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How best to describe this week's episode? Well, most of it made me want to stab myself with a finely sharpened toothbrush.
That is exactly what has happened to Eric Stoltz, a death row prisoner who has been brought in after being beaten in a prison fight. Mere and Cristina are not happy that both of them are assigned to the same case, on account of them still not speaking to each other. Things are even more awkward because the two attendings on the case are Shepherd and Hunt. Meredith wants to make the guy more comfortable but Cristina and Derek want him to only get the amount of care he needs to survive and kind of relish him being in pain. When the girls are in the room with him alone Cristina asks what he did and he tells them serenely about how he slit the throats of five women in three days and really enjoyed doing it. It's disgusting and does put you firmly on the side of not having any sympathy for the guy even though it turns out he does have a toothbrush shiv still lodged in his spine. They operate on him to take it out, Derek pouting self-righteously the whole time. (Which might have made more of an impact if this wasn't the way he acts every week now.) Hunt tries lamely to be a neutral party while they're in the OR so Cristina turns on him... basically it means there was literally nothing enjoyable to watch of the entire storyline. Sadie does finally tell Mere she needs to make up with Cristina or else she'll drive Cristina away for good, reminding Mere that they aren't really close anymore because Mere did the same thing to Sadie years ago.
Bailey is treating a kid who she has seen for three years as he's gradually had most of his intestine taken out. Before his procedure his surgeon drops dead of a massive heart attack, so a new young, cutesy pediatric surgeon who wears those tennis shoes with the wheels in him takes over. Bailey's pissed that Arizona, the new doc, takes a bleaker look of her patient's situation than Bailey would like and spends her time second guessing every move she makes. She runs to Richard for help but he's busy feeling sorry for the state of his hospital while he sulks in a dark OR and only points out that she's hated every new attending when they first started. Bailey finally has to admit that Arizona is right, and that her patient Jackson is horribly ill and needs a couple of transplants. Fortunately the good thing that comes of it is at least it snaps Richard out of his pity party when she goes to him for help on the case.
The one bright spot of the episode -- or rather, the two bright spots -- are Callie and Mark, who spend their day trying to keep each other from lusting after/sleeping with the intern objects of their desire. The chemistry between the two means I tend to like any scene they have together no matter how frothy it is, and thank goodness. Because the rest of the hour not filled with anything above is filled with the ghostly love triangle. Izzie decides she has to tell Alex she's been seeing Denny and is shocked that Alex seems not to care. Granted, this is because Alex is sane and assumes she is too, and he thinks she is just still grieving and having fantasies about Denny and doesn't get that he's really, truly there. For some reason Alex still loves her, and he bakes her a cake for her birthday to show it. Even Denny has to admit it's a sweet gesture, and right now nothing kills me more than the fact that I agree with him about something. Wait, no -- the fact that I even have to talk about a love triangle that involves a ghost kills me even more.
Look at the show's most annoying storylines. Come back on Wednesday for the full detailed episode recap.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Cristina picks us up right where she left off -- she's standing on the vent letting air blow up her pants as Mere voiceovers, "We all get at least one good wish a year over the candles on our birthday. Some of us throw in more. On eyelashes, fountains, lucky stars -- and every now and then, one of those wishes come true." The fulfilled wish is Mere and Derek in bed together while she complains about not wanting to go to work and deal with Cristina with her "mean face." She thinks a quickie would make her feel better, and Derek is more than happy to oblige. VO: " So what then? Is it as good as we hoped? Do we bask in the warm glow of our happiness?" A ferry is merrily riding through the water in what is I'm sure is supposed to be some sort of gross Meredith metaphor. "Or..." The blissful music stops as Mere and Cristina see and ignore each other at work and Mere's VO wraps up, "Do we just notice we've got a long list of other wishes waiting to be wished?" I wish that this stupid fight was over, or at least fleshed out to be more than the girls sulking self-righteously, but I think is one wish that isn't coming true for at least a while.
In happier interactions, George wishes Izzie a happy birthday -- she's caught off-guard, being spoken to by a human, but she thanks him. Bailey rushes up and gives them their assignments: George is going to the pit, Alex is with Bailey, Izzie has to do the clinic budget (ah, so that's how she can spend yet another day having sex with her imaginary man and not bothering with pesky "patients" or "real work") and Cristina and Meredith are to meet the Chief in the ambulance bay. Both of them demand to know why they have to work together, Cristina with her head in her hands like this is the world's biggest headache while Meredith just whines. Why are they even fighting again? And why have they, with one of the most functional relationships on the show, not just talked about it? It's certainly not making for good viewing.
The Silent Snotties meet up with their respective boy-whatever-they-ares in the hallway and Mere asks what they've got. Derek just hands her a paper to read so Cristina asks Hunt, but he just walks away. Meredith reads something about "Caldwell" and asks if that refers to the prison. The Chief comes in and confirms it, asking if they have all read up on the case. Cristina is decidedly out-of-sorts that she has to lie and pretend she knows what's up. Things only get worse as Richard goes on to say that the patient was beaten and has multiple leg wounds, mentioning the guards that will be with him at all times and that the doctors are to leave his cuffs and leg irons on at all times and to watch their syringes and other sharp objects. Hunt finally hands her a copy of the paper as Richard explains that no interns will be on the case because he wants it kept as quiet as possible. That is on account of the "PDR" mentioned on the paper Cristina reads, which stands for "Prisoner, Death Row." Everyone puts on their Very Serious Faces as an ambulance comes up and Eric Stoltz is unloaded and politely asks everyone how they are doing.
Eric's in a lot of pain but Derek and Cristina are both at a loss for any sympathy. Meredith seems more affected by his moaning and repeated questions about if anything is wrong with his legs. They say they didn't find anything in his legs, and then Mere and Cristina bicker about what kind of films to take. Hunt jumps in to say more films can't hurt, having no idea just how damning it will be that he's not immediately backing anything Cristina says. Derek warns Eric that they'll work more if he talks less, and Meredith calls his name with a warning tone. Eric says that Derek will warm up when they get to know each other, but Derek spits back that it's unlikely. Eric calmly tells him, "We're not that different, you and I," and explains, "People are alive when they meet us, and then that all changes somehow." I think the most telling thing about my feelings for Derek is that I let out a delighted chuckle at that line, as well as the blustery anger from Derek that he tries to control. Unfortunately I'm sure this means we will get yet another scene with him being upset at how many of his patients die, because the writers seem to think we don't really get it yet. Guys -- there's having a running theme, and then there's just doing the same thing over and over again and this angst with Derek is very much in the latter category now.
Mark's gazing at the surgical board when Lexie comes up and happily says hello. He turns and announces that he made one promise to his best friend and couldn't even stick to it, so despite how fantastic she is they are never going to hook up ever again. She agrees and leaves but even she doesn't seem totally torn up because come on, we all know Mark well enough to know that probably won't stick. He, however, looks incredibly tortured.
George has gotten a patient named Margaret who broke her hip. At the news, she looks to the ceiling and yells, "Are you kidding me?!?" Apparently she does this a lot since she started breaking all of her bones doing totally innocuous things. After six breaks in one year, including breaking her fingers while doing yoga, she decided to start yelling to a higher power in which she doesn't believe. George suggests they have ortho run some tests, as they might accomplish more that way than with the yelling.
Bailey and Alex's patient is a kid named Jordan Prescott, and she's clearly emotionally attached to him after years of treatment. They banter until the surgeon, Dr. Kenley, has Bailey take Mrs. Prescott outside to go through the procedure while he checks out Jackson. Mrs. P is really worried because her son seems to be jaundiced, but Bailey just assures her that they'll check everything out. She then tells us, I mean Alex, that Jackson has already had twelve bowel resections. Upon hearing that, even I wondered why they're just doing it again rather than trying something new this time but hey, I'm not a doctor nor do I play one on TV. Bailey stresses that Mrs. P is a single mom and that she and her son are special and will get the highest level of care and anything they need. Mrs. P (played by Samantha Mathis, who is one of those actresses that blends into any role she plays to the point where I never recognize her until someone points her out to me) is embarrassed but Bailey assures her she means it and Alex adds that they'll take good care of Jackson. He goes back in to help out the prep while Bailey and Mrs. P talk.
Jackson wants one of the lollipops that Dr. Kenley has in his pocket but despite his best deal-making efforts, he can't convince the doc to give him one. As he argues, though, Kenley loses his train of thought and then keels right over. Alex yells at Jackson to press the code blue button and Miranda and Mrs. P run back in to find Alex working on Dr. Kenley and Jackson inexplicably clutching a handful of lollipops. That is some of the worst continuity ever, given that they were clearly in Kenley's pocket when he fell and Jackson didn't grab for them, yet the camera does a loving close-up on the candies anyway, highlighting the mistake.
Bailey finds Richard and tells him that Kenley died of a massive heart attack. At the news, Richard goes kind of slack-jawed. Bailey talks about how someone should speak to Kenley's wife about what an honored colleague he was with all of his decades of service (see? Because then we know that he's been there all along and is an important character after 30 seconds of screen time) but she finally notices that Richard isn't even hearing her. After a moment, he just turns and leaves.
Izzie has decided it's time to tell her living boyfriend about her dead one. The dead one is sure this is a horrible idea, but Izzie wants to be fair to Alex -- after all, Denny knows about Alex. Denny hates it and would off Alex if he could... I can't believe I'm actually typing all this right now. Sigh. Anyhow, she's happy when she's dating both of them and asks Denny if he wants her to be happy, which is what he wants more than anything in the universe. He points out that Alex is going to think she's a whackjob, but she thinks that since Alex said he loved her, the least she can do is be honest. "I love you." "I'm having the best sex of my life with a ghost. He's both not you and not real." Yes, I can see that it's a good tradeoff.
Alex apologizes to Jackson about his doctor dying, but Jackson could give a crap -- kind of like all the rest of us. He's more interested in getting Alex to sign something, because, "I want to get a wish from the wish people." He needs a doctor's signature, but Alex won't do it. Jackson is undeterred and points out that Alex could help him choose from the list of wishes, which include things like going on a trapeze, or to a rodeo. He sulks when Alex refuses, and in his patented version of comfort Alex replies, "Dude, the rodeo smells like horse crap. You're not missing anything."
Callie tells Mark she's got a parathyroid tumor for him to remove, and Lexie jumps in because she just loves her some tumor removal. She does actually seem genuinely more excited about the tumor than about working with Mark -- I'll hand it to her that for the entire hour I got that it was all Mark's problem, his uncontrollable lusting after her. Callie says it's fine while Mark tells her it's not, but when he sees Callie's look he tells Lexie it's fine as long as she touches nothing. Lexie leaves and Callie totally calls him on sleeping with her. He tries denying it only for a second, and then admits that he was weak against the whole "teach me" thing. He admits that Derek will kill him but can't seem to go along with Callie's simple solution of not being alone with Lexie. Callie asserts, "Hey. You? Are a professional." Sadie then comes up and seductively pulls some lint out of Callie's hair which turns her into a spacey, mushy mess, and Mark has to remind her what she was just saying about professionalism. After Sadie walks off the two older docs watch she and Lexie and whisper about how the interns are out-of-control stalkers. Mark expands, "Sexed-up stalkers." Oh, the pot and kettle of it all... But despite my jabs, these two and their natural chemistry even in a comedic b-story are what saved this episode from getting a solid "D" from me this week. Their scenes are the awesome bright spots.
Arizona Robbins -- an extremely peppy Jessica Capshaw -- is the new pediatric surgeon who happened to be available to start a new job on 5 minutes notice. She introduces herself to Bailey but immediately ends up on Bailey's bad side by wondering why Kenley kept up a course of treatment that wasn't working. Bailey stands up for the deceased doc and protests that they hadn't turned the corner yet, but Arizona counters that Jack's case is severe. Bailey icily corrects her that the boy's name is Jackson, and it's apparent that this will be a long first day for poor Arizona. She tries to smooth things over by agreeing to do the procedure that day but that afterwards if it doesn't work she'll look for other options. She then excuses herself to take care of Kenley's big, invisible caseload, turns the corner and zooms off on those tennis shoes with little wheels in the soles. Do they even really make those shoes in adult sizes? I'm not buying it. We get it, guys -- she's young and CRAZY.
Eric is still moaning about the pain in his legs, and Hunt comments that it would be better if they could get him off the board. Given a sympathetic opening, Mere points out that Eric has decreased feeling in his leg, but Derek says that's just what he's saying, and he could be saying anything. Eric asks for more morphine and Cristina chimes in that they aren't there to feed his drug habit, though Eric reminds her that the drug traffic in solitary is rather slow. Meredith wants to wait and look at the films to see what could be causing his pain, but Derek and Cristina think it's a waste of time and Hunt can only glance furtively from person to person. A tech then comes and puts the debate to rest by delivering the films, which show that Saintly Meredith is right -- he's got something long and stabby-looking lodged in his spine. Eric is delighted because if he's paralyzed, his execution date for the following week could possibly be postponed but that gives Derek a reason to work his hardest to make sure he's in working order to be put down. Hunt continues to do nothing but look troubled.
Bailey finds Patricia putting a bit "Do Not Disturb" sign up on a door to what I think is one of the operating rooms where Richard is apparently hiding out. Bailey insists she needs to see him, but Patricia just explains that ever since he heard about Kenley's death, he wants to be alone. Bailey's put out and just stares at the door. It's riveting TV.
The docs all look at Eric's x-rays, but they can't tell if the stabby item is going through his spinal cord. Mere and Cristina snipe at each other about a CT vs. an MRI, and Hunt futilely tells them that they will look at both. Derek orders that they are going to do everything by the book so that a lawyer can't try to stay Eric's execution by saying he didn't get the proper standard of care. Hunt is surprised that Derek is pro death penalty, but Derek corrects that he's "pro-punishment." Meredith simpers that good people do bad things, and Cristina rolls her eyes. I'm sick of Cristina being so passive aggressive -- it's not like her -- but I do agree with the eye roll. Mere continues that they don't know what he did and can't judge, but Cristina gets the last word that a jury can judge and that they put him on death row. Hunt is all about only making an array of surprised and worried facial expressions and looks incredulous, while Derek is pissed that they're even debating the issue. He spits instructions at them and the girls flounce off. Hunt comments that he thought they were friends and Derek says that they were, but that now the men are just in for a very long day. Aren't we all.
Alex and Izzie are joking around about Mere and Cristina getting a murderer; Alex muses that one might try to hire him to off the other. Izzie laughs and points out that actually, they will probably do it themselves. Alex admits that it's weird that they are fighting, which is nice to finally have one of their peers point out. Izzie decides that now is the moment come clean, and preps Alex that she's about to tell him something that will sound weird. He asks, exasperated, if she's breaking up with him but she immediately assures him it's not that. She tells him that she sees Denny a lot lately. Alex admits that it sounds like she's nuts, so she asks if Alex ever saw his dead grandma. I have no idea how she would pull a parallel between Alex's grandma and Denny the Sex Machine, but I suppose at least she's trying? Alex did in fact talk to his grandma, who showed up in a dream to remind him not to play with himself. I... I did not expect that. Neither did Denny, who looks horrified. Izzie tells Alex it's kind of like that and Alex brushes it off and tells her to say hi to Denny. After he leaves, Izzie freaks out a bit while Denny tries to get over the whole grandma dream.
Meredith asks Eric if he's feeling better, which sends Cristina into even more of a snit than before. She stomps off and Eric calls her a bitch, "Not to use coarse language..." Meredith unconvincingly recites that she is her friend and they had a fight. He's still in a lot of pain and Meredith asks what it is in his back, since that knowledge would help them treat him. He explains that it's probably a toothbrush that someone snapped the head off of and then melted down to a point. Mere asks how it got in his spine and he smiles, "Got in a fight with a friend." He then chuckles maniacally.
Izzie is walking around the halls like she actually has things to do when Jackson calls out to her from his room. He tries to trick her into signing the form by asking her opinion about what wishes sound cool. When she mentions the rodeo, he sadly replies, "Some guy says it smells like poo." That guy comes in the door just then demanding to know what Jackson is up to and points out that he's not even eligible since he's not dying. The doctors rib him good-naturedly about his fake-dying and Izzie leaves so Alex can prep him for surgery. Outside the door she stops to look worriedly back at her living beau. Denny tells her that Alex knows, so she should stop worrying. Oh sure, like anyone would really have any idea what crazy Izzie is actually living based on what she said earlier. But Denny isn't just dead, he's now annoying and selfish, so of course he'd say that.
Mark, Callie and George are in Margaret's room so Mark can tell her that she's got a tumor in her neck. This prompts more yelling at the ceiling so George jumps in to explain that the tumor is benign and easily removed, explaining that it has been telling her body to leech calcium from her bones and that's why she was having so many breaks. More yelling at the ceiling ensues, and despite George assuring her this is good news, she's not having it. Turns out she fell in love with a guy who had to move to Denver and asked her to go with him. But because Denver is icy and she might fall, she couldn't move. She's wrecked that a tumor is to blame for her losing the love of her life. Lexie then comes in to deliver labs and unwittingly tortures Mark some more while Callie tries to get him to focus.
There's no good news to be had in Jackson's OR -- once they've worked on him he'll have hardly any bowel left. Bailey jumps in and tries to be optimistic, but Arizona points out that the bowel is dead and his liver is cirrhotic, so they can't save anything. Bailey stutters but Arizona cuts her off to announce that Jackson should have been put on a transplant list long before this, and it's a miracle he's still alive.
Bailey is up in arms at the news and bursts into the Chief's sanctuary to complain. He's in scrubs, lying on a bed in the middle of a darkened room. He warns that he's not seeing anyone today, but she insists it's important. He counters that every conversation he has is important. Ignoring that, Bailey forges ahead to rant about Arizona being too young and rash and how she's just giving up and throwing Jackson on the transplant list, ignoring the last three years of treatment. One could argue that Arizona actually trying to, oh, save his life, but Bailey is feeling too wronged to notice that. Her argument isn't all selfish, though -- she nearly cries when she talks about how tough Jackson has had it and pleads to have someone assigned who can handle the case. The Chief calmly reminds Bailey of her past. "You thought Shepherd was a haircut. You didn't like Hahn. And you think Dr. Sloan is a 'hussy.' Can you name any attending that you thought was good?" She tries to cover by telling him she likes his work but he's not in the mood. He explains that Arizona was the top of her class and chief resident, and is the best anyone has seen in a long time -- just like Bailey. Also, she's the only choice they have so Bailey has to deal with it. She gapes at him a moment and then storms out. I will fully admit that maybe I'm more annoyed by this because I'm annoyed by the show as a whole right now, but I feel like even Bailey is acting uncharacteristically stupid. She is a doctor who should be able to see the facts about treating this kid but she's just ignoring it to try and be all rosy and happy, and she should be better than that.
Cristina is angrily sharpening a pencil like it's Meredith's finger in there. Hunt brings her a coffee and she angrily asks what it's for. Hunt thought she needed a friend, but she just declares that "Colleagues aren't friends, they're competitors." It's the first thing she's said that sounds like genuine Cristina and not weird angry pod-Cristina. He figures he'll take the coffee, then, but she immediately grabs it, and he smiles. Derek comes up and announces that Eric has brain contusions on top of everything else, and Mere appears to ask if they can give him more morphine. Derek refuses, and when Mere suggests that it's inhumane, he announces, "No, killing people is inhumane. Denying painkillers is a judgment call." Cristina smiles to hear Meredith get smacked down by her boyfriend. Mere runs after him to demand to know what's wrong, and he spits that he tries to save lives all the time and loses, but that Eric just takes life away and has the nerve to suggest they are two sides of the same coin. I think that if Derek didn't believe that to be true, he wouldn't be losing his mind right now. Meredith argues that they aren't, but Derek only reasserts that Eric doesn't need morphine.
Mark and Callie are lying in bed in the on-call room, but unlike most couples in there, they are totally clothed and actually just talking. Mark is lamenting how great the sex was with Lexie and how they also talked and laughed for hours. It sounds like he really has never had that whole "talking" thing with a woman before and I'll hand it to Lexiepedia -- I wouldn't have guessed her to be the first woman to reach that milestone. Callie, on the other hand, can't have another "romantic disaster" in the hospital, and Mark agrees that her track record is rather impressive. They sit up while trying to figure out something else to think about and try kissing each other, but it's not working. Callie then decides that, since they are addicts, they need a 12-step program. Mark isn't into it at all: "I'm not going to a meeting to discuss my obsession with my best friend's girlfriend's half-sister." But his best friend's girlfriend's ill-fated one night stand's ex-wife assures him it will be just the two of them as each other's sponsors. And she realizes it's pretty much only one step: "Don't get naked with an intern." Mark goes to write it down.
At lunch, George is talking to Cristina about Izzie's birthday, clearly to help give ideas to Alex. Alex actually has it under control, though, on account of the boyfriend lessons. When Izzie gets there Alex cracks a horrifically bad joke about sharing his girl but not his expensive sandwich and Izzie looks uncomfortable -- I can't tell if it's on account of Alex joking about her ridiculous situation or if it's because the joke was just that bad. Mere comes up and George leaves, so she takes his seat. They talk about Eric some and Izzie wonders what he did. Cristina throws out that maybe he caught his wife with someone and killed them, but Izzie matter-of-factly informs her that's a crime of passion, and they forgive crimes of passion. Saintly Meredith counters that all crimes are crimes of passion, you don't kill someone because you forget for a moment that it's illegal, and as I choke on my water Cristina leaves. Sadie then takes that musical chair and Izzie asks slyly, "When you kill her, is it going to be a crime of passion?" Wow, for a split second, there was the old Izzie who I actually enjoyed watching! Sadie asks if they are still fighting and when the answer is yes, asks if Mere wants to know what she thinks. Mere sing-songs that she doesn't in such a condescending way that I'm really surprised everyone doesn't just yell in unison for her to give it a rest with the various holier-than-thou crap this hour.
Cristina finds Hunt and tries to complain about her day, but he cuts her off to say he's working and leaves. Oh, the strikes are just piling up against him today.
The ladies are back in with Eric, who says that he is feeling better due to whatever Mere gave him. Cristina glares and makes a beeline for the chart like a kid realizing she just caught her older sister in a juicy lie and can now get her totally busted with mom. Meredith asks if he has family they can call but Cristina cuts off to say they can't call his family, but Mere wants to know what he did. Mere protests, but Eric thinks it's a fair question. In a light voice that might be describing the clouds in the sky, he tells them, "One Monday, I slit this woman's throat." He then liked the feeling so much, he did two more each on Tuesday and Wednesday before getting caught and thereby ruining his killing three on Thursday. For the alliteration, you know. He then asks them if he can have some jello, but is met with silence as they both stare. It's the first time each has stopped glaring at the other all hour.
Derek takes his turn ignoring the sign to go talk to the Chief. He pulls up a chair and tries to say how sorry he is about Kenley's death and how it must be hard for Richard. Richard just announces how much he hated Kenley, who was good with kids but a horrible co-worker who he won't miss for a moment. Derek asks what the whole dark room is about then -- his own mortality? Richard actually has the gall to laugh at the idea, but why is that out of the realm of possibility? Kenley's death rendered the Chief of Surgery useless and unresponsive to his staff. Richard then tells him he's not worried about himself dying, but about the hospital dying. When he made calls to replace Kenley, no one wanted the job. Seriously, unless I am somehow grossly misinterpreting the timeline, Kenley died unexpectedly and Arizona was there the very same morning. How on earth does that constitute no one wanting the job? I'm amazed someone could fill in even for the day on that short notice. But we're meant to see it as another sign of how bad Seattle Grace is right now. Also, Richard became basically comatose the second Bailey told him about Kenley. So when did he have time to make these mystery calls in between that and the mounting of the "do not disturb" sign? How hard is it to write a storyline that isn't completely implausible, timeline-wise? He rants about all that's wrong with the hospital, AGAIN, and laments the number twelve ranking. JIMINY CHRISTMAS, WE KNOW. TWELVE. Try DOING something about it already, then, but don't make me recap another scene like this one! Richard moans about failing at the one thing he worked on his whole life and concludes, "So I'm going to stay right here on this table until I find a way to walk the halls without cringing." Here's an idea: How about figuring out how to run your hospital and control your staff, and earning respect rather than sulking? The staff is only going to get worse if the Chief runs away when he doesn't like the way things are going. Derek just listens and pouts, and Richard asks if he's going to give a rousing speech about getting back on the horse. Derek says he has to work on a serial killer later. "I don't have a rousing lecture in me." With that he sits back so they both can pout about their lot in life.
Mark and Callie are scrubbing in for Margaret's surgery and discussing their intern strategy, which includes no looks over their shoulders and sending the interns with the tumor to pathology as soon as possible. They agree and bump elbows for morale before going in.
In another OR, Derek and Hunt are scrubbing in for their own surgery. Hunt can't believe the girls still aren't speaking and figures the surgery will be like two hours in an ice cave. Derek: "Working on Seattle's 'Man of the Year'." Hunt says that they have each other, and can talk about the Seahawks if necessary. Derek throws out the idea of just getting a beer while Mere and Cristina do the surgery themselves. It's not a bad one, honestly.
Izzie decides to try being more clear with Alex. She chases him into an on-call room and explains that her seeing Denny isn't like a dream, that instead she sees him when she's awake and they hang out. Well, in a very liberal definition of hanging out, yes. Alex guesses that she's just freaked out because he said he loved her, and Denny appears to admit that she is freaked out. Izzie just forges ahead and finally admits, "I see him and we have sex." I was going to say Alex is being willfully dense but seriously, who could believe that? He figures she is just fantasizing about Denny and while he wishes she was fantasizing about him, it's fine. Izzie is totally surprised that he doesn't care and she's definitely being willfully stupid to not press the issue because Alex obviously doesn't understand. He points out that when people die, the living get messed up by it. "Iz, I've been competing with that tool for a long time." Denny makes a face at the insult but Alex continues, "But I'd say he's kinda got the handicap now." He asks if Denny is there and then starts to kiss Izzie, asking if Denny can see. He seems to not hear as Izzie turns and tells Denny to go -- she's a little breathy as Alex's head has disappeared from the bottom of the screen. Denny's ticked off, but he does actually leave so that Izzie can have sex with an actual human.
Derek pulls the toothbrush out of Eric's spine and comments smoothly that it's no wonder he was complaining. Cristina jumps in to excitedly to rat out Meredith and the extra morphine, which of course ticks off Derek. Cristina tells them what Eric did and Derek thinks the girls shouldn't even be on the case. Meredith asks what could he do, jump off the table and get them? She sneers, "You're the one holding the knife." This episode has gone way beyond dramatic strife to just watching people being shitty to each other for way too long. It's not fun viewing. Hunt tries to change the subject by asking if anyone has done a somethingorother procedure. Meredith hasn't but would love to try, while Cristina has done it on cadavers and wouldn't need to "try." Meredith smoothly counters that medicine comes to some people naturally while others have to practice. It's probably the outright cattiest comment I've heard out of her mouth ever, and Cristina is totally stung. I still don't think it's like Cristina to be so affected, though, since she knows she's the best and a fight with her best friend wouldn't be enough to change that. Every doctor in the hospital has admitted she's the best, so why is this suddenly a dagger to her heart? Or rather, a toothbrush to her spine? Derek looks surprised at just how bad they've gotten and Hunt keeps his head down for a while and then asks about the Seahawks in a horribly clumsy change of subject. The look on Cristina's face clearly says it's over for him.
Izzie is in bed and honestly, I don't know why she bothers to wear clothes to work anymore with the amount of time she spends naked in the on-call room. She puts Mark well to shame. Denny admits that he's jealous, and Izzie is sorry but begs him not to make her choose, because she can't. He tells her that she knows he can't do anything that would make her unhappy, and she sits up and tells him she loves him. "That's what you tell all the guys." Ha! She doesn't respond to the dig and instead says that it's her birthday and asks if he's going to get her a present. He tells her sadly, "I think I just did," while Melancholy Izzie music plays behind them.
Alex and his intern are watching Arizona as she makes a note in Jackson's chart. Bailey walks up as Arizona shakes her head. His test results are bad, and he needs to be put on the transplant list immediately for both an intestine and a liver. Bailey jumps in to ask for a second opinion, so Arizona pulls out a paper and stonily writes a name on it. She hands Bailey the name of someone at Johns Hopkins and says when he tells Bailey that Jackson needs a transplant, she needs to do it. Bailey gets defensive and says there's no need to snap, but Arizona (rightly) tells her that there is. She calls Bailey on second guessing everything Arizona has done and said, and reminds her that this is about Jackson and that if they waste any more time he won't live. I'll give her this -- Bailey takes it like a man and everything she's just been told clearly sinks in.
Cristina and Mere do some more ignoring while they scrub out, and Cristina stomps off to the elevator. Hunt sees her and does his very best Worried Face before going and asking if she's okay and wants to get a drink. She turns on him and asks if they're on again because it suits him, because she's a sad little girl who needs a friend? He stutters and she plows on to say that she can usually deal with his being hot and cold but she can't today. "Just leave me the hell alone." She then storms into the elevator and the doors close on a baffled Hunt. I hate this Cristina. I want her bite back without the giant chip on her shoulder from being so very wronged.
Sadie ambles down the hall towards Meredith, pausing to look into Eric's room. She asks what he did but Mere says it doesn't matter -- it was really bad and he's going to pay. Sadie asks gently if she wants to get a drink but Mere declines, although she's genuinely nice this time as opposed to her lunchtime attitude. After a moment, Sadie says that the two of them had a fight like this one. Mere seems not to remember so Sadie reminds her that they had a huge fight in Amsterdam, and that they made up but things were never the same between them. Sadie assures Mere with some badly mixed metaphors: "I'm a rolling stone. I bounce." But, she says, Meredith is about to do the same thing to Cristina, "And that girl mates for life." Mere argues that she apologized but Sadie asks if Mere meant it, clearly knowing the answer. She then tells Meredith sadly, "I miss you. As my friend, I miss you." If she'd been anything more than a loose cannon with no real backstory, maybe I would care more about that touching line. But... I don't.
Bailey, having swallowed her pride, is telling Jackson and his mom about the transplant. She's trying to control her tears as she assures him he has an awesome new doctor and that someone at Johns Hopkins thinks she is the best. Bailey then takes Mrs. P out to sign some forms, leaving Alex and Jackson together. Wordlessly, Jackson pulls out the wish form and hands it over to Alex, who signs it immediately. Jackson then says, "Stars and x's," and Alex sits down on the bed so they can go through the list together. Alex is so wasted on stupid Izzie.
Margaret is out of surgery, and Mark tells her it went well. In a croaking whisper she asks when she can get out, and George asks her if she's eager to get home. "I'm going to Denver," she croaks, while the doctors contemplate her bold decision.
The interns are all at Joe's while Mark and Callie sit at the bar and try not to lose control. They figure that if they stay strong, don't get drunk, and keep staring at Joe, they'll be fine. Joe, having death rays bored into him by two crazies, is totally scared. Callie chews on a toothpick like it's responsible for all of her problems, but Mark just glares. After a moment he announces, "You only live once, you can't waste it." As Callie tries to talk him out of it, Mark apologizes, "Sorry kid, I'm going to Denver." Callie calls after him but it's futile, as he has a word with Lexie who then grabs her coat like the building is on fire and runs out. Callie looks over at Sadie and chants, "Dammit! Dammit dammit dammit!" She does a shot and then immediately has Joe pour another. I guess that all of this means she's decided she really is fine with being a lesbian after all?
Bailey heads into the Chief's cave and admits that Arizona is a good doctor. Her voice catches as she goes on to say she's not sure her patient will make it, and Richard sits up and sighs. I think it's supposed to be that he's ready to go on, but it comes off like he's annoyed with Bailey for caring. Either way, though, he pulls down the sign. Mere's here to wrap things up. "We don't wish for the easy stuff. We wish for big things. Things that are ambitious. Out of reach." Bailey hands over Jackson's chart, and they sit down to go over it together.
Derek gets home to find Meredith sitting on the couch, and she gives him a tired half-smile. He sits down and takes a deep breath before admitting that two men shot his dad for his watch. His mom had saved up for it, and his dad refused to give it up so they shot him. "We are supposed to treat everybody the same, but they are not all the same." Mere tells him she's sorry but adds, "It's just a bad day all around, I guess." Hang on a second, is she likening her fight with Cristina to Derek's dad being gunned down? I can't tell if she's being totally self-centered or is so exhausted she can't absorb anything. He nods, and I can't tell if he realizes she's exhausted or realizes that she has no capacity for sympathy. He tells her he wishes that he could make the situation with Cristina better, and that he tried to think what Cristina would do in the situation but he doesn't know. Mere admits that Cristina would turn the music up loud and they'd dance it out. You're forgetting the tequila! That said, she thinks Derek wouldn't want to go that far. However, Derek's ready to show a little glimpse of his old self, back when he really was McDreamy, and he gets up to turn on the stereo. He pulls off his jacket and yells, "Woo! Yeah! Look out!" He then tells her to get up too, since he's not dancing alone. She's embarrassed but he just starts to dance like someone's dad while mugging at her. This is not enough to make up for three seasons of condescending jackassery, but I'll admit it's really cute and made me and my friend giggle against our will. He then pulls her to him and kisses her.
"We wish because we need help. And we're scared. And we know we may be asking too much..." In another magical room that seems to be downstairs at Mere's but where music isn't playing, Alex pulls foil off a plate to unveil a lopsided pink homemade cake for a delighted Izzie. He warns that the cake tastes funny, but the frosting is good," and then lights the candle with a lighter. Denny is in the doorway and has to admit, "It's a nice gesture, him baking for you." Alex tells her to make a wish, and she asks him, "What if I have everything I could ever want?" A boyfriend who doesn't yet realize you have some sort of medical or mental condition? Hot dog! Okay, I'm being mean -- I can't blame Alex at this point for not understanding just how messed up things really are. Mere VO's, "We still wish, though." Alex suggests she wish that nothing changes. Mere finishes, "Because, sometimes, they come true." Izzie blows out her candle and sends the room and the episode to black, with all of her twisted, unbalanced wishes having come true.
Is it just us or has this show gotten straight ridiculous? Take a look at our Grey's Anatomy: Dramatic Malpractice gallery for a countdown of its most annoying plotlines.