So Cristina and Smash are totally doing it now and the last of Smash's charming nervousness is completely washed away. It's time to finally perform baby Nathan's surgery and Cristina is blindsided the morning of the procedure by the news that so many other doctors wanted to see it, the hospital wants to live-stream the whole thing and Smash set it all up with Owen without asking her. Nathan's parents and Cristina are all against it, but it winds up happening anyway, at least until the procedure takes a bad turn and Cristina orders it turned off. At the same time that she is trying to save Nathan's life, Mere and Stephanie are implanting their first portal vein into a sheep. Everyone is far less excited about that one, but it goes flawlessly. When Smash and Mere wind up in the elevator together afterward, she tries to talk to him and he snaps that she won and is generally a complete jerk and runs away even when she tries to order him back to yell at him. Hours later, things have taken a turn for both patients and baby Nathan seems to be stabilizing and healing while the poor sheep dies. Cristina and Mere then find themselves alone together and at first they are stilted with each other, but manage to kinda sorta get along. That is, until Mere asks what's up with Smash's attitude and the whole conversation devolves into yet another fight with both of them taking everything too personally.
James Remar shows up at the hospital again, this time in withdrawal and begging for Princess' help. She tries to send him away, but Owen reminds her that she's a doctor and this is her job and right after that, James collapses in a seizure so she has to start caring for him. Alex is super-pissed and tries to kick him out, but Princess parrots Owen's words about being a doctor, and then she hangs out with James as he starts going through horrific withdrawal hallucinations. Most of these have to do with Alex and are pretty horrible. Finally, in one particularly bad moment, he pins her to the wall and Alex is fortunately there to pull him off and shackle him to the bed. Later, however, he sees Princess still in there, sleeping in a chair and being a good person and all that.
Bailey is dying to get back to work, but she's still finger-pulling and now she's got a doctor from psych shadowing her and catching every tug. She's the only one who can clear Bailey for surgery, and Bailey finally begs her to find out what she'll have to do to operate again. They make a deal for Bailey to complete five sutures, but to do so with her instruments in disarray, without any rearranging or counting or redoing or finger fiddling or anything else like that. When she struggles, the doc implores her to consider taking OCD medicine that will help her get herself under control, but Bailey is adamant that she doesn't need it. Richard has finally been released by the hospital, but after a while he comes back to get in some practice in the skills lab and so he sees Bailey's struggle as she tries and fails to do the sutures cleanly. Finally, he has a talk with her where he tries to absolve her guilt for calling him a drunk, but she can't seem to forgive herself. He points out that she wasn't wrong, as he is an alcoholic, which is a disease and that he got it under control only when he accepted help. This finally seems to convince Bailey to at least try out the medication.
Callie and Derek have implanted sensors into a new test patient, but things aren't looking good when the woman can't move her artificial fingers and instead keeps yelling at her poor devoted husband. Once he leaves the room, she cries about how she just wanted to finally do something for him, but that she can't seem to stop taking out all of her frustration on him. Funny how that's kind of like what's going on with Callie and Arizona, who can't seem to stop fighting. Derek finally has an idea and gets their patient to move her fingers by finally not thinking about the movement, and thinking instead about showing her husband how much she loves him by reaching for his hand. Callie learns from this and realizes that she and Arizona have been doing too much talking and need to maybe go back to some touching instead to start getting along once again. That night, it looks like they are going to try just that.
April's sisters have arrived in town for her wedding, and after brunch with her and Matthew they have plans to throw her a bridal shower. Their nickname for April is "Ducky" since she was their ugly duckling little sister and it's driving April crazy that they still use it. Jackson shows up at the restaurant and then April leaves to show her sisters the hospital, which conveniently leaves Matthew and Jackson together to walk down the street and act uncomfortable. They witness a dude getting dragged down the street by a taxi and while Jackson is shooing away onlookers, Matthew clears the guy's windpipe with a pocketknife and a straw. When they get the dude to the hospital, Jackson yells at Matthew for being too hasty and doing a sloppy job and that all happens in front of April, who yells at Matthew, too. Later in surgery, Jackson tells April he was wrong, that Matthew did the right thing and convinces her to go spend the day with her family. But it turns out that he did that to save her impression of her fiancée -- when he runs into Matthew later and Matthew demands an apology, Jackson admits that he did actually have to spend hours fixing his crappy job. They both insult each other and Jackson accuses Matthew of trying to show off and be a hero, but then calm down and lie that they are fine with each other. When Jackson admits he won't be at the wedding, Matthew even goes so far to say she knows that it means a lot to April, so he should reconsider.
Out of surgery, April attends her bridal shower where her sisters continue to drive her crazy until she snaps and points out that she's turned into a gorgeous woman and an awesome surgeon. She then fires them as bridesmaids, and recruits a stunned Mere, Cristina and Arizona to stand up with her instead. Surely, nothing is going to go wrong with this plan at all week, right?
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Mere lets us in on a secret: all doctors are competitive science nerds. This is… a secret? I would hope they were, given that they dedicated their life to science. Callie and Derek are working on an actual model of an arm and hand that is picking things up, and they hook up their test subject to the machine so that she can move it herself. The woman, Becca, comments drily that when they do this she feels like the Bride of Frankenstein -- understandable as they are hooking cords up to big plugs set in her head.
Mere tells us that doctors compete because they all want to be the one who actually changes the face of medicine. Mere and Stephanie are trying to do so by… shearing a sheep. Actually, the sheep is their first test subject to receive a 3D-printed portal vein. Stephanie herself exclaims happily that they are changing the face of medicine. Or giving the face a shave, at least.
Meanwhile, Cristina apparently decided to do right by her patients and focus her mind on her work and off of her sexual frustrations by sleeping with her resident. She and Smash are giggly and post-coital in an on-call room and he convinces her they have time to go again before their conduit finishes printing.
Arizona and Callie meet up in the hall and both are cheerful but still tense with each other as they catch up on their days. Arizona asks if Callie is going to make it to April's shower, and Callie totally forgot and seems less than excited about it. Her mood isn't helped when Arizona reminds her that April is their friend, and she promises to be there if she can. Which I interpret as her surely finding something else to do during that time.
They walk past Princess, Stephanie and Leah, who greets them both, sporting a rather shellacked, poofy updo that would better suit someone twenty years older about twenty years ago. Leah's proud that she managed to sound professional but admits when asked that she's still dying inside. Smash runs up and tells them there are two seats left in the gallery, and Leah and Princess claim them immediately. Stephanie is insulted that they want to watch Cristina and Smash's surgery and not her own, but they just can't muster up excitement for a sheep.
Owen walks up to Mere and tells her it's a big day, but even he doesn't care about the poor sheep -- he was talking about Cristina's surgery on baby Nathan and forgot about Mere's surgery altogether. She's irked, but before she can give him crap Richard is wheeled out, finally having been discharged. He's embarrassed but pleased to see that everyone gathered to say goodbye, even though he points out that he's not going far and he will, in fact, be back to work. Bailey says, incredibly stilted, that he got himself better, but Richard replies that she's the one who got him better. He's wheeled into the elevator, and as the door closes Bailey starts pulling on her fingers. A psychiatrist, Dr. Alma (played by Illeana Douglas) appears to have been assigned to shadow Bailey and asks her if Richard leaving is stressful for her. Bailey snaps that it's not, but Alma replies by asking why, then, is she counting her fingers?
Owen and Smash are telling Nathan's very leery parents about how they are going to be filming the surgery, but Nathan's identity will remain strictly confidential. Cristina and Alex arrive, and when they hear about the proposed livestreaming of this surgery, it's clearly news to them. Cristina assures the parents that her only focus will be on their son and nothing else, and finally Dad gives a bit of a nod. The doctors all then go out to the hall, where a pissed off Cristina wants to know why she's just hearing about this. Owen is just as surprised, since Smash made a sharky move and told him that Cristina was on board. Smash exclaims that everyone in the hospital plus docs at Baylor and UCLA (woo!) wanted to watch, and he figured Cristina didn't need to bother with silly details such as these, so he went ahead and made some "executive decisions." Guess all of that self-doubt and distress from Heather's death is fully washed off, then. Alex is so not on board but Owen ignores Smash's obvious overstepping of boundaries and points out that they are a teaching hospital, so they should be doing this kind of thing. Cristina asks what will happen if something goes wrong, but Owen points out that would still be a learning opportunity for anyone watching. Finally, Cristina gives in though she's not happy about it. Smash, however, wriggles with glee.
Callie is also excited as she can't wait to see Becca wiggle her robotic fingers. But once they get ready and tell her to go, Becca can't seem to get it working. Her husband John, who seems positive and supportive, tells her to try and relax but she just snaps at him. The dreary soundtrack tells us that this movement probably isn't going to happen, at least in this scene. John tells her he won't distract her and heads off to grab some food; when he asks if she wants anything she snaps at him again. Callie seems worried, but Derek stays calm and gently tells Becca just to focus on what she's doing.
Owen and Princess are talking with James, and as they go over his treatment options James declares that he doesn't want to use methadone, he wants to get truly and totally clean. Owen is hesitant, but ultimately agrees to it and tells Princess to watch him. They go to the foot of his bed where surely he can't hear them as Princess tries to dump him off in a rehab facility, admitting to Owen that this is Alex's dad and it's a bad situation. Owen, for some reason, doesn't care and actually expects Princess to act professional and like the doctor she is and just take care of her patient.
Once Hunt is outside Bailey runs up to him and tells him she's had Alma following her for two days and she is totally fine and needs no more help and should be cleared for surgery. Alma just points out in response that she's pulling her fingers while she puts on this desperate show, and Bailey barks at her to go away, which of course she doesn't. Owen tells her she's only going to be cleared when Alma says she's ready, and then he goes. Bailey then turns to Alma and asks her what hoop she needs to jump through so she can just get back to caring for her patients.
April gives her sisters a tour of the ER, and wraps up by introducing them to Arizona. They fall all over themselves with excitement to meet her, and then one of them tells her emotionally that she has a cat who lost a leg, and when she sees the kitty hopping around she thinks that's "real strength." These three are all utter airheads and while we did get three names, we're never told which one is which, so I'll just refer to them collectively as The Nitwits. April is mortified and begs them to stop talking, while Arizona graciously takes her leave, promising that she'll make it to the shower the day. Just as April is about to get dressed and head out when her two men bring in Long Hair and Jackson spits out the story of Matthew's handiwork with not a little bit of disdain, especially since he's going to have to fix it all in surgery. The boys bicker but before they can just unzip their trousers and get to measuring, April says it doesn't matter, and tasks Matthew with taking The Nitwits home.
Princess finds Alex and despite his saying he doesn't want whatever bad news she's got, she announces that his dad is there. Alex wants her to kick him out and when she won't, just declares that he'll do it himself. He storms into James' room and yells at him to get up, and is surprised when James asks, "Hey son, how you doing?"
Alex doesn't waste any time and begins unhooking all of the wires attached to James' chest, while James tries to explain what we picked up a few weeks before -- that James didn't recognize Alex until he was angrily standing over him. James claims he's been trying to get clean since that day, but Alex is unmoved. Princess tries to stop him and finally manages to get through and point out that Alex doesn't have to treat James but she's going to because she's a doctor. She remembered! She tells Alex to go, and that she'll be fine.
Becca has allowed John back in the room, and he's feeding her while Callie and Derek try to figure out what's wrong. The sensors are all checking out fine, so they know the problem lies with Becca. Callie points out that Becca's a negative person and each day has been a fight -- hmm, methinks there's a wee bit of pot-kettling going on here too. Derek looks at it a different way, which is that Becca is still showing up every day but trying. He wonders if he is somehow not saying the right thing, and basically all of them are dejected that this isn't working.
Bailey and Alma wind up in the skills lab, where Bailey snidely says that it might surprise Alma to learn she's good at sutures. Alma doesn't bite and just points out that wouldn't surprise her at all, but she would be pretty astonished if Bailey could do five sutures without any of her OCD behaviors. She makes a deal with Bailey that if she can do that, she'll be cleared for surgery. Bailey snaps on her gloves, thinking this is going to be easy, until Alma reaches over and messed up all the carefully ordered trays of tools. Bailey's face falls as if Alma just grabbed a shotgun and aimed at her dog. She is to use only the tools to her right, and if she touches any of the others, touches her fingers, double-checks a stitch or otherwise rearranges anything, she has to start over. Alma then tells her she's free to start, and Bailey takes a deep breath, completely shaken.
In the OR, April gets mad at Jackson for yelling at Matthew in front of her sisters, who now will think she's engaged to a "nitwit." I find it interesting that her sisters would figure they are in a place to judge nitwittery, but I think that only adds to their "charm." When Jackson calls her "Ducky" she snaps and explains that the nickname stemmed from her being their ugly duckling little sister who had braces and pimples (if they are judging based on that, then I am also a Ducky along with, conservatively, 80% of all girls who have ever endured puberty) and they still see her like an idiot who can't do anything right. Jackson softens, and tells her that Matthew actually did the right thing after all, that he himself would have done the same, so she should go and spread the word. He convinces her the surgery will be an easy fix so she can go; she tries to stay to avoid her family but Jackson points out that they came all this way to see her, so off she goes.
It's then time for both of the 3D-printed, cell-seeded implant surgeries. Stephanie sets up a camera and Mere has to try to calm her down to come and help. Steph mentions, a couple of times, that they are changing the face of medicine so Mere finally points out that those who are doing that just get to work and don't actually say that about themselves. They get to work with the anesthesiologist and vet overseeing.
By contrast, the other OR and its gallery are packed full of people, and Baylor has just joined them via livestream. Cristina tells the camera what she's doing and Alex gives background on the patient until Smash arrives with the conduit. She starts the implantation and notes that the conduit is a little smaller than anticipated, so she has to do some sort of patch. In the other OR, Steph does a victory dance when their own procedure seems to go flawlessly.
Arizona goes to Cristina's gallery and sits down to Callie; she's in a great mood but Callie is glum after the morning with Becca and the two struggle to talk to each other normally. Arizona finally tells Callie to cheer up, Callie wants to know why she should, Arizona was just trying to say something, Callie knows and got offended anyway… finally, Callie gives up and leaves. From a few seats away Leah has been watching this whole exchange rather than the groundbreaking surgery down below, and seems hopeful that maybe the women will break up. Princess realizes what's going on and physically turns her back to the OR, where alarms are starting to ring.
In their quiet, empty OR, Mere excitedly tells the camera about what she just achieved, and adds that Steph and the vet will continue to monitor the sheep but so far things look good. In the neighboring OR, everything is still completely opposite and they have to pull out the paddles to shock Nathan's heart. Cristina looks up and orders Smash to turn off the camera, which fortunately he actually does.
Nathan made it out of surgery alive, but he's not doing great and his parents are mighty angry that they still aren't allowed to hold their son. Smash sounds almost frustrated with them as he tells them Nathan isn't stable enough, as if they should totally just take that and understand. They regret the surgery and say they should have listened to Alex, but Alex just tells them halfheartedly that it's early yet and the surgery could still be a success. Unsurprisingly with that bland delivery, Dad doesn't really buy what Alex is trying to sell. Cristina calmly tells them to take it one step at a time, and for now he'll be on the oscillator to force oxygen into his lungs and if that works, they can then move him to a normal ventilator.
Outside, Cristina gives Alex grief for not acting more supportive, but he tells her he's got a lot on his mind. Cristina isn't actually in the mood to hold it over him and instead asks him if he honestly thinks that the surgery is going to be a success. Alex tells her honestly that he doesn't know, but he hopes so. It's quick, but it's a really nice, actually sincere moment between the two.
James, meanwhile, is doing horribly and starts yelling for Alex, which then turns into him yelling at, presumably, Alex's mom about how she's raising the boy. Princess tries to get through to him and tells him that his detox is causing hallucinations, but it doesn't seem to work and James just yells at her as if she's his ex. Finally, he seems to break through and calm down, while she contemplates how she's getting a front row seat to see just how angry and terrible a father he was to Alex.
Mere gets on the elevator and finds Smash there, sulking. She asks him how it's going in a totally, "This is a socially acceptable way to greet someone even if you don't care and don't really want an answer," sort of way. Smash replies with a condescending, "Don't be smug." I'll take, "Things you never say to a superior at work" for $500, Alex. Man, you overcompensate to try to outrun your guilt over feeling responsible for your co-worker's death and then sleep with an Attending, and suddenly you own the place. Mere is shocked and appalled, but Smash just goes on, "You won, we lost, I get it." Mere finally picks her jaw up off the floor to tell him he doesn't get to talk to her like that, but he just exits the elevator with a final, "Congrats." She yells after him to come back for a verbal smackdown, but he just walks off.
I guess at some point we had a nighttime and it's now the day, because April's sisters show back up at the hospital with party supplies for the shower, which sounds as if it is imminent. Arizona warns them that April was called into a surgery so she's not sure if and when she'll be available. The Nitwits can't and won't accept this, and ask Arizona why anyone would choose a profession with such an unpredictable schedule. Arizona points out that it's pretty cool to be able to save lives, but they don't seem to absorb how this could be cooler than having an ironclad cocktail schedule.
Bailey is working on her sutures -- it seems that she's only finished two successfully so far. She's super shaky and breathing deep, and it's clear that it's a massive struggle for her. I guess it's good for her that Alma doesn't seem to be starting her back again at zero each time like she said she would. Alma then pulls a bottle of pills out of her pocket and tells Bailey that what would help her would be the medication, and says sincerely that she hates seeing her suffer. But Bailey is adamant that she's not taking anything, so finally Alma tells her to take a 5-minute break. Bailey is embarrassed and annoyed when Alma takes a quick picture of the scattered tools so that she can be sure Bailey doesn't rearrange anything while she's gone. When she leaves, Bailey seems to start to sink into despair and reaches out and touches one finger to the end of an instrument when Richard walks in, startling her. She tries to hide her tear-stained face and he either doesn't notice or graciously pretends not to notice her distress as she chastises him for being there. He says that it's boring being at home, and he'd rather be there touching up his skills than home channel surfing. He then notices the trays of scattered instruments and comments that he has no idea how she can expect to find anything in a mess like that. So I guess maybe he genuinely doesn't know what's going on with her, or at least the depth of it. He starts to straighten everything while Bailey looks at the door, seemingly terrified that now she's going to get in trouble.
Derek is trying a new approach with Becca, telling her to visualize her ligaments, but Becca still can't move the hand and is berating herself. Her husband comes in with some of her favorite chips but she snaps at him and sends him away, which obviously hurts him but he does it. Once he's gone she cries that she hates how she treats him, and that he's done everything for her and all she wants is to do one thing for him but she can't. It seems to be the last straw, and she declares that she's done taking part in the research. Derek talks to her calmly but an annoyed Callie finally asks curtly if they should schedule surgery to remove the sensors. Derek says that they aren't there yet, and then asks Callie to speak with her alone.
Steph goes in to check on her sheep, and is horrified to find alarms ringing and the vet doing chest compressions. She takes over but he tells her that Sheepie has been down for 20 minutes, she's gone.
Stephanie is devastated by this turn of events, but Mere tries to buck her up by pointing out that the Russians sent a bunch of dogs into space before a man ever walked on the moon. This doesn't help, so Mere calmly tells Steph that they'll do a necropsy, figure out what went wrong, and then try again. And they'll probably fail again but that's all part of progress and eventually, they'll get it right and save a life. Stephanie finally manages to pull herself together a little bit, and when Mere asks if she's with her, Steph finally nods yes.
Out in the hall, Callie and Derek are arguing about Becca -- Derek points out that even if she has a bad attitude, she shows up every day and is still trying. Callie admits that really she can't handle it because every single part of her life is full of arguing these days -- with Arizona, with Becca, and now with Derek. He's sympathetic, but tells her that they just haven't figured it out yet so it's frustrating for everyone. She sees a water bottle and asks dryly if it's wrong that she wishes it was a bottle of gin. Derek looks over and of course, because he's Derek, has a brilliant idea.
Arizona, meanwhile, is helping The Nitwits set up the room for the shower. Nitwit 1 tells her she thinks it's great that she and Callie are trying to work things out, because it's better for the kids. She then admits that her own husband cheated, but they are working it out for the sake of their three sons. Arizona doesn't get annoyed that April spilled her life's story to them and instead is interested to find out how they are working through it, and did they go to therapy? Nitwit 1 says that they didn't, because they didn't want to talk it to death and instead just tried to focus on moving forward and hoping it gets better one day. Arizona asks, with a hint of doubt, if that really works. In response, Nitwit 1 pours half a bottle of wine into her glass and starts guzzling, noting that they are still working on it. Arizona is not super comforted by this.
As Alma watches Bailey sweat her way through more sutures, Richard discreetly watches the two women. Bailey tries mightily, but still stops to recheck something and think to herself, which knocks her back down to only two completed. She's livid, and cries that this is actually her seventh one done, but Alma points out that she tugged at her fingers and straightened and instrument. Bailey is utterly frustrated and Alma pleads with her to again consider medication but Bailey screams a refusal at her. Richard walks over and orders more than asks Bailey to go with him to sneak into April's shower to steal some food, but Bailey says she doesn't need a break; she needs to get back into surgery. Weirdly I can kind of understand her as I myself resisted medication for depression, despite knowing that it helped many people that I love. But eventually therapy only did so much, and I took it, and man did it right my ship. For some reason, though, I was initially loathe to admit I was taking it and felt more comfortable admitting to many other things before I would confess that to someone. I've never completely figured out why; I just think it's that many people want to be "strong" enough to beat something (and horribly there's still a social stigma surrounding mental illnesses) but it's true that these are diseases and sometimes we need a little bit of assistance.
Mere finds Cristina in the printer room and tells her she heard about Nathan and is sorry. Cristina thanks her and congratulates her on the sheep, but Mere admits that the sheep died. It's the most normal exchange these two have had, and I almost fell off the sofa when they then talked about who needed the printer and each offered it to the other. Mere then asks what on earth is up with Smash and why he's now a totally different person than the guy who delivered her baby, and when Cristina says he's just growing as a person like they did, Mere tells her she knows people change, but now he's aggressive and mean. And then she asks the money question, wondering if maybe he's trying to be more like Cristina. MEREDITH. It doesn't come out in a mean tone, but anyone who thought about their words for half a second would realize how shitty that just came out, and of course Cristina's not going to take it graciously given everything that's gone on between the two. She's completely insulted and points out that Smash having an edge isn't a bad thing, and says that she herself isn't mean but rather effective. And then Mere takes that to mean that Cristina thinks Mere is not. This is exhausting and stupid. After some more fighting, Cristina gets a page and leaves without a word. It's like both of them forgot how to be human beings around each other.
The page she got was from Smash himself, and she runs to Nathan's room all worried. But actually, it turns out that Nathan is stabilizing and they can take him off of the oscillator. His parents begin to cry, and Cristina cautiously admits that implant seems to be working.
She and Smash walk out and around the corner all professionally, but once safely through a set of doors they cheer and then do a choreographed victory dance that they must have designed while in between bouts in the on-call room.
Princess hears James yelling in his room and goes in to find that he's gotten out of bed and is in full hallucination, yelling about needing the car keys to pick up Alex. He then shoves Princess into the wall, pinning her there until Alex comes by and intervenes. He grabs him roughly and yells at Princess to go.
She's terrified that Alex is going to kill his dad but after a moment Alex puts him back in bed and yells at him to sleep it off, which sounds like something he's done a million times before. They put soft restraints on James, and Princess is visibly shaken. After Alex asks if she is okay, she apologizes, and he's angry in a scared sort of way as he asks why she's sorry. He reminds her that James is a junkie, and he had to do this kind of thing with him beginning since age six. Running interference is like riding the saddest, most horrible bike in all the land.
Derek goes back to Becca and asks her to try once more. John, her poor devoted husband tells her it's fine if she wants to leave, but Becca sighs and offers to try. Derek then moves John in front of Becca and the robotic hand and tells her to look at him. He says that when you're thirsty you don't think about the mechanics of picking up the cup… so he just wants her to think about what she'd like to say to John. After a moment, the fingers twitch and then reach towards him and crying, he reaches his hand out and they touch. It's actually really sweet as he cries that he never thought she'd be able to touch him again, and Becca tearily and happily agrees. Even Callie can't help it and tears run down her cheeks too.
The other attendings have gathered for April's shower, and ha ha Mere and April have no idea what a salad spinner is because they are doctors and therefore unfamiliar with the preparation of food. People. I live out of the Trader Joe's freezer section and even I have picked up -- through the simple act of living in the world -- what a salad spinner is. Princess and Leah go in and find Richard eating food and periodically yelling out general niceties like, "Beautiful!" promising that it doesn't matter what they say as long as it's positive. April then picks up a gift from The Nitwits, and they immediately beg her to wait until later to open it. Because somehow it isn't obvious to her where this is going, she gets all emotional and assumes they remembered that she wants to wear their mother's veil… and then opens the box to find a pearl thong. I assume this item was chosen as a nod to one of James Remar's moments on Sex and the City when he gave the same thing to Samantha as a gift. No? Am I too scarily familiar with that show?
Anyhoodle, April is mortified and The Nitwits all prattle on about how it's for her wedding night, and they want to give her some tips (Cristina hilariously falls backward, howling with laughter during this whole awkward, shrill exchange, and I can't help but think that was a sincere reaction from Sandra Oh and they left it in because it was awesome), and yadda yadda it's a miracle Ducky found a man until April snaps and yells at them to shut up. She lets out what has clearly been bottled up for years -- that her acne cleared up, her braces came off, her pigeon toes were fixed with years of physical therapy, and dudes now find her sexy. She searches for words and finally says that she's not an ugly duckling, she's a swan, and by the way she's had sex before too. The Nitwits are absolutely aghast, and Mere, Cristina and Arizona all have no idea what to do and seem frozen in space. Finally, April fires The Nitwits as her bridesmaids and hires the three attendings as her new ones for her big day. This is surely going to end well.
Jackson walks out of Long Hair's room and finds Matthew there, pouting that Jackson owes him an apology because April told him what Jackson said about how he would have done the very same thing. The only thing is, Jackson lied to make April feel better and actually spent eight hours in surgery fixing the dude's neck. He can't help but ask if Matthew was trying to be the Big Man, getting in there to help before the actual surgeon to him could assess the situation? There's more chest puffing and whatnot between the two until they both finally call a truce by admitting that each of them just wanted to save the dude's life. Unsaid: and prove he has a larger package than the other. Matthew literally stands with his mouth hanging open -- I don't believe the guy is dumb, but then he goes and looks like that which makes it hard for me to keep defending him. He then tries to be the bigger man and tells Jackson he hopes to see him at the wedding. Jackson admits he might not go, but Matthew sucks up his pride and says that he knows it means a lot to April, so he hopes Jackson will come. And break it up as a midseason cliffhanger. Oh, wait, that's just me as a viewer who has seen television before, trying to predict the future there.
Bailey is working by herself in the dark, struggling mightily, when Richard comes over and reminds her that she called him a drunk. She almost comes completely unglued, apologizing with a tremulous voice and admitting it's torn her up inside. But Richard cuts her off to admit that she was right, because he's an alcoholic, which means he wants a drink just about all the time. He admits that's why he came to putter around in the skills lab -- he was bored at home and that could only lead to no good. She doesn't get his point so he goes on to say that he has a disease that can't be cured but that can be managed, and he needs people to help him manage it. He then pleads with her to accept that she has a disease, and to accept some help for it. He tells her they are all there for her when she's ready. Angrily she grabs the bottle of pills and opens it, but then stares him down and some of the anger fades out of her eyes, though she still looks terrified. Eventually, she takes out a pill and swallows it, and Mere tells us that the key to progress is knowing how to take the first step.
Callie and Arizona are at home, fighting about everything including HOW they fight with each other. Callie yells that she's sick of it, Arizona agrees, and yet another argument almost begins before Callie grabs Arizona in a kiss. She then admits that talking could be their problem, and Arizona, almost drunk from the smooch, admits maybe they shouldn't talk so much. Just talk a little, so you don't wind up needing to buy one of those gag wine glasses that holds the contents of an entire bottle, okay? The two smile and then share a long kiss.
Cristina, meanwhile, checks out little Nathan and smiles to find that he's doing well, while Mere VO's that you have to stick with it day in and day out, no matter what, because you're a pioneer.
Mere and Steph, meanwhile, are in with their sheep and Mere pulls out an actual carving knife to start the necropsy. It might be easier to think of the poor thing as a test subject and not just a farm animal if they used actual surgical tools instead of kitchen knives to go about their research, I'd think.
James is still murmuring to himself, deep in another hallucination, and orders someone to get their ass in the car, "Before I give you something to cry about." From the doorway, Alex mouths the words along with him, totally familiar with the threat, and Mere reminds us that they never said progress would be easy.
Lauren S is a writer who lives and works in Atlanta and plans never to wear dangling clothing around a taxi cab. She wants everyone to know: "The views expressed in my recaps and anything else I might write on TWoP are my own and do not necessarily reflect the views of my employer."