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Peter bargains with the Shamrock Boys to get his identity back, and the deal involves Peter helping the boys steal a shitload of money from an armored truck. He uses his TK and successfully saves them from capture, but then one of the boys decides he wants all the money for himself and shoots Peter to make his point. Fortunately, Peter's chest poops out the bullets and he survives to use some TK on the offender. As his reward for saving their money and their lives, Peter gets a Shamrock Boys tattoo and a kiss from Caitlin.
Maya and Alejandro spend far too much time running around from the police until finally they try and steal a car and get caught, and Alejandro goes to jail, and then Maya leaks that black shit from her eyes again and the guards go down and she rescues Alejandro and then he absorbs the black shit again, some more, and Maya cries and whines and all that and it's boring all over again. They manage to escape with the help of a stoner with a Nissan, though, so let's hope they get to America soon.
D.L. apparently died last season, because he's buried in a cemetery and Niki and Micah say their goodbyes to him so that they can run off. Niki leaves Micah with Uhura so that Niki can go and join The Company and get cured of her superpowers. Tobby the Company Elf tells her that he'll be happy to cure her but she has to do something for The Company first. We don't find out what that is yet.
Claire confronts West about her toe-clipping incident and tries to lie about it, saying she was just giving herself a pedicure. With some hedge clippers. West totally calls her on it and wins her over when he flies her up into the sky in the middle of broad fucking daylight because who cares about being captured for your superpowers when love is in the air?
Ando discovers a hidden compartment in the sword Hiro left behind, and it contains a bunch of scrolls that tell the story of Hiro and his Hero. Just in case we missed the last two episodes, the scrolls provide a full replay of the entire storyline so far. And once Kensei defeats the Ninety Angry Samurai and gets the girl, Hiro decides to leave to go back to his own time, only to change his mind and stick around for some reason.
And finally, everyone's favorite villain is back and boy is Sylar royally pissed off that his powers seem to have disappeared along with some of his internal organs, courtesy of the sword stab from Hiro. Candice rescued him from Kirby Plaza and put him back together, but since his powers are gone, Sylar's less than grateful to her. In the end, he decides to restore his powers by taking hers, but the brain buffet he partakes in doesn't work and he's still powerless. And trapped on an island around the corner from the Lostaways. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Previously on Heroes: Claire cut off her toe to see if she's related to a lizard; Mohinder found the Haitian Sensation in Haiti, of all places, and then cured him and sent him on his way to Mr. Bennet; West the SuperStalker continued his habit of creepily watching Claire through windows and witnessed the Great Toe Regeneration of 2007; Peter saved Sir Shamrock's little sister from a bunch of Irish thugs and learned his name in return; and Hiro discovered that Takezo Kensei is more than just a personal hero to him, he's actually a REAL Hero and seems to be able to come back to life after being shot through with a bunch of arrows.
We begin this episode in Ireland, where Peter is asking Sir Shamrock what he has to do to get his life back. Sir Shamrock says that Peter just has to do them a favor, and it seems to revolve around Celtic taking on AC Milan. One of the Shamrock Boys pipes up, "We're talkin' football, yeah? Soccer?" Peter just shoots him a glance. "I lost my memory; I'm not stupid." Heh. You're also not shirtless, Peter, so I'm not really paying attention to anything you say.
The grand plan that Sir Shamrock has come up with involves robbing an armored car of the takings from the local booking joint. All Sir Shamrock wants Peter to do is distract the guards so the gang can get them out of the way and get its hands on the money. Sir Shamrock declares that if Peter helps them get this money, he'll get the box with his identity, and everybody wins. That's when Peter overhears the other Shamrock Boy think, "Not everybody, Sideshow. That money is mine." Peter, stupidly not remembering that he can hear people's thoughts, immediately turns and accuses the guy of speaking all this out loud. Unfortunately, all this does is make everyone jump on Peter's ass. Sir Shamrock shows him a Celtic tattoo on his forearm that he calls his "family crest." He says that he trusts his "brothers" a hell of a lot more than he trusts Peter.
Somewhere in Mexico. The Black Goo Duo is still stumbling for the border. Alejandro wants Maya to stop and take a break, because she's a big hot mess and he's not sure she can make it any further. She doesn't want to stop because they're almost at the border. So Alejandro gets the bright fucking idea to steal a car. In broad daylight. Off a busy street corner. He breaks the window and, of course, there's a cop right near by, so he sees all this and immediately gives chase. They run off with him following. As I watched this with my fellow recappers at TWoP Towers, the responses varied from, "Oh for God's sake -- you already BROKE INTO THE CAR, why don't you steal it and DRIVE AWAY instead of running? You're not getting anywhere ON FOOT!" to, "Maybe now they'll RUN for the border instead of SHUFFLING. Christ on a cardboard cutout of Sister Mary Sunshine, GET TO AMERICA ALREADY."
Apparently, I'm not the only one who's irritated by this storyline.
So, run, run, run. Chase, chase, chase. Only Maya gets away and Alejandro is captured. Big shocker there. I wonder if Maya's going to think this is her fault. I wonder if she's going to cry and moan and make black shit come out of people's eyes. I wonder if I care.
Vegas. It's time to check in with Micah and Niki Sanders. If you were thinking that at the end of the last season, D.L. looked to be in bad shape, then you were on the right track; apparently, he's dead. We know this because Micah and Niki are having a serious conversation about leaving Las Vegas and getting a clean start and they're doing this in a cemetery. Micah doesn't want to leave his father, but Niki thinks they need to get out of town to start their lives over. Micah runs to his father's grave and, in a nice touch, the epitaph reads: "Daniel Lawrence Hawkins, 1976 - 2007, Father, Husband, Hero." Aw.
Fake Maui. Trust me, it's an illusion. As you will soon see. Two beach chairs are set up on the sand beneath an umbrella made of palm fronds. A cell phone rings and a comely redhead wearing a pink bikini picks it up. She tells someone that "he" is fine but still sleeping. Just then, there's a groan in the background, and the girl hangs up the phone and turns to the person in the chair to her. It's Sylar! He's alive! The girl asks him if he wants to go for a dip in the ocean and Sylar just groggily asks where he is. She says they're in Maui. He asks who she is, and she introduces herself as "Michelle," but then quickly clarifies that she used to go by the name of Candice. So it's our old shape-shifter friend!
Candice says that after she yanked him off of Kirby Plaza, the police have kind of been looking for her, so she's decided to permanently change her appearance to this buxom Michelle character. Sylar's kind of slow on the uptake, because he just goes, "You dragged me off of Kirby Plaza?" She reminds him about how he got stabbed in the chest with a samurai sword and informs him that he's had eight surgeries so far. "Don't move," she says, "or you'll rip your stitches." Sylar looks down all, "But...I don't have any stitches! And I'm wearing a hideous red Hawaiian shirt! Help me!" Candice tells him about her special talent for making illusions, and Sylar takes her hand and asks her to show him what's really going on. "Honey?" she sneers. "You really don't want to know." He yanks her toward him. "SHOW ME!" he snaps. Unfortunately, this sudden movement causes him some pain and, as Candice dissolves the illusion, Sylar sees that he's actually in some bunker somewhere with an eight-inch wound in his gut. He screams with pain as we fly out to the Total Eclipse of the Heroes.
Casa de Bennet. Tonight's episode title comes to us from the top of the Bennet house, where it follows the line of the roof. I love that they're still doing the fun title placement, by the way. It's just a bit of goofy comic-book detailing that I thoroughly enjoy. Claire's in her room, reading Papa Suresh's book. Her dad pokes his head in and says that Mrs. Bennet made waffles. Claire must have hidden the book, because it's no longer in her hands. Bennet enters and picks up a stuffed bear and sits across from her, saying that she was right to be angry back at Klinko's; she wanted to talk to him and he just yelled at her. They apologize to each other, and he tells her that if she has any questions, she should feel free to go ahead and ask them. As long as they're in the privacy of their home, of course.
So Claire asks what would happen if someone in this town were to find out about her powers. Bennet tells her that they'd have to run again and go deeper into hiding; possibly even forgoing jobs and schools altogether. Claire just nods, and her father says with a smile that that's just the worst-case scenario. But Claire knows better, and the second she gets to school, she goes right over to West and informs him that "it was a pedicure." West is like, "Where'd you learn how to give a pedicure, Gitmo? I've seen pedicures, sweetheart, and they don't involve REMOVING DIGITS FROM YOUR FEET." He walks off after snarking at her that she sucks at pedicures, and she follows him, swiftly moving from trying to explain herself to demanding to know why the hell he's skulking around outside her house. West just lamely responds that he was trying to drop off the book he was telling her about. Claire's like, "Where'd you learn how to drop off books, the Peeping Tom Academy for Burgeoning Stalkers? I've seen people drop off books before, dude, and it doesn't involve STARING AT PEOPLE THROUGH THEIR WINDOWS."
She tells him that she's not interested in starting a book club with him and that he should just stay the hell away from her. He agrees that he will, if she agrees to own up to the fact that she cut off her own toe. Claire's like, "I dropped a bottle of red polish and it just looked like I was bleeding and I have really small toes and I lost my pinkie toe in a bizarre gardening accident and thank you so much for bringing up the past because now I'm going to cry!" And West is like, "You suck at lying, sister, cuz I SAW your toe grow back and you're kind of cute and we should continue fighting like this because we're totally just bickering because we really like each other." And Claire is like, "You're a smartass. Kiss me." And West is like, "Stop lying and own up to the fact that you grow limbs and maybe I will!" And Claire is like, "Uch! You're adorably smug! I totally want you! But I'm going to class so you'll think I don't!" And West is like, "Fine! Don't cut off any toes along the way! And I'll just watch your pert little butt from here, thanks!"
Molly Has Two Daddies. Matt is sleeping sitting up again, watching over Molly. He wakes with a start when he hears someone else in the apartment. He grabs his gun and makes for the kitchen, only to find Mohinder there, making some chai tea. They discuss how Mohinder's no longer going to be a field man for The Company and how he's going to be placed in New York from now on. Mohinder thinks this is great, because this means he can help with Molly now. Matt, however, thinks this is lame, because it means that Mohinder's going to be doing his spy work in their backyard. "Someone's grouchy when he doesn't get his sleep," quips Mohinder. Heh. You just know that Ramamurthy and Grunberg are camping this shit up when the cameras aren't rolling. The situation is just way too ripe for comic platform-shoe-wearing, feather-boa-sporting gold.
Matt tells Mohinder that Molly's struggling at school and having nightmares and that he has his hands full with her and can't be arsed to baby-sit Mohinder too. Mohinder's like, "Who the hell said I needed babysitting?" Matt's like, "I did! Because you're a dang professor and you're not 007, and you're too pretty for spy work!" Mohinder's like, "I am not too pretty! And I swore to bring The Company down! And stop harping on me like a jealous fishwife!" Matt's like, "The Company abducted me and they're evil and you can't handle it and I don't want you to die and I just want you to hold me!" Mohinder's like, "For the last time, I WILL NOT HOLD YOU!" Their lovers' quarrel wakes Molly, and she runs into Mohinder's arms, and he tells her he's never leaving her again. Matt just stares at Molly jealously, because it should be HIM in Mohinder's arms, not her! Stupid kid!
Tokyo. Ando's sitting at work, playing a video game on his computer. His superior catches him at it. Ando apologizes, saying he was just taking a break, but Boss Man clearly doesn't like him and tells him that just because he was Mr. Nakamura's errand boy for a bit, that doesn't mean he can do whatever the hell he wants whenever the hell he wants. Boss Man orders Ando to get back to work and then leaves. Instead of going back to work, Ando opens one of his file drawers and pulls out the samurai sword with the "S" symbol on it that Hiro gave him. He touches the hilt and then sees something carved in the bottom. "ANDO OPEN," reads Ando. He does as it says and sees something inside. He turns it over and five tiny scrolls drop into his hand. He opens one and starts to read.
"Ando," says Hiro in a voiceover, "I write to you from the greatest adventure of my life." As Ando reads and Hiro talks, we get a visual walkthrough of the entire Hiro and Kensei story. The voiceover ends when we pick up where the last episode left off, with Kensei realizing that his wound has healed and he's not dead. He gets up, baffled and confused, and wonders aloud why there's all this blood all over him, but no wound. Hiro tells Kensei that he has a power, and that now, he can truly become a Hero! Kensei thinks this is impossible. To prove to him that it is, in fact, possible, Hiro rather hilariously jerks the remaining arrows out of Kensei's chest, and David Anders exhibits stellar comic timing when he takes a moment's pause and then shouts, "Auuuuugh!" Heh.
Kensei witnesses for himself the healing of his wounds. Instead of being jazzed about this turn of events, Kensei thinks Hiro's cursed him, and he gathers his armor and walks off. Hiro cheerfully tries to convince him that this is a gift, not a curse, but Kensei's having none of it. As Hiro rattles off all the future tasks this new power will help Kensei to complete, Kensei just calls him a devil and rides off on his horse. Hiro tries to get him to wait, but he's already gone.
Too Ra Loo Ra Loo Ra Pub. Oh, thank God. Peter's shirtless again. His attractiveness wanes when I realize that he's trying to conjure up blue fireballs from his hand by holding it out and shouting, "Lightning! Sparks! Lightning!" Heh. Caitlin appears in the doorway and innocently asks if that's really how that power works. Peter's not sure, but so far? Nothing's working. He knows he can do all these things, but he feels powerless. Caitlin sympathizes with him, saying that it's tough not knowing who you are. Peter puts on his shirt. I go get snacks and some board games, because I'm suddenly not interested in anything that's going on. All I'm saying is, if you want me to watch the rest of the episode, taking (and keeping) the shirt off might be a really bright idea.
Caitlin suggests that Peter might be an extraterrestrial that's escaped from a government facility. Peter kind of laughs at this and raises an eyebrow. She then says that he shouldn't worry about tonight's activities; she'll be there to get his back. Peter asks why he should trust her, and she says that she hasn't told any of the gang exactly what it is that Peter can do; apparently, they just think he's a bruiser and a half, due to the way he crippled the rival gang members. Peter asks why she would lie on his behalf, and Caitlin just says, "Girl's gotta have her secrets." What she really means is, "Take your shirt off."
Somewhere in Mexico. Alejandro's getting led into the jail. He sees the wanted poster for him and Maya on the wall. Neither of the cops in the room seems to see it. Alejandro gets shoved into a cell. The stoner in the cell sits up and says, "Dude. You look like ass." Well, that's not very neighborly, is it? You can't just say a simple, "Hi! How are you? Whatchya in for?" How hard would that be, really? Go back to sleep, stoner. Maybe you'll dream of 'shrooms and boobs.
Lizard High. The students shuffle into science class. Claire takes her seat near the front. West enters and parks it right to her, setting her nostrils flaring. They seethe at each other until the teacher announces that they're going to talk about mitosis today. West immediately raises his hand and says he has a question about yesterday's topic on lizards and regeneration. He blabbles something about how he knows lizards can regenerate, but humans can't, but what if a human mated with a lizard? Could their offspring regenerate? Because he thinks he's met a lizard girl! Claire looks at him like, "Bitch? What you playin' at?" The teacher thinks this isn't really a productive conversation, but West just spews, "But seriously -- what if that lizard girl were to...accidentally cut off an arm, or a leg, or you name the appendage, in some horrifying...spa debacle." Hee. Okay, that's kind of funny. It's stupid, and he's still creepy, but he's cute and snarky. Dammit. I'm starting to like West.
The teacher wants to know where West is going with this. He just responds that he wants to know if the lizard girl's arm would reattach itself. Claire realizes that he's just baiting her, so she does the smart thing: she gets up and leaves. Because that's not too obvious or anything. He's talking about a girl regenerating her limbs, and Claire huffs off because...she's a girl who regenerates her limbs. I'm sure I could fanwank that the rest of the students would just think West is making fun of Claire's questions about lizards from the day before, but I still think it's kind of idiotic that Claire wouldn't be cognizant of the fact that running off in tears during a discussion of regeneration really isn't the best way to remain in hiding, you know?
Tokyo. Back again with Ando as he catches up on the Ballad of Hiro and Kensei. Hiro tells Ando that turning Kensei into a hero and righting history won't be easy, especially since he himself has fallen in love with the girl who's supposed to fall in love with Takezo. Yaeko and Hiro walk through nature as Hiro tries to convince her that Kensei didn't run away. They come across Kensei in the distance, and Hiro says he'll go gather up the hero and bring him over to her.
Once there, Hiro realizes that Kensei's just cutting his arm over and over again to watch it heal. He tells Takezo that he's a hero too, and that he can travel through space and time. He proves this by blinking his eyes and instantly winding up on the opposite side of the tree Kensei's leaning on. He's also managed to take the knife right out of Kensei's hand. Hiro explains that some people think these powers are a gift from God; others think it's evolution. He tells Kensei that he can heal from any wound, and Kensei runs down a laundry list of potential wound-makers -- sword, snake, fire -- and Hiro confirms that he'll be able to heal from all of them. "This'll make me richer than the Pope!" crows Kensei, dashing Hiro's hopes that his hero will take the higher road with his powers. He reminds Kensei that he's supposed to defeat White Beard and the 90 Hungry Ronin. During the original viewing of this episode, I thought it was the 90 Angry Ronin, not the 90 Hungry Ronin, but I guess if the 90 Ronin are really that hungry, they're probably pretty angry too.
Kensei tells Hiro that, since he's so obsessed with his story, why doesn't HE handle White Beard and the Hungry Ronin and all the other stupid-ass tasks he has no interest in performing. Hiro says that Kensei has to stop walking away from his destiny, and Kensei just laughs that that no one's going to stop him from walking away, because no one can! "This is extraordinary!" He plops on his helmet, and Hiro puts his hand on his shoulder and blinks, whisking them away to the footsteps of the 90 Hungry Ronin. Or, you know, a TV studio somewhere with five green screens and some footage stolen from a 1970s samurai extravaganza. For real. HD rocks and everything, but boy does it ever point out some less-than-stellar CGI work.
Hiro tells Ando in his voiceover that he knew Kensei wouldn't become a hero unless Hiro forced him to do so the hard way. So he brings Kensei to the foot of the home of the 90 Hungry Ronin and tells him that he has to get the fire scroll that's at the top of the steps. 90 Hungry CGI figures pour down the steps and ready themselves to fight the interloper as Hiro zips out of the picture and back to safety.
Lizard High. Claire's crying angrily on the landing of some exterior steps. West approaches and says, "So I take it you're annoyed." Gee, no, jackhole. She's perfectly fucking happy that you tried to OUT her in SCIENCE CLASS. Claire turns and demands to know what it is that he wants from her. He wants her to admit she's different. "Okay, fine!" she snaps. "I'm a freak, alright? I am such a freak, in fact, that I have to tiptoe around this school pretending to be a brainless Barbie doll so nobody notices how different I am! Cause if they found out? I'd be carted off to some human zoo so I could be poked and prodded at for the rest of my life. So yeah, West, I'm different, and you can tell the world if you want to because I am tired of pretending to be someone I'm not." "Claire," he says, stepping closer to her, "shut up."
And then he lifts her in his arms and shoots up into the sky.
No, I'm not kidding.
And it's totally cheesy and silly and I made fun of it when I watched it the first time, but now I kind of dig it, even though it's about two steps away from having "Can You Read My Mind?" slinging across the soundtrack, because this show, after all, is about comic-book heroes and, let's face it, some comic books are cheesy and over the top, and the only thing that's kind of ruining this scene for me is how West shoots Claire a look that is so portentous and serious that it looks like he's having the world's largest bowel movement right now. ["I was so betting at the beginning of the sentence that what was ruining it for you was that he had his shirt on." -- Miss Alli] Other than that, this is all kinds of stupid fun. I just have to ignore the fact that it's broad daylight, there's very little cloud cover, and up until this particular moment in time, Claire's been actively trying to hide her powers from the world in order to avoid capture. Yeah. Aside from all of that, this is one Cracker Barrel cheese ball of goodness.
Ireland. The Shamrock Boys are getting ready for their heist. Peter is in a car with Caitlin, waiting for the signal to take out the guards. She tells him to be careful, and he gets out of the car and heads off to do his duty. The guards approach the door of the booking joint and say that they're there for the money pickup. Peter walks up and shouts at them that he wants his money back. Thankfully, he doesn't even ATTEMPT an Irish accent. The guards move toward him, and they're distracted enough that they don't notice the Shamrock Boys moving in on them with their guns. Peter and one of the Boys secure the guards and cart them off while Ricky and the other Boy wait for the guy with the money to come out of the booking joint.
Seconds later, he exits, pushing a locked box in front of him. The Boys cock their guns, and the guard nervously steps back. Peter waits over by the tied-up guards. Unfortunately, before the Boys can grab the loot, the nervous guard hits a button by the door, and an alarm goes off. Ricky points his rifle in the guy's face, but he's not really a killer, so he just rams him in the head with the butt and the guy goes down. He follows after the other two Boys, who are carrying the box between them. A couple of guards come out of the doorway and start shooting at the Boys, but Peter steps in and TK's the armored car across the street so that it blocks the guards' way. Caitlin sees this. Both she and Peter seem surprised that this has happened. Peter runs to the car and shouts at her to get driving already! They peel off.
Superstudio of Superheroes. Tobby is paging through some of Isaac's comics as several FBI-looking dudes catalog paintings and other items. Mohinder enters and incredulously asks if this isn't Isaac Mendez's place. Tobby confirms that it was, until Sylar killed the poor bastard. Now it's Mohinder's lab. Tobby tells him that the lab was actually built for him and that he has great value at The Company. Such great value, in fact, that they've assigned people to keep a close eye on him and anticipate his every need. Mohinder thinks this is excessive, not to mention kind of creepy, and he says that he prefers to work alone. "You're part of the family now," says Tobby, totally freaking Mohinder out. He leaves, and Mohinder just looks at the floor as if it's going to sprout spies or something.
1671. The Land Of Hungry Ronin. And Meandering Plots I'm Quickly Growing Tired Of. Hiro and Yaeko are waiting on Kensei, who's still off fighting the Ronin. Yaeko worries that he's been killed, or, worse yet, that he's run off to avoid being killed. Hiro asserts that Kensei is coming and that he knows she is waiting for him. Yaeko says that sometimes, Kensei seems like two men; one a brute, the other gentle. She is, of course, rightly identifying both the real Kensei and Hiro-as-Kensei. One's a charming cad, the other's a big old girl. Can you tell which one I prefer?
Yaeko says that for a moment, back under the cherry blossoms, she felt like she was home. It seems that Hiro might take this chance to tell her that was him beneath the trees with her, but Kensei shows up with the fire scroll and steals his thunder. Yaeko runs to him, and they embrace. She says she'll never doubt him again and throws him a kiss and, to his credit, Kensei actually looks like the battle has softened him a bit. Hiro, of course, looks like he's about to cry, because he's a big fat baby.
New Orleans. Niki and Micah arrive at a house in a cab. They get out as Niki tells Micah that things are going to be better now. Since Micah's going to stay with some random family members he doesn't even know, he's not sure how things are improving. Niki reminds him of his promise about not using his powers, and Micah thinks this is stupid, because what's the point of them having all these abilities if they're not going to use them? Niki says that the point is that this is their chance at a normal life; he's going to stay with normal people, and they wouldn't understand his special powers. Well, considering that the family member you're going to be staying with is Commander Uhura from the original Star Trek, I'd say that the word "normal" may not be what you'd use in this situation. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
Niki tearfully insists that she's not going to be gone long and that when she comes back, they'll be together. But she has to do this. Micah says that's what she always says before she does something bad. She hugs him and says she loves him, and then they go to the front door of the house. Niki knocks, and the door opens, and they both smile at the person they see, and, of course, it's Commander Uhura and she's gorgeous, but also a little spooky, and you totally know she has superpowers and/or is into voodoo because this is New Orleans and everyone is into voodoo down there because that's what Mickey Rourke and Lisa Bonet told us.
Somewhere in Mexico. Maya's hiding in an alley outside of the jail. She finally decides to go inside. Once there, she announces that she's there to get her brother. The fine is 2500 pesos, but she only has fourteen American bucks. The cop is less than pleased with this amount. After some back and forth about America and her being sick and blah blah blah tired-plotline-cakes, Maya sees the wanted notice about them on the wall. She grabs it and announces that the people in question in the drawing are none other than she and her hermano. Once the cops grab her, it's clear that she's done this on purpose to bring on the agua negros from her eyes. The trick works and the waters start flowing.
Back in the cells, the boys hear Maya's grunts in the front room. They wonder what's going on, but when Stoner's eyes fill with black, Alejandro immediately knows his sister is there and calls out to her. She comes running. "You killed them..." her brother rasps at her. She shakes her head, and she'd cry, you know, if her eyes weren't filled with black goo. She says she couldn't leave him, and he says it's all going to be okay. Then he takes the blackness from her while they're still inside the damn building, even though, really, they should have run outside to do this so that they could have had a chance to get away and I'm really tired of giving away these free lessons in how to be a successful fugitive when the students in question are clearly NOT EVEN LISTENING. So, whatever, Alejandro takes on the black shit, the guards start stirring, and the twins go to run away, only Stoner wakes up too and tells them they should take him along because he has a car. They run outside, get into Stoner's Nissan, and drive off.
Luck o' the Irish Pub. Ricky opens up the box, revealing a large amount of cash. Everyone laughs at their good fortune. Everyone, that is, except for Will -- the guy Peter overheard earlier talking about how the money was his. Will pulls out a gun, points it at Ricky, and demands that he hand over all the pretty money. Peter enters and says, "So I was right." Will says, "Yeah, that you were! Congratulations, Peter!" And then he shoots him twice in the chest. Peter goes down. Caitlin starts to go to him, but Will stops her, reminding her that he has a gun and he'd like the money, please. Before Ricky can hand it over, however, Will goes flying through the air and slams up against the wall. The gun falls out of his hand. Peter stands up as everyone stares at him. While still holding Will up against the wall from a distance, Peter looks down at his chest as one of the bullets actually SHITS out of his chest. It's totally gross.
Everyone in the room is all, "What the fuck?" Peter moves toward Will with intention until the guy starts to appear as if he's being strangled. Caitlin screams Peter's name, and we see his face go from slightly evil to totally surprised that he's even doing this. He immediately drops Will to the ground, and the guy runs for the hills. Caitlin and Ricky look at Peter in awe and, possibly, a little fear.
1671. Hiro continues telling Ando his stupid story as Kensei and Yaeko canoodle under a distant cherry blossom tree. Hiro stuffs the sword hilt with his notes. Kensei walks over, and Hiro says he was worried that Kensei wouldn't come back, but he did, and now he can gather all the appropriate scrolls and get them to White Beard or whatever and now Hiro can safely leave, assured that his hero will be the Hero he knows he can be. Or something. But Kensei doesn't want him to go. He worries that he can't do this without Hiro. "Only you can keep me from my returning to my heathen ways," says Kensei. "You're like a conscience. If only I'd take heed of you." Heh.
Hiro says he almost broke history by coming to 1671 and if he stays, he runs the risk of doing more damage. "I don't know what to say, Carp," says Kensei. "You've done this grubby soul a great kindness. Thank you." Aw. They bow to each other, and Hiro hands the man his sword. Yaeko walks over and tells Hiro that he's been a great and true friend. They say their goodbyes, and Yaeko and Kensei walk off to the cherry blossom trees. Hiro looks after them as Kensei makes the blossoms rain down over his girl's head. Hiro starts to cry, but quickly turns and squeezes his eyes so he can leave. But he doesn't go anywhere. He tells Ando that he's sorry, but he can't come home yet, and then he runs over to be the third wheel to the bicycle that is his hero and his lady.
Sylar's Summer Camp of Contention. Sylar's sitting at a table, trying to make a coffee cup slide across into his hand. It's not moving. He's baffled as to why he doesn't have any powers. Maybe they all leaked out of him when he was stabbed? Candice brings him some eggs, but he's too busy bitching about his lack of powers to notice. Sylar ungratefully points out that he thought she was supposed to be taking care of him, and she's like, "Dude, are you breathing? Has your bleeding stopped? Yeah, that's what I thought. Sorry you can't make shit freeze anymore, but at least you're ALIVE." Unfortunately, Sylar's not terribly interested in being alive if he doesn't have powers, because without powers, he's just a skeevy nerd who works in his father's clock shop.
Candice assures him that once he's fully healed, The Company will make sure he reacquires his powers. I think Candice isn't totally clued-in as to how it is that Sylar actually ACQUIRES his powers, because she offers to help him in this venture. "You?" he sneers. "How're YOU gonna help? You gonna make me some more eggs?" He flings the plate at her. She tells him she's going to make it easy and fun for him because she can take him anywhere he wants to go: Paris, London, even Japan. She can also be anyone he wants her to be. She proceeds to cycle through several illusions, including a geisha, two Swedish twins, and even Sylar himself, which I'm not even sure WHY she includes that in her repertoire unless she thinks that Sylar likes the idea of fucking himself. I mean, we're all interested in fucking Sylar, but I seriously doubt HE is. Even he's not that creepy. Sylar stands up and moves toward her, smiling. He says she's extraordinary and moves to kiss her, but he smashes the coffee cup against her head instead. She falls to the ground, and he tells her that he's going to get his abilities back all right, only he's starting with stealing HERS.
Braaaaaaaaains.
After the break, we see Sylar's blood-soaked hand removing a piece of coffee cup from Candice's head. "So this is what you really look like," he says, stepping away from the body. Indeed, Candice's real body is, shall we say, slightly larger than the one she chose to represent herself with. It would seem that I guessed right last season when I wondered if Candice chose to appear as hot and lithesome because in reality she was kind of fat and ugly. Sylar continues to talk to her dead body about how it's silly to try to be something you're not, but Candice is dead, so she's not really listening.
Sylar then tries to go back to Maui with his newly acquired powers, but nothing happens. He tries for London, thinking it's a location issue. Nope. Japan. Again, nothing. He tries shouting Japan, but all that does is stress out his wounds and he doubles over in pain. He realizes that, even though he ate her braaaaaaaains, he doesn't actually have Candice's powers. This displeases him greatly, and he runs out of the building in an attempt to...run to Maui? Once outside, however, he realizes that he's in the middle of fucking nowhere and he has a greater chance of coming across the tail-end of a downed airplane than he does white sandy beaches and a nice mai tai.
Emerald Isle Pub. Caitlin, aside from being a damn fine barmaid, an excellent getaway driver, and quite good with a kick to the nuts, also appears to be earning an income as a tattoo artist in the evenings, because she's in the process of giving Peter his own "family crest" on his arm. And she's not doing it "prison style" with a sewing needle and some pen ink. Oh, no. She's doing it with an ACTUAL tattoo needle, because don't all Irish pubs have a tattoo parlor in the front window? Peter winces a bit as she marks him, and Caitlin quips, "Oh, wouldya quit bein' such a baby, pretty boy!" Peter sort of stops and looks at her like, "Really? You think I'm cute?" Yes, Peter. She thinks you're cute. We all do. Now take off your shirt. Ricky approaches with The Box and some whisky. He says that he may not know what Peter is, but he knows who Peter is, and that's family. And, since there are no secrets amongst family, Ricky hands him The Box.
Ricky gets up and goes to the back of the pub, and Caitlin says, "Well?" "Well, what?" responds Peter. Caitlin tells him his whole life is in that box, but Peter wonders if it's a life he doesn't want. When he had Will up against the wall, he could have killed him. Caitlin points out that he didn't, but Peter knows better; there was something evil inside him at that moment, and he's not sure he wants to know why. Caitlin tells him that she can tell he's a good soul. "What if I open this box and I find otherwise?" he says. She puts her hand on his and asks him if he likes where he is right now and if he likes who he is right now. He nods. "Well, then," she says, "maybe for now, just leave it be." She leans in, and they kiss. Yum! As they kiss, we see his new family crest morph into the "S" symbol and then disappear. I have no idea what that means, other than he can't maintain a tattoo because his skin would immediately heal and that maybe the "S" symbol is jealous of other skin art.
Freak Beach. West and Claire are sitting in the sand, discussing whose powers are cooler. Claire thinks West's are cooler because he can get away from his parents if they're annoying him. West thinks Claire's are cooler because she's indestructible. "You can skydive without a parachute!" he says. "You can skydive without a plane!" she fires back. They both laugh, because superpowers are funny. He thinks she could eat fire, just for fun, but she tells him that she feels pain; she just gets over it quickly. He asks what it would feel like if he pinched her ear, and then he does so, and she shrieks in pain and reaches out to do the same to him and then he leans in and kisses her and it's quite sweet.
It's sweet, that is, until Claire opens her eyes and sees two parallel hash marks on West's neck. She asks him what they are, and he shuts down for a moment before telling her that a couple of years ago, he was riding his bike to school, and the thing he knew, he was waking up in his bed. The last thing he remembered was a man stepping out of the bushes calling his name. Claire asks who the man was, but West doesn't know. He just remembers the way he looked at him, like he was an animal he wanted to trap. "I try to put him out of my head," says West, "but sometimes I still see his face. The man with the horn-rimmed glasses." Claire looks like she's about to vomit.
Superlab. Tobby says that he has another vial, and Mohinder says he'll get started on it right away, but his delivery suggests that his heart isn't in it. Tobby hands it to him as his cell rings. Tobby answers and goes to take the call outside. Mohinder immediately gets on his own cell phone and calls Bennet. Outside, Tobby asks the person on the other end of the line where they are, and Niki answers that she's in his office. "Are you sure you're gonna be able to cure me?" she asks. Tobby says they will, but they're going to want something from her in return. He doesn't tell her what that will be, and she doesn't ask.
Meanwhile, Mohinder tells Bennet that The Company is moving all of Isaac's paintings somewhere. Mohinder nervously starts to go through the paintings while telling Bennet that this was a terrible idea, because Tobby's watching his every move and he's in way over his head. Bennet tells him that as long as he's alive, he's going to make sure Mohinder's taken care of. Just then, Mohinder pulls out a canvas that has "8/8" painted in the bottom corner. So it's the last in the series of what I'm going to call the "ElderDeaths." He says to Bennet, "That's exactly the problem." Bennet asks what he's talking about, and Mo takes a picture of the painting and says that he's sending it to Bennet. The rest of the paintings have apparently been shipped somewhere.
Bennet turns to his computer and brings up a screen with eight slots on it, one of which has been filled with the painting of Kaito Nakamura's death. "Well, we know how it begins," says Bennet, looking at the Kaito painting in the first slot, "with the death of Kaito Nakamura. But how does it end?" "Not well, I'm afraid," says Mohinder as Bennet receives the image he sent. It's a painting of Bennet himself, lying in the foreground of the painting with a bullet hole in his left eye. In the background we can see Claire, kissing someone whose face we can't see. Bennet looks up and sees Claire outside his door. He immediately clears the screen and they look at each other. He nods at her and says goodnight with a smile. She looks at him without smiling and returns the goodnight, the expression on her face indiscernible. Bennet returns to looking at the painting that foretells his demise.
To be continued...
on Heroes: Who are the ElderHeroes? And when will they all diiiiiie?