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Good Lord, so much to cover. It's March 1967, and billings are high, but Joan, keeping Lane's memory alive, advocates some amount of fiscal conservatism even as she gets them another floor in the building, so that PHANTOM second floor people referenced at the beginning of Season Four will now actually exist. She also lets Don know that their insurance policy, so cleverly referenced by Pete earlier in the season, has left them $175K to the good in the wake of Lane's death, so Don decides to take fifty of that to give to Rebecca as repayment of Lane's investment in the company. Rebecca, however, is unimpressed, and turns Don out of her apartment with some harsh and unforgiving words. That incident barely makes the top ten among ways in which Don is having a shitty episode, but we'll come back to that.
Pete runs into Howard and Beth on the train, and soon after, Beth calls Pete and invites him to a hotel, wherein she tells him that to combat her depression, Howard is sending her in for electroshock therapy, not for the first time, apparently. Pete is enraged by Howard doing this to Beth and gets into it physically with him the time he sees him, which results in Pete getting punched by two people within the space of a minute, and wherever he is, I hope Lane is telling whoever will listen that he got there first. But the result of Pete's mangled face is that Trudy lets him get that apartment in the city, which probably will mean he can avoid further train awkwardness with Howard, at least.
So, back to Don. He's feeling a lot of pain both physical and emotional, in the form of a horrible toothache he tries to convince himself will go away and images of his brother Adam, who, as I reminded you last time, also hanged himself thanks to Don. So when Megan, selling out a friend in the process, asks Don to set her up with a commercial audition on one of his accounts, it's surprising he doesn't make her sign a paper promising she won't kill herself before telling her she doesn't want to get ahead this way. Knowing that her acting career is foundering, Megan gets wasted and cries to Don, and Marie, who's down to visit Megan and fool around with Roger, later essentially tells Don that Megan isn't talented and will be his doting wife as soon as her dreams are dashed. Don: "Thanks?"
Somewhat at a loss, Don runs into Peggy in a movie theater, and after he learns she's doing great and is in charge of Phillip Morris's new women's cigarette, she obliviously suggests Don give her love to Megan, and Don tells her he's happy for her success, but never thought it would happen without him. Possibly spurred by Peggy's uncomplicated feelings toward his wife, or possibly not wanting to lose someone else he cares about due to inattentiveness, Don watches a screen test Megan commissioned and is enchanted by her all over again, and ends up helping her, resulting in her landing the part. But I think it's fair to say, given how we end up, that he doesn't feel good about it.
In the end, Joan takes the partners to see their new floor, which is raw and waiting to be shaped by the five of them into something new. After a montage of Peggy in Richmond, Pete looking terribly unhappy, and Roger nude and on acid, Don walks off Megan's commercial set and orders his trusty old Old Fashioned as "You Only Live Twice" plays. A pretty girl asks if he's alone, he looks at her inscrutably… and we're out of Season Five. Well, except for the full recap, which I expect is going to be a doozy.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!In his bathroom, Don takes a cotton ball and soaks it in what's probably whiskey before sticking it in his mouth over a particular tooth. From the not-in-a-good-way he rolls his eyes back in his head, he appears to be in some pain and having had oral surgery myself, I will not be the one to make fun of him.
Megan re-enters the apartment from picking up a couple things and we learn JULIA ORMOND is back. Megan tells Marie she'll make breakfast, but Marie offhandedly comments in French that her coffee is too weak and, by the way, "your husband" hasn't left. Megan calls to Don that he's going to be late before opening a letter that apparently doesn't contain good news, but when Don finally emerges she hides the piece of paper -- an act not lost on her mother, who asks Don if he'd like an omelette. Don sighs that he'd better not and the fact that Don's tooth is so bad he can't even handle an egg understandably gets Megan worried, but Don tells her the pain will go away. "It always does." Okay, I know I said I wouldn't make fun of him, but if he's being that stubborn about going to a dentist I may have to reconsider. Of course, Megan does a fair job herself by commenting that he should "go easy on the mouthwash" when she tastes the liquor on Don's breath. As he's leaving, Marie tells Megan that she shouldn't keep things from her husband. I'm not convinced Don's even quite out the door, but I'm thinking the chances he dropped the French lessons are pretty good. Marie inspects the letter, which apologizes for there being no response to Megan's reel and encourages her to try some advanced film workshop they just happen to offer. Working in the entertainment industry, I do sympathize when Megan explains that she paid for a screen test and the company was supposed to take it and send it to agents, but given that it's only been a week since she went in for it, they obviously didn't do squat and are now just trying to jack her for some more money. Marie offers in English that it's a great sin to take advantage of "hopeless" people and although at Megan's umbrage she backpedals and claims in French that she meant to take advantage of people's hopes, I don't think Freud would buy the language barrier as an excuse.
On the morning train, Pete is surprised to look up and see Howard with Beth, who "recalls" that they "almost had dinner." Howard references a second honeymoon that Pete and Trudy apparently took or that Pete said they were taking, but Pete ignores him in favor of asking Beth where she's off to. There's a pause long enough to indicate shenanigans before Howard explains that Beth is going to stay with her sister for a bit and I was trying to figure it out because if they were separating it hardly seems likely that they'd be traveling together, but I wasn't expecting the worst part of this episode to come from these two. Pete pointedly asks where that might be, but this time it's Beth who declines to answer, instead saying that she's going to the smoking car. She quickly makes her way out despite Howard's protests that they'll have to stand (guess most people don't appreciate Metro-North's progressive policy) and when she's gone, Howard tells Pete not to take it personally, that Beth is in a mood and I WONDER WHY THAT MIGHT BE. As Howard leaves, Pete notices a scarf of Beth's sticking out of one of the suitcases Howard's schlepping and takes a quick feel of it, and I'm going to have to quote Estelle Costanza: What can be gained by feeling a person's material?
Harry joins Joan on the elevator and notices that she pushed the button for the thirty-eighth floor. Joan reaches to correct the "error" but Harry -- knowing that the only mistakes Joan ever makes have to do with men -- offers that he heard the parachute company upstairs got a big government contract "and moved to Washington to be closer to the cemetery or something." It's a terrible sentiment until you start thinking about Greg, but Joan doesn't let herself be distracted by thoughts of her ex-husband as she tells Harry to mind his own business "for once." Harry, of course, ignores her and takes the opportunity to lobby for a better office and after some allusion to the idea that neither of them wanted to move into Lane's space, they arrive at the thirty-eighth seventh floor, with Harry telling her he needs a window. "I'm getting scurvy." Heh. Don appears from another car and then looks back at a red-haired man getting on and asks, "Adam?" The man returns his gaze and it is in fact Jay Paulson, the actor that played Adam Whitman. "Adam" wordlessly looks away...
...and then we cut to someone who does not know the meaning of "wordless," Ginzo, who's pitching Topaz on a new concept that while their product is less expensive, "it's never cheap." The lead guy, however, hates it, saying he explicitly didn't want the word "cheap" in the copy even if it's being disclaimed, leading to a fairly heated bit from Ginzo that sends Ken to the window to knock urgently for Don to get in there. While Don pops some aspirin -- probably for the forthcoming headache as much as the current toothache -- Ken tries to keep the situation from devolving and then Don joins them and pretty clearly looks like he's reading the copy for the first time as he wonders what the problem is. The lead guy (remember they all had some serious Noo Yawk accents), however, thinks that the word "cheap" shouldn't come near any kind of fantasy scenario, which is what they're selling and adds that they should have gotten a girl's opinion. "I used to take that as a given around here." Of course, you recall that Peggy brought this account in (also referenced in the timeless "That's bullshit" scene), so it's nice to see her absence strongly felt. The meeting breaks up and as soon as Ken has led the Topaz people out, Don drops the winsome smile and wonders why the hell Ginzo didn't have any research done. Ginzo fires back that they never had to with this client before and Stan adds that they like it and the client doesn't, so that's how they know it's good. Don sarcastically notes that it's a success then, but Ginzo is too worked up to be anything other than a mini-freight train of straightforwardness: "I consider it a success that you didn't have to go a single day without telling me I'm an idiot!" Aside from the obvious point I already made about their work suffering without Peggy, it's also nice to know that without her around, Don has been taking things out on Ginzo. Still think he's "such a decent guy," Michael? Don grimaces and leaves without another word, whereupon Stan remarks exhaustedly, "I'm so bored of this dynamic." HA! They may not have given you much to do this season Stan, but I've loved having you around all the same.
Pete gets a buzz that his sister-in-law (first, why haven't we seen HER yet and second, her name is "Judy"! Judy and Trudy, it explains so much!) is on the phone, but when he picks up he's unpleasantly surprised to learn that it's Beth, who tells him she needs to see him. He's annoyed, but gets on the intercom to send Clara down to the lobby for some Life Savers ("I want them fresh!" he snaps when she asks what's wrong with the ones in the machine) and then returns to snit that he guesses Beth suddenly remembered who he is thanks to their little meeting on the train. She tells him she'll be at the Hotel Pennsylvania under the name "Mrs. Campbell" and I'm ninety-nine percent sure Pete wouldn't have been dumb enough to book a place he and Trudy have stayed before. Ninety-nine percent. Pete childishly tells her he hopes she likes waiting, since that's what he did, as if she didn't tell him in all the ways English allows that she wasn't coming. She tells him this may be their last chance, but instead of trying to parse the cryptic statement, he slams the phone down. And it's cute the way he's trying to act like the chances of him going aren't greater than say, ninety-nine percent.
Peggy, her suit and office indicative of her new compensation level, is positively barking at two male underlings about some copy for Ajax when Chaough interrupts and asks the boys to clear out for a moment. Instead of chastising her for her rough (albeit possibly deserved) treatment of her staff though, he asks if she smokes and when she tries to tell him not really, he replies, "Get started." Heh. He tosses her a carton of what he calls "Phillip Morris's top-secret ladies' cigarette" going on to add that Leo Burnett thinks the account is too small, so now it's in review. "And it's your job to make sure they're sorry." Peggy's like, awesome, so Chaough has some dude wheel in three boxes full of research and tells her to go through it at her leisure and then get her underlings on it. Her face falling a bit at the dissertation-like amount of reading in front of her, Peggy asks Chaough if they told him anything she should know and he takes the long way to answer her, asking if her boyfriend lights her cigarettes. She weakly reiterates that she doesn't smoke, but he demurs and then tells her the concept has to make noise. "Maybe she lights it herself." He adds, "You're a woman and you smoke. What do you want?" I could write quite a bit about the implications of this scene, but I'm going to do the short version and save the rest for later: Remember Peggy drunkenly telling Dawn that she wasn't sure if she could act like a man, which she was equating with being a boss? That she wasn't sure she wanted to? This episode is where she leaves those doubts behind by realizing that she can be a woman and still be the boss and this business is indicative of that. Bobbie Barrett would be so proud.
Also, I'm horrible at noticing specific set design items, but I love the framed poster on her wall of the "2nd New York Film Festival." How hip it must have seemed then!
Joan -- her glasses-on-a-chain emphasizing her increased station even as the pen dangling between her boobs lets us not forget her other attributes -- is informing the partners that all work from the year has posted (we'll learn that it's late March, with Easter upon us and don't think the proximity to Jesus's death and rebirth is a coincidence) and now that Mohawk is returning to its pre-strike billings, revenues are up thirty-four percent from the year making it their best quarter ever. You can, I suppose, forgive Don for being crabby despite this news, given that he's using his drink to ice his tooth, but that is possibly just another indication that he should GO TO THE DAMN DENTIST ALREADY. Bertram is much happier, but does ask if she found him an office and Joan informs them about Harry thwarting her errand that morning (wonder if Scarlett is putting that in the minutes), but says she's meeting with the building manager at lunch. Roger pipes up that she should get more space than they need, to which Joan asks if there are any objections. She's met with silence, but a close-up of an empty chair representing Lane clues us in to her thoughts, so she answers her own question, saying that she feels someone at least has to make mention of the negatives and wonders whether after only one great quarter they should take care not to overextend themselves. Pete, his impatience letting us know that noon is approaching, asks if they can just vote already, but Joan offers that they could also simply table the discussion until June. At Scarlett's prompting, the partners vote in favor of tabling, but Joan testily informs them that tabling only needs to be seconded and I'd expect at least Bertram to know that but it's no surprise that Pete mutters, "What is this, Parliament?" When Joan's running things, Pete? DAMN STRAIGHT and I know from Twitter that I was not nearly the only one for whom Joan sticking up for proper parliamentary procedure was a highlight. Don blearily asks if the meeting is over, but Joan acidly tells him it isn't; however, Pete gets up and tells Don he's giving him his proxy and leaves and look who knows a little something about parliamentary procedure when it benefits him. Don: "We can do that?" Leave it to Pete Campbell to open THAT can of worms.
Beth is lying on the bed of her hotel room with the TV on and a drink in hand when there's a knock on the door. She unsteadily opens up and lets Pete in with an enthusiastic hug, but he's determined to be grumpy for a while and leaves his overcoat on like he might take off at any minute and while he might not remove the thing during this visit the pants are for sure coming down at some point. Knowing that their time is limited, however, Beth gets to the point: She's not going to her sister's. Instead, Howard's checked her into the hospital and given how severely depressed she's been, the doctors feel that the best "therapy" for her is electroshock. Look, you don't need me to discuss the barbarism of the treatment when Requiem For A Dream is available, so let's move on to the real point: After explaining that she told the doctor she needed to go to her niece's birthday party, Beth goes on that she wanted to see Pete now because her memory will be compromised by the procedure. "It always is." The information is coming at Pete almost too fast to handle as he disbelievingly asks if she's done it before and she admits it, telling him it "creates this sort of grey cloud" and the last time she lost months. She takes his hand and tells him he's wonderful, making me think her memory loss is getting a head start and tells him she has to be back at the hospital by five, so would he please do this so there's a better chance she won't forget? He's aghast, but when she stares into his eyes and asks him to please give her this, he regards her for a long moment and then kisses her. They break apart for a moment, but he moans in ecstasy and gets on top of her without, I'll point out, the overcoat coming off.
A tall blonde friend of Megan's is reading Backstage and complaining that everyone currently wants redheads. "I mean, even Juliet's working!" Heh. Megan, however, sardonically points out that Juliet did three days on Dark Shadows before getting fired and cut out and the blonde replies, "Shit. I keep telling her how good she was!" HA! This girl can stay. Referring to the phone that's been ringing for a while, the blonde tells Megan she can't work if she won't answer, but when Megan complies we see the reason for her reticence, as after a moment she snits, "I can hear you," and hangs up. There was a time in this season where that would have made be wonder what was happening; they certainly dropped that civil-unrest/crime-spree backdrop pretty thoroughly, huh? Megan tells her friend whoever it is keeps calling, but before they can discuss further, Marie appears and mildly chides Megan that if she'd known they had company, she wouldn't have come out "like this." I mean, maybe there are a couple of strands of hair out of place; it's hard to tell on JULIA ORMOND, obvs. Emily (that's the blonde's name, as Megan tells Marie) apparently feels the same way, given the way she's enthralled by Marie's luminescence; after Marie confirms that Megan got her a hair appointment, Emily asks how long she's in town and Marie replies that it's only for a week as she wanted to spend Easter with Megan. "My husband is an atheist." Well, given all his other beliefs, he kind of has to be. Upon learning that they're looking at casting notices, Marie wishes them good luck in French and whether it's the offhand tone or the fact that she didn't say "Break a leg," it's no wonder that when Emily enthuses that Marie is so "encouraging," Megan is slow to agree. Emily then sits and asks Megan for a favor -- her agent put her up for a commercial part based on Beauty And The Beast and it's for Butler Shoes (Emily gets the name wrong to start), an SCDP client. She does mention the agency's full name, so it looks like Lane's surname is living on at the firm, at least for now. Emily says she'd be so grateful, and while Megan tells her that's not the way it works -- it's really up to the client -- Emily replies that she just wants an audition and Megan reluctantly agrees. Emily kisses Megan in gratitude, but I'm guessing it would be more of a Sopranos-type kiss if she knew how this was going to shake out.
Pete and Beth are in bed, and you'll be glad (I... guess?) to know the overcoat came off sometime between the last scene and now. He's got his eyes closed, but after Beth stares at him with a smile on her face for a bit, she tells him she should go as Howard's coming by after work. Pete, awake after all, lightly suggests what she should tells him -- "I couldn't find the party, then I couldn't get a cab," and forgetting the offensiveness of the ditzy-woman impression, maybe levity in general isn't exactly called for here? Pete tries to hold her in bed, breathing that she must feel better now and when Beth sits up and starts getting dressed, Pete breathes that Howard wants to control Beth and he's a monster. But Beth is willing to own her depression: "It's so dark, Peter. I just get to this place and I suddenly feel this door open. And I want to walk through it." Pete sniffs that such a final solution is for weak people, "people who can't solve a problem," and he's got to have Lane on his mind here, but I don't think he's understanding the idea that it's not always not being able to solve problems but the feeling that doing so is meaningless. He will, though. He pulls her back down and asks what will happen if she forgets she loves him, but she points out that they don't even know each other. "We just happen to have the same problem." He offers that that's only because they're apart and she breathes, "Oh. Then I was wrong." I guess she thought Pete was severely depressed too, and I'm not saying she's mistaken either. She adds that she really should go and when he asks why, she simply replies, "Because it works." He does prevail upon her to stay for five more minutes and she holds his wrist in her hand as we go to commercial.
Megan and Marie are sipping some wine and flipping through magazines, Marie showing off her freshly-done hair, when Don arrives home. Marie is happy to hear that he's feeling better, but adds, "Just in case, I made soup." Heh. Don goes to change for dinner and Megan follows him to ask if he's really feeling better; he swears that he is, but the scrunchy faces he makes before he sees her belie that thought. Megan screws up her courage and tells Don about Emily mentioning the commercial, and before we go on I'll say that it's interesting Don hadn't even told Megan about it before -- it shows how far out of the SCDP loop she's become. Megan stammers about how she hears it's for a European-type girl and she'd be mad at herself if she didn't ask, "and I wouldn't ask if I didn't think I'd be right for it, but I really am." Whoa. Whoa! Did Megan just completely sell her friend out there? I think she did! Maybe she has what it takes to be an actress after all! It takes a moment for Megan's words to penetrate Don's haze of tooth pain and when he turns somewhat uncomprehendingly, she sits down and tells him she only wants him to put her name in a pile, and she'll submit herself as Megan Calvet, and she just so happens to have something that shows how she looks on film. Don is surprised that she'd want to be in a commercial and goes on, "I thought you hated advertising." Megan saves me the trouble of disputing that. Whatever pain Don is in, however, doesn't seem to affect his ability to be condescending when the mood strikes him, as he tells her commercials aren't art, "and you're an artist, aren't you?" I guess we're past the point where we can pretend to be surprised at Don's disingenuousness about what's involved in pursuing an acting career, so Megan -- after wondering if he's mad at her -- tells him that all her friends would kill for a national commercial. I mean, at what they pay, I'd kill for one and I'm not even an actor.
But Don tells her she doesn't need money, which is hardly the only benefit a national commercial would afford her and in a hurt voice, she asks him if he knows how hard it was for her to ask him. I'm assuming she's leaving any guilt she felt at screwing her friend over out of it. Don at least makes a more relevant point in saying that it would be equally hard for him to ask the client to hire his wife, especially since Ken, Stan and Ginzo will be there on set, and then he grimaces in pain, which I suppose you could take as his tooth editorializing about those three. Hey, Don's tooth, I'd happily watch a spin-off of the three of them. After some more obligatory discussion of dentist visits, Megan limply tells him to forget she brought it up -- "it's just been so hard." As the phone rings, Don lets go his anger as well and says he does know, but assures her that she doesn't want it this way and I'm not necessarily disagreeing, but he certainly had no problem with, say, MAKING HER A COPYWRITER. Nevertheless, she reluctantly agrees and then Don answers the phone. After a pause, a man asks for Marie in a stilted French accent, but Don assumes its Emile, even though we see that it's Roger. Ha! There's your explanation for all the hang-ups; even Roger wasn't dumb enough to think he could pass that off as a real French accent to a native speaker. Don continues to crack me up by telling Megan that he thinks Emile is drunk and Megan scoffs but does go to the other room to give her mother the news. After Marie has picked up and Don has gotten off the call, Roger confesses his identity, and Marie goes with it, asking in French how the conference in Regina was, for Megan's benefit. Roger's befuddled, but Marie has a plan, going on that yes, they can talk since Megan's in the other room and Megan picks up the cue and heads back into the bedroom as Roger wonders, "What is Regina?" Hee.
Megan hands Don a drink, for which he thanks her and then apologizes that he would help her if he could. She smiles tightly and says she's going to take a bath before dinner, but as soon as the door's closed and the water's running, she breaks down into sobs...
...while Marie is asking how Roger knew she was there. Roger: "Because Don was complaining you were drinking all his liquor." Marie, God love her, just laughs musically before they enter into a little verbal dance that ends in her promising to try to visit him at the Stanhope, his current temporary residence, "on the condition that you lower your expectations." In other words, chance of blowjob? Slim.
Don's resting his eyes and tooth, still on the bed, as the water continuing to run suggests that Megan is letting more frustrations out than have to do with this one commercial. And given the ghosts of Lane and Adam swirling around, shouldn't he, like, check on her?
Oh, speaking of which, when Don walks through SCDP the day, which is bustling with far more employees than we've ever seen, he sees Adam again and I think we've all made the connection at this point? When he reaches Dawn, he requests some ice and she goes to get it for him, but not before informing him that Joan has been waiting inside to see him for some time. He enters and after the morning greetings, she tells him she'd like to reopen the conversation about more space -- you see, she's been trying very hard to be responsible and careful on behalf of the company, yet the money keeps pouring in. She hands over a check to Don, whose eyes go wide and the only time I've ever seen that is when Roger told him how much he stood to make from the PPL merger, so you know this is no chump change we're dealing with. And indeed, Joan tells him that it's the benefit from the company's insurance policy in compensation for Lane's death (and they did work in not only the company being the beneficiary but also the fact that it covered suicide to one of Pete's storylines earlier in the season), to the tune of one hundred and seventy-five thousand dollars. Recovered from the number of figures on the check, Don wonders what Joan's question is, so she simply asks why Lane did what he did, going on that she can't help thinking about what she could have done to stop him. "Why didn't I give him what he wanted?" Don doesn't get what that might have been at first, but Joan meets his gaze pointedly and Don's reaction is like, "even I am not witty enough to come up with a pithy comment about the marriage of Lane's desperation and your loaded sexuality, so I'm just going to sit here and wallow in tooth pain."
After a moment, Joan goes on that now there's this money, so Don gets an idea that might simultaneously alleviate some of the guilt and make some small amends for his part in Lane's death: They'll take fifty grand of the money and give it to Rebecca as repayment of Lane's investment in the company. And they explain about the investment actually having been a loan from the partners, but beyond that Lane's partnership interest isn't necessarily predicated on him being an active partner, is it? We know Bertram's sister was a partner in SC and she never worked there as far as we know. Of course, Don might do the exact same thing anyway, but I find it hard to believe that legally, Lane's interest in the company would vanish upon his death. Not that it's likely to be relevant either way, but still. Joan asks if they shouldn't have a vote, but Don tells her no and the idea that Joan thinks the plan is equitable is strongly suggested by her willingness to abandon parliamentary procedure with so short a fight. Standing, Joan wonders if Don is under the weather and he confesses he has a "hot tooth," which is just begging for a hacky joke about the tooth being in good company, but we'll move on to Joan telling Don she knows a dentist in the steeple of the Chrysler Building. "Even if he can't help you, you still get to see the view." Good enough for me, but Don tells her the pain will go away, and I know Don grew up a rube, but I thought even taking care of horses would give you some idea about the importance of diligent oral care. Dawn enters with the ice and Joan lingers long enough to tell Don, "Put that on your face, not in a drink." Don looks back at her like, "Don't worry, Dawn will be making another trip soon."
Marie, dressed to go out in a green Jackie O number, opens Megan's darkened bedroom and tells her in French that it's noon and it's time to go out. Megan replies that she doesn't feel well, so Marie comes in and sits on the edge of the bed, whereupon Megan confesses that she's sad. Marie tells her she knows, but she shouldn't feel sorry for herself -- she's got a lovely home and a handsome husband, "who provides you with everything even though you won't give him a family." Ah, that again; it's been a while, but in the context of everything that's happened I wonder if Megan's issue with having children comes from wanting to put her career first, just like Peggy. She may not want to admit that explicit connection even to herself, but it would make sense to me, especially since it obviously seems to puzzle her mother. Megan can't believe that Marie would throw that in her face at a time like this, and wonders why Marie never cares what she wants to do. Marie tells her it's because she's "chasing a phantom. Not every little girl gets to do what they want. The world could not support that many ballerinas." This is truth Megan doesn't want to hear: "Is that what you tell yourself?" Marie snaps back that Megan is an "ungrateful little bitch," proving that she gives twice as good as she gets. Just ask Roger! She adds that she thanks God her "children" aren't her whole life and there's another sibling we've never met?
A door opens, and Don swallows before saying he's sorry to drop by like this and this was the one scene I placed correctly from the previouslies, like, ever. Because, of course, Don is at the Pryce door and Rebecca tells Don that if she sounds distracted, it's because she was expecting a delivery of a bed, as her mother is coming to stay with her. Interesting that she wouldn't have returned to England; I wonder if she's staying on in the States as an homage to Lane, but surely it's got to be horribly painful for her still to be here. From her comment that she has nothing in the house though, I wonder if she's only just returned to settle affairs here. Anyway, first off, Don apologizes, saying that with the funeral abroad and her declining SCDP's offer to have a memorial in New York, he hasn't been sure how to express "our" condolences. And of course Don and all the other partners could afford a trip to England, but I'm guessing they took her refusal of their offer as a suggestion they wouldn't be welcome there. Rebecca imperiously says that perhaps that's the difference in their cultures: "We're not ones to wallow." Odd declaration given the circumstances of Lane's death, but I'm not going to be the one to argue with her. Don takes out the check and explains about the collateral the partners advanced, adding that the firm contractually has six years to repay it, but "it was unanimous" (two to none!) that they help her out now. Rebecca barely even looks at the check, however, as she gets to her feet and when Don does likewise, she sarcastically offers her hope that he feels better. Don's taken aback and becomes more so when Rebecca informs him, "You had no right to fill a man like that with ambition!" She retrieves something from a nearby desk, explaining that she found it in Lane's wallet, and it's the picture of Delores from early on this season, and boy, if that girl only knew the chain of events to which her poor image has been witness. Don denies knowledge of the girl, but Rebecca goes on that he should consider "all the brothels you frequent" and once again Don is being blamed for something in which he took pains not to participate, but then again he did set Lane up with a hooker last year so Rebecca's point can't be swept aside so easily. Powerless in the face of Rebecca's unflinching anger, Don suggests he should go and Rebecca agrees, but not before telling him once he's in the hall, "It's probably difficult for you to believe, but it was even more than fifty thousand dollars that already belonged to him. So don't leave here thinking that you've done anything for anyone but yourself." Not sure I follow her on the first point, but the second is crystal clear and Don looks absolutely beaten as he trudges away. At least his tooth showed mercy in not flaring up at that point.
Pete arrives home to find Trudy (not wearing a house dress, I feel I should note) feeding Tammy and Trudy has him check out some sketches of a pool she wants to have put in. She adds that Pete is "so much better" when he gets some sun, but Pete thinks it's a bad idea. "Tammy could drown!" Whether she understands the sentiment or not, Tammy chooses that moment to start bawling, which only augments Trudy's retort that she's tired of Pete's doom and gloom. And given that you can practically see the grey cloud over him, I'm starting to think Beth wasn't so wrong after all.
Roger and Marie burst through some French doors and fall onto the bed and they make out and exchange some light flirtation until Roger gets serious, telling him that one of his business partners ended it all and he could never do that unless he was sure he was going someplace better. "But then I think, maybe that place is here." Marie wonders what he's getting at, so he tells her -- he needs to drop acid again to really appreciate life and he'd like her to take it with him. Marie, however, recognizes how intimate a request this really is and begs him not to ask her to take care of him. He visibly deflates, but when she asks if there's anything else she can do, he kisses her and... well, you know, reinflates.
Don comes home to find Megan, not to put too fine a point on it, piss-ass drunk and he helps her to bed, on the way learning that Marie "abandoned" her. In the effort to haul her into bed, he falls on top of her and she tries for a kiss but he gives her the Hot Tooth Face, and she's not too wasted to tell him to go to the dentist, although it's because she wants to be able to do him. "It's the only thing I'm good for." Don wonders what happened to make her think something so ugly, but Megan goes on that this is what he wants, for her to be waiting for him when he gets home, which is why he won't give her a chance. If that's the case, it's pretty clever of her to illustrate the ugly side of that scenario. (And I may not have given the show enough credit at the time, but in retrospect, Megan feeling like she's supposed to be home for Don makes her pasta-hurling freakout over his late drinks with Joan make a lot more sense.) He tells her that's not true, but, half-crying, she tells him it's either that or she's terrible. "But how the hell would you know?" It's a good point, made all the more impressive by the fact that she's presenting it to four of him. Hearing Marie come in, Don tells Megan to sleep it off...
...and then he's asking Marie how she could leave Megan all wasted. Instead of pointing out that she probably was quite so trashed when she left, Marie tells him it's his job to take care of her and adds that she knows it's difficult to watch, but this is what happens when someone has an artistic temperament without the talent to back it up. "Take my advice. Nurse her through this defeat and you shall have the life you desire." Given Megan's earlier comment, it seems clear that Marie is speaking from experience; I'm not sure if Don realizes this, but if he does, he must not love the idea that he's going to grow up to be the Emile of the piece. Marie, not unkindly, excuses herself to write some postcards and then Don's tooth acts up enough to send him into a chair...
...and then into an actual dentist's chair, THANK GOD. The dentist tells Don that he should have had the thing extracted days ago OH YOU DON'T SAY, adding that he almost developed a nasty abscess. Don weakly replies that he kept thinking it would go away, but the dentist, setting him up with gas, tells him he's lucky he didn't lose his jaw. I mean, yikes. After Don's been breathing the gas for a bit, he reopens his eyes to find Adam, who speaks for the first time: "You're in bad shape, Dick." Don blearily asks what he's doing there and now I can see that Adam has a purple mark around his neck where the noose did its work as he tells Don he's going to do him a favor "and take it out. But it's not your tooth that's rotten." He starts to leave, but Don grabs him and begs him not to go, so Adam tells him he'll hang around. And you can hardly be blamed if you thought that was a bad pun of mine -- you don't know how many times I had to stop myself from discussing how "shocking" Beth's storyline was -- but it's Adam himself with the joke as he asks Don, "Get it?" I should probably exit with Adam after I tell you I appreciate his attempt at gallows humor. And for those three of you I didn't lose there, it seems clear that Adam is talking about Don letting go of his guilt, both over him and over Lane; the tooth is the physical manifestation of it and the fact that he wouldn't have it taken care of the indication that he felt he deserved to suffer for failing the two of them. The dentist then removes the mask and cautions Don that he's going to be sore, so he should take it easy, get the prescription he gave him filled and not smoke for twenty-four hours. Once Don is in an upright position again, he looks at the excised tooth, which is bloody and also has a large grey spot on it, the physical evidence of his emotional pain. And considering how completely gross it is, I'm really glad that he never, like, actually killed anyone.
A nurse opens the door and tells Beth that her "brother" is there to see her and after Pete enters, the nurse tells Pete he's right -- "You really do have the same eyes." Heh. When they're alone, Beth tells Pete that she's glad he came, but she knows she doesn't have a brother. He tells it was the only way he could get in, but although it doesn't become clear for a few moments, soon the reality sinks in -- she doesn't know who Pete is. Shaken, he gets up to go, saying he's in the wrong room, but she encourages him to visit with her anyway. He protests that he's there to see a friend, but she prevails upon him to stay and he reluctantly accedes. Not knowing Pete just made that up on the spot (and ignoring the fact that Pete randomly ending up in her room while searching for his male "friend" makes no sense), Beth brightly (she's certainly chipper enough, at least) asks what's wrong with Pete's friend and Pete takes a long moment before telling her that the friend got involved with another man's wife and the attendant "complications" put him in the hospital. Unsurprisingly not quite understanding, Beth nevertheless asks why he did it, so Pete tells her it was for "all the regular reasons" -- he needed to let off some steam, to feel some adventure, to feel handsome again. "He needed to feel that he knew something, that all this aging was worth something. He probably thought it would be like having a few tall drinks and feeling very very good, and that he would go back to his life and say, 'That was nice.'" Beth, still valiantly trying to follow along, asks if then he got sick, so Pete tells her that when his "friend's" paramour went away, he was heartbroken, and he realized everything he already had wasn't right either. "And that was why it had happened at all. And that his life with his family was some temporary bandage on a permanent wound." Well, if nothing else, Pete, your writing is getting better. Beth takes a moment to process all this, but kindly takes his hand and assures him that the hospital will fix his friend up and Pete stares at her for a moment like he's tempted to see about that, but then puts a brave face on and assures her "he'll" be fine. Before he leaves, though, he turns back to tell her it was nice to meet her, and she sincerely but unconcernedly wishes him good luck with his friend. And I can think of one person who called Pete's unhappiness some time ago, although he thought the source of it was suburban living. Still: Well observed, Ben Hargrove!
Don enters a movie theater, pauses for a moment in recognition and then gets the attention of a woman sitting by herself -- Peggy, who is definitely "not smoking" her way through that carton. She can't believe it and jumps up so they can exchange a warm hug, which was expected but, given the last scene we saw of theirs, not assumed. After establishing that she's not expecting anyone else, they sit together and among the pleasantries, he jokes that she hasn't been at the new place very long to be avoiding it, but she replies that she's "just knocking out the cobwebs. Someone told me this works." With only ten or so minutes left in the season, it's nice of them to give us a genuine "awwww" moment. He asks if it's going well, and she tells him yes. "Is that okay?" Filled with nostalgia and you can bet Don's thinking of the Greek definition as he says this, he smiles that it's the natural result of helping someone that they succeed and move on. "I'm proud of you. I just didn't know it would be without me." Peggy smiles that he should put her on his call list and then the conversation normalizes as they talk about the cigarette account Peggy's after -- she's even taking a plane (for the first time, it's heavily implied) down to Richmond to tour the factory. The movie starts, so Peggy quickly asks Don to give her love to Megan, adding that they should all get together. And look, I think Don has the most genuine of love for both women, but the thought of getting together with both of them at the moment is probably making him long for his tooth back as a distraction.
Pete's asleep on the train when Howard, obviously lubricated, finds him and suggests they head back to the city and get into some trouble. Pete, of course, thinks he's disgusting and tells him so, but when he starts talking about the electroshock treatments, realization dawns: "It's you? She always spreads her legs for the first chump she can find." After certain events this season, it's odd enough to see Pete Campbell defending a woman's honor, but here he is lunging at Howard; eventually, they fall into the aisle, with Howard getting in a punch I'm not sure was entirely intentional before they're broken up. After the conductor sends Howard away having heard that Pete started it, he tells Pete that after he cools off, he needs to go apologize to Howard. Pete, however, isn't calming down for anyone in a uniform and he snips and snaps at the guy until he kicks him off the train and when Pete gets on about that, the guy pops him in the face, which, if you'll excuse me, is a punch too far. But honestly, Pete, you really need to start picking on people your own size. Might I suggest Ginzo? He's been in a fighting mood lately. Pete literally is like, "You can't do that!" but the guy is unimpressed, telling him to disembark, as they're pulling into Harrison. Hopefully he can manage that without getting punched again.
However he may have managed it, Pete makes it home and Trudy bursts into tears at seeing his face turned to hamburger again. Also, it seems clear from her asking if he got in "another" car accident that he didn't tell her the truth about the Lane incident, which I can understand but it robs Lane of his finest moment, and honestly, I'm not too thrilled about the way everyone and their mother punching Pete in this episode cheapens Lane's accomplishment either. Pete tells Trudy he fell asleep and ran into a ditch, and she sits him down and tells him she can't live like this, knowing he's working so hard and then wondering if he's going to come home and in what condition? The fight beaten out of him, he assures her he'll come home, but she tells him that first thing the day they're going to find him an apartment in the city. She wraps his arm around her, but he's past the point where this would bring him any happiness -- he's given up pretending that he wants to live this life, at least to himself. I fear that bodes ill for Trudy and Tammy, but we can only wait to find out.
In black-and-white and without sound, Don is watching Megan's screen test; she looks beautiful, expressive and vulnerable, while Don looks by turns adoring and pensive.
Joan leads the partners up to the new floor, which is raw and open and Pete delightedly notes he's going to have the same view as Don. Don congratulates him without sarcasm, and we get a reverse look at the five of them staring out at the view and taking a moment to contemplate how they're reinventing themselves once again.
And now we're on set meeting our "Beauty" -- Megan. Of course, we don't know if Don merely got her the audition or if he went further, but the client certainly greets her with what seems like genuine enthusiasm, so whatever happened, I'm hoping that means she's actually good. The client then heads off, leaving Megan to whisper to Don, "You know I love you," before taking her spot for rehearsal. Now, I think Don changed his mind because when he saw how distraught Megan really was, he realized he was in danger of replicating a pattern. Remember how he said he didn't want Megan to be another Betty, or another Marie? I don't think he was just talking about bitterness in general -- Betty was a model, remember, and she gave that up for Don (and it sounds like Marie followed some artistic pursuit for a while as well). We know she missed it, but part of what she missed was probably having some purpose other than being a housewife, which is what Megan has been trying to tell Don she needs. I think part of him feels good about helping her. But the flipside of Don telling Megan that she didn't want it this way is that part of him isn't sure if he's being used and that makes him feel out of control, like this life he has isn't what he expected. So when he walks off the set and Nancy Sinatra's "You Only Live Twice" kicks up, which deals with you living "one life for yourself and another for your dreams," it feels rather appropriate. (Doesn't hurt that Don looks like he could be James Bond in the shot either.) Don heads to the adjoining bar and orders an Old Fashioned, the drink that we associate with the Don Draper of yore, and stares pensively...
...and then we get a montage, starting with a berobed Peggy in a motel room in Richmond looking out the window to see two dogs humping. Amused by this example of the chaos around her, she grabs her drink and sits in bed, looking thoroughly content. And just to finish my thought of earlier, if this shows, as I mentioned, that Peggy has cast off all doubts and is living the life she should be living, I wonder how it serves the show for her to continue on it. Not that I want her gone, but this show is not about happy people who know what they want, but people like...
...Pete, who's listening to his headphones with his eyes shut in an escape from the house he lives in...
...and Roger, who's naked and tripping. From behind, we see some Slattery ass as he raises his arms up and Roger on acid has been a surprisingly generous storyline, but the moment he actually says "I AM A GOLDEN GOD," I'm out.
And now we're back to Don, who gets asked for a light by a Heather-Graham-in-Austin-Powers-2-looking woman. He obliges her and then, indicating another attractive woman down bar, tells him her friend was wondering: Is he alone? He takes a loooong moment before turning back to her, inscrutably and yet not without interest, although that could be due to the wide reach of the question. And that's it for the season, which, despite some flaws, yet again, I loved. And while I'm not convinced this means the Don Draper of old is back -- remember the very last shot of the fourth season came to nothing too -- he surely is feeling at a crossroads. But we'll have to wait for Season Six to see if he actually separates his life from his dreams.
And thanks so much for reading! Hope to see you all again year.
John Ramos is a writer and film producer living in Los Angeles. His current film, "The Trouble With Bliss," starring Michael C. Hall, Lucy Liu, Brie Larson, and Peter Fonda, can be seen on iTunes and other digital platforms and cable VOD everywhere. (Facebook and Twitter here.) You can email him at couchbaron@gmail.com, follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/couchbaron, or check out his blog, "Pull Up A Chair," which he'd just love for you to stop by.
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