This is the Deb episode to end all Deb episodes. Dexter has to find a nanny, and Deb takes charge. She grills prospective caretakers as if they were murder suspects. They finally end up with Sonya, a Brit who seems, according to Dex, "practically perfect." I'm sure she's a human trafficker or dog fighter or something, but, right now, she does seem really nice.
Dex goes to counseling, for Harrison's benefit, and the doctor tells him that he's too young to be able to remember Rita's murder. She tells him to do something for himself. So, he befriends Boyd Fowler, the animal collector/lady killer. He calls himself Darrel Tucker. He decides to use an old tourist welcome center as the site to kill Boyd. Harry tries to criticize him about killing him in the daytime. He tells him that the kill won't "bring Rita back," which brings this episode down a whole letter grade. He calls in a dead animal near the center, before he goes on a ride with Boyd. Shawn Hatosy is a killer, but he's stacked and sexy. They meet at the location and, when Dexter injects him with a syringe of knock-out stuff, he shoots Dex with a tranquilizer gun. They both end up in the hospital, where they both lie that they got knocked out by accident. So, Dexter follows Boyd to his house and finishes the job. HOWEVER, someone was watching. Who? A lady in danger, who Boyd was going to kill, in the form of one Julia Stiles.
Quinn is coming on really strong with Deb, and she is not having it in really amazing, Emmy-winning ways. He calls the FBI agent who questioned Dex and begs him to tell him where Arthur Mitchell's family is.
Deb has to work with Sgt. Lopez, the lady cop with whom she seems to have a problem, in order to canvass the neighborhood where that trinket-surrounded lady's head was found. She initially seems to have a problem with her. Then, they get info from a dude who ends up getting his head cut off.
Laguerta finds out that Batista's bar fight was about her making more money than most men in the department and how good her blow jobs are. Seriously, I think that last part is an actual element of the conflict. The guy that Batista beats up ends up having internal bleeding and presses charges against him.
Previously: You know, Rita is dead and the FBI wants to find Kyle Butler, in case maybe he knows about why Arthur Mitchell targeted her. Deb is crashing at Quinn's place because Dexter and the kids are at her apartment and it's too cramped. That said, Astor was still pissed at Dex and she and Cody (though he wanted to stay with Dexter) went to live with their grandparents. Batista got into a bar brawl with another police officer because the guy called Laguerta a fine piece of ass. Dexter finds out that Boyd Fowler is killing women. He's going to kill him to cheer himself up.
So here we are only three episodes into the season and I think we may already have our Jennifer Carpenter Emmy moment. Make that moments. I plan on making my case in this recap, though J. Car did the heavy lifting. We begin with a tight shot of her face. She tells a woman that this is going to last as long as it takes to get to the truth. I love it when she's bad cop. The woman, a mousy blonde, replies that she's not lying. But, Deb counters, earlier she'd said she didn't do drugs and now she's saying that she did. The woman is confused. She says that she said she "might" have tried something at a Tri-Delt party. Deb has a problem with the "might" part. She did or she didn't, what's the answer. The woman says that Deb sounds like a cop and she barks that she is. The camera pulls back to show us her living room. There's Dexter holding Harry. They're interviewing nannies. Dexter VOs that Deb has insisted on taking the lead with the interviews and, at this rate, only Mary Poppins would meet the qualifications. Except for that whole using sugar to wash medicine down thing. What, is she trying to rot their teeth out or something?
, we're treated to the bad nanny montage, as dear to my heart as the trusty bad date montage. Here's a large lady who says that she thinks kids should eat a lot of cheese. Here's a hillbilly whose method of saving a choking child involves something called a "knuckle slap." Here's a hipster dude who says that he hasn't had martial arts training but he can scream real loud. I find the disarmingly casual nature of that comment oddly masculine, but Deb's not having it.
Now, we appear to have a winner before she even opens her mouth. She's a lady of a certain age, British, and possessed of a nursing degree. Deb wants to know why she isn't working at a hospital -- budget cuts cost her her position. She says that she doesn't need a big salary. Nanny lady? Don't ever tell that to someone again. She looks over at Dexter and mentions that Harrison is tired. Then, she asks if she can hold him. Though tired, Harrison manages to smile real big once she's holding him, kind of like there's a PA just offscreen holding an Elmo doll and making faces. Dex VO's that this Sonya person is practically perfect. She offers her condolences for Dexter's loss and leaves, saying goodbye to "Prince Harry." Deb seems skeptical, but Dexter says that she's the one. It's decided. Deb reminds Dex that he and Harry have an appointment with a counselor that day. Then, she says that she loves him. She waits and finally he offers, "Me too." She gives a little look of "Yes, that's what we say." Then, she leaves.
Dex looks around. He's feeling lonely, which isn't usually a problem for him. He looks at pictures of the women that Boyd killed. Why would you need/want pictures of that? And, on your computer? Doesn't sound like sustainable serial killing to me.
At the station, Deb walks in on everyone reviewing a surveillance tape showing the dude from the last episode who died of a shotgun wound to the head and whose wife was the lady they found all butchered. Apparently, he was entering his PIN incorrectly, which is odd considering the number was his wife's birthday. Deb notices that Batista and Masuka have a few nicks and bruises and asks what happened. Masuka says that they had to get ghetto on someone at the club, which, naturally, makes her laugh. Quinn points out that Masuka hurt himself running away from the fight, but he insists that it was a "tactical retreat." Laguerta gets everyone back to work. Quinn deduces that the guy killed his wife, tried to get cash out to skip the country, was too nervous to remember his PIN, then went home and killed himself. Deb points out that the guy didn't have a motive to kill his wife and Quinn says that maybe he was just sick of her. Deb says that, oh yeah, he was just sick of her so he cut off her head and displayed it in a park with candles and shit all around it. Jennifer Carpenter delivers lines like that with a mix of frustration (both the kind indicative of a professional working with someone of a lower caliber and a childish sort where it seems that she's trying to get the world to listen to her) and determination unlike anyone I can really recall right now. Quinn argues back that the guy was obviously crazy -- he looks it on the tape. Deb says that crazy doesn't explain why there was not a drop of blood on his body. How, she wonders, does one cut off someone's head and not get a drop of blood on themselves? A bib? She puts her hand under her chin in this really amazing way as she's asking him this question. Love it. Emmy. Give it.
Batista stops the two of them from continuing to argue. Deb says that she wants to re-canvas the neighborhood where the head (Mrs. Alvaro's) was found. Laguerta agrees. Deb requests Batista's presence, because the neighborhood is Hispanic. When the meeting adjourns, Laguerta asks Batista how big a deal the fight he got into was -- considering Masuka was there too. He says that it's nothing. She reminds him that it was another cop that he had the fight with, but Batista calms her. They hashed it out and everything is fine now.
Dexter and Harrison are talking to a counselor. He says that he hasn't noticed any changes in the baby's eating and sleeping habits. She points out that Harrison's cognitive skills are just developing, therefore, there's no chance that he could have any memory of Rita's murder. This is huge news for Dexter. Michael C. Hall is pretty tremendous right here. The idea that his son doesn't have to be damaged in the same way he is floors him. He explains that he saw something traumatic when he was three, but the doctor reminds him that Harrison is only 10 months old. She thinks he's going to be fine. Suddenly, Harrison pops the head off of the doll he's playing with. Uh-oh. He starts to cry, so Dexter replaces it for him. The doctor says that, sometimes, babies Harrison's age can exhibit behavior that's alarming, but they're just releasing energy and it's completely normal. She says that the most important thing that Dexter can do right now is be good to himself and "do something for Dexter." "Dexter will," he replies.
Deb and Quinn are getting stonewalled by the residents of the neighborhood where Mrs. Alvaro was found. As they walk away from another silent person, Quinn tells Deb that he's frustrated that they haven't had sex again. He knows that it's been 9 days and 13 hours. Really? He made that shit up. And his physical gesture for sex? A fist punching the air near his face. Quinn has really classed it up this season. It's been a real privilege to witness. Deb confirms that, yes, he has been counting the hours. He explains that he has an internal clock, which she suggests he unplug. Then, he says that they might as well be married at this point. That's a leap. Deb's reply? "Shit on my face, don't EVER use the words 'we' or 'married' in the same FUCKING sentence again." Do you think she opens her scripts for each episode like a kid on Christmas morning wondering where the pony of a line like that's going to be?
Batista shows up and says that he's not having any luck with the residents either. He points out that they are in a Venezuelan neighborhood and he's Cuban, so he really doesn't have any pull. He mentions that Sgt. Lopez, who we remember Deb not really liking, is from this neighborhood. Deb reminds them that Lopez thinks that the killings are some religious cult thing. Then, she screws up the pronunciation of Santa Muerte and says poop instead. Batista and Quinn love this. Big laughs. She tells Quinn to shut it. So, this Santa Muerte thing looks like it's going to be the big mystery of the season, yes?
Dexter tracks Boyd down at an outside cafe and positions himself so that they run into each other. He joins Dex and Dexter reveals that he's out of work and is named Darryl Tucker. Boyd offers to let Dexter ride with him for the day, to see if he'd enjoy picking up dead animals.
They plan to ride together the day, so Dexter goes to an abandoned tourist welcome center and sets it up for a kill. While there, he sees Harry, who questions Dexter's plan to kill in the daytime. He says that killing Boyd won't bring Rita back. Stupid ghost. What a stupid thing to say. Dexter proceeds and it looks like everything is OK. Oh, that's why he has those pictures, so he can show Boyd as he's about to kill him.
Deb and Lopez go to some dude to see if he knows anything about the killing. Lopez says that, if anyone knows anything, it'll be this guy. They go into this little store that sells religious stuff and, while they're waiting for the guy to come out, Lopez says that Deb made a smart decision bringing her on the case. They are led into a back room and meet some guy who looks very nervous. They ask if he remembers selling this tiny statue that was found at the crime scene. He nervously denies even believing in the religion, but Deb points out that he has a religious tattoo. He says, in English, that he got drunk one night and woke up with it. He goes back to speaking Spanish to Lopez and Deb barks at him that they were doing just fine in English. He barks back that she lives in Miami and why doesn't she learn Spanish. She replies, "Cause me too busy, making a living." He says that he doesn't have anything more to tell them and Deb stomps out. Once they're in the car, Lopez tells Deb that she knows she's feeling a lot of pressure, but she should take a breath. And, she does! Girl's willing to learn. I like that. Deb says that Lopez will return the day by herself to see if the guy will talk.
Dexter gets home and notices that Sonya isn't there. He immediately freaks out. She returns moments later with sleeping Harrison. She'd had trouble getting him to sleep and thought some fresh air might help. It did. He reminds her that she didn't answer her cell phone and she reminds him that her hands were full. She notices that Dexter is worked up and points to a note that she'd left him on the fridge. Dex sighs. He VOs that he's not used to looking for notes on the fridge, except from other serial killers. He tells Sonya that he and Harrison are lucky to have her.
Laguerta and Batista are about to make out in the elevator at work when Masuka gets in. He tells Laguerta that Batista was her knight in shining armor the night before and she should be "polishing his lance." So, now she knows the fight was about her. Once off the lift (I love to say "lift"), she demands that he tell her exactly what happened during his fight. He tells her that it's settled, but she gets all boss lady on him. Laguerta says that the dude's insinuations that she was a slut were wrong.
Late that night, Dex and Deb have a talk. She wonders why Sonya left Ireland and whether or not maybe she's running from something. Dex facetiously suggests that she check Interpol and she has the most brilliant sullen teenage little sister fuck-off face. She tells him that the case with Lopez is driving her crazy. Dex tells her that he spoke with Cody that day. He had called to get Dex's pancake recipe. He says that he sounded happier. He also says that Astor wouldn't come to the phone. Deb tells him that she'll come around. She tells him that routine is a good way to achieve normalcy after losing someone. He asks her where she got that and she snaps that she is capable of independent thought, before smiling and saying she heard it on Oprah. She tells Dex to keep getting better.
The day, before getting in the car with Boyd, Dexter phones in a dead animal. He says that Boyd will get the call (I'm assuming later?). He gets into his truck and they're off. Boyd is listening to his self-help guy that we heard when Dexter was looking through his house. He tells Dex that it changed his life and can help Dex through his divorce (he notes the tan line on Dex's ring finger). He VOs that he didn't want to talk about that part of his life. Boyd notices that it's a touchy subject for him and recommends that he listen to Jordan Chase, the guy on the recording. His catchphrase is "Take It Now!" And, um, I think that's Jonny Lee Miller on the cover of that CD. Hell yeah. Boyd asks "Darryl" what he wants and says we're on Earth to find out what we want.
Quinn is trying to piece together a composite of three different witnesses who'd seen Kyle Butler. Conveniently, he has a picture of Dexter on his desk too. Lopez tells Deb that she got some info from the guy they visited yesterday. He didn't have names, but he had descriptions of two guys -- thugs in their 30's. They're going to see if they can get more out of him. Something tells me that guy's going to get beheaded.
Dexter and Boyd are scooping a splattered animal off of the road. Dexter called two hours earlier but Boyd hasn't gotten it yet. Dex thinks that the kill is off for today. Then, the call comes! And, yeppers, that dude is dead. His head is set up on an altar.
Dexter and Boyd make it to the area that Dex had chosen. He gives an injection to Boyd who freaking shoots him with a tranquilizer gun. Dex wakes up in an ambulance. Boyd is to him. They keep giving each other creepy eyes. At the ER, Boyd takes off the minute the docs aren't looking. He goes looking for Dexter with some hardcore shears. He doesn't find him, so he just leaves the hospital.
Masuka joins Deb and Lopez at the crime scene. Lopez feels that this is her fault, because he was seen talking to her. Deb said that was her call and Lopez did a good job. Masuka studies the damage to the dude's head and wonders why no one just shoots each other anymore. Quinn gets a call from Agent Walker. Quinn thanks him for returning his call and says that he thinks he has a lead on Kyle Butler. He wants Walker to arrange for a meeting with Arthur Mitchell's family. They are about to go into witness protection, but Quinn begs him to get the interview.
Boyd, after arriving home, hears a noise in his house. He draws a gun and expects to find Dexter. As he's looking around, the Take It CD starts playing. As he's entranced once again by the soothing message of the former Mr. Jolie, Dexter injects Boyd again, this time without incident. He VO's that this whole thing could have gone smoother. You think? Dex calls Sonya and tells her that he's going to be a little late. She tells him that Harrison took his first step today. She sent him a picture. He hangs up and looks at the pic.
Laguerta, on her way to the new crime scene, is visited by someone from Internal Affairs. He tells her that Batista is going to be the subject of an investigation because of the fight. The guy he got in the fight with is in the hospital with internal bleeding and is pressing charges. Apparently, two witnesses saw Batista kick the guy on the ground, which is assault with a deadly weapon. He could be seeing jail time.
Boyd wakes up duct taped to a table. There is newspaper all over the walls. He regrets not being able to show Boyd the pictures of the women he'd killed. Boyd cries that they were all suffering and he put them out of their misery. Dexter, in that dreamy way he gets right before he jabs a knife into their chest, explains that his wife was murdered by someone like Boyd... and himself. He says that Boyd will be the beginning of his healing process. Now's the part where Boyd tries another tactic, since crying didn't work. He says that he knew Dex was fucked up when he saw him for the first time. He also says that Dexter doesn't know what he's getting into. Dex says he wants his wife back, but killing Boyd will have to do. So he does. He VOs that he actually feels emptier. Then, he hears a noise. There's a shadow behind the door. He finds a dirty, half-naked woman crouching in a corner. He tells her that she's safe, but she's clearly not in a place to be reasoned with. She tries to run away (is that blood on her back?) but Dexter holds her back and she faints. It's Julia Stiles! Dexter says that she saw everything. She saw HIM. You know, for someone all alone in the world and all that, Dexter sure does have a shit ton of epiphanies about intimacy. He's freaking Deepak Chopra up in here.
Jeff Long is a writer/performer living in Brooklyn. He can be reached at jeff.long75@gmail.com
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