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Raylan and the marshals have Shelby holed up in, hilariously, Arlo's place, which isn't looking particularly safe given the chopper ominously circling the place. Knowing they have to move before Tonin can hit them with everything he has, they make a plan to strike out for Lexington. Meanwhile, unlike Wynn, Boyd has chosen to face Augustine, and despite taking some very heavy punches to the face, Boyd is still adamant about getting that half a million bucks should he deliver Shelby. He gives Augustine advice borne of his extensive knowledge of Raylan that results in Colton and a sharpshooter of Augustine's heading to a particular junction, at which a convoy of marshals does in fact soon arrive.
Tim, knowing Colton is out there, smells a rat in the form of some abandoned cars rigged with explosives and stops his group, but he's not the only one thinking ahead – his entire party is a decoy, and Raylan and Art are planning to get Shelby out of there by air. After Art tells Raylan he'd better move from Arlo's, Tim eventually calls Colton, and the two of them have a pretty hilarious "hypothetical" conversation about their situation; soon, it becomes apparent that Shelby is not present. When Colton reports this to Boyd, he knows he'd better figure out Raylan's real move, or like Shelby last week, he'll probably be wishing for death soon enough. But, recalling how a helicopter once landed on the roof of the high school he and Raylan attended, Boyd guesses Raylan's location, and he and another of Augustine's men head for the place.
Raylan and Rachel take Shelby to the aforementioned now-abandoned high school to hide out -- but hey, do you remember how Constable Bob set up a motion detector at Arlo's to alert him if anyone intruded? Turns out he installed the same setup for the high school, as they were having trouble with wire thieves themselves, and he calls Raylan and confirms his location. With Bob having come to Arlo's to find Raylan thanks to that text, he's a sitting duck for the Tonin man come to check out the place, who takes great pleasure in loosely emulating Michael Madsen's character in Reservoir Dogs. A raaaaaather long scene ensues, but Bob won't give Raylan up despite really getting the crap beaten out of him, and he manages to stab and then fatally shoot the guy just before Raylan shows up to rescue him. Raylan and Bob manage to make it back to the high school, but the enemy's air support gets there before their own, and soon Raylan is having a conversation with Boyd and yet another Tonin guy that makes it clear they're going to be hit full force as soon as the rest of Tonin's men arrive. However, Tim uses a Molotov cocktail to detonate one of the explosive-filled cars boxing them in, so the marshals head to back Raylan up, while Colton surprisingly turns on Tonin's sharpshooter and kills him for reasons yet to be revealed.
Back at the bar, Augustine amuses himself by being disgusting to Ava, and when Johnny eventually tells him to stop, Augustine reveals Johnny's betrayal of Boyd. Ava, God love her, nicks Augustine's gun and really, really almost kills him, but merely escapes to leave Johnny and Augustine all awkward.
In the end, Boyd and Tonin's cronies enter the high school's principal's office to find Raylan and Bob, but no Rachel or Shelby. As the marshals arrive, Raylan invites his enemies to withdraw for the moment, so the conflict is resolved without bloodshed – while Rachel and Shelby ride a coal train out of Harlan. The chase continues – week.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Okay, I almost never mention previouslies because I have enough ground to cover with the actual episode, but I have to give some love to this: They show Augustine's first visit to Wynn, and he tells Wynn about Thompson having shot Tonin; Wynn's like, fine. Then Augustine tells Wynn he'd like him to find Thompson -- only this is after Augustine killed Barkley, so when the shot cuts back to Wynn, there's blood everywhere, even though the scene would appear continuous to anyone watching. I'm not doing it justice, but check it out; it's hilarious. And now:
As foreseen last episode, Tonin is not going to let Shelby get out of Harlan alive -- not if the chopper circling ominously overhead has anything to say about it. From the ground outside Arlo's house, the marshals and Sheriff's Department personnel watch grimly, and Art asks one of the latter if he'd happen to have a rocket launcher. Heh. The answer is negative, and after Art tells Tim the sniper, armed with a rifle almost the size of him, to shoot the thing if it approaches, Art gets a call from Lexington...
...while Augustine, that perpetual smirk on his face, compliments Boyd's sense of style before asking him where he got his lovely teeth. Boyd evenly tells him they came with his Desert Storm service, and he's his typical verbose self about it, prompting Augustine to compliment the way he talks, "using forty words where four will do." Well, Augustine, if he weren't relying on his ability to talk his way out of tough situations, he'd probably be sharing a Motel 6 bed with Wynn Duffy, so you can't really begrudge him his wordiness. Augustine asks what Boyd would say if he told him he was about to riddle his nice clothes with bullets, getting this reply: "'What're you waitin' for?'" Augustine is like, oh so you're tough now, but Boyd's ready for that: "I tried to keep it to four words, allowing the contraction as one." Hee. Augustine giggles too, but perhaps his amusement is less genuine, as his move is to say a "Yolo"'s name, prompting a raaaaaather attractive young man to step forward and pummel Boyd a couple times. And despite the guy's name, these are no joke punches either -- the second one, a full-on elbow, topples Boyd out of his chair and cinematically knocks one of those Army-issued teeth out. It is not safe around here, Boyd.
Speaking of Wynn, Augustine points out that he fled while Boyd stayed, the latter of which he considers a "bold" move, and Boyd, who's managed to crawl back into his chair, replies that he "wagered" that Augustine would see that working together was still in their mutual best interest. And by the way, I have to point out this: From Augustine's point of view, Boyd essentially delivered, right? He presumably doesn't know about Johnny spilling the beans to Raylan, and he saw Shelby there waiting for him on a handcuffed platter, so the only logical explanation from his point of view, it seems to me, is that his stupid noisy chopper tipped the Feds off. Not that I'd expect that to make a difference, but I figured I'd mention it, especially since it looks like it hurts Boyd to talk at the moment.
Augustine asks if Boyd believes in God, and Boyd simply replies that he doesn't, which is nice, given that the long version of that answer could keep us here all day and night. [Note: Walton Goggins answered the question here, though! -- Rachel] This doesn't stop Augustine, however, from talking about Abraham and Isaac and how the God of the Old Testament was "kind of a dick," and the real question is why Abraham entertained the idea of killing his own son. Boyd, forced to play along here through the ringing that's surely in his ears, says the conventional wisdom is that he was demonstrating his faith, but Augustine demurs, thinking it's because Abraham knew God was boss and as such needed to be obeyed without question. Even though this tale has even less subtlety than Limehouse's, Boyd restrains himself from commenting on same, instead merely asking what Augustine's god has told him to do, getting this answer: "Kill Drew Thompson." So, not bring him back alive, then. For a ruthless mobster, Augustine, you really have been surprisingly unclear on that point.
And despite all the references to divine authority, Boyd informs Augustine that to find Shelby, he'll need Raylan; to find Raylan, he'll need Boyd. "And if you want me, I'm still gonna need five hundred thousand dollars." In response, Augustine steps forward and cracks Boyd with an uppercut so hard that Yolo could take lessons, and as Boyd recovers not just from the impact but from the sheer surprise of what a punch Augustine packs, Augustine blithely remarks, "You're so glad you didn't ask for two million." So's a certain U.S. Army dentist, I'd imagine.
It's time for a little more Drew Thompson history, and Shelby is asking Raylan how long the license was in the wall. Raylan replies that his family moved in when he was fifteen, and Rachel dubs it "The House That Cocaine Built." True, Rachel, but it hardly sounds unique in that regard. Raylan sardonically asks if Shelby kept Waldo's ID as a trophy, but Shelby tells him it was more for practical concerns: He couldn't leave it in the plane or throw it away, as it would have been found, and Arlo said he'd burn it (I'm inferring that Shelby was too screwed up from his landing to do anything for himself for a while). Raylan chuckles at the irony, but his mood darkens when Art tells him it'll be forty-five minutes before their air transport can get there from Lexington. Raylan thinks they can't just sit there for that long waiting for Tonin's men to hit them, and then one of the Sheriff's Department guys enters and tells them they have six units on their way that can meet them at "the pass," and if all goes well they could make it to Lexington in two hours. Art and Raylan exchange an inscrutable look...
...while, at the bar, Boyd has apparently been spared any further physical distress, as, with a map in front of him, he's detailing their options: The first is to hit them at Arlo's, but he points out that it's on a hill with good sightlines, and as such is very defensible. Colton pipes up that they'd need at least a dozen men with heavy weapons and the resolve to lose at least half of them, prompting Augustine to inquire, "Who is he and why is he talking?" While that may seem rude, it'll teach Boyd to make the proper introductions time. After Boyd rectifies his omission, Augustine asks "Picker," his older apparent lieutenant (who, by the way, is played by John Kapelos, who has credits a mile long but to me was most notably the janitor Carl in The Breakfast Club), how many men he has, and Picker counts four, but Boyd says that they're not going to arrive in time -- thanks to reports from the Tonin chopper, they know the marshals have a tow truck in their arsenal, which means their convoy will be able to push cars out of the way if necessary. "Raylan Givens intends on driving Drew out." Augustine replies that the marshals are fueling a helicopter in Lexington, but Boyd is sure that Raylan won't wait around to close the greatest case of his career -- he'll drive, and he'll take "the pass," so it certainly seems like Boyd has Raylan's number here. He points to a spot on the map and says their move should be to send Colton there. Augustine balks at the idea of him going alone, but Colton pipes up that he could use a shooter, so Augustine, indicating the man on his left, replies, "Colt, Mort. Mort, Colt." See how easy that was, Boyd? The two men head out, whereupon Boyd remarks to Ava, "At least I ain't gonna die today." To quote many Frisky Dingo characters when referring to statements such as that: WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT? Credits.
When we return, Tim and Art are in the lead vehicle of a convoy, and despite the imminent danger I'd really like to be in the back seat for this ride. We see a couple abandoned transports by the side of the road, and speaking of danger, Tim, driving the first car, suddenly skids to a halt, nearly causing a marshal pile-up in the process. Art asks what he's doing, so Tim, looking... well, I was going to say "as intense as he gets," but I have the feeling we won't get that until his final showdown with Colton, so let's just say he's appearing pretty damn focused as he says that three abandoned cars by the side of the road means big trouble. Art asks if he's thinking IEDs (Improvised Explosive Devices), and wonders if he's sure, to which Tim replies that it's possible he's having a full-blown PTSD episode. Art, rather conversationally given the circumstances, asks if he gets those a lot, and Tim replies, "Only when I'm handlin' firearms in public." Heh. Tim then gets a call on the walkie-talkie asking what they're doing, and Tim tersely tells whoever's on the other end to pull up behind him "and stay off the goddamn radio." And the reason for his terseness is twofold, as we see the caller is wearing Raylan's trademark hat...
...only Raylan is not in it, as we see when we cut back to Arlo's place. So the convoy is a decoy -- which isn't the biggest surprise given the episode title -- and Tim told the dude on the walkie to shut up not only to keep their plans secret but also just in case anyone familiar with Raylan's voice was listening.
Rachel reports that the helicopter just took off from Lexington, which puts it half an hour away according to Art's earlier statement, but despite the apparent time they have to play with, Raylan denies Shelby's request to change his clothes and take a shower. Raylan, I'm not saying you owe Shelby anything, but it might actually be a smart move for Shelby not to be wearing a lawman's uniform, not to mention that an overdue shower is usually as much a public service as it is anything else. Shelby's pretty sure he's going to die this day, but says that if he's not going to bathe, he'll just sit and enjoy the view, and when Raylan expresses surprise that said view even exists, Shelby disbelievingly asks how many years he lived there. Raylan says he kept his nose in a book most of that time -- "Hardy Boys, Stephen King, whatever," and thanks, Raylan, now I'm imagining Hardy Boys adventures told by Stephen King and trying not to giggle. He quotes, "There's no frigate like a book," which Shelby recalls Arlo having recited as well.
This provides a segue for him to tell Raylan that he and Arlo met in Saigon, in front of a whorehouse, in fact -- Arlo was apparently holding a Louis L'Amour book in his hand, and Raylan notes that doesn't sound like him. Shelby goes on that he started to bust Arlo's chops, whereupon Arlo told him some prankster in his unit had slipped him LSD, and he was trying to find the guy's name in the book (heh) "so he could castrate the bastard." Raylan: "That sounds like him." Hee. Shelby says he talked Arlo down -- he'd already gotten laid so didn't mind spending the time -- and Arlo told him to look him up if he ever got in a jam. So I guess, when Shelby first parachuted into Harlan, he intended to look Arlo up regardless, or even had already done so -- his broken legs were only an added incentive. Raylan expresses surprise that this is what Shelby wants to talk about, prompting Shelby to retort that Raylan can't even stand to think about Arlo for a moment. Raylan, however, thinks that all that's on Shelby's mind is figuring a means of escape; Shelby reiterates that he's done running, but Raylan does not so much believe him. He then gets a call from Art informing him of the convoy's situation, and they come to the conclusion that it's possible their cover's been blown, so the group at the house needs to leave -- now. When Raylan disconnects, he tells Rachel to contact Air Ops before yanking Shelby out of his chair...
...while set off from the road, Colton and Mort are watching intently, the latter set up to shoot a rifle with telescopic sights. Mort replies he sees "the cowboy in the follow car," the marshal driving the lead vehicle, and what looks like a statie in the truck. (A propos of nothing, this will mean nothing to anyone who didn't see The Understudy on Broadway, but I was recently reminded of Mark Gosselaar's line readings of "GET IN THE TRUCK!" and that's all I can think of when I hear the word "truck" now. If history is any indication, it'll pass in like a year.) Colton asks if there's any sign of Shelby, and Mort speculates that he could be in a trunk, so Colton decides they'll wait a minute and see if the convoy moves. Speaking of which, Art wonders if they should retreat, but Tim points out that they already passed one car, and he thinks it's filled with explosives, so they're pretty well boxed in. Art wonders how they could pull this off, so Tim, getting his phone out, tells him about Colton...
...and then Colton's phone is ringing. He answers to hear a drawling "Hello, Bagram," to which he replies, "Well, hello, Deputy Dawg!" I'm definitely going to miss the "Mornin', Sam" exchanges these two have. After Tim puts the call on speaker and ascertains that Colton served in "the sandbox" as well as in Afghanistan, he tells Colton that he's writing a book on Iraq, and in it, during an MP convoy's transport of a prisoner, the lead guy gets a bad feeling. Also, Colton hilariously asides that Tim can't call his lead character "Lieutenant Dan" due to the same name having been used in Forrest Gump, and when Tim offers to change it to "Lieutenant Colt," Colton replies, "I would like a young Gerard Depardieu to play me in the movie." And if Ron Eldard has never been compared to Depardieu, I'll eat Raylan's hat, so good on him for having a sense of humor about it.
Anyway, after a "hypothetical" back-and-forth about Colton's drug habit, Tim brings it back to the topic at hand, which is whether Colton has ever come across IEDs triggered by cell. Colton says personally, no, but he did hear about this one situation where the spotter of a convoy called a halt between two cars, and they were so afraid to move, thinking either car they approached would explode, that they just sat there until they ran out of food and had to eat each other, and the last one blew his brains out. Tim's amused by all this, as demonstrated by his response to Colton asking if he wants to hear the sad part: "Oh, there's a sad part?" Hee. Colton concludes that they never even found out if the cars were rigged, "so basically, they all died from bein' pussies." With that, he hangs up and tells Mort that they'll force the convoy to move, and orders him to shoot the back windows and sides, "but do not shoot the drivers or the tires." Mort nods...
...but in the car, Tim informs Art that they're going to be made to move -- and as such, they're going to do so. With that, he peels out and parks his car behind the tow truck, and the other two members of the convoy follow suit. As we hear a chopper overhead, Colton disbelievingly notes, "They circled the wagons." I bet it'll sound even better in Tim's book.
Boyd gets the news from Colton via phone and reports that the convoy is a decoy. Augustine remarks that Boyd can't catch a break, although I suppose the fact that Johnny and Ava are there suggests he's not planning on killing Boyd at a moment's notice. A couple hours, I could see. Augustine asks Boyd what now, and when Boyd looks like he might need a paper bag into which to hyperventilate as he requests a moment, Augustine asks Picker the status of the marshals' copter, and when he's told it left ten minutes earlier, replies, "Awesome." Augustine then sends Yolo to Arlo's, and when Boyd interjects that Raylan won't be there, Augustine replies, "That's a comment, not a solution." Boyd, that reply was pretty predictable, so if you were this unprepared for it, you might as well sit and think like you said you would.
Raylan, Rachel and Shelby enter a high-school building that's seen better days, and when Shelby remarks that they're really in trouble, Raylan replies, "We ain't in deep shit because my alma mater's a flawed redoubt. We're in trouble because of you." Leave it to Raylan to find the weirdest time possible to display school spirit. As they march through the school to a defensible position, Shelby tosses off a bon mot about high schools being like prisons and adds that he went to Vietnam to get out of the former -- he was a flier even back then, and it was a grand old time. Raylan comments that Shelby's lived the life of ten men: "It's a wonder you keep straight what's real and what's horseshit." Shelby wonders if Raylan is going at him "like this" because he had Raylan fooled, and Shelby, as I've mentioned many times, you're the best, but in Raylan's defense it does seem like you've had a lot of horseshit to keep track of. It remind me, though, how many men on this show were in the armed services and as such have seen something of the world -- it does explain how many cultured lowlifes there are in Harlan. Raylan does allow that he's tired of the "folksy reminiscing," to which Shelby replies that he was right under Raylan's nose, and although Raylan will come out of all this a hero, "you will be the butt of a couple of jokes too." Well, Shelby, Raylan did have twenty grand in cash stolen and used to purchase fighting chickens. If he survived that humiliation, I think he'll be okay here.
Shelby continues to needle Raylan, pointing out that he's not doing such a great job to have the three of them up against an Apache (that's the attack helicopter, in case you're unfamiliar) raid, but Raylan's too jazzed at the prospect of putting Shelby away to care, and wonders if Shelby wants them to see him as the valiant underdog. Shelby replies that his efforts to get away from the Detroit mafia and what he did to Waldo were desperate, prompting Rachel to ask what exactly Shelby did to Waldo -- how did he pull it off, exactly? "Knock him over the head, dump him out [the] plane... hold a gun on him? Make the man jump? Or, did you give him a smile and a thumbs-up as he stepped out, knowing you'd rigged his chute and he was going to his death?" Rachel's tone seems to indicate she thinks the last supposition is the truth, and I speculated about it last time, but given that Waldo's chute was open when he landed, it seems likely that he came in crazy hot, and that could be due to Shelby overloading him with cocaine. It seems like a waste of a lot of product, but he had to get Waldo's cooperation somehow, and anyway, we know Shelby took way more on his own jump than he should have as it was. Shelby says what he did to Waldo still haunts him, but Rachel, not sounding like she's buying, continues with the sweetly contemptuous tone as she asks if the fact that Waldo was a scumbag helped. "Is that how you justified it?" I wonder how many times the writers allow themselves to use the series title per season, and if there's an office prize for the writer who pens the script containing it. Shelby says yes, frankly, but Rachel goes on that Shelby's rationalized a lot of things so he can get what he wants. "The question I have is, what do you want?" It's a good question at that, but Shelby merely complains that he wants a shower and a change of clothes, "but that ship has sailed." Hee.
Raylan then gets a call from Constable Bob, who's at Arlo's -- the motion detector just went off. Uh oh. And by "uh oh," I mean "Yolo." Raylan's like, we're fine, but he freezes when Bob asks if he's at the old high school -- whoever's still in charge of it was having trouble with wire thieves, so they had Bob install a motion detector, same as the one at Arlo's. The situation still being under control but threatening to get out of hand, Raylan urgently tells Bob he needs to get away from Arlo's, but Yolo's truck is already speeding up the dirt road to the house, and Bob asks if "this" is one of Raylan's. When Raylan figures what's going on, he tells Bob he needs to hide, but clearly, it's too late for that...
...but it's not too late for Boyd, who pleadingly tells Augustine that the police helicopter won't be landing at Arlo's because Raylan isn't there. Augustine asks how he knows, to which Boyd simply replies they dug coal together. I can't believe Boyd would think this would have any weight of meaning to a carpetbagger like Augustine, but Boyd gets the last laugh, at least metaphorically, when Picker gets the report from Yolo that neither Raylan nor Shelby are at the house. Picker does hear, though, that someone else is there...
...and at the house, we see Yolo has Bob inside. He asks if Bob's a crossing guard, and when Bob replies, with all the terrified dignity he can muster, that he's a "duly elected" town constable, Yolo relays that into the phone, then replies, "Yeah, I don't know what that is either." HA! Yolo also reports the far more pertinent information that Bob's cell-phone history shows that he called Raylan only five minutes earlier...
...while back at the bar, Augustine is like, so you were right about the helicopter -- but where is it going? Boyd still hasn't quite got it, though...
...while Tim tells Art he's sure the cars are rigged. He takes up a position as, up in the woods, Colton cautions Mort that Tim was an Army Rangers sniper, and if "you take the shot you now do not have and give away our position," Tim will have no trouble taking them both out. He may be exaggerating, but I'd rather he show Tim too much respect than too little. And speaking of shooting, Tim fires a couple rounds into one of the rigged vehicle's gas tanks, which starts to leak onto the road. I'd complain about the environment, but this is going to seem like nothing soon enough.
Back at the bar, Boyd finally has an epiphany, and asks Johnny and Ava what the most awesome thing was that happened to them in high school. It only takes Johnny about a quarter of a second to catch up, and Ava's there in a moment too: "The astronaut." Boyd explains that said astronaut that visited arrived in a helicopter that landed right on the baseball diamond, adding that the school is in a town that's "been empty ever since they consolidated." He concludes by telling Augustine that if he'll send Picker with him, they'll bring Shelby back dead or alive, and given how much I've been harping on it, you'll expect me to point out that Augustine doesn't seem to have a preference at this point. Augustine, after some thought, signs off, but Picker doesn't leave without telling Yolo to see if "uniform boy" knows anything about Raylan's group being at the high school. Obviously, this means that if you hadn't gotten your fill of people getting the shit beaten out of them, you're in luck.
What's less obvious is that we're going to be paying loose homage to Vic Vega from Reservoir Dogs, and Yolo ritualistically lays out a couple guns on an end table as The O'Jays' "Love Train" hilariously plays. Yolo introduces himself and asks if Bob knows what his moniker means, and Bob does, in fact: "You Only Live Once." Yolo confirms that before telling Bob that he says it when shit's about to get real, and guess what? Bob supposes that shit is indeed about to get real, and given how well he's doing on the quiz, I hope Yolo maybe pulls this first punch a little. After said initial impact, Yolo gives Bob the chance to tell him where "Drew" is, but Bob merely wonders if he's talking about "the doctor on TV." Heh. Yolo smirks and delivers two more punches -- the second of which the Foley guys would really like you to think breaks Bob's nose -- before repeating the question. Bob hems and haws, with blood flowing rather liberally, before asking, "Like Nancy Drew?" Hee. Yolo lets fly two body shots and a face punch before Bob starts to babble again, and Yolo swears he's about to really hurt him. Of course, Yolo doesn't know that Bob has heard those exact words more times than the number of stars he's currently seeing, so he's actually surprised when Bob eventually chokes out, "Drewbacca?" He starts tossing Bob around like a rag doll, as if the realtor weren't having enough trouble unloading the place, but after kicking him a few times, he seems impressed with Bob's resolve and tells him he'll let him catch his breath.
The music fades out, and I never did get a clear answer as to whether Yolo's playing it or it's just a soundtrack choice (if you're going to do the homage, the former seems stronger, but the way it plays makes the latter seem more likely); regardless, a couple more things happen, but as much as I appreciate a good homage, this scene is starting to feel a bit longer than it needs to be, so let's move ahead to Yolo kneeling down in front of Bob, getting a "Drewsitania," and kicking him a couple more times -- whereupon Bob stabs him in the thigh with a knife he apparently had concealed on him and just managed to retrieve. It looks like he hit the femoral artery, with the amount of blood that instantly appears, and all appropriate screaming ensues...
...as we see Raylan, in a pickup, speeding up to Arlo's, probably going to be just too late...
...as inside, Yolo tries to crawl over to his guns, but Bob, amid animalistic grunts, keeps grabbing at him from behind, causing Yolo in turn to flail wildly, knocking the guns off the table. Raylan gets out of the truck and hears a gunshot; when he enters, Yolo is lying dead (I hate when the hot ones die so quickly), with Bob, barely conscious, on top of him. Raylan gets a call from Art, who wants to know if Bob gave them up, but Bob tells Raylan he said nothing. Art informs Raylan that the Tonin copter just took off in his direction, so he needs to get the hell out of there. Raylan asks Bob if he can walk, but Bob says maybe Raylan should carry him, and Raylan, unsurprisingly given what just happened, looks like it'd be his pleasure. After all, they only have to go far enough to GET IN THE TRUCK!
After an establishing shot of a freight train, we hear its whistle in the distance as Raylan and Bob arrive at the school and Raylan asks Bob, "Drewbacca, huh?" Hee. Elsewhere, noting that Rachel's checking the time, Shelby tells her it's 5:30 -- the coal train's whistle indicates that. Not interested in a discussion of the Harlan institutions by which you can set your watch, Rachel tells him the helicopter will be there in fifteen minutes, and Shelby stoically replies that by six, he'll either be in the air or in heaven, "if that's the direction I'm headed, which I doubt." Rachel assures him he'll be in the air, and then, in response to an inquiring code whistle from Raylan, calls that they're good. Seeing Bob's face, Rachel asks what happened, and the sympathetic look on her face is a good indication of how messed up he looks, but Raylan merely replies, "What happened is Bob's a tough son of a bitch." Shelby gives up his chair, and I'm surprised there are no words exchanged between him and Bob given their apparent history, but they all have bigger concerns at the moment, as they hear a nearby chopper that they know can't be theirs.
Raylan sighs that they don't know how many men they're dealing with or how far they're willing to go -- they could bust through the windows, for example -- and while they could split up and put someone at every corner, there are four corners and only three of them. I'm no siege tactician, but I'm doubt even four of them could effectively defend every potential entrance, not to mention I'm not sure Bob can even see past his facial swelling at the moment, but this is all in aid of Shelby telling Raylan he can have four people if he likes -- he's capable of being the man he's seemed to be all this time, and given that this isn't the first time Shelby's talked this way, I think the question of whether he's become a good man may be answered once and for all by season's end. Raylan asks what Shelby's thinking, so he suggests they go to the roof "and pick off any who dare approach." Seems like a tall order against an air assault, given their limited weaponry, but Raylan asks if he's better with a rifle or a shotgun. Shelby tells him either is fine, thanks, whereupon Raylan stops indulging him and tells Rachel that this is Shelby's angle. He "informs" Shelby that he's a criminal, and he's on the other side from them. "Now I don't like arguin' with you, but I ain't handin' you a goddamn gun." It's too bad Raylan and Shelby won't have more time to spend together, because their relationship could be fascinatingly complex; among other things, Shelby can give Raylan insight into Arlo without actually being Arlo, almost like a far less disappointing and abusive father figure. But again, there are more pressing concerns to worry about, as Rachel asks about Tim and Art, and Raylan tells her they're still trapped...
...but not for long, as Tim is preparing a Molotov cocktail with which he plans to detonate the explosives in one of the cars from a safe distance. Art remarks that he hasn't seen one of those "since that Guns 'n' Roses concert in 1989," as if I needed any more reasons to wish for an Art prequel.
Back at the school, Raylan sets Bob up in an office and says he's going to go have a word with the enemy. He gives Bob "Yoda's" gun (hee, and after "Drewbacca" you can't blame him for going to the Star Wars franchise) and tells him not to shoot unless he has to. Bob asks for clarification on that point, getting this reply: "You see you're gonna die if you don't? Pull the trigger." Sound enough advice. With a grin, he tells Bob to stay frosty and then walks to the stairway and asks if that's Boyd. From below, we see that it is indeed, accompanied by an armed Picker, and after they take up a camera-friendly position around the turn of the stairs from each other, the three of them chat for a bit, with Raylan showing he followed along with Boyd's thought process by asking the name of "that astronaut." Heh.
Picker gets impatient with Raylan and Boyd trying to out-drawl each other, so Boyd asks Raylan if he won't hand Shelby over to "these... well, I won't say 'nice' people" (hee) and save them both a whole lot of trouble. Raylan, I'm sure you'll be surprised to hear, isn't so much amenable to this idea, and warns them that not only is he not giving them Shelby, but any further progression on their part will result in them having "a bad afternoon." He invites them to come back with more men, promising that he won't be hard to find, and after he withdraws, Picker tells Boyd that if Raylan wants "Butch and Sundance," he'll get it. Boyd sighs that Raylan is usually "a little more fair-minded," and I'm not sure I'd agree with that, but either way, a showdown has been promised. Upstairs, Raylan rejoins Bob and tells him he probably bought them about five minutes, but then they'll have to deal with a lot more people. Bob decides that in that case, he'd better make some pre-death speech, but Raylan tells him not to, and Bob doesn't press the issue. Fair enough -- if Bob dies, it seems pretty unlikely that Raylan won't go with him.
Back on the road, Tim is bitching about "four cars and not one goddamn cigarette lighter that isn't being used to charge a goddamn cell phone." Heh. Welcome to the modern world, Tim. Art can't believe that none of them smoke, either: "This is Kentucky, not Sausalito. What's wrong with you people?" As we'll see, this is just another reason why Ava should be kept around, which I already felt on general principles. Tim, however, proves that he'd be a good Survivor contestant in producing a spark by grinding metal on metal, and with the cocktail lit, there's a funny back-and-forth about who's going to throw it before Art heaves the thing and strikes pay dirt, which is why he gets paid the medium-sized bucks. The gas burns for several seconds without anything happening, and Art starts to get to his feet, but Tim warns him not to. Thinking the errand has failed, Art sighs and starts talking, but of course you can't say the word "explosion" on TV without immediately causing one, and the car duly goes up in a pretty impressive fireball that, among other things, shows Tim was right to be cautious here.
With their way unblocked, the marshals waste no time in getting back in their vehicles and making to take flight, and Colton tells Mort they should do the same -- until he claims to spot Shelby. Mort takes aim but doesn't see him, and after Colton tells him where to look, he impatiently grabs the gun and lines up a shot himself -- only to tell Mort that he was right before shooting him dead. And I wonder if Colton is going off-book here or if he and Boyd had discussed this eventuality -- the latter seems much more likely -- but just as much, I wonder if the writers were having etymological fun by naming a doomed character "Mort."
Back at the bar, Ava asks Augustine if she can get him anything, and proceeds to chat gregariously about how she's going to have a smoke, even though she hasn't indulged in some time. Augustine remains silent, but after she lights up, Ava keeps babbling about smoking and its effects until Augustine asks her why she's talking. Simultaneously recognizing that this is dangerous ground and being offended by his aggressive tone, Ava chooses to remain silent, but Augustine isn't done, asking her how many dicks one needs to suck to get to the top of the food chain there. Given how awful he's being, it's just as well he doesn't have the ammunition of knowing about the sex parties on Clover Hill. It's not worth recapping in its entirety, so let's just say Augustine uses some form of "dick" eleven times to make his point that "a small-time blonde girl like you" had to do something to gain charge of the whorehouse. Given his vocation, I wonder if he'd treat her with more respect if he knew she murdered the last proprietor. Johnny's obviously offended at the love of his life being talked to like this, but Ava evenly tells Augustine she's a businesswoman. He smirks and wonders if that means she attaches herself to whatever guy gets her what she wants, and after a retreat to the arena of fellatio, he tells her Boyd has the heart of a champion and is willing to do whatever it takes to realize his dreams -- but what about her?
Ava grabs a brandy before deliberately sashaying over to sit with Augustine as he notes that she really loves Boyd before wondering if he got her ring from "one of those claw machines at Denny's." Come on, Augustine, Boyd has money. He could pay someone to work one of those machines. Johnny is seething, but Ava continues to be a total pro even as Augustine tells Ava to show him her tits. This is too much for Johnny, who tells Augustine to shut up, and Augustine takes a moment to absorb this before asking Johnny if he's serious. You see -- and I wasn't expecting this -- Augustine is fully aware of Johnny having gone to Wynn behind Boyd's back, and Ava is aware of a shift in the winds as she asks what's going on. After some more silent tension and guilty looks, Ava figures out the broad strokes even before Augustine gleefully announces that Johnny "made his play" by going to Wynn. "Guys don't have to really suck dicks to get what they want. They just need to betray someone." More in the interest of wrapping this up than keeping it classy, I'm going to let that one go.
Ava asks if all this talk is indicative of Augustine's desire for a blowjob, and he's like, yes please, so she slides forward on her knees and wonders if she's hitched her jaw to the wrong star -- only to throw her brandy in his face, light her Zippo, and hold it an inch away from him. And it's hard to type when I keep pumping my fists, but obviously she had this planned from the moment she ordered the brandy -- its high alcohol content would be sure to ignite. She then relieves him of his weapon and holds it an inch from his face as she removes the lighter, but Johnny begs her not to do it and does the best he can to remain in Detroit's good graces by holding his own gun on her. Ava retargets him as she wonders if he's going to shoot her, and Augustine hilariously side-eyes the two of them like he's watching a tennis match with a stiff neck. Johnny tells Ava he loves her, and he'll have to take a mop to the sarcasm from her response of "Aw, that's sweet." She departs, whereupon Augustine remarks, "I see what you like about her." Damn straight, guy. Now suck a dick.
After a quick montage of Boyd's now rather larger group moving silently through the darkened auditorium and up the stairs, the group pauses in front of the principal's office. With the door now closed, Picker tells Boyd to open it, but Boyd elects to call Raylan's name, and the two of them exchange banter laced with menace that concludes with Raylan inviting Boyd to come on in. Boyd tells Picker that what Raylan means is he'll shoot whoever comes through the door, and Picker's like, "Your point?" It's hard to say that response was unpredictable, Boyd, swimming with sharks as you are. Having few good options, Boyd elects to appeal to his "old friend," saying that they've got him outnumbered, and it's all on the line. Raylan: "Meanin' they want you to come through first?" Hee. Picker gives Boyd ten seconds to do just that, which he starts counting down, but when Raylan asks Boyd if he has any last words, Boyd thinks something's amiss -- this isn't like Raylan, and what's more, Shelby isn't in there. With Picker down to one, Raylan elects to save Boyd's life by opening the door a crack and telling the group that Boyd is right -- Shelby isn't in there, and hasn't been for some time. In this case, "some time" is probably about ten minutes, but that information is certainly need-to-know at this point. Raylan invites the group to come in and take a look, as long as they do it very slowly, and when they comply, they find Raylan and Bob seated and covering them. Picker asks who Bob is, prompting Raylan to introduce him as "the man who killed Yoo-Hoo," and I can tell you the ten-year-old me would have deemed that particular crime punishable by death. Picker gives Bob a disbelieving look, to which Raylan replies, "People underestimate Bob at their peril," and I certainly won't argue that after this episode.
Picker asks what happens now, and Boyd is certainly interested in that topic, given that his life may depend on the answer. Raylan supposes they're going to threaten to kill Bob and him if they don't say where Shelby is, but he goes on that "Bob looks the way he does 'cause he wouldn't talk," so he can hardly do any different. He goes on that they could actually kill him and Bob, only that might lead to other problems for them, a point that's emphasized by the siren sounds and helicopter noise that indicate Raylan's backup has arrived. And by the way, I've noted with some disbelief what little time this season has spanned, but it's worth noting that this episode upped the bar by nearly taking place in real time, and it didn't need some flashy (and false) countdown clock to do it. Raylan wraps it up by suggesting they be on their way, "and just promise me that we'll get together and do this again someday." Picker looks like he might argue the point, but Boyd starts to walk away, and when asked what he's doing, he explains that killing marshals isn't what he signed up for. Picker suggests they could just kill him, which probably isn't the best idea to chat about in front of lawmen, but Boyd counters that "your god" has much bigger problems than Boyd at the moment. Well, that's true, and yet I have the feeling that if Tonin were here, he wouldn't hesitate to kill Boyd himself. As Boyd walks away, Raylan calls for him to promise too, which Boyd does...
...and then we see the marshals rushing the place, only to find Raylan and Bob alone, and Raylan explains that the group left quickly -- they were "smart enough to know they'd lost." When Art sees Bob's face, he says that he thought he'd had a day of it before asking where Shelby is, and Raylan invites Bob to tell him, since it was his idea. Bob tells Art that you'd think you need a car or a helicopter to get out of Harlan, but that's not the case...
...and then we cut to Rachel and Shelby, speeding out of town on the coal train just like two enterprising hobos might. I may be concerned for Rachel's safety, not because of Shelby but the people after him, but that doesn't mean I didn't love this ending. See you week.
John Ramos is a writer and film producer living in Los Angeles. His new film, a documentary on online privacy and the sale of personal data called Terms And Conditions May Apply, recently premiered at the Slamdance Film Festival in January. You can get news on it from the film's Twitter account. Also, you can email John at couchbaron@gmail.com, follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/couchbaron, or check out his blog, "Pull Up A Chair," which he'd just love for you to stop by.
Picker asks what happens now, and Boyd is certainly interested in that topic, given that his life may depend on the answer. Raylan supposes they're going to threaten to kill Bob and him if they don't say where Shelby is, but he goes on that "Bob looks the way he does 'cause he wouldn't talk," so he can hardly do any different. He goes on that they could actually kill him and Bob, only that might lead to other problems for them, a point that's emphasized by the siren sounds and helicopter noise that indicate Raylan's backup has arrived. And by the way, I've noted with some disbelief what little time this season has spanned, but it's worth noting that this episode upped the bar by nearly taking place in real time, and it didn't need some flashy (and false) countdown clock to do it. Raylan wraps it up by suggesting they be on their way, "and just promise me that we'll get together and do this again someday." Picker looks like he might argue the point, but Boyd starts to walk away, and when asked what he's doing, he explains that killing marshals isn't what he signed up for. Picker suggests they could just kill him, which probably isn't the best idea to chat about in front of lawmen, but Boyd counters that "your god" has much bigger problems than Boyd at the moment. Well, that's true, and yet I have the feeling that if Tonin were here, he wouldn't hesitate to kill Boyd himself. As Boyd walks away, Raylan calls for him to promise too, which Boyd does...
...and then we see the marshals rushing the place, only to find Raylan and Bob alone, and Raylan explains that the group left quickly -- they were "smart enough to know they'd lost." When Art sees Bob's face, he says that he thought he'd had a day of it before asking where Shelby is, and Raylan invites Bob to tell him, since it was his idea. Bob tells Art that you'd think you need a car or a helicopter to get out of Harlan, but that's not the case...
...and then we cut to Rachel and Shelby, speeding out of town on the coal train just like two enterprising hobos might. I may be concerned for Rachel's safety, not because of Shelby but the people after him, but that doesn't mean I didn't love this ending. See you week.
John Ramos is a writer and film producer living in Los Angeles. His new film, a documentary on online privacy and the sale of personal data called Terms And Conditions May Apply, recently premiered at the Slamdance Film Festival in January. You can get news on it from the film's Twitter account. Also, you can email John at couchbaron@gmail.com, follow him on Twitter at https://twitter.com/couchbaron, or check out his blog, "Pull Up A Chair," which he'd just love for you to stop by.