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Mud Bowl redux! Except not, because ain't nothing ever going to be like Mud Bowl was. But Coach doesn't care, because there's nothing he loves better than watching his boys play football in the rain. This is the Panthers' last game before State, and it's a slippery mess of a Texas toad strangler (see? I learned!), but Coach tells them to have fun out there, and they do. J.D.'s father has told him to keep the ball on the ground because of the rain, but J.D. keeps putting the ball in the air. He makes a bunch of risky plays, Joe is in the stands freaking out per usual, but it works out in the end. It is probably just dumb luck that it works out, but it does. On the way to get something to eat after the game, J.D. is chatty and happy because he's fifteen and doesn't see what the big deal is whether it was luck or skill. But as the family walks through the parking lot in the pouring rain, Joe tries to "have a talk" with his son. When J.D. finally wakes up and resists his father, Joe completely loses it and starts wailing on the kid. Luckily (!) Coach and Tami are inside the restaurant; they see what's happening and rush out to help, their leotards and capes merely implied. Katie and J.D. go to the Taylors' that night. Joe McCoy last seen walking glumly out of the Applebee's parking lot in a downpour.
Mindy's crossed into the "My Special Princess Day" zone of wedding planning, and instructs Tyra that she WILL throw a tea party for her bridal shower. In December. Tyra is overwhelmed by planning the party, so luckily Renaissance Man Landry is there to help her schlep tables and chairs and slice cucumbers ("a little thinner" he suggests). Despite the sudden thunderstorm of Forces of Nature (oh yeah, I just went there) proportions, and despite (or because?) the fact that the stripper attendees are named Kandy and Fashionette and such, the shower goes off without a hitch.
A high school redistricting plan has been brought up for a vote by the town. The state will funnel some money into Dillon if they split the schools into Dillon High and East Dillon High. Of course, redistricting means splitting the football team up, so the Boosters go into action with military precision, figuring out who lives where (and we're not just talking about the kids already in high school, but the kids they're scouting in elementary school even) and gerrymandering the district to keep the Panthers in tact. Coach doesn't like the sound of this plan; Buddy tells him that if he doesn't like to see how the sausage gets made, he'd best stay out of the kitchen.
Lyla's drinking a lot and playing Playstation over at The Playgirl Ranch. She wallows a while, and Tim Riggins continues to walk around being all Dream Package Hot Boyfriend/Best Friend/Committed Partner -- not only cracking awesome jokes (he calls Lyla "Beer Wolf") but trying his darnedest to get her to feel better (he takes her to church!) and then also just speaking some true wise words ("You're the best, your life will work out") and then he tells her that he's madly in love with her. It's ridiculous, but I love it. I don't see narratively straight when it comes to Timmy Riggins.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Another week, another insanely good episode, another SEASON RENEWAL YAY!!!
The Collette women and Billy are roaming around what looks like a Sears or J.C. Penney, registering for Mindy's and Billy's wedding. Mindy spies a sangria set, wants it, makes Tyra scan it. Billy says he's heading over to Automotive to see if he can register for a leaf blower; Tyra thinks that sounds like a great idea and tries to hand the scanner off to him, but Billy evades the scanner like he's a secret Communist. Tyra's mom wants to know why Tyra is so testy, it seems like Angela's the only one excited for Mindy's wedding. Tyra confesses she's worried about her S.A.T scores. Angela sort of uselessly tries to assure her daughter that everything will be okay since she's been working so hard. Mindy calls them back to the task at hand, and then demands Tyra tell her what the bridal shower plans are. Tyra's called all her girlfriends and Seven Senoritas. Mindy jumps in and says they can't go to Seven Senoritas, they always go there, she wants something special. Tyra cracks that it will be special when her girlfriends buy her new thongs to replace all her old ones. Oh, old thongs. That's ludicrous. (Ba dum dum). Mindy brainstorms, by basically looking around her and settling on the first thing her eyes land on -- she wants "a tea" because she is standing right in front of a tea set. Angela thinks that sounds square, Mindy pleads that it's not square, it's "classy." Tyra snarks about her sister not having any class, but Mindy just tells her that her bridal shower is going to be a tea. "Make that happen." Billy comes running back holding a leaf blower and tells the ladies to check him out. The camera pulls back and we see Billy holding the leaf blower engine down by his hips, the four foot tube extending and pointing up right on up into Mindy's tea party.
Football field. Madison hangs out by the fence watching J.D. hit receiver after receiver. Coach gives the boys five, and J.D. runs over to talk to Madison. She juts her chin out and tells him that he looks pretty hot out there. J.D., goofball, confirms that, "yeah, it is pretty warm out there." Coach notices what's happening and sends Wade over to get Romeo back over to practice. Wade apologizes to the "little lady" and drags J.D. away. Coach catches J.D.'s eye and tells him: "On your own time. This is my time." J.D. apologizes and that's how a normal man deals with a boy who's getting a little too hot under the waistband.
Lyla and Billy are playing some kind of race car video game (and I wish I could tell you what they are playing, but I have HIGH HEELS in my closet). Lyla wins amidst much screeching. Mindy is psyched, she declares that she used to think Lyla was prissy, but it turns out she's kind of fun. Billy says he wants a rematch, and Lyla takes a swig of beer and slurs, "You can havearematch" and then asks for another beer. Tim gets a little judgey, stands up and declares he's turning in. Lyla says she's not coming, and then says "G'night Grampa." She and Billy start playing again, Billy sort of sits on her and Lyla cackles and drunks, "Yooouu can't wiinnn" and I don't care what anyone says LYLA FOREVER, SHE IS SO AWESOME!!!!!
Credits. Morning at the Taylor house. Tami is going over some papers to do with a redistricting proposal to be discussed at a meeting that night. Coach says they bring it up every year, it never happens. He wants to know where the cream is. Tami thinks people are really fed up and the redistricting might really happen this time; it's the only way they'll get any money from the state. Coach says it would just cause confusion, and people don't like the confusion. Cream? He asks again and Tami tells him that they're out, but he can have a sip of her coffee, "It's real good."
The Playgirl Ranch. Tim tries to wake Lyla up: "A'right Beer Wolf." He climbs on top of her and tells her that she has to get up now for school. She moans that she's not going. Tim suggests he stay home too: "You won't get much sleep, though." Whoa. Can make Teen Wolf jokes AND be virile? Very impressive. He tells Lyla that the train is leaving; when she doesn't even respond, laying like a lump under the covers, Tim looks concerned and a bit confused.
Grocery store. Tyra's on her cell phone, her cart piled high with crap, assuring Mindy that she's getting everything she needs for the shower. She grabs a cucumber, and a whole bunch tumble to the floor, she hangs up the phone. Landry appears and walks over to her, joking that security has asked him to escort her from the premises. Tyra laughs -- and she is just so often NOT believable as a teenager, this laugh is totally adult in some weird way -- and explains to Landry that she's planning the bridal shower from hell. Tyra asks Landry how he's doing, in a kind of forced way, like she just remembered she was supposed to ask him about himself. Landry says that the bar asked Crucifictorious back for another gig, and suddenly Tyra kind of looks like a teen again; she listens to Landry and says she's happy for him and the band. Tyra starts to end the conversation, without asking Landry for anything for once. But she is obviously a Foucauldian mastermind, because she doesn't actually need to exercise her power in order to get things: she produces desires in other people to fulfill her needs for them. When Tyra says she needs to learn how to make scones, Landry says that his mom has a recipe, that maybe she could use. Tyra asks him if that was, like, an offer of help, and Landry realizes that it was. Tyra breathes a sigh of relief and tells him that would be awesome.
McCoy household. Joe gets off the phone with Wade, who's told him that J.D. hasn't been giving his all in practice. Katie doesn't believe it, but Joe, two notches south of "livid" says that she's better believe it, because J.D. is being distracted by a "fifteen year old minx named Madison. That girl is a plague." Katie's like "Oh, please." Joe can't believe that Katie doesn't think its a big deal that J.D. snuck out the other night; Katie says she does think it's a big deal, but that she doesn't think it's worth totally freaking out over. She hisses that her husband needs to "back off." J.D. walks in and teens around a bit -- ignores his mom, goes to the fridge. His dad asks him how practice was, and J.D. says it was fine: "Practice was practice. I've got it under control." Then J.D. asks his mom what's for dinner and she tells him turkey burgers. J.D. gets all bright-eyed and dorkily over-excited about this and then heads upstairs to do some homework. This poor kid. Joe sashays past Katie, repeating what J.D. said sarcastically, "He's got it all under control. 'It's all good.'" Katie's eyes are wide with foreshadowing.
Matt and Shelby put Grandma into the backseat of the car. The ladies are going to the market, and there's lots of chatter coming from Grandma. She doesn't want to go right now, she's missing a life makeover on Oprah! Grandma, the great thing about life makeovers is they are never over, they are constantly in need of redoing. It's sort of the point. Shelby starts to back up the car, but as she does, Grandma suddenly gets panicked and confused, wondering where her purse is. Before Shelby can bring the car to a full stop, Grandma has opened the door to the moving car to go get her purse, and pitches onto the ground. She cries out in pain, Shelby and Matt run to her. Matt tries to comfort his grandmother, she cries -- and it is clearly as much as in confusion as in physical pain. Which gets directly to the heart of senility or Alzheimer's, that terrible stretch of it when the person afflicted fades in and out, and feels the strain of that fading in and out.
Commercials. Hospital. The doctor comes out to talk to Matt. He tells him that his grandmother is fine, with mainly just some scrapes and bruises. But that isn't really the issue, he notes. Her mental health is really deteriorating. The doctor reminds Matt that they've discussed other living arrangements for Lorraine. Shelby jumps in and asks the doctor what he means, exactly. The doctor says that Lorraine needs twenty-four hour care. Shelby is a little slow here, wanting to clarify that he's saying they should be looking into assisted living facilities for Grandma. Matt snaps awake and shouts at his mom that they aren't looking for anything, that just because Grandma fell out of a car, "That YOU were driving" doesn't mean she needs twenty-four hour care, it means "YOU need to pay better attention." Shelby tries to diffuse the situation a bit, but suggests to Matt that they consider what the doctor is saying. Matt plays the You Abandoned Me card and suggests that if Shelby wants to bail she can go back to Oklahoma. "Right now, Grandma has a home, and I'm taking her to it."
Buddy pulls his truck up to the school and calls Tim Riggins over to the car. "We need to have a little man-to-man." Tim gets in, and then cut to Buddy's truck slowing down on an empty side road. Is Buddy going to murder Tim Riggins? Just when the storylines were all so solid, are we going down the murder road again? Tim is prattling about State until Buddy tells him that he knows they're not there to talk about football. Buddy asks how Lyla is doing, and Tim tells him that she's hanging in there. Buddy confesses that he doesn't know what to do, that he needs to get Lyla back, can't stand that he's hurt her, and misses her so much. Tim tells the vulnerable man that he knows Lyla misses him, too. Buddy allows a note of hope into his voice, and it is super sad to hear: "You know that? She said that?" Tim lies and says that she did. I mean, maybe she has, off screen, but Lyla has not done anything recently that I've seen to indicate that she is ready to say she misses him. Tim tells Buddy that he needs to give Lyla more time. Tim has apparently been going to night school for a degree in Life, because he is TELLING US ALL HOW IT IS recently. Buddy pauses and then says (I shit you not, this is literally what he says): "That's good, Tim Riggins. That's good advice. You're a good man."
School meeting. A pant-suited lady explains the redistricting proposal. They would divide the community using Collier Avenue -- a straight north-south road through the middle of Dillon. Once divided, the two schools would have capped class sizes and more per-student funding and all that jazz. Question and answer time; lots of Waiting for Guffman style "hububhububhubbub" noise-making from the crowd. People are concerned. Most concerned, though, is Coach and one of his assistant coaches, standing in the back: "What's this mean for the team?" Indeed. A very fancy lady in a silky shiny shirt stands up -- she's PTA President -- and asks Tami what her opinion, as principal, is. Tami stands up and stutters a bit about how it's a complicated issue. She gets her voice a bit as she expresses her real opinion -- that it does look like in order to get any state money, they need to consider the redistricting plan. Cut to Coach and Tami walking to their car afterward. Coach asking his wife whether she realizes that half his team lives east of Collier Avenue. Tami simply responds: "Mmmm hmmm." Coach mutters about how redistricting would mean those players would be playing for the East Dillon "giraffes or whatever they'll call themselves." Tami: "I know." Coach opens the door for his wife, who just exhales, nods, and looks at him and says again, "I know."
Lyla lets herself into the condo; Buddy isn't there. She gathers some more clothes, and then goes through the mail. There's a letter from Vanderbilt. You can't read the expression on her face quite straight; Buddy walks in and keeps his excitement at seeing her in check. He asks if they can talk, and Lyla looks at him sternly and says they can start with him congratulating her for getting into Vanderbilt. He does, but she follows it up with a whining, "Too bad I can't go" and then storms back out of the door. C'mon, Beer Wolf, seriously. They're called student loans. Get some and then get a work study position. Quit being quite so dramatic. God.
Commercials. Madison finds J.D. in the library. She flirtily tells him that his father called her parents last night. J.D. is immediately, earnestly concerned. But Madison just continues on, powered by the emptiness of her soul, lightly telling him that basically Joe McCoy told her parents that she was a slut. She's not worried though, she's not, like, in trouble or anything. She wonders if J.D. thinks she's a bad influence, too; he just tells her that she's amazing. She smiles through the whole thing, and then throws her arms around his neck and kisses him. She's not mad, she's amazing, right? Oh, Madison.
Tyra and Landry load rental chairs into the back of Tyra's pick-up. Landry is wondering why Mindy thinks it's a good idea to have a party outside in December. Tyra's phone rings, she answers, it's clearly Mindy micro-managing. Landry grabs the phone from Tyra -- because Tyra has NOT been going to school to get a degree in Life and she can't even handle a crazy stripper bride (well, I guess when you put it that way, maybe she is doing the best she can). Landry greets Mindy and then deadpans, "Landry. Landry Clark? Yes, you do, you know exactly who that is, that's not funny." He tells her that they've got it under control and then hangs up the phone. Landry Clark to the Rescue!
Applebees. The boosters are crowded around a table with a map, working hard on a project. It's all very "Chuck! Order in some Chinese!!!!" Except they're at Applebees. So they just order a bunch of failure piles in sadness bowls. Basically what they're doing is figuring out which football players live where, and trying to gerrymander the districts to keep the Panthers together. As becomes clear, they're not only considering kids on the team currently, but boys coming up through, like, Pop Warner. Joe McCoy sits at the head of the table presiding over it all. Coach comes in and talks to Buddy, who explains that he need not worry about the gerrymandering, everyone -- even the superintendent -- is on the same page, and will do whatever it takes to keep the team together. A waitress brings over another pitcher of beer, announcing that here's the beer Buddy ordered. Joe yells down from the end of the table that she might want to run his card, he heard Buddy's last tab was a doozy. Buddy comes right back at him, joking that that was the most expensive lap dance he's ever had. Everyone guffaws, but the look on Buddy's face is one of the reasons we watch this show; there's a whole other layer to what's going on than the dialogue. Buddy may be putting on the (red) face of a Man's Man right now, but his heart hurts, he can't joke about what he did because it's fucked his whole life up right now. For his part, Joe McCoy looks over the tops of his reading glasses, seemingly realizing that, despite his jolly ol' boy response, Buddy is not in the mood to joke about it, and also understanding that Joe has him in his power because of that.
Saracen household. Grandma is watching television while Matt's at the kitchen table doing homework. Grandma calls to Matt, asking him where her slippers are. They're on her feet, and Matt chuckles and tells her as much. But she starts getting more desperate: "I need my slippers, Matthew." She needs them, she needs them now. Matt tells her they're on her feet. She screams: "WHERE ARE MY SLIPPERS???" and Matt gets up and goes to her, telling her once again that they're on her feet. But she keeps shouting, and then she starts to cry about needing her slippers, and she's rocking and desperate and pleading until Matt whisks them off her feet and puts them in her lap: "Here they are. Is that what you need?" She calms down and whispers thank you. Matt stares into the middle distance.
Oh, this is heartbreaking. One of the very first things to fill my soul about this show was when, in the first episode, the camera panned down to Grandma Saracen's slippered foot tapping the linoleum floor. It was like nothing I'd seen on television -- a real house, a real grandmother, real slippers, you know? What was so wonderful was how seriously the show takes THINGS -- not only in an art-directed way, a way to convey realism (though that is important also), but in the way that the show demonstrates how people live in worlds defined by certain things (the Taylors' house, the linoleum floor in the Saracen's, the duct-taped TV at the Riggins'), and how people relate to one another through things. And, so the thing about Alzheimer's, in my own experience, is that one of the final gestures of resistance people make is to insist on the importance of THINGS. They need to know where their purse is, they need to have the right pair of slippers, they go over and over with you the recipe that they have for quick clam chowder. Because they can feel themselves slipping away, and the only way anyone can figure to tether themselves is not to other people, necessarily, but to the THINGS that kept them in the world the whole time anyway. And so, this is why this scene truly makes me sad. It is telling us something not only about how terrible it is to have someone close to you slide into that ether, but it is telling us something even larger than that, about how we all stay connected in the first place.
Tyra slices cucumbers to Landry. He glances over and tells her that she really should slice the cucumbers thinner. And, also, probably tomorrow, right? Who wants drippy cucumber sandwiches prepared the night before? Landry jokes that he probably just lost some man points in lecturing her on how cucumber sandwiches should be delicate. So then he just blurts out, "Have I told you I'm in a band now?" And Tyra tells him that that's like "forty thousand man points right there." I get so nervous at any WHIFF of a relationship between these two. It's like the Friday Night Lights quality litmus test. Is the season any good? I don't know, are Tyra and Landry together? Tyra tells Landry that she got her S.A.T. scores back, and then shows them to him. He compliments her for going up like a hundred points. Tyra isn't too pleased, she felt like she needed to go up more. Landry asks if he can tell her something: he is proud of how hard she's been working for this. Most girls that look like her don't have to work for anything. Uh, except for tips? Tucked into their g-strings? Tyra accepts his compliment and then jokes "You still think I'm good lookin' though right?" and Landry stutters and jokes about how she's okay.
Coach and Buddy are on Buddy's car lot for some reason. Buddy shows Coach a car he's been trying to sell for eighteen months, but that won't move off the lot. Coach interrupts Buddy and tells him that he doesn't like what's going on with the Boosters and redistricting. Buddy tells him not to worry about it; Coach says he doesn't want to NOT worry about it. Buddy tells Coach that this is all a lot bigger than Coach, this is about the Dillon Panthers. No one is going to stand by and watch the Panthers get dismantled. So if Coach doesn't want to know: don't ask. I have to confess that I don't totally get what the big deal is about gerrymandering the district is. Obviously, it has a distasteful quality about it, but what, exactly, is the big deal about keeping the team (in its current and 5-years-down-the-road manifestation) together?
Tim has taken Lyla to church. Just like on American Idol. It's her family's old church. They go into the sanctuary to sit down; the choir is practicing Christmas carols (because the episode did originally air in the winter). Lyla thinks Buddy put Tim up to this; he denies it. Lyla is not feeling the spirit; Tim says he just thought it might cheer her up. Lyla gets up and storms back out; out in the hallway, Tim catches up to her, and Lyla turns to him and gives us a bit of a smarmy performance. She wonders -- with head shaking preciousness -- what she's doing there, in Dillon. Why did she let her family go? Now she's all alone, and she has no family. Tim quietly tells her that she does have family, she does, and then wraps his arms around her.
Commercials. Landry and Tyra set up white tables and chairs out on the back porch. They lay out place cards that read "Kandy" and Sugar" and "Charm." Landry mutters that these cannot be these women's real names. A wind kicks up suddenly, and within five seconds, it's lightening. They scramble to get all the stuff inside as it starts pouring. Cut inside, where all the tables are set up in the living room. Landry's stayed just long enough to see all the strippers arrive, and then takes his leave, Tyra telling him thank you for all his help. Cut to a bit later, the bridal tea lubricated, apparently, with plenty of whiskey going into those porcelain cups. Mindy's opening her presents which are all lingerie and sex costume related. These ladies are smart; they can probably write these gifts off on their taxes. Mindy decides to make a toast; she tells all her friends that they are the best, and then turns to Tyra, puts on a baby voice, and tells her that even though Tyra is the baby sister, she's always looked up to her. Everyone "awwwws" in unison, and Mindy goes over to her sister and whimpers, "I love you, Ty Ty!" Mindy then tells Tyra that maybe if she's lucky, one day she'll find a man almost as hot as Billy Riggins. This one liner gets all the ladies screaming, and we cut to bridal shower stripper dance party, full of whiskey being poured into cups, and various lingerie gifts draped around girls' heads and such. Tyra just sort of looks on in bemusement.
Pouring rain, night time. The McCoys pull up in their S.U.V. outside the locker room. Joe is lecturing an only half-paying-attention J.D. about playing in the rain. Joe instructs J.D. that he needs to focus on ball control; basically demanding that J.D. keep the ball on the ground tonight. J.D. is like okay, okay, I get it. Katie tries to diffuse the tension by brightly telling Joe that they get it, when it rains the ball gets slippery. Joe dismisses her with a laugh, and then repeats himself ten more times to his son before J.D. gets out of the car.
Slammin Sammy Mead declares, once again, that this is a real "Texas toad strangler", and it is seriously coming down out there. Coach is at the center of his players just before the game start and he hoarsely shouts at them that this is what they've been waiting for -- this is the semi-final game, the last game before they go to State -- and that this is a beautiful night for football. And, we all must recall how much Coach loves playing football in the rain. He sends his boys out onto the field all fired up, and we cut to the second quarter. It's sloppy on the field, the ball keeps popping out of hands. J.D. takes a snap and launches the ball into the air, a beautiful pass to Matt who catches it inside the ten. Everyone cheers, except Joe McCoy in the stands pissily noting that J.D. just got lucky. Tim Riggins runs the ball into the endzone, and the game is tied.
play, J.D. launches another long pass, but this time it's intercepted... and for a touchdown by West Cambria. Cut to the stands where some strange guy is shouting about how you don't throw in this mess, keep it on the ground, take the running lanes. Joe McCoy notices this man expressing his own rage at his son, and then starts yelling at his son down on the field to use his head. But down on the field, J.D. has a way better daddy. Coach calls him over and tells J.D. that they're sticking with their plan. "We're down by seven. Game hadn't even started yet!" He tells J.D. to protect the ball, keep his head up, and, importantly, have some fun out there. "It's a beautiful night out here, son!" Up in the stands, Joe McCoy is stewing, Katie is telling him that J.D. is just doing what the Coach is telling him to do. Back on the field, another long pass that goes incomplete. Another sloppy play, J.D. fumbles, and West Cambria recovers. Folks in the stands boo. play, Tim Riggins launches through the offense to bust out the quarterback; he knocks the ball free, picks it up and runs for a touchdown. Panthers are down by one, and there's 33 seconds left on the clock. Coach? What're you going to do? Remember, now, you are on a television show. "GO FOR TWO!!!" Coach declares.
Joe McCoy is pissed in the stands, he wants to go for the tie. J.D. takes the snap and gets in trouble, has to scramble, what'sgonnahappen what'sgonnahappen?!?! He scrambles some more and then passes the ball once again (even though Joe's in the stands shouting "run the ball!") and Tim Riggins catches it in the endzone. Panthers are going to State! In the stands, Katie celebrates, while Joe scowls.
Shelby waits for Matt to come out of the locker room. He approaches slowly, and dismisses her football game small talk. He tells her that he's sorry for what he said, and that she was right. "I don't know how to take care of Grandma anymore." She says they can figure it out. Matt tells her that he doesn't want her to leave; and Shelby says she was never going to anyway.
The Taylors make their way through a crowded Applebees. Cut to the McCoy S.U.V. J.D. is in the back, having a hilarious teen boy side of a conversation: "I know! It was cold! It was crazy. It was like playing on a slippery slide or something. What? You better stop or you're gonna get it!" Joe growls, "Get off the phone." J.D. ignores him. He repeats himself. J.D. ignores some more. Joe bursts out shouting, "HANG UP THE PHONE!" Katie gasps and tells him to relax, J.D. gets off the phone finally, eyes wide. They sit in silence.
Applebees. Tami tells Coach that she heard that the whole redistricting thing? They're changing the line so it zigzags all over. She wonders if he knows anything about that. Coach just tightly says, "Nnnn nnn." Tami exclaims some more, and says she thinks it's probably all about football.
Parking lot. The McCoys get out of the car, Katie pleasantly exclaiming over the Texas rainstorm. She and J.D. have their arms around each other under the umbrella. Joe tells his son to hold up, he wants to talk to him for a second. Joe tells J.D. that it was a pathetic display tonight. J.D. finally stands up for himself, incredulously asking "Pathetic display? I got us to State didn't I?" Joe gets in his face and tells him that he got lucky. The conversation escalates, Joe telling J.D. it's like he never played a day of football in his life. J.D. gets right back in his dad's face, telling him to go call Madison's parents again. Joe yells that he will, "boy," until that tramp stops coming around. J.D. tells his father to screw off, and that's what pushes the button. Joe grabs his son by the jacket and pushes him back toward the car. Cut inside where Tami has caught sight of what's happening in the parking lot. She tells Coach to look, and they both rush out there, Taylors to the rescue! Meanwhile, father-son pushing has turned into father-getting-his-son-on-the-ropes. Joe pushes J.D. back into the car and starts full on PUNCHING his son. Katie is screaming for him to stop stop stop, until Coach runs up and drags Joe off of J.D. J.D. looks at his dad with hurt in his eyes, Joe wanders off into the storm, Tami takes the women and children under her wing.
Commercials. Lyla and Tim arrive back at The Playgirl Ranch. Tim is pumped about how awesome the game was; Lyla wonders why he isn't going out to any parties tonight. Tim says that the real parties happen when they WIN State. And then also, he says, as he sinks into the couch with a beer, he kinda likes "hangin' with my gal." And here is where the critical part of my brain CHECKS OUT. I don't care if it is unbelievable, or if it's corny, or if it's dumb: I LOVE IT. Tim tells Lyla that she's not having a lot of fun over there; Lyla tries to deny it, but Tim tells her that she's been pretty down recently. Lyla says that she doesn't know what she was thinking, that she would move in there and all her problems would be solved? Tim sits up a bit and tells her that he's not there to solve her problems, but that he's there to support her no matter what choices she makes. He acknowledges that her dad threw her a curve ball, but that the self-pity has to stop. She's better than that. He thinks that she can get into any college she wants. She points out she can't afford it, and he tells her there's scholarships, and then if that doesn't work, "San Antonio State and I would love to have you." Lyla looks thankful and then Tim asks, "Did I just say I loved you?" Lyla shakes her head no, and so just in case the folks in the back didn't get it, Timmy brings this scene home by declaring, "Cuz I'm kinda madly in love with you. And I'll be here for you no matter what." Lyla tells Tim that she loves him, too, and they start making out.
Over at the Taylors, Katie looks a mess. I applaud Janine Turner. I feel like she is kind of making this role into something bigger than originally intended. She whispers to Tami that "he" just pushed J.D. so hard. I like how he's a "he" now. Tami tries to comfort her, but Katie can't get over that "he" hit her baby. She doesn't know what to do; Tami tells her that she's not going to do anything right now. Just drink her tea and leave it be for right now. Outside, Coach talks to J.D. who is full of sweet teen platitudes, "Nothing I do is ever good enough. I can't take it anymore!" Coach quietly tells J.D. that he understands. J.D. says he doesn't want to see his father again, he doesn't want to go back to the house, he hates it. Coach tells J.D. that they aren't going to do anything about anything tonight, that he and his mom will have to figure something out but not tonight. J.D. warbles, "Is it my fault or something?" and Coach quickly tells the kid that what Joe did was wrong, "That's just wrong. Whether it's your father or not." Coach assures J.D. that it'll work out, but nobody seems very convinced by that.
The bridal shower has wound down, Billy is sashaying around wearing a red satin bustier that (presumably) Mindy received as a gift. They slap asses and yeehaw out the door, leaving Angela and Tyra in afterstripperparty mayhem. Angela's wearing a sweet lowcut apron over her lowcut dress, and sighing over somebody just sticking their gum right on the table. She looks up and notices that Tyra is teary, and goes over to her. Tyra, crying, asks her mom, why she can't just "want that" -- gesturing toward the door Mindy and Billy just walked out of. She says that "they" just seem so happy, whereas here she is, wanting and trying to go to college, and having it seem more and more impossible. Angela grabs her daughter's hand and says that she wants to tell her something. She says that she loves Mindy; she was her first baby and she was always so funny and darling. "But, you know, she has never surprised me, not one day in her life, bless her heart. But you? You surprise me, honey." Oh, this is so good. Angela is not a good mom, and this is not a redemption scene. This is a character showing us that she pays attention, she knows who her daughter is, and she loves her. But we all know that love actually isn't really "enough" when it comes to raising kids -- which is why this scene plays very true and really does a nice job reaching in and pulling Angela out of the stock character bin. She tells Tyra that she is "a wonder," she has no idea what's going to happen for her, but she does know, that "you are going to have everything you are dreaming of. You are going to get everything you are reaching for. And I want you to keep going, keep reaching." They're both dissolved in tears, and we end on the two Collette women hugging and saying, "I love you."