I should probably warn you that I'm not a regular viewer of this show. Although I think I've kept up with it pretty well just from seeing the ads. The other thing I should warn you about, and I hesitate to even mention it, but...I don't like Ben. He's smug and he always mutters. Never liked him. I don't particularly care for Noel either, mind you. But he's not as irritating as Ben. And I agreed to do this recap before I remember that Wing really likes Scott Speedman. So I'm guessing this is where Wing fires me. I'll go clean out my desk now. Sigh. ["Eh, I haven't watched the show all year, so I don't care anymore. Plus ever since I saw Speedy in Duets, he hasn't been my boyfriend anymore." -- Wing Chun]
Previously on Felicity, Zoe said she had a boyfriend, so Noel and Sean started working at her father's company. Ben whispered something that made Felicity sad, and then they hugged.
Jack Tripper and Ben are at a restaurant. Ben asks what his parents have been up to lately, and Jack says, "Nothing. And that's just the way we like it." So they're meditating together? Those are some seriously dull people. Jack says he doesn't have to be back at work for a month. All the chatter leads to Jack mentioning that he saw Lauren the other day, and he gossips: "Are you ready? She's pregnant!" Ben "um"s in response. Jack goes on gossiping that Lauren won't say who the father is because he doesn't want to be involved with the baby. Ben "um"s again. Jack says, "It's just incredible how self-absorbed some people can be," and Ben suggests that it might be more complicated than Jack's making it sound. Jack stops heaping coals of fire on Ben's head and chirps, "This is so much fun, being with you." Ben agrees that he is, indeed, fun to be with. I'm not so sure. And then he smugs us into the credits.
I guess Ben's finished quality time with his dad, so he heads over to Felicity's and asks if she'd like to go for a walk. He even enunciates! Aw, Felicity's hair is still all straight. Boo! If I wanted to see limp, untidy hair, I'd go look in a mirror.
We cut down to the street, where Felicity and Ben are strolling along, not looking at each other much. Ben asks what she's thinking. Felicity asks what he means, which seems disingenuous, and he clarifies: "About this...whole thing." Amazingly, now she knows exactly what Ben means, and admits that she's overwhelmed. Ben says that his dad knows Lauren is pregnant, but not that Ben's the father. Ben whispers, "I'm telling you, it's gonna be okay." Felicity quietly says, "You said that." He repeats that it really is going to be okay. "Yeah, I know," she replies unconvincingly.
And then Ben and Felicity are in bed. Not like that: Ben's asleep. Felicity is wide awake, though, so she sneaks out of bed and discovers that Noel is in the kitchen, making a sandwich. They chat in hushed voices, and for a second I thought that maybe whatever Ben has is contagious, and soon they all will be muttering and slurring their words. But they're just trying not to wake their roomies, so it's okay. Noel offers Felicity a sandwich, which she declines, and then she asks why he's making a sandwich at 2:37 AM. This is just a crazy theory, but my guess is that he's hungry. I admire the fact that they both have bed-head. Hee. I also admire the fact that Apple continues to excel at product placement, since Noel's Mac t-shirt is visible under his robe. Noel explains that he dreamed he was on a desert island with nothing to eat, so when he woke up he was starving. He asks why she's awake, and Felicity just says she couldn't sleep. She sits down and mopes, "I just feel like everything's changing." Noel says she'll figure out what to do with her life any day now, and suddenly he's got an idea. Shoe covers! No, wait, that's later. Noel's idea is to get the course catalog. He says it might inspire her: "You just need to find something that might be a possibility, and then you dive in. Now, if it doesn't work, then you move on to the thing." Noel opens the catalog and, apparently, is prepared to go through the whole thing, since he starts with Anthropology. "This is ridiculous," Felicity notes. Cut to twelve hours later, as Noel asks, "Zoology?" No, not really. Instead, Noel suggests Architecture. Felicity admits that could be interesting. Well, it could be, but maybe it would be a little more practical if you thought about classes you'd already taken, and then tried to figure out what majors or careers they'd suggest? That's the system my brother used, and it seemed to work out all right. Or is Felicity planning to stay in school for another four years? Perhaps she should just flip a coin. Fun fact: don't play coin-flip with € coins, as I've heard they aren't weighted equally on both sides. Noel insists, "It combines your art with your science background." And of course, her environmental engineering background. She doesn't have one, you say? Oops. I think Felicity should try to think of a career path that rewards indecisive behavior, since that seems to be her biggest strength. Noel says that Felicity could talk to a friend of his, named Adam: "He's working on a model for some contest; anyway, the person who usually helps him can't." And building a model will certainly tell Felicity whether she should become an architect. Felicity says it would be nice to have a project to do, to get her mind off things. She says that this idea helped, and then Noel gives her a bite of his sandwich.
The day, Meghan brightly suggests that she and Sean go out that night. Sean says he can't, finishes pulling a black plastic cover over a tennis shoe, and calls her over to admire it. Meghan grumpily approaches and is underwhelmed. Sean explains, "It looks like you're wearing a dress shoe, but you're not!" Well, it looks like you're wearing a black plastic tennis shoe. Meghan wonders why someone would bother with the shoe covers, and Sean says that dress shoes are really uncomfortable. Meghan proclaims this "the dumbest idea ever." She adds, "If people's shoes are uncomfortable, they buy different shoes." She should add that this is yet another invention that already exists, and that adding laces to shoe covers doesn't make them look like dress shoes. Sean asks if it would kill Meghan to support him just once, and Megan responds by asking if it would kill him to go out. He asks what her problem is, and she says, "You! You are my problem." Sean replies, "Well, right back at you." I like both of these characters, but couldn't their bickering at least be more entertaining?
Mr. Norman, the guidance counselor, is chatting with Ben and Trevor. Trevor looks exactly how I pictured him from reading Kim's recaps. I mean, exactly. That's amazing. And I have the impression that this is the Chris Elliott-ish counselor who quit and gave Noel his job, so I'm confused. But apparently so is everyone in the forums. When Noel started his new business, did this guy come back? And should he be talking to two students at the same time? It seems like there are privacy issues here. Anyway, the counselor looks over Ben's records and notes that he got an A in Organic Chemistry. Trevor announces that he got a B. Mr. Norman looks at Trevor and slowly explains, "An A is better." Heh. Ben says that they just want to make sure they're on track for med school. Mr. Norman munches on a sandwich -- sandwiches are a motif in this episode -- and says that he doesn't see any volunteer work. Huh? If the students did volunteer work, why would it be on their transcripts? Trevor is also confused, and Mr. Norman explains that volunteer work means "helping people for no pay." Hee again. He implies that when they're applying to medical schools, it's really going to matter that they did volunteer work somewhere, and I am just a little skeptical about that. Getting into college? Yeah, it's helpful. Although I managed okay without doing any. Getting into graduate school? You need good grades. And lots and lots of money. Plus, wouldn't Ben's EMT stuff qualify as volunteer work? Those guys are usually volunteers. Well, it doesn't really matter because this is all just a plot device to make Ben feel conflicted. My own theory is that Mr. Norman is screwing with the kids. Which would be funny. Maybe the kid who comes in asking about requirements will be told, "Oh, and you need to go bungee-jumping if you want to become a lawyer." The boys ask what they can do, and Mr. Norman suggests joining Big Brothers Big Sisters of America. Ben speaks in a normal tone of voice for once as he agrees that he and Trevor will become Big Brothers. Those poor kids.
At Webb Graphics, Noel runs into Zoe in a hallway. He calls her back and asks whether "the way [they] keep passing each other in the halls" is weird. Well, how often is it happening? If it's every couple of minutes, I'd say it's pretty weird. Zoe admits that she's been avoiding Noel because she doesn't know how to act. Whoops, that should be: "Because she doesn't know how to act around him." Noel insists that they don't have to avoid each other, and says they should just be professional. I'm distracted by Zoe's blue eyeshadow. Eventually, I pay attention long enough to learn that Zoe will be in charge of the CGG account while her dad is out of town for a couple of weeks. Noel insists that he's fine with that, and to my relief, there aren't any labored jokes about Noel being "under" Zoe. While pausing to glance nervously at the passersby, Noel mentions, "A couple of my friends are throwing a party tomorrow night, maybe, uh, I don't know, maybe you want to go with me?" Zoe says that would be great, and they repeat their new goal of being "professional."
Felicity arrives at what looks like an architecture firm, as opposed to a classroom. I assumed she was helping a fellow student, as opposed to starting an unpaid internship for a couple of days. She is pointed over to Adam, an Ed Norton-y guy who is on the phone. As she reaches him, she hears him begging to talk to someone who, obviously, then hangs up on him. Felicity introduces herself and explains that she's searching for a "career path." Adam remembers Noel mentioning her. Adam wonders if he can ask Felicity something: "Say you're dating someone. She says she's in love with you and then one day, bam, she wants to break up. Yes or no, she's dating someone else?" Felicity lies that she doesn't know, and tries to steer the conversation toward the model Adam needs help building. Adam admits that Dina used to help with his models, and before he gets distracted again, Felicity offers to work on it. Adam thinks that would be great, and repeats, "Dina used to help me with that." Felicity smiles tightly and says, "Yeah, you mentioned that."
Ben hurries to finish dressing as he apologizes to his dad, "I thought the game was tomorrow night." Jack Tripper says that's okay, and mentions that he wants to stop by Lauren's afterward to drop off some baby-related books. "I figured [that] if this guy's not gonna help her out, I will," Jack says. Hey, great, that solves Ben's problem completely, doesn't it? Now he doesn't have to worry about Lauren! Ben stops tying his shoes and says he has to tell Jack something. Ben looks down and confesses, "I know who the father is." Jack asks who, and Ben says, "It's me, dad." He explains that he slept with Lauren while he and Felicity were broken up. Jack is flummoxed. Ben explains, "I didn't find out until last week. She waited four months to tell me." Jack sympathizes, and Ben angsts. He mutters, "Am I supposed to drop out of school and get a job? I wanna be a doctor. I'm not ready for this." Jack makes an incredible understatement in observing that it's complicated. So, would it have been less complicated if Lauren had told him she was pregnant three months ago? I mean, I sympathize with Ben feeling overwhelmed by the news, but I think he'd have been just as overwhelmed if Lauren had told him sooner.
Ben shows up at Felicity's. He says that she wasn't answering the phone, and says, "I thought you were coming to my place." Felicity explains that she has to work on the building model she's fussing over, and notes that Adam was too busy worrying about his romance to explain what she should do. She asks how the game was. Ben says that he and Jack didn't go, and adds, as if it wasn't related, that he told his father about Lauren. Felicity asks what Jack said, and Ben replies, "Nothing. He just kinda listened, like a dad." They both approve of Jack's response, and Ben asks if Felicity will come to his place later. Felicity says, "I feel like I better work on this." Ben pauses and asks if everything's okay, and she insists that she just wants to get the model done. Ben says, "Are you sure? Because you seem kind of upset." She really doesn't, though. Anyway, she says she's fine, and Ben leaves. If he wants to hang out, can't he sit and talk to Felicity while she works? Why does she have to come to his place?
The day, Noel and Sean arrive at a conference room at the office. Noel sits down to yet another bland...I mean "blonde," and introduces himself. The girl introduces herself as Jessica, and adds, "My desk is two down from yours." Shouldn't he have already met her, then? I'm not great with the office socializing, but even I've met the people who work right around me. Zoe impatiently starts the meeting by asking for Noel's report on the CGG account. Noel has to stand up to talk, which is pretty ridiculous considering that they're all sitting around a conference table. It's not as if there are people in the back of the room who won't be able to see him unless he stands up, you know? But again, my company might not have the most formal business practices, so I may not be a good judge of these things Noel announces that he and Sean have been working on a mail-order catalog for CGG. "Excuse me?" Zoe says, somehow managing to sound perkily rude. She says that they didn't ask for a catalog, and Noel agrees that they didn't and starts to explain: "We thought it might be a good idea for CGG --" Zoe interrupts, "To waste money?" Noel, stymied, asks if Zoe would like to see their ideas. She says that she doesn't need to, and Sean, ever-diplomatic, says "Yeah, you do, 'cause you haven't heard..." Zoe smiles insincerely as she says, "I've heard enough, thanks." Sean and Noel stare at Zoe as she moves to the item on the agenda.
Cut to Sean and Noel, walking along the street in completely different clothes. Sean begs Noel to talk to Zoe because "there seems to be a lot of tension between the two of [them]." Sean says that he gets enough abuse at home, and complains that Meghan hates everything he does. Noel points out that Meghan hates everything, which is fair. He doesn't point out that it would be a lot easier to tell if Meghan was too critical if Sean had better ideas. They get in line for a coffee cart as Sean keeps babbling about his shoe covers. As they reach the front of the line, the girl selling coffee chirps, "You could call 'em 'shoe jackets'!" She looks so much like Andie McPhee that I was frightened. Maybe it's just the beret. The girl insists that the "shoe jackets" are a good idea, and says she'd buy them. Despite the fact that they are only suitable for men's shoes. I'm not sure she's clear on the concept. She gives Noel a cup of coffee, despite the fact that he never ordered anything. Wow, she's a psychic coffee vender. That's actually brilliant, because that would spare customers the agony of accidentally getting a grande half-caf when they actually ordered a mocha with a shot of absinthe, or whatever. Sean, delighted to have found someone who appreciates him, invites the girl to the party. "I could show you the prototype for shoe jackets," he adds. Oh, how many times have I heard that line? "Come to this party, and I'll show you my shoes." She falls for it, and they finally exchange names and shake hands while Noel stares disbelievingly at Sean. The girl's name is apparently Clancy. I have trouble believing that. Sean and Noel finally walk on, and suddenly Sean has a cup of coffee, too! When did he get that? Did he palm it while shaking hands with Clancy? As they cross the street, Noel reminds Sean that he's married. Sean insists, "That was for you." Noel doesn't buy it. I think the fact that Sean didn't even introduce Noel pretty well clinches that fact.
In her acting class, Meghan is unenthusiastically acting a scene from Romeo and Juliet with an untalented classmate. I'm just going to call him Romeo until he gets a name. He's wearing a stocking cap and has his button-down shirt tucked into his jeans, which makes me wonder if he's the result of some grunge-geek crossbreeding experiment. Romeo finishes their scene by kissing Meghan, much to her surprise. The class applauds politely while Meghan looks dazed.
Then the class is over, and Romeo tells Meghan, "Good scene." Meghan dismisses it as "saccharine schmaltz," while Javier watches. Romeo is, naturally, in a band, and invites Meghan to come watch them perform. Meghan says she has to go to a party, but Romeo says they don't come on till 1 AM, so she could come after the party. It seems to me that college parties don't get started until ten or so, and are just getting going around one. But I went to school in the Midwest, so who knows what crazy things they do in the big city? I like the idea that college students in New York end their parties by midnight so they can get up bright and early. Anyway, Meghan is seduced by the mention of such a late hour, and invites Romeo to come to the party. "What?" asks Javier. Romeo accepts the invitation and then leaves. Javier reminds Meghan that she's married, and Meghan snaps, "Yeah, to a grandpa who's asleep by nine." Javier gasps. What is preventing Meghan from going out without Sean? Nothing, you say? Thought so.
Felicity brings the model to Adam, explaining that it might not be "exactly right." He tells Felicity that he called Dina, and a man answered. "Do you think she's seeing him?" he wonders. Felicity stammers in that way she does until Adam shoves his cell phone into her hand and tells her to ask for Dina. She does so, and then Adam takes the phone back and tells Dina, "It's me! Who's the guy? Hello?" Adam sadly reports that Dina hung up. I'm starting to think that Dina has the best judgment of anyone on this show. He observes that "sometimes things just don't work out the way you think they're going to," and Felicity admits that "sometimes love sucks." I can't figure out if Felicity's sweater is crocheted or if one of the sleeves is unraveling. Maybe it's her ravelled sleeve of care, except that's really a different thing, and never mind. They shouldn't have mentioned Shakespeare before. Adam finally takes a look at the model and panics because it's all wrong and he'll have to fix it. Felicity apologizes instead of pointing out that Adam was too distracted to tell her what to do, and says that she can try to repair the damage that night. I assume this means that she'll miss the party and then Ben will think she's involved with Adam and wackiness will ensue, but it turns out that the chronology of this episode is just deeply messed up.
Ben is stuffing a duffel bag with sports equipment when Jack Tripper shows up. Ben explains that he's "doing this Big Brother thing," and is about to go meet his Little Brother. Jack thinks that's great and isn't at all curious as to why Ben is doing this, but it's so contrived that I don't blame him for just skipping it. Jack just dropped by to make a speech, anyway. He starts by offering Ben some sympathy and then declares, "I think you're making a mistake, and I don't want you to do something you're going to regret." Ben insists that it's simple: "She decided to have the kid and I didn't." Jack says that the kid needs a father, and Ben snarks, "You're the last person I want to listen to about this." Ouch. Jack admits he wasn't a perfect father, and Ben corrects him: "No, you weren't a father!" Double ouch. Although if Ben's hurt that his dad wasn't there for him, that kind of proves Jack's point. Jack pauses and says he's trying to be a father now, and Ben mutters something that I eventually translate as, "It's a little late." He grabs his bag and leaves. Another thing I don't understand is why Ben has to decide what to do right this second. I do think that, planned or not, he has a responsibility to the baby, but the kid hasn't even been born; he can take a few weeks to adjust to the idea. If, months later, he's still acting like he can just pretend it never happened, then people should start nagging him.
Ben walks down the street and checks an address. Across the street he spots a kid on a stoop who actually looks pretty cute, even to me. Ben and the kid look at each other. Ben stares at the kid with an expression that I think is meant to indicate emotional conflict, but it reads as flat-out disgust. Then he turns and leaves. It totally looks as if he checked out the kid and thought, "Ew, that kid doesn't deserve me," and left. Way to traumatize the poor kid. Jerk.
Zoe is setting up slides in the conference room. She's wearing a different sweater, and Noel is wearing the shirt that he wore earlier while Sean was inviting Clancy to the party. So I'm guessing that was the out-of-order scene. Or one of them. Noel says he wants to talk about what happened yesterday, and asks, "What was that?" He says that he thought they were going to be professional, and Zoe cluelessly says, "We were!" and I really don't like her. She's all, "Oh, I'm just a cute girl, and if I was rude I didn't mean to be, and I'm so pretty that you can't possibly be mad at me, tee hee!" Noel persists, and says that she can't take it out on him if she's uncomfortable with him. He actually handles that pretty well, confronting her without sounding hostile. Zoe continues to act innocent, and says that she just didn't like some of his ideas. She says, "I know it's hard working below me, but..." And then Noel ruins everything by saying, "If it weren't for me you guys wouldn't even have this account!" Oh dear. At least he didn't make a joke about being "below" her in some other sense. Zoe brushes him off, and Noel gives up after asking her again to look at the ideas he and Sean came up with. Okay, so the coffee-cart scene should come before this one, and it takes place while they're on their way to work instead of going home. Buying coffee on the way to work makes more sense, too. This episode is like a logic problem.
The guitar of random plot developments strums as Felicity puts a model tree by the model building and asks, "Is that it?" Adam says they're done, and Felicity observes that it's 4 AM. So the party is over. Except it isn't, because now we're back at the night before the party! Adam apologizes, but Felicity says it's nice to "have a distraction." Adam agrees, and asks what Felicity is trying to avoid. Felicity hedges and avoids sharing her problems with a complete stranger because she's aware of little things called boundaries. Adam compliments her because apparently Felicity came up with a "residual space idea." He explains that it's "the space between the buildings." Is that symbolic of something? I'd ask what the trees symbolized, but I've read Freud. He (Adam, not Freud) says, "You said you were searching for something? Maybe this is it." Felicity says maybe it is, and then Adam asks if he can take her to dinner. She explains about the party -- and by the way, whose idea was the party? And is there a particular reason for it? Maybe we'll find out at the end, in a scene that was originally set the week. Felicity invites Adam to the party, and he accepts before reassuring her, "Whatever it is, I'm sure it's gonna be fine."
And now we're at the party! So it's the night. Or the night. Or six months earlier. I give up. Trevor hands Ben a beer and asks if he met his Little Brother. Ben's all, "Huh?" and Trevor observes, "Apparently it was a very memorable experience." Ben lies about meeting his Little Brother, and Trevor enthuses that he spent all day at the arcade with his own kid. I bet Trevor got along well with his Little Brother, because they're probably at the same maturity level. Elena appears and hands Ben the phone, saying someone called for him. I guess she didn't get caught in the time loop, since this is her only appearance in the episode. She asks Trevor, "Are you gonna hang out in the bathroom all night, or can we go out and dance?" What? I have to rewind to confirm that this scene is, in fact, taking place in the bathroom. I missed the fact that they were using the bathtub as an ice chest for the beer. But I was distracted by the fact that there were so many people in there. That is one huge bathroom. Even so, it's a bad idea to keep the beer in the one room that people will be closing the door to. And there are other, grosser reasons, but I'm not going to think about that too closely. Anyway, Trevor tells Elena, "I thought we could hang out in the bathroom together!" That's right on the edge between gross and entertaining. Elena giggles and drags Trevor away. But not toward the door. Unless the bathroom has two doors, which it might, since it's larger than my kitchen. I'm a little distracted, sorry. Bye, Elena!
Sean is asking Noel to help calculate the chances that Clancy will show up. I really like Sean. Except for the part where he's being an asshole to his wife, but that's so silly that I can ignore it. Noel makes fun of Sean for "acting like it's a date," and Sean says he isn't, then asks, "Do I look all right?" Then he adds, "What? I'm kidding!" Cheating is funny! Noel is suddenly amazed because Zoe has arrived, and he heads off to greet her.
Felicity is munching on snacks, oblivious to her crummy hair, when Ben pops up and says that he has to go. He explains that Jack just called from a bar downtown. "He's about to have a drink." Felicity "omigod"s, and I will concede that Ben's issues make sense given what a jerk his father is. But having reasons to be a jerk doesn't let you off the hook -- you're still a jerk. Felicity offers to go along, but Ben tells her he'll call when he knows what's going on. Oh, she's got that braid in her hair again, too. Badness.
Meghan is chatting with Romeo about what instrument he plays. Romeo declares, "We're not really into instruments. We're into spoken-word." That's why you don't go on till 1 AM. Sean marches over and demands, "Who the hell's this?" Oh, Sean. This is so dumb. Megan introduces Romeo as Rocco, which isn't that different a name. Sean introduces himself as Meghan's husband, which confuses Rocco slightly. But I think a lot of things confuse Rocco. Meghan asks, "Shouldn't you be home? Isn't it way past your bedtime?" Luckily, that's when Clancy calls Sean over. Except for the "luckily" part. Sean waves to Clancy and tells Meghan, "Looks like I'll be staying out late tonight. Very late." But he says it cheerfully, not nastily, which I kind of enjoy. I might be a little bit biased about Sean. I like Meghan, too. I really can't take this cheating thing seriously enough to get mad at either of them. Sean goes to chat with Clancy, and Rocco tells Meghan, "I just want you to know, I'm totally into the open-marriage thing." Okay, it's dumb, but that's where I was hoping this would go. Mostly because I hate plots that end with everyone getting embarrassed. This way it's just silly.
Meghan goes over to introduce herself to Clancy, and Sean explains that Clancy runs the coffee cart outside work. Meghan snipes, "How cute." She tells Clancy that Sean is her husband, and then tells Sean that Rocco kissed her in class. She leaves, and Clancy is understandably confused. Sean says, "She's a little -- she doesn't know what she's talking about. I'll be right back." And then he goes after Meghan. Clancy looks so much like Andie that I'm expecting her to pop some pills any second.
Sean and Meghan have a confrontation in the kitchen. And for a while they start each sentence with "Newsflash," which gets tiresome very, very quickly. I think it was supposed to go on for so long that it would go from funny to annoying to even funnier, but it wasn't very funny to begin with so that premise was flawed. Anyway, Sean says that Clancy likes his shoe covers; Meghan says that Clancy is an idiot and that Rocco invited Meghan to see his band. Sean says that if she wants to be with Rocco, that's fine. Megan says Sean can go be with his "coffee girl," and Sean says that's a good idea. "At least one of us has good ideas," Meghan snaps. Sean and Meghan separate and go stand by their...um, dates? Who look a bit awkward, and justifiably so.
Adam finds Felicity, still by the munchies. He asks if she's okay, and she says that she is. Then he says that he submitted their model, but that after looking at the other entries he doesn't think that they have a chance at winning. He asks again if she's okay, and except for her hair she looks fine, so why does he keep asking that? Adam gives me the creeps. He asks if she'd like a drink, and they head off to the palatial bathroom. I think everyone goes in pairs to get drinks because if you go by yourself, you might get lost and never find your way out. Because, see, the bathroom? It's large.
Zoe and Noel are sitting in a relatively quiet room, and Zoe admits that she looked over the catalog ideas and they were good. She finally apologizes for being unprofessional, and explains, "When you sat across the room from me, I don't know...I couldn't help it." It turns out that she was mad because, at the meeting, Noel sat to Jessica instead of sitting by her. Noel doesn't make the obvious excuse that he couldn't tell the interchangeable perky blondes apart. Instead, he first plays dumb, and then confesses, "The only reason that I didn't sit to you is because I was nervous." Zoe wonders what he thought would happen, and Noel also doesn't say, "Oh, I thought maybe you'd try to embarrass me in front of my new co-workers." Which reminds me of the last TWoP conference, when Aaron sat to Jessica because he was nervous about sitting near Sars and her trained attack owl, or at least that's what he claimed later, but that's another story for another time. I'm just trying to delay the moment when I have to admit that Noel tells Zoe, predictably and painfully, that maybe he was afraid of "this," and leans over to kiss Zoe. Ew. Zoe says that wasn't very professional, and Noel asks if that's a problem. Zoe says, "Yeah," and then they smooch some more.
Felicity and Adam are sitting in a bedroom with fresh drinks. Felicity isn't very good at sensing when boys are interested in her, is she? More party tips from Strega: don't go off into bedrooms with boys who like you if you don't like them back. Especially if you're both drinking. And if you're hosting a party, don't let people hang out in the bedrooms. You're asking for spilled beer on your bedding, and frankly that's the very least of the potential disasters. Felicity asks, "So what happened with Dina? Did it ever work out?" "Ever"? It's been a day. Adam says that Dina "never called [him] back." They're acting like it's been months. It's been. One. Day. Which they both, presumably, spent a large portion of asleep. Adam asks, "What happened with your...stuff? Is it any better?" Felicity moans, "No," and gulps her beer. Adam tells Felicity that she's great, and suddenly leans in to kiss her. Felicity jerks back and asks what he's doing. He says, "I'm not sure...." which is kind of cute. Felicity, horrified, tells Adam that she has a boyfriend, as if Adam should just sense that, and basically does nothing to make him feel as if he made an understandable mistake. I mean, not that Adam should be trying to hook up with anyone when he's still obsessed with his ex, but Felicity could just laugh it off and try to make Adam feel less idiotic. Adam jumps up and declares, "I'm gonna go," and Felicity just nods and doesn't even look at him and grrr. Sorry, but I once hit on a guy who I didn't know was already involved, and he was so much nicer about it than Felicity is being. It was still humiliating, though, and I feel bad for Adam. Even if he does give me the creeps. Adam nervously says, "Thanks for the party, it was really...fun," and wanders out looking shell-shocked. Felicity "ugh"s and collapses on the bed.
Ben hops out of a cab and spots Jack on the sidewalk. Ben actually manages to enunciate, "Dad, I'm not your sponsor!" Jack whines that it's heartbreaking "to watch your child making mistakes." Ben calls Jack on his manipulation, and good job, too, because that's just awful. I don't think Ben should have even gone down there, although I can understand why he did. Ben says, "You wanna drink, fine, go drink. But if you ever do, I will never forgive you!" Jack interrupts to insist that he doesn't want to have a drink, and that's why he called. Oh, whatever. Ben pulls Jack over to put him in the taxi. Jack stops and says, "I know I'm a bad father. But I know you, and I know you won't be able to live with yourself if you don't do the right thing." I still don't get the urgency of all this. Ben probably wouldn't be so adamant about not being a father to his child if people would stop lecturing him for few hours. Ben tells Jack to get in the cab. Jack insists, "You're too good a person!" It's hard to respond to that. You can't say, "No, I'm not!" without sounding pretty silly. I'm conflicted, because again, I don't like Ben, but his jerkitude makes a lot of sense to me given his family. So I guess it's good characterization, but I still think Ben needs years and years of therapy before he gets involved with anyone, particularly someone as flaky as Felicity. And he might consider getting some speech therapy, too. Jack gets into the cab, which pulls away, and Ben stomps off.
Ben slips into Felicity's room, where she's already asleep. He sits on the bed, waking her. Another whispered conversation. Thank heaven for closed captioning. Felicity asks how it went with Jack. Ben says, "It went okay. What are you thinking?" Felicity plays dumb, and Ben says, "I want to talk to you about it, but it feels like you're avoiding me." Well, you're not exactly forthcoming with discussion of your parental trauma, Ben. Felicity admits that she has been avoiding him, because she doesn't know what to say. Ben claims that she can say whatever she wants, saying, "I wanna know what you're thinking." Psst, Ben? Think about it for five seconds. She probably feels betrayed, and guilty because she knows she has no right to be angry, and just generally confused about the whole situation, and worried about you. I mean, how would anyone feel? She lifts herself up from the pillow in a way that looks completely uncomfortable, and is obviously just so her big speech isn't muffled by the bedding. Felicity whispers, "I just keep thinking about...about what you said, about how this isn't gonna change anything, and I'm trying to believe that, but I don't know if I do." She adds, "This choice that you've made -- I just, I don't know if you're gonna be able to live with that." Hey. In the commercials there was a snippet of this scene, and it sounded as if she said, "I don't know if I'm gonna be able to live with that." Or was that just me? Ben admits that Jack told him the same thing.
Meghan clomps up to bed. Sean is sitting on the edge of the bed, looking away from her. She gets into bed and doesn't face him. Sean lays down facing the other way. Isn't someone going to turn all the lights off? Sean asks, "Did you get lucky?" "Did you?" Meghan replies. When did this become Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? We'll skip past the passive-aggression to Megan saying that she just wants to go out sometimes. Seriously, is Sean stopping her? Okay, I can understand she'd want him to come with her sometimes, but it might not be as big a deal if she went out on her own as well. Sean replies, "I just want you to like one of my ideas." Meghan thinks about that, and finally says that the shoes she was wearing that night were uncomfortable. Y'know, I don't think this is the best way to resolve their problems. They gradually roll over to face each other as Sean asks, "Have you ever heard of shoe covers?" Yes, and they won't work for women's shoes because of the high heels. Duh. Sean explains, "They go over your sneakers. Looks like you're wearing fancy shoes." I just quoted that part because I like the phrase "fancy shoes." Not dress shoes: "fancy shoes." Hee. That might only be funny in my head. Although Meghan seems amused by it, too. She says this might solve her problems, despite the heel issue. Sean says, "Why don't we go out tomorrow night?" Meghan asks if she could wear the shoe covers. Maybe Meghan could make them seem cool. Maybe only Meghan could make them seem cool. Sean says, "I'm so sorry," and Meghan "me too"s, and they cuddle. Sean is so cute. I have no objectivity here. None.
An undetermined amount of time later, Felicity is in a bar, looking at what appears to be an architecture textbook. She looks up to see Noel entering the place. Felicity waves him over and asks, "What are you doing here?" Noel asks how things went with Adam. She says that Adam's a great guy. Noel says, "He called me last night after the party -- he felt terrible about what happened." So it's the day after the party. Did Adam call while Noel and Zoe were...well, we don't know they did, but calling the night of a party is pretty uncool. That's another college tip from me: assume everyone is asleep or hung over for at least twelve hours after a party. No non-emergency phone calls. Felicity admits that it was awkward, and Noel sleazes, "Who can blame him, right?" There's no good response to that but "Ew." Now it's Noel's turn to ask if Felicity's okay, and she repeats that she has "a lot going on." She asks if he wants to join her, but that's when Zoe enters. Where was she, paying the cab? Noel calls Zoe over, and she apologizes for being late. Oh, okay, they were meeting here. Noel gives her a kiss on the cheek, which seems odd because are they officially dating after one night? I don't know. Anyway, Noel introduces Zoe to Felicity, and then they go to take a different table, which is a little rude, but whatever. Felicity sits back down to look at her book, and glances up at Noel and Zoe, who are sitting on the same side of their little table. I hate people who do that.
Ben lets Jack into his apartment and thanks him for coming over. They sit down, and Jack asks what's up. Ben retreats into the whisperiest whisper ever and says, "I just wanted to talk to you." Jack apologizes for the way he acted last night. Ben says it's okay, and adds, "I think you might be right. About me doing this." He looks down at his knees and says, "I don't know where to start." Jack says he'll help however he can, and I think not being manipulative and crazy would probably be a good start. Then Jack awkwardly reaches over and pats Ben's knee briefly, and then they take turns looking at each other and looking down, and I don't want to make too much of it, but I really liked that moment because it was so awkward and it seemed like they both wanted to connect and didn't know how. It just worked. Nice job.
Ben strolls down the street with his duffel bag and stops to look at the same kid from yesterday, who's talking to his mom. This time, instead of looking disgusted, Ben crosses the street and introduces himself. Mom shakes his hand and immediately leaves, which seems a little peculiar. Ben sits down and starts showing the kid all of the stuff he brought: a water gun, a Frisbee, a basketball. Ben asks if the kid likes basketball, and the kid says, "Yes," in a very formal way that I enjoy. Ben asks if the kid wants to go play basketball, and off they go.
time, or at least sometime soon: Kim finishes unpacking, Noel thought someone liked him, Ben invites Felicity to Arizona, and Felicity stomps off.