Last week, Jake went home and cried about it. Boo hoo! This week, in addition to their individual dances, the couples will participate in a team dance called the Cha Cha Challenge. I do like a group dance; it means more chances for someone to fall down. It always throws me off when Tom doesn't start the show by yelling LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE! I wonder why he does it sometimes and not other times?
The couples are introduced and walk down the stairs. It's Cheryl's birthday, did you know? Wow, Nicole looks really stoned. I think she and Pam were hanging out before the show, because her eyes are like slits and she's REALLY into the music. Maybe they split a Vicodin or something. Pamela looks radiant. I don't know if it's lighting or makeup or what, but her skin looks great.
The first couple tonight is Erin and Maks. Last week, Maks got in trouble for stripping naked, but this week, they have the quickstep. Maks vows to do it properly, and adds that he might "take his pants off at the end, but just a little bit." In rehearsal, Erin tries to tell Maks that it's dumb to take his pants off at the end of the routine, because it's going to come off as disrespectful and it doesn't fit into the routine. Maks gets bitchy about it and walks out, and Erin muses that he's being a brat, which he is. I mean, clearly, he's just doing it to tweak Len and keep up his reputation as the bad boy of ballroom, but dude. You're a ballroom dancer, not a small time hood. Leave the rebellion to bad '50s movies and just show us an awesome quickstep. So how does it turn out? Well, they do a whole thing at the beginning where Maks takes off his jacket and turns it inside out and they both rip off their bottom halves to reveal... a different colored bottom half. It's cute, but it takes a lot of time, and it clearly distracts Erin and takes her a few measures to actually get into the dance. Once she does, she does well, but she seems kind of in her head. The choreography is good, but it ends with them running up the stairs like there's another wasted four measures or whatever when they could have been dancing. It just could have had more content if there wasn't so much bullshit, is what I'm saying.
Len says that he thought the start was fine because it fit the song and adds that he dreads when Maks has to dance to "Great Balls of Fire." Len! He thinks it was Erin's best dance. Bruno thought it was "slick, lightning fast," and his only criticism was slightly tense shoulders. Carrie Ann thought it was gorgeous with good body contact, attention to detail, and lines. Hmm. Maybe I was just annoyed with Maks's brattiness and couldn't see how good the routine was. Scores: Carrie Ann 9, Len 9, and Bruno 9. Maks says he's happy.
Chad and Cheryl got high marks for their tango last week, as the judges felt that he was growing. This week, they have the waltz. Chad has trouble with the technique, so Tony comes in to help him out, and talks about football to get Chad to understand the body movements. I have to say that I've been sad that I don't feel like Chad's weird personality has come across on this show. If I didn't follow him on Twitter, I wouldn't like him at all based on what I've seen. He's a little funny but the wackiness is missing. So how's his waltz? His posture is way better, and his arms are okay, but he drops it a little near the end. He always has a moment in each routine where he stops dancing and just walks. He needs to work on that character thing that Pamela does so well. I would say that this is his best dance, though, technique-wise. It's not 10-worthy, but it's good.
Bruno can't believe how graceful Chad was, and reminds him to watch his hands. Carrie Ann likes how elegant his lines were, and she thought it was sexy how he tried to be tender and graceful. Len thought Chad's arms were full of fluidity, and then tells Chad to remember this date, because this is the night he became a contender. Chad looks delighted. Aw. So cute. Backstage, Brooke brings up all the birthday gifts that Chad bought for Cheryl, and he says that it's him showing his appreciation for how hard Cheryl works. Uh huh. Sure. Scores: Carrie Ann 8, Len 9, and Bruno 8. Cheryl can't believe they got a 9 from Len. Me neither!
Last week, everyone loved Nicole's samba, except for Len (and me) because he didn't think it was a proper routine. This week, Derek vows to do a proper routine for Len, and Nicole dedicates the routine to her aunt, who has Down Syndrome and they're dancing to her favorite song. Nicole struggles with the frame and how Derek wants her to learn the routine, and Derek realizes that he needs to tell her when she's doing well. The routine starts out and Nicole has this weirdly intense look on her face. The waltz seems like it should be smiley, but she looks smoldering if that makes sense. Like she's daring us to like her routine. The routine itself feels a little too herky jerky for me, but her lines are beautiful. I just think the waltz should be more flowing. Nicole looks upset before they even finish. I don't know. It was weird.
Carrie Ann starts out by saying that Nicole is the best dancer they've ever had on the show, but she and Derek are dancing side-by-side instead of as one. Len loved the whole thing, although he saw a few problems when they were in hold. Bruno calls her "dancing royalty." Okay, am I the only one who notices her weird facial expressions? I know its nitpicky, but still. Bruno thinks the routine was so difficult that Nicole made a few small mistakes, but it was only due to the difficulty. Scores: Carrie Ann 9, Len 9, and Bruno 9. How can you tell someone that they're the best dancer that the show ever had and then give them 9s? I don't get it.
Last week, Pam was told that she needed to refine her technique. So Pam and Damian went to a wildlife center? Where she learned to refine her dancing technique? I don't know. Anyway, Pam says that it's her stress relief, cleaning out animal cages. Ohhhh kay. Back in the studio, Pam and Damian work on the waltz, and he actually ties their pelvises together with a piece of fabric to help her with the hips. Pam gets all flustered. It's cute. Oh, they're dancing to "At This Moment" by Billy Vera and the Beaters. I've loved this song since it was on Family Ties. It starts off beautifully, but there are a few wobbles, and there's one part where Pam lifts her leg up like a dog peeing on a hydrant. What was that?
Len says this was a quieter waltz than Nicole's, and he thinks Pam needs to work on firming up her upper body. Bruno tells her that she was pure and demure and got the character right, but her hold was lacking. Carrie Ann saw huge improvement in her legs, and she loved the tone of the routine. Scores: Carrie Ann 8, Len 8, and Bruno 8. Their best scores yet! It's a good night so far.
Niecy and Louis did a comedic tango last week, and earned her highest scores yet. And yet, she ended up in the bottom two. This week, they have the quickstep. Niecy compares their relationship to a divorced couple that has to work it out for the kids, and then she scolds Louis for texting Kelly Osbourne. I really love her. She's not the best dancer, but I'll miss her when she goes. Niecy's footwork is actually good for the routine but there's something off. I think it's that she's too much in her head and her personality's not coming through? Hard to say.
Bruno tells her that she looks gorgeous and her footwork was better than ever. Carrie Ann agrees and says that everything worked well and she was light on her feet. Len agrees with the others and advises her to lift her rib cage up. She retorts, "I got a lot to lift, Len!" Niecy is thrilled with those great comments. Scores: Carrie Ann 9, Len 8, and Bruno 8. Niecy starts screaming at the 9 and then starts crying and screams, "I can dance! Ahhhh!"
Last week, Evan and Anna did not do as well as they've done throughout the competition. Evan apologizes to Anna for their slide, and asks her to push him harder this week in rehearsal for their tango. Their rehearsal footage looks amazing, so I can't wait to watch the actual routine. I want Anna to teach me how to dance. She's hardcore. By the way, why are they doing the Argentine tango? I have given up trying to figure out who does which dances this season. It seems totally random. Their routine by the way? Wow. A real departure for Evan. It's sharp and almost violent, and I dig it. He has some weird lines, but the character of it is great and he does not let up. Great choreography from Anna too.
Carrie Ann tells Evan that he has the eye of the tiger, because he was so focused and sexy. Len says that he's going to dust off his unused ten paddle for them because it was fantastic. Bruno tells Evan he danced like an alpha male, and was everything a girl would want. Scores: Carrie Ann 10, Len 10, Bruno 10. The first perfect score of the season and well deserved. Anna is so cute, jumping around and smiling.
Now it's time for the Cha Cha Challenge, and the first team to go is Team Gaga. It's Pam and Damian, Chad and Cheryl, and Nicole and Derek. The ytalk about how they do thirty seconds together at the top, then solos, then another group segment at the end. They all want Pam to go first, and Nicole to go last. Looks like Derek is handling most of the choreography. Everyone but Nicole has struggles, so let's see how it goes as they dance to "Telephone." Their group segment is good. I couldn't figure out why they put Nicole and Derek on the left side instead of in the center until I realized it's because they're in front of the judges' table. Pam's solo has flashes of goodness, but she seems to screw up a few steps and her splits are just... not good. I don't know why they put those in the routine. Chad and Cheryl do great, although there's a lot of Chad standing there while Cheryl dances around. Nicole and Derek's portion is good but Nicole is kind of hunched over and making those weird aggressive faces that I didn't like last week. She does a split that only emphasizes how bad Pam's were. Oops. The final group segment is pretty good but the goddamn camera angles keep switching and I feel like we missed something good. It's not as good as last season's group number.
Len thought that the group segments were great, and he really likes Nicole's segment. Bruno thought the end segment was great, compliments Pam for keeping up with the others, and thinks Chad turned up the heat. Carrie Ann compliments "the sexual energy" the team has. Pamela looks like she might faint. I'm a little worried about her. Backstage, they must be running short because Brooke just keeps asking dumb questions until they finally reveal the scores: Carrie Ann 9, Len 9, and Bruno 9.
Team Madonna is up , and the members are Niecy and Louis, Evan and Anna, and Erin and Maks. They decide that they'll start sharp and end sharp and Louis says that means Niecy is in the middle. Niecy protests until Maks tells her that she's the centerpiece. Niecy, who has done the cha cha, helps out Evan, who has not. She tells him he looks like a scarecrow and Mr. Bojangles. I wish Niecy was a judge. Then there's a whole fakey segment where they all text each other which is boring. Just bring on the dancing! It starts with Erin and Niecy dancing around Evan which kind of goes on too long, but then the rest of the group segment is good. Evan and Anna go first and he actually looks like he's having fun, but he still does look kind of like a scarecrow. I do think it's more hip action than we've seen from him, ever. Niecy and Louis are adorbs. Seriously. I think she screws up a little bit at the end, but otherwise, her segment is my favorite. Erin and Maks are not as good as I'd hoped. I mean, it's good, and Erin looks eerily like Madonna at times, but I expected better. The final segment gets a bit messy, though.
Bruno compliments Niecy and then says that they lost sync at the end. Carrie Ann enjoyed how much fun they had and thinks they should have ripped off the skirt earlier. Len commends them all for learning two dances in a week. So now they must be running late, because the judges barely had time to speak. At least I know this show will end on time, AMERICAN IDOL. God, that annoys me. No excuse. This show is also live and it always ends on time. There's no reason Idol has to screw up my Glee recording every week. Brooke asks some dumb questions when everyone just wants to hear the scores. Scores: Carrie Ann 8, Len 8, and Bruno 8. So this team's scores hurt the couples, while most of them were helped on Team Gaga.
I kind of don't want anyone to go home. I like all of the remaining couples. I guess I would do without Nicole and Derek, but they're not going anywhere. Here are the final standings (individual + team = total):
Evan and Anna: 30 + 24 = 54
Nicole and Derek: 27 + 27 = 54
Chad and Cheryl: 25 + 27 = 52
Erin and Maks: 27 + 24 = 51
Pamela and Damian: 24 + 27 = 51
Niecy and Louis: 25 + 24 = 49
Watch just the dances to judge the performances for yourself.
Check out an interview with DWTS star Evan Lysacek, including his response to Johnny Weir's snipes.
Want to immediately access TWoP content no matter where you are online? Download the free TWoP toolbar for your web browser. Already have a customized toolbar? Then just add our free toolbar app to get updated on our content as soon it's published.