By Kim
It still remains sad to me that they need to show the explanation for this show before every episode. Maybe they could have made the show less complicated so that you could understand the premise by just watching the show. Or maybe they think the audience is really dumb. I don't know.
We open on various Jam Pony denizens lifting a water heater from an abandoned building. Sketchy is babbling about starting a grunge revival, which I am all for, personally. I still have all my flannels. Herbal thinks it sucks that Sketchy is in it for the money and not the music. Have I mentioned that Sketchy looks like he's about thirty-five years old? Max mentions how excited she is to take a hot shower, since they are taking this hot-water heater. But wouldn't it be rusted out? I'm just saying. Sketchy and OC banter over his hitting on some hot chick. Max has this big grin on her face while she lifts the obviously very heavy hot-water tank, like, couldn't Jessica Alba at least pretend that it's not made out of foam? Sketchy sees a rat and drops his end of the tank. Max and Herbal are left holding the tank, and they decide to push it up on one end on the count of three. Of course, Max's super strength comes into play, and the hot-water heater goes crashing into the wall. At which point, in the real world, there would be holes in it because of all the rust. Also, hot-water tanks? Not that heavy that they would require four people. I know this -- we just got a new one in our basement a few months back, and it took two people to move it. Anyway, Max tries to pretend like it was Herbal's strength that caused the tank to go flying. Herbal accepts the compliment.
So the whole hot-water-tank thing was to create a situation where Jessica Alba could walk around in a robe, I guess, because that's what happens . OC is sitting on the couch, listening to Max bliss out over the shower. OC says, "Give me your paw." I really hate the language this show has invented to make it seem hip or something. Like, who says "paw" instead of "hand," in this century or any other? Anyway, OC wants to give Max a manicure, but Max thinks it sounds too much like Manticore. Ha ha. Not. OC thinks that Max is "so butch" that it's hard to believe she doesn't "play on the all-girl team." Because if a lesbian character spouts lesbian stereotypes, it's okay. Max says that she doesn't need pampering -- just a hot shower and clean underwear. But wouldn't a hot shower be considered pampering on this show? OC says men like women who mind the details, and Max insists that she's "no man's woman." OC hears a rat squeaking and notes that they have a rodent problem. This will be important later. Max asks if men really pay attention to manicures and stuff, and OC says that they do. Max laughs at OC being an expert on men, and OC says she likes men, but she doesn't want to go to bed with them. Because she's a lesbian. I don't know if you got that already. Just then, some plaster cracks, and the hot-water tank comes crashing through the ceiling, landing on their living-room floor. Why was it above their apartment in the first place? Don't hot water tanks usually go in the basement? Just wondering. Anyway, Max caps the scene by saying that "somebody out there just doesn't like [her]." Shout-out?