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Wooo, football's back! The depressing simmer of last week comes to a big, awesome, rolling boil as everyone just stops looking glum and starts kicking ass. Matt Saracen steps up to Smash, who has been soaking up the spotlight pointed in his direction ever since Coach McGregor started emphasizing the running game. Smash tells Matt to suck it up and let him have the attention during this, his final year, but losing Julie and losing face on the field is too much at once for Matt. After Smash gets called on to make the game-winning play, Matt just up and decks him on the field in the midst of the celebration. Even given the Panther win, the damage McGregor is doing the team is more than obvious, as at the end of the game all our key players -- Smash, Matt, Jason, and Tim -- are alienated from and angry at one another. Buddy Garrity takes advantage of this turn of events by beginning to orchestrate Coach Taylor's return to Dillon. He first frames it as being about the team, but when that doesn't work, he points out to Eric that his family is falling apart without him. This is a truth we get to see firsthand in an insanely awesome sequence that began building the minute Julie bitchily instructed her mother to leave her alone by informing her that "her" baby was crying in the other room and that culminates with Tami literally dragging Julie out of a makeout session in The Swede's van at three in the morning and slapping Julie straight across the face. Possibly needing a slap across the face are Tyra and Landry, who keep their murder-fueled romance percolating, even going so far as to start indulging in some gallows humor. Okay, you crazy kids! Tim -- drunk, dehydrated, and a little bored -- decides to accept Lyla's invitation to attend a service at her megachurch (which resembles nothing so much as an ADD gamer's convention to me). Tim looks like he might be moved by the preacher's words, but that could also just be the beer burps he's got. Either way, he shows up in Lyla's bedroom afterward to confess that he thinks he felt God's presence in him, and Lyla falls for it until he leans in for a very unchaste kiss. Anyhow, Tim Riggins need only run his hands down his stomach if he wants to feel God, youknowI'msayin? Having struck out with his "I feel God in my pants tonight" line, Tim decides to go with a pissed off and alienated Jason Street to Mexico for his experimental Hollywood Upstairs Medical College surgery. So to recap the recaplet: Tyra's effing Landry, Tami's slapping Julie, Eric's coming home, Timmy's shirtless once again and heading to Mexico. Oh, show. You know I never doubted you. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Landry gazes at Tyra sleeping in his bed in the early morning light when the alarm clock goes off, the ever-arousing sound of Slammin' Sammy Mead jolting both of them awake. Tyra looks at Landry with a furrowed brow and just mutters "Landry?" Landry responds by saying he's sure whatever she wants to say will certainly be "practical" and that it will ruin what was the most perfect night of his life. Tyra tells him that "this" can't happen again and that she'll see him "in school. I'll see you in school." Then she climbs out his window. Classy. Noting the classiness is Landry's dad, who is around the side of the house taking out the trash. And one hopes that is not supposed to be some sort of pathetic fallacy.
Across town, Tim Riggins gets out of bed wearing nothing but his bare chest and a pair of shorts that certainly have pie weights hung from the bottom they're hanging down so low. Mmmmmmm. I mean, for the pie of course. "Mmmmmm, pie" is what I mean. Tim gets a peek out of his window and sees his brother kissing a be-robed Jackie goodbye after a long night of, uh, pie eating?
The Taylors lay in bed with Baby Grace between them. Eric tells his wife he has to get going, and she says "Well, that sucks."
Eric stops to pick up breakfast for the road. The radio plays, and we hear the local commentators talking about Coach Taylor as "he who shall not be named" and "Judas." A woman hands Coach his to-go order and apologizes for the radio. He just shakes it off and heads out to his car. Where Matt Saracen catches up to him in order to "apologize." Coach wants to know what he's saying sorry for, and Matt explains that it's because he and Julie broke up. Coach tells Matt he didn't know that they broke up -- which just adds insult to injury for Matt; he's not even important enough for the news to have reached parental ears? -- and he stutters, trying to make excuses that Julie probably just doesn't want to bother Coach while he's down in Austin. Eric looks perplexed as Matt walks away.
At practice, New Coke McGregor is giving Tim a hard time again, making him run back and forth in front of the other players while holding a truck tire over his head. He shouts a variety of things at Riggins -- "candy ass" "whiskey breath" "dirty-haired attitude" -- and then tells him to praise the game of football. The rest of the team looks on in complete fear of Coach "Alberto Gonzalez" McGregor until their attention is diverted by Tim Riggins keeling over on the field. The assistant coaches start calling for a trainer but McGregor keeps yelling at Riggins to get up. Cut to the paramedics loading Riggins onto an ambulance.
Credits. Tim lays in an emergency room bed looking sorry for himself. A doctor comes in to scold him about being completely dehydrated, his body wearing out. He says they can't get hold of Billy to come sign him out, and Tim snarks under his breath that his brother is probably screwing his ex-girlfriend. Tim can't leave without an adult signature, and the doctor asks if there's anyone else he can call. Tim says no, which, like Tami's not knowing anyone but Glen to give her a ride home from the hospital smacks a little of disingenuousness. Hey! Maybe Tim should call Glen! As the doctor turns to leave, he shows himself to be a big, fat, dumb Glen himself, turning to Tim and asking him if he's ready for Friday night. Tim responds like the hot robot he is (Again with the band names Tim Riggins inspires me to concoct. Last week it was Sexy Mischief. This week: Hott Robot.). Anyhow, Tim responds like a hot robot: "Always, sir."
Lyla saunters in, and Tim says he feels better just seeing her. She suggests he try going to practice without a hangover, "I hear its a totally different game." Tim replies that that's what he's afraid of, which is quite a witty remark for a Hot Robot often engaged in Sexy Mischief. Lyla tells him she's just there as a friend and reminds him that he helped her with her dad the other night. She pauses and Tim knows she's got something to say. She tells him that she thinks he should come to her church. He smirks and asks if this is some recruitment scheme. Uh, I think yes. Evangelical religion is exactly that, a recruitment scheme. Lyla tells Tim that she thinks he's lost and that's exactly how she felt. Tim says he isn't lost, "This is Dillon, home of the Panthers." Lyla responds, "You can be lost in Dillon, you know." Looks like you can be totally cheesy in Dillon, too.
Jason is back on the Quad Rugby court, kicking ass to anonymous and terrible rap metal. Cut to Herc giving Jason a hard time about being a cliché. He chuckles incredulously, "Experimental surgery in Mexico?" and then tells Jason that, a year after his injury, he's right on time for the "miracle surgery portion of the show." How cleverly, meta, show. Here, also, is a grain of salt for you to take with yourself. Jason is all optimism about the results they're seeing in rat hind legs. Herc reminds Jason that he doesn't have hind legs. But then, in all seriousness, Herc tells Jason that people will be able to sniff out his desperation to walk again. They'll take his money and what's left of his dignity. He tells Jason not to ever say he wasn't forewarned.
I'm recapping online right now and notice as we go to the scene that The Ponys' "Double Vision," which was originally playing in the background, did not get licensed for the online version. Can we please solve this nonsense yet? Why can't they get all this digital rights shit sorted out? Anyway, The Ponys. Great band. Chi-town independent represent! I especially love how they are helping bring the '90s back (Long blonde hair on the lead singer! Female bassist!). I am on board for this project. Yesterday I found myself donning a slip dress and little jazz-shoe-esque oxfords. Parisian '90s chic!
What am I talking about? Okay, so TMU football field. Eric has an exchange with a quarterback where he 1) tough-talks the kid and then 2) reassures the kid. The Eric Taylor Special! Cut to inside, where Eric goes over plays with the other coaches. He mentions "the height problem of course" of presumably the kid he was just coaching on the field. He has a few ideas for how to work around the height, but the head coach is just like, "Let him go." They have a bunch of other players waiting in the wings that don't have height problems. I love how "college football is sooooo evil" this storyline is. Always tryin' to screw the little guys. Some folks are just not cut out for the bright lights. And so on.
Cut to outside, where Eric calls Tami to tell her that he's having a bad day, getting "the distinct privilege of cutting one of the kids from the team today." Tami apologizes and we see she's standing in her kitchen with Glen, who is wearing a Standard Issue Guidance Counselor Short Sleeved Dress Shirt. The look popularized by Matthew Broderick in Election. Glen asks if she's tried "turning it off and then on again." Tami is like, "Yes, Glen." Coach overhears his voice, and Tami tells her husband Glen is trying to help fix the icebox. Coach retorts that he "doesn't want Glen in my house with his hands in my wife's icebox." Don't worry, Coach. Glen is so jittery I think it's safe to say his hands haven't been within five feet of any iceboxes in at least a year. Tami doesn't acknowledge her husband's ridiculous request. Coach continues, wanting to know why she didn't tell him that Julie and Matt broke up. Tami says they didn't and then Glen pipes up to say that "Yuh huh, they did. It's all over the school." Coach tells Tami to tell Glen to sit down and be quiet. Heh. I love Glen. Tami tells her husband she didn't know and then quietly accepts his bitchy insinuation that Julie's silence on the subject is a problem that she should have been tuned into.
Dillon Panther football. Smash is getting interviewed and turning on his thousand-watt smile. He tells the press that the big difference this year is McGregor's emphasis on the running game, i.e., on Smash. He third-persons that "Smash is in the zone like never before." Matt looks on glumly. A teammate asks Matt to say something to Smash about his grandstanding, and Matt says he will.
Tim is still in the hospital. I guess he's been there all day long. Buddy Garrity comes in and signs him out. What is Buddy up to? We find out as we cut to the car ride home in which Buddy goes on and on about how McGregor is doing wrong by his players. Stuff about the hot, blazing sun, extra-long practices, et cetera. Tim interjects that he thinks he passed out not because he was overworked but because he was hungover. Buddy then pulls the car over, stops and looks Tim Riggins dead in the eye and instructs the boy to never say that again. Buddy has seen Tim Riggins play with a hangover many times, and he did so like a champ. Heh. Tim is so morally confused.
Matt catches up to Smash in the football field parking lot and tells him that some of the guys are mad because Smash is acting like he's the only player on the team. Smash is like, "Oh, some of the guys, huh?" Matt reminds Smash that they are both supposed to be leaders and they should act like it. Smash excuses himself, saying that it isn't his fault that McGregor is emphasizing the running game. Matt tells Smash he just needs to act like the captain, because "you are THE captain." Smash seizes on that and accuses Matt of being pissed just because McGregor made him the captain that year. Smash is frank. He tells Matt that he's loving all this. He's a senior, and this is his recruitment year. Matt's turn will come year. Smash for President! He's pretty convincing in that scene.
Smash leaves Matt to chew his cud like he does, and Matt spots Julie getting into The Swede's van.
Tami knocks on Julie's door, bringing her a basket of clean laundry. First of all -- and let me just get this out there right now -- if you are sixteen years old and your MOM is still doing your laundry for you, well, you are...uh, lucky? One thing you are not, however, is my future child. Sorry, (imaginary) sweetie. Tami is laying it on thick, trying to "chat" with her daughter. Oh, I heard you broke up with Matt Saracen. Oh, who broke up with who? Oh, are you doing okay with that? Julie is not having any of this, giving only tight-lipped, bitchy replies and angrily flipping the flimsy pages of her textbook. (A textbook! OMG!) Tami tries to be all supportive and tells Julie that she can always talk to her. Julie says "thanks," and she looks sweet for a minute. That is until Grace starts crying, and Julie reveals herself to actually be evil incarnate. To her obviously at-wits-end, post-partum mother: "I think your baby is crying." "Your" baby. Holy shit, that is the coldest thing I have ever heard.
Tyra walks by Landry, who is sitting with a bunch of geeks. She can't help but look at him with a little smile on her face, and he notices.
Football practice. A slightly annoying scene where we just have to listen to Jason sunnily tease the players as they saunter onto the field -- a little "gentlemen!" here and little "cha cha cha!" there. McGregor comes over and seems to approve of Jason "Mr. Phil" Street's positive coaching approach and tells Jason they need Riggins to bring his best game on Friday, so could Jason go talk to Riggins to "pump him up?" Jason is pleased with himself that he seems to be making inroads with McGregor
Jason shows up at The Playgirl Ranch and calls loudly for Tim to come to the door. Inside, Tim is lounging with a beer and some TV and takes his time getting up. Jason tells him he was missed at practice, and Tim fake-furrows his brow and says that it was just doctor's orders. Jason wonders if the doctor prescribed the six-pack, and Tim breaks into a goofy grin (swoon) and says, "Naw, that was me." Jason shakes his head in disappointment. Tim asks if Jason is there as a friend or as a coach. Jason calls Tim a screw-up, and then Tim tells Jason that if he's going to choose, he should choose "friend" over "coach," because he makes a lousy coach. Jason gets pissed and tells him to clean up and show up to practice, and Tim yells after him sarcastically that the fire under his ass "has been LIT!!" Jason tells Tim to go to hell.
At the House of Latina Spitfires, a.k.a. The House that Rosie Perez Built (formerly known more simply as Matt's House), Matt calls awkwardly to "Car-Low-ta." He says he's noticed a trend where everyone in the house's laundry gets done except for his. Which means Carlotta is doing her own laundry and the laundry of her client. Not Matt's for whom she does not work. Seeing as he is sixteen and all. And should be doing his own laundry, GOD. CarLOWta wonders if Matt expects her to do laundry because she has brown skin. She explains that she is a nurse, that she came to America from Guatemala to study to be a nurse, and that she is not a maid. She is a nurse, Glen. There's also some forced "chemistry" here where Matt tries to "charm" CarLOWta but it's kind of grody so let's just not speak of it.
At the Landry household (what's his last name again?), we get to take a peek inside another perfectly art-directed lower middle class home. Landry's mom and dad are also exceptionally well cast. Landry's dad asks his son how school was and then tries to pry into his son's social life, wondering if he's making any new friends or meeting any girls now that he's on the football team. Landry stonewalls him and diverts his attention to some crackers he's unloading out of grocery bags. God, being part of a family is so embarrassing sometimes. His dad is effectively diverted by the crackers -- "Oh that is sin in a box" (did that line come off a little Fire Island to anyone else?) ["Now that you mention it, it does sound a bit Beverly Leslie." -- Joe R] -- but quickly lasers onto the only other thing besides Sex With Tyra that Landry really does not want to discuss: his murderous rampage. His dad asks him where his watch is, and Landry quickly lies that he just got it cleaned so it's in a drawer now. Dad simply notes that he's happy Landry is taking care of the family heirloom and that his grandfather will want to see him wearing it when he comes to visit in a few weeks. Grandpa's visit looms!
TMU. Eric answers his cell phone, and it's Buddy on the other line. Buddy desperately wants to arrange a meeting with Eric. He won't tell him why because if he did, Eric wouldn't come. Eric notes the illogic of this proposal but then agrees to meet Buddy halfway between Dillon and Austin. Could this be the beginning of a new love triangle? Ew. Sorry.
Billy comes home to find Tim in the La-Z-Boy with a beer. He snipes at his brother: "Another productive day at the office, I see." Tim cuts to the chase: "Are you screwing Jackie?" Billy admits that they have been seeing one another and that it's actually pretty serious. Tim starts to storm off and Billy asks if he really thought they could have a relationship together. Tim turns to his brother and says "Why not?" Billy yells, "Cuz she's a 33-year-old woman and you're a 17-year-old kid. You can't even take care of yourself, how were you going to take care of her?" Tim stomps out of the house, obviously really hurt by Billy's pointing out of the obvious.
Tim does some drunken squinting at the road as he drives, and contemporary God rock starts fading in on the soundtrack. Cut to the interior of a megachurch where people are rocking out, Lyla included. She seems kind of lonely in there, worshipping among strangers. Tim wanders in, looking, yes, "lost." He finds his way to Lyla among the hundreds of clapping and singing people. She beams when she sees him and makes room for him to stand to her. The preacher goes into a sermon about asking Jesus for forgiveness and being able to shed your past. He talks about immorality and how that can all be erased. Maybe Landry and Tyra could benefit from this kind of church. The camera ranges around on folks doing that raised palms thing, and the preacher talks about how "God is going to touch you tonight." Hey, remember when Timmy told all the football players that they were going to "touch God" on the field that season? Looks like he had it backwards. I guess I kind of liked it a little better when it was backwards. The scene continues with lots of church.
Matt and Smash are at work, Smash is just at the counter talking up a lady while Matt slaps some burgers together. Matt bitches at Smash to get to work, and Smash smarms back that he is working. Matt bitches some more, and Smash tells him they need to "get the healing on." Matt is not placated.
Landry and Tyra are looking at watches. Tyra holds one up, and Landry says there is no resemblance at all between it and the Tell-Tale Watch. Tyra steps to the side and poses in a sort of melancholy loveliness. Landry tells her she doesn't need to respond to what he's about to say. He tells her that if the Tell-Tale Watch is found with the body, he'll be implicated and that he promises he won't drag her into it at all, that he'll do everything to keep her safe. Okay that's taking it to an extreme there, Landry. Your plan is to keep silent on the whole "manslaughter" thing, choosing to not inform anybody Tyra's key role as the originator of this whole dumb situation? Not to be outdone in the "taking it too far" department, Tyra responds by turning to Landry and saying, swear to God, "Well I figured I could always kill ya to keep you silent." What? The? Fuck? Landry tells her that the comment was creepy and they laugh.
Lyla is in her room wearing decidedly unChristian underwear. I don't think there is a square inch of sensible cotton on the girl; it's all lace and sex. Tim pushes open the door to her room, and she freaks and reaches for a robe. He's acting kind of drunk in this scene. She tries to shove him out of the room, and he asks her for two minutes. Then he says that something happened to him last night at church and that it's hard for him to understand the feeling. Lyla does the Smug Smile of the Convertor and takes hold of his hand. Tim continues, telling her that it allowed him to feel a part of something -- part of people, part of Lyla, part of God. He's scared of even saying any of this. Lyla hugs him. Anyone with eyes can see where this is heading. Tim asks if she felt it, too. She nods and says she always feels it. I guess the problem here is a difference between Tim's and Lyla's definitions of "it." As in, I don't think Lyla's "it" lives inside men's pants. Tim leans in and kisses Lyla on the mouth, and she shoves him back. She spits, "What are you doing?" and Tim responds with confusion, saying he doesn't know what he's doing, just that being with her makes him feel closer to God. It's a fucked-up enough sentiment that it gives me hope that we'll get a goodly number of episodes more of Timmy NOT being a Charley Church. Lyla can't believe what he just said "You feel closer to God when you're with me?! Did you think that line was gonna work on me?" She orders him out and he leaves. That was a great scene.
Buddy is telling Eric that McGregor is tearing the Panthers apart. Buddy is acting like a seventh grader, and it is awesome: "I think there's something wrong with that guy. He's MEAN!" Eric wonders if Buddy isn't just mad at McGregor for personal reasons. Buddy tells Eric that he could have his job back if he wants. Buddy is clearly harboring delusions because he says that he is not going to get rid of McGregor (as if he could) unless he knows Eric is coming back. But then Buddy pulls out all the stops and tells Eric that he has seen Tami, trying to be brave and strong, and he's seen Julie "walking around in things she shouldn't be wearing." I like that, that we can track the Taylor Family fortunes by the scandalousness of Julie's tube tops. Eric is fidgeting in his seat listening to this spiel. Buddy closes with a proposition: "If you could go back in time and make it so the TMU job never happened, would you?" Oh, TV Gods, why don't you give viewers such choices?
Tami is pissed in the way that parents of bad teens can only be pissed. She spits into the phone, "Jules? This is your mother, it's past two o'clock in the morning and you had best call me as fast as you can."
Over at The Swede's, Julie is getting some firsthand experience in how ridiculously stupid stoned people are. And, just like any sixteen-year-old worth her salt, experience with wanting to be just as stupid as them. The Swede declares that "vampires are real" and that the moon is not. The girls giggle in the face of such imaginative prowess. Girls, if you think that is clever, wait until they start wondering whether or not the whole universe can fit onto the head of a tiny piece of rice. A joint is getting passed around while another guy posits that there's only one world government, and Al Gore is the commisar of it all, and The Swede makes a timely-for-2003 comment on how iPods have a mind of their own. Julie chews on her lips, and at first I thought she was just thinking to herself how sweaty and gross and dull all these idiots are, but actually it turns out she's just thinking hard on how and when to jump into the Drum Circle of Dumb. She passes on the joint and then jumps in: "Then there's the whole 'global warming' thing which is just a big, giant illusion created by the EPA who are out there strangling polar bears with their bare hands." Wait, what is this game? I clearly don't understand it, because as she was going on I thought, "Oh, no, she's showing how young she is because what she is saying sounds like something her parents would say, and twentysomethings are definitely NOT into what parents say." But then they all laugh and laugh at her comment, and The Swede looks longingly at her like she's a novelty gas station attendant shirt he just unearthed at the local thrift shop. So then I think, "Oh, maybe they were cataloguing various, weird things Ann Coulter has said." But I don't think Ann Coulter has commented much on iPods, so, honestly I don't know what this game is these kids are playing. Clearly I need to roll a joint and soon if I ever want to know.
Julie and The Swede are making out big-time in his van. Tami catches sight of them and runs out to the van in her robe. She bangs on the window, her eyes glowing like a tigress's, and shouts, "Get in the house right now!" Julie refuses and begs The Swede to take her somewhere. The Swede realizes he's caught between a minor and her mother (much worse than a rock and a hard place) and tells her he can't, "that's kidnapping." He neglects to specify "emphasis on the 'kid'." Julie and her mom are both rapidly spinning out of control. Julie yells that she's not getting out, and Tami opens the door and starts dragging her out of the van by her leg. Julie is shrieking now, "What are you DOING?!?" Tami gets her daughter out of the van and yells at her that she is not grown up yet, not rid of her yet. Julie yells "Go to hell!" and Tami opens up an arm and slaps the asshole straight across her face. They pause, realizing how far over the edge they both are, until Julie dramatically puts a hand to her slapped cheek and cries, "You got rid of me when you had Gracie and Dad left. You need to learn to live with that." Tami looks sincerely effed and guilty over what she just did, but I'm here to tell her that I remember all too well how very calculated were my dramatic teen declarations about various wrongs my parents had done me. Don't beat yourself up so much, Tami. Reserve the fists for your teenaged daughter. Ba dum dum.
Applebees. Tyra takes Mr. Landry's order (which, btw, is a "quesadilla burger." I can see Marge Simpson exclaiming now: "A quesadilla? And a burger? Now I've seen everything!") Mr. Landry asks Tyra if she is dating Landry. Tyra stutters and tells him she doesn't really know. Mr. Landry tells Tyra that he doesn't get it, she could date pretty much anyone she wants. "What do you want with my kid, Landry." Tyra does not say "an accomplice," instead telling Mr. Landry that his son is a wonderful guy, smart, and kind and caring and funny. She adds a little dig at the end, implying that Mr. Landry should stop thinking so lowly of his son, "You should know that, being his father and all." He absently says "thank you" as she walks away.
Friday night! Football! Pageantry and popcorn! Hooray! Every single time we get a pre-game montage I get chills all over again. We need more football. I never thought I'd say it, but I feel like there's so much that has gone unexplored having to do with the Panthers having won State and starting a new season. Slammin' Sammy voiceovers that the state champion Panthers are at the top of a mountain, and as everyone know the higher the mountain the farther the fall. We get a fair amount of establishing material about how this game is going to be all about Smash, then shots of the cheerleaders doing a Smash-specific cheer while Smash dances along with them. Matt just lurks and looks glum. Landry catches the eyes of his parents and of Tyra in the stands.
Kick off. The challenging Rattlers run the ball to the Panther 40 right away. Cut to Coach Taylor, who is listening to the game on the radio while driving toward the Panther field. I'm confused -- it doesn't seem like the weekends would be the time he gets to go home given the fact that college games generally happen on the weekend. The announcers talk about how McGregor needs to get a hold of this game if he wants to follow in Eric's footsteps. The game gets going and the Panthers make some progress. On the sidelines, Jason suggests some plays to McGregor who just brushes him off, "Not right now." Saracen is falling apart, bumbling and throwing interceptions. Smash yells at Matt to just put the ball in his hands. Matt is not receptive to his advice. Further along the sidelines, Jason suggests another play, and McGregor tells him that he doesn't have time to "take advice from the team mascot." Oooh, that is EVIL. Buddy was right, this guy is just downright mean! Jason stares after McGregor who is paying him no mind.
More football. Basically, Saracen keeps fucking up. CarLOWta is in the stands, watching with Grandma. McGregor calls Smash over to the sidelines and gives him the play, which is major egg on Matt's face. The play he called is a fancy trick one where the snap looks like it goes to Matt but it really just goes to Smash who ends up running the ball for a touchdown and the win. Everyone is happy and celebrating except Matt. The announcers narrate that McGregor just rewired the entire offense by taking Saracen out of the play completely. Coach Taylor looks on with bemused detachment. His hair is like, "Um, I don't do high school anymore?"
Smash walks toward the crowd all smiles, he approaches Matt to tell him nice job, and as he turns to keep celebrating, Matt tackles him. Coach Taylor looks on with concern, the rest of the team run to break it up, pulling Matt and Smash apart. We end with Matt, Tim, Smash, and Jason all moving in opposite directions. Get it?
Coach Taylor comes home and finds Tami on the couch. She snuggles into his chest and he asks if she saw the game. She says no but then nods when he asks if she heard what happened. Football squabbles are not forefront in her mind, however, as she sort of numbly mumbles, "I hit Julie last night. Right across the face, I slapped her." She dissolves into tears and says she doesn't know what's happening with their family. Aw, what a good mom.
Jason picks up an empty beer bottle and chucks it at the door of The Playgirl Ranch. Tim comes blearily to the door and tells him he could have knocked. Jason launches into a speech he says will put and end to their so-called friendship. Jason informs Tim that he quit the team, but not because of anything Tim said. He then informs Tim that he doesn't care about quitting the team because he's heading to Mexico right now to go get surgery and the time Tim sees him, he'll probably be walking. Omigod, Jason is being so cute. He continues, telling Tim that once he can walk again he's going to walk over there and kick Tim's ass, "because you are the WORST and the STUPIDEST friend a guy could ever have. And I pretty much hate your guts right now." This may not be what Jason Street (or Scott Porter) was going for but: ADORABLE! Squee! Jason turns and wheels away when Tim calls out "Mexico, huh?"
Landry is fiddling his strings in his room. His guitar strings you perverts! Tyra comes in the window and stands around awkwardly before leaning in and kissing him. Landry tries to talk and she tells him not to. She tells him no one's ever cared for her so much. They start making out.
Tim finishes loading Jason's wheelchair in the truck and hops in the passenger side. He cracks open a beer and offers it to Jason who tells Tim to put the beer away. Tim is like 'Uh, we're going to Mexico?" Tim asks if Jason has a map and just generally acts like exactly the drunk, goofy friend you sort of want in your passenger seat on a fun road trip. Although I'm not sure how the whole "experimental spinal surgery" thing works into the fun road trip equation.
The House of Latina Spitfires. CarLOWta is watching television when Matt comes home wincing in pain from the game and the fight. He grabs at his shoulder and she tells him to sit down for him to look at it. He sits down and she pretty much gets up and strategically places her boobs on him. Oh, this must be that new kind of experimental nursing technique they've been working on Mexico. Or Guatemala. Or wherever. She continues to press her boobs into a sixteen-year-old boy's body, then sings a little Spanish-language nonsense song her mother would sing to her when she got hurt. She explains that the song is just about how things will be better tomorrow. Lady, as long as there are boobs involved, things are already better right now.
Buddy is asleep in his office. Eric drives up and knocks on his window. Buddy mutters to himself, "yes!" and lets Eric in. Eric just reaches out and shakes Buddy's hand, saying "I sure as hell hope I don't regret this."