By Jacob
Johnny plays with the angel dress, which he somehow now has, because in Palm Springs, creepy finds you. Bob's cooking breakfast using the intense pressure of a stern speech about disappointing Gail O'Grady, then gives her a stern speech about something else. He's all fake grins, and her insane eyes are flattered by her toothpaste-colored polo. She yells at him for again bringing up how the foundation of their marriage is whoredom, and Johnny is, predictably, bewildered yet wounded.
Fairy God-Fairy! Fucking finally! Jessie Jo is the only worthwhile person on this entire show. He comforts me so much when he talks about things. Like sobriety for example, sometimes he talks about that. He makes Nikki help him move the coffee table around the bungalow, and all those assorted tchotchkes and knickknacks and doilies and crap that old gay dudes have so he can practice his drag routine that all gay dudes have in those sweet stiletto pumps that every goddamn gay dude has. Cliff shows up and Jessie Jo threatens to shoot him in the "narrow behind." Cliff looks just so awesome, even this early in the AM. Cliff apologizes for getting to second base with his BFF's MILF in the very room where BFF shot himself, and then lying about it, and explains how totally upset he is, but this is not about him and his sad feelings, so Nikki tells him to go to hell. Maria has now called Cliff one thousand times.
More of that shitty music this show is all about leads to Liza's garage, where Johnny apologizes for ignoring her at the party, then for stealing the dress. She tells him to leave and then Johnny spills about the love connection between Maria and Cliff, and how gross it is. Liza gives her patented "Johnny There's Something You Should See" and shows him a pointless video of Eddie whining about his parents' wedded non-bliss. Eddie's an even worse actor than Liza, and if you put their badness together you get Greta. Eddie has figured out about Cliff, it would seem, and this somehow led to his death. These people are so fucking stupid, I'm sorry. They jump to the weirdest conclusions, and then they're right, because the show's even stupider than they are.