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It's the one-year anniversary of Holmes's sobriety, and he's being a baby about getting his chip. Both Watson and Alfredo encourage him to accept it, but it turns out it's really only been 364 days, because he relapsed on his first day in rehab. And he feels terrible about it.
This week's case involves blackmail. A few years ago, someone slipped roofies to teenage girls and raped them. And after he went to jail, the families found out it had been recorded on video, with a warning that if anyone goes to the police, there's an accomplice that will release the tapes. Holmes quickly establishes who the blackmailer is, and he slips inside his house. And then he sees the blackmailer get killed, so now he's on the track of a murderer. And he has to find him before the accomplice releases everything!
The first step, of course, is the rapist. But he appears to be just another victim of the blackmailer, who stumbled upon the videos in a foreclosed storage unit. So that goes nowhere. By studying the blackmailer's files, Holmes determines that the accomplice is codenamed "Henry 8," but he doesn't know what that means. Alfredo stakes out the blackmailer's house, and that leads them to a sketchy lawyer in cowboy boots. The lawyer admits that he occasionally funnelled information to the blackmailer and gives up all of his files.
After more study, Holmes links the blackmailer to a man who makes a living by suing people for not being adequately prepared for enormously fat patrons. But he's hidden behind a pseudonym, which allows some screentime to be spent on meeting the man who killed the blackmailer. He's another father of a girl who got raped. With that out of the way, Holmes locates the fat accomplice. He's dead already!
The solution is that the blackmailer was killed by someone who had savagely beaten him a few months earlier. Then he cut his assailant into the action, so he had to kill his old partner. Then his new partner killed him. It all makes sense now!
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Watson comes downstairs to discover Holmes tattooing himself. He claims he's just doing a quick touch-up, and that he did a lot of his own tattoos. He was able to do both arms because he's ambidextrous. He does not explain how he tattooed his own back, but I assume he had an elaborate system of levers and pulleys. Watson declines the opportunity to get her own tattoo and says Holmes is getting his one-year sobriety chip tomorrow. Holmes says he's not going to accept it, because it's an arbitrary measure. And she's not a sober companion anymore, so Holmes thinks she should shut up about harassing him. He's got Alfredo for that now.
Holmes answers the phone and it's Alfredo. He's not calling about the one-year chip, because we need to have a crime to solve at some point. So Alfredo's got a friend who could use Holmes's help.
It's raining when Holmes and Watson arrive at the home of Ken Whitman, Alfredo's friend. They're let in by his daughter Eva, whose cello is in the other room. The cello isn't all that important, but it comes up a couple of times.
Ken, it transpires, is Alfredo's sponsor. He explains that two years earlier, a man named Brent Garvey slipped something into Eva's drink and raped her. He was arrested and she identified him in a line-up. Two other victims came forward and he went to jail. Eva was deeply affected by the experience, as you can imagine. She stopped playing the cello and starting hurting herself. But she's been doing better and might even be ready for college year. And a few months ago, Ken got a DVD in the mail of Garvey and Eva. That's gross. And there was a note, demanding ten thousand dollars or the video would be posted online and sent to the media. And there was a dire warning that if the police got involved or anything happened to the blackmailer, there was a secret accomplice that would post it. Ken paid the ten thousand without telling his wife. And a few weeks later, there was another demand for money, and again he paid. This seems like a story that isn't going to have a good ending. So a couple of days ago, he got a third demand and broke down. He almost relapsed and had to call someone. His own sponsor was out of town, so he called Alfredo. And Alfredo mentioned that he knew this guy with great deductive powers.
Holmes says he finds blackmailers odious. He promises to track down the blackmailer and the associate, then to destroy every trace of the recording.
The scene has Holmes and Watson in a car. Holmes says the bank account numbers led to this man they're watching leave his house: Charles Augustus Milverton. Watson thinks it was surprisingly easy to find him, but Holmes thinks he was just overconfident. Milverton turns the corner, and Holmes breaks into his house.
Inside the house: a kitty! Watson is still in the car, but she's communicating with Holmes via radio. This gives Holmes the chance to snark, "Another reason to despise Milverton. He keeps cats." He also has a laptop, which Holmes opens. Shoulda covered the webcam, chief. That's just common sense. The laptop has the video of Eva, and also of Brent Garvey's other two victims: Tracy Bender and Karen Pistone. And there are a lot of other videos, too, so Milverton appears to be a professional blackmailer. Watson alerts Holmes that Milverton has come back around the corner. Someone's coming in the back door at the same time, so Holmes ducks into the bathroom. There's the sound of a zipper, a beer opening, and a kitty meowing. Milverton sits down in the sliver of the room that Holmes can see, and he opens his laptop. Then Milverton says, "Please," and he gets shot. Holmes looks surprised. We see a figure in a ski mask and hood pick up Milverton. And the laptop. Holmes didn't even have time to gloat about how quickly he located the blackmailer!
Holmes bursts into Gregson's office. He gives him the Eva/Garvey DVD and waits for him in the conference room. Once Gregson is done, he would like to know why Holmes wanted him to watch the brutal rape of a teenage girl. That's a fair question, and Holmes explains that he wanted Gregson to understand what's at stake. He recaps what's gone on so far, with special emphasis on Milverton's unknown accomplice, who is supposed to go public with everything if anything happens to him. So, Holmes says, "It's possible that I am here to report a murder." Hypothetically, he saw the blackmailer murdered. But that would have unpleasant results. Gregson reminds him that he has to report murders. Holmes remind him that the accomplice would release the video to the world. If he learns of his death. He wants to identify the accomplice first and prevent him from doing it. Gregson asks, "What if the killer is the accomplice?" Holmes looks determined and answers, "Then all roads lead to Mecca. Blackmailer is foiled and the killer is caught. All in one fell swoop. You have daughters, do you not, captain?" Gregson looks down at the table.
Brownstone. Watson has been listening to the police scanner and there has been nothing about Milverton. Alfredo is watching Milverton's place, in case someone comes looking for him. Holmes took things from Milverton's desk, but the only interesting thing is a ledger. Watson asks how Holmes is doing. Not great, apparently. But he has a rough height and weight on the murderer. He doesn't even know what the murderer smelled like, thanks to the cat urine and kitty litter. He thinks the murderer was most likely a blackmail victim, but he's willing to consider that it might have been the accomplice. Their step is to visit Garvey in prison.
Prison hospital. Garvey's face is messed up and his leg is in traction. Holmes does the introductions: "I'm Holmes. This is Watson." I'm not sure why that entertains me so much. Maybe it's because it sounds like it's straight out of Dragnet. Garvey thinks they're here about the guys who beat him up. They are not! Holmes knows that Milverton visited him seven months earlier and Garvey says he's a friend of his father. He denies knowing anything about any sex tapes. Holmes is very stern as he says, "I've seen the tapes, Garvey. I have one in my possession. I'm very seriously considering telling your friends here about them before I leave today. Maybe they won't wait to find you in the yard time. Maybe they'll pay you a visit in your sickbed." He looks scared. Watson asks if he has access to other blackmail materials. Garvey denies it. His claim is that Milverton threatened him with what he called "the failsafe," too. He had his stuff in a storage unit but couldn't pay for it. Man, that sounds stressful -- to have secret recordings of your rape career in a storage unit you can't keep. Milverton got a lot of dirt from storage units, apparently. Holmes speculates that Garvey has a parole hearing coming up. Garvey says he can't help them. He's just another victim.
Back to the brownstone. Holmes studies papers and tells Watson that Garvey appears to be an honest rapist. Garvey begged his parents for loans, and the money correlates with money that came in to Milverton's ledger. So Garvey was Milverton's victim. He hasn't made a decision on telling the parole board about the videos, because it should be the parents' call. Upon further investigation, the ledger has something interesting: outgoing expenditures to "Henry 8" that are ten percent of what comes in. In demonstrating this, there's a shot of the ledger that lets us see that the ledger also has people named things like Abram, Xenon, Duke of York, Linus, Citizen 4 and Aenus. Heh. "Aenus." The point is that "Henry 8" is almost certainly the secret accomplice. Alfredo calls to report that someone's at Milverton's door.
Holmes and Watson arrive at Milverton's, but the guy has obviously left. Alfredo says he hopped in a cab. Here's what he remembers: "Tall. Six feet, maybe. Fat. Grey hair, mustache. Suit and cowboy boots." And there was something familiar about him, but Alfredo doesn't know if it was from seeing him in a meeting or maybe he stole his car or something. Holmes decides that Alfredo saw the guy's face, so naturally the thing to do is use regression therapy or hypnosis or something. Normally he'd use a sensory deprivation chamber, but he's willing to have Alfredo climb into the trunk of his car instead. Watson, however, has a video on her phone: an old TV commercial starring "Duke Landers, Esq." The catchphrase is, "Come on down and see Sheriff Duke." This is the guy! She recognizes the signifiers of mustache, suit, and cowboy boots.
Holmes and Watson go to interrogate Landers at his office. He denies knowing Milverton. Holmes admits that they can't prove that he was there, nor that he was a client. Landers says the law prevents him from discussing clients, not that he's admitting Milverton was a client. Holmes suggests the "Esq." at the end of "Duke Landers" must mean he has a law degree, not that he's the eldest son of a knight. Then he takes Landers's degree off the wall and smashes the frame. There are two signatures, but they have the same hand. And the degree isn't on the right paper. Landers buckles. He says he got Milverton off on a DWI charge and then he was asked to funnel information. But that's all he did! He knows Milverton had a failsafe, but that's all. Holmes demands everything he has on Milverton.
Later, Watson says there's no useful information coming from the stuff Landers gave them. And then she notices that Holmes is playing with a bunch of sobriety chips he ordered online. That seems like cheating. Watson wants to talk about his one-year chip, since he clearly did this to get at her. Holmes looks uncomfortable and redirects the conversation to Milverton. He's discovered that two years ago, Milverton directed someone named Abraham Zelner to Landers so he could sue a company for not properly accommodating his morbid obesity. And if Zelner was morbidly obese that could make "Henry 8" a logical code name. Gregson calls to tell them that the police have arrested someone who was found trying to dump a corpse into some wet cement. The perp is Anthony Pistone and he was being blackmailed. He daughter was one of those other victims of Brent Garvey. And Pistone's attorney is talking to the media already. So the news is out.
Interrogation chamber. Pistone says he got the first note nine months ago with a DVD. His lawyer cautions him to stay on topic when he talks about how he wanted to get his hands on Milverton. He paid the first time and a few weeks later, he got another demand. And when the new demand came last week, he said he had the money but it was in cash. He claimed to have borrowed it from a friend who ran numbers, so he can't bring it to a bank. So what good is it going to be to Milverton? It worked, though; Pistone left the money in an envelope under a park bench and followed Milverton home when he picked it up. It does not seem like it was all that hard to find Milverton. He says he smashed the laptop and tossed it in a dumpster. Gregson says there was postmortem damage to Milverton's face. Pistone explains that when he looked at Milverton's dead face, it was like he was laughing at him. So he started stomping him.
Gregson checks with Holmes, who verifies that Pistone could be the killer. And he thinks Pistone acted rashly. I agree! That laptop could have been useful. Gregson thinks Pistone will be out in three and a half years. Bell stops Holmes on his way out. Abraham Zelner's alleged address was a butcher shop in Chinatown, and there's no record of an Abraham Zelner anywhere, so the name's a fake. Holmes gets a call from Watson, and he guesses that the Brownstone's on fire, since that's how his day is going. Nope: Ken Whitman just got a new blackmail demand from Charles Milverton. The email is pretty terse. We also see the rest of Milverton's inbox. It's all spam. My favorite subject line is "Steps. Already a thing of the past?"
Alfredo is at the brownstone, showing the email to Holmes and Watson. Holmes thinks the new blackmail letter is from Henry 8, who should have all of Milverton's information. He's not going public because he'd rather make money. Yeah, I can't imagine what's in it for the accomplice to just release all this stuff and hope that it goes viral or something. The police would certainly catch you right away. Holmes says, "I can't recall the last time I was so thankful for the essential avarice of the human condition." He's going to dig into Landers's files again. But first, tea. He thanks Alfredo for his help in a way that dismisses him. But Alfredo won't leave: "We're going to a meeting. You're getting your chip." Holmes tries to weasel out, but Alfredo says it'll only take a few minutes. Holmes says he can't accept the chip. He realizes that for most addicts, it's a tangible symbol of success, but for him, it's a reminder that he failed one year ago. Alfredo starts to leave, but he stops so he can deliver an awesome speech: "I'm sorry if that's how you see it. You know what I wish you got? Milestones like this one. They're yours, but they're not about you. They're about all the people who haven't got there yet. They see you do it and they think, why can't I? You know, I know it's hard, but one of these days, you gotta get over yourself." Alfredo is a great character. He's absolutely not taking any of Holmes's crap, because none of Holmes's many talents get him out of the basic facts that he's an addict and Alfredo knows how to help him.
Watson wakes up, and Holmes is in her room. He does that a lot, and I think it's creepy. I guess Watson might get used to it. Holmes says that Zelner accepted the first lowball settlement offer in that lawsuit, which suggests that he wanted to get his money before his fake name was discovered. And what if he'd made a practice of suing places for discrimination against the obese? So Holmes looked into a list of similar lawsuits and hands Watson the names of the people involved. The one after Abraham Zelner is Brad Yates, then Cory Xavier. The first letter of the first name goes up by one while the first letter of the last name goes down. The bottom name is Kyle Platt, suggesting an L.O. and an M.N. still to come. I got that faster than Watson did, but to be fair, she just woke up. Anyway, this got Holmes to some pictures of the plaintiff. He's pretty fat, all right. And that picture matches Stewart Bloom, who made a similar lawsuit but whose name doesn't match the pattern. So that could be this person's real name! And he lives in Staten Island.
Holmes and Watson enter a darkened room. Holmes calls out, "Mr. Bloom?" There's no answer. Holmes squats down and squints at the floor. It's covered in kitty litter. And he doesn't think it was put down for cats. It's here to absorb strong odors. Like, say, an extremely fat man decomposing in a bathtub.
Once Gregson arrives, Holmes tells Him that Stewart Bloom was Milverton's failsafe accomplice. He's been dead about a week and there's a boot print on his chest. Holmes feels that Milverton did this, and Gregson asks why it couldn't be Pistone. Watson explains that the boot size doesn't fit. And it's Milverton's brand of kitty litter (according to Holmes's offended nose), which he bought a lot of a few weeks ago. So, question one: why would Milverton kill Bloom? And question two: Who's the new blackmailer?
Brownstone. Holmes looks at a blank wall, which would ordinarily be covered with clippings. He tells Watson that he put the stuff up, then took it down again. He needs new data. Then he admits that he was trying to get a rise out of her earlier by ordering the sobriety chips. She puts down the boxes of evidence and sits down and listens. Holmes repeats the thing he told Alfredo, then admits that the real reason he can't accept his one-year chip is because it's not really his one-year anniversary. He relapsed the day after he agreed to enter rehab. He destroyed his drugs and paraphernalia. Then he entered Hemdale. The day after that, he got very sick (there's room here for a clever reference to Jonny Lee Miller being "Sick Boy," but I don't have the energy for it), so he devised a way to sneak out, get what he needed, and return. He concludes, "And that was the last time I took drugs. Not the day before." Watson thinks one day isn't that important. It's still basically a year, right? And I'm not sure exactly when this episode is set, but 2012 was a leap year so it could still have been 365 days. Holmes is overwhelmed by frustration and has a lot of trouble getting words out. He's angry with himself that he decided not to use drugs and buckled in 24 hours. And if it's not a year, it's not a year: "I'm a man of details. It matters to me." And it's proving difficult to tell Alfredo, partly because he felt the need to tell Watson first.
Holmes's computer bleeps. He says, "Ah." It's Charles Milverton's autopsy report, which Holmes isn't that interested in. He figures that he saw it actually happen, so the autopsy is unlikely to have new information. Watson glances at the report and says, "Hmm." Holmes stops dead. The impression she got from Pistone and Gregson was that Milverton's whole face was smashed in. But the stomping damage was on only one side. Holmes observes that they seemed to be specifically targeting some scars on Milverton's head that he remembers seeing.
Police station. Holmes bursts in to talk to Mr. Pistone, who has made bail. Gregson says Milverton was savagely beaten four months ago. He gave varying descriptions of his attacker and they think he wanted to keep it a secret. The pictures from back then include scars that match Pistone's ring. And the rape victim was Pistone's stepdaughter who he doesn't like, rather than his biological daughter. Holmes says his conclusion is that Milverton offered Pistone a piece of his operation. He continues: "Charles now had two partners. His failsafe Stewart Bloom and you." So he needed to kill Bloom. The lawyer brings up the question of whether they have any proof. Well, they searched Pistone's home and office, and they found Milverton's laptop. It wasn't smashed, after all! And it was in Pistone's brother's desk. The brother has already confessed to being the new failsafe and he's the one who sent the new demand. Holmes says smugly, "So it looks like you'll be spending a few more decades in prison than you thought."
Alfredo sets up folding chairs in what is clearly the kind of hall where you get recovery meetings. If this is a set, it's a perfect one. Holmes walks in and says, "There's something I'd like to discuss with you." That's all we see, which I think is a fun way to do the scene. Holmes looks uncomfortable, but he's going to get through it.
Brownstone. Holmes tattoos his right arm. He tells Watson that his talk with Alfredo was liberating, but he might be being sarcastic. It's hard to tell. Watson says it's 12:07 AM., so she wishes him a happy real anniversary. Holmes claims he doesn't care, and Watson gives him a present. She says, "It's dark. It's not just for anyone, but I thought it was very you." Holmes looks haunted. Watson leaves, and he opens the box. It's a picture frame. Eventually, we get to see what's inside: it's the last stanza of Robert Frost's "Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening." You know, "miles to go before I sleep."
Follow Monty on Twitter at @monty_ashley and read his blog, Mysterious Exhortations.
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