Episode Report Card DeAnn Welker: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Hiro Quixote and Ando Panza
By DeAnn Welker | Season 4 | Episode 13 | Aired on 01.04.2010
Tokyo. Ando looks perplexed as Hiro tells him they must go to the land of swamp dragons and find the castle in order to rescue Dr. Watson. Ando, exasperated, says he heard him the first time. Hiro asks Sancho if his communicator isn't functioning, and sits down and writes "Swamp dragon" and "Castle Arkham." Ando doesn't get it, so Hiro says, "Transmission jammed at the source, Captain." I thought this amusing at first, but I think it goes on way too long and means nothing. I hate that nothing is happening on this show, yet they keep on making filler episode after filler episode instead of developing the plot. Kimiko comes in with the number of a top neurosurgeon, but Ando stops her from calling the number because he thinks Hiro's trying to tell them something. Kimiko protests that they have to get Hiro help since he's all the family she has left. Ando explains what Hiro was saying, and surmises from Hiro's use of Dr. Watson that these are clues. You know, because of Sherlock Holmes; get it? Yeah, I don't either, because Hiro would not be giving them clues if he could explain it clearly. He doesn't know how to communicate, so he's talking gibberish. But when Ando says Hiro wants them to figure something out, Hiro jumps up and with his "Yatta!" hands shouts, "Elementary!" Ando explains to Kimiko and the show's audience (who they seem to have forgotten actually get geek references) that it's like someone took a shabu spoon and stirred Hiro's fanboy brain. Thanks for the anvil, Ando. Hiro: "We must prepare for our quest in the Danger Room." Ando explains to Kimiko that's where the X-Men train. Ando gets it: The Danger Room is also where Hiro keeps his comic books. He leaves, and Hiro tells Kimiko, "Good you have done, Princess. Defeat the dark side, we will." She cries.
Emma's. Samuel tells her he's interested in people like them. He knows she can see what people hear, and feel them even more. She wonders how he knows that, and he says he knows many people with gifts and one of them is Lydia the Tattooed Lady, who helped her find Emma. He says they're all connected, and Emma invites him in. He apologizes for not telling her the cello was from him (this part I actually do like, because Samuel was there when Emma first noticed cello music, remember?), and says it was hard to part with, because it was for someone special to him, whom he was close with until one day he lost her. They hit us over the head with Hiro's fanboy references but give us nothing on this? Samuel tells Emma the cello's found its proper home, but she's not so sure given the ginormous crack in her wall from last time she played. He tells her that wasn't the cello's fault; it was her own fear, which is why he's here: to help her let go of that and find her "true ability." She's like, "True ability?" Isn't seeing sounds a superpower?! Oh, right, it's not. Apparently, the writers realized that and are changing tracks now. He explains he needs her help finding another hero; he can't find him because he's been overwhelmed by his gift, which is basically causing moss and grass to grow in his footsteps. He says the guy lost touch with everyone and lives in Central Park. Emma doesn't understand how she can help.
At the Carnival, Claire's carrying a box of stuffed animals. What a helper! She hands them to a carnie and then notices Eli's still stalking her. She walks away quickly, but he's a replicator, so he surrounds her. She runs into the funhouse and he chases her through the carnival (it's odd that a man, in triplicate, can chase a young blonde girl through a carnival without anyone noticing or caring) where Sylar saw his bad deeds and then Edgar killed Warden Leo. One Eli tells the other Elis to cover all the exits, but I have to wonder why he has to tell himself that instead of just, I don't know, doing it. Aren't they all him? Or am I confused about how replication works? In the funhouse, Claire looks replicated, with all the mirrors and he tells her, "Yeah, nice trick." She knocks him out and it's luckily the real guy, so the others disappear too. She runs to the trailer and looks through the files. There's one on her (which I'm skeptical of; I don't believe Noah would have a file on his daughter), one on Gabriel Gray, and other heroes we know (Maya, D.L., Parkman, etc.). She sees a map, some landscape pictures, and a picture of Samuel and Joseph as boys. Then she's stopped suddenly by something beyond her control and spun around, and knocked out the door of the trailer. Which, of course, means it's Puppetmaster Doyle. He picks her up and tosses her around, then stands her up and throws her against the trailer. He asks her what she thinks she's doing, "Barbie." Commercials, including Flavor Flav for Sprint. He must have come cheaper than Luke Wilson.
Doyle's grilling Claire on what she was doing. She tries to tell him that Samuel's bad, but he likes it here and thinks Claire must be a spy, working for her father. She says she isn't and came here on her own, believing in Samuel, but now she realizes Samuel's collecting people with abilities. Doyle says that's what a family is (uh ... no) and he's not going to let her ruin it for everyone. She tells him about the map of the valley and that Samuel's planning something (was she not there the two times that Samuel TOLD HER he's planning something: to settle them in a permanent home? I mean, sure he's lying, but she knew he had a plan. When did Claire get so idiotic?), but Doyle just wants in on whatever Samuel's doing.
Hiro's Danger Room, apparently. He's reading 9th Wonder as Ando repeats that they must rescue Dr. Watson from Castle Arkham in the land of the swamp dragon. They argue about whether Ando's Hiro's sidekick, and Hiro's argument -- "Everyone knows that Sancho Panzo is the sidekick of the great Don Quixote" -- sort of works. The captions in this scene change from white to yellow for some reason, too, which is weird ["Thanks to astute reader Mark for writing to let us know that the color changed when Hiro went from speaking Japanese to Spanish." -- DeAnn]. Anyway, Hiro goes on that "The castle Arkham is in the great Spanish land where Curt Connors swims with the swamp dragons." Ando figures out that Curt Connors is some sort of Lizard enemy of Spider-Man, and that he lived in Florida, which was a Spanish land. Oh, and there are alligators (swamp dragons) there. Hiro: "Elementary!" Ando then realizes Arkham is the asylum in Batman, so maybe Hiro wants to go to a place called Arkham in Florida. He Googles a psychiatric hospital of that name. Hiro stands and bows to Ando, telling him he's given this knight the chance to right the wrongs in his life, and he's eternally grateful. Ando guesses he is the sidekick and everyone's happy. Especially me, because hopefully now they'll do something other than jabber to each other about the geekiest stuff in the world.
Central Park. Samuel's teaching Emma about her true ability: Her emotions can become one with the music; she can bring people to her like a siren. He tells her to just play, concentrating on the mossy/grassy guy, and make her prayers into song. She plays, and it's all colorful and dumb. The guy she's been beckoning walks up, all bearded and dirty and homeless. Emma smiles as Samuel gets up to greet him, and tell him it's all right and to "Let the music fill you up." The guy leans against a tree, and all the leaves on it turn from brown to green before their eyes. What a totally useless skill. I mean, I guess you could use it to produce food for the hungry, so it's not as useless as some others, but still: Aren't there seasons for a reason, vegetation-wise?