D'Argo's being chained up as he mutters, "I cannot believe this is happening to me again." Well, once Chiana joined the crew, it was probably only a matter of time. However, it's Zhaan doing the chaining, and she exposits that this time, it's by his own volition. D'Argo: "Barely." Cut to Pilot telling us the reason for the deception, as a Peacekeeper ship is approaching, although he's able to tell from the markings for certain that it's not from Crais's command carrier. I certainly don't have to tell any of you that there will be plenty of time for Crais later. D'Argo growls that they could, you know, fight the Peacekeepers, but Zhaan suggests they try it Crichton's way. When she's gone, D'Argo repeats, "Crichton's way," in a tone that suggests he thinks said way is going to turn out about as well as Carlito's. It's almost like he's seen the rest of the season already.
Zhaan grunts that Rygel can't have his Thronesled if the plan is to work. She wrestles it away from him, and while Claudia Black deserves all the credit she gets in the forums for her puppet chemistry, Virginia Hey's ability to make a tug-of-war with a puppet look convincing isn't too shabby either. Also, said puppet is none too pleased.
Dramatic music plays as we see someone getting into a rather hot-looking red and black leather Peacekeeper uniform. Said someone is Aeryn, who runs a hand over the PK insignia, a subtle gesture that speaks volumes. Less subtle is her hoisting of a gun so big that Godzilla would think twice about fucking with her, but that gesture too sends a certain message.
After an exterior shot of a ship hurtling toward Moya and seemingly leaking something as it does, Zhaan informs Pilot that they're ready, and he closes the doors to the confinement cells, which are back to housing D'Argo, Rygel, and Zhaan. Given the expressions of consternation on Zhaan and D'Argo's faces, I guess it's no wonder that no one busted out with a rendition of "The Way We Were." Rygel, though, manages to look the height of imperiousness, which is impressive for more than one obvious reason. But you know, the fact that I made an offhand joke about "The Way We Were" in an episode that mentions experiments in Leviathan control and features Aeryn's and a hot Peacekeeper's mutual attraction makes me think my unconscious is doing more work on these recaps than I realize. Thank God it's good for something other than all those nightmares from which I wake up screaming.
The Peacekeeper ship comes in for a landing, opening-credits-style, but before it touches down, its occupants jump out and land on the floor with weapons at the ready. I'm not doing it justice, but it's a rather fake effect that still manages to look very cool. The hangar doors open, and Aeryn, enormous gun leveled, calls for them to identify themselves. A good-looking male Peacekeeper, pulse pistol trained on her, asks for her ID. The conversation does not continue, "I asked you first." "I asked you second! Two is more than one!" Of course, that's probably only because we haven't seen Crichton yet. Aeryn verbally gives her ID, and the guy says his name is "Larraq," and his assignment's none of her business. He's feeling confident since he's got several backup Peacekeepers around him. I'd still bet on Aeryn, though, and even without The Gun That Saved Tokyo. Larraq explains that his Marauder has a fuel leak, and it's lucky they found her. Aeryn's sardonic smile is priceless: "You think?" Seriously, dude, you have no idea. Larraq skeevily says it's a big ship for one little girl, and Aeryn's smile goes even harder: "I can handle big." And given that the show typically takes every possible opportunity to increase our love and lust for Crichton, who do you think would be good to cut to off that line?
Well, regardless of what you think, he's coming in, dressed in the same scorching leather outfit as Aeryn. He tells Aeryn to put down her weapon, and when she hesitates, stresses, "That is an order." Only he says so in the most atrocious English accent I have EVER heard. I know Browder lived in London for a while, so I can only imagine he's doing this to be funny. Because if this is the best he can do, I... well, let's just say I might even start to be unimpressed by Crichton in leather, because the accent is THAT BAD. I may have to take back my statement from the last paragraph. Anyway, Larraq, not cowed by Crichton's ersatz captaincy, says that he and his team are on a "Priority Red" mission, and shows them a tag that looks like the one I use to get into the gym, only instead of a bar code, it's got a Pac-Man on it. Well, it's probably the Peacekeeper insignia, but take a look if you don't believe me. Larraq's point is, that under some provision of the Peacekeeper code, he's taking command over Moya, its crew, and -- he levels his pistol at Crichton -- "you." Yes, please take command of that accent and whip it into shape. Credits.
When we come back to the same tableau, Crichton is all, "Oh, I think not." Dude, Henry Higgins would hear his delivery of those four words and throw up his hands all, "There's nothing I can do." But the DRDs apparently can, as several of them start a little laser crossfire that sends the Peacekeepers to the floor. When the demonstration is over, they warily get back on their feet as Crichton points out that they need his help.
Aeryn and Crichton are showing Larraq the "prisoners." Larraq notes that Zhaan is quite attractive, and even though Zhaan's probably plotting his death, there's precedent for thinking he's got a chance for a roll in the hay first. Larraq then moves to regard D'Argo as he goes over the story Aeryn and Crichton told him, which is that they recaptured the prisoners on a "new technologies training flight." Aeryn adds that "NewTech" has been experimenting with Leviathan mastery without the use of control collars, and Larraq is intrigued, so Crichton tells him that they have neural control over Pilot, and Pilot controls Moya. He asks Larraq what his mission is, but Larraq tells him he doesn't have the clearance to know anything about it. However, clearance or not, he does tell him that he has one crate he's got to get back into Peacekeeper control, and it's top priority, so he'll give Crichton the coordinates of their base, which is only twenty arns away. Aeryn quickly notes that that must mean the base is in the Uncharted Territories. Larraq: "It's a new Gammak base. Secret. Need-to-know only." The prisoners look chagrined, as well they might. I mean, not only are they in much greater danger of being recaptured, they've just realized that all those times they said "Uncharted Territories," they were employing a misnomer.
In the cargo hold or whatever, the female Peacekeeper objects to how roughly the two plug-uglies are handling "the Captain's prize." Chiana appears with a small tray and asks if she can approach. The bald one is all, "Get as close as you want, darling." Translator microbes everywhere: "[Eye-roll]." Chiana explains there's food in the center chamber, and that "the Captain" ordered her to attend to them, prompting the bald guy, whose name is "Thorrn," to appreciatively note that Crichton has a non-regulation servant/implied concubine. So the whole Peacekeeper purity thing is even more hypocritical than we thought. I'm so shocked that I can't even clutch my pearls. I can still manage to type, though -- isn't it funny how that works? The blonde Peacekeeper is not having the slightest bit of this, and tells the "Sergeant" that she wants to check the contents of the crate, "now." Thorrn produces a key, causing a circular lock to rotate and some air to escape the apparently vacuum-sealed container. Chiana watches with interest, and then Thorrn tells her that he's been out with just "my Captain and these two" for nearly a full cycle. Chiana's all, "You're horny? Yeah, I can work with that." After a bit of flirtation, she "accidentally" spills some liquid on the dude's pants, and makes a big show of wiping it off personally. Thorrn doesn't mind at all, but Blondie is all, "Food in the center chamber? Got it. Now leave us." Hee. Chiana obeys, but once she's out of sight, we see her unfold her towel to reveal that she made an impression of Thorrn's key with some malleable material she had with her. She snarks, "Too easy." Another missed playground-ism: "I know you are, but what am I?"
Center chamber. Aeryn and Larraq enter to find the two three other Peacekeepers chowing away. Aeryn, noting with distaste that they failed to show any deference to the Captain's entrance, sniffs that they don't pay attention to rank. Larraq, with some amusement, says that his crew will die at his command, without question. "But make them stand up just because I walk into a room? I respect them too much for that." The crew's all, "Yeah, that's nice, but about the whole 'dying at your command' thing... " Larraq segues into asking if Aeryn's come across Special Ops before, and she tells him everyone of her rank has heard of them. He asks what it is they call his people, and she supplies, "Black Ghosts." The conversation continues with Aeryn looking down her nose at the Black Ghosts' "unkempt uniform(s) and the undisciplined attitude." In short, Aeryn's become the England to the Black Ghosts' Australia. And it's about time someone represented England, since Crichton isn't doing the job at all. Another upshot: These two kind of like each other.
Crichton releases D'Argo's chains as D'Argo snarls, "This sham is over." Obviously he shares my opinion of the accent. After a bit of exposition that the uniforms Crichton and Aeryn are wearing were left behind by the Peacekeepers, Zhaan suggests that perhaps D'Argo is right and they should strike while they still have the element of surprise, especially since Moya is in the late stages of her pregnancy. Crichton counters with the point that they should learn all they can from the Peacekeepers, particularly since they don't even know if the base to which they're heading is the only one in the area. D'Argo: "I can tell you one thing for free: I will not be chained up again." Heh. Also, he's not having the door locked. Zhaan goes to run all this by Rygel, but he's gone, having used his secret escape route, so Crichton suggests they find him before he screws everything up. D'Argo: "Yeah, let's find him before you screw it up." Nanny nanny boo boo! Also, hee.
Crichton, Zhaan, and D'Argo are heading off to find Rygel when they hear a Peacekeeper coming. They hastily retreat, and Zhaan helpfully locks herself in, but D'Argo balks at putting the chains back on, and Crichton, rather than duck out and close the door so there's a chance they'll get away with this, idiotically stands there saying D'Argo's name in a "You're not getting dessert until you eat your peas" voice. Thorrn appears and sees what's going on, so D'Argo fakes attacking Crichton. Thorrn rushes in and whacks D'Argo off Crichton, and he and Crichton slide out and close the door ahead of D'Argo savagely rushing them. Thorrn, pleased with himself, says that Crichton's lucky he happened along. Crichton, for his part, threatens to bring Thorrn up on charges if he ever lays his hands on him again. I assume Aeryn briefed him on Peacekeeper etiquette, but GOOD GOD, the accent. David Boreanaz is all, "The badness of my "Irish" accent is nothing compared to this," and he is absolutely right. Also, in Thorrn's defense, you heard how horny he is -- can you really blame him? Once Crichton and Thorrn are gone, Zhaan compliments D'Argo's performance, but he's in no mood to hear it.
Back in the Center Chamber, Larraq asks Aeryn if she's ever flown anything "sexier" than a Leviathan. Aeryn does not say, "This one time? At flight camp?" She does, however, list her early flying history, ending at flight school at sixteen cycles. Larraq asks why she waited so long, and Aeryn smiles as she confesses that until then, her feet wouldn't reach the pedals. Heh. And normally, I'd be a little annoyed at Aeryn paying attention to this interloper, but I can't really blame her, given that (a) this guy is hot, and (b) Crichton is running around talking like the Queen's retarded cousin's retarded cousin. Aeryn asks about the thing in the crate, and they flirt a bit more, but Larraq gets serious as he tells her to stay away from it. Aeryn takes in the fairly obvious fact that he's primarily saying that for her protection, not the cargo's, and then shifts gears as she notes that he's got a stasis gun, which is for "capture, not killing." At Larraq's silence, she notes that a Gammak base is "science-military," and wonders if it's wise to take the thing there. Larraq opines that science-military is perfect. "Let them deal with it."
Speaking of "it," we get a glimpse of the sarcophagus-like crate...
... and then Chiana, with the help of a DRD, is fashioning a key from the impression she took...
... and then Rygel's examining the crate when Chiana enters. Rygel's startled, and snarks that he should have her wear a bell around her neck. Chiana: "Keep your fantasies to yourself." Rygel gags at the idea of having a fantasy about Chiana, but Chiana calls him out as the puppet that doth protest too much. And somewhere, William Shakespeare has just about had it.
Thorrn tells Larraq he's going to check out the cargo bay. Personally, I think Larraq should take what he can get if he's going to ogle Aeryn rather than help in the search. Not, as usual, that I necessarily blame him.
Rygel babbles some more, and Chiana, not having it, tells him he's there for the same reason she is -- to see if there's anything worth "snurching." Write your own joke about Chiana's snurch here. Rygel: "I don't snurch. I... procure." Hee. Chiana suggests they split whatever's inside, to which Rygel objects, since he was there first. Chiana's possession of the key, however, causes him to agree to the even split. I think these two really do like each other, because otherwise I don't know what's keeping Chiana from using Rygel to practice her kickball skills. Chiana inserts the key, and a smaller container slides out of the first one. Rygel totally wusses out, so Chiana opens it, noting that it's hot. Inside is a really ugly rubber alien that looks like a cross between E.T. and a battery chicken. Now I just made myself want to go vegetarian. If history is any indication, though, that urge will pass.
Thorrn approaches.
Chiana asks Rygel if he recognizes the species. Rygel: "Even if I did, I wouldn't admit it." Hee. He just has no idea that he's not exactly the fairest of them all either, and God love him for it. Chiana says that whatever it is, it's still alive, but they don't get much farther than that before they hear Thorrn at the door...
... who enters after Chiana and Rygel have hidden, and draws his gun upon seeing the crate open. He kneels down by it, which doesn't seem like a great idea, but I could buy that he doesn't know the full details of the cargo they're carrying. Something seems to incapacitate him as he touches the creature, but he's recovered by the time the other male Peacekeeper flunky enters. He tries to call Larraq, but doesn't get far before Thorrn shoots him dead. Also, Larraq didn't have his earpiece on to hear the warning that Thorrn was about to shoot him, so it's nice that that loyalty to the death he was bragging about earlier went to such good use. Pilot reports the weapons fire to the "prisoners," and D'Argo, Qualta blade in hands, orders Pilot to open the cell door.
Back in the cargo bay, Thorrn, with a maniacal look, chokes the battery chicken to death. As if those things didn't have it rough enough already.
Aeryn and the two other Peacekeepers head for the cargo bay.
Rygel panics and runs off. Chiana hisses at him, presumably because she's too big to follow him, but Thorrn hears her, and soon he's got her out in the open. He raises his gun, but then -- presumably realizing that if he were to kill her, he'd be the likely suspect -- he changes tacks and lays one on her. And of course, if anyone was going to get this disease through a sexual act, it's Chiana. Anyway, Thorrn gets all stupid again, while Chiana's eyes glow green. She head-butts Thorrn into unconsciousness.
Outside, the rescue party has reached the door. Inside, Chiana's about to snap Thorrn's neck, but she hears the team coming. Aeryn enters and quickly sees the dead chicken, and asks what's going on. Larraq tensely tells her, "It's escaped." From behind them, Crichton asks, "What has escaped?" My hopes that you'd abandon that travesty of an accent before the end of Act Two. Also, the thing that's currently inside green-eyed Chiana, who's watching from the shadows.
After the break, Aeryn finds Thorrn unconscious, but Larraq warns her not to touch him. As Thorrn gets to his feet, Larraq explains that the fugitive they're after is an "intellant" virus, and was using the rubber chicken as a host when they isolated it. Exposition continues, letting us know that when Larraq and Co. caught the virus, it could only infect one host at a time, but once it gets a chance, it'll lay its spores. Thanks, Larraq. Not only are we getting one of those explanations that's really an "explanation," but you gave Crichton the impetus to "repeat," "Spohhhhwwwwzzzz." Like I said, "thanks." We wrap up with the information that if the virus is in the same host for an arn or more, it can lay a couple million spores, and then, according to Aeryn, "this whole end of the galaxy is in some serious frelling dren." The good news is that the virus isn't airborne -- it can only jump hosts through physical proximity. Thorrn doesn't remember anything about what happened, and then Chiana chooses this moment to pop out of her hiding place. Even if, as seems likely, she had no exit other than into the room, I'm not sure why she didn't bide her time and try to wait out the arn. She could always pretend to be unconscious if they happened to find her, which doesn't seem all that likely to have happened. Anyway, Chiana spins a yarn pointing the finger at Rygel, and the Peacekeepers disperse to try to find him. Crichton, after far too much re-exposition of what we just heard, thinks perhaps it's time to end their charade, but Aeryn warns him that the Peacekeepers will shoot at anything they don't trust, and basically bites out that the whole situation is a fiasco. "It is a grave misfortune that uniform did not fit me." I take that to mean she would have sided with Zhaan and D'Argo on the issue of jumping the Peacekeepers while they had the chance. Or maybe she simply gets nastier under pressure, but I've never heard of anything like that happening. Aeryn leaves, and Crichton tells Chiana to stick with him, as she'll be safer that way. Chiana smiles to herself, and we hear a snake's rattle on the soundtrack for the legions of us that were thinking the virus was suddenly going to turn over a new leaf.
The Peacekeepers are searching when D'Argo, with Zhaan at his side, shoots at them from around a bend in the corridor. The Peacekeepers are about to rush the "prisoners" when Crichton tries the gambit of yelling out about the situation on the ship. Chiana, for her part, is in the back of the crowd, unwatched, and given that we know she's so good at hiding, I really don't understand why she doesn't just take off for the (now less than an) arn and lay the goddamn spores. Maybe she can't bear to leave before she figures out what part of England Crichton's trying to make like he comes from. Anyway, everyone reluctantly lowers their weapons and agrees to the plan.
Cut to the Peacekeepers briefing the rest of the group. The blonde tells them that the virus's best defense is to jump from one host to another until nobody knows who it's in, and then to wait and lay its spores. And yet Chiana continues to hang around. Zhaan asks if there's a test for its presence, and is told that a host will show signs of high acidity, but only after the virus leaves its body. Not only do I think this plot is preposterous, it also bears certain similarities to the Star Trek: TOS episode "Wolf In The Fold," which is not exactly a good thing. Yet, the dramatic tension works for me overall. What is it about this show? Anyway, they split up into groups of two, and stress no physical contact with Rygel. You know, this group really is pretty thick not to entertain the possibility that Chiana could be the host here, ESPECIALLY the Peacekeepers, who supposedly have such experience with the virus. It's like, "Rygel's got the virus because Chiana says so!" "Is that that same Chiana who told us a story about a Muppet overpowering a Peacekeeper, which is also a story that no one else happened to witness?" "Um... " It just goes to show you that that old Luxan saying had it right: When you assume, you make an eema of you and me. Or something.
Pilot reports to Crichton that the DRDs can find no trace of Rygel. Well, they were quite useful earlier, so they get a pass. Plus, they're adorable. After some shots of pairs searching, we cut to the blonde Peacekeeper (named "Hassan") telling Zhaan that the virus leaves behind a mild hallucinogenic, rendering its hosts incapable of remembering their possession, or whatever. I mean, so preposterous. With all the weapons at its disposal, we're to believe that this thing routinely has trouble inhabiting the same host for a measly arn? It should have wiped out the entire galaxy by now! Unless "intellant" means "lazy as all get out," which is possible, considering it's not a word and all. All right -- enough said about this storyline. No promises on the accent, though. Zhaan tells Hassan that an entire Delvian colony was once wiped out by an intellant virus, and she lost family to it. Hassan keeps looking around for Rygel, so Zhaan sighs, "Sorry to bore you." Well, she does have something on her mind, here. And that's good, because letting your guard down seems to result in gory deaths among female Peacekeepers, but it looks like that won't happen here.
Crichton and Chiana enter an access shaft. Lingering shot on Chiana, rattler sound, OH MY GOD SHE'S POSSESSED WE GET IT. Although I think it would be funny if Crichton realized Chiana was possessed because the virus made her act more demure than usual. Like, "Wait, you're wearing underwear? VIRUS ALERT!"
Aeryn and Larraq. Aeryn asks the valid question of why they didn't kill the virus, and Larraq tells her that wasn't the mission. Aeryn asks why they would do such a thing, as if the whole concept of the Gammak base doesn't scream "biological warfare" louder than that rubber chicken's death cry. Wake up, sister. Aeryn wonders at the price, as Larraq has to this point lost four members of his crew, and again, her whole "Peacekeepers behave how, now?" attitude seems totally ridiculous. Suffocate rubber chickens if you must, but don't suffocate us with the exposition, please.
D'Argo and Thorrn enter an access shaft.
Crichton tells Chiana that the arn is almost up, like, no kidding. Just then, Aeryn reports that they've found Rygel. He's hiding in some small vent or something, and Larraq trains the stun gun on him. Aeryn tells Larraq that Rygel is trapped, but he doesn't seem to have a clear shot at him. Oh my God, here are Chiana and Crichton, and WHY DIDN'T SHE SLIP AWAY? I mean, I know with sci-fi, complaining about errors of logic is like returning Swiss cheese to the supermarket and complaining about the holes. But still. I mean, here's a thought: she goes to see Pilot, jumps to him, and uses his control over Moya to cut off life support, killing everyone on board. Then they head for the nearest heavily populated planet. Sound good? Is that "intellant" enough? Anyway, Rygel yells that he wasn't the only one there, and meanwhile, Chiana, thinking no one's watching her, behaves in a very intellant-virus-like way, causing Crichton to look at her funny. Larraq of course stuns Rygel right before he can say who else was there, and then we see Zhaan look behind her and see Crichton and Chiana acting weirdly, because the virus has chosen the moment it could lay the spores to jump to Crichton's body. The only bright side I can see is that it's got to be better at the British accent than Crichton is.
In a pedeconference, Zhaan says they must find a way to destroy the virus without killing Rygel, and D'Argo snits that it would be easier to do in her apothecary than in a locked cell. The virus tells them no by way of ad-libbing a Ghostbusters reference, and says he'll try to get the information they need out of Hassan. A reluctant D'Argo and Zhaan return to their cells, and D'Argo is locked in without incident, but before Crichton gets to do the same to Zhaan, Thorrn appears, so Crichton back-punches Zhaan in the face to make it look good, only he goes full force with it. Ouch. Zhaan, hurt in more ways than one, holds a hand to her nose as Crichton swaggers off.
In the cargo bay, Larraq locks Rygel in the crate as Aeryn duplicitously asks what will happen to Rygel once the virus is leeched out of him. Larraq says that Rygel is as good as dead, and Hassan adds that it's not a pretty process. And they know this how? It doesn't sound like they've captured a virus before, and obviously they never leeched the virus out of the rubber chicken, so how do they know that their process will even work? I'm going to borrow Keckler's "Not realistic, entertaining." I understand it's well-used in situations such as this. Hassan leaves as Larraq zips the dead Peacekeeper and the rubber chicken up in body bags, and then asks if Aeryn has ever thought about going Special Ops. Well, she hadn't before, but the competence with which this mission has been handled is certainly making her think... once. Larraq, though, thinks Aeryn's talents are being wasted, and plus, "I like the idea of having you nearby." Once again, can't really blame him. He chalks the unlikelihood of them serving together up to bad timing, and starts to leave, but Aeryn admits that timing has nothing to do with it. Larraq returns basically to offer her a job, and suggests they talk about it when they get to the Gammak base. I don't know whom I feel worse for -- Larraq, who's not going to make it to the Gammak base, or Aeryn, who totally will. Also, Larraq is pretty hot. Aeryn and I both wonder where the hell Crichton is.
Oh, here he is, with the stupid rattler of evil viruses accompanying him, sauntering in to see Hassan in the apothecary. I assume the virus is worried that Hassan will actually create an antibody to it with Zhaan's supplies, otherwise it could HOLE UP AND LAY THE DAMN SPORES. It still seems weak, but let's move on. Crichton takes a moment to be all spider to her fly, but then slams her head down on the table, grabs something heavy, and bashes her head in like an overripe cantaloupe. He gives the stun gun (which she had with her... why?) similar treatment, and saunters off, without disposing of the materials in the apothecary, so there goes even that flimsy reason. Also, yikes. Crichton is not going to be happy when he wakes up from this.
Zhaan and D'Argo are whispering about the location of the virus, and then Chiana shows up, saying that Pilot told her Zhaan wanted to see her. Basically, we can infer that between the suspicious behavior she witnessed while Rygel was being captured, combined with Crichton's not pulling his punch at all, Zhaan thinks that the virus was never in Rygel at all, but in Chiana. She asks Chiana to lick her bedcover, as it contains litmus fibers. First off, file that away for later, but more importantly, I wouldn't lick anything of Zhaan's unless I was sure she'd done laundry before her last exposure to bright light. The test quickly confirms that Chiana did host the virus, and D'Argo concludes that now it's not in Rygel, but someone else. This is a really tense storyline if you don't really pay attention to the details. I'll have to try that. Seriously, though, just about everyone's got things going on underneath the surface that makes this a very dark and complicated episode. Ironically, it's Crichton's last episode for a long time, if not ever, to behave like a big happy dork, so let's enjoy that while we can.
Aeryn bustles into Command and asks Pilot why their speed has increased. Pilot sardonically says it was the Captain's orders, so Aeryn turns to Crichton and asks if that's true, in a "What are you doing, you lunkhead?" undertone. Unfortunately, this is not an episode wherein Crichton is possessed of any subtlety concerning language. Crichton makes a show of saying that he wants to get to the base and take care of the virus as soon as possible. When Larraq moves out of earshot, Aeryn hisses at Crichton, asking what he's doing. Crichton bites out that he's doing what a commander in his situation would do, so she can just shut up. He then talks to Larraq, and I'm just going to assume that the spores don't exist at all or simply aren't important to the virus, because otherwise it wouldn't make much sense for it to start a conversation that's half a step away from amounting to "I'm an intellant virus! Ask me how!" Just then, Thorrn rushes in with the report of Hassan's death. Crichton starts to move for a gun, but D'Argo and Chiana rush in with weapons of their own. Larraq draws his pistol, but Aeryn slaps it away and kicks Thorrn's gun, causing him to miss the "prisoners." God, she's awesome. Zhaan appears and accuses Crichton of harboring the virus. A short melee ensues, and I guess everyone forgot the directive about avoiding physical contact, but again, it is Crichton we're talking about. Zhaan, realizing she touched Crichton, breathes, "Oh, no." If you think about it, that pretty much rules her out. A large Mexican standoff ensues, and Crichton dumbly asks what they're all looking at. Zhaan explains that the virus is in one of them. Of course, they should give Crichton the acid test to be sure that the virus isn't pulling a double-cross here, but it's not like they have reason to believe that the thing is tricky at all.
When we get back, everyone is yelling at the top of their lungs. It's rather amusing. Other good news: Crichton has finally dropped the accent. Zhaan explains to "John" what happened, and Larraq asks what's up with "this 'John' dren." D'Argo: "That topic is off at the moment." Maybe it's the moderator in me, but that's got to be the line of the episode. Crichton asks if the virus can reenter someone who's hosted it, and the answer is no, so Crichton gets Chiana to his side, as they're the safe ones. Of course, Rygel could tell them that Thorrn is off-limits as well, but he might be in a bit of a mood after being stunned and put on ice, so to speak. He'll at least need a cookie and an ear massage. Crichton asks about the stun gun, and is told that he destroyed it. He doesn't really need much more bad news at the moment, so it's just as well he doesn't think to ask where Hassan is. D'Argo pipes up that Zhaan volunteered to make an antidote, so they all move out.
In the apothecary, Zhaan slaves away as everyone else holds their weapons at the ready. Crichton's staring at Hassan's corpse, and you'd think if the Peacekeepers could spare a body bag for the rubber chicken, they could do something about their fallen comrade on the floor. Chiana consoles Crichton, and I'm really impressed with the depth they've given her in so short a time, because it's almost like she needs to believe in his goodness even more that he does. Zhaan finishes up the brew and injects herself, but nothing happens. She tells the others that "an acid-based life form" would have a noticeable reaction to the level of alkaline. I assume she's not talking about the writers, not that being an acid-based life form in that sense is necessarily a bad thing. Everyone's apparently wised up a bit, as they seem to be wondering whether Zhaan could be lying through her teeth, but she protests that they all saw the ingredients she put in, and Crichton, the other scientist, backs her up. Aeryn steps up to take the injection, and she too is clean, so she gets to cross the room like Crichton just picked her for his softball team. They would totally kick ass, too. Thorrn takes the one, and he, as we already knew, is clean, although... wouldn't the residual acid from his turn as the host react with the alkaline? Eh, it's not worth wondering about, as it's the David of plot holes amid a colony of Goliaths. Now that it's down to Larraq and D'Argo, everyone starts yelling again. Larraq yells that they should just test D'Argo to prove it's him so they can kill him, which betrays him as the host, since the real Larraq wants to capture the virus, not that anyone notices. Crichton makes a big show of playing "eeny meeny miny mo," and I was all for the elementary-school stuff, but even in kindergarten I was able to predict who I was going to land on, especially with FOUR SYLLABLES AND TWO PEOPLE. Anyway, Crichton injects D'Argo, who, after a second, is fine, so Larraq runs out ahead of everyone shooting at him. It's too bad the DRDs weren't around for this one. Crichton orders Pilot to cut off Larraq's possible escape routes, and we see doors closing all over the place.
Thorrn and Aeryn are looking for Larraq. Aeryn soon finds him, though not the way she wants, as he jumps out and grabs her from behind. He tells her that Larraq's body will get him into the Gammak base, and then Thorrn appears, and Larraq shoots him dead. His crewmen must be taking some crap in the afterlife for their trust in him. Crichton and D'Argo rush in behind Thorrn, and Larraq makes to shoot them as well, but Aeryn manages to knock his gun away. However, he draws a ginormous knife and tells Crichton that he knows from his time inside him and Chiana how much he and his crew want to stay away from the Gammak base, so all they have to do is let him go in the Marauder and they'll be free. If the virus knows so much about the thoughts of the people it inhabits, you'd think it might have picked up on THE FUEL LEAK THAT BROUGHT THEM THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE. D'Argo growls about the spores that I no longer care about, and then Aeryn yells for Crichton to do what he has to do. Larraq cruelly tells Aeryn that the real Larraq "really liked you. A lot." He then raises the knife and stabs Aeryn in the side. You guys, I'm starting to think that "intellant" means "asshole." Seriously, that was really hard to watch for a lot of reasons, but the terror on Aeryn's face as she looks at Crichton, afraid that the end has come for them far too soon, is definitely the worst part. Crichton and D'Argo get all slo-mo with the "AERYN!" and Larraq pitches her into their arms and rushes off. D'Argo, probably knowing that he's the one in this situation that has to think clearly, orders Crichton to go after Larraq, since he can't be re-infected. Crichton obeys, and D'Argo yells to Chiana and Zhaan that Larraq is headed to the transport hangar, and I love the fact that Chiana instantly understands that she's meant to go down there, since she's immune as well. D'Argo desperately begs Zhaan to get down there and help him as Aeryn writhes in bloody pain.
Soon after, Chiana jumps on Larraq's back, and he throws her off, but in grabbing him, she rips of his Peacekeeper ID card or whatever. Let's all take a moment to imagine what would have happened if not for that little occurrence. (Another reason this episode is both better and harder to watch knowing what happens after -- the might-have-beens and might-not-have-beens. Count them! I'll wait.)
Larraq fires up the Marauder. Crichton comes upon a still-half-dazed Chiana, who manages to order Pilot to seal the outer doors. Crichton belays that order, and asks if the ship is still leaking fuel. Upon hearing an affirmative, Crichton tells Pilot to let Larraq go, and we see the Marauder depart. Crichton tells Pilot to prepare for starburst, and over Pilot's objection, says that he only needs the first stage. "And I want this ship nose to tail where she is, one hundred and eighty degrees, right now!" He's a lot more authoritative with his normal accent. Pilot obeys, and, when the ship is in position, starts the first stage of starburst. The energy from Moya causes the leaked fuel to ignite, and a very cool shot of the flames overtaking the ship ensues, culminating in the ship exploding as Crichton intones, "Boom." I guess it was too much to hope for a "Yippee-ky-ay, motherfreller." Also, the shot is cool enough and we're close enough to the end that I won't even wonder about the flames merrily dancing their way through oxygenless space.
Zhaan is attending to a predictably pissy Rygel, but D'Argo enters to rumble that Rygel can expect less than no sympathy from him, due to his compliance in letting the virus loose. Zhaan cuts in that she's sure Rygel has learned his lesson. I'm not sure what she's basing that on, but we've got a lot of ground to cover in these last couple of minutes, starting with the fact that D'Argo is holding the chains from his cell in his hand. He tells Zhaan he'll never be chained up again, and she says she prays that will be the case. D'Argo: "You can pray all you like. I was expressing a fact, not a hope." Dude, I realize that this part of your personal journey is important, so I'll forgive the overdrama, but we already knew how you feel, so could we get to the beautiful stab victim already? No, Zhaan has to express her sympathy, and then Rygel has to fogey his complaint that he knew Crichton's plan would never work. Zhaan smells bullshit, and snarks that maybe time they'll follow a plan of Rygel's. D'Argo intones that he prays (oh, it's okay for you now?) that there will never be a time. They all bow their heads. Sigh. Another down ending -- oh, wait, there's one more scene left! Hope springs eternal!
Crichton is mid-vigil at Aeryn's bedside when she comes to. It's significant and heartbreaking that he's holding the weapon he used to kill Hassan. Of course, it's probably best that he had the experience of committing a horrible act while under the influence of someone else. I wouldn't want him to be totally unprepared for Harvey. Aeryn's relieved that the virus is dead, but Crichton has to break the news that Larraq shared the same fate. Aeryn stares into space and recalls that he stabbed her. Crichton: "You got lucky. He missed your heart." Yup, happy ending! And I'm sure Aeryn's response of "Closer than you think" isn't important at all! After Crichton exposits that he still doesn't know what the Gammak base is all about, Aeryn asks what he's doing in there, as if there's any other place in the entire universe that he'd rather be at the moment, including home. Crichton hems and haws until Aeryn, fixing him right in the eyes, says, "Thank you." Crichton can't meet her gaze as he tells her not to mention it, and Aeryn asks, "Why would I ever mention it?" Well, at least we know the Sebacean sense of humor isn't located in the paraphoral nerve. If by the merest chance you don't get that joke, you will time. See you then!