In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.
The New York Times advertising reporter calls Don with the news that CGC, a rival agency, has signed Clearasil, which is bad news, given that they're the ones that the crying Ho-Ho went to with his jai alai business after Don forgot to remember him to The Wall Street Journal. Things get worse when Don takes Bethany (yes, that Bethany from the season premiere) to Benihana for reasons that will become obvious, and while he's there he runs into his new arch-rival from CGC, who throws down the gauntlet in regard to Honda. Yes, Pete tells the partners that he's got a bead on Honda Motorcycles, which is especially exciting since they're dipping their toe into cars, but Roger, a good World War II vet, is unwilling to do business with the people who were responsible for killing his shipmates. Everyone else, however, wants to get Honda in, and Bertram even gives Pete some tips on how to deal with Japanese protocols beyond reading The Chrysanthemum And The Sword, which Pete has already been advised to pick up.
When the Honda people come in, they goggle at Joan's rack, but the meeting is going well enough until Roger crashes the party and starts throwing his weight around in an effort to sabotage the relationship. Pete and Don take him on, with Pete explicitly telling Roger that he's only trying to kill new business so Lucky Strike will stay as important as possible, and Don backing him up. After an off-screen talking-to from Bertram, Roger apologizes, but everyone except Don feels like it's too late to salvage the account. Don, however, after reading The Chrysanthemum And The Sword, comes up with some cloak-and-dagger bait-and-switch stuff that effectively takes CGC out of the running and gets SCDP a shot at Honda's cars. Not that they're worth buying at this point, but I have the feeling that might change.
While Don is on his date, Phoebe, the -door-neighbor nurse, babysits the kids, and gets more than she bargained for when Sally tries to cut her own hair, with predictably awful results. As a result, in addition to reading Don the riot act, Betty slaps Sally, and it's left to Henry to give her some parenting advice that might result in mother and daughter actually having a speaking relationship in the future. This, however, does not prevent Sally from discovering the joys of pleasuring herself, and when a neighbor mother catches her in the act, Betty's beyond mortified, and Henry finally prevails on her to have Sally see a shrink. Don's not thrilled, and seeks out Faye over glasses of sake for insight on why people need to talk about their issues. The two of them share some stuff about their lives that's rather touching in its honesty, made more so by the fact that they don't jump into bed at the end of it. Meanwhile, when Betty meets the prospective counselor, she opens up about all sorts of things, and it's devastatingly clear just how much she needs to talk about her own childhood. In the end, Sally goes in for her first session, and I can only hope it brings her some peace. I mean, at least one person of her gender in that house should have it.
Want more? The full recap starts right below! We start on a closeup of the New York Times crossword puzzle, and the shot reveals the solver as Miss Blankenship, who flips up her reading-lens attachment when the phone rings......while inside Don's office, Faye is bringing him up to speed on the different types of Vicks cough drops users while some dude I don't remember having seen before sits in. Two separate extensions then jingle in succession, and after no one proves to be on the other end of either, Miss Blankenship comes in and tells Don she knows she's not supposed to buzz him all the time, "but I don't know how else to do this. You have a phone call." Don informs her that buzzing him for phone calls is perfectly acceptable. "Things like coffee after I've said no, you don't have to ask again." Miss Blankenship hilariously counters that he's always asleep in there, and tells him that a reporter from the Times is on the line. When Don asks what it's regarding, she's like, "You want me to go ask?" How amusing is it that even she is aware that the less she interacts with people, the better? Don's expression agrees with her, so he breaks up the meeting and gets on the phone with "Walter Hoffman," the advertising reporter for the Times, who asks for a reaction to the news that "Cutler, Gleason, and Chaough" just signed Clearasil. Don winces, and I should have known better, but I neglected to mention last time that when Pete said he was going to throw Clearasil over to Geyer, Don was like, "Anyone but Chaough," so despite his feigned indifference here that guy has been on his radar for a while. Don loftily tells Hoffman that he doesn't keep track of accounts after they're resigned, but Hoffman's like, not so fast, cowboy -- CGC is also where jai alai landed after Ho-Ho ran crying out of your agency, isn't that interesting, and by the way, "Ted" Chaough told him that "every time Don Draper looks in his rear-view mirror, he sees me." Don declines the opportunity to make a comeback using the metaphor, which makes me think Miss Blankenship was on to something with the coffee, and instead tells Hoffman, "on the record," that he's never heard of Chaough." Hoffman chuckles to himself like, "So that's how we're playing things," and ends the call. Don, for his part, doesn't look happy, not that that's saying much these days.
Another closeup of the Times reveals a lead story about the U.S. moving to prosecute the Alabama police involved in the Selma attacks. Roger muses that "this thing" is not going away, and Bertram, referring to the Civil Rights Act of 1964, wonders why "they" can't be happy, since they got what they wanted. Pete's like, "Jim Crow, dickhead," and then Don enters and Joan calls the partner's meeting to order. Pete's first news is about Secor buying some TV time, and after Roger makes a couple jokes about "easing them into it" and "loosening them up," Bertram wearily tells him, "We've had that client for eighteen years, Roger." Well, this episode will show that he really has trouble letting things go. (I'm sorry. Truly, I'm sorry.) Pryce then announces that Pete has other news, and I love the idea that Pete goes to Pryce first with all his good stuff for a little British pat on the head. Anyway, a "Deerfield chum" of Pete's roped him into attending a dinner for the Asia society, and what eventually developed was a lunch regarding Honda Motorcycles, who control over fifty percent of the U.S. market and are apparently miserable at Grey. Pryce does that Japanese accent of his that killed in the movie theater before saying that they could bring three million in potential billings, and they're venturing into automobiles as well. Pete jovially announces that they have a meeting on the books, but Roger is like, "Your yellow buddies killed all my friends in WWII, so ixnay." Pete counters that if "Bernbach" can do business with Volkswagen, they surely can deal with the Japanese, but Roger's like, "Why don't we just bring Dr. Lyle Evans in here?" Bertram reacts like Roger's referring to a war criminal instead of an AMC marketing tool, and Roger leaves the meeting with the parting shot that Lucky Strike is just great. When he's gone, Pryce hilariously asks if it's standard for them to put new business to a vote, while Pete asks if anyone else really has a problem with it and Don is firmly like, "No." Looks like DCP is greater than S, for those of you interested in equations. Pete says he's been advised to read The Chrysanthemum And The Sword, as the Japanese "have their own way of doing business," and asks Bertram for some pointers; Bertram goes to get right on that, but not before cautioning them, "Keep Roger out of the loop." Make sure his vodka cabinet is fully stocked, then. Don orders that everyone in the office be given a copy of The Chrysanthemum And The Sword," if for no other reason than for the Honda people to see it on their desks (ill-advised, perhaps, but no one asked me), and then there's more discussion of the fictitious Lyle Evans. Let's put it this way: If Joan's never heard of him, he doesn't exist.
Cut to Sally and Bobby watching TV (a news program about the Alabama attacks, by the way) when Phoebe, the nurse from door, shows up, and Don, I'm not one to take Betty's side but having a babysitter while you have custody of the kids kind of isn't the idea, I don't think. But Don's got a date with Bethany, Jane's friend that we haven't seen since the season premiere, so Phoebe is up, and she brought her stethoscope for the kids to look at, which impresses Bobby. Of course, given his age, that's not too hard -- in fact, he's about the only person on the show more easily amused than Roger. Phoebe asks which one it is, and Don, thinking she's referring to the stable of women he has on hand, fixes her with a look, but she clarifies she meant which restaurant in case she needs to reach him, and he tells her Benihana's. Oh, ah so. Sally's the one who asks about Don's date, and when he tells her Bethany's name, she petulantly replies, "I don't like that." Heh. Don informs her that her approval isn't necessary, although he may feel differently when he arrives home...
...because sometime later, Bobby and Phoebe are watching cartoons when Sally emerges from the bathroom, and I hope Phoebe has some digitalis in her doctor's bag because she almost keels over -- Sally hacked off some of her hair. Bobby laughs that she looks like a "Mongoloid," which...okay, and Phoebe sends him off to bed before luring Sally over to the couch with the promise that she's not mad. What she is, however, is afraid that Don might actually deprive her of her life over this, but she's distracted from such thoughts when Sally points out that she has short hair and Don likes it. "Are you and Daddy doing it?" Phoebe is shocked, but Sally goes on, "I know what 'it' is. I know that the man pees inside the woman!" Well, that probably has hap...you know what? Never mind. Phoebe suggests she talk to her mother about such things, but Sally mutedly tells her she doesn't want to, and Phoebe may not be in a position to say this but you and I certainly are: I feel you, girl. Sally tells Phoebe she just wanted to look pretty, and Phoebe softens and leads her into the bathroom to attempt some damage control. And I'm sure Sally's reason will work on Betty with equal effectiveness!
At Benihana, things are also not going so great, as Bethany complains about the lack of intimacy in the setting, especially given that it's only their third date in five months. "Don't think I don't know why." I'd guess he's just periodically checking to see if you've moved someplace that's less strict when it comes to male visitors, but given this episode she probably thinks it's because of feelings or something. Actually, I think she does know it's about sex, or lack thereof, and the evening continues its downward slide when Ted Chaough appears and makes himself known to Don, and...oh, I didn't place him on first viewing with his hair not all over the place, but Ted is played by Kevin Rahm, who has been in a ton of stuff but whom I remember most from a brief stint when I was addicted to Judging Amy reruns. Yes, you can laugh.
Anyway, Ted introduces Don to his wife, and then throws some veiled barbs about Clearasil and Honda while Don looks like he wants to give this guy what I'd refer to, with much pleasure, as "a Jimmy Barrett special." When they part ways, Ted's wife is none too happy with his business-oriented dickish ways, while Don explains to Bethany that Ted is "some fly I keep swatting away." He adds that CGC hasn't done half of what SCDP has, but "the minute they declared themselves the competition, suddenly we were equal." Bethany has to work at it, but draws Don out of his reverie. He does, however, ask her to teach him how to use chopsticks, and across the room, Ted is watching Don with Manson Lamps so intent I'll have to be careful not to start referring to him as "the new Pete Campbell."
Don comes home and gets the bad news from Phoebe, including the part where the rescue operation was not a success and he'll need to take her to a salon. He angrily informs her that he's in for "a river of shit" from Betty, and insists that she take her fee as severance. She starts to say something, presumably about why Sally might have done what she did, but Don firmly tells her he's not interested in her advice, and kicks her out. On the one hand, I hope that's not all we see of Nora Zehetner, but I am kind of glad she didn't end up in bed with Don. Although I think she'd handle it better than Allison, not that that would be difficult.
And it's River of Shit time, as Betty's taking a nap in Henry's lap when they hear a honk from outside. Figuring it's Don with the kids, Betty gets up, and when she sees Sally wearing a hat and a guilty look, she pretty much knows what's coming. Nonetheless, she flips out when she sees the extent of the damage, and when Sally confesses that she's the one to blame, Betty doesn't even let her get halfway through an apology before slapping her hard in the face, like, complete with windup and all. The men are all "Hey hey HEY!" about it, and Sally, undeterred, says that it was an accident and she's really very sorry, but Betty isn't hearing it, and sends her up to her room, over Don's objections.
Henry has Bobby take Gene outside to play, and when it's down to the adults, Don tells Betty she didn't have to hit Sally. Betty agrees, and then yells upstairs, "Because it doesn't do anything!" You'll forgive me for finding that inappropriately funny -- in my defense, I'll say it's the only kind of funny Betty's really good at. She continues that Sally's got Picture Day coming up, and as punishment she can forget about an upcoming sleepover. Well, her instincts were pretty sharp on that one, I must concede. We get a close-up of Henry to show that he's concerned by how Betty is handling this situation, and Don tries to tell her that this is something kids do, but Betty seethes that she wanted long hair more than anything when she was a kid, and her mother threatened to cut her hair if she was bad. Of course, you'll notice she doesn't have long hair now, and that's all I'll say on that subject. She asks where the hell he was, and Don digs himself deeper when he mentions the presence of a sitter. She bites out that they might as well have been alone, and he snits in reply, "Because you're so good with them." True enough, but ineffective as a parting shot -- I would have gone to the subject of why they're still in the damn house months after he threatened to evict them.
When he's gone, Henry tells Betty he feels her -- after he got divorced, his weekends with his daughter Ellie were "sacrosanct" (I don't doubt your sincerity, but bring it down a notch there, guy), and here's Don not even taking a night off? Betty agrees, and wonders if a secretary, or "another whore" was watching them, and now I'm off thinking about Candace telling Sally about the birds and the bees and this is just not good, so let's get to the part where Henry tells Betty that all that is Don, not Sally, and girls do stuff like this, and not just the ones from broken homes. With an effort, Betty lets go of her anger and agrees that she was "impulsive," and Henry tells her he knows from experience that punishment will only make the situation worse, so Betty should reinstate the sleepover "when you're up there apologizing," like, is Henry The Betty Whisperer or what? She smiles that he's soft, and I would agree, BY COMPARISON.
Don arrives at the office and is immediately accosted by Pete, who'
s bearing a bouquet of chrysanthemums and cultural instructions, namely that they shouldn't criticize the Japanese or give them advice. Wow, that is some bizarre, inaccessible stuff there, Pete. Don is more interested in how CGC is involved and how Pete didn't know that, but Pete tells him it's just them, JWT, and CGC before going to get rid of the flowers. "Apparently they symbolize death." He moans about all the conflicting information he's getting, as if the episode title wasn't a clue to expect it and all.
Cut to Bertram and the elder statesman of the Japanese contingent ("Ichiro Kamura") bowing to each other as Don, Pete, and two Honda underlings stand at attention. Don then takes them on a tour, with the youngest of the Japanese men ("Takahashi") acting as translator. When they reach what looks like the break room to me but what Don calls the "Creative lounge," Pete dorkily tells them that he can't tell them how "it" happens, "but it does happen here." The interpreter, understandably enough, doesn't know how to turn that bullshit into Japanese, so when Pete orders him to tell them something, he offers, "I don't know what this room is for." Heh. Joan then appears and, after being introduced, says she hopes no one has taken them to Benihana, and the elder statesman doesn't wait for the translation: "David. Ogilvy." Ha! I guess his book didn't cover everything. Joan assures them she has a good list of steakhouses, but the middle-in-age man ("Saito") is focused on something else: "How does she not fall over?" Misogynistic, yes, but in his defense I will say she's looking extremely rackalicious today, even for her. Joan says they're not very subtle, and Takahashi, looking straight at the way her bazooms are accentuated by her jewelry and sweater, agrees: "No. They are not." HA!
Later, the group is in the conference room, and Kamura is giving his broken English a try in saying that they're looking forward to SCDP's presentation, and they definitely are interested in more drivers for their motorcycles. Bertram then directs Pete to give out some gifts to their guests, and Pete gives the protocol the old college try but still manages to make something of a mess of it. Still, everything has gone well enough until Roger enters in a cloud of righteous anger, both at the meeting having happened and at the attempted deception -- Pete sent him on a long lunch with a client that apparently was not quite long enough. Roger references the H-bomb attacks of World War II, which is an awfully quick way to go too far, but the two elder guys seem not to get it, and the interpreter stays wisely silent, instead saying the meeting's not quite done, as they have yet to present their rules. Roger: "So now you're dictating terms." Wow. John Slattery is really acting the hell out of this episode, showing us the depths of the usually uncomplicated Roger in stark relief, but it is difficult to watch, and the horrified look on Bertram's face agrees with me. The language barrier still seems to be working in SCDP's favor, though, as Don warily introduces Roger; the elder statesman then explains that all the firms will be given three thousand dollars for a "competitive presentation," and the interpreter then informs them there will be conditions of contest. Roger, however, pipes up that they want it to be "unconditional," and despite Bertram's efforts to shut him up, he goes off, telling them that they don't want any of their "Jap crap" before bidding them sayonara and stalking out. Bertram tries to apologize, and Pete phonies up an excuse for Roger's behavior, but the damage is clearly done even as the Saito instructs Takahashi to inform their hosts that they look forward to SCDP's presentation. They stand for a round of awkward bows, and then we get a close-up on war veteran Don's rather conflicted-looking face...
...but when he storms into Roger's office, he's baldly angry, and seethes that Roger doesn't get to kill this account. Roger: "Well, you know how they are. Maybe it'll kill itself." Sparkling wit even when drunk, angry, and mean? Why is he on the Accounts side again? Don plows on that it's not just about the money -- they could do amazing work on behalf of Honda -- but Roger tells him he does in fact get to decide who they do business with, and reminds Don of his own blow-up with Jantzen. Before Don can do more than counter that Jantzen was "over," though, Pete bursts in and accuses Roger of "wrapping [himself] in the flag" so he can keep Pete from bringing in an account that will make the firm less dependent on Lucky Strike, "and therefore less dependent on you." I think the phrase "them's fighting words" was coined for moments such as this, no? Because seriously, Roger charges at Pete like he's in the middle of a street in Pamplona, even adding an un-ironic "Why, you little..." for good measure, and Don has to get in his way. Roger half-chokes for Don to get Pete out of there, and Pete takes his leave, but not before telling Roger that the rest of them are trying to build something here. When Pete's gone, Don takes a long moment to give Roger's sensitivities some respect, but finally tells him, "He's right." He walks out into a commercial break, which is nice timing, given how intense that scene was. I'm sure the one is going to be a lot easier to watch, right?
Oh, dear. Sally, apparently having been to the salon, is over at her friend's for that sleepover. Her friend is crashed out on the couch, but the TV is on, and as Sally watches The Man From U.N.C.L.E., she, um, kind of...what I mean to say is, she...okay. She starts playing with herself. It's shot pretty non-explicitly, but that's still clearly what's going on, and Lord, if it was that hard to talk about, I can only imagine what it must have been like to direct. Kiernan Shipka is absolutely amazing, but...she's ten. Anyway, her reverie is interrupted by her friend's mom appearing and rather severely asking what she's doing...
...while Betty and Henry are, um, enjoying their alone time together when the doorbell rings. Henry offers to get it, which is nice of him, but I hope his robe is fairly loose-fitting, especially given what just happened with Sally. Downstairs, Henry asks if Sally's sick, and says he would have come to get her, but the woman stiffly says no, that's not it, and could she speak to Betty for a moment? When Betty appears, the woman dismisses Henry and then informs Betty that Sally was "behaving inappropriately." Betty gets a look of no surprise on her face, and despite the awkwardness of the scene I'm looking forward to seeing that wiped clean. When the woman breaks the news, Betty has to compose herself, but apologizes and says she would have done the same thing with respect to telling her were their positions reversed. The woman softens a bit and says she's sorry about the whole thing, and then Betty sees her out...
...before marching into Sally's room, and kind of heartbreakingly, Sally's sitting on her bed not even having taken her coat off, like, I don't think Betty's going to turn you out on the street quite yet, kid. Well, at least not as long as Henry's around. Betty grabs Sally by the chin and tells her she doesn't do such things, especially not in public, and when Sally denies any wrongdoing Betty threatens to cut her fingers off. Trying to one-up your mother, eh Bets? Betty tells Sally to go to bed...
...and then heads there herself, lighting a cigarette and saying how mortified she is before telling Henry what happened. She throws up her hands and asks what's wrong with the kid, and Henry pushes the idea of therapy for Sally, apparently not for the first time. What is new, however, is that Betty tells him about her stint seeing a psychiatrist, adding that she doesn't think it helps anything. Well, no, not when the shrink is reporting to your husband on the sly and then you find out about it. That truly does not help anything. Henry, however, says his daughter benefitted tremendously from seeing a child psychiatrist he found through her school, and he's not even so convinced that anything's so wrong with Sally, but it's obvious that her recent behavior has been hard on both her and Betty. When he tries to probe a little more about Betty's experience, she shuts that line of questioning down, but she does seem to have heard him about the Sally idea. I should also note that whatever demands are being placed on Henry's time these days, he apparently still works out, because for someone who looks and acts (and we've been there before, but ew) old enough to be Betty's dad, dude is in shape.
In a development that I can't imagine signals any good news, Don asks Miss Blankenship if she's had any luck with a call to California, and Miss Blankenship tells him there was no answer. She then announces "Misters Peters and Pryce" to see him, which means Pete and Pryce, of course, in case you lost your Blankenship-to-English dictionary. Pete's not sure what's going on -- he got a call from his contact Masao saying the meeting was a disaster, but then the guy turned around and called Pryce and set a time for their presentation. However, Bertram and Roger then enter, and Roger, apparently having had a talking-to from the only person he regards as senior to him, apologizes for his behavior and says he realizes he shouldn't limit their potential business in any way. The bad news, however, as Bertram sees it, is that they should have gotten a gift back from the Honda people, and the absence of one suggests they only fixed the meeting with the expectation that SCDP would use it to resign from the competition.
Don learns from Miss Blankenship that he did get a package, but it turns out only to be a taunt from Chaough, which sets off another round of bickering that culminates in Pete putting his hand over his heart: "I'm expecting a child!" Heh. I'm guessing the principals are going to be pretty sick of that line before nine months are up. For his part, Don is not quite ready to commit hara-kiri; he instead suggests they shoot something "outrageous" and "graphic" to get Honda's attention. Pryce, however, points out that the conditions limit them to boards and copy -- "no finished work" -- and besides, the budget they're limited to precludes anything like what Don's talking about anyway. Don wants to go out of pocket, but Pryce tells him doing a spec commercial will severely hinder their ability to pitch new business for the rest of the year, and Pete adds that he'd be willing to take that risk if he didn't think they were already dead in the water. With a baleful look Roger's way, he adds, "But we are," before heading out. Chastened, Roger follows with Bertram in tow, and as we go to commercial I can't help but wonder what Don and Pryce are going to do with each other in the face of this news. Maybe they'll get drunk and go to the movies again!
At home, Don is sitting up on his bed reading The Chrysanthemum And The Sword, and since he's projecting such an air of competence this episode I'll note that this is the first one this season in which he hasn't been guzzling booze like Prohibition is about to be reinstated. The phone rings, and it's Betty calling from the study, which is cute, given that's where Don used to make all his communications of a sensitive nature. Not that "sensitive" is necessarily the right word for Betty's leadoff, as she sarcastically asks if she's catching him alone, and Don, waist-deep in Japanese contradictions, is in even less of a mood for her even than normal. Betty says she would rather have told him about this in person, but it's "our feeling" (Don predictably bristles at this) that Sally needs to see a psychiatrist, and she's found one through the school. I'm no big fan of his, but I think without Henry Sally would be on her way to setting the house on fire, which is what Don wonders if she did. Betty informs him of the incident, adding that it was "in front of a friend," which isn't the whole truth in the sense that the friend was asleep, but I don't believe that detail was made clear to Betty, not that she would particularly care if it had been. Don is taken aback, but asks if the friend was a boy or girl, and Betty snaps, "Jesus, what's the difference?" Well, a lot, potentially, but she's right that it's kind of beside the point for the purposes of this conversation. In any case, she tells him the shrink will need to interview the both of them individually, and Don asks why she's even telling him if she's made up her mind. Rather than repeat the part she just told him about the shrink meeting him, Betty snarkily says that Sally's out of control, and she thought he'd be concerned. Don still isn't clear that she needs therapy, and asks if Betty can't talk to her, but Betty says she doesn't know what else to do, and adds that Sally's aware of a lot more than Don thinks -- "she understands a lot of things, thanks to you." Don retorts that Betty's the one that brought another man into Sally's house, but she counters, "One man, Don. How many have you had in your bachelor pad?" If he's had a lot of men over to his place, I'm calling for an immediate shake-up of the editing department here. Betty goes on to wonder whom the "girl" watching the kids the other night was, and adds that she's married. Don: "Jesus. You ever hear yourself?" Well, that's a good question with which to bring the discussion back to a more constructive, amicable...oh, wait, no. It's the complete opposite of that. Agreeing, Betty tells him she'll just give the information to his secretary, and he's so irritated that he doesn't even anticipate what a loudly projected disaster that rates to be. After he slams the phone down, he throws the book across the room, and Don, I understand your frustration, but to fix the damage Roger did, I think you're going to need all the studying you can cram in.
Ha! Closeup on one of those drinking birds that was almost responsible for blowing up Springfield; Peggy, Joey, Joan, Pete, and that guy who was in with Don and Faye earlier all cheer when it reaches the water in the Dixie cup, and if this is the "it" that happens in the Creative Lounge, Roger did Honda a favor with his little diatribe. Don, just arriving, appears in the doorway, and Joey asks if he's seen the thing before, adding that he's still trying to figure out what makes it work. Don: "I'm still trying to figure out what makes you work." Joey of course could counter that at least he was in the office at a decent hour, but given the mood Don's probably still in I think he's wise to refrain. Don calls for Pete, Peggy, and Joan to follow him, but before she leaves Peggy orders them not to touch the bird. "I want to see how long it goes." Heh. She certainly has gotten a lot more fun lately, hasn't she? Maybe it's not too late for a man to snap her up!
Once Don has led his group into the conference room, he reads a quote from the book: "A man is shamed by being openly ridiculed and rejected. It requires an audience." Jeez. If that's the cultural belief, how do people in Japan ever leave the house? Pete asks if he got that off a fortune cookie, but Don informs him that it's from "that book you were all supposed to read," and, irrespective of happenings and drinking birds, I'm kind of shocked that apple-polisher Peggy didn't crack it open. Anyway, Don's point is that the quote has given him a rather Machiavellian idea: CGC is their approximate size, and as such can't afford to make a commercial any more than they can, but Chaough is clearly so intent on tailgating Don that all they have to do is pretend they're making an expensive commercial, and Chaough will follow suit. Joan, unsurprisingly, is the first one to follow Don's logic, but Pete is worried that if Chaough does something amazing, he'll win the account. Don: "You let me worry about that." I'm enjoying the machinations, to be sure, but Don, before you place your entire financial future on The Chrysanthemum And The Sword, shouldn't someone tell you that many people think that book is horseshit?
Regardless of how well-advised Don's plan is, Joan is playing her part to the hilt, as she has this director who's working for Chaough on the Clearasil commercial in her office and is tempting him with fake storyboards for the fake commercial. Don then knocks, and when Joan answers, we see he's got a red Honda motorcycle, which he says he thought he could put in her office. Joan whispers, "Oh, how impossibly inconvenient your timing is, with this director in my office who's going to go blab to Chaough now!" Well, she actually only says, "Later!" but she conveyed a lot with that one word. Anyway, after Joan informs the director that he didn't see that, she bullshits that it'll be twelve scenes, and he'll need to figure out how to shoot on the Staten Island Ferry and to close Fifth Avenue. Heh. The director tells her he's dying to do it but he's really just too busy at the moment...
...and then he's telling Chaough, "You know I'd much rather shoot your Honda commercial." Heh, nice twist that Don's plan involved the director being unscrupulous and opportunistic; it lends some real artistry to it. Chaough tells him he doesn't have a Honda commercial, and his ensuing question of "Why the hell did they call you in? They know I have you booked," is certainly close enough to the mark that you'd wonder if Chaough might see through this whole scheme, especially since an older dude I take to be Pryce's CGC counterpart wonders how SCDP can afford it. However, Chaough instead tells his secretary via the intercom to get "that kid who worked for Draper" in there, and while we wait to see which old cast member is getting work this week, he comes up with an idea for a commercial involving a guy wearing a racing helmet on a Honda tearing through a subway tunnel with a train right behind. When he emerges from the subway and removes the helmet, though, the reveal is that it's a sexy girl. The CGC bean counter is like, that's great, we'll bring a girl in a helmet to the pitch, but that's not what Chaough has in mind, especially when Smitty (aw) appears and, in answer to Chaough's questions, says that Don certainly doesn't think rules in general apply to him. When he gets a faraway look on his face and calls Don a genius, though, Chaough gets annoyed: "Why don't you go work for your boyfriend? Get out!" I thought at first that was a firing, but Chaough adds that Smitty should give him twenty different words for pimples. Sounds like a tall order, but I have the feeling he'll knock two off right away with "Ted" and "Chaough." Anyway, the zit in question has decided that they are shooting this damn commercial...
...and then Operation Hook, Line, and Sinker continues as Peggy and Joey wheel SCDP's Honda up to a sound stage. They keep a watchful eye on one particular door, and when the light that signals they're rolling goes off and the CGC bean counter emerges, they make a big show of "quickly" and "quietly" getting the thing into another door. The guy goes rushing back in to report...
...and later, he comes out with the director and tries to get in. Unfortunately for them, Joey's a good guard dog, and smugly tells them that it's a closed set -- while inside, Peggy's just riding the Honda in circles, with no one else in attendance. Hee hee hee. This is how you get labeled a genius, Chaough.
When we return, it's dark out and Don's working in his office when he casts an appraising eye toward the bottle of sake Ted Chaough sent him; he then walks to the kitchen past people who are leaving for the day and grabs some ice, startling Faye, who's been running a focus group for Samsonite. When Faye tells him she's never had sake, Don pours them both a finger, and Faye says she doesn't know how he drinks the way "people" do around there. "I'd fall asleep." That's a best-case scenario, I'd say. After chatting a bit about a trapeze artist Faye interviewed, Don wonders why everyone needs to talk about everything, which is a classic little disclaimer in advance of him opening up, but one more thing needs to happen first, which is that he asks Faye about her home life, and she confesses that she's not married -- she just wears the ring to keep too many men from hitting on her. She then asks about him, specifically if he has children, which I would have thought she knew already given that by her own admission she researched him thoroughly, but she's probably just following the conversational cues here. He tells her their genders and ages, and when she offers that it must be hard to be apart, he admits that's true -- he feels guilty for not seeing them enough, in the high weeds when he does see them, and both relieved and sad when they're gone again. Faye sincerely expresses sympathy, and he continues that things aren't going well, and Betty wants Sally to see a psychiatrist. Faye assumes Don is against that, but Don merely says he doesn't even know, and it seems like his reflexive distrust of anything therapy-related has given way to guilt both over his part in Sally's emotional distress and his own inability to positively affect the situation. Faye, however, says that while she has no clinical evidence to support this, she's pretty sure that if Don loves her and Sally knows that, she'll be okay. I wouldn't have expected a comforting platitude from someone who wears a wedding ring to keep men at bay, but I suppose the point of this episode is that people, not just cultures, are full of seemingly incomprehensible contradictions, and the new way Don looks at Faye suggests that that's not always a bad thing. Faye finally breaks the moment by saying she should go, and Don can't resist digging in a little: "Fake dinner plans with your fake husband?" Faye wisely declines to answer that, and instead merely wishes Don a good night.
Betty's in with the psychiatrist, an older female redhead with a friendly face whose name we will soon learn is "Dr. Edna Keener," who says that from what Betty's already told her, the year has been quite eventful for her family, which is true in the way that a comet striking the Earth would be "quite eventful." Addressing what she perceives as an unspoken question, Betty tells the woman that she knows the second marriage seems fast, but she feels kids don't have the same concept of time as adults, and besides, Henry's really taken to Sally and Bobby. Dr. Edna (that's how she's going to have Betty and Sally refer to her, so why not) says that if Betty chooses to have her work with Sally, she'd like to meet her and then interview both Betty and Don. Betty sniffs that she doesn't think Don will come to see her. "That's his level of interest." Time will only tell whether that's true, I suppose, and Dr. Edna seems to agree as she moves on to ask if "this recent incident" is of greatest concern to Betty. To her credit, Betty doesn't, at least for the moment, bring up any social embarrassment and in fact says she thinks Sally's acting out mostly because of the divorce, but she goes on that Sally has in fact been different since her father Gene, with whom Sally was very close, passed away. Betty then pauses, seeming to struggle with expressing something, which Dr. Edna gives her the time to do, and she finally offers that she wishes Gene could have met Henry, and opines that they would have gotten along. That's obviously another dig at Don, but I do wonder if the obvious Daddy issues that were in play when Betty fell for Henry wouldn't have made Gene raise an eyebrow. Of course, he was kind of nuts, so who knows. Betty then moves on to her mother, and says if she had done what Sally did..."My mother was very strict about it." I can't see what Dr. Edna's writing on her pad, but I'd imagine it starts with "MOTHER MOTHER OH MY GOD MOTHER." She recalls a time her brother bought a "nudist" magazine, and when their mother found it, she nailed it to his bedroom door. I'm assuming she put it on the outside, right? Otherwise it just seems like the definition of a pinup. Dr. Edna gently asks about Betty and such practices, and Betty replies that she was "private" and "mostly" outgrew it, demurely declining to bring washing-machine-related exceptions into the conversation. But seriously, I know Betty went to therapy before, but I can't remember her discussing anything quite this potentially embarrassing with Dr. Wayne; the fact that she's confiding in this woman she's only just met is probably a good sign for the character. Anyway, Betty says she of course knows that children do this, but not in public, and she feels that Sally may have been punishing her. Dr. Edna, concentrating on the person before her, offers that that must be a terrible feeling, and Betty admits it is before saying, with a note of pleading, that she had to get divorced, not just for her own sake but to bring the kids some stability, "and in the end, she doesn't understand that it'll be better." Dr. Edna suggests that it might not be a bad idea for Betty to talk to someone, but while Betty doesn't refuse the suggestion as harshly as she might, she still says she's okay. Dr. Edna suggests that they at least meet once a month to keep up with Sally's progress, although she does say that she won't discuss any specifics of what she and Sally talk about, which Betty rather hilariously says is "better." Might as well wait until Mommie Dearest hits the stands and read it all at once! Dr. Edna suggests she and Sally "start" at four days a week, and I certainly hope the idea is for that number to go down over time rather than up. Dr. Edna goes to consult her date book, and when she's alone, Betty regards a dollhouse Dr. Edna has in her office and can't suppress a fond smile. Will wonders never cease?
Don is waiting alone in an anteroom in what looks like Honda's hotel suite when Team CGC emerges from within. Chaough asks Don where his film is, and when Don tells him he didn't make one, Chaough's like, you're SOL, "because I wouldn't want to follow what I just showed them with a speech and a couple of posters." Good thing he doesn't have any posters, then. Don is shown in, and after informing Team Honda that the rest of the SCDP partners couldn't make it, he speechifies that they created the conditions of contest to even the playing field, and it specifically prohibits finished work. Since it's his understanding that not everyone has observed this condition, he's withdrawing SCDP from the competition. Takahashi translates as Don gets to writing something, which he places in front of Kamura and thanks him for thinking of them, and once he's gone, we see he's written Honda a check for three grand from his personal account. Ha! The only thing that would have made it more awesome is if he'd written how disappointed he is in the memo section.
Joan comes in to see Roger with a Lucky Strike issue, and Roger slurrily tells her to take it to Pete. She snaps at him to stop it already with the feeling sorry for himself, and when he starts to tell a war story about what sounds like a kid who died on his watch, Joan cuts him off, as Greg is going to be in uniform any day now, and as such she really doesn't want to hear it. Roger, however, wonders how Greg is going to feel someday "when some Pete Campbell goes to some Vietnamese doctor?" He asks when forgiveness became a better quality than loyalty, and I have a rule that I don't get dragged into such discussions with fewer than five minutes left in an episode, so I'll let Joan answer: She tells him she knows it was awful for him and the passage of time won't erase it like it will for people who weren't involved, but he fought to make the world a safer place and won. He asks if she really thinks so, and she simply replies, "I have to." They regard each other for a moment before she withdraws...
...and then Don is returning to SCDP to hear Miss Blankenship bark that his daughter's psychiatrist called. Well, it didn't take any special prognosticative powers to call that one. Don winces and asks her to lower her voice before heading into his office, but he doesn't even get a drink fully poured before Pete and Pryce enter with congratulations; Pryce informs him that he just heard from Saito that Honda was never actually going to leave Grey, "but of the three princes invited to meet their princess, you were the most charming," and as a result they've got first dibs on their car business, the presumption being that it's too small at this point to fit in at a huge agency like Grey. Don asks about CGC, and Pryce confirms that they're out of the running before telling him that the "stunt" he pulled was "unseemly." This from the man who pulled the trigger on the biggest stunt of 1963.
Pryce continues that Joan couldn't have rented stage space without bringing him into the little plan, and says the only reason he allowed the scheme to go on is that he "realized that our financial future was related to Mr. Chaough's demise." It actually doesn't sound much less unseemly when you say it in British, Pryce, and Don agrees: "Are you thanking me or reprimanding me?" Pryce accepts a drink as he says it was a big risk, but Pete, awesome as he's been lately, steps in: "We're thanking you." Heh. Don tells Pryce to send over what he has on the car, but Pryce tells him it redlines at 9,500 RPM but only has 57 HP. "It's a motorcycle with doors. The nice thing is, it has windows, so you can see your brains spatter against it when it crashes." Pete assures Don that Honda is working on it, and toasts the other two, but that's probably beside the point anyway -- they scored a victory over Chaough that will no doubt be reported in the press, not to mention the part where they dealt him a crippling financial blow. I'd imagine Don would call the Times reporter himself, if he could find a way to keep Miss Blankenship out of it.
Carla has taken Sally to the psychiatrist's office, and after a door opens and a boy emerges, Dr. Edna greets Sally with a smile and invites her inside. Carla and Sally exchange a bit of a wary look, but they rise and, after Carla puts a hand on her shoulder, Sally goes inside. The door closes, and hopefully, we're on our way to some Westchester détente. See you time.
John Ramos is a writer and film producer living in Los Angeles. You can email him at couchbaron@gmail.com, or follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/couchbaron and https://twitter.com/eastfifthbliss.
Discuss this episode in our forums, and read our interview with Lane Pryce himself, Jared Harris. Then see the show's most outrageous moments so far!
Should poor little Sally Draper get her own spin-off show? Our vloggers make the case:
Watch an interview with Trudy Campbell, herself, Alison Brie.
Want to immediately access TWoP content no matter where you are online? Download the free TWoP toolbar for your web browser. Already have a customized toolbar? Then just add our free toolbar app to get updated on our content as soon it's published.
Carla has taken Sally to the psychiatrist's office, and after a door opens and a boy emerges, Dr. Edna greets Sally with a smile and invites her inside. Carla and Sally exchange a bit of a wary look, but they rise and, after Carla puts a hand on her shoulder, Sally goes inside. The door closes, and hopefully, we're on our way to some Westchester détente. See you time.
John Ramos is a writer and film producer living in Los Angeles. You can email him at couchbaron@gmail.com, or follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/couchbaron and https://twitter.com/eastfifthbliss.
Discuss this episode in our forums, and read our interview with Lane Pryce himself, Jared Harris. Then see the show's most outrageous moments so far!
Should poor little Sally Draper get her own spin-off show? Our vloggers make the case:
Watch an interview with Trudy Campbell, herself, Alison Brie.
Want to immediately access TWoP content no matter where you are online? Download the free TWoP toolbar for your web browser. Already have a customized toolbar? Then just add our free toolbar app to get updated on our content as soon it's published.