Episode Report Card Heathen: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT If I Should Fall From Grace
By Heathen | Season 8 | Episode 7 | Aired on 11.07.2001
Grace sips from a paper cup and tries to be blasé about her fall. "I must be dehydrated," she laughs mirthlessly. "All I've had is coffee and a muffin since last night." She's had that excuse ready since she scammed the last hospital. Susan and Carter totally call her out on the cutting, and aren't terribly impressed by her Neecole-worthy sob story about neglectful parents, high-school geekdom and eating disorder, and her subsequent addiction to the idea of becoming a doctor. It's all very involved and delivered with minimum passion. Grace is a totally hollow character, so if they do end up bringing her back at some point, I hope the actress corrects that. She's a cold fish. A weird duck. A strange bird. And don't get me started on what she does to the badger's previously unsullied reputation. After lengthy protestations, Grace hikes up her sleeve and lets them peek again at her arm scars, but she remains blasé about them. "Grace, you have a fever and a borderline white count," he tells her, speculating that she's gotten an infection, perhaps from a dirty blade. When she tries to blame her condition on hunger, Susan asks, "So the eating disorder continues?" Grace is a bad liar. She backtracks that she's been cramming for exams, leaving little time for cramming food into her mouth. Her eyes dart nervously between the two doctors. Narrowing his eyes, his whole face falling in dismay, Carter quietly requests that Grace lift up her skirt. "Pardon me?" she gapes. Susan waits until Grace is firmly entangled in a spat with Carter, then yanks up her skirt to reveal one deep fresh cut above her knee, and several smaller ones around it. "You ASS!" shrieks Grace, covering herself up and grabbing her backpack. They detain her, with Carter going so far as to threaten to put her on a Psych hold -- unless she agrees to sit down and be honest, they'll get Security to bar her from leaving, on the grounds that she's a danger to herself. Grace wriggles away, but Susan accosts her. "Stop!" Grace wails. "You're blowing this way out of proportion." Gallant arrives, intrigued. "Why are you doing this?" Grace moans. "Because I know what it's like to need help when you least want it," Carter quietly confesses. Grace begs to be left alone, but her cool veneer has cracked, and it begins a rapid crumble the minute she spots Gallant watching the confrontation with interest. "What are you staring at?" she spits, irate. "You couldn't even diagnose thrombocytopenia." Guilty, Gallant averts his gaze. Susan calls for five ccs of Dropiderol. "No, no, no no, stop," screams Grace, sinking into a real tailspin and sagging slowly to the ground, hands flailing, face contorting and acting very much like a Popstars reject. "Don't touch me, don't TOUCH me! Please, please, you'll ruin everything!" Gallant gingerly approaches with the needle of medicine, and Grace whimpers in protest but lacks the strength to fight it. When the needle breaks through her skin, Grace weeps openly, hopelessly. Carter stands over her, exhaling tensely, having finally succeeded in teaching the youth of America that ambitious people are insane.
We return from break to a very unpleasant sight indeed -- Rachel and Mark, positioned at the end of a very long hallway and headed straight for us. We should run. "Scissors, Rach?" he asks, disbelieving. "It's not like they said," whines Rachel. Apparently, she's being accused of threatening to stab Natalie Curtis with a pair of scissors, but Rachel helpfully explains that she was really just threatening to hack off the girl's dreadlocks. Mark doesn't take much comfort in this clarification, wondering aloud why his child would behave so monstrously. Mark, have you met yourself and Vulcan Jen? Her mom's a big bitch and her dad's a soggy rag of a man. Of course she's going to have enormous problems. Rachel complains that Natalie has been trying to steal Andrew away from her by sending him notes in class and inviting him over for study groups. "This is over a boy?" Mark gapes. "Trust me, Rachel, boys aren't worth the trouble. I should know." Except I think he only said that last bit to me, telepathically. Rachel blows off the situation, and manages to spit out a sassy remark about Gym class that rips a bit on how far removed Mark is from kids today. "Don't get smart with me, Rachel," he warns. Um, no real fear of that, I don't think. "You've been suspended," he reminds his daughter. "Next time, you might be expelled permanently." He takes great pains to emphasize "permanently," like, Mark, since when is an expulsion not permanent? Not many schools renege on those. That's why they differentiate expulsions from, say, suspensions. And, for good measure, shut up. Anyway, Mark puffs up with the sweet air of delusional courage and tells Rachel that this is the dawn of a new era, with a fresh set of rules. By my calculations, this era will last about 7.3 days. Even Rachel can't contain her disdain for Mark's proclamations of discipline. As they descend the school stairs, Mark forbids her from getting rides to school from anyone but him or Elizabeth, and grounds her for a month. He also assigns her chores. "I have chores now?" she squeaks. "She didn't have chores before?" I yelp. "You're Cinderella and I'm your evil stepmother," Mark announces. "I've already got one of those," she grumbles. Ha!
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