Back when I first heard about this show, everyone made it sound as though it was going to be a fictionalization of the childhood of Jack and Bobby Kennedy, and I thought it sounded incredibly tacky. But after watching the first few episodes, I realize I was completely wrong. I mean, come on -- a president who always needs to be bailed out, strives for mediocrity, has an overbearing mother, and freezes up in debates? This is clearly a fictionalization of the childhood of George Bush.
Previously on Jack & Bobby, Dee Vine made out with Jack, and Coltney clomped off like a skittish filly when she saw Jack and Dee emerge all disheveled from the bathroom. Meanwhile, Grace fired her plagiarizing T.A., and Marcus harassed Jack for not spending enough time with the team.
Open on a busy diner, where Marcus is wearing an apron and working as a waiter. The theme of the episode gets an early introduction, as Marcus excuses his lateness by telling his father that he got tied up at church. Marcus delivers an order to Grace and Bobby, as Grace explains to Bobby that the church in the movie they just saw symbolized darkness and death. After she pontificates for a bit, she asks Bobby what he thought of the film. Bobby: "Um, it was long, and the church part seemed very depressing." Grace labels this observation "astute," and suggests that the Film Society should hire Bobby as a critic. I think the Film Society should hire Grace as a patron. Because she's so patronizing. Bobby asks Grace, "If religion is so creepy, why does everyone have it?" She seems a bit unnerved by the question, telling him that she doesn't think that everyone has it, and that those who do are weak-minded sheep. (That's a paraphrase.) He tells her that his friend Warren has to memorize a long passage in Hebrew for his upcoming bar mitzvah, and Graces interrupts to ask, "Wait, what are you doing hanging out with Warren? I thought you recognized the limitations of that friendship." Somehow, I suspect that Grace recognized the limitations of that friendship and convinced Bobby to dump the poor sap. Bobby makes a genuinely astute remark when he tells Grace that he really doesn't have that many friends to pick from.
Just then, Jack and Dee Vine walk into the diner. Grace sees them, and says "[Dee]? Oh my God, what is he doing with that intellectual vacuum?" You can make your own sucking jokes. Because that would be beneath me. Bobby tries to pass them off as friends, but his deception becomes more difficult when a small kiss (which Bobby describes as "symbolic") turns into some major making out in the middle of the diner.
Grace was clearly not fooled by Bobby's attempt at discretion, because we're now back at the McCallister house, where she is giving Jack crap for dating Dee: "Have you forgotten the soul-numbing angst, the all-around horror that constituted your original dalliance with this girl?" Jack and I jinx each other when we each say, "'Dalliance'?" Grace keeps up the overeducated trash talk when she adds, "Not to mention her inherent qualities. We haven't even delved into that puddle. Don't you want someone of similar integrity, similar intellect?" Wait, do we really say that someone has integrity when he lies about his brother's marijuana, forges notes from his mother, and throws a massive party (complete with underage drinking) the moment he has the house to himself? Maybe Grace is concerned about Jack dating someone with more integrity than he has. In all her complaining, Grace does make me laugh when she says that Dee "looks like the life-sized version of a toy one might find in a Happy Meal." 'Cause Dee Vine is pretty and all, but that is a mighty big head she's carrying around. And the theme is hammered home yet again (all before the credits) when we learn that Dee's father is a minister. Presumably a religious minister and not, you know, the Minister of Finance of a small European nation. As upset as Grace is that Jack is dating Dee, she's even more upset when she hears that Jack went to Dee's church that morning. And Jack is clearly enjoying how much it gets under Grace's skin.
We get our first interview from the World of Tomorrow, as Future Marcus tells us that in the country's history, presidents have had many careers before becoming politicians, including "two former Hollywood actors." The forums immediately go crazy with speculation, and Arnold Schwarzenegger and Ben Affleck try to schedule a double date with James Carville and Mary Matalin. Future Marcus tells us that of all the careers held by presidents, only two were ever ministers before taking office. One was James Garfield and the other was...can you guess? Can you? If you can't, you're banned. Oh, okay, for the slow people in the audience, the second one was "the reverend Bobby McCallister." Gah, as if Future Bobby wasn't perfect enough.
Finally, we come to the credits. And some commercials. Did you know that if you join the Army, all you'll be doing is delivering food to homeless people? No, really, that's what my TV tells me.
"Also starring Bradley Cooper." Woohoo! More pretty for my screen. His name is pretty, too. I think I'll just call him Bradley Cooper. Grace is walking across the quad (or the triangle, or the octagon, or whatever) with the aforementioned pretty. He starts to say something to Grace, but she (naturally) interrupts him to hand him some documents. He thanks her for the opportunity to be abused as her T.A. (again, I'm paraphrasing), and she immediately starts the abuse by criticizing his choice of words. He tells her that he doesn't expect any special treatment, and she thinks that he's implying that he's heard that she's a pushover when it comes to T.A.s (you know, letting them get away with plagiarism and all). It's clear that he actually meant something else when he brought up special treatment, but he clams up when she asks him about it. She tells him to bone up on his feminist reading before the class, and when he tells her he's already read the book she suggests, she starts quizzing him right there: "What are the chief qualitative differences between the first and second wave of feminism?" Um, the first wave wore bloomers and the second wave wore mini-skirts? (That's a joke, by the way. Save your righteous emails for somebody else. ["Plus I bet Elizabeth Cady Stanton went commando from time to time." -- Wing Chun]) Bradley Cooper aces the quiz, and Grace rudely tells him to shut up.
Jack, Coltney, and Marcus walk out of a classroom as Jack asks if "anybody's up for a last ditch Chem cram tonight? I've got the caffeine pills and the jerky." Heh. "Cram." "Jerky." Heh heh. Coltney's out because she has to babysit, and Marcus has to work at the diner. Jack tells him to blow it off, pointing out that Marcus isn't even getting paid, but Marcus would rather fulfill his family obligations than sit around eating chaw sticks with Jack. Jack starts talking about the track meet coming up that weekend, and Marcus is rather noncommittal before walking away. Coltney's been nearby for this conversation, and after Marcus leaves, she comes and sticks her horsey nose in his business, telling Jack that "he seems kind of out of it." Jack blames it on nerves about the track meet, pointing out that it's the biggest meet of the season and that if the team loses, they won't make it to regionals. Just then, Dee Vine walks up and possessively grabs hold of Jack, asking the two of them if they want to walk her class. "Yeah," says Coltney, "wouldn't want to get lost." And then what does Coltney do? Of course, she stomps away.
Bobby and his little blond friend Warren are walking into the synagogue. They exposit that they are going to meet the rabbi, who told Warren to find someone to help him learn his portion of the Torah. As they walk in, it becomes clear that Warren has told the rabbi that Bobby would be coming to meet him, but not that Bobby is not Jewish.
Bobby and Warren are sitting in the rabbi's office, where the rabbi quickly learns that Bobby is a secular humanist (although Bobby pronounces the phrase as though he's sounding out difficult foreign words). Despite the fact that they are in Hart, Missouri, the rabbi has a Yiddish accent like you wouldn't believe. He's also greatly overplaying his role, waving his hands around and pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. Will I go to hell if I call a rabbi a ham? After dressing down Warren (not like that, you perverts -- he's a rabbi, not a priest), the rabbi agrees to let Bobby help Warren prepare for his bar mitzvah, telling the two of them to return tomorrow.
Future Marcus tells us that he doesn't know exactly what set Bobby down a religious path. He's certain, however, that whatever it was did not come from Grace.
Grace is lecturing in a large classroom filled with students. Oh, I almost forgot something:
Dear Jessica,
Thank you for the four-line rule.
Love,
LTG
Where was I? Oh yes, Grace is pontificating to her class. She lists a long string of bad things caused by religious extremism, and asks them to consider the question, "Would we be better off if [religion] had simply never existed? Okay, we're going to talk more about this time." Hmm, I think that "we" should read "I," and that "talk" should read "harangue." As the students all get up to leave, a young woman in a head scarf approaches Grace. The student starts by telling Grace how much she enjoyed the lecture, and then suggests to Grace that perhaps the presentation was a bit one-sided. Grace takes affront at the notion that she has any kind of bias in her teaching, but tells the student (whose name may have been Hebba or Heppa or Hibba -- I'll stick with Hebba, I think) that she has raised an interesting point, and that Grace will address it in the class. Through this entire discussion, Bradley Cooper looks on with interest. After Hebba leaves, he tells Grace that he's impressed by her flexibility. She demonstrates more of that flexibility by suggesting that anyone who believes in God is crazy.
Commercials. Does anyone really need to hear Clay Aiken sing a song that wasn't good enough to be included in the original release of Aladdin? (That one's not a joke, but still, save your emails.)
High-school classroom. Jack's Chemistry teacher is handing back the mid-terms, reminding everyone that it makes up forty percent of their grade. Shouldn't a mid-term be happening, I don't know, in the middle of the year? Coltney is proud of her A-, while Jack shows off his C+. Jack tells Coltney that Marcus will have aced the test, but as the teacher hands it back to him, we can see that he got a D-, and she tells him he needs to have his parents sign it. Pressed for an explanation by Jack, Marcus tells him that it was just one of those things. As the class is dismissed, Jack tells Coltney that he's worried about Marcus. She reminds Jack that he said earlier that Marcus was all right, and observes that Jack should maybe work on his "perceptiveness." "Yeah, thanks for the tip." And by "tip," Jack means "insult." (I'm just here to translate, folks.) This time it's Jack's turn to stomp off, as Coltney just stands there. In an empty classroom.
University lecture hall. Grace is telling the class that she wants to address a concern raised by a student, and then she identifies Hebba as that student. Grace basically blows off Hebba's concern, claiming (with the help of an ass-kissing ass kisser named, not improbably, "Bryce") that she is entitled to a presumption of objectivity because she's their teacher. Grace equates religion with fascism (yes, seriously), and then addresses Hebba directly as she tells her that because she's a student, she should be questioning all of her long-held beliefs. Grace basically tells her that until she opens her mind to the idea that her religion is false (if not outright evil), she will not be a worthwhile scholar. I have to say, Christine Lahti is generally a fine actress. But when she delivers these long lectures, she sounds like a high-school kid reading a speech at the Voice of Democracy competition. (And not the kid who came in first place. The kid who got an honorable mention.) She overenunciates certain words, and puts stress on the weirdest places. Hebba is understandably upset at being singled out, and she walks out of the classroom. Grace piles on even more, as she tells the rest of the class that "this is not a polemic, people, this is a dialectic. To participate, you gotta stay in the room." She would be a little more believable if we ever saw her engaging in dialogue with her students instead of just lecturing at them.
Something's wrong with my television -- there's a horrible squeal coming out of the speakers. Oh, wait, that's just Warren reciting his Torah portion, and doing a fine impersonation of Peter Brady when his voice broke. He and Bobby are in a room somewhere in the synagogue. I know because there's a menorah in the background. Very subtle. Warren just can't remember the Hebrew words, and Bobby quickly steps in and corrects his pronunciation. Warren correctly points out that Bobby is better at this than Warren is. And I have to say, if that's true after just one day, Bobby is either a genius or Warren is a moron. (I vote for the latter.) Warren and Bobby talk about the whole bar mitzvah thing, and how it means that Warren is a man, and that his father will no longer be responsible for his sins. (If any of the Jewish theology is wrong here, blame Warren.) Bobby leaves the room to find a vending machine.
As Bobby walks down the hall in the synagogue, he sees a boy, his father, and the rabbi walking ahead of him. The father stops and places a tallis (a traditional shawl) over the shoulders of his son. The rabbi talks to the boy about his upcoming bar mitzvah, and then about the value and importance of the Torah, which he then shows to the father and son. (I understand from folks on the forums that none of this particular ceremonial activity would actually be happening like this, but it's not like this show has impressed me with its realism in any other respect, so I can let it go.) Warren walks up behind Bobby and scares the crap out of him, as they continue to spy on this intimate father-son-rabbi moment.
Crowded high-school hallway. Dee Vine walks up to Jack, who is at his locker, and tells him that he is coming over for dinner tomorrow night: "Mom's making a loaf. Don't ask." Jack tries to beg off, but Dee sees though his transparent lies, and accuses him of disliking her father because he's a minister. She finally gets Jack to agree to come over by pointing out that both of her parents will be going out after dinner, leaving her and Jack alone in the house. Suddenly, we hear a deep voice say "McCallister." The voice came from a very tall, very muscular, very beautiful man. I'm feeling a bit faint. Jack walks over to him and says, "Coach, what's up?" Close-up on Coach's face. [Thud!] Oh, I'm sorry...I seem to have fallen off the coach. Er, I mean, couch. Is it hot in here? What show am I watching? Oh, it's that Jack fellow. Coach asks Jack if he'd like his spot back on the team. Jack is confused. Coach tells him that Marcus is failing Chemistry and has been placed on academic probation. Hey, nice breach of privacy. Apparently, it's not just the academic probation that's keeping Marcus off the team -- his father won't let him run either. And apparently the team has no other backup runners, because without Marcus or Jack, they will have to forfeit the meet that weekend. So they're going to let the kid whose brother brought marijuana to school for him just forget that pesky athletic suspension and rejoin the team? I think I'm going to need a crane to suspend my disbelief for this.
Grace's office. She asks Bradley Cooper once again why he said that she didn't need to give him special consideration. He stammers a bit, and then says, "Because I'm gay. And I'm going to be spending so much time with my new recapper boyfriend that I won't really be able to get any work done." Oh, sorry. That was just in my head. What he really says is, "Because I'm white. And male." Grace and I both wonder what the hell he's talking about, because it's clear that she would never give a break to a white male. He deftly changes the subject, asking if Grace wasn't a bit hard on Hebba. She explains that she was actually trying to help Hebba, because "female fundamentalists are often the ironic victims of their own fanatical beliefs. Come on: a woman in 2004, covering herself, in this country?"
Just then, there's a knock on the door. It's Todd, the president of the Campus Christ Coalition. He's there to explain how upset his group is at Grace's hostility to religion, and to let Grace know that until she apologizes to Hebba, they intend to protest by staging a walkout on her class. After he smarms out of the room, Grace tries to laugh it off. When asked by Bradley Cooper what she plans to do, she pulls a W. and says, "Aw, bring it on. They may be self-righteous, but I'm right." Fade to commercials.
The camera is hovering just over Grace's shoulder as she walks into the lecture hall. She starts talking, and then notices a crew with a large-sized video camera in the middle of the room, filming her. I don't get it. Is this a news crew, or the Campus Christ Coalition? She's definitely taken aback, and nervously starts her lecture. She's giving an overview of global events that took place in 1930 -- and I do mean global, hitting on the Nazis, Gandhi, and the Chinese Nationalists in one short sentence. What class is this, exactly? Last time, she was talking about religion, and now she's giving a history lecture. As she starts to speak, students start to get up and leave the room. It's hard to tell how many participate in the protest, but it looks like at least half a dozen. Grace is freaked out, but steams on with the lecture. Well, Grace, you complained that this generation wasn't protesting anything. Be careful what you wish for.
Warren is reciting for the rabbi and Bobby at the synagogue. He's doing a lousy job, and Bobby soon jumps in to correct him. The rabbi is impressed with Bobby's quick mastery of the material, and then leaves for an appointment. Bobby turns down Warren's offer of a ride home from his mother, claiming that he would rather walk. However, once he's away from Warren, he ducks into the room where the Torah is kept and slips a tallis over his shoulders. He opens the Torah cabinet and is about to touch the Torah when the rabbi finds him. "What are you doing in here?" Bobby: "I, uh, I missed my ride?" Well, now we know that freezing up in a crisis is a regular thing for Bobby. The rabbi angrily walks over and closes the Torah cabinet, pulling the tallis off of Bobby's shoulders: "This isn't for you to be playing with." Bobby explains about the father and son he saw before, and the rabbi tells him, "You shouldn't be eavesdropping on people." Bobby: "It was more like spying." Rabbi: "Well, you shouldn't be spying on people." Bobby goes on to ask the rabbi whether, if Bobby's father is Catholic, Bobby is Catholic as well. Why does he assume that his father was Catholic just because he was Mexican? Bobby wonders, if Warren's father is responsible for his sins until his bar mitzvah, who's responsible for Bobby? And why does Bobby keep talking about himself in the third person? Oh, wait, that's not him -- it's me. I got a little confused there for a second. The rabbi and Bobby sit down for a chat, the rabbi explaining to Bobby that he actually didn't have an appointment -- he just wanted to get away from Warren.
Future Marcus tells us that once Bobby was elected to the White House, every religious group in the country came asking for special favors. Bobby would meet with them, but would always turn them down, disgusted by people's efforts to use their religion to advance their political agenda.
Jack is at dinner at Dee Vine's house, kissing parental ass like it's going out of style. Oh crap. Dee's father is Ed Begley Jr. What the hell did I do to deserve this? Okay, soldiering on. As Jack tries to maintain polite conversation, Dee slips off her shoe and sticks her foot in his crotch. Jack is mildly freaked out, and tries to push her foot away. Rev. Ed congratulates Jack on being asked to rejoin the track team, but Jack is not so sure he wants the spot if it comes at the expense of Marcus. Rev. Ed commends Jack's loyalty, but tells him he also needs to look out for himself. Oh, I see -- he's going to be one of those ministers. I generally can't stand Begley, but he's just perfectly smarmy for this role. At the moment, he's offering himself up to Jack. As a counselor, you freaks. It comes out that Rev. Ed had an ulterior motive for inviting Jack to dinner -- one that Dee Vine never bothered to tell Jack about. She gets a wicked look in her eye when Jack learns this. I think Keri Lynn Pratt does a great job with this role. Rev. Ed invites Jack to join him in his study. Wait, maybe he is offering himself up to Jack.
In the study, Rev. Ed tells Jack that it's about time someone had a talk with him about the changes his body is going through. Well Ed, at your age it's just natural that your hair would start falling out and you would experience impotence. Oh wait, he's talking about Jack's body. I'm getting a bad feeling in my stomach. Rev. Ed tells Jack that he was once a teenager, and knows all about hormones. I don't believe I'm being forced to write about Ed Begley's hormones. Do I get hazard pay for this? Rev. Ed tells Jack that he is going to ask Jack to do something, and then he pulls his chair up so that he is practically straddling Jack. "Take my hands, Jack. Put your hands into my hands." Oh, scary. And then Rev. Ed asks Jack what he thinks about Jesus. Jack thinks that maybe he's "pro" and Rev. Ed. thinks "that Jesus is awesome." And then Rev. Ed tells Jack that Jesus wants Jack to avoid the natural urges that will endanger his immortal soul. And then Rev. Ed asks Jack if he would "pledge, on [his] immortal soul, that [he] wouldn't disrespect [his] body or [Dee Vine's] body." Jack, stutteringly, agrees. And that, blessedly, ends my involvement with one Ed Begley Jr. He's all yours now, Jessica. ["Not really; this is the last Jack & Bobby recap TWoP will be doing." -- Wing Chun]
The rabbi has called Grace in to talk about Bobby. She thinks the idea that Bobby is interested in religion is outrageous. The rabbi tells her that Bobby came to him in a state of spiritual crisis, and that he needs help. Do you think Grace is calm and mature when she responds to this? Do you think she asks the rabbi what makes him think that? If you do, you should go back to watching Desperate Housewives, because the fans of Jack & Bobby knew from the instant this scene started that she would start yelling hysterically. The camera pans out to show Bobby listening outside the rabbi's office.
Grace and Bobby are walking to the car, and Grace is (naturally) haranguing Bobby about the fact that she got called into the rabbi's office. (I wonder if they'll find a different office for Grace to get called into each week -- the principal's office, the teacher's office, the rabbi's office. Maybe week she'll get called into the grocer's office after Bobby asks about the difference between regular artichokes and Jerusalem artichokes.) She gets in the car, but Bobby refuses. Grace gets back out of the car, and in response to Bobby's question about why she yelled at the rabbi, says "I didn't yell at the rabbi. And I just explained to you why I yelled at the rabbi." Heh. Bobby starts to yell at her about always putting down religion, asking her why she has to hate everything and why he, of all the children in the world (again, a paraphrase) had to be denied the opportunity to do normal things like go to church. She's fairly defensive, and then blows up, pointing out that she was trying to spare him from the endless guilt and judgment that she was subjected to as a child. And then she does the typical Grace thing, saying "I am not having this conversation with you, this of all weeks." Isn't that one of the four questions? "Why is this week, of all weeks, special?" Somehow, I think that's not quite right. Anyway, this is the thing about Grace -- she lectures, she tells people what to do, she states her beliefs as though they are absolute facts. But as soon as someone -- least of all her children -- challenges her or questions her, she just withdraws from the conversation. As Grace starts to get back in the car, Bobby says, "He'd take me." Grace: "Who?" Bobby: "You know who." Grace: "Watch it, Bobby." Bobby: "He would have taken me to church." Grace: "He wouldn't have taken you anywhere. You know very little about your father, and I guarantee you that's all you want to know." Wait, was he a busboy or a serial killer? I know they're going to tease this out over several episodes, if not the entire season, but there had better be some actual payoff to Grace's dislike of the boys' father. When Bobby says that he wants to be Catholic like his father, Grace responds "over my dead body." After a little more shouting back and forth, in which Grace tells Bobby that his father just went out for milk one day and never came back, Bobby tells Grace, "You act like you know everything, but you don't." And that may be the truest thing he's said so far. Grace asks him to get back in the car, and tells him that they can discuss this some more later. As Bobby gets in the car, he says, "Sometimes I hate you." Just sometimes?
Commercials. Hmmm, Hilary Duff in a movie about the difficulties of life at a music school. Do you think she'll triumph in the end? No, really, I want to know -- I can't take the suspense.
Jack enters the diner and sits at the counter, where he asks Marcus for some pie. Marcus asks him if he didn't just eat, and Jack says, "Two words. Fig sorbet." Okay, I like fancy food and all, but that sounds nasty. Marcus laughs and gets him the pie. Jack tells Marcus about the virginity oath. Marcus: "That's messed up, man." Jack: "You know what else is messed up? Intentionally failing a huge test because you know it will get you kicked off the track team." Marcus denies knowing anything about that, but Jack is not thrown off the trail. Jack insists on knowing why Marcus did it, and Marcus tells him "You're back on the team, which is what you wanted anyway. It doesn't matter why." Jack insists that it matters to him, pointing out that Marcus loves track. And this is where every HoYay-loving person in the audience fed Marcus his line: "But not as much as I love you." Unfortunately, we don't write for the show, so that didn't really happen. Jack insists on knowing why Marcus did it, and Marcus reluctantly tells him that ever since his sister went to college, his father has had less help in the diner and a huge tuition bill to pay. Marcus wanted to get kicked off the team to help his dad because he was tired of seeing him work double shifts and still have more work to do on top of that, and he knew his father would never voluntarily ask him to quit the team. Jack is so pretty.
Grace's office. Bradley Cooper comes in with some research she wanted. Grace tells him that she really underestimated his feminist values, because she has "two children who took [her] last name instead of their father's." Did you really give them a choice, Grace? It seems that Grace has discovered that Bradley Cooper (whose character is named Tom, but I won't call him that) has been using his mother's surname instead of his father's. Apparently, his father is a major bigwig who has given millions to the university. She says that Bradley Cooper's "hiring was pushed through by President Benedict himself because, my God, [Bradley Cooper's] a one-man endowment." Hey, where's the money-grubbing whore been all episode? Bradley Cooper tells him that this is the reason he doesn't use his father's name -- he doesn't want special favors, and he doesn't want people like Grace abusing him just because he comes from a privileged background: "I worked my ass off to get here." I'm not sure about that -- turn around so we can verify that statement. But Bradley Cooper is apparently something of a wuss, because he tells Grace that he understands if she wants to fire him, and that he'll clean out his desk. Just then, Hebba comes into the office. Grace calls out to Bradley Cooper as he's leaving, telling him that she needs some papers graded, and that she'll see him tomorrow. Let's count that as Half-Assed Apology #1.
Hebba has come to speak to Grace. She wants to tell Grace that she has nothing to do with the protesting groups, some of whom keep trying to convert her: "I just think it's not even really about me anymore." Grace: "I'm not sure it ever was." And then Hebba gives a kick-ass speech. And because she's so cool, the four-line rule definitely doesn't apply to her. "The one thing is, I still think you were unfair to me that day. You judged me superficially. You look at me and you see an oppressed Muslim woman forced to cover her head by a misogynistic and backwards culture." Grace: "I never said that." Hebba: "That's what you meant. You see me as a victim. I don't think you see my choice in all of this. You know, in my hall, there are two women who are anorexic, one who has breast implants, two others who are considering surgery either to their body or their face. All of them obsess over their weight or their clothes and their looks. This is what your culture does to women. It suggests ideals they'll never attain and, when they fail to attain them, tells them they're worthless. You talk about my conditioning, but what you don't understand is that I'm a feminist just like you. And this [gesturing to her head scarf] is a part of that. This is me saying 'no' to all the ways that your culture tries to exploit me. This is me saying 'yes' to my religion and my God. Not no to being liberated. I am liberated. Well, anyway, I'll see you in class." And here it comes. Grace: "Hebba. I'm sorry." Woohoo! The first whole-assed apology from Grace. Let's have a party, y'all, because I doubt this day will come again any time soon. Hebba thanks Grace for the apology, and then leaves Grace to meditate on her own foolishness.
Marcus comes into the diner, and finds Jack working with Marcus's dad. Long story short, Saint Jack took even more weight on his shoulders and convinced Marcus's father to let Jack take his place in the diner -- for free -- so that Marcus could continue to run track. I hope the Department of Labor doesn't audit your business anytime soon, Mr. Marcus -- that would be one hefty fine for violating the minimum-wage laws.
Future Marcus tells us that President Bobby will be remembered as the president who took a stand against religious interests, but that Marcus will remember him as the man who stayed with him and prayed for hours as Marcus's father died: "Because in the end, that's all Bobby really was. Just like Jack. A man of faith."
Jack and Bobby are in their room. Bobby is putting on a tie. Jack tells Bobby he can't believe he pulled it off: "You actually have a backbone." Bobby: "I always had a backbone." It was just really small, and he kept it in his pocket. Grace enters the room in a gray sweater and skirt, with a vaguely ethnic-looking scarf around her neck. Jack leaves, and Bobby asks Grace if she's mad that they're missing the Film Society. "Are you kidding? Do you think I'd let Jules and Jim pass you by? I rented it. We're watching it later." ["Yeah, that's an appropriate movie for a ninth-grader to watch." -- Wing Chun] She notes that the Film Society was one Sunday morning tradition, and now they'll have a new one: "For a while. Hopefully not too long." They talk a bit about the fight they had, and Grace delivers Half-Assed Apology #2 when she tells him that things with his father were more complicated than she let on. She also wants to impress upon Bobby that while she is not a traditionally religious person, she does have faith. In response to his question about what that faith is, she says, "I have faith in humanity." Bobby: "That's not the same." Grace: "It is, actually. It's a really strong faith. It's faith in people and their potential. That we're all fallible, but also forgiven. That our own fragility can be the source of our greatest strengths, if we can learn. That the differences that separate us are dwarfed by the similarities that connect us. And I have faith in you. And I actually believe that faith itself can move mountains. I know it's not a church-going kind of faith. But I tell you what, it's what gets me up every single morning and it's what gets me through every single day." Through this entire speech, Grace is cleaning Bobby's suit with a lint brush. What a mom. (And I know I just violated the four-line rule, but I think it was worth it.) Bobby allows as maybe he understands what she's talking about, and they share a smile. And then we're back to the old Grace, as she tells him that this is just an exploratory mission, and that if he's going to investigate religion, she's going to bring him to every kind of denomination he can imagine, including Sufism and Hinduism. She's a bit more resistant when he suggests a Catholic church.
Grace and Bobby enter a predominantly African-American church, in which the choir is already going full-blast on an upbeat hymn. ["Because the only churches in pop culture that are life-affirming and fun to attend are Baptist churches. Make a note." -- Wing Chun] Montage of Marcus running (on a Sunday morning?) and Jack working at the diner. Is two shots a montage? In any case, that's what they show us.
Future Marcus tells us, while we still hear the hymn playing, that when he was criticized by religious groups, President Bobby would say, "They didn't elect me Reverend of the United States." What a wit. Future Marcus tells us that Bobby also converted the White House bowling alley into a non-denominational chapel and preached a mean sermon there every Sunday morning. Oh sure, the religious folks get a chapel. But what about the bowlers? What about the bowlers?
Cut to a final shot of Bobby and Grace clapping and swaying along to the hymn. They completely lack rhythm, but Bobby sure does look happy. And for once, so does Grace.
You know, if we don't eventually get to see Warren's bar mitzvah, I will feel incredibly cheated.