House TV Show - Flakes On A Plane - House Photos & Videos, House Reviews & House Recaps | TWoP

Aired 04-09-2007

An older woman who thinks it's time to let loose and party hires a hooker and promptly collapses. Fortunately, she hired a Hooker With A Heart Of Gold, who takes her to PPTH and stays with her, eventually scoring a date with Wilson. In the end, Chase makes the correct diagnosis (poison from the fumigation door via a pipe that connects the two houses), and saves the woman in the nick of time. He's feeling so triumphant, he pushes his luck with Cameron and tells her that he wants "more" from their relationship. She coldly tells him that she doesn't, and it's over. Ouch. But who cares about that when we've got House and Cuddy trapped on a flight full of sick people from Singapore? When a patient in First Class shows symptoms of meningitis, House stupidly has Cuddy take care of it. She diagnoses it as meningitis, and everyone in earshot suddenly has meningitis symptoms, too. Then Cuddy gets sick, and House does an LP on the original sick guy to confirm the meningitis...except it's not meningitis. House figures out that while the first guy really is sick, the other passengers on the plane are a bunch of a whiny hypochondriac babies who convinced themselves that they were sick too, even giving themselves worry rashes. So they're fine, but they still have to figure out what's wrong with the first guy. With the help of some makeshift Cottages -- a child, a guy who doesn't speak English, and a woman who rocks a sweater vest and attitude better than Cameron ever did -- House diagnoses the guy as having swallowed a leaky condom full of cocaine. Just as he's about to slice the guy open and take it out, he realizes that the guy just has the bends. And that's why you don't SCUBA dive before a flight.

We begin in the home of an older woman who loves cats. We know this because there are cat figurines all over her shelves and cat pictures on the walls. The woman, whom we will know as Fran, answers the door and lets a professionally dressed woman named Robin inside. Robin compliments Fran's house, and Fran seems nervous. Robin hands over a list of her mysterious agency's "full range of services" in a strange, mannered, fake saleswoman-y way. Fran orders the "Round The World" deluxe package, which costs one thousand dollars. At this point, I'm figuring Robin is a travel agent who makes house calls. Robin says that satisfaction is guaranteed "twice," which is always great for an exotic trip, and Fran heads to her bedroom to get the money. She grabs a wad of hundred dollar bills out of her dresser (I guess Robin is one of those travel agents who doesn't take credit cards?) and tells her cat to get off her dresser and out of the bedroom.

Robin suddenly enters, wearing a smile and not a whole lot more. I'm starting to think she isn't a travel agent after all. Then again, my hometown used to have this travel agency that closed, and then the building was bought and used by a secret swingers' club. So maybe there's something like that going on. Either way, this is an unexpected development. Fran is so shocked that her vision gets blurry. Or maybe it's not shock so much as it is shame for wearing a freaking cardigan and a turtleneck to an appointment with a prostitute. I mean, I know this is her first time and all, but even though I've never ordered a prostitute, I know that if I did, I wouldn't wear clothes for a Sunday morning knitting circle when I met her. Fran promptly passes out, her money fluttering to the floor after her. Robin's fake smile disappears. "Oh, God," she says, so put out by her customer's gross display of dying on her. She actually does kneel down and try to shake Fran awake until she sees the pile of money on the floor. She grabs it and stuffs it into her scrap of a dress under the watchful eyes of Harrington the Cat, who probably hates Fran and doesn't care that she's dying and being robbed, because cats hate all people. But something about Harrington the Cat makes Robin grab the phone and call 911. I guess if you're going to hire a hooker, it's good to hire one with a Heart Of Gold.

When we return, I'm sad to see that we're still with Fran and Robin. I must admit, I have been waiting and waiting for the fun plane hijinks to begin ever since I heard about this episode. House and Cuddy trapped on a plane full of sick people? Surely, this will be the greatest episode in House history, and possibly in the history of all of television (with the exception, of course, of that episode of Dallas where Sue Ellen got totally drunk and fell down the stairs, and Lucy saw it all but was high on pills, so she just stood there and laughed at Sue Ellen instead of calling an ambulance). But instead, we have to spend time with Wilson, who's given the job of taking care of Fran, since I guess fainting is cancer now. Also because with House and Cuddy gone, he's the only doctor left at PPTH except for those surgeons we only see when House is interrupting them and making them really angry. Robin is still at Fran's side, which is really nice of her, even if she did take Fran's money. Robin has also changed back into her professional business attire alter ego. She's like a superhero with those quick changes! Wilson's amazing doctor skills uncover a motion-sickness patch on Fran's neck, left over from a trip from which she just returned. Could this trip have included a plane ride with House and Cuddy? Is there a flashback on the way? No: Wilson just says that those patches can cause dizziness. The dizziness made Fran fall, and then she hit her head on the floor, which caused her to black out.

By Sara M

On that assumption, Wilson pronounces the case closed and leads the women out. He tells Robin that someone should watch over Fran for the two hours. Both Fran and Robin stutter excuses for why this can't happen, but Robin's Heart Of Gold shows up again, and she asks Wilson if it's important for someone to stay with Fran. "We just don't like people to be alone after they leave here," Wilson says, forgetting to add that this is because they usually can't take three steps out of PPTH without going all stiff or crashing through a window in the lobby or having bloody poop they don't want to tell anyone about. Or collapsing on the ground with a seizure, as Fran is now doing. Wilson attempts to treat her for all of two seconds before calling for help, says he has no idea what's going on, and then yells for House, the only person at PPTH who's capable of doing anything.

But House can't answer Wilson's cries, because he's boarding a plane! Hooray! At long last! I am rubbing my hands in delight and anticipation. So far, I am not disappointed. While some random guy pushes a wheelchair-bound House through the airport-plane-connector-tunnel thing, House complains to Cuddy that they took his "antique vintner's cane" away at the gate, citing the hidden corkscrew as a security risk. House will have to wait until the plane lands back in the United States to get his cane back and play James Bond with its hidden gadgets. This displeases him, but considering how often House uses that cane as a weapon and the fact that he was recently on the No Fly List, I think the airport made the right decision. Suddenly, House turns to a woman holding a fussing child and orders her to give it some sleep-inducing Benadryl before House kills it. Oh, House! He says what everyone single person on every plane with a small child on board wishes he could. Cuddy mutters something about House bringing goodwill to another continent, even though the blonde white woman House just yelled at is probably not a citizen of Singapore. This does give Cuddy a way to exposit what she and House are doing in Singapore while the entire population of PPTH dies without House there to save them: House gave a speech at some WHO conference. I don't know why Cuddy had to go with him, especially since she was helpless to make him give a speech longer than three minutes ("it may have been short, but it had girth") or control his hotel room expenditures. She mentions his "spiteful" room service order ("I was hungry!"); his three-hundred-dollar bottle of wine, no doubt taken from one of those minifridges in which a candy bar costs fifty dollars ("I was thirsty!"); and one hundred and twenty dollars for "video services" ("I was lonely!"). House reassures Cuddy that he'll take care of the extra five hundred dollars he spent.

And so he does, as Cuddy finds out when she goes to sit in her first-class seat and finds that her ticket has been changed to economy class, thereby recouping the five hundred dollars that House spent at the hotel. Ha! That's what you get for yelling at someone for unnecessary hotel room expenses while you spend three times as much for first-class tickets! Cuddy sighs resignedly and can't believe she didn't think of that first as she makes her way to the back of the plane with the cattle and chickens.

But now we're back with Fran and Robin, and though their odd relationship is interesting and would certainly be all I would want from any other episode, in this case, all I want is more House and Cuddy! Fran lies to Wilson that her recent trip was to Duluth to visit her sister, prompting Wilson to ask if the fresh tattoo on Fran's ankle was part of that visit. I know it's cold up there, Wilson, but I'm pretty sure they have tattoo parlors in Duluth. Robin looks up from her cell phone to check the tattoo out. It's an upside-down heart with wings. A banner across it reads, according to Robin's able Spanish translating abilities, "Fire Butt," although I think a better translation would be "Ass Of Fire." Either way, it's the best tattoo ever, even if it isn't actually on Fran's ass. "I was a little drunk," Fran explains sheepishly. Wilson asks where the drinking happened, and Fran explains that she turned fifty-eight last month, which was how old her mother was when she died. Fran got all freaked out, packed a bag, drove to JFK airport, and bought a seat on the first flight to a warm place she could find. That flight was to Caracas, Venezuela. Oddly, Fran's spontaneous devil-may-care attitude didn't extend to concerns about motion sickness, as she bought all those patches. "Oh my God," Robin mutters, just a little bit admiringly. Not only that, but Fran threw all caution to the wind and ate all the raw foods and drank all the water she could find. She also drank lots of booze and snorted cocaine off a homosexual man's stomach. Wilson takes a second to add this up in his mind, then asks if Fran had sex. Fran says she did, with someone named "El Gordo." "He was a large man," she says, smiling. Robin is enjoying this. Fran says that she never does things like that, and she's sure that's why she's sick.

Back on the plane! House is enjoying his first-class accommodations, which come with plenty of free booze, a rib eye steak, and a smiling flight attendant to bring both. Not having as great a time is the gentleman across the row, who groans his way through a Bloody Mary. The flight attendant asks if he's okay, and House answers for him that he's just drunk. Then the man throws up all over his food. Watching this a day after recovering from food poisoning brought back some really fond memories, I'll tell you. Assorted first-class passengers are most appalled at the man's display and mutter disapprovingly. The flight attendant tries to communicate with the man, who apparently speaks Korean. She asks if anyone on the plane speaks Korean. No one does. She asks if anyone on the plane is a doctor. House looks around. When no volunteers are forthcoming, he gets to his feet... and goes to fetch a doctor. He brings his meal and wine with him. I don't blame him at all -- I wouldn't want to spend my sweet first-class flight helping some guy recover from too much alcohol.

Cuddy's in economy, having the worst time of her life. She flips through what appears to be a duty-free magazine while some gross man to her snores in her ear and totally pretends to be asleep so he can brush his arm against her chest. House limps over with his food and drink, and Cuddy assumes that he's there to gloat. But no, he says, he's switching seats with her, because he's way too nice to stick her in economy for eighteen hours. She's so grateful that she doesn't realize that House isn't way too nice to stick her in economy for eighteen hours.

Somehow, Wilson has become the leader of the Cottages. They're tackling Fran's case. Chase thinks they should put the motion sickness patch back on Fran, as its presence was obviously making her feel better. Foreman disagrees, saying that it's not a fix, so it's irrelevant. When Cameron agrees with Chase, Foreman stops short and accuses them of agreeing with each other because they're sleeping together. Oh, he's so jealous it's not even funny. With Chase and Cameron's backing, Wilson says he'll put Fran back on the patch, which violates House Treatment Method Rule #1: never make the patient better. Always make the patient feel as bad as possible. The Cottages try to decide the course of action amongst themselves, with Foreman sniping at the other two because he isn't getting any and they are. Wilson finally steps in and shuts them up by ordering them off to run blood tests, do a CT scan, and check Fran's house for toxins. He then breaks House Rule #2 and says "please." With Wilson at the helm, Fran's a goner.

Cuddy comes marching back to economy class and rips the earphones off House's ears to yell at him for sending her to first class under false pretenses. She kneels down and says that the Korean is suffering from all the hallmark symptoms of meningitis, including a rash on his lower back. "It's serious -- maybe contagious!" she sort-of-whispers. This attracts the attention of the blonde girl sitting in front of House. House scoffs at Cuddy's diagnosis, since (a) Cuddy is always wrong, and (b) they just attended a symposium on pandemics, so Cuddy probably just has them on the brain and is seeing them everywhere. You should have seen the uproar she created in the airport Starbucks when a nearby child coughed and Cuddy screamed that everyone was going to get smallpox. Cuddy says it's more like the Korean has pandemics on the brain, as well as the spinal cord -- his meningitis will spread and kill half the plane before they can land. The blonde speaks up at this, but House tells her there's nothing to worry about, and Cuddy orders her to "watch the movie," even though they didn't even turn the lights down for it, it's only playing on one screen in the front, and it looks really boring. I'd rather listen to my fellow passengers' conversations, too. Cuddy whispers that the Korean has a rash on his lower back, a telltale sign of meningitis and definitely not something you could get from a hangover. Unless, of course, you're hungover from a night of drinking at a frat house, in which case you might wake up with many strange things on your skin, like a drawing of a penis to your mouth. House shrugs the rash off as an allergic reaction to one of the many allergens on the plane. He mentions peanuts as a possibility, even though there are no peanuts on planes anymore. Thanks to those weakling peanut-allergy sufferers, all we get are either horrible pretzels or the detestable "party mix," which is basically pretzels with a Cheez-It and a bagel chip thrown in.

By Sara M

On the plane, the Korean is still barfing. The blonde girl watches him puke over the armrest until Cuddy finally wises up and closes the drapes. Meanwhile, those disapproving passengers from before can't take the puking and the smell anymore, and they abandon first class to sit with the peasants. I wonder if they'll sue the airline for this, like that guy who had to sit to a corpse during a long flight after a woman suddenly died in the economy section. He was angry because they allowed the dead woman's family to come up and grieve, and their wailing interrupted his enjoyment of the in-flight entertainment and kept him awake. The blonde again confronts House about the Korean, scared that Cuddy was right about a possible deadly pandemic after all. House just tells her to turn and face a different direction, because his amazing doctor skills tell him she's about to barf and he'd rather she not do it on him. Although, honestly, even barf would be an improvement over that horrible yellow Hawaiian shirt he's wearing. Of course, House is right, and the blonde turns and barfs. How did he know that she was about to barf when she didn't? The thing about barfing is that your body takes, like, ten minutes to prepare itself before it actually does it. So you usually know it's on its way. Unless you're in bed with food poisoning and feeling like that all the time, in which case the barf surprises you and you have to put your hand over your mouth and run to the bathroom and even then you don't quite make it. The girl pukes up something bright yellow, and even manages to get some on House's shoes despite his efforts to remain untouched. Cuddy's barf alarm goes off in first class and she runs back, but before she can point to this as a sign that she's right about the Korean having something contagious, House says that it's natural for humans to throw up if they smell or see someone else doing it. But that's not what's happening here, as Cuddy lifts the back of the blonde girl's shirt and sees that she has a distinctive rash. "I wasn't expecting that," House has to admit.

While Cuddy tends to the blonde, House announces to the entire plane that he needs Cottages so he can have someone off of whom to bounce his crazy ideas. He recruits a kid with floppy blond hair who can say "crikey, mate" to be his AirChase, ordering him to agree with everything House says. AirChase agrees. AirForeman is some guy who doesn't speak English, which is fitting, since the real Foreman might as well not speak English either for all the lines he gets. And AirCameron is a woman House instructs to be morally outraged at everything he says. She responds by bitchily telling House that he's about to use permanent marker on his makeshift whiteboard, the plane's movie screen. Also, I believe she's wearing a sweater vest. And she can do a raised eyebrow like no one's business. But will she sleep with AirChase?

By Sara M

I don't know how Chase and Cameron got assigned to check out Fran's house together, but they did. Chase wonders whether they should feed Harrington (who's still hanging out on the top of Fran's dresser) while they're there, but Cameron says his food bowl is full, and Cameron's heart is black and cold anyway, so she probably feasts on the blood of adorable kittens. She works for all of three seconds before asking Chase what he thinks of what Foreman said about their "relationship" interfering with work. Chase sarcastically says that Foreman was totally right, and he only agreed with Cameron so she'd "do" him in "some old lady's house." "Well played," Cameron says, her mouth turning up into what is probably supposed to be a seductive smirk. She shoves Chase onto the bed while he weakly protests that they should be working. She doesn't think they need to look for toxins there, since they both think Fran has a brain tumor. And it's not like they've ever been surprised by cases before where the culprit turned out to be environmental, right? Oh, except for at least one case per season. I don't approve of Foreman's need to bring Chase and Cameron's relationship up all the time in front of colleagues and whoever else might be wandering the PPTH halls, but he does have a point that it's interfering with their work. Chase doesn't want to have sex in front of Harrington, though. Neither did Fran. Is Harrington like the Bush's Baked Beans dog or something? Who cares if he's watching? He can't tell anyone what he saw or use his cell phone to take a secret video of it to post on the internets. "Haven't you had anybody watch before?" Cameron asks, like she has. Please. You know, I'm starting to think Cameron's never had sex before, the way she's acting.

While the Korean guy looks on his way off this mortal coil, the blonde, who has now scored a nice big bed in first class, panics that she's going to die. You know what? I think the blonde faked this to get first-class seats. I'd paint a rash on my back and throw up too if it got me such comfy accommodations for such a long flight. Cuddy dotes on the two ill passengers, and then she goes over to House, who has earplugs stuffed in his nostrils to keep out the puke smell while he relaxes with some more alcohol. He reports that none of pilots ate the seafood, which is a pity, because he was hoping to land the plane himself. It's called House, not Walker, Texas Ranger. Come on now. Although if House had had to land the plane himself, I would have given this episode an A+. If he had done it while making fun of the air traffic control people over the radio, I would have rallied to have the site code changed so I could give it an A++. This is something to consider if this show ever goes into Season 8 and ideas get scarce. Because Cuddy apparently really wants everyone to be doomed to die of meningitis before the plane can land, she says that if it is meningitis, their patients will be showing neurological symptoms soon. House orders the Korean guy to stand up so they can see if that's the case. House only knows enough Korean to say "is your sister over eighteen," though, so he has to use the time-honored Ugly American tradition of yelling in English slowly and loudly while making hand gestures. The Korean guy somehow understands what House is asking and stands up for a second before his shaky legs give out and he collapses. That looks like a neurological symptom to House and Cuddy, who just watch him fall on his face. After a second, House sucks on his teeth. It's pretty hilarious.

The Hooker With A Heart Of Gold tries to escape PPTH, only to be caught by Wilson on her way to the elevators. She says she has an "important client" and should be going. Wilson asks her if she's close to Fran, because he has to give her the bad "you might have cancer" news and thinks she should have a friend there. "Oh God," Robin says. "Oh God" is like her catchphrase at this point. She says it about everything! Mammograms, Venezuelan tattoos, clients passing out, everything!

Cameron does the mammogram while Robin watches and holds Fran's hand. Even though part of me resents them for taking time away from House and Cuddy on the plane of death, I'm starting to enjoy this odd pair. They have spin-off potential! Fran tells Robin it's okay for her to leave, but Robin says that she's sure Fran is scared, so Robin will stay with her. Plus, if she sees Fran's boobs, it'll be kind of like they had sex, and Robin can justify taking that money from her. Fran says that she's kind of hoping that it is breast cancer, since that would mean she didn't do something that caused her to get sick. Robin says that Fran shouldn't blame herself for having fun. Fran asks if Robin has any regrets. Robin's like, "Umm ... I'm a hooker who was about to have sex with an old lady. What do you think?" Finally, Cameron starts the mammogram. She takes the picture and is putting the other breast on the slab when Fran groans. Cameron thinks she's just in pain from having her boob squished, but Fran says that she's just gone blind in her right eye.

House and Cuddy have stripped the Korean down to his underwear and are checking him out for ataxia, another symptom of meningitis. House is hoping that the Korean's recent broken leg is what caused his trouble standing. Maybe he has radiation sickness from the X-rays performed by some third-world radiologist using old crappy equipment. This, House says, would account for why the guy is bald as well. Honestly, I wonder if a third-world radiologist with old crappy equipment would be better or worse than the Cottages with their evil equipment. After all, at least the third-world radiologists have training in that field. Cameron can't even give someone a simple mammogram without blinding her! Blonde chimes in to crap on House's clever diagnosis and say that she hasn't had any X-rays recently and she's not bald, either. House says that her symptoms are explained by being pregnant, even though the blonde says that that's not possible. House would be happy to kill the fetus for her if she wants.

House and the flight attendant help the Korean back into his seat while Cuddy sits herself, looking a little worse for wear. She calls out for House and groans a "you're wrong" before Lisa Edelstein does her very best to look like she's throwing up. Unfortunately, there's just no way to make bright yellow simulated vomit forcefully propel itself from her mouth like it's supposed to. Instead, it just drips onto the floor. I think they should have gone the Saturday Night Live route and put tubes in people's sleeves, then had them put their arms up to their mouths and spray copious amounts of fluid everywhere. It would look just as fake and be five times as awesome. Looking a little rattled, House takes the liberty of lifting up the back of Cuddy's shirt, where he finds a rash. Well, Cuddy, you might be dying, but at least you were right!

After the commercial, House listens to Cuddy's heart. It says: "I love you, House. We will be together for the series finale. Yes we will. But not before then because a House/Cuddy relationship on the show would be too weird." House reports that her heart rate is fine and her breasts remain firm, as if Cuddy didn't already know that. The flight attendant asks what she should tell the passengers, who are starting to panic. House tells her to tell them that there's nothing to worry about, even though, just between them: there is.

In a room that looks suspiciously similar to the mammogram room, Cameron has Fran cover her right eye while she watches a spiral on a screen. I think they're trying to brainwash her into getting better.

House shines a flashlight in Cuddy's face. She responds by throwing her hands up and waving them around, then declaring this sensitivity to light another symptom of meningitis. Maybe, but then again, I'd do the same thing if someone shined a flashlight in my face. That's annoying. "We need antibiotics!" Cuddy says. Apparently, another symptom of meningitis is thinking that people can pull antibiotics out of their asses. House ignores her, instead trying to diagnose Cuddy by smell. Hey, it's worked before. He sniffs around, explaining that different bacteria have different smells. Then he tries to get her pants down, claiming he needs to get a better look at the rash that has spread to her abdomen. Cuddy tells him to use his imagination. Seriously, House, if you want to get a look at Cuddy's bits that badly, just wait for her to die of meningitis first. The flight attendant comes in to say that three more passengers are sick. Cuddy says if they don't get drugs, the passengers will die. Well, if that's the case, then I'm sure the antibiotic fairy will stop by.

Wilson informs Robin that Fran doesn't have breast cancer. Robin interrupts to inform him that she just met Fran today. Wilson considers this, much like he considers every single thing anyone's said to him during this episode, then tells her to leave. Robin says Fran needs someone. "That's not your job," Wilson says. Well, actually ... it kind of is. People use prostitutes when they're lonely and need company. Robin agrees to leave, but gives Wilson her number and tells him to call her and let her know that Fran is okay.

Meanwhile, Cameron's trying to convince both Foreman and herself that you can have a relationship that's "just sex." Their chat is cut short when Fran slumps over and falls into a coma, as bored with Cameron's personal life bullshit as I am.

House and AirChase go around collecting pills from passengers, hoping to score enough antibiotics to save Cuddy. House finds one woman whom he instadiagnoses with herpes. She's surprised at this, but the guy sitting to her is not. He hands House the herpes meds that are right in his coat pocket. Oh, you ASSHOLE! He knew he had herpes, didn't tell her, and then gave it to her! That is horrible. House takes the bottle, but he's sure to give the woman a few tablets for herself. House is frustrated with his fellow passengers and their reluctance to give him their medicines, so he announces that people will die unless everyone gets more generous. I don't know why people are being so shitty about giving up their medicine; is it because they want to save it for themselves in case they get sick, or is it because drugs cost so damn much in America? Either way, House's speech gets results. That, or everyone has herpes and they're afraid House will tell on them to their spouses or girl/boyfriends if they don't do what he wants.

Back on the ground, Foreman is sure that Fran has a bleed in her brain. He wants to drill into her brain to fix it, even though he has no proof that there's even a bleed there and it hasn't shown up on any of the scans they've done. Cameron thinks they should do an LP first to be certain it's a bleed, but Foreman says that's just as dangerous as the brain drill. Cameron turns to Chase for support, and Foreman is all pissy, of course. Chase agrees with Cameron that they should know what's wrong with Fran before they dig into her brain, as if that's ever stopped House before. But Wilson agrees with the majority, and Fran will get an LP. You'd think Foreman would be used to being in the minority, but he's furious and says he hopes that the sex is damn good. And yes, Foreman, having sex with co-workers is unprofessional, but guess what? So is bringing it up all the time.

House looks through his stash of passenger drugs. There isn't much by way of antibiotics. They've got pills of something penicillin-related that Cuddy tells House to give to the Korean guy, followed by an epi-pen chaser for his allergy to penicillin. House wants Cuddy to take the pills instead, saying she's more worth saving since she speaks English. And because he loooooves her. But Cuddy bravely refuses. House says he doesn't want to waste pills if they don't know for sure it's meningitis. Cuddy's solution is to do an LP to confirm the meningitis, and here's where things go a little downhill for me in this episode. Parallel storytelling is cool most of the time, but in the episode, it's just a little too parallel with both Fran and the Korean getting LPs to confirm a diagnosis. Watching one LP is bad enough; I don't need to watch two. House reminds her that they're not in the best place to do an LP. They don't have the proper equipment, and the plane's unpredictable movements could cause House to paralyze the Korean. Cuddy says they can let the Korean die, then, and she'll get the meds. What about the blonde? Why doesn't she get the meds? Did she already die?

All things considered, I think I'd rather have an LP done by House on an airplane than by anyone at PPTH. Chase does the LP on Fran, while House does his on the Korean using a needle from the plane's first aid kit. He manages to collect the fluid and examine it while Cuddy yells at him for refusing to turn the plane around when they had the chance and condemning them all to death. House just leaves her there and goes back to the economy section. He hands AirCameron an open glass of spinal fluid, which you're never, ever supposed to do, and he gets on the PA. He announces to everyone on the plane that the Korean does in fact have bacterial meningitis, and he'll die before they land. Everyone on the plane mutters worriedly except for AirCameron, who just looks pissed off. House continues that lots of other passengers probably have it, too. So if they start feeling the following symptoms, they should get into the first-class quarantine ASAP. He lists them, and what do you know, everyone on the plane suddenly starts showing those exact symptoms! I think they're just following the blonde's lead and trying to score first-class seats. After House tells them to watch for tremors in their left hand and several passengers suddenly finds themselves with shaky left hands, House tells the flight attendant to "break out the bubbly" and then makes a second announcement: no one has meningitis after all! House explains that they have Conversion Disorder, a/k/a mass hysteria. They were so convinced that they had meningitis that they started showing its symptoms. What a bunch of tools. Seriously, how lame of them. They should all be ashamed of themselves. The blonde and Cuddy in first class cry out that House is wrong -- they most certainly do have meningitis. The blonde says her hand is shaking, and House explains that's not a symptom of meningitis. He just said it was to see if people would start showing it to test his mass hysteria theory. Blonde asks how she could get a rash, then. "Your mind controls your body," says the guy who refuses to believe that his leg pain might be worse on days when he's in emotional pain. House tells the rest of the plane that all they need to do is calm down and break up with their herpes-infected boyfriends, and the flight attendants will give them all free drinks.

House sits back down triumphantly and asks Cuddy how she feels. Cuddy, who still looks wicked sick, says she's feeling better. House opens the window shade since Cuddy no longer has fake photophobia, and she asks House how he figured it out. He says that when the LP was negative, and when Cuddy suddenly started yelling at him (a symptom of mass hysteria), he came up with the mass hysteria theory. I have to say, I'm a little disappointed that people aren't actually sick. Not only do I seriously doubt you can give yourself a rash with the power of your mind, but I feel cheated. But it's not over yet, as House says that the Korean still has a real illness they need to diagnose.

House goes back to the drawing board, or in this case, back to the movie screen. And the AirCottages are back, too! Cuddy asks if they're really necessary. They are. House asks them for suggestions. AirCameron, who is so much better than the real Cameron it's not even funny: "How long 'til we land?" She has her arms crossed and everything. I love her. House asks AirForeman if they're looking at a "clog" or a "leak" in the Korean's brain. "You are talking of toilet?" AirForeman asks. Cuddy's like, "For real? This is ridiculous." Meanwhile, she convinced herself she was dying of meningitis, so... your opinions are no longer valid, Cuddy. Like, ever. I am going to hold this against you for a long time. Cuddy suggests syphilis, but House doesn't think the Korean could score a hot date without speaking the language. Cuddy says that as long as he has a credit card and a condom in Singapore, he can get whatever he wants. "Ew!" says AirCameron. Ah, remember the days when sex was horrifying to the real Cameron, too? Anyway, if the Korean had a condom, then he wouldn't have syphilis, so, wrong again, Cudster.

But the condom suggestion gives House an idea. He mulls it over, mentioning the Korean's focal limb paralysis. AirChase asks if House is saying that the Korean has been paralyzed by a condom. No, House says -- by the cocaine that was inside the condom that the Korean swallowed. "Ew!" says AirCameron. AirCameron, you are awesome. Please stay on the show. I'm sure there's a place for you somewhere. Maybe she could be Cuddy's assistant or something. Or she could just poke her head into the meeting room and say "ew" once an episode without an explanation. That would be great. House says the only thing they can do for the Korean is operate. "Cool!" says AirChase.

Fran also needs an operation. Chase and Cameron watch from the OR balcony and try not to have sex with each other. Chase says that if Foreman was right about Fran having a bleed in the brain, maybe he's right about them, too. It occurs to Chase that having sex all over the place might be affecting their job performance. He says that having sex in a patient's bedroom while they're supposed to be looking for toxins isn't exactly on point. And then he has an idea: "The bowl was full!" he says. He leaves a confused Cameron in the OR balcony.

House prepares the Korean for surgery. He tells the AirCottages to hold the Korean down, as he's sure to flail around while House cuts him open with no anesthetic. Well, good thing he chose a guy who can't understand what he's saying, a woman, and a child for this task. AirCameron wants to make sure the Korean isn't contagious before helping out with this. And she's taken her jacket off so we can see that she is, indeed, wearing a sweater vest. House shovels some booze down the Korean's throat. Give him a piece of leather to bite down on, and it'll be just like surgery in the nineteenth century!

Fran gets some nice gas to knock her out.

Chase and his oxygen mask go back to Fran's home. He notes that the cat's food dish is still full. Harrington is still on top of the dresser, except now he's dead. Chase heads down to the basement and takes a look around. He finds a pipe that leads somewhere outside the house.

Fran is prepped for surgery.

House gets ready to slice into the Korean. The flight attendant helps, because she's the AirEvil Nurse Brenda. Or maybe she's the AirWilson. I can't decide. House tells them to hold the guy tight. AirChase lifts his hands off the Korean, who moans in pain. Then AirChase puts his hand back down on the Korean's shoulder and the Korean seems to be in less pain. House tells him to repeat that motion. AirChase does, and he gets the same result. House squeezes the guy's knee and notes that putting pressure on the Korean's joints seems to relieve his pain. Cuddy asks what that means. House says it means he was wrong "again." Well, I guess it's good that he found out now rather than, like, during or after the surgery. He asks for the Korean's wallet.

Foreman prepares to drill into Fran's head. This surgery prep sure is taking a while.

Chase goes outside and tries to follow the pipe from Fran's basement. He finds it connected to Fran's -door neighbor's house, which has a note on the door that reads, "Premises have been fumigated with methyl bromide. No admittance for 72 hours." Chase whips out his cell phone. Back in the OR, Cameron gets the call in time to stop the unnecessary surgery. Again, this is just a little too parallel with the plane stuff for me. While I like twists and turns on this show as much as anyone, there were one or two too many in this episode.

House finds a SCUBA certification card in the Korean's wallet. Cuddy doesn't think that's a big deal, but House follows that up with a receipt for a SCUBA equipment rental dated yesterday. Cuddy finally realizes what's going on and orders AirWilson/Evil Nurse Brenda to tell the pilot to drop the plane as low as possible, because the Korean has the bends. Since I already talked about the time Mitch had the bends on Baywatch last week, I have nothing to add to this. Except that I know more about SCUBA diving than the Korean, who apparently didn't pay attention to the part of his class where they told him not to surface too quickly or fly less than twenty-four hours after SCUBA diving. Flying at a lower altitude should keep the plane's pressure high enough to keep the Korean alive.

By Sara M

Fran gets some nice gas to knock her out.

By Sara M

Fran is prepped for surgery.

Foreman prepares to drill into Fran's head. This surgery prep sure is taking a while.

Chase tells the now-awake Fran that her house shares pipes with her neighbor since they used to be one estate a long time ago. The exterminator didn't know that, and when he fumigated the neighbor's house, he exposed Fran's house as well. That doesn't explain how she got worse once she was removed from the home and its poison, but, whatever. The motion sickness patch masked the initial effects of the poison. Wilson says Fran will be fine in a couple days, even though she's needlessly bald. Also, her cat died. Sorry about that. Fran notes that she learned a Valuable Lesson: her cat never left her house in his twelve years of life, and he died because of it. She thought her illness was punishment for going away when she was really punished for coming home. Actually, I think she was punished for sharing a pipe with her neighbor and for her neighbor hiring an exterminator who didn't do all of his homework.

By Sara M

The plane has landed, and the Korean is taken away via stretcher. House tells Cuddy that she owes him her life, even though her life was never actually in danger. She refuses to acknowledge this, although she really should if she wants House to keep her little plane fake sick freak-out a secret. "You're mean," House says. He takes a seat in his waiting wheelchair, which is pushed by the flight attendant, who graciously thanks him for everything he did and says that she's in New York every Monday. House appreciates her showing of gratitude and asks if she's "handicap accessible." I'm still not sure if that makes her the AirWilson or the AirEvil Nurse Brenda.

Wilson gives Robin a call. He awkwardly tells her what was wrong with Fran and that Fran will be fine. He also hopes Robin will be stopping by PPTH again. Well, I guess being with a high-class Hooker is better than living with one of your terminal cancer patients.

Cameron and Chase leave the hospital. Cameron says that House will be impressed with Chase's diagnosis. Chase doubts this, as well he should. Cameron thinks they should celebrate with some sex, but Chase suddenly says he wants "more." Cameron hints around that she doesn't, but Chase persists. He says this may have started off as a just sex thing in the beginning, but they both have feelings for each other now. Oh, wait -- only he has feelings. Cameron doesn't. "It was fun, that's it," she says, "and now it's over." She runs away, leaving Chase looking a little bit destroyed. Wow, that was really harsh. I know they had an understanding, and it's fine if Cameron doesn't have the same feelings for Chase that he has for her. It's a bummer for Chase and it's awkward for both of them, but it happens. All the same, she really could have been a little nicer about it and let him down easier. I guess all that sex still couldn't teach Cameron anything about interpersonal skills.

House TV Show - Flakes On A Plane - House Photos &amp; Videos, House Reviews &amp; House Recaps | TWoP

House TV Show - Flakes On A Plane - House Photos & Videos, House Reviews & House Recaps | TWoP