On the downside, Arizona is hardly in the episode at all. Upside, that gives her less time to do horrible, awkward things that make Callie yell. Luckily, Callie still has Derek to yell at: She threatens a lawsuit if he doesn't give her back her interest in their sensors that he sold to the government. After a terrifically insightful read on his character -- essentially that, as a god, he has never answered to anyone before now, with the White House -- he agrees, and demonstrates his grace with a Post-It once again, sticking the word BULLIES with a line through it on the monitor to keep them both brave as they eventually win a standoff with that mean Skype man that always yells at him. Their research will continue, and the devices are no longer proprietary.
Richard's birthday begins the episode, as he arrives to the inexplicable dick move of Owen handing him a brochure about retirement and suggesting they lessen his surgical hours. When a formerly uninsured American comes in with strange pains, Internal Medicine is excited to find he has an absorbed twin, and Bailey gives Webber the surgery. It's nice because Bailey, Meredith and Richard are such a sweet little family, and also because he does the typical thing of overidentifying with the patient and deciding that if the guy wants to keep his fetus from inside his body in a jar, obviously he should do that.
The guy eventually rejects the curiosity once they get it out of him, hilariously, and a still-mopey Webber is urged to keep working by Catherine Avery before she adorably tricks him into his surprise party, where everybody shows him love and Owen explains his plan to put Richard in charge of the Residency program, because he is the greatest teacher of the whole hospital. If you're counting, that's several happy endings so far.
Ross brings a patient to Yang's study that is not qualified for her study, and both he and the patient spend the entire episode refusing to comprehend that fact, and it's fairly obnoxious. She has a baby, and probably she will die of her heart defect, which is a problem and very sad -- and, dumbly, why she got knocked up in the first place -- but what is not actually a problem is not getting into a study that you don't qualify for, even if you are played by the lovely and talented Keke Palmer. Luckily, Yang doesn't give a shit about this girl's problems either way, because she is Yang.
What Cristina does have time for is -- in preparation for her big Sliding Doors thing week -- trying to lock down an internet girlfriend for Owen, to square everything away. There's a touching scene where he describes his perfect girlfriend, who is Yang obviously, and at the end of the episode he asks her to hook up some more, so I guess he's going to swing for the fences one more time on that one. One thing women really like is when you ignore what they're explicitly telling you, over and over, because of your dumb romantic ideas that are more important than their personhood. Just ask Burke.
Stephanie meets a cute and funny scientist who is studying Meredith's printer, who makes Meredith very grumpy because Meredith is still trying to figure out the difference between "passive" and "aggressive" lately, when it comes to everybody on the show doing medical studies at the same time. Eventually, because of Webber's thing with the Dark Half guy, she realizes she's letting her printer love get dark and twisty down in the basement, and joins the two down there to make friends with the printer again.
Oh, and then another happy ending also: Jo throws one of her Oliver Twist fits about being "in the system" and how growing up "in the system" makes you afraid of signing documents -- even Love Contracts with Alex -- because then you are "in the system" and whatever, but then eventually she signs it and they make out, because a piece of paper does not stop either of them from being hot, which is really the important thing.
But my favorite part of the episode, weirdly, is the Kepner stuff. Catherine Avery comes after her ass hardcore with a post-nup, which April smartly redirects by seeing that Catherine's real problem is that Jackson cut her out of his wedding, which if you think about it is kind of a Doomsday scenario for that lady. (April works her ass so well, it's amazing how great her whole down-home "apologize to your mother" thing goes over. Not surprising, just a joy to watch.) But Catherine also goes after April on the thing that is both the worst and the best thing about her, her faith, and brings up a lot of questions about how their kids will be raised.
Of course it's obligatory with elopements that you have this "Are we in fact Dharma and Greg" kind of storyline, but it's a fresh trick on it because of the particulars: Kepner is a homeschooled lunatic from the prairie, and Avery is a boarding-school Richie Rich who started sitting in on Avery Foundation board meetings when he was fifteen. April is personally anti-choice, of course, while her husband and eventually children have to be agnostic about those matters because of what their family and foundation do. And will the kids be Christian or what? I like these questions, I like thinking about raising babies, and I like what the crux ends up pinned on: April's weird idea of how families work vs. Catherine's very weird idea of how families work.
And I hate to say it, but I also kind of like that it -- being the messiest problem, in real-life terms -- meant the only not-entirely-happy ending of the episode, which was so buoyant and comforting and un-Grey's in some ways that I fully expected a plane to crash through the restaurant at the end during Richard's birthday party, killing everybody, like usually happens. But instead, no. They get to be happy -- even Meredith and Callie got to be happy this week, which is rare this season -- and Richard is at this transitional place in his life, where the boundless exuberance of Catherine could either set him free or possibly drive him off a cliff, and that's a neat place to end on.
(I also liked how Catherine said, "Pretend to be surprised!" right before pushing him into the room, because it was cute and weird -- he would have been surprised -- but also cracked me up, because what if instead she had said, "Pretend to be shocked!")
Anyway, Lauren's back for the recap later in the week, but thank you for letting me talk about my favorite TV show for a minute. week is Cristina's big thing, which is beyond exciting. -- Jacob Clifton
First of all, a huge thanks to Al and Jacob for emergency subbing for me this week when I came down with the worst stomach flu I've had since I was a child. As I lay there getting my IV fluids and meds and generally being pathetic, I was totally eavesdropping on all of the nurses and I must say, their conversations were incredibly boring and only related to things like work or Girl Scout cookies. Does this mean that everything we've been sold on this show about the non-stop saucy, sex-at-work lives of doctors and nurses has been a LIE??
Richard arrives at work to lots of happy birthday wishes from Bailey, Arizona and Owen, though he figures Owen didn't remember and is just faking it because he heard the others say it. Owen then tells Richard he wants to talk later regarding Richard's surgical schedule. Owen seems nervous, but Richard knows Catherine is coming to town and assumes all of this is a cover for a surprise party, seemingly forgetting that Catherine might also have other business to attend to as well, namely, her son's elopement. But Owen tells Richard that he really does want to talk, and then hands over a package which contains a retirement proposal pamphlet. Richard's good birthday mood is immediately washed away, while Mere tells us that the toughest stage of childbirth is the "Transition Stage," where you're exhausted and been pushing forever with nothing to show for it yet.
Mere appears to have found her bioengineer, a cute young guy named Eric who helpfully exposits that he beat out 100 other engineers for the position. The only problem is that Mere doesn't actually want to let him get his hands on the printer and informs him that all he'll be doing to start is reading every word of their research thus far. She's so serious that he not touch her baby that she assigns Stephanie the boring task of watching him read while she continues to voiceover about the frustration of childbirth.
Because this season is All About Research, Cristina's conduit project is full steam ahead and Smash is interviewing prospective subjects -- or rather, their parents, since their test subjects will be children. Cristina is in another room only looking at scans of the kids' hearts because she wants to make a totally unbiased decision on who gets to participate without any messy outside factors like emotions or relationships getting in the way. Owen comes in to see how it's all going and she starts musing about finding him a new girlfriend and figures there must be some scientific way to find him the perfect mate, where she could just punch in a bunch of criteria and choose from the results to find him the ideal woman. It takes Owen to point out that she's describing online dating, and he assures her that he needs nothing of the sort.
Jackson and April are having a good-natured tiff about dirty dishes in the sink because, you know, they didn't know each others' dirty dishes habits before they ran off and got married. April immediately forgets that, though, when she looks across the way and sees a very unhappy Catherine glowering at them from across the room. The newlyweds both kind of freak out, but Jackson pulls himself together and lies that it will be fine as they go to face her. Catherine drawls, with no hint of amusement in her voice, "So, I understand congratulations are in order?" Jackson protectively puts his arm around his bride.
Bailey and Leah have a patient with pain in his abdomen, and are shocked when his wife tells them he's had this nagging discomfort for ten years now. While they do an ultrasound, he explains that he's a junk collector and that doesn't really come with benefits but he just finally signed up for insurance so thought he'd get it checked out. The docs find a mass and the wife freaks out that it's cancer, but Bailey makes and immediately tries to hide a delighted face and funny music starts to play so it's obvious this is not going to be some dark, terminal case. Bailey orders a CT but won't yet tell Leah what she thinks it might be.
Derek gets a page and finds Owen, Callie, and a woman introduced as Callie's attorney all waiting for him in the conference room. Callie's not going to quietly let Derek just take his sensors back and go home, so she spoke to Owen about her concerns and then lawyered up. Derek is, unsurprisingly for a man who rarely finds himself challenged and handles it ungracefully when he is, not happy about this development.
Bailey and Leah are doing the scan, and Leah still can't figure out why Bailey is wriggling around like an excited puppy until Bailey tells her to look closer. Whatever it is, Leah gasps, and then when Mere walks in she is shocked and immediately claims a spot on the surgery. Bailey tells her to hold her horses, because she's going to call Richard and invite him a birthday gift.
Smash sees what he thinks is his last candidate but a young pregnant girl rushes into the office and announces that her name is Cheryl, and she is what he is looking for: she has the same condition as Baby Nathan and has had at least one failed procedure to try and fix it. Smash carefully points out that they are looking for pediatric patients who are still growing. Despite her crack about the growth of her stomach of late, she doesn't fit the bill, but she persists and tells him she's due in six weeks and would like to actually survive to raise her baby.
Richard comes into the CT room and isn't sure of what to make of Bailey and the others looking like cats with canaries. Bailey tells him she's got a birthday surprise, and he grumbles while he puts on his glasses and takes a look at what seems to be a tiny skeleton. It turns out that their patient, Greg, absorbed his own twin in utero and that's what is now causing his pain. Richard's excitement now matches the ladies' since this is a once-in-a-lifetime kind of find; he exclaims, "Hot diggity!" as Bailey again wishes him happy birthday.
Alex has presented Jo with the "love contract" so that they can date without suspension but she finds it creepy and alarming and refuses to sign. Arizona walks by and mentions some crazy awesome groundbreaking pediatric procedure that she and Alex will be doing later; Alex tries to use that as bait to get Jo to sign but she holds firm.
Since Leah is still a resident, she's worse at her poker face than the older doctors when they explain the situation to Greg. While he tries to absorb (sorry) the news, they explain that it should be removed because the pain he's experiencing could be a sign that it will cause problems for him in the future. They tell him they've scheduled surgery, but Greg finally finds his voice and yells at them to stop calling the mass "it" because that's his brother. His wife is suitably horrified by his excitement.
While Cheryl is begging Smash to just call Cristina and ask her if she'll make an exception, of course her water breaks. Through a contraction she tells Smash she doesn't have anyone for him to call because her parents don't talk to her and she's not sure of the identity of the baby's father. She's persistent and again tells him to call Cristina and ask her to bend the rules.
Smash goes to Cristina to ask her about Cheryl, but Cristina of course holds firm that Cheryl is too old and they can't risk skewing the results of their trial. She reminds Smash that this is why she was only looking at the hearts in the first place -- so she wouldn't be emotionally influenced. She reminds him and explains to us that the trial is for kids 1-12 only. Owen then calls her and she switches gears to tell him that she thinks internet dating might be just the thing for him.
Derek is in a heated argument with Callie about the sensors; he points out that he signed a contract while she counters that the sensors were both of theirs so he had no right to sign them away on his own. He's also surprised that she's challenging him since just the day before they had a playdate for Sofia and Zola and she didn't mention any of these concerns. Callie won't be derailed by mention of their adorable children, and reminds Derek that the sensors were developed for research that she started and invited him to participate in. The then says that if he impairs her access, he will be prosecuted, and her lawyer looks on proudly at her businesslike delivery of the threat. Owen suggests taking it to the board first to see if they can figure out a solution that doesn't involve turning this show into an episode of Law & Order and tells Derek to leave the sensors alone until he hears back from Owen.
In another conference room, Catherine is sitting across from the newlyweds while April gives a long, pleading apology. Jackson cuts her off and tells his mom that he knows why she's there and she didn't need to come, since he's already called their family attorney. It turns out that Catherine is there because she's worried about the financial interests of the Avery family. April is appalled that Catherine would think she's after money but Catherine smoothly counters that she left a man at the alter to run off and marry another, so she's not sure of what April or even Jackson are capable. Since they didn't sign a pre-nup, she had a post-nuptial agreement drawn up for them to sign instead. Jackson is livid, and shoves the paperwork back at her, while April can only gape in shock before following Jackson out the door.
Outside, she tells Jackson she wants to just sign and be done with it but Jackson tells her that he doesn't want that and the point is actually that this was a conversation for the two of them to have on their own, rather than on Catherine's terms. April, however, points out that they are all family now and she thinks offering an olive branch wouldn't be the worst idea. Jackson eventually agrees and acknowledges that April is a better person than either Avery, but won't let April go back immediately since he wants to let Catherine stew in her own juices for a little while.
Leah shows the freaky absorbed twin scans to Stephanie, and can't help but gloat that she gets to handle an uber-rare medical oddity while Steph gets to babysit. They offer to let Eric take a look and he first declines, but then decides he wants to see. He's completely grossed out, and then argues that he can read without supervision thankyouverymuch. His statement would have been more believable if Stephanie hadn't caught him doodling in the margins of the reports. Leah leaves, and Steph starts to quiz him on what he was supposed to be reading.
A line has formed outside Greg's room that could rival any good St. Patrick's Day crowd at an Irish pub. Inside, Richard presents the case to a new flock of interns. Owen walks in like the resident barfly allowed to cut the line but after that retirement suggestion, Richard's not feeling like giving Owen any kind of freebie and makes him go wait like everybody else. Greg is handling it all well but after hearing repeatedly how rare and special a case this is, he declares that they aren't going to take baby brother out after all. His wife and the doctors are all horrified, but he insists that he's not going to sign the consent form.
At lunch, Mere is complaining to Cristina about her life until Cristina points out that Mere is working on an amazing case and, to prove her point, she tries to weasel her way onto the team herself. Alex comes over and does the same, but both he and Cristina are shot down. Mere just can't get over her nervousness at leaving the new kid alone with the printer, comparing it to leaving your kids with a babysitter who could wind up partying like a teenage Meredith would surely have done if someone were ever crazy enough to leave her alone with their children. Cristina is browsing dating profiles, trying to find a match for Owen, and ignores Alex's suggestion that she and Owen just go back to hooking up. He then tells a surprised Mere that Jo won't sign the contract and warns that if this spooks her away, he's blaming Mere completely. He leaves as Callie and Arizona walk up, and Callie gripes about Derek even though she's supposed to be keeping quiet about the situation for now. Lunch is finally broken up when Mere gets a page and runs off in a panic.
She finds Richard erasing their procedure from the surgery board and Bailey yelling at him that he's ruined everything. They both offer suggestions of what Richard could say to fix the situation and he shoots them all down but promises that he'll fix it since he was the one to mess it all up in the first place. He then gripes that this has turned into the worst birthday ever.
Smash goes to Cheryl and lies that Cristina didn't give him an answer yet but now that he's back to being his normal, sweet, kinda meek self instead of a sleep-deprived power-hungry monster, he's also a bad liar and she sees right through him. She grimaces through a contraction while she explains that doctors told her she'd be dead by 15 so she dropped out of school to hitchhike and have sex. She obviously lived past 15 and wound up in her current situation, and now she's quite interested in living. She begs Smash to talk while he coaches her to breathe.
Jo is bitterly helping a non-pediatric patient when Alex comes in with the contract and reminds her that she could be in on this groundbreaking surgery if she would just sign. He adds that he thought it was crazy at first too but then realized it was just a piece of paper. But she's convinced that every time someone signs a document things go wrong, like romance fizzling once a couple gets married or this poor lady they are talking over, who signed a DNR and is now actually using it. You know, which is actually THE WHOLE PURPOSE of a DNR so it makes no real sense for her argument but, but whatever. She connects signing something to doom and gloom. One could also point out that if she doesn't sign, they are going to have to either actually break up, start lying about their relationship again which will surely end in tears, or keep outright breaking the rules and getting suspended/taken off of choice rotations – so really, not signing the paper has as much doom and gloom attached as signing it does. Arizona comes in and gets Alex for the surgery, so he snaps the offending contract back out of Jo's hands and leaves her and her principles to change colostomy bags.
Back at the Sensor Standoff, Callie holds firm that, "The sensors were an answer to a question I asked you." Of course Derek counters that they were HIS answer, and he's really in full-on I'm Brilliant Derek Shepherd so Shut the Fuck Up mode. Finally, though, he plays his ace – if she fights him in court, she won't win anyway because his is the only name on all of the materials and patents. She's as pissed as she has every right to be, and Derek apologizes and tells her he feels terrible. She spits back that the reason he feels terrible is that he's doing the wrong thing and he knows it. She then yells that he never had to answer to anyone before but now he has to answer to the President and he's afraid to say no even when he knows he's wrong. Another ten million points to Callie! Derek just pouts in response.
Cristina calls Owen down to her lab but while it's good that she's narrowed down her heart candidates, she actually just wants to nag him about his online dating profile. He's incredibly reluctant to play along so she finally sits down to set up his profile herself. After much goading, he finally starts describing someone who is very obviously Cristina: someone who doesn't like to cook or even get out of bed on a day off, who sleeps super soundly, who has known suffering, and who just knows and understands him without wanting to change him. He adds that he's pretty sure there's only one of this girl, and then he leaves. Cristina just sits, with a kind of defeated air about her.
April and Jackson suck it up and go back to see Catherine, and when they walk in April tells her that she'll be happy to sign the paperwork. But har har, she's just a country girl who doesn't get it and Jackson explains that she should have her lawyer review it first and then they can discuss with the Avery family lawyer and get it all worked out and THEN she'll sign. April is a bit overwhelmed but tries to hide it and replies that she'll find herself one. This is a little bit ridiculous because Jackson would know full well that April doesn't have a personal attorney already on hand but we're supposed to really start seeing their differences now that they are hitched. To that point, Catherine then asks then if they want to have kids, and both Jackson and April seem surprised but pleased to hear the other say yes. Catherine then gets her Catherine on and immediately asks in what religion the kids will be raised. This is important because all Avery children are on the board of the family Foundation, and start sitting in on meetings at the tender age of 15 and voting at 18. Catherine confirms that April is pro-life and then starts firing questions at her about if her unborn children will vote to stop funding institutions that perform or even provide information on abortions, or support stem cell research. April defends that she may be a Christian but that she doesn't judge others on their beliefs or choices, but Catherine is on a roll. While Jackson grows angrier and April grows more befuddled, Catherine launches into her finale: that it would be great if this was all just about a mother-in-law who is pissed off because she wasn't at the wedding, but it's really about this massive institution that she helped build and what will happen to it in the future when their children take over. "And I don't get the impression that either of you have given a moment's thought to what that means." And by the looks on both of their faces, she's not wrong.
It's standing room only in the OR for Greg's surgery, but Stephanie manages to get through to the operating table to beg Mere to let Eric just use the dang printer, already. She's frustrated that she's not actually participating in this surgery because she has to babysit him, but Mere won't budge. The doctors are pulling out a lung here, a tooth there, a spinal column… it's all rather disgusting sounding but they are like little kids on Christmas morning. Bailey and Leah are horrified when they learn that the way Richard talked Greg back into this was to promise him a "doggie bag," as Mere puts it, but Richard insists that this is a part of Greg and he should have be able to have it. He then gives a nice little speech about how you shouldn't hide things of medical interest, but instead should share your knowledge because you might change the face of medicine.
Jackson absolutely loses his mind at Catherine, reminding her that while the marriage was sudden, the relationship is not a new one and she's just mad because she was left out. They start yelling at each other about how she butts in to everything in his life until April hollers at them to shut up. She tells Catherine that they obviously have lots to figure out but that they will do that, and that she will be happy to talk to Catherine about her beliefs sometime because she wants Catherine to know that she's not judging anyone else on their beliefs, either. Ultimately, she assures Catherine that they will figure it out, and she knows that they did something irresponsible and rash but they did it because they love each other. She then apologizes, and while Jackson quickly tells her she doesn't have to do that, April counters that she does because they did leave Catherine out and if their kids did that one day April would kill them. At this, Catherine rolls her eyes but in that way that says that some little part of this valid and she might be starting to melt just a teeny bit. April continues that they made a huge mess and hurt their significant others as well as Catherine and their families, and reiterates that they are sorry and she's going to spend however long it takes trying to make up for it. Jackson has regressed to an angry teenager and won't even look at his mom until April nudges him to go to her and say he's sorry. Catherine demands to know what he was thinking and Jackson very sweetly tells his mom how much he loves his wife. She finally breaks, and cries sadly that he could have had his grandma's cake topper. "It's Limoges!" Oh, how I love her. They make up, she gives him a light slap, and April looks on, happy that she managed to get them back together but clearly disturbed by the larger picture of the conversation.
Cheryl has hit the moment of "transition" that Mere was telling us about before, and she cries that she can't do it anymore and begs Smash to call her mom and tell her she is sorry. The doctor seems to agree that Cheryl can't do it and tells a nurse to get ready for a c-section, but Smash goes and takes Cheryl's hand and coaches her along until she makes one final push and the baby is born.
Derek and Callie together give Lloyd a call, who moans that he still can't see then because of camera issues. I get the impression from his expression, which ranges from "constipated" to "annoyed" with a number of flavors in between, that he forgot that they can still see him. Derek introduces Callie, who gives a cheery hello, and then announces that it's not going to work for him to keep the sensors proprietary. Lloyd takes that moment to point out that there are a ton of NIH and White House folks in his office, and he sends the camera around and introduces them all. Callie starts to look worried, but Derek puts up a Post-It -- his chosen medium for all important life declarations -- with the word "bullies" crossed out right to the screen to keep them on track. It appears that Callie finally got through that luscious hair and struck a chord with Derek, and he announces to the group that basically, he doesn't believe in keeping the sensors proprietary because that would thwart medical innovation and he can't support that kind of oppression. Over Lloyd's protests that he already signed a very clear contract, Derek says that they need to share the sensors or he's going to walk off the project. (Can he do that if he's already signed the contract? Well, he's Derek, so he can do anything, right?) When Lloyd tells him that he has to keep the sensors to himself or he's out, Derek actually replies that he's out. Callie had been dancing with glee in her chair, encouraging him, but when she hears that she gets momentarily freaked out, though she's still obviously proud of him. Derek goes on that he's happy to tell the President himself and Callie just keeps looking from him to Lloyd's constipated face like she's watching an exciting tennis match. Lloyd finally caves and stutters that they'll have to figure out a way to share the sensors, then. Derek and Callie literally jump out of their chairs for a victory hug, and then Callie does a happy dance which includes lots of victorious, taunting pointing.
Once Greg is back in his room, the doctors visit him and he excitedly asks to see his twin-in-a-jar. Leah holds up what is actually an opaque plastic bucket, and while his wife looks on warily Greg opens it up… and then starts screaming, horrified, for them to take it away. He remembers his manners and thanks them, but insists they get it away immediately, much to his wife's relief.
Out in the hall, Bailey cracks up to learn that Richard is keeping the twin bits as a birthday present to himself. He then makes a comment about a surprise party but Bailey tells him awkwardly that they really don't have a plan, but he's welcome to come to dinner with her and Ben! She gets pretty into this idea but Richard saves face and fibs that he was just joking, telling her to have fun.
Mere walks into her lab and totally busts Eric and Stephanie, who are actually using the printer. Stephanie thinks Mere should check out Eric's work but she won't listen and instead gives a speech about how she's continuing her mother's research so this project is like her baby, and she's failed it. He is very confused and points out that this isn't true but she cuts him off to continue her woeful speech about how other people's babies are thriving and saving lives while hers is sitting in the basement. "We need to change that." Stephanie and Eric both immediately notice that she actually used the word "we," and she orders Eric to sit down and listen while she goes over some important points before they start printing again. Stephanie is grinning because she'll be able to do actual work once again and now she's also going to be working with a cute young dude who I would assume is outside of the hospital dating policy…? Well, regardless, it's not like any of them are following it that closely anyway.
Cheryl is holding her baby, and trying to guilt Smash into going back to Christina again. But he knows better, and he points out that she can go on the transplant list and maybe she can make it into another trial instead. In that special way of teenagers she pouts that she wants this one, but Smash apologizes and maintains that she doesn't meet the criteria. He then suggests she call her own mom, figuring she's worried about her daughter. That seems to make Cheryl think a little while she cries.
Richard's got a date with his lady for his birthday, and while they walk to the restaurant Catherine admits that he's really proud that Jackson had the "stones" to stand up for true love, but she'd never actually admit that to him. Richard is all grumbly and she assumes it's that he doesn't have a party, but he says that it's actually because of Owen trying to push him into retirement. Catherine is horrified at the idea, not least because she was looking forward to starting a new phase of life with Richard and she doesn't want to do it with some layabout. She tells him that if he's truly not up for it, he should step aside, but if he is… he cuts her off with a kiss, and she then leads him inside and tells him as she opens the door to act surprised. He's confused for only a second and then acts appropriately surprised and genuinely delighted to see everyone gathered for his birthday after all, even the residents.
After Richard goes in and says his hellos, Derek and Callie both run in and thoroughly confuse their wives by saying that there's no need to form a committee about the sensors, because they overthrew the government today! The takeaway is that things are fine between the two of them, which has to be a relief for all involved.
Cristina sees Smash at the bar and asks him genuinely how he's doing; fortunately, he seems to be okay after strapping on his big boy pants and doing the right thing. Cristina then turns to Owen to tell him how popular his profile is on the dating site. She tells him that she narrowed down his choices for him, and he just has to pick three ladies for coffee dates. Owen tells her he has to go talk to Richard first, and then he wants to just go home and hook up with her. She for some reason seems shocked about this, but appears to warm to the idea.
Alex walks up to Jo, gives her a kiss, and then points out that he doesn't want to get busted for that so she should just sign the stupid contract because it really is just a piece of paper. He tells her that it's not a promise but that he can give her one if she wants it: his promise is that there is no promise of anything because they could both die tomorrow but if she signs the paper at least they can kiss when they want to in public. It's not super romantic but it does the trick, and she signs and then plants a huge one on him.
After Richard and Catherine say hello to Jackson and April, they leave and April tells Jackson that she knows full well that she wants to raise her children in her Christian faith, and she thought that he knew how important that was to her. Dude, a stranger walking down the street would know that, it's so not a surprise, but I guess we're acting like some of this stuff is new after all -- it's a little bit maddening because this is a pretty good, realistic, and interesting storyline but this particular point is one that should not be a surprise to ANYONE. Jackson, though, is a little bit uncomfortable raising his children with beliefs different from his own. April then brings up the board meetings at 15; she thought that the kids would be raising farm animals in 4H at that point. Jackson counters that the kids will have horses at boarding school… at which point April physically recoils at the idea of sending the kids away to school. Mere tells us that transition is movement from one part of life to a new one, and it can be a long, scary, dark tunnel.
Owen sits down with Richard and reminds him about their requested talk. Richard is insulted that Owen wants to talk about this at his birthday party but before he can work up too much steam Owen cuts in and tells him that he wants to appoint Richard director of the residency program, in charge of all of the educational decisions of the hospital. Owen tells him that he's a great teacher who has a special touch with the kids, and he hopes that Richard will consider it.
As if on cue, Leah jumps out of her seat to make a toast, and all of the other residents pop up too and claim they want a turn. Smash is the actual smart one who just starts talking, and sweetly says that he wouldn't be there if not for Richard so thank you and happy birthday. Richard sincerely thanks him, and after taking a sip of water from his wine glass tells Owen that he'll think about the offer. Mere tells us that you have to come out the other side of that dark tunnel, because what's out there might actually be awesome.
Lauren S is a writer who lives and works in Atlanta and will never, ever be tempted to start a museum of medical oddities. She wants everyone to know: "The views expressed in my recaps and anything else I might write on TWoP are my own and do not necessarily reflect the views of my employer."