Rob "Sodapop" Lowe is jogging while wearing an unfortunate stocking cap. Meanwhile, there's a building in another part of town, with the words Lyon, LaCrosse, and Levine inscribed on the front. Hey, there's a guy on the building ledge! Don't jump, guy! But Rob is still running, and now we see that he is running away from the White House. Oh, for crying out loud. We get it. You're not Sam Seaborn anymore. Meanwhile, the guy on the ledge turns and looks back into the room, fear on his face. Rob is still running, in slow motion. Now he too turns and looks over his shoulder. Oh, no! The guy is falling off the ledge! Did he jump? Was he pushed? Who the hell was that guy?
You know, if Rob Lowe really wanted to distance himself from The West Wing, maybe he could have found a show that wasn't set in Washington and he didn't play a lawyer. I think he would have fit in well in the Ted McGinley role on Hope & Faith. Hey, Ted McGinley was on another Sorkin show -- Sports Night. Maybe a TGIF sitcom will be Rob's fate in a few years. There are worse things that could happen. Like brain cancer.
Rob (which is what I'm going to call him until they reveal his character's name) jogs up to a storefront-type office. The sign on the door lets us know that this office is the home of the Lyon, LaCrosse and Levine Inner City Law Center Offering Free Legal Services. I hope they don't have to pay by the word for their Yellow Pages listing because that's a mouthful. Rob enters the office building and a rumpled guy calls him "Carl Lewis." After some banter about Rob being all healthy and virtuous while Rumpled Guy (played by Matt Craven) is eating a donut, Rob asks Rumpled Guy what he's got going on today. Rumpled Guy has "rape and murder" and Rob has "a client seeking political asylum." Rumpled Guy thinks that sounds boring, but I'd take political asylum over rape and murder any day. Rob agrees with me and heads further into the offices.
The bedroom of a nice apartment. Kyle "I'm The Bad Guy" Chandler asks Elizabeth "I'm Not Playing A Lesbian This Time -- Or Am I?" Mitchell to come back to bed. She says that she's got to go to an AA meeting because she's in charge of the coffee. Yeah, those AA people get surly without their coffee, I hear. Kyle asks why she would want to spend the morning with "a bunch of drunks" when she could spend it with him. So he's not exactly sensitive. Elizabeth purses her lips and looks disappointed. Kyle's cell phone rings. He checks the Caller ID and answers, making excuses about how he fell asleep at work. Unless his office is in Elizabeth Mitchell's bed, I have to assume that he's lying to a girlfriend or wife about his whereabouts. He's also making no effort to shield Elizabeth from his phone conversation, so she clearly knows the score. Elizabeth pulls on her clothes and starts to leave the room. As she scurries out, Kyle whispers that he'll see her at the office.
Rob -- now showered and dressed after his jog -- walks into a different office building. But not either of the two office buildings we've already seen in the first five minutes of the episode. Some dude wearing an African print hat asks Rob to wait there. Rob looks around and notices that just about everyone working in the office is non-white. Since they took the time to show us this, I assume it's important. A woman walks up to Rob and calls him Jack. Finally! So Rob is now Jack. Just so we're on the same page there. Jack seems happy to see the woman, and he calls her "Robin Petrie." She is beautiful, and has a lovely British accent. She informs Jack that she goes by Nwamaka now. She seems more amused than annoyed by him, though. Jack pauses and then tries unsuccessfully to pronounce her name (it's Nuh-WAH-ma-ka). She corrects him and he sort of gets it as she explains that it's her African name. Oh, she's one of those. I'm totally kidding, by the way. It just reminded me of when one of my students asked me what my new last name was after I got married, and I told him I was keeping my name and he said, "Oh, you're one of those." Jack's reaction is less obvious, but sort of similar as he says, "Never easy. Just like you." Yes, because changing her name was definitely meant to piss off Whitey. Shut up, Jack. Nwamaka says she'll take it as a compliment, and Jack says that she should.
Nwamaka leads Jack into her office. As they walk, Jack asks why they need him if they already have her. Nwamaka introduces Jack to a woman sitting in her office, wearing traditional African dress and holding an infant. The woman's name is Chinyere Adeyemi. Boy, if Jack couldn't say Nwamaka, he's never going to get that one. Jack compliments the baby girl, and Chinyere says that the baby's name is Akanke, which means "a blessing on the world." Jack says that she is definitely that. He doesn't even know her! Maybe she's colicky! Chinyere asks Jack if he can help them. Nwamaka explains, "What's happened to Chinyere -- what is happening to countless other women in Nigeria under the Islamic court of Sharia -- is unspeakable." Yes, exactly. I'm ignorant. I have no idea what that means. Chinyere says that everyone in their region is devoted to Islam. Nwamaka adds that what's going on has nothing to do with religion and everything to do with politics. So what happened to her? Are they going to tell us? Was she kicked out because she had a baby?
Jack says that he has zero interest in politics (zing to The West Wing! Except not really) and she has a big problem, because she's petitioning for political asylum, and has entered the country illegally. Nwamaka points out that Chinyere will die if she is sent back. Jack isn't swayed, as he says that Nwamaka's organization "prejudiced immigration officials against [Chinyere's] petition." Nwamaka looks pissed and says that they both know there are ways around that. Jack nods uneasily. Nwamaka says that she's always been honest with him, and that she recommended him to Chinyere because of his "connections in the government." Like his connection to President Bartlet? Jack looks angry as he gathers his things and says that he's a lawyer and not a PR consultant. Chinyere asks tearily what will happen to her daughter. She explains that the man who raped her and left her for dead didn't even look at her, and that she wanted to die from shame, but then she had her daughter, and it was a blessing. Chinyere wonders who will care for her daughter when Chinyere is executed for "adultery -- a crime [she] did not commit." Jack looks chagrined, and realizes he was kind of an asshole there. Oh, and his last name is Turner. Jack says that he can only represent her in the best way he knows how, and that he makes no promises. Nwamaka tosses a wink at Chinyere, who grins.
Superior Court of the District of Columbia. A bailiff reads out the details of the case before the court. Samuel Gentry has been charged with rape and murder in the first degree. The judge asks for a plea, and Rumpled Man (who is named Riley) runs in and says that the plea is not guilty. After some back-and-forth about his tardiness, Riley says he's taking over Gentry's case and had faxed a notice to the judge. She didn't get it, and sets the preliminary proceedings for two weeks out. Riley wants to discuss bail, but the judge tells him to "get a grip," because it's a capital offense. I want to be a judge, mostly so I could bang my gavel and tell people to get a grip. Riley argues that the defendant poses no flight risk due to "his diminished capacity," but the judge interrupts and denies bail. Judges get to interrupt all of the time, too. That would be awesome. Gentry's ousted lawyer accuses Riley of taking the case just for the headlines. Riley shoots back that he's in it to effect justice. Riley introduces himself to Sam Gentry, his new client, who is obviously mentally diminished in some way. Sam's brother Larry rushes up and introduces himself to Riley as well. Larry is worried that Riley will cost too much, but Riley assures him that it's pro bono. Riley wants to talk to both Sam and Larry separately. Larry wants to be present for Sam's interview, which Riley doesn't want, but Larry says that Sam is already scared and doesn't need more stress. Riley says that if Sam's okay with it, he is too, and he hurries out the door.
Back at Lyon, LaCrosse and Levine (which I'm just going to go ahead and call Triple L): bystanders, reporters, and cops are gathered around the splattered remains of the leaper. A distinguished gentleman ["played by James Pickens Jr., a.k.a. Kersh from The X-Files" -- Wing Chun] looks on. A cop, Detective Traub, walks up to the distinguished gentleman and calls him Mr. Christianson. I like when we find out their names within seconds of their first appearance. Christianson says that it's all very sad, and that he can confirm that the victim is "Daniel Barrington, [the law firm's] managing partner, and [his] good, good friend." Traub wants to ask some questions, and Christianson brushes him off, telling Traub to call his secretary for an appointment. Traub looks like that's not the first time he's gotten the brush-off that day.
Kyle is in his office at Triple L, and pulls a fresh shirt out of his desk drawer. His assistant (played by Frances Fisher) walks in and tells him that the senior partners are meeting in Christianson's office, and that the place is crawling with cops. Kyle derides her efforts at "intelligence-gathering," and calls her "worthless." Frances doesn't even flinch as she calls him a bastard. Kyle tells her that she's fired and Frances flatly says, "Oh, no. Not again. Whatever will I do?" I think these are my two favorite characters on the show. Kyle calls Frances a "tough old bitch," and she retorts, "Sweet talk will get you nowhere." She reminds him (and calls him "Grant"! Finally!) that Barrington is dead, and that the entire firm is in a state of shock, even her. Hey, when did Grant take off his shirt? Yay! Grant says he just wants Barrington's office. Just his office? Not his job and salary and perks too? Frances seems surprised, and Grant tells her that "Harvard means something around here." As opposed to the rest of the world, where Harvard is completely meaningless. Frances walks out, but not before making fun of Grant's shirt.
Jack returns to the clinic, where his assistant runs up and says she's been trying to reach him all morning because Christianson's office has been calling every five minutes. She gets Jack's full attention and tells him sadly that Barrington committed suicide by jumping from his office window. Triple L wants Jack there now. Jack looks as you would expect: stunned, sad, and nauseated. He asks where Riley is, and the assistant says he's at the courthouse. Jack says Riley should know as he walks off.
Jack stands in front of Triple L, watching a worker hose down the Barrington remnants from the sidewalk. Man, that method of suicide really makes a big Fuck You statement, doesn't it? Jack walks into the offices, which are practically gold-plated. The receptionist says that Christianson is waiting for Jack in his office. To give us some idea of how rarely he goes to the main Triple L offices, we learn that Jack isn't even sure what floor that's on.
Jack arrives on the twelfth floor, and the place is crawling with cops, including Detective Traub. Jack and Traub seem to know each other -- or at least Traub knows who Jack is -- but they don't speak. Jack is shown into Christianson's office. Christianson expresses sympathy and then tells Jack to join the meeting in progress. A bunch of old white guys are sitting down, and Jack joins them. The younger members of the firm (including Grant) are standing around the edges of the room. Christianson makes a speech about how Barrington didn't leave a note or a clue, but that he was under pressure because Zero Limited Technologies was indicted by the Justice Department. Jack speaks up to ask what Christianson means, and Christianson says that there were "improprieties." Jack can't believe Christianson is suggesting that Barrington was involved, and reminds everyone that Barrington was his Ethics professor. Grant pipes up, "Like that would make a difference." Hey, who asked you, Grant? And why did you put your shirt back on? Jack quietly says, "Oh, hello, Grant. I didn't see you skulking in the corner over there." So those two clearly know and dislike each other. Christianson says that the media is already trying to find scandal. Jack says that they should let them try. Why is Jack the main focus of this meeting? Aren't there, like, two hundred other bigwigs?
Christianson thinks that they should continue with the firm's business by choosing a new managing partner -- one who is beyond reproach and a worthy successor to Barrington. Didn't Christianson just finish suggesting that Barrington's hands were dirty? Anyway, Christianson says that Jack is the only logical choice. Jack seems surprised. Grant looks pissed. Jack clears his throat; he says that it's bizarre and that he can't accept the offer. Christianson doesn't understand. Jack asks for a reality check; he reminds everyone that he only enters the building to steal office supplies, and that there are many others more qualified. Jack asks if this is about his name. Christianson expositions, "You're twice winner of the Hogarth Humanitarian Award, editor-in-chief of Yale Law Journal. You clerked for Justice Souter, for God's sakes." Don't forget that time he rescued the kitten from a tree and caught the man who mugged an old lady! Christianson admits that the Turner name doesn't hurt. He reminds Jack that he was allowed to practice law the way he wanted to for many years, and now he should return the favor. Jack says that he has a full-time job at the clinic, and starts to walk out. Christianson says that there might not be a clinic. Jack stops and asks if that's a threat. Christianson is just pointing out a possibility. Oh, just take out your dicks and measure them, already. Jack says it'll generate more bad publicity for the firm. Christianson takes a few steps forward and asks if that's a threat. Jack says, "Yes. It is." And then Christianson's like, "Oh, is it?" And Jack's like, "You know it." And Christianson's like, "Oh, no you di-in't!" And Jack's like, "Bring it!" And then they make out. And then Grant takes his shirt off again. Okay, or maybe the scene ended, like, five minutes ago and I'm just amusing myself here.
Grant and Frances walk out of Triple L. Grant asks who "that weasel Turner thinks he is." Frances expositions, "Other than the son of Senator H.M. Turner, partner emeritus and chairman of the Judiciary Committee, you mean?" Grant whines about not getting the managing-partner job. France says it's not a disaster, it's a challenge, and offers her advice. Grant asks what it will cost him, and Frances says they'll discuss it later. Hmm, what does that mean? Grant says he does want it, and hurries after Frances as she hustles off.
Jack is back at the clinic, discussing the day's events with Riley, who is shocked by Barrington's death. Jack says that Christianson threatened to shut them down, and Riley thinks that now that Barrington's dead, Christianson will seize the chance to "torch this place down." Jack's assistant tells him that "that Nigerian woman with the unpronounceable name" is on line one. Riley tells that assistant (Kathy!) that the name is Nwamaka's heritage, so Kathy should be able to pronounce it. Kathy smarts back that she's "fourth-generation Bronx," and points out that Riley is Irish, and then asks how his Gaelic is these days. Go, Kathy! Jack takes the call, then tells Riley, "The INS, or whatever the hell they're calling it now, just picked up my client."
Detective Traub walks in and tells Kathy that he's looking for Jack. Traub spots Riley and Jack walking out. Riley greets him, and Traub says he needs to ask Jack about Barrington. Jack says he has a client emergency, but Kathy will set him up with an appointment. Remarkably similar to Christianson's response, no? Riley tells Traub that Barrington was "one of the good guys." Traub calls after them that someone will have to talk to him eventually. He's a cop. Can't he haul them downtown or something? Briscoe would already have an indictment.
At Triple L, David Krumholtz (who I can't stop picturing in his underwear belting out show tunes in Slums of Beverly Hills, which disturbs me) and some other paralegals make morbid jokes about Barrington's death. The boss (it's Jesse, Andrea's hubby from !) asks Fineman (Krumholtz) what he's doing. Jesse tells him to get back to work. Another paralegal asks how they're supposed to work "when partners are jumping out of windows." Jesse says that they're paralegals, and that they don't concern themselves with what goes on upstairs. Anyone feel like Fineman's soon going to concern himself with what goes on upstairs? Elizabeth Mitchell (Ariel! The character names are coming fast and furious now! And also, "Ariel"? The hell?) charges in and asks Fineman about a particular case. They banter, and he promises to get the case to her within the hour. Ariel starts to mermaid off, and Fineman asks her if she wants to go to the Kurosawa retrospective with him that night. She wonders if he's asking her out, and seems flattered. Fineman asks if she's too good to date a paralegal now. Ariel says that she wouldn't date Fineman when she was one of his fellow paralegals, and that it's nothing personal. Yeah, she only dates evil lawyers named Grant. I think the word "dates" should be in quotation marks in that sentence to indicate irony. Fineman acts like he doesn't care, but he clearly does. Ariel leaves.
Riley talks to Larry, brother of the defendant in the rape/murder case. And he's not just Sam's brother; he's Sam's identical twin brother. Wow, I wonder if that will be relevant later. Larry insists that Sam is innocent. Sam says that he did it, and provides a pretty detailed explanation of how he accomplished it, albeit in a very Lenny-from- Of-Mice- and-Men fashion. Larry insists that Sam doesn't know what he's talking about, and that Sam always tells exactly the same story about all women. Sam's alibi is that he was home with Larry, watching the Redskins play the Eagles. Riley asks Sam whether that's true. Sam looks at his brother and then nods. Riley speaks to Larry privately and explains that he's not a credible witness, and that the evidence is stacked against them. Larry asks about that, and Riley says that Sam's confession, plus the neighbor's testimony that he was always hanging around the victim's apartment, won't help. Larry asks about a DNA test. Riley doesn't like them, because once it's done, they can't undo it if they don't like the results. ["Huh? Don't investigators do DNA tests as a matter of course? And if Sam had been arrested, wouldn't the prosecution have supoenaed his DNA already? Have C.S.I. and Law & Order lied to me?" -- Wing Chun] Larry wants one anyway, because Sam won't make it in jail. Riley agrees to order a DNA test in the morning.
Jack meets with the Nigerian ambassador. Jack insists that Chinyere will be executed if she is forced to return to Nigeria. The ambassador disagrees, because Nigeria is one of the oldest democracies in Africa. Jack says that, even so, "women are routinely executed in a barbaric fashion for questionable offenses." Hey, you know how to get on someone's good side and win favors? Insult his country! Good one, Jack. The ambassador says that no one in the U.S. can judge another country's methods of execution. Point to the ambassador. Jack spouts some legal mumbo jumbo about what he'll do. You all don't expect me to look that up, do you? The ambassador says that Chinyere isn't eligible for asylum since she's an illegal immigrant and a convicted felon. Jack says that Chinyere isn't a felon. The ambassador has her conviction papers. Jack says the conviction was obtained without due process and by the government that is persecuting her. The ambassador points out that Nigeria is not on the U.N.'s list of oppressive regimes. Jack disagrees, as he gathers his things to leave. The ambassador tells Jack to give his best to the Senator. Jack looks back sharply.
Fineman walks down a hall. He spots Grant and Ariel arguing behind a door. Grant walks out and Ariel follows shortly after, trying to pretend nothing happened. Fineman comments, "Consorting with Satan's spawn." Ariel curtly asks what he wants. Fineman has the file she requested, as well as some takeout. Ariel seems emotionally drained as she asks Fineman to leave her alone. She gets on the elevator. Does anyone think he's going to leave her alone? Yeah, me neither.
That night, Jack walks up to his brownstone (a word I can't say without thinking of General Hospital) and finds Riley sitting on the stoop. Riley says he got a phone call from a friend at Triple L saying that Christianson is definitely shutting down the clinic. Jack thinks Christianson is bluffing. Riley says he heard that Jack could have prevented it if he took the job of managing partner. Jack allows that it's true, but insists that it was a setup. A setup for what? Riley is pissed. Jack says that Triple L has no interest in having him manage anything, and that Christianson just wants to use him as "a face man while he mops up the Zero Tech debacle." Well, if you need a face man, you could do a lot worse than Rob Lowe. His face is pretty. Riley yells at Jack to stop thinking about himself for a minute, because they have cases pending and real people to consider. Jack starts to walk off, but Riley pushes him back and adds that he has a family to support. Jack thinks they'll be fine. Easy for you to say, trust-fund boy. Riley wants Jack to tell Christianson that he's changed his mind. Jack refuses. Riley says, "Then why don't you just go down to the county morgue and piss all over Dan Barrington's body! Because it amounts to the same damn thing!" So Jack turns and shoves Riley right into the garbage pile on the curb! Damn, Jack has been working out! Riley really went flying there. Riley gets up and shoves Jack back and yells that Barrington was like a brother to him (and that Jack is "a little trust-fund brat," which I totally called a few minutes earlier). They tussle some more, and Jack says that Barrington was like a father to him. Least effective fight ever, by the way. They're basically just holding each other by the lapels, and then they somehow both stumble and fall into the garbage. Also, who gets in a fistfight while sober past the age of, like, twenty? Jack and Riley both get up slowly, avoiding each other's eyes. Riley starts to walk off, and then stops as if to say something. He changes his mind and walks off, for real this time.
Ariel walks into the clinic to see Jack, who asks what she's doing there. Way to be welcoming. Ariel says that Grant bumped her off a case because they had "different ideas of what a working relationship should be." Jack isn't surprised. Ariel says that she has "a huge gap" in her workload, so she thought she'd offer to help him. Jack says that they could use the help, so he'll catch her up on what they're doing. But first, he pours her some coffee, which he remembers that she takes black with two cubes of sugar. When's the last time you saw an actual cube of sugar? What a weird thing to say. Ariel seems touched that he remembers. They share a look. She notices the scrape on Jack's hand from his big fight, and he says that he tripped. Riley rolls up right about then and says hello. Jack reintroduces Ariel to Riley. She notices the scrape on his face from the big fight, and Riley also says he tripped. Ariel says that the place must be more dangerous than she imagined. Riley says, "You have no idea," and gives Jack the stink-eye.
Riley visits Larry at his job, working in a kitchen somewhere. Riley says that the DA is willing to discuss a plea bargain for Sam. Larry asks why, and Riley says it could be because of his reputation, but more likely it's because "they understand that once they put [Sam] on the stand, they haven't got a prayer." Riley thinks it'll be voluntary manslaughter, which means ten to fifteen years of jail time. Larry asks about the DNA test, and Riley asks whether Larry really thinks his brother is innocent. Larry doesn't answer the question, but instead launches into a story about how Sam was always the smart one until they were in a car accident that killed their parents, left Sam brain-damaged, and left Larry without a scratch. So Larry has survivor's guilt. Riley stands there with a hangdog expression.
Detective Traub walks into the paralegal department at Triple L and asks Fineman to point him toward Charlie. Fineman says, "He's the one with the cowlick, sucking on a piece of hay." Charlie looks about twelve years old. Detective Traub is psyched that someone is finally going to talk to him, as Charlie starts giving out information. Jesse rolls up and puts a stop to it because none of them is authorized to discuss anything. Traub is pissed, and asks whether anyone at the firm is familiar with obstruction of justice. Jesse folds his arms and looks stern, and Traub leaves.
Frances (will they ever tell me her character's name?) invites Charlie into Grant's office. She explains that Grant had to step out, and asks Charlie where he's from. He's from Montana. So is she! Charlie is all excited. Frances asks about his ambitions, and Charlie says he's a country-western musician. So he moved to Washington instead of Nashville or Memphis or something? Good move, Charlie. Frances invites him to lunch. Charlie is worried about his workload, but Frances says she's cleared it with Jesse. Charlie isn't sure what this is all about. Frances says that she needs his help, and suggests that maybe she can find a way to help him back. She says that last part real sexy-like, and even though she's of a certain age, I think it works on old Charlie.
Jack and Ariel go to Nwamaka's office. Nwamaka is pissed that the "TSA" (which I thought was the new name of INS, but I looked it up and now it's BCIS, so who knows what that means) won't let Chinyere see her own child. Jack says that he's handling it. Nwamaka says that the authorities want to make an example of Chinyere -- that her family has received death threats, and that she'll be deported in two weeks. She asks Jack what he'll do. He starts to answer, and Nwamaka interrupts pointedly, "What are you going to do?" They stare at each other, and Jack quietly says that nothing will happen to Chinyere.
In a cab, Ariel asks about the charges against Chinyere. Jack says she's been charged with adultery. Ariel is surprised that adultery is a capital offense in Nigeria. Jack says, "It is in an Islamic court that has the same powers as a secular one. The government's predominantly Christian-controlled. They're not exactly looking to rock the boat." Ariel asks about the method of execution. Jack says that Chinyere's hands and feet will be tied, and that she'll be put at the bottom of an eight-foot pit. Then a bulldozer will push thousands of pounds of rocks on top of her. Yikes. Jack says it's all because she was raped by a village elder and gave birth to a girl. Ariel says that's another reason to be grateful for her life. "And how is your life?" Jack asks in an awkward segue." No, he really said that. Eesh. I'm not sure if that's bad writing, or if the writers are trying to make Jack out to be a douche. Ariel says that she has good and bad days, and some really bad days, but that she's been sober for five years. Jack always knew she'd get it together. Ariel says, "When they drag you from your dorm room in a straitjacket, screaming at the top of your lungs that your cat's trying to kill you, it doesn't exactly inspire confidence in your peers." Well, that bit of backstory is interesting. Was she on drugs? Crazy? Both? Ariel asks how Jack is doing, and whether he's still seeing Jennifer. Jack says that they broke up, and that it was his fault. Ariel says she's sorry, and asks what he's going to do about Chinyere. Jack says that he has one card left to play.
Jack meets up with Artie from The Larry Sanders Show in a restaurant. Why, is he going to book Chinyere on Larry's show to get publicity? Oh, that's his dad, the Senator. Jack greets him semi-warmly. The Senator yells to the waiter to bring some Scotch, even though Jack insists that he's fine. Jack gets a look on his face like this has happened before, a lot. It's that look you get around your parents when you realize that no matter how old you get, they're still going to treat you like you're in the second grade. The Senator asks Jack if he's still running, and then launches into a soliloquy about how daily exercise is the only way to go. The Senator asks why they don't see each other more often. Jack says it's because they don't like each other very much. The Senator laughs and says that it was "spoken true, like a Turner." The Senator offers his condolences on Barrington's death. Jack accepts a drink. Heh. The Senator asks the waiter to give them some privacy. As soon as the waiter leaves, The Senator asks Jack what he wants. Jack says he has a client seeking political asylum, and briefly outlines the case. The Senator launches into a bunch of Latin indicating what legal actions Jack should take. Jack's responses are just as quick, proving that his legal mind is as sharp s his father's. Jack says that the only hope is a Presidential intervention. The Senator's like, "Sure! No biggie." Jack says he wouldn't ask if he thought there was any other way. The Senator demeans Jack's work as "fighting for Jill and Joe Six-Pack." Jack should have said, "If you mean the good people who elected you into office, then yes." Instead, he's silent. The Senator wants to eat, but Jack wants to leave. The Senator basically commands Jack to stay and orders his meal for him, to boot.
Grant eats at his desk and asks Ariel what she's got. She says she's got nothing, since she's only been there for a day. Grant wants results, and soon. Ariel doesn't know if she can do this. Grant says that she can, because she doesn't want to be "the oldest living associate in the world." He asks who writes her review, and she says that he does. Grant says that he is her ticket to a partnership, and that she shouldn't forget that. He adds that nobody is as clean as Jack Turner appears to be, and then says that he'll see her later at her place. Ariel walks out, beaten, and cries out in the hallway. Yeah, sleeping with Grant is such a tragedy. Also, just quit your job already. She's single and presumably has a law degree. I'm sure she could find something somewhere else to pay the bills.
It's raining. That means there must be a funeral somewhere! And in fact, Jack is giving Barrington's eulogy. Jack talks about how Barrington would always choose one student who was "on his way to a flameout" as a pet project, and how, one semester, he chose Jack. Grant glares from the crowd. Jack says that Barrington taught him to love the law and justice and all that jazz. The music swells majestically as Jack says, "Dan Barrington changed my life. But more importantly, he taught me to try to use mine to change others."
Outside the church, Ariel waits for Jack. She offers her condolences and then starts to tell him something else, but Christianson interrupts them. Ariel leaves. Christianson compliments Jack's speech and says that Barrington will be deeply missed. Jack says that Barrington would have wanted the clinic to stay open. Christianson says they both know how Jack can make that happen. The two men step aside, out of the rain. Rob Lowe has one piece of hair sticking out in the back, and it's really bugging me. Christianson asks Jack what he's afraid of. Jack looks surprised and says, "Nothing?" Christianson says "Absolute power corrupts absolutely," but he says it in Latin, like seriously, what is with all of the Latin in this show? We get it. They're lawyers. I know lawyers, and none of them go around spouting off Latin all of the time. I mean, I design websites, but I don't go around yelling in HTML. It's annoying. Christianson says that "the strongest learn how to control, even wield power for the common good." Christianson excuses himself to speak to Barrington's wife. Riley rolls up and asks Jack if he's okay. Did these two make up and I just missed it? Jack and Riley both watch as Mrs. Barrington walks to her car. Jack says that the Barringtons were supposed to go on a cruise month. Riley thinks it's sad. Jack asks whether booking a cruise seems like the action of a guy about to kill himself. Riley doesn't know why anyone would do that anyway, and leaves. ["Which can't he understand -- killing yourself, or taking a cruise? Because I'm with him either way." -- Wing Chun] Christianson tries to talk to Mrs. Barrington, but she totally disses him. Jack sees the whole thing.
Riley calls the lab to find out the DNA test results. Yeah, remember his whole rape/murder trial? I'm thinking this episode has about three subplots too many. From Riley's conversation, you can tell that the DNA was a match for Sam. Riley is distracted by the sound of a football game on a television in a bar he's walking past. He stops and says into his phone, "There is one exception, isn't there?" I turn to my husband and say (as I'm sure many of you at home did), "Identical twins." My husband, who was totally not paying attention, was not impressed by my reasoning skills.
Riley goes to see Larry, claiming he has some documents for Larry to look over. Riley pretends to make small talk about football and basically traps Larry into saying some things about last week's football game (which Larry claimed to have watched with Sam) that aren't true. Riley says that the DNA was a perfect match for both Larry and Sam, since they're identical twins and all, but he figures Larry already knew that. Larry says he always said that Sam was innocent. Riley says Larry never mentioned that he was guilty, and that he set up his own brother. Larry is sick of taking care of his brother, as he's been doing for the past twenty years, knowing it will never end. Riley asks why the victim deserved to die. Larry doesn't have an answer for that. Riley advises him to turn himself in. Larry says that Riley has no proof, so Riley opens his coat to reveal that he's wearing a wire. Ooh, sneaky. Would that be admissible? Isn't that like entrapment or something? Larry takes off running, but the cops are already there with guns drawn.
Kathy and Jack walk through the halls in the clinic. Kathy says that Jack's clients have been waiting for an hour. Jack stops and talks to Nwamaka. Remember her? That character we haven't seen since, like, the second act? Another sign of too many subplots. Anyway, Jack congratulates her on the good news about the case. Nwamaka informs him that Chinyere has decided to go back to Nigeria. Jack does a triple take. Well, he doesn't, but he should have. Instead, he walks into his office and tells Chinyere he doesn't understand, because now she can bring her whole family over and they will all be protected. Chinyere says that now she can go back and fight for the women of her country. Jack says she can't fight for anyone if she's dead. Chinyere asks whether he believes in destiny. Wouldn't it be funny if Jack was just like, "No, and also, you're crazy." Jack says he supposes he does. Chinyere gives Jack some Magical Negro business about sacrificing your own comfort for the greater good. Because all characters only exist to either make Jack look better, or to make him realize that he has to do the right thing. Jack asks about her daughter, and Nwamaka says she's taking care of her. The music swells yet again.
Fineman is working late. Ariel stumbles in and sits on his desk. He asks if she's okay. She totally falls off his desk and lands hard on the floor. He goes to help her up, and she pulls him down and kisses him. His response: "Wow. You're drunk." Triple L really employs the sharpest minds in the business, eh? Also, has there ever been a television character who was in recovery for substance addiction who hasn't fallen off the wagon? I mean, I know it happens in real life, but some people really do stay sober. Anyway. Ariel admits that she is drunk, and kisses Fineman again, saying that she thought he wanted this. Fineman says that this is "the Stephen King version of [his] fantasy." He asks what happened. Ariel says it was nothing, and then advises Fineman to leave Triple L while he can, before they grab his soul. It's Wolfram and Hart! Also, Ariel's skirt is riding dangerously high. I think I just saw her ass cheek. Fineman says you have to believe you have a soul in order to lose it, and that he's an atheist. Arial is totally passed out, so she doesn't care.
Jack goes to Christianson's office to give a speech. Like, couldn't Jack just walk in and say he'd take the job? He sure does love to give speeches. Anyway, Jack lets us know that he's worried about corrupting power, and that his mentor is gone, and that he wants Christianson's assurance that the clinic will stay open. Christianson agrees, and Jack accepts the job. Finally! God. Christianson says that Jack will make Barrington proud, and Jack says he plans to. They slowly shake hands. If I were writing the show, now Jack would walk out of the office, and everyone would be standing around, and then someone would start the slow clap, and then everyone would join in and cheer and hoist Jack up on their shoulders. And then they would take him outside and there would be a ticker tape parade in Jack's honor. And then the final shot would be Jack, up in the air, cheering, as the confetti fell all around. That would be awesome.
Grant is pissed. Pissed! But I'm happy. Happy! Because finally we learn that Frances Fisher's character is named "Brit." Anyway, Grant is ranting and raving about Jack getting the job and Brit just walks right up and slaps Grant across the face! Awesome! They totally are my favorite characters. I haven't seen a bitchslap like that since Dynasty went off the air. Someone knocks at the office door. It's Charlie the Hayseed. Brit lets him in and says that Charlie will be helping them out on "that special project." Grant pretends he knows what in the hell Brit is talking about. Brit says that she told Charlie about Grant's client, Consolidated Records, and how it's always looking for new talent. Grant catches his snap and says that it's dying for it. Charlie totally falls for it.
Christianson talks to The Senator on the phone. Christianson says it's just as The Senator predicted. The Senator says that Jack is nothing if not predictable, and asks what Jack knows. Christianson thinks Jack knows nothing. The Senator says that they shouldn't bet on it, and that he wants to be kept posted, and they hang up. The Senator tells his secretary to send a bottle of champagne to Jack, congratulating him on his promotion. So, wait. You mean, basically everyone who works at Triple L is secretly evil, or soulless, or an atheist, or a drunk? And everyone who works at the clinic is pure and true? That's so...boring.
Jack walks down the street. He meets up with Detective Traub, who is happy that someone is finally talking to him. Jack asks if there is any possibility that Barrington was murdered. No, detectives normally spend days and days probing suicides. Duh! Traub says that he was about to ask Jack the same question. Was that supposed to be shocking? Because it totally wasn't.
week: I finally get my slow clap! Jack is still meeting with Traub. Ariel is still working for Grant. Jack takes on a teen killer, and someone shoots a gun at the courthouse. I hope they cut down on the number of subplots week. At least I'll already know the character names time.