Episode Report Card Couch Baron: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT There's Things That You Guess…
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 9 | Aired on 03.27.2008
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.This episode is what I've been waiting for. Some judge has leukemia, and he's suing another guy who was supposed to donate bone marrow to him and backed out of the deal at the last minute. Matt and Taylor represent him, despite the fact that he's got a scary reputation among lawyers and also hates Matt. Turns out that the donor is the judge's long-lost son, who's bitter at him for never having been a father to him. The judge rules against the judge, but Taylor convinces their client to reconnect with his son for unselfish purposes. As he promised last week, Eli checks into surgical options for his aneurysm, but only one doctor seems to him like any kind of candidate. Meanwhile, the real George Michael shows up and hires him to represent a girl who got expelled for playing "I Want Your Sex" at a school abstinence assembly -- and he came to Eli because a dream directed him to do so. Jordan invokes a firm rule that high-profile clients have to have a partner on the team and inserts himself into the case, and you wonder why he's so anxious to work with Eli -- but it's only because he's a drop-dead, fan-club-joining, throwing-underwear-at-the-stage George Michael fan, which HA HA HA! If Victor Garber doesn't get an Emmy nomination for this one, I just don't even know what. Eli and Nate meet with the doctor, who's optimistic about the surgical possibilities, but with the George Michael thing, Eli's now uncertain. Eli actually calls Jordan a "fanboy," which: awesome (and clearly true, given that he knows George's real name by heart), and also awesome, Matt and Taylor pull a vision-sequence Sonny and Cher, right down to the outfits, with "I Got You Babe." Beth resurfaces, as she and Eli run into each other at the hospital. He tells her a lot of stuff that's been going on with him, and she's sympathetic and offers herself as a confidante, should he need one. She comes to the office and has an awkward meeting with Taylor, sending her off for drinks with Matt. But the twist is that Beth is going out with Nate! Eli chews Nate out, not for the Beth thing but for pulling away from him when he needs him the most. Taylor and Matt get drunk and sleep together, and I'm sorry if this is wrong, but I like them together, although Taylor ends up telling Matt to go to hell. George takes the stand in defense of the girl and manages to skewer this country's sexual hypocrisy in under two minutes. Is there anything he can't do? Apparently not, as he ends up playing a school benefit to raise money for a real sex-ed program at Molly's school. Jordan practically glows when he tells Eli that he sees why he's been taking the kind of cases he has, and I think détente has been achieved, not just with Jordan but with Nate, who shows up for a nice scene wherein he and Eli sort of decide to go ahead with the surgery. Or maybe not, as George tells Eli to keep going, no matter what, before getting up and playing "Fastlove." Did I mention how awesome this episode was? Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Eli's in an examining room griping to his brother about the gown he's wearing, as it apparently doesn't close in the back. Nate: "I overheard one of the nurses saying she thought your butt was cute." It must be tough to run this outfit with only one sighted nurse. Nate drops the humor and tells Eli not to be nervous, and Eli jokes, "What's there to be nervous about?" We then get a quick hit parade of doctors answering that question with "blindness," "coma," and "long-term memory loss." Eli's apparently scouting doctors at Well, You Did Ask Memorial. Another doctor says he can remove the aneurysm, no problem. "Just out of curiosity, how attached are you to your ability to speak?" Considering that Eli gapes wordlessly in response, it seems the doc's clever question kind of backfired.
Later, a re-dressed Eli walks out of the neurology ward with Nate, saying that apparently, everyone thinks the surgery would render Eli a vegetable. However, he badgers Nate into admitting that there might be one more possibility, but the man normally only takes cases originating at his own hospital. Eli charges Nate with convincing this doctor, and Nate agrees to make the call.
One his way out, Eli does a double-take when he realizes that Beth has just walked by. He calls to her, and she greets him warmly, although when he asks her what she's doing there, she stalls for a moment and says she didn't expect to see him before coming up with a story about Ben. To be fair, though, I didn't get that she was covering here, well-enough did she come up with something believable on the fly, so points for that. Beth then asks how Eli is, saying she saw him on the news, and she was going to call him but then figured he had enough on his plate. Eli tells her he's been better, and ticks off all the things that have gone wrong in his life lately. Beth, needless to say, is sympathetic to the point of being overwhelmed, and tells him that if he ever needs to talk, he's still got her number. He looks pleased at that prospect, and says he might just call her. Just a tip, Beth -- don't let your boyfriend answer your phone for you. Eli's already got the brain problem -- no need to give him a coronary.
Eli rushes up to "Patti," who's looking for something under "her" desk, and starts babbling something, but it's a bald, thirtysomething, bespectacled guy in her chair. He's also rather gay, so at least in the world of television stereotypes, he's got a chance to match her sassiness. ["Dude. 'Fierceness.' Did you not get the newsletter?" -- Joe R] Anyway, he's a temp named Bradley, who reads Eli a note Patti left for him, saying she's spending the week looking out for her friends and relatives in Silver Terrace, who thanks to him have no homes. It'd be pretty funny if that earthquake hit right about now.