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The intrepid crew of the intrepid Enterprise fall across an intrepid old vessel with a moldering -- but nonetheless intrepid -- body inside. After several scans and jumping to conclusions, it turns out they have no idea who the festering frame really is. And even though the cadaver doesn't have a passport, several alien species are hot to get their hands on his cold body. While the crew puzzles this, Trip and Reed relive the best seconds of their lives and Quantum drops hints as broad as a bean that he wants to breed emotionless Vulclings with T'Pol. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Nothing happened in this episode. We started out with nothing, they threw in some nods to TOS and TNG, and we ended up with nothing. Try as I might, I could not find the tiniest speck of a plot. Plus? This is the sixteenth episode this season, and since I am neither a thaumaturge nor a dunce, I am BORED.
Speaking of speck, did you know that "speck" is a cooking fat used in the Veneto region of Italy? Well, it is. In fact, speck is smoked bacon, and can be a base for a special risotto and peas dish called "risi e bisi." I love that name. In fact, I love it so much I now use it as my meditation thingy -- "Die Bermaga Die" wasn't calming me down for some reason. The only drawback is now I can't keep Giovanni Ribisi's face from invading my "om" time.
Ship sees floating pod; ship annexes floating pod to perform invasive surgery on it in launch bay. When Malcolm Powder examines the Magical Mystery Pod, he can't tell the bow from the stern. I'm sure that's not the first time he's had that problem. Malcolm Powder goes over to a Wall o' Weapons (just like Principal Tiger Woods!) and gets a phaser out so they can crack that soft-boiled egg with the perfectly coddled center of noxious gas. Inside, Quantum finds a Six Feet Under celebrity corpse from Season One. T'Pol scans him to be human, even though I would argue that he looks Sulibanish.
Sick Bay. Phlox clearly just came from a poetry reading in SoHo, because otherwise? I can't explain his black Kevlar turtleneck or the mood lighting in a usually lite-brite Sick Bay. Phlox confirms that Corpus Chris T. is a human male, and twits Quantum for not being among the first humans to be out so far. "Whoever he is, he's rewritten our history books," Quantum comments peevishly. Wait, I didn't know Bermaga had a guest appearance on tonight's show! Quantum wonders if it could be Zephram Cochrane because, like Corpus Chris T., he was also in a one-man vessel when he Amelia Earhart-ed himself. Sadly, because Quantum wonders it in the FIRST TEN MINUTES of the show, we know it's not going to be true at the end, so all nocturnal emissions of "Metamorphosis" can now cease. "You know, I wonder if this is going to be a theme in this show -- every time they come across an unidentified human, Quantum's going to be all 'Are you my mother? Are you Zephram Cochrane?'" Mathra gripes.
Launch Bay. Reed and Trip dust the Magical Mystery Pod for Lord Technobabble's fingerprints. They solicit some pointless information from May-Running-To-Stand-Still, and the big conundrum squatting on their tiny brains is how the Magical Mystery Pod could make it out that far without engines.
Quantum's Quarters. Quantum gets nothing helpful out of Admiral "I'm So Boring I Must Turn Out to Be Evil To Justify My Repeated Presence On This Show" Forrest regarding Corpus Chris T.
Shuttle Bay. Reed and Trip dab around in the MMP's innards and find a glowing blue crucifix thingy. "It registers as some kind of bio-matter," Reed grunts. "Organic circuitry?" Trip clarifies for those of us who aren't bored. Using their Starfleet ratchets that fit curiously perfectly into MMP's sockets and stuff, they pull out the Bread and Circuits ["You realize no one outside of Boston is going to get that 'organic' reference, don't you?" -- Mathra] and take a closer look. It turns out the MMP has a false bottom. It's sort of like those plastic rocks you can hide your key in because no one would ever think to check a bogus-looking rock that's on your stoop to your front door. Actually, maybe it's more like those fake books that don't have pages but are really safes. Yes, I get the Lillian Vernon catalog -- why do you ask? Anyway, in their case, it's a loooong deeeep shaft. Trip drops something down the shaft to determine how far it goes and then heads after it. Reed frets about calling the Bridge to get their permission slips signed by Quantum, but Trip forges ahead into the Infinite Corridor. Reed reluctantly follows. Once in the MMP's basement, Trip comments, "I've read a few papers on spatial geometry but I never heard a theory that would explain this." "It's obviously a hyperbolic 3-manifold -- what papers were you reading? Ass," Mathra snorts from his octonionic calculations. They scan around and find possible evidence of a warp breach, and Malcolm Powder even detects a faint energy signature!
Bridge. Some Suliban in a non-combat ship are on an intercept course with Enterprise, and they tell Quantum they want to relieve him of the Magical Mystery Pod. Quantum is reticent to acquiesce, since the pilot is human and the vessel is from Earth. The Suliban charge weapons, and without batting a furrow, Quantum tells them to contact "a man named Silik" who will tell them he isn't easily threatened. Great, now I've got a Johnny Cash song in my head.
Magical Mystery Pod's basement. Reed and Trip futz some more and find what I think looks like a pile of dusty gold bricks. The ship shakes as a spiny lobster fires on them. Oh, wait, that's not my Normandy-Brittany class notes -- that's a new kind of Suliban ship. Cool.
Bridge. Quantum orders May-The-Refugee to return fire.
Shuttle Bay. Trip and Reed get out of the Infinite Corridor, try to comm the Bridge, and get attacked by falling Suliban. You know, when it comes right down to it, they're probably only slightly less painful than falling anvils. Reed fires at both of them, but only hits one. The other one runs up the stairs to the control room in order to push some buttons and fire at Reed. Malcolm Powder falls off the stairs as a result.
Bridge. Hoshi reports that someone is trying to open Launch Bay Two, and she can't prevent it. Since Quantum can't get hold of Trip -- notice that he doesn't even bother to contact Malcolm? -- he orders a security team to check it out.
Shuttle Bay. Reed continues his firefight with the remaining Suliban.
Bridge. Enteprise is in a firefight with the Spiny Suliban Ship. Quantum wants to grapple T'Pol. That is, he wants deploy the grapple on the Suliban ship in order to find out why they wanted the MMP. Yes, because all Fuchsia-Suited Suliban encounters have been so informative and non-injury-causing, haven't they? The Spiny Suliban Ship retreats and transports its two infiltrators off Enterprise just as Trip wakes up. How conveeeenient. Malcolm dashes up to the TOS-reminiscent control panel in the shuttle bay. In outer space, the Spiny Suliban Ship decloaks. Quantum does something with his brow that I just can't even bring myself to describe anymore. Suffice it to say, if there's a scene with Quantum on this show, he's Eternally Furrowing.
Quantum tells us that they've contacted a Vulcan ship called Valkyrie. And if that's not the real name, I don't want to know, because I like mine better, so don't email me. Anyway, the Vulcans have promised to meet them and ferry the MMP back to Earth for further dissection. Quantum hopes they don't run into the Suliban again before they reach the meeting point. When is he going to learn that that kind of talk just invites Fate to knock on his air-lock and ask if he wants to buy some brushes?
Situation Room. Trip presents the gold bricks and tells Quantum and T'Pol that they were heavily shielded in the MMP. "It might be the black box," Trip hazards. Just in case there are those of us out there who weren't alive in the last two years but can still somehow comprehend this dialogue, T'Pol explains that a "black box" might be able to tell them what happened with the MMP. Trip mentions Bread and Circuits again -- I have no idea what the hell "organic circuitry" really has to do with anything, and I really don't want to know -- and then tells Quantum he's gotta git him down that Infinite Corridor so he can see how far the shaft goes. I wonder if Darwin's Deli delivers Corned Beef Slash with a dill pickle this late. "Bigger on the inside?" Quantum asks. Yes, they do deliver! Phlox calls Quantum to tell him he needs to see him in Sick Bay ASAP. T'Pol and Quantum leave.
Sick Bay ASAP. Turns out Corpus Chris T. isn't a pure human. Going back several generations, Corpus Chris T is also Vulcan, Terrellian, and another species Phlox can't identify. Kitschen Confidential: There are these brilliantly purple shells you can find in Apulia, Italy that were ground up in ancient times and used as dyes. Because it took ten thousand shells to produce just one gram of dye, they were only used to purple the robes of the Roman emperors. However, in 314 A.D., Pope Sylvester I discovered the color purple and insisted on using the dye for all his vestments. Despots and the cloth, man -- maybe that's the origin of "purple prose." Horace called it the definitive imitation of the shade of violets. And you know, I don't really have a point except that the dye is called "Terranian Purple," and I always think of it when I hear the name "Terrellian." Maybe when we finally do meet the Terrellians, they'll turn out to be purple people. Quantum is flummoxed that a human can have Vulcan ancestors that go so far back when they only just met the Vulcans. Hello? "Carbon Creek," anyone? Phlox just repeats his findings, and Quantum calls T'Pol out of the room.
T'Pol and Quantum unhook the lo-jack on Daniels's quarters. God, Daniels's Time Traveler's Almanac is going to get thumbed though more than a stack of Reader's Digests in a public bathroom! How convenient to have something like that on board at your total and unchecked disposal. T'Pol doesn't think that Daniels would approve, but Quantum overrules her. They page through the microfischtion, and T'Pol sees a Vulcan cruiser she doesn't recognize. "That's because it hasn't been built yet," Quantum reminds her. GOD! Yes, it's O Fortuna's diary -- WE GET IT! Stop already. T'Pol decides to tell Quantum that, despite the anvil with pointed ears and a fanged teddy bear named Seth the Sehlat that just chewed through the bars of its cage, few Vulcans have ever chosen to mate with another species. "Worried about contaminating your genome with a little human DNA?" Quantum snipes. T'Pol alludes to "significant biological differences" between the two species. "It's unlikely we could reproduce," she concludes. Quantum does a double-take. Oh, go shave your ass, Quantum -- I knew what she meant even if your pisi brain didn't. "Humans and Vulcans," T'Pol clarifies.
They scan some more screens for the Magical Mystery Pod. "If a human and a Vulcan did have a child, I wonder if he'd have pointed ears," Quantum muses. I don't know -- did Spock have pointed ears? It's not clear to me. T'Pol gives Quantum a weird look. Quantum suddenly finds the MMP in The Time Traveler's Almanac. "Considering how many Ford models there were in the 1950s alone, that was unrealistically fast of them," says Mathra, taking a piece of garlic paper out of Hunca Munca's mouth. The freak is obsessed with to eating them. Hunca Munca, not Mathra. Quantum pays lip service to Daniels's group of time-travelling history majors, and we learn that the MMP is from the thirty-first century and powered by a "temporal displacement drive." I have this image of the writers inventing technobabble by cutting up pages of technobabble from past scripts and putting them together on a refrigerator like magnet poetry. Quantum worries that if the Suliban get their hands on the MMP, it could have an effect on the Temporal Cold War, and T'Pol wants to know why no one from the future has come to reclaim this S.S. Minnow of their time. May-Running-To-Stand-Still comms Quantum that there is an alien ship closing in on them, but it isn't Suliban.
A ship that looks like an inflated arrowhead follows Enterprise. Just another toy to add to my collection! Pretty cool design. Aside from T'Pol's wardrobe, I love the design department on this show.
Bridge. T'Pol determines that they are being tailed by the Tholians. "They're extremely xenophobic -- the High Command has had limited contact with them. Captain, it is unusual for the Tholians to travel this far from their system," T'Pol adds. Do you think there's a site out there called "The Tholian Web"? Oh, god, why did I even ask? Malcolm Powder reports "unusual thermal readings" from the Tholian ship's interior. "It's over two hundred degrees," he concludes. Maybe that's why they looked so weird? Because they were actually on fire? Wasn't there some flamey comic books character who dripped bits of fire everywhere -- the live torchiere or something? You know, I never understood why The Thing wore blue diapers. When you think of it, they're kind of like the Tick Underoos. Wow, look how my ramblings come full circle. Oh, and please DO NOT send me tons of emails with fun facts about the Fantastic Four -- I seriously don't care that much. Plus, Mathra has been babbling about them ever since I broached the subject and I'm just about fed up.
T'Pol points out that the Tholians aren't thought to be humanoid. Quantum opens a channel and tries to converse with the Tholians. His yoo-halloo is met with sounds from Sea World as the Tholians click and whistle back at him. In between the humpback songs, understandable English comes through in my ex-landlord's voice. The Tholians tell Quantum that they want the MMP, and inform him the vessel is dangerous to the humans because of "temporal radiation." T'Pol and Quantum exchange concerned looks. Yeah, um, some sort of decon might have been in order before opening the MMP and letting all of Corpus Chris T's nine-hundred-year-old farts out. Quantum refuses to let his toy go, so the Tholians slap a tractor beam on them. Malcolm Powder can't get his torpedo to work properly because of interference, and Quantum makes idle threats to destroy the ship if the Tholians don't release them. Finally, the Tholians let go of Enterprise and chunter off with a parting whale song that Hoshi doesn't think is complimentary. We don't get the human hearing range equivalent, so I choose to believe that they suddenly remembered they left their kettle on. Quantum wonders if there are any other species who might want to lay claim to the MMP.
T'Pol and Phlox break bread together. Phlox salivates over finding another nucleotide sequence in Corpus Chris T's genome that makes him part Rigellian. T'Pol is silent. Phlox salivates over his food. T'Pol is silent. Complete with an anecdote with the Denobulan first contact, Phlox illustrates to T'Pol why he thinks she should accept time travel as a fact. T'Pol makes it clear that she prefers to sleep with the Vulcan Science Directorate under her pillow in case any illogical thoughts go bump in the night. You know, as much as I enjoy every scene with Billingsly, I am vastly fatigued by these recurring scenes with him heavy-handedly prodding T'Pol to stop being so Vulcan and conform to another species' mindset.
Engineering. Trip and Malcolm Powder fiddle with stuff from the MMP and gabble about time travel. It turns out that Malcolm is a read-the-last-page-of-the-book in the When Harry Met Sally sense, but Trip prefers to leave more to the imagination. I wish he'd thought of that before he ran his chicken-skin carcass around the ship. Malcolm Powder does some more proving that he likes girls, but Trip scoffs at knowing who his true love is before it's temporally correct to know, and makes countless numbers of viewers swoon at being all romantical. Me? I just dived into a tub of gin and did some deep breathing. The Dynamic Do Not go to the Launch Bay to play with the MMP and discuss what past event they'd most like to witness. Trip would like to meet a stegosaurus. I'm not kidding, that's what he actually said. And are you surprised? I suppose he'd also like to have his first date be one where the only decision to be made is whether you club the girl before or after the stega-steaks. Malcolm Powder wants to see the Brits defeat the Spanish Armada in 1588. What? He wouldn't choose 1066? Come on, he could see Norman raping and pillaging, AND Haley's Comet! Suddenly, in a never-before-done plot twist, Trip and Reed relive that scene. At first I thought it was all that gin I inhaled, but when Trip anticipates Reed's date of choice being 1588, I realized what was happening. And then I went to inhale some more. Initially, Trip and Reed discount the déjà vu, but when it happens a second time (or third, depending on how you're counting), they get wigged.
Bridge. Phlox examines the repeat offenders as they tell him what they experienced, but he can't find anything wrong with them. Well, nothing out of the ordinary, that is -- in my opinion, Malcolm shouldn't do orange frosts. T'Pol discovers that the MMP is emitting something that might not agree with them, and Quantum brainstorms that it might be the temporal radiation the Tholians were warning them about. Reed reminds us that he and Trip have been hanging around the MMP a goodly amount of time, Phlox decides whatever they caught won't have lasting effects, and T'Pol supposes the temporal radiation could have affected their perception of time. "Or maybe they really were reliving the same moment," Quantum suggests. Like he knows better than a Vulcan science officer? Not bloody likely. Quantum wants the area around the MMP sealed off and evacuated. FINALLY! Idiot.
After dismissing the other three, Quantum and T'Pol have a little confab in his Ready Room. T'Pol's afraid the radiation could seep into other parts of the ship. Just get some duct tape and plastic sheeting, you'll be fine. Quantum sweeps her concern under his rug by saying that they'll soon be meeting up with the Vulcans in order to rid themselves of the meddlesome pod. As they've already had two "hostile species" on their asses, T'Pol doesn't think they'll survive that long. Quantum stubbornly thinks they can play Keep Away with the MMP, but T'Pol advises him to destroy it. "I'm not going to do that. I'm tired of these factions interfering with our century. It's time we took a more active interest in this war -- gathered some intelligence for ourselves!" Quantum tells her. They argue over whether they should storm the beach at Normandy -- er, "get involved," with Quantum being yay and T'Pol being nay. Guess who wins? As T'Pol does some stomping out, she reminds her captain that the Suliban could return cloaked, and recommends they go to tactical alert. Quantum nods before turning back to Windex his Weight Of The World Window.
Even though I pulled a ninety-six out of my ass on my huge Italian regional culinary exam, I forgot what region Prosecco came from. Bad Chef! So, as punishment tonight, I am drinking several cases of it. Bad Chef! But -- yum and bubbles.
Engineering. It turns out the black box isn't so much a record of the last actions of the vessel as it is an emergency beacon. Unfortunately, with all his fiddling, Trip managed to activate the subspace signature. Okay, how awesome would it be if the emergency beacon brought those "We seek PEACE-ful co-EXISTENCE!" creatures? I know it wouldn't make any sense, but the way that episode ended was just so thrillingly creepy that it's one of my biggest complaints against TNG that they never picked up that arc again. T'Pol comms that there is a bevy of Suliban pods headed for them.
Bridge. They all fly very fast. T'Pol tells Quantum that they are less than three minutes from meeting up with the Valkyrie. Do you think they'll take a ride on her? Hoshi follows orders to call the Vulcans and let them know there will be a lot more of them for dinner. Unfortunately, Hoshi can't get through to the Vulcans, but the Suliban are hailing them on the other line. A mottled face appears on the screen and orders them to drop their shields and prepare to be boarded. "Or what?" Quantum taunts. "You're not going to risk any more damage to that ship. Take a look at your long-range sensors, there's a Vulcan combat cruiser a few million kilometers from here. Unless you want to upset them, I SUGGEST you turn around!" The Suliban scoffs at the very idea of the Vulcans taking any risks for an Earth vessel. Cue the firefight. They are now only six hundred kilometers from the Vulcan ship -- can't the Valkyrie's long-range sensors sense what's going on with them? -- and the Suliban are trying to blast through the Launch Bay doors. Sizeable Suliban pod explosions. They're now close enough to the Vulcan vessel to drop out of warp. Unfortunately, they are not going to get the warm welcome they anticipated -- the Valkyrie looks completely dark and dead in the water. "Bio-signs?" Quantum strangles out. T'Pol reports that the crew is alive, but the ship is completely disabled, and Hoshi adds that their comm is down as well. Suddenly, four Tholian ships zip into view and head straight for Enterprise.
I think our local UPN affiliate screwed up again, because when we come back from commercial, the Enterprise is shaking and May-Bullet-The-Blue-Sky reports that the engines are down. Something must have happened before that -- it's a pity if I missed out on some Tholian whale singing. Basically, everything that could go offline on the ship does, and to top it all off, the Suliban pods catch up with them. Now everyone's shooting at everyone else. "I never thought I'd be glad to see the Suliban," Malcolm Powder breathes. Trip can't get immediate engines or weapons, so Quantum tells him to drop everything and get the MMP's emergency beacon working. Trip's confused. "Whoever built that ship might be able to send help," Quantum explains. Yes, in the form of bugs that burrow into your mouth and sprout a gill thing on your neck. T'Pol warns Quantum that whoever built the MMP probably won't reach them in time. Seriously! How tight was the strap on Quantum's water polo helmet? Quantum ponders this and talks to Malcolm Powder about manually arming the torpedoes. They decide to bring the warhead to the Launch Bay and play with it there. Quantum takes off with Malcolm Powder, leaving T'Pol in charge of the Bridge.
The Suliban and Tholians fight it out.
Using only a knitting needle and a Hallmark card, Malcolm and Quantum arm the torpedo warhead.
Engineering. Trip works on the emergency beacon.
T'Pol comms Quantum that the Suliban are losing the dogfight, so they don't have much time. "We're working as fast as we can -- stand by," Quantum tells her, and continues to play MacGyver. with Malcolm. In the cut, Malcolm Powder realized they're experiencing déjà poo brought on by the temporal radiation from the MMP. "If time's not repeating outside the Launch Bay, the Tholians could be close," Malcolm Powder observes. Close? They're right outside the window! Is he trying to say the Tholians might be close to being done making mottled mincemeat out of the Suliban, and can then turn their attention to blasting Enterprise? Or is he trying to say that the Tholians haven't reached Enterprise yet? Because in the second case, he would make absolutely no sense, since he just acknowledged that time isn't necessarily in repeats on the rest of the ship. I need to add crème de cassis to my Prosecco. Quantum and Malcolm Powder get back to work.
Bridge. T'Pol leans over May-Van-Dieman's-Land as he tells her the Suliban cell ships have been destroyed. "How many?" T'Pol asks. May-All-Along-The-Watchtower looks up dramatically: "All of them." Hoshi looks over in concern. May-Angel-Of-Harlem reports that the Tholians are on an intercept course. Okay, now I'm really confused. When the Suliban cell ships dropped out of warp and the Tholians engaged them in a firefight, all of that was taking place around Enterprise. There wasn't any action or dialogue that conveyed the idea that the fight between the Tholians and the Suliban was taking place several light years away, which would then necessitate the Tholians having to catch up to Enterprise once the battle was over. Gah. Why do I even care anymore?
Kitschen Confidential: I have this Chef Instructor who used to dance on Broadway until he tore something and decided to become a chef. He's such a freakin' trip, man -- he puts the "flambé" in "flamboyant." I call him Chef Chateau Lafitte. He's energetic, loud, and bounces more than Tigger on ephedra. He trained at La Varenne, cheffed (yes, it's a verb in my world) for some Dutch baroness and her Princess Von Hapsburg visitors, catered parties for Anwar Sadat's daughter in Beacon Hill, and ate Cheez-Its with Julia Child in Cambridge. I'm fidgeting over here because he so needs his own show on the Food Network, and I should be the head writer. Instead of Emeril BAM-ming everyone within hearing, you'd have Chef Chateau Lafitte's red face and gelled salt-and-pepper brush-cut shouting, "Stah that!" His Boston accent gets in the way of his "r"s, but it's what he screams when he wants us to remember something. It's become so infectious that Mathra's been saying it to his multivariable students -- Bah-ston accent and all. It's a helluva lot better than Jamie Oliver's Essex-boy "easy-peasy" crap.
The Tholians hail Enterprise and tells them to hand over the Magical Mystery Pod. To buy time, T'Pol says they're prepared to surrender it to them, but their Launch Bay doors sustained damage and can't be opened. The Tholians interrupt her with clicks and screeches, and May-MFK reports that two Tholian ships are approaching the saucer section. Interesting, I don't think I've ever heard anyone on ENT refer to it that way. I wonder if it can be detached. The ship shakes. Hoshi announces they've locked onto the two docking ports. T'Pol orders her to put the deadbolt and chain on, as well as call a security team.
Launch Bay. Quantum removes a glowing red striated rod from the warhead and puts it inside the MMP. The cut has Reed and Quantum starting all over again on the torpedo -- obviously experiencing another round of déjà poo. "How many times do you think we've done this?" Quantum asks. "At least twice, maybe more," Malcolm Powder thinks. "Let's hope we've got it down by now," Quantum comments, and without asking for directions from his armory officer, he expertly starts detaching wires. No! Not the red one! ARHHHHHH! Sorry.
A security team runs down to one of the airlocks and points their weapons at the door. A laser begins cutting around the handle. Ah, the renowned Tholian punctuality! I wonder if the Tholians need weapons to do that, or if they can just cut through metal with their Lee Press-Ons.
Bridge. Hoshi reports what the Tholians are up to, so T'Pol dashes to her con. To do what, exactly, is not really that clear.
Launch Bay. "Control Room!" Quantum tells Malcolm Powder as he removes a glowing red striated rod from the warhead and puts it inside the MMP. Again. Malcolm runs up to the Control Room and starts pushing buttons. Quantum slides the MMP's door shut. Shouldn't the Tholians have broken down the airlock door by now?
Engineering. Trip activates the MMP's emergency beacon and sits back.
Launch Bay. Quantum joins Malcolm in the Control Room and orders him to open the Launch Bay doors. From the exterior of the ship, we see the Launch Bay doors open and the MMP drop out. A Tholian ship tractor-beams the MMP. Quantum tells Malcolm Powder to detonate the MMP. "I'd recommend putting more distance between us and that ship," Malcolm suggests. "NOW!" Quantum shouts. Malcolm pushes something, but nothing happens. T'Pol reports that the Tholians have neutralized the warhead. Quantum and Malcolm run up to the Bridge. Okay, the Tholians should be through the airlock by now!
Engineering. All the devices belonging to the MMP phase out. Trip is confused.
Sick Bay. Corpus Chris T phases out. Phlox is confused.
Outer space. The MMP in the Tholian tractor beam phases out. The whole crew is confused. T'Pol clarifies, "It dematerialized and it's not aboard the Tholian ships." The Tholians take off. They must be less confused than our intrepid crew, because otherwise they would have stuck around for the Q&A hour in order to find out where the MMP got to. "Why didn't they fire on us?" Quantum wonders. T'Pol suggests that they might have only been interested in the vessel. Quantum paces a bit before he remembers to ask after the health of the Vulcans. T'Pol tells him their life support is stable and their warp drive is damaged. "Let's see if we can give them a hand," Quantum says, ordering a sh'pod prepped and Phlox to the Launch Bay.
Quantum logs that a Vulcan transport ship is on its way to tow the Valkyrie and that no Vulcans sustained any injuries. He also notes that the weather reports not a Suliban nor a Tholian in the sky.
Captain's Table. Trip whines that they didn't have enough time to investigate the MMP, and gripes, "It looks like they sent the whole kit and caboodle back to the thirty-first century." Mathra had Catfish Mardi Gras with the other multivariable calc instructors today. I have absolutely no idea what made me think of that. "There's no evidence to support that," T'Pees-On-Trip's-Parade comments. Trip doesn't think there's any evidence to contradict it either. Nope. Basically, they have nothing. They started out with nothing, they threw in some nods to TOS and TNG, and they ended up with nothing. "What I don't understand is how quickly everything disappeared. That beacon was online for less than a minute," Trip muses. "You're forgetting that time is irrelevant to these people," Quantum says. "'Irrelevant'?" Trip repeats with his mouth full. Wait a few episodes; maybe the Traveler and Wesley can explain it to you. "If that vessel was from the future, whoever sent it had plenty of time to locate the signal and then travel back to any point in time to retrieve it," Quantum explains. They seem to be drinking out of bud vases in this scene. Trip makes a lame attempt at a joke and chunters off to stroke his engines.
T'Pol and Quantum sit in uncomfortable silence for a few seconds before Quantum says he's going to contact the High Command and apologize for the trouble they caused. T'Pol reminds him the captain of the Valkyrie pointed out that a ship can be replaced. "I...also...need...tothankthemforhelping out," Quantum says, clearly straining under the pressure of being nice to the Vulcans. T'Pol thinks the Vulcans would appreciate the gesture. T'Pol starts to leave, but pauses to say, "The High Command has asked me to prepare a report on this incident, with your permission." Quantum gives it, and adds, "I wonder if they'll believe that humans and Vulcans will be swapping chromosomes some day?" At least he didn't actually say "swapping spit," but it amounts to the same thing. "They're more likely to believe in time travel," T'Pol tells him extremely pointedly. Shot down again! Anyone else think Quantum needs to attend a sexual harassment seminar?