I have give a huge shout-out to my Felicity writing partner, Kim, because she wrote the first four paragraphs of this recap. I had some taping technical difficulties and missed the first few minutes but Kim stepped in to help me out. Thanks, Kim!
I also want to tell all the witless goobers out there who keep e-mailing us to inform us that Knoll's name is actually "Noel": We know. It is a joke. This is a satirical recounting of a television show. Get over it. The time any of you brainiacs does that, I'm going to start forwarding you all the spam that I get at my Hotmail account. I'm sure you'll enjoy all the "Make $$$$$$$$ from home," "Cheap Viagra!!!!!!!," and "Diplomas for free!!!!!!!" messages as much as I do. Just stop it because you're making Glark cry.
Previously on Felicity: Ruby told Knoll she thinks her purpose in life might be to have this baby. Felicity told Greg (the Health Center guy) she's not an idiot. Ben told Felicity he took the Health Center gig to be with her.
Felicity and Ben are at work at Dean & Deluca. Both of them are carrying things around and they keep running into each other, literally. Ben laughs it off but Felicity is all grouchy. He asks her if she wants to "talk about it," and when she professes ignorance as to what he wants to talk about, he responds, "That mood you're in." Felicity admits that Greg is bugging her because he's so "unbelievably arrogant, and "gets pleasure from pushing people around." Ben agrees, and says she should quit. Felicity doesn't want to, because that's what Greg wants and she's "not going to give him that satisfaction"; she resolves to "keep pushing back." As they continue to shelve the product-placed Pepsi, Ben says he's "no good with authority." Felicity asks what's going on with his community service and Ben says he's "avoiding it as long as [he] can." Felicity is upset that she has to "deal with Greg Stenson" while Ben is "doing nothing." Ben says Pavone is "really riding [his] ass" and making him take "some philosophy class." Felicity looks at him with disbelief and starts to go into the back room. Ben asks where she's going and Felicity says that Elena is "painting her apartment" and she's going to "help her pick out some colors." Ben nods and off-camera we hear Felicity crash into yet another co-worker.
Ruby is on the phone, telling someone that she's a "first-time patient" and she's "on [her] parent's insurance," but that she would prefer to "pay by check." She makes an appointment, then checks with Knoll, who is seated in the foreground, whether the time is okay with him. He doesn't hear her at first because he's lost in thought, but eventually agrees. Ruby confirms the time and hangs up, then says they have their "first pre-natal appointment" as she pencils it into her planner. She realizes how weird that sounds. Knoll is a lot less than enthusiastic, and Ruby's all "you don't have to go" and Knoll's all "I said I would" and Ruby's all "you don't want to" and "no one's forcing you to do anything" and "you can do whatever you want." Knoll asks, "Can I?" and then says what he wants to do is disappear or "trade places with someone else." Ruby looks a bit crestfallen. Knoll continues to say he would "love to be that guy" who "stands by [Ruby's] side and blindly goes along with this whole thing" but he "can't be that guy." Ruby just stares at him, and Knoll blurts out, "I'm sorry" as he leaves. ["Um, Knoll, you'd be wise to remember Barretta's wise words at this point in time: 'Don't do the crime, if you can't do the time.' As a sexually active adult -- and I use that term loosely in this case -- every time you sleep with a woman, you risk getting her pregnant. This is as much your fault as hers. Suck it up and take some responsibility. Let that be a lesson for all you kids out there." -- Maggie]
Elena, Felicity and Julie are walking down the street, carrying paint cans. Elena says they can have a "painting party" Friday after class. Felicity wonders if Elena's asked Knoll about this. Elena insists that he'll "love it" because he "hates the wallpaper" just as much as she does. Felicity tries to tell them that Knoll and Ruby are going through "a rough spot" and it might not be "the best time for a party." Elena says it will cheer him up, and Knoll and Ruby are "such a couple" that "they'll be fine." Elena also says she's inviting Tracy and Julie chimes in, "Ooh, your sexy new lab partner!" Elena wishes everyone would stop calling him that. Julie wonders how things are going between them and Elena says so far it's been a lot of "Pass the magnesium sulfate," but she hopes the party will change things. Julie stops to buy some food and Felicity stops too and asks if Julie will be inviting Eric to the party. Julie says nonchalantly that it didn't "work out" and they're "not really talking anymore." Felicity wonders about the record deal and Julie says, in the same flippant tone, "That's just not gonna happen." Felicity's all "Whaaat?" and Julie insists that it's not a big deal, and takes off, leaving Felicity staring after her in disbelief. ["Thanks again, Kim!" -- Maggie]
At the apartment Elena unpacks the painting supplies. She glances at Knoll, who is having a staring contest with a chip. Which he is losing. Elena laughs and says, "You don't have to eat that chip now, you know? Well, if it's all right with you, I made an executive decision to have a painting party on Friday." Knoll asks, "A painting party?" Elena admits, "Not a 'party' party. Just hanging out. We'll get a few people in here to help get rid of this ugly wallpaper." Knoll points out that they only have three months left in the apartment. It seems like a huge apartment to me -- why wouldn't they keep it for another year? Did I miss something? Anyway, Elena thinks three months is long enough and that the place looks "hideous." Knoll says whatever and consents to the party. Elena speculates, "You know, maybe it's the wallpaper that's making you depressed. They've done studies. People with blue walls are much happier than people with black walls." I'm not sure about that; deborah, of West Wing fame, had black walls in her bedroom in one of the places she lived. I don't know which made her unhappier -- her black walls or her numerous roommates. Knoll claims that the wallpaper is not depressing him. Elena persists and wants to know what is bothering him. He tells her that Ruby is pregnant and that she wants to keep the baby. He admits that he was a jerk to her and that she isn't even talking to him at the moment. Knoll retreats to his room while Elena is left reeling by this news.
Knoll is in a lecture hall writing on the board. Ben enters, asks Knoll if he is the T.A. and hands him a card. Ben stammers, "Yeah, uh, my guidance counsellor is making me take this class. Uh, I guess I'm supposed to get you to sign this." Ruby comes in, snubs Knoll, then takes a seat. Knoll takes his eyes off her for a moment to sign Ben's card. Ben sits down behind Ruby.
At the Health Centre, Felicity is walking towards the front desk. Greg catches up to her and says, "Felicity, I need you to put these patient charts in the database." Felicity asks him if he read the Times yesterday. Greg wants to know why she is asking and she tells him, "Well, there was this article on the New York Blood Center. How supply is really low right now. It's sort of a crisis." Greg's response is that there's never enough blood and it is always a crisis. Felicity wants to do something to help. Greg dismissively informs her that they "hold blood drives every May and September." Then he says, "Let me know when you're done with those. I've got more," and disappears. Felicity says to herself, "Please is nice."
Back at the lecture hall, Knoll's class is leaving. Ruby rushes out behind a girl wearing a pony hair vest. Knoll watches her leave. Ben almost makes a clean getaway until Knoll says, "You never, uh, you never finished telling me about you and that girl. In high school." Knoll and Ben sit in the empty lecture hall while Ben says, "We'd only been going out for, like, a few months. But, uh, I really liked her. She was...she was sweet. Her name was Kelly. We talked about options, though. But we both knew what we were gonna do. We weren't gonna have a baby. I was supposed to pick her up and I was, I was scared. And some of my friends invited me on this trip, and I just...I just freaked out. I freaked out, and I went snowboarding instead." Knoll looks disgusted and says, "You didn't show?" Ben confesses, "No. I still can't believe I did that. Just chickened out like that, you know?" Knoll thinks that was "horrible." Ben continues, "I almost called her last year, just to apologize. Just to tell her I still think about it. You know -- what that must have been like, just sitting there. Just sittin' there waiting for me to show up. I mean, that's why I'm telling you this. I know what a screwed-up situation this is, you know? I know how easy it is to act like an idiot; to act like a coward. I really regret the way I acted. I really do. I just wish I acted differently." Ben, Ben, Ben. You know I love you, but you're so dumb sometimes. I hope that now you've grown up a bit, you wouldn't act like that. Please tell me that you wouldn't act like that now. ["I think that, while it is a stupid and thoughtless thing to have done, it isn't really inconsistent with the Ben we know now. I mean, I don't think that if he had, say (God forbid) gotten Julie pregnant when they were dating, he'd have chickened out of taking her for an appointment to terminate said hypothetical pregnancy. But it's pretty easy to believe that the Ben of high school would have, so, props to the writers for plausibility." -- Wing Chun] Knoll tells Ben that Ruby wants to keep the baby. Ben's response is, "Wow." Knoll asks him, "What would you have done?" Ben rephrases the question, "What would I have done or what should you do?" Knoll engages in some heavy "smell the fart" acting and the scene ends.
At the Health Centre, a little girl with Keri Russell's old hair tied up in a pony tail is sitting on the floor, playing with a stethoscope. That's a pretty pricey toy, especially when money is tight. Anyway, Felicity sits down and puts the earpieces in the girl's ears. The girl asks if Felicity is a doctor. Felicity says no and the girl states that her mother is a doctor. Felicity says, "Yeah, I know, she works here. I hear she's a very good doctor." The girl declares that the stethoscope is broken because she can't hear Felicity's heartbeat. Felicity places the metal piece on her heart. The girl still can't hear anything and before Felicity can say or do anything else, Greg appears and clears his throat. He asks Felicity to "come and look at something." Felicity tells the girl that she'll be right back and the girl asks her if she'll fix the stethoscope when she returns.
Greg is at the computer and he motions to the monitor and asks, "See that folder?" Felicity says yes and then Greg asks, "Do you see the files in that folder?" to which Felicity says no. Greg gets on his high horse and says, "For the last three weeks, we've done all this work. Updating our patient files, and now the folder's empty. I thought you had a little more experience than your friend Ben." Felicity doesn't know what happened "to those files," and she doesn't think she "even opened that folder." Greg snarls, "You don't think?" Felicity emphatically states, " I know I didn't." Greg is not deterred and he snottily continues, "Well someone did. Do me a favour and really think about this: Do you have the competence to continue working here or not?" Felicity defiantly says, " I don't have to think about it. I didn't erase your files and I'm not quitting." Greg says, "Well, I guess, that's my problem. Tell you what. Why don't you go home and come back Monday." Felicity gathers her belongings and says, "You know what, you may be good with patients, but to everyone else, you're just rude." She smiles through gritted teeth and tells him that she'll see him on Monday.
At the Loft, Greg is grating what seems to be a potato. Julie is reading the paper, and Ben is getting ready to go out. Sean says to no one in particular, "Potatoes go in quiche, right?" Ben asks Julie if he'll see her at Elena's. Julie informs him that she's not going. Sean asks, "Going where?" Ben explains, "Uh, Elena's having people over to help paint her apartment." He asks Julie why she isn't going and reminds her that she invited him to go. Julie mutters unintelligibly, pretty much the way she delivers most of her lines when she is singing, that is. Ben splits and Sean keeps cooking, while Julie reads. Sean tells Julie, "I went to a painting party once. Fell down a flight of stairs." Julie ignores Sean. He says, "You might want to talk to someone about whatever it is that's bothering you. It's obvious that something is bothering you." Julie replies, "I don't have to. That's what I have you for." Sean says, "No, I'm serious. It might help you, you know, if you actively discuss things with someone who knows what they are talking about." Sean, advising someone to get counselling for her problems is the smartest unsolicited advice you've ever given. Julie does an about-face and decides to go to the party and invites Sean to come along. Naturally, he accepts the invitation.
Felicity knocks at Ruby's dorm room door to deliver a floor calendar. Not content to do just that, Felicity asks, "So, how are you doing? How are, uh, how are things with you and Knoll?" Ruby states that Knoll "sort of bailed out on [me]." Felicity is puzzled and Ruby elaborates, "I don't think he wants anything to do with the baby. I know, it seems crazy what I'm doing. I'm sure that's what everybody thinks. I guess. I just really thought Knoll would be different." Felicity looks sympathetic.
Knoll is sitting in a hospital waiting room beside a pregnant woman. Ruby comes in and Knoll gets up to greet her. She wonders what he is doing there. Knoll confesses his Kelly Tayloresque past behaviour by telling her, "The, uh, the other day. The things I said, I was just -- I was going out of my mind for a second. It's been, without a doubt, the most stressful week of my life. Not that that's an excuse for any of the things that I said, all of which I regret. Look, the point is, I'm not going anywhere. Okay, I'm gonna be here for you and...we'll go through this whole thing together." Ruby smiles and laughs a bit then they kiss and hug.
The scene opens with a shot of a photo of the gang. Ben is looking at it in Felicity's room while he waits for her to get ready for the party. Felicity says, "Pavone alluded to some story he got, but she wouldn't tell me what it is." Ben replies,"I don't care what it is. It doesn't excuse him from being such an ass." Um, watch who you're calling an ass, Mr. Posterior. Felicity quickly says, "Hey, believe me, I'm not making excuses for the guy." Then she grabs the photo and tells him not to look at it because she looks "so ridiculous." Ben tells her that she looks pretty. Meghan enters and asks Ben, "You begging her to drive across country again?" That's pretty funny, Meghan. Ben tries to be a smartmouth but all he comes up with is, "Yeah. I thought I'd do that about once a year." Felicity tells her that they're "gonna be at Elena's for a painting party." Ben invites Meghan to come because there'll be "a lot of paint to sniff." That's not bad, Ben. Meghan gives a mock "whatever" laugh. Ben and Felicity leave.
Back at the hospital, Ruby's ultrasound is in progress. I'm not a doctor, nor do I play one on MBTV, but isn't it a bit early for an ultrasound, and is it entirely necessary? Anyway, the doctor says, "there it is," and we are treated to a look at the monitor which shows a typical, blurry ultrasound. Ruby says, "That's the baby?" The doctor responds, "That little spot right there. You want to come look?" Knoll says, "Wow." Ruby asks how big it is. The doctor tells them, "About two centimetres. About the size of a pinto bean. You're eight weeks pregnant. Everything seems to be developing normally. Fetal weight. Heart function. All looks great." Ruby smiles and looks at Knoll. A confused and befuddled Knoll questions, "Eight weeks? That's two months. That's impossible. You were in L.A. two months ago." The doctor confirms that Ruby is eight weeks pregnant. The smile fades from Knoll's face as he asks Ruby, "That can't be right, can it?" Ruby looks at him, then looks away and doesn't say anything. The colour completely drains from Knoll's face. A resounding "D'OH!!!!!!!!" rings through Ruby's mind. I have to compliment Scott Foley for his acting in this scene.
In Ruby's room, Knoll shouts, "You had sex with another guy and it never crossed your mind to tell me? It never crossed your mind that this might not be my baby?" Ruby looks sick and says, "It was one night, and we were safe." Knoll's thinking what I'm thinking and he says, "No, you weren't that safe." Ruby blithers, "I don't know what happened. I never thought it could be his." Again, the words of Barretta ring in my ears: "Don't go to bed with no price on your head," but they apply to Ruby this time. Knoll wonders who the father is and Ruby says it is no one. Geez, neither Ruby nor Knoll seem to understand how sex works or the implications of it. These people are clearly too stupid to have a child together and luckily it looks like the world has been spared that atrocity. Knoll paces and yells, "I can't believe this is happening. Is he an actor?" Ruby informs him that the father is a producer. Knoll spits out, "A producer? There is not a more disgusting cliché than that for me." Ruby tries to employ her version of "we were on a break" by stating, "You and I weren't even really dating yet." Which, I guess, is true. Knoll counters with, "We had slept together before you left." Ruby's defence is that she didn't know what their sleeping together meant. Knoll bellows, "Then ask me!" Ruby blubbers, "I didn't know if you cared about me at all and then I got that first letter, and it was the sweetest thing. But it, it had already happened. I'm sorry." Knoll declares, "If I say anything else, I'll regret it later," and he stomps out. Ruby starts to cry.
At Knoll and Elena's apartment, Richard is pulling several layers of wallpaper off the wall and whining, "How many layers of wallpaper are there?" Ben, who is also scraping wallpaper, says, "I think it's, like, six." Richard, still whining, says, "Six? We're gonna be here for a month." Julie and Felicity cover the furniture with drop cloths. Sean claims that he's brought enough quiche for a month. Ben laughingly asks, "Quiche? You brought quiche?" Sean says, "I made it, okay? Anyone care to indulge? A little quiche?" Felicity, Julie, and Richard simultaneously say no, then they all laugh. Richard, who is still annoying me with his whining says, "So they invite us over to paint their apartment and then they don't show up. Nice." Felicity informs him that Elena and Tracy have gone out to get brushes and they'll be right back. Richard, with his gnat-like persistence, is not satisfied with that answer, and wants to know where Knoll is. Felicity tells him that Knoll will be there. Working my last nerve, Richard angrily demands, "What the hell's going on with that guy? He hasn't called me back in days." Richard, I'm sure no one returns your calls with any alacrity. Get over it. Felicity tries to mollify him: "Yeah. You know, I think, uh, he and Ruby are going through a rough time right now." Richard says, "You know, I warned him about her. I knew she was trouble." Someone please kick Richard in the slats for me.
Meghan is in the dorm room, spying on the neighbours with Felicity's telescope and eating something very crunchy. She says, "Omigod, please put a shirt on." There's a knock on the door and Meghan yells, "Carl, I'm not talking to you anymore." The knocker says, "It's not Carl." Meghan demands to know who it is. It turns out to be Greg but Meghan doesn't know a Greg so she warily asks, "Are you one of my advisees?" He says he isn't and she asks him what he wants. He says that he's looking for Felicity. As she walks to the door, she impatiently says, "I have news for you and everyone else looking for Felicity --" Meghan breaks off her sentence because she apparently likes what she sees in Greg. Ew. Greg says, "What?" and Meghan replies with a "what?" of her own. Greg says, "You have news? Do you know where she is?" Meghan stammers that Felicity should be back soon and asks him, "Do you want, do you want to come in and wait for her? Why don't you come in and wait for her." Greg comes in and Meghan closes the door with a grin on her face.
At the apartment, Julie and Felicity are talking and cleaning. Julie asks about the Health Centre and Felicity says that she loves being there "except for the guy that [she] work[s] for is such a jerk." Felicity continues, "Yeah, I don't know what his problem is. He's actually impressive. He basically runs the place. He has it out for me for some reason." He took it out? Just kidding. Julie doesn't really care enough to pursue this line of conversation, so she veers off to follow her own agenda and asks, "Hmm. So, um, there's, there's counsellors there and stuff, right?" Felicity says yes and Julie responds, "Oh, I was just wondering."
Elena and Tracy return to the apartment, carrying a bunch of bags. Elena introduces Tracy and many "heys" are exchanged. Tracy says to Richard, "Hey, I know you. Hey, you're the guy that had the satellite dish in your dorm room, right?" Richard proudly says that he is indeed that guy. Sean tries unsuccessfully to unload his quiche but there are no takers. Elena and Tracy are bustling around in the kitchen and he asks if she is wearing perfume. Rather coquettishly, Elena says, "Maybe." Tracy just smiles.
Meghan is cross-examining Greg in her room. "So that is when you knew for sure that you wanted to be a doctor." Greg cautiously replies, "Yes, during my dad's recovery." Meghan presses further with, "So then what?" Greg says, "And then I went to college." Meghan says, "Here?" Greg says, "Yeah." Meghan badgers, "Did you apply to a lot of schools? I did. I, I think it was a total fluke that I got in here. Not that I'm not smart. Am I making a fool of myself?" Greg realizes the Meghan is verging on stalker tactics with her questioning and he tries to leave while saying, "No, um, no. You know what, when Felicity gets back can you tell her that I stopped by?" Meghan blocks his exit and asks if he is leaving because she has just remembered where Felicity is and she offers to take him there. Meghan joyfully gets her coat and they leave. I think Meghan just wants access to his prescription pads.
At the apartment, Sean puts on the most excellent song, "Let it Whip," which is shamefully exploited in a "Tampax Was There" commercial -- like, that would be an awesome song for a marching band and drill team to perform, but not in the name of feminine protection products -- and begins to get down with his bad self, and I do mean "bad." Everyone stops and watches him as he dances and says, "Oh, oh, yeah!" Elena asks what he is doing and he says, "This is supposed to be a party right? Where is the party?" Everyone laughs. Sean coaxes Elena to dance, and she busts some pretty cool moves, naturally. Eventually they're all dancing. Richard does a geeky running-man-NKOTB thang and Sean starts to remind me of one of the dancers from the Charlie Brown Christmas Special, the guy with hunched shoulders. Ben dances too, but we don't see much of it, which likely means that Speedy isn't such a hot dancer. Knoll comes home and gradually everyone stops dancing. A few pleasantries are exchanged and then Richard blurts out, "You look like crap, man. You okay?" Knoll says he is fine and heads for his room. Elena turns off the music and no one says anything. Julie wonders if someone should talk to Knoll. Ben suggests giving Knoll some time. Sean and Tracy think Knoll looks terrible and Elena commiserates and says, "poor guy." Richard gets really annoying again and says, "Why 'poor guy'?" Julie and Sean say they don't know. Richard demands, "Someone tell me what the hell is going on." Elena tries to put him off by saying that Knoll and Ruby are having problems.
Meghan and Greg come through the apartment door and Meghan is laughing. She says, "Hi. Look who I brought." Felicity asks Greg what he is doing there. Greg asks if she has a second. Felicity suggests going into "the back room." I think she must mean Elena's room. Whatever. Ben seems annoyed that Greg is there and that Felicity is giving him the time of day. Behind closed doors, Greg confesses, "This morning, Maureen came into my office and apologized for having deleted some files in the computer. I know I can be a little abrupt at times, but there's a review of the Health Centre Tuesday. They come in, they evaluate the place. Anyway, I just -- I want it to be perfect. And it's just been really stressful." Felicity, looking vindicated, says, "Maureen did it?" Greg admits, "Yeah. And I promised I'd have all those files transferred to the computer before the review, so now, I'm gonna be there like, twenty-four hours a day getting that done, and it's not because of you. And I just, I wanted to come here and tell you that." And, you also wanted to guilt her into helping you, didn't you? Felicity, of oucrse, asks if he needs help and he, of course, accepts as gratefully as he is able. When they come out Meghan tries to hand Greg a plate of quiche. He declines it, so Sean tries to give him a scraper. Ben yells, "Sean!" Sean says, "What? Let him scrape. We need all the help we can get." Felicity says he doesn't have to but Greg says, "Uh, no that's okay, I can help out for a little while." Um, what was that you were just saying about working on some files? Ben seems peeved that Greg is staying. Meghan volunteers to stay too and Felicity frowns at her in disbelief. Richard is still buzzing around and he asks Elena, "So when you say he's having problems, what, what kind of problems?" Elena finally says, "Richard, if you don't stop bugging me..." That doesn't deter him because he continues, "What did she dump him? Does she have a deadly disease? Is she pregnant?" Elena stops dead in her tracks. Richard says, "What?" Elena says, "Nothing." Richard announces to everyone that Ruby is pregnant. Julie says, "Ruby's not pregnant." Felicity and Ben look at each other but don't say anything. Julie, Meghan, and Sean each say, "Omigod." Richard says, "Now I get it. Poor guy." Felicity wonders if anyone has checked on Knoll.
Knoll is still in his room, lying on his bed, listening to everyone dissect his life and troubles. Elena and Sean want to give him space and Felicity agrees. However, Richard says, "I can't believe she's pregnant." Elena says, "You know, I'm pissed. I can't believe what she's doing." Ben wants to know why she's pissed off. Elena says, "It's totally irresponsible to have a baby when you're a freshman in college." Richard says, "Wait, wait, wait. She's having a baby. That's insane." Knoll can clearly hear everything they're saying. Greg says, " Sixty-four percent of pregnant teenagers will actually have the baby and about 90% of them actually raise the child." Julie mentions the adoption option. Ben says, "Really? What percentage of parents stay together, Greg?" Greg wonders what Ben's problem is and Ben says, "My problem is that 63% of me thinks that you're a dick!" Hee hee! About 100% of me thinks Greg is a dick. Everyone talks at once and Elena says to Tracy, "Are you saying it's wrong for her not to have the baby? I thought you were pro-choice." Tracy admits, "Yeah, I am, but I mean, there's a choice, right?" Julie starts in again with, "Guys, we can sit here and say what we think Ruby should do. I'm adopted. What would happened if my birth mother decided not to have me?" Julie, we've all wondered what that would have been like, trust me. Richard thinks that "Ruby has Knoll trapped like a rat!" Then he says, "I gotta pee." Julie thinks that Knoll "is not the victim. Ruby is the one who has to deal with the consequences." Elena pipes up, "That's her choice." Julie comes back with, "He got her pregnant!" Knoll comes out of his room and says, "No, I didn't. It's, uh, it's not my baby." Meghan tells Greg, "Parties in this apartment are always so much fun." Knoll asks them to keep it down. Then there's a knock at the door. It's Ruby. She and Knoll retreat to his room. Everyone decides to leave. When Richard comes out of the bathroom, he sees no one around, so he leaves. He's probably used to having that happen.
In Knoll's room, Ruby says, "When I came out of the doctor's office, I actually thought, do I still want to go through with this, knowing that it's not yours, how it happened. Yes, it's part of me. I can't not have this baby; trying to figure out what it's like to be you in this situation. But I don't think I can. I barely know what it's like to be me anymore. I just want to tell you two things. One that I'm sorry, not just that I slept with someone for all the wrong reasons. But, that I didn't tell you. I didn't tell you because I wouldn't want you to tell me that just as we started dating you had this meaningless night with some girl. If that's all it was, I wouldn't even want to know. Can I have a tissue please?" Knoll hands her one and she continues, "The, uh, the other thing that I, I wanted to say is that, I really thought, that we were falling in love. I'm hoping that we can still make this work, despite things. Think about it. I mean, I don't mean to put pressure on you. I'm sorry if that's the way it makes you feel. I just, I needed to say this." Ruby leaves and Knoll stays there, thinking.
At the loft, neither Julie nor Sean can sleep. He finds her sitting in the kitchen. Sean says, "Interesting night, huh? " Julie thinks she may have overreacted. Gee, you think? She explains, "That whole discussion, I don't know, stirred something up in me. " Sean thinks everyone was stirred up. Julie asks him if Ben ever explained why she started living with them last year. Sean says no. Julie explains, "There was this guy Zach, we had just started dating. And he came by to my room one night, and he sort of forced himself on me." Sean asks, "What does that mean?" Julie elaborates, "He raped me. He dropped out of school, and I didn't press charges or anything. I don't know, I thought I was over it, but I guess I'm not." Sean tells her that the same thing happened to his sister, then he says, "Now there's two guys I want to kill." Yeah, that'll help, Sean. Why don't you do something productive like volunteer to do some postering for a rape crisis centre, or do presentations to high school boys about date rape. Surprising as it may seem, not all women who have been sexually assaulted want you to act like a caveman and continue the cycle of violence. It's hard to know what Julie thinks (if she thinks) because she just smiles. Then she tells him that she's going to get counselling. Good for you, Julie. Now how about getting some singing lessons?
At Dean and Deluca. Felicity tells Ben that Greg apologized. Ben rather immaturely points out "that doesn't mean [she] has to forgive him." Felicity says, "I work with him almost everyday. What do you want me to do, not accept his apology?" Ben petulantly says, "I wouldn't! He's such a loser. He's such an arrogant loser." Felicity accuses him of being funny about Greg. Ben denies it, so Felicity suggests that he's threatened by Greg. Ben argues, "No, I'm not threatened . I just see through that guy. I see through that, that stuck-up, you know, that elitist crap that he pulled. And I know that apology is all part of some, like, big manipulation or something." Felicity responds, "Okay, conspiracy theorist. " Ben tells her to "watch it." She says that she'll "watch it." He says, "You should." She says, "I will." Geez, what babies. Ben switches gears and asks her to go see Planet of the Apes. She can't go because she "told Greg that [she'd] help him input all his files." Is that what the kids are calling it these days? This represents proof to Ben. He states, "That's why he apologized -- so that you'd help him with whatever he needs help with." Felicity tells him that she offered to help and Ben claims that Greg knew she would offer to help. We all knew that, Ben. Felicity asks, "What is it about him that bothers you so much?" Ben says that it is Greg's hair. Felicity is incredulous but I know what Ben means. Greg's Einstein/chaos 'do does nothing for me. Ben mutters, "I don't know what it is." It's the hair and the med-student arrogance, in my case. Knoll arrives at the counter and Felicity asks how it went last night. Knoll declares it "complicated." Felicity offers to get him some coffee but Knoll has come to see Ben. Felicity indicates that Ben is "in the back room." There's another back room! Ben and Knoll talk, but since the audio is muted we'll never know if they're talking about Keri Russell's hair, how skinny Courtney Cox Arquette is, or what a bitch Gwyneth Paltrow is.
Felicity and Greg are working at the computer with only the light of the monitor and a desk lamp to guide them. He asks if Felicity and Ben are dating. She says no and asks why he asked. He says, "I don't know. I just figured, you know, I mean, you were pretty upset when he left, and that's the way he acts around you." Felicity doesn't know what he means and he says, "I don't know. It's just sort of a sense I got." Felicity asks if he is dating anyone and he says, "Uh, no, I was. Until last month. Eight months. A record for me." Felicity wonders what happened but his only answer is, "Nothing happened. I happened." He goes on to say, "I'm, uh, I'm no good. I'm a mess. Personally, I think anyone with a massively screwed-up past shouldn't be allowed in relationships. I mean, legally." She asks, "So what's your massively screwed-up past?" He responds, "Well, it's depressing enough in here. I'm not about to make the moment darker. " Run, Felicity, run! They continue working.
Ben and Knoll are playing basketball. Knoll asks, "I mean, if I walk away right now, I'd be totally justified wouldn't I?" Ben isn't sure. Knoll whines, "She cheated on me." Ben wonders, "You know, it sounds like when this happened you weren't totally together yet. Were you?" Knoll claims he is relieved, "Totally relieved. I mean, all the pressure's off. So why am I still so pissed off?" Ben asks him if he still likes Ruby. Knoll says, "I still care about her. What am I supposed to do, not care about her?" Ben the relationship guru opines, "Well, one thing that you definitely don't want to do is walk away too early, man, before you figure it all out. I mean, if you do that, you could regret it for a long time." Knoll wonders what he is supposed to do. Ben advises him to "shoot." Knoll shoots and scores. He's good at that -- ask Ruby. They continue to play.