The Ugly Truth

S06E12

Ugh. I don't think it's a coincidence that Izzie came back and the episode was the worst they've had in quite a long while, though to be fair there was plenty to not like from more people than just her today. She finally comes back to Seattle after getting Mere's voicemail about Alex moving on, but then acts like she can just slip right in like she didn't totally selfishly run away from her husband and the rest of her life like a spoiled brat. Alex isn't super excited to see her, and clearly isn't excited by her idea to get a job in Tacoma so that the two of them can make their marriage work. They finally talk just a little bit when she's stuck in the CT machine and later when her scans come back clean Alex is thrilled -- so thrilled, in fact, that he realizes that he can make it through the horrible times in life, and that he deserves someone that won't just bolt when things don't go exactly her way. Izzie is crushed by the news, though the fact that she never saw this reaction coming speaks volumes in itself.

Things are pretty testy between Cristina and Teddy as well, after the little matter of Cristina offering up Owen like a trading card. Cristina still wants and loves Owen but admits to Mere she would (and did) choose surgery over love, and then tries to get her friends to admit they would choose the same way so she doesn't look so bad. She and Teddy have a difficult patient but Teddy goes the extra mile to save him so that his career doesn't end, and Cristina says that this proves Teddy understands how important one's career is. Teddy isn't sure she agrees, gets drunk, and spills all to Owen. Because he is amazing, however, he confronts Cristina and tells her he's fighting for her and going to get her to admit that she needs feelings and love that surgery alone can't give to her.

Callie comes down with the chicken pox and Lexie has to treat her on account of Arizona having never had it before. Arizona finally admits to Lexie, though, that she actually lied about that because she wanted to still be in the sexy, exciting phase of their relationship and not move on to the oozing, itchy sores phase. When Mark shows up and helps Callie scratch her pox (no, seriously, not a euphemism) Arizona realizes that if you love someone anything can be sexy, while Lexie, who has been watching the pox scratching as well, realizes she still loves Mark. She goes to talk to him later and he immediately spills that he slept with Addison, and she heaves a sigh of relief and admits to sleeping with Alex. Unfortunately Mark is campaigning to become the mayor of Double Standardville and turns on Lexie, saying that what she did was worse because she's the one who broke up with him, and he was worried because his daughter was having risky surgery. It's pretty disgusting, and Lexie holds firm through the conversation that they're on even ground, but Mark decides he can't speak or even look at her and stalks off.

But even with all of this selfish stupidity going on, Derek and Meredith easily get this week's blue ribbon in that category. Derek's livid about the Chief drinking again and Meredith's hiding it, but when he wants to go to the board she plays the Post-It Card and says she admitted the drinking to her husband, not to the head of neurosurgery. Derek agrees to not say anything but then turns around tries to tempt Richard with booze to see what happens. Richard has scheduled a complicated surgery to prove he's capable but when it comes time to do the surgery, Bailey is there instead as it seems the drink got the better of him once again -- it costs Meredith the chance to do the most crucial part of the surgery as Bailey thinks she's not ready. Derek is still desperate to go to the board but is also worried that people will think he did it for personal gain as he'll surely be made interim Chief. Finally, he blackmails Meredith: if he goes to the board and becomes Chief, the first thing he will do is hire Izzie back. Meredith unhappily agrees, but with Alex dumping Izzie and telling her to move away again, it turns out it might be for naught. Meredith accuses Derek of only wanting to tell on Richard so that he would become Chief, Derek accuses her of wanting to keep his problem a secret so she could do a fancy surgery, and neither of them ever really brings up the fact that it's just not a good idea to have one's Chief of Surgery, whether he's operating or not, be drunk all the time. Regardless, Mere greets Richard when he wakes from a booze-induced nap and has Jennings and the board waiting right outside the office to relieve him of his duties; it looks like Derek's probably going to be running the show, at least for the while.

We predict the plots of Shonda's new medical show Off the Map.

"Number one rule of surgery is 'limit exposure.' Keep your hands clean, your incisions small, and your wounds covered," Mere tells us. Bailey is doing just that with a patient and narrating to the full gallery that she's removed a tumor and placed catheters in the abdomen to flood it with heated chemo, which will target cancer cells and leave the other ones alone. Is this a real thing? I've never heard of this but it sounds kind of amazing. They then start tipping the gurney up and down and jiggling the poor guy to help make sure the chemo gets everywhere. It's like they're shaking a giant human cocktail.

Upstairs, once Bailey looks up and sees that Callie was there, Callie gets up to leave since she's got a headache and needs coffee. Arizona whispers a saucy suggestion that she knows what would work even better than coffee for a headache, and the ladies head out which leaves an open seat for Teddy... right to Cristina. The two squirm uncomfortably so it's apparent that they haven't yet addressed what happened the night before (I believe). Teddy comments that she's never seen this "hot chemo lavage" before, but rather than stick to banal conversation about groundbreaking surgical techniques, Cristina just says she thought Teddy was leaving. Somehow between then and now, the Chief asked her to stay a few weeks until her contract was up and Teddy agreed. Mere VO's, "Number two rule of surgery is 'when rule number one stops working, try something else.'" Cristina says that she didn't mean what she said, but Teddy just chuckles and reminds her that she offered to "trade Owen like a horse." Cristina's momentarily at a loss for words but when she tries to apologize Teddy shuts her down and tells her to forget about it. Mere: "Because sometimes you can't limit exposure."

Across town a different fight is in full swing -- this is why I'm fairly sure it's the day, as Meredith and Derek are having a screaming match about whether or not to go to the board about Richard. In real life, I'm sure would have just happened as soon as Meredith told Derek about Richard's drinking and not waited until the morning for storytelling purposes. Mere VO's: "Sometimes the injury is so bad, you have to cut and cut big." Derek is yelling that he's going to report Richard to the board, while Mere yells back that this will end Richard's career, and that Derek doesn't give anyone room to have flaws. Seriously, I think "running a hospital while intoxicated" is a bit more than someone who, say, bites their fingernails. I do think that Derek could take the step of talking to Richard directly before going to the board, but on the other hand that never really works with him even when he's not drinking. Mere tells him, "Flaws are unacceptable to McDreamy." He gets mad at her using the nickname but she goes on to say McDreamy is being a "McAss." Derek then asks if he's been drinking since the holidays. Dude, McDreamy can connect the McDots -- they're big enough -- but clearly he's just asking to get to Mere. Would it have been too much for anyone to show logical thought processes or concerns during this ridiculous fight? Mere wants him to admit that he wants Richard's job, but Derek just tells her he has a responsibility to the hospital. He won't admit to any job-coveting and instead says the conversation is over. As he storms out, however, Mere calls "Post-It!" He says she can't do it but she does, claiming that she told her husband, not the head of neuro, a secret about her friend. Seriously, now Richard is her friend? These two have had a complicated relationship the whole duration of this show that yes, has gotten better lately, but I don't know that they've made it to "friends." Dear show: Make up your mind about their relationship but don't make her hate him when it's convenient for one story and "friends" with him when it's convenient for another. My head is spinning. They yell some more but Derek gives, and when Mere smiles at her victory he's overcome by how cute she is and they make out. Honestly, this whole argument scene was so maddeningly stupid, I can't believe I just gave it this much real estate. Mere's pager beeps and she tells Derek that Izzie is coming home and that she has to tell Alex. Derek tells her he won't go to the board or even say a word, but asks her to think about what he said.

Mere walks down the hall and when she opens the door and tells Alex about Izzie, sees that her sister is there in bed too, and both are very without clothes. Once they're all dressed they meet up in the kitchen where Mere berates them for falling into bed when shit got hard with their significant others. Alex rightfully points out that she can neither judge nor give relationship advice and calls her out on being a dirty mistress herself just recently, but she points out that it was two years previously and that the wife didn't have cancer. Lexie freaks out about now being a dirty mistress herself, but defends that it's no big deal as they have slept together before. After some more arguing, Lexie panics at the thought that Mere will tell Derek and he'll tell Mark, but Meredith vows that no one is telling anyone anything because no one needs to know. This was obviously Izzie's clue to walk in, though she didn't actually hear what went on, so she just asks with a sharp edge to her voice what they're talking about. I know I don't give her much but I'll be fair and give her this -- her shoulder-length, curly blonde hair and her makeup both look phenomenal. She's a bitch, but she's a good-looking one.

Derek may have sworn to not say anything, but he didn't swear to not stomp around and act put-out and obvious that something is wrong, nor did he promise to not ask leading questions. He storms into the Chief's office and tells him that the OR ran out of sterile supplies the night before and surgeries were held up for an hour, but Richard replies that he already knew this, blames it on understaffing, and asks if there is anything else. This right here is what one might use in a rational, logical argument regarding whether or not to report him to the board, but of course it's the kind of thing that never actually comes up. Derek sits down and tells Richard he wants to help, and when Richard brushes it off because he doesn't get the depth of the offer, Derek repeats his offer and points out that he is no longer operating and the only person he is teaching is Meredith. He tells him that there's no shame in asking for help. Richard isn't amused and tells Derek to help by doing his own job, and asks if there is anything else. Derek spits, "No, I'm done," and then does some champion flouncing out of the office. He could really teach a class on that.

Back at the house Izzie tries to talk to Alex, but he pretends to be fascinated by his breakfast and will only give her short answers. She tells him that Mere said he might be moving on and mercifully, finally admits that she was wrong to blame him for getting her fired and that it wasn't his fault. It's too little, too late -- he tells her he doesn't want to have a big talk and has to leave for work. She says she'll see him there as she's having a PET scan later, and he asks, genuinely worried, if she's okay. It's the only time he softens during their exchange, and it's sweet that no matter what happened or will happen between them, he does want her to be healthy. She tells him that she applied for some jobs and just wants them to know she is healthy, and mentions that one commuting distance away, in Tacoma. "So... we'd be okay." She tries to start a Deep Conversation again so Alex leaves, telling her that it sucks these days and she should be happy she doesn't work there. It's not the time for that joke, and he apologizes, but she puts on some false bravado and tells him it's fine, she's going to get an awesome job in Tacoma and he'll be jealous. Even though she seems nervous when she tries to talk to him, it's kind of gross how she clearly just assumes that everything is going to work out okay just because she finally came back to town and said she was sorry, like that is going to erase everything that happened.

At the hospital, Mere comes upon Richard putting a surgery up on the board and is clearly dismayed when she sees that he is signing himself up to do a whipple, but he tells her that it's the best way to come back: "Go big or go home." Avery comes up, worried that he has lost his spot now that Bailey isn't doing the surgery, but Richard tells him that he's welcome to help and that he can open the patient so that Mere can "dissect the neck of the pancreas from the portal vein." Mere is dumbfounded and stutters that that is the hardest part of the surgery, while Avery adds that it's a 5th year procedure. Richard just happily tells her that it's what they have been practicing, and she's ready, but... she cuts him off before he can offer an alternative and insists that she can do it.

Once at work, Alex goes to the ER to see if Hunt needs any help, but Hunt can barely hear the question because someone is singing scales in a booming voice. He tells Alex to put a stop to it, so Alex finds the location of the singing and pulls back the curtain, where he has to finally scream in the guy's face to get him to shut up. The patient, Aaron, snottily informs Alex that he had to do it to get everyone to see how serious his problem is -- he has lost his upper register. Alex is not nearly as horrified by this as Aaron is, and Nurse Tyler is back to give the guy the best sideways stink-eye. Aaron declares that he needs antibiotics because his boyfriend, standing to him, gave him bronchitis and he needs his voice back as he's going to be performing in Tosca. His boyfriend, Jeff, tells him in a rather defeated voice that he didn't give him bronchitis, but Aaron tells Alex and Tyler that Jeff teaches piano to children, sounding like it's a job on par with scraping dog poo from the sidewalk, and he's sure one of the little brats passed it along. Alex just orders an x-ray and brushes off the idea of taking Aaron for it himself, but when he goes back to help Hunt it turns out he's gone, so Alex is stuck with the singer who starts up his scales again.

Callie and Arizona are in the on-call room, hard at work on getting rid of Callie's headache. As they are making out, though, Arizona notes that Callie is hot, and while Callie thinks it's a sexy compliment, Arizona means that she's feverish. She pulls aside the neck of Callie's scrubs and sees spots on her chest; appalled, she announces that Callie has chicken pox.

After watching Bailey's surgery, Cristina tells Mere about how Teddy loves Owen and that she told Teddy she could have him. Mere is speechless, so Cristina adds a few more relatively important details -- that Teddy is an amazing teacher and that for the first time in forever Cristina is happy and feels like herself again, and that of course she didn't mean it because she loves Owen but that her relationship means she can't also have Teddy. The fly in the ointment that Cristina seems to be ignoring is that after her outburst, Teddy doesn't seem entirely thrilled to be teaching Cristina anymore but I guess as long as she's there the teaching is just a given. Cristina, showing some pretty good self-awareness, wonders if maybe she meant it. Mere shuts down that train of thought right away and tells her that while she can admit these things to Meredith, she can't say this kind of thing out loud to anyone else because it's just Not Done. Mere likens it to someone having an ugly baby -- everyone knows it's true, but you never ever say it out loud. Cristina doesn't really follow and asks her if, with a gun to her head, she'd choose surgery over Derek. Mere doesn't answer but just repeats that she can't say this to anyone, least of all Owen.

Callie is now in a sealed room that seems more appropriate for someone with a flesh-eating disease than mere chicken pox, although I didn't even realize until recently that a vaccine even exists for the disease, so what do I know? I'm from the generation where chicken pox was simply a rite of passage. And even though I know it's more serious in adults, this seems... extreme. Arizona brings in Lexie to help, and Callie is pissed as Arizona told her she was bringing in a specialist. What she really meant is that she was brining someone who had the vaccine, and explains that she hasn't had the disease nor has she been vaccinated, so someone else has to help out. Callie wonders how she could possibly not have been exposed while working with children, and Arizona's excuse that she does surgeries, rather than treats diseases, isn't the strongest excuse ever heard. Callie declares that she's going home but Arizona won't allow it since she'll touch things and expose a ton of people. Callie starts scratching and Arizona tells her to stop it or she'll scar, but this doesn't go over well with her angry girlfriend.

Mere is practicing for her part of the whipple while Izzie prattles on about needing to work again, and thinks out loud about her choices. She thinks she'll get an offer in Oregon but says that's too far and she can't do that to Alex. I think Alex would be relieved to both know where you are and yet have that not be here, but she's still figuring that her wretched selfish behavior will be excused. She asks Mere if she can have Derek call Tacoma and put in a good word, and then she leaves as Derek walks in. When Mere fills him in he notes condescendingly that Tacoma isn't in the top 20 but Mere is more of a romantic and tells him dreamily that it would be close and would help her fix her marriage, so Derek asks for the number. He then mentions the real reason for seeking her out -- he saw that Richard is doing a whipple and she is assisting. She rather unconvincingly chirps that clearly this means Richard is fine, while I rub at the knot in my forehead that has formed because I've slapped myself so many times in disbelief and disgust. Seriously, why is she acting so stupid? Why on earth would signing himself up for a ridiculously hard surgery prove that he's fine? Derek thinks it's ridiculous for him to have scheduled something so difficult for his first time back and he and Mere start to argue again until once again she calls Post-It. My patience for this is already gone and we're not even halfway through this episode. Derek accepts it, although less gracefully than before, and he kisses her and leaves. Mere looks pretty unsure of everything she just said about Richard being ready, but then tells herself out-loud that he's fine.

Cristina and Teddy are now in with Alex and Aaron as Alex draws fluid from Aaron's lung. Cristina begins to explain that this might not be an infection, but Teddy cuts her off to give the task to Alex as he's the one who diagnosed the patient. Alex smirks, fortunately behind Aaron's back, and then says that this fluid could be a sign of heart failure or cancer. Horrified, Aaron asks if they will have to remove his lung. Jeff cuts in after the doctors answer to assure him that it's only one possibility, but Aaron interrupts him as if he's not even there and tells the doctors that singing is his entire life. Stung, Aaron adds for him that what he meant to say is that singing is his life besides Jeff. Aaron stays silent, as he obviously does not agree that his boyfriend might mean more to him than his career.

Derek is slumped over the railing of the hospital bridge, and Bailey joins him to gripe about Richard taking her whipple and letting Mere do a part of the procedure that Bailey herself didn't do for the first time until a year ago. She says that the Chief's judgment isn't clear nor rational -- she's very emotional about it, but it's the most levelheaded and straightforward thing anyone has said regarding Richard, and this from someone who did try and cover up for him not long ago. Derek says he can't do anything but Bailey tells him that he's the only one who can, then sadly tells him about how disappointed she was that Richard wasn't there to see her crazy awesome hot chemo that morning, which was a really big deal for her. She admits she doesn't know why she thought he would show anyway, though, because, "He's gone. He's been gone a long time." Derek looks thoughtful while Bailey walks off.

Lexie brings Callie some charts to go over some of her patients, as Arizona thought that might help her take her mind off the itching. Clearly it's been a problem, as her hands are swaddled in gauze and she begs Lexie to take them off, and then when Lexie refuses, orders her to do it as her superior. Lexie had been warned about both of these reactions by Arizona, whose service she is on today, so that means Callie can't order her around. She refuses to talk about the patients as Lexie goes through the chart and instead begs "Little Grey" to help her out. That nickname is killing Lexie after her saucy night with Alex but Callie doesn't notice and begins talking about her epic pain and how Lexie will never understand. In response, Lexie blurts out that she slept with Alex. I have to interrupt here a moment and ask, why does Callie not have any calamine lotion on? That would help at least somewhat to help the itching and therefore also the level of lunacy she has going on right now. Lexie babbles about how she regrets what she did because she loves Mark and was just scared about the having a daughter/being a grandpa thing. Callie stares at her and then finally asks why she's telling her this; Lexie explains that she's in pain too. Callie merely informs her, "I have pox between my buttcheeks," and then tells her that her pain doesn't even compare before ordering her out.

Mere is still practicing for her procedure while the others eat lunch around her; Cristina is polling everyone as to what they would choose between surgery and love. When she asks Alex, Mere obnoxiously cuts in and demands that he would choose Izzie. Izzie didn't just ditch Alex -- she ditched everyone and then only showed up for a few minutes when she needed something from them before leaving again. I know that married Meredith is happy, but let's all at least not ignore what happened, shall we? Avery is in there since he's operating with Meredith later, and he wants to know why they have to choose, as he wants both and Meredith agrees. Cristina takes Meredith's advice from earlier to heart and doesn't say why she's asking, but she just insists they have to choose and keeps pressing them. Izzie then walks in and asks, "Choose what?" like she belongs there. Her scan was postponed so she thought she would join them for lunch. Alex ignores her but Cristina picks right back up and reminds them all of the thrill of surgery. Meredith finally admits that if a gun was to her head she'd pick surgery, which makes Cristina endlessly happy and she wonders out loud why that was so hard to admit and why it's so taboo. Izzie calls her crazy and everyone is surprised as if we haven't heard her spout this kind of thing before. She says that surgery is just one's job and that if you lose a job you can find another, but you can't do that with your love. Alex continues to ignore her while she stares at him and says that nothing else matters. Honestly, she was singing quite a different tune before she realized that Alex might finally be tired of being treated like a doormat and might actually be moving on. He finally pipes up and tells her that he'd choose surgery. "Love comes and goes. Surgery doesn't." She's disheartened by this but there's no time for debate as he and Cristina are paged about test results. After they leave, Izzie of course declares that she chooses love, and Mere jumps out of her chair and yells, "Yes!"... because she did the surgery correctly. Sorry Izzie, it really isn't all about you.

Cristina and Alex have gone to give Aaron his results -- he has cancer in the lining of his lung and a tumor growing, but the best-case scenario is that they won't have to remove anything but the tumor. Jeff is thrilled and repeats it but Aaron bites his head off and reminds him that the worst thing is that he loses his lung, and then rips into him when he tries to be positive and declares his life to be over. Teddy tries to assure him that he'll recover and move on but he demands to know how he'd do that as he's a singer. When Jeff suggests teaching, Aaron is completely cruel in announcing that he'd rather die than live like Jeff, teaching or directing. Teddy encourages him to think about it and get a second opinion, but Aaron declares that he just wants his lung, sounding like a petulant child. He tells a story about how he's too big for everything, both physically and emotionally; for example he wants to throttle the waiter if his food isn't cooked correctly. Very theatrically, he says that he doesn't, though -- he just sends it back politely. I don't believe it for a second, as this is the same guy singing over everyone in the ER so that he'd get more attention. He says that he spends his life making himself smaller so that he can fit in, but on stage he can express every emotion at the huge level that he really feels it. He tells them that if he can't do that, he doesn't want to live. He then turns to Jeff and assures him that Jeff wouldn't want him to live that way either. I hope I wasn't supposed to turn sympathetic after that little speech, because I only found myself saying that maybe he'd have to do what everyone has to do, which is try and be a decent person, living in polite society. I have no patience for people that think life can only work one way -- their way. Things don't go as planned. Pull yourself together and move on.

On a lighter note, Owen is smuggling sterile supplies into his locker and totally doesn't see Derek sitting in the dark, watching him. Derek calls out to him but assures him that he understands and as Owen leaves, Derek calls out and says that he has to do something. He trails off at that so Owen asks what is stopping him; when Derek says that it's Meredith, Owen chuckles and calls her, "The other half of the twisted sisters." Derek laughs and tells him that's a rather perfect name, and honestly I have to agree that it's rather brilliant. Owen asks what is stopping him and Derek admits that he'll look like he did this only for personal gain. After a moment Owen replies that no one goes into battle hoping to win a medal, but that you just do the right thing and sometimes that means a medal while other times it means you get killed. Derek asks how he knows what is right, and Owen says that it is whatever the best thing is for the most people. Again, we've watched so much fighting and posturing and excuses from both him and Meredith that it's refreshing to have someone just say something sensible. Owen says that the right thing is the thing that keeps the most people alive, and Derek and his hair ponder this.

It's finally time for Izzie's scan and... Alex is running it? That's what it looks like, in which case I'm not sure why the scheduled time mattered so much. He's being nice -- despite everything he obviously still cares for her well being -- so she screws up her courage and asks if he has moved on. After a moment, he admits he slept with someone, and Izzie closes her eyes and curses him before asserting that they will get through it. She then asks him to hold her hand so she knows he hasn't left, which is all very deep and meaningful on both the scan level as well as their relationship level, but it's also dumb because her arms are up over her head inside the machine. Alex points this out but offers to hold her foot and they have probably the sweetest moment they have had since she got back, even though it's still plenty awkward.

Derek, meanwhile, marches into the Chief's office and though Richard tries to shoo him out, he pulls a bottle of booze out of a brown paper bag and places it on the desk in front of Richard. Richard is absolutely silent as Derek theatrically gets a glass and places it to the bottle, then opens the bottle and pours a glass. Richard glares at him and asks if he wants him to drink this; Derek answers that he doesn't want that, but he thinks that he will drink it after Derek leaves, even though he'll try not to. Derek adds that he also believes this won't be Richard's first drink today. With that he turns and walks out, shockingly flounceless. I guess even he realizes this is a sad occasion that doesn't require his most self-righteous gait. Richard drops his head into his hand.

Once in Aaron's surgery, Teddy is dismayed to see that the tumor is colossal and that she'll have to remove his lung and diaphragm. Then, as if trying to convince herself, she says to no one in particular that she's doing what is best for optimal survival. After a moment, though, she changes her mind and decides to remove the tumor and just throw in some of that groundbreaking chemotherapy that Bailey tried that morning. It's kind of hilariously absurd how easy she makes this solution sound, and Cristina voices some token opposition by reminding her that the procedure was only proven to work for abdominal tumors. Teddy tells her that research was also being done to apply it to cases like these, and that as he's a singer he needs his lung. Cristina Thinks deeply about all this while Teddy embarks on her awesomely spur-of-the-moment, rare, and complicated procedure that just happens to show she understands someone's desperate need for their career. It's all so very convenient!

Callie wakes up from a nap, finally with lotion on her pox, and finds Mark sitting to her bed. He explains that he had them as a kid, and then climbs into bed with her since she's obviously unhappy. He asks her about LA and he says that Addison did nick an artery after all, but she fixed it and Sloan and the baby are fine. It feels sort of like he rushes through all of that though so that he can admit that he slept with Addison. Callie's not thrilled to know this and when Mark asks if he should tell Lexie she assures him that he absolutely should not. It's good he can't see her face as he goes on about how Lexie is such a good person. He's surprised at her advice but she holds firm on the keeping it to himself. She then moans in discomfort and so he crawls over her so that he's spooning her, and he begins to rub his forearm over her clothed arm and his cheek on her shoulder, pointing out that this won't leave any scarring. Callie appears to be happier than she's ever been in her life.

Alex goes down to the waiting room and tells an amazed Jeff that they saved Aaron's lung. Jeff is, like Alex, happy but there's an undercurrent of something else in his tone when he asks what is . Alex warns him that it will be a long recovery but that Aaron will be fine, and Jeff finally asks him if it makes him horrible to be a bit disappointed since losing a lung would have made Aaron to live like everyone else and he'd have to do all the things he finds demeaning. Jeff goes on to say that what is really demeaning is loving a man and taking care of everything for him, including his humidifiers, which clearly Aaron cares about more than he actually cares about Jeff. Alex tells him, not unkindly, that they have a ton of nurses to care for Aaron and that Jeff could leave right now. But Jeff sadly replies that he loves him and adds that Alex should hear him sing. Alex says that no one sings that well, but Jeff says he does. I say go see him in concert, then, but find yourself a man who doesn't treat you like a doormat.

By Lauren S

Izzie finds Alex in the locker room getting ready to leave, and after she asks him about how his surgery went, she hands over the scans. He's absolutely thrilled that things are so good, and grabs her in a bear hug. Izzie smiles, and seems to be content that things are now going to all be okay, and she says to Alex that it's like the cancer never happened. Alex, though, reminds her that it did all happen -- the cancer, marriage, dying, coming back, and then her ditching everyone and coming back. Almost awed, he says first that they made it through and then amends it to, "I got through it." Izzie is still happily holding him as he tells her how much he loves her, because until he met her he didn't think he was a good guy on account of his upbringing, but now he knows that he's a good man. He thanks her, and then he pulls out of the hug and adds that he knows he's good enough not to deserve this. The smiles falls right off of Izzie's face as he explains that he should haven't to feel like he loves her so much he almost hates her, and that he deserves someone who will stay. Good for you, Alex! Not just because I don't like Izzie specifically, but even if she was someone else I wouldn't support the running off because of a mistake and then the staying gone and worrying everyone until it suited her to come back and pick up like there would be no consequences to her actions. Alex tells her that he's happy she's okay and has a job (probably thinking of Tacoma, here) and then tells her, "I want you to go. And be happy. And not come back." She's absolutely horrified, and they just sit there. Seriously Izzie, go!! Don't come back!

Richard, far from taking care of "administrative duties" as has been his excuse for everything this season, is snoring on his sofa when he wakes and sees Mere sitting on the coffee table, looking at him. As he sits up she looks to one of the windows where the board members are waiting. He apologizes about the surgery but she cuts him off and assures him that he doesn't have to apologize for anything. That seems to raise a flag and he thinks a moment as Meredith gets up and walks away; he turns and sees the board waiting outside. To his credit, Jennings looks rather sad about what he's clearly about to do. Mere's VO starts up: "In surgery, the healing process begins with a cut. An incision. The tearing of flesh." I don't know why, but this week's VO seems even more over-the-top than usual, just battering us over the head with everything going on with our various couples.

Cristina opens her apartment door and sees Owen standing there with sad eyes. She demands to know where he was and says she left him 10 messages, but underneath her bravado it's obvious she was worried. When he doesn't respond she asks if he's drunk, and he just grabs her and kisses her almost violently. She pushes him away and asks what's up, and he tells her that she would miss that, and explains that she thinks surgery is going to make her feel, to make her be happy. She grabs her wine glass and takes a big swig, clearly realizing what must have happened. Owen tells her that she thinks nothing matters but people do matter. "We matter." Instead of getting pissed and running at what happened, he's going to fight for his love, and it's incredibly awesome. He tells her, "So you don't get to toss me aside. I won't let you." She stares at him with tears in her eyes before crumbling and kissing him passionately. Mere tells us: "We have to damage the healthy flesh, in order to expose the unhealthy.

"It feels cruel." Lexie runs after Mark as he walks out of the hospital and asks him how Sloan's surgery went, but his response is to blurt out that he slept with Addison. She's super relieved, which surprises him, but immediately she confesses to sleeping with Alex. He quickly goes from downcast to stunned as Lexie babbles like she always does when she's nervous. She thinks this is great and their transgressions cancel each other out, but Mark, when he finally can speak, asks if she slept with Karev. When she repeats that she did, Mark lets loose with some fantastic hypocrisy, asking if she really slept with him when he was with his sick daughter and hurting. Lexie, thank goodness, replies by pointing out he wasn't hurting so much as having sex with Addison. Mark only sees this in terms of himself, though, and reminds her that she broke up with him and then declares that he can't even look at her, and he leaves. It's absolute bullshit. Lexie is speechless, understandably, since she's been thrust into a no-win situation by Mark's massive double standard.

Izzie has gone back home and is packing, with open boxes all around. Wait, so she first moved into the trailer and then fled town indefinitely but she left enough at Meredith's house to need big moving boxes? That's nice of her. Mere asks if Izzie knows what it cost Meredith to make this job happen because yes, the Chief would still be running the hospital drunk and things would be just dandy if not for this. Come on, Mere. Izzie just tells her to apologize to Derek but Mere replies that it's not about that, and tells her that she can't just walk away from people and throw them away. It's a little late for that lesson, don't you think? Izzie just tells her she can't stay, she has to start over elsewhere, so Mere finally pleads, "Please don't go." She calls this Izzie's home, but as she said at lunch Izzie tells her that this is just somewhere she worked, and she can do that anywhere. Mere turns and leaves. I either mistyped her voiceover or they edited a sentence so badly that when they cut it in half they either added or forgot words so that it didn't make sense, but the gist is that against common sense, the cutting works.

By Lauren S

Cristina and Teddy are in the ICU and look in at Jeff sitting to Aaron's bed. Quietly, Cristina tells Teddy that she gets It, but Teddy is annoyed and baffled as to what she might mean. Cristina calmly tells her that she chooses surgery over a guy and won't apologize to that, especially to Teddy, because she proved by saving Aaron's lung that she understands that. When the right thing to do was to remove the lung, Teddy knew Aaron didn't want to live without his "gift" and Teddy understood that. Cristina says that she chooses her gift, and that she wants to be great and learn from Teddy. "I choose my gift," she repeats.

Izzie finds Mere and asks her how the surgery went, and Mere lies and said it was great. Izzie is her old happy self and congratulates her before asking if she's Derek has called Tacoma. Again, Mere lies and says she doesn't know. Izzie tells her that the scans came back and she's in great shape, then asks if Derek could mention when he calls that she's not dying of cancer. She declares that she's going to get the job, get Alex back, and be herself again before she turns to go show Derek the scans. Mere stops her and says that she'll go tell Derek while Izzie goes and tells Alex about her results. Unlike most people on this show, she can lie fairly convincingly and Izzie skips off before Mere's smile dies.

She finds Derek and tells him he can go to the board, but when he goes to hug her she shoves him away and walks out. Derek stares after her, sad and a little confused. Look dude, she may be acting like an idiot but she's always been consistent about that and I'm not sure why you thought she'd be happy about caving to your blackmail offer.

Owen rushes into Joe's, late for a drink with Teddy, but she tells him that it's all good because it gave her a chance to get drunk. And she is DRUNK -- he has to be REALLY late even if she was pounding shots. She slides a shot and a beer over to him and he asks the occasion, but she launches right in to a commentary on his love life, rather to Owen's alarm. Slurring, she explains that she thought Beth (his former fiancée) was an idiot, or at least not good enough for him, because she said that once they were married she was done teaching and planned to just start having babies, which Teddy dismissed as having "zero ambition." Owen is super uncomfortable and tries to cut in but she's on a drunken roll, and goes on to talk about how Cristina is the total opposite and tells him that she is beautiful and talented and then admits that Cristina is right and Teddy does understand her. At this point Owen stands up and hurriedly asks for the bill so Teddy, knowing she's losing her window of opportunity, blurts out that Cristina was willing to trade him, that if Teddy stayed she could have him. Owen freezes, completely appalled.

By Lauren S

"You risk exposure for the sake of healing." Very literally, (at least to Callie who doesn't know that Arizona lied) Arizona climbs into bed with Callie and when Callie protests, says she'll risk getting sick. Thankfully, someone finally thought to put some lotion on Callie's spots.

"And when it's over, once the incision has been closed, you wait." Meredith and Derek are in bed under Derek's brain diagram, lying on their backs and definitely not touching. Mere is staring at the ceiling while Derek has his eyes serenely closed, but he's definitely not sleeping as he answers Mere when she asks if he saw Richard before he left -- he didn't because he didn't think it would make it any easier. Accusingly, Meredith asks if he means easier for Richard or himself. Derek tells her that it was the best and only thing to do and that she knows it, but Mere tells him to stop pretending as it's just the two of them there, and to admit that he did it for himself. He chose surgery and ambition over love. Again, WILL NO ONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN? Well, not children, but how about him choosing the well-being of the patients and the hospital? What about the doctors that ran out of sterile supplies because Richard mismanaged things? What about that poor whipple patient if Richard had really tried to go through with the surgery? But no one brings up any of that, instead Derek just accuses her of being selfish too -- that she knew Richard wasn't ready to operate but she wanted to do the surgery so she turned a blind eye. Derek tells her that they are the same. "You wait. And you hope that your patient will heal. That you haven't, in fact, just made everything worse." She glances at him for one second, and then we're done for the week.

By Lauren S

I guess now we really are to believe that Derek did this at least in part for personal gain, and I know they've been trying to suggest that for a while now, but the problem is that it's never been believable -- in every episode where someone has broached the subject, it has always just seemed shoved in there and not actually ever shown. While Derek has mentioned wanting to be Chief someday, I've never gotten the impression he wants to step on Richard to do that. And while he's certainly got a number of flaws and I'm not the president of the McDreamy Fan Club, I don't get the impression he really enjoyed ending Richard's career prematurely due to Richard's illness. And I especially don't believe that Meredith wasn't saying anything just because she wanted a cool surgery. I could have gone with her not wanting to complicate her relationship further with Richard, given that they only have started getting along relatively recently, but that was never even suggested. It's been extremely aggravating, and I only hope that this story is fleshed out more satisfyingly as we move forward or else this knot in my forehead is only going to get bigger from continued smacking.