transgressions won't become our undoing." He then harasses her for a while about having something to hide, and honestly never looks happier than when he's making her miserable. Rayna heads off to try to find somebody at the party who is not horrific.
We then cut to Deacon and Juliette co-writing. No ironic quotes! The song that they're working on is quite lovely, and though it seems like Deacon is doing all the heavy lifting at first, it turns out that Juliette actually can write. She adds the refrain, which has to do with how much harder it is to shine than to undermine. I guess that one comes directly out of personal experience. The song is so pretty, but undone a bit by her whiny voice. Why is it that she sounds so good on her supposedly crappy songs, and so annoying on this actually good song? The show is trying to keep us guessing, maybe? In any case, go enjoy the song as sung by its actual writers here. Once the song is finished, a mildly shocked Deacon says that she's really good at this. If he's that surprised, says Juliette, it's not much of a compliment. Oh God, get over your complex already! Everyone thinks that you suck in part because you suck! Juliette once again tries to put the soft sell on Deacon to come on tour with her, and he reiterates that he's going on tour with Rayna. She says that they're like an old married couple, but with all of the hassle and none of the benefits. Something tells me that Deacon is already aware of this. Juliette tells Deacon to focus on the present, and what his future holds. Like, her boobs. As she strips down and jumps in the water, Deacon calls himself a dead man.
We are then with Teddy and his campaign advisors, in the midst of his interview for the vulnerability study. The advisors note that Rayna is on the road a lot, and Teddy admits that it gets lonely for him and the girls. He denies ever having a girlfriend, or enjoying the services of hookers. And then it's time to talk about Teddy's real estate business. So, in 2007, Teddy's investment group purchased a $75 million tract of land along the Cumberland River, for a project called Cumberland Plaza Development. Teddy also served two terms on the board of the Music City Credit Union, which had a substantial investment in that project. Though Teddy says this isn't unusual, one of the advisors notes that he resigned from the board just before the Cumberland deal fell apart. Teddy insists that his resignation from the credit union had nothing to do with the Cumberland deal falling through. I don't understand why any of this is suspicious or problematic, which could be because I'm so bored by the conversation. Teddy needs a more accessible financial scandal!
Soon enough, we cut to Avery and his band playing at The Five Spot. And I know that all the other music dudes made fun of him for being such a hack last week, but Avery gets the last laugh because the song he's singing was written by Elvis Costello. I think his real problem is that he needs to move to Austin. Scarlett is really into the show, and less into it when another woman in the audience tries to hit on Avery. Avery in turn is not at all into learning from the same woman that she saw Scarlett and Gunnar (who is in attendance and apparently not enjoying himself all that much) perform at the Bluebird. He and Scarlett talk later, and he asks if writing with Gunnar means "writing" with Gunnar. He got the memo about this "writing a song" thing! Scarlett is absolutely shocked by this question, because when you live under a gerbera daisy in the forest nothing so scandalous ever crosses anybody's mind. Scarlett explains that Gunnar put one of her old poems to music, and she felt so silly when he dragged her onstage, and then "the Watty thing happened." Finally Scarlett has to admit that Watty offered to record their demo, and even though she tries to downplay its significance Avery knows better. He gives her a half-hearted "congratulations" as he goes to load the van, and Scarlett has only her ratty and poorly integrated hair extensions to comfort her.
Cut to Coleman confronting Lamar, apparently in Lamar's house. His office looks like it's right out of Clue. If I were Cole, I'd check for candlesticks before entering. Both Cole and his wife don't understand why Lamar is trying to sabotage Cole's shot at being mayor, and Lamar hisses out something about being disappointed to learn that he can't trust Cole. Cole notes that a difference of opinion does not necessarily lead to a loss of trust. Lamar has a difference of opinion on that particular matter. Cole has been with Lamar for ten years, and says that Lamar never believes himself to be wrong. If anyone finds evidence to the contrary, he says, they'd better watch their back. Lamar is basically like, "Yep." Cole says that loyalty is a one-way street with Lamar, and adds that whatever Lamar gives, he's going to get back. I hope Maddie is ready to meet her biological dad! Lamar has less of a "mwah ha ha!" face than usual, which leads me to believe he's concerned about this just a little bit.
Meanwhile, as Rayna, Deacon and Bucky have a friendly meeting, a courier comes in to deliver a guitar case with a bow on it. It's for Deacon, from Juliette, and the courier recommends insuring it for $50,000 as soon as possible. Rayna asks, "What. The hell. Is that." Poor Deacon can only stand there and look nervous. After Bucky leaves, he explains to Rayna that sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. Yeaaaaaaah, but this is not one of those times! Rayna wonders if it's a bribe to come on the tour. The answer to that is sort of a, "Yes PLUS." Deacon doesn't know what Juliette is thinking, and Rayna doesn't know what Deacon is thinking. He doesn't understand what the big deal is about co-writing one song with Juliette. Rayna gets quite agitated as she says that they're doing a show they haven't done in 15 years, and she needs him there with her, working on their songs. Deacon says that he's there, working, but Rayna yells that in fact he's running around with "Miss SparklyPants." More accurate: Miss NoPants. Rayna yells again that she's trying to figure out if they can even do these songs without completely humiliating themselves, and Deacon gets quite mad as he yells back that he plays these songs every third Thursday at the Bluebird. And Rayna would know that if she'd ever bothered to show up once in the last ten years. Ooooh, burn. Rayna yells (so much yelling!) that Deacon dare not act like she's not been there for him. And then she's not there for him, because she leaves in a huff. After she's gone Deacon shouts that if he wanted to fight like this, he'd have a damn girlfriend. Well, but couples fights are always about who left crumbs on the counter and which way the toilet paper roll should go and stuff. This one is actually much more exciting.
And then we are at Juliette's house. She would have angel wings on her wall. She is quite upset as she looks at her phone and asks her manager who gets a $50,000 guitar and doesn't even say thank you. I guess the answer to that is: Deacon. The manager tries his best to ignore her, then shows her the rough cut of her video. He's excited about it, but Juliette hates it. She's written one good song, so is a real artist now, I guess. Also, she's obsessed with Deacon and thinks that songs like this mean that he'll never join her band or take her seriously. The manager tells her to worry less about Deacon and more about the teenager girls who are her meal ticket and who will eat it up. Juliette kicks him out, and her shifty eyes indicate that her little brain is starting to scheme.
We then cut to Rayna returning home to find Teddy and the campaign advisors waiting to study her vulnerability. This scene is interspersed with shots of Juliette whining her way through her and Deacon's song in her home recording studio. How she got a full background track for the song already we do not yet know. The really interesting part, though, is all the dirt we learn about Rayna and Deacon's relationship. They were together for 11 years when she was starting out. One of the advisors asks if Rayna started seeing Teddy while she was still involved with Deacon, and Rayna says it was more like "entangled." Deacon had some "personal problems," and so Rayna started to date Teddy. The advisor asks when Rayna ended her relationship with Deacon. She says that she didn't -- he's still in her band, after all. But they just "shifted gears." As for the romantic relationship, Rayna ended that when Deacon went into rehab, which Rayna paid for. I think that's the kind of "being there" that Rayna was referring to in their last scene. He had some sort of substance abuse issue, serious enough that Rayna says if he had not gone to rehab, he wouldn't be with them today. The advisor asks if Rayna continued her romantic involvement with Deacon while he was in rehab. She says no, with only the slightest of pauses, then adds that it became clear to her that Deacon was not... something. Good father material, perhaps? She trails off before she can end that thought and says that she was involved with Teddy, and they got married. While Deacon was in rehab! Well when you put it like that, vulnerability study guys, it sounds so scandalous! One of the advisors asks if Rayna has had any involvement with Deacon in the intervening years between then and now, and she says absolutely not before ending the interview. A little sensitive, are we? I can't imagine why.
In equally scandalous adventures, Scarlett goes to see Gunnar and his honky tonk band playing at a sad little motel bar. The band is great, though, with an upright bass and fiddle and cowboy hats. They should be happy that Scarlett showed up, since she's the only one of the four or five patrons who bothers to clap when their number is over. Gunnar and Scarlett go sit by the motel pool, and flirt about the fact that he's wearing fringe. Soon, though, Scarlett gets to the point of her visit -- she can't do the demo with Watty. She wants to, of course, but can't. She moved to Nashville to be with Avery, and doesn't want to do anything -- like display her natural talents or achieve any measure of success -- that will mess that up. Gunnar is way nicer to her than I would be in the same situation, and eventually tells her to forget both him and Avery. He asks what she wants. Gunnar, for one, wants to do more than run a soundboard and play for three drunk people at a seedy motel. He assumes that Scarlett wants to be more than a waitress and a girlfriend, which I wouldn't necessarily bank on. Gunner clearly thinks that Avery is the problem, but Scarlett says that he will support her in whatever she does. Yes, but I'd say he may not support her gladly or without seething jealousy, which is likely the crux of her dilemma. But, like, don't be such a dumb-ass! Do the demo!
Back at Vulnerabilty Study Manse, Rayna is exhausted. Teddy kind of half-apologizes for not asking Rayna what she thought about him running for mayor, and says he knows she's not on board. She clarifies that she's not on board with the campaign, but is on board with Teddy being happy again. Because she's stood by him and supported him through a situation that she's not particularly happy about, Teddy wants to do the same thing for her. He's a lot more likeable in this episode, right? I might even feel a little bad for him during the inevitable rekindling of the Rayna/Deacon romance!
Speaking of Deacon, Juliette is still stalking him, and manages to show up in her convertible just as he's walking out his front door. He never should have given her his address! Invest in a PO Box, people. It's for your own safety. Juliette has brought him a copy of her home demo of their song. Ever heard of email attachments? If he likes it, Juliette says, she'd like to record it. She'd also like to get some thanks for the freaking $50,000 guitar she gave him. Deacon says that he likes the guitar, but can't take it. She wants him to, though, and play it on their co-written track. Plus, I'm guessing, she doesn't even know how to play it. And then, because she's committed to every possible method of being annoying, Juliette tells Deacon that something about him makes her want to grow up. Gee, maybe it's the 25-year age difference? She drives off, but I'm sure it won't be long before she's broken back in the house and is boiling his bunny. That is NOT a euphemism.
Meanwhile, Lamar is getting the results of the vulnerability study. The only area of real concern that the advisors have is around the Cumberland Plaza deal. They note that Teddy did not seem 100% forthcoming on that matter. Tandy says that the deal wiped him out, and another advisor points out that it also bankrupted a lot of good people. The main advisor would lay 5 to 1 odds that there's something fishy in the whole mess, and Lamar finds it encouraging that Teddy at least had the good sense not to tell them about it. Additionally, he says, a mayor with secrets is easier to control. Maybe he should have a button to push that releases a full stereo "Mwah ha ha!" so he doesn't have to strain his vocal cords? And then we cut to Teddy, who is burning some very suspicious looking papers in his fireplace, to the tune of one of my favorite bands (and hopefully soon yours!) Shovels and Rope! I got so excited to hear their song in a big network show that I forgot to be concerned about Teddy's dirty dealings. Real estate credit union blah blah scandal finances!
We then head to the Bluebird, where Deacon is playing with his band. It must be the third Wednesday of the month! Juliette is in the audience, bopping along with her hair finally looking decent. Watty is in there as well, and soon Rayna walks in. This gives Deacon a little extra peppy boost, and he announces that he has a very special, talented friend in the audience that he'd like to have come up and do a number. Juliette is THRILLED about this development and is writing "Mrs. Juliette Claybourne" surrounded by hearts on her metaphorical notebook, until Deacon says the words, "Please put your hands together for Miss Rayna James." This show clearly believes in karma.
Rayna is of course super cute on stage, and Deacon introduces the song as one that they first performed at the Bluebird about twenty years ago. Rayna jokes that that's impossible, since she was in preschool 20 years ago. The funny part about that is that Juliette probably was too young for preschool 20 years ago. But while her age was an advantage before, it is doing her no favors in the face of history and nostalgia. The band starts the opening chords of the song, which get a big response from the crowd. Interestingly enough, it does not sound like a country song AT ALL. What it DOES sound like, however, is foreplay. The chorus is all about how no one will ever love you like I do, and Deacon and Rayna hold each others' gazes as they trade verses. My big furry Maine Coon cat misheard the lyrics to this song as "No one will ever fluff you like I do," which led to a very awkward conversation between us about why this is inappropriate to sing in public. Meanwhile, in the audience, Juliette has a sad. She still can't help mouthing along with the lyrics, though. Everyone in the audience is very moved and stuff, and so we're just going to play along and suspend disbelief about the singing. Watty looks back at Scarlett and Gunnar, then points to Rayna and Deacon on stage. This is enough for Scarlett to turn to Gunnar and say, "Okay, let's do it." This song makes everyone horny for everything! Especially Deacon and Rayna, for each other. They finish the song to great applause, and then he puts his hands on hers, gets a shit eating grin, and licks his lips A LOT. With tears in her eyes, Juliette leaves.
Later in the parking lot, Deacon and Rayna sit together in his car and she wishes that they hadn't done that song. Because: feelings. They both avoid looking at each other, and Deacon asks what they're going to do now. IT, obviously. But not tonight. Rayna gets out of the car as Deacon gets a very sad, complicated look. When Rayna gets home, she hugs Teddy -- some may say guiltily! -- and with tears in her eyes says that she loves him. Put that in your vulnerability study and analyze it!
week: Meth mom! Also, Rayna says it's about time for her to let Deacon go, not realizing he's already gone...back to Juliette's bed.
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