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Team Bartowski captures a Ring contractor named Rafe, who was hired to kill a mysterious someone. Chuck uses the Intersect to assume Rafe's identity to hilarious effect, and spends the episode with Pauly Walnuts and Edgar from 24, who ultimately tell him his kill is Daniel Shaw. But instead of killing him (duh), Chuck listens in as Sarah expresses her disappointment to him about how Chuck's changing and she doesn't like it. It makes her want to be herself, and her real name is Sam. How very anticlimactic. Though it's a name, so I guess we had to figure it would be. Anyway, Rafe escapes and kills Pauly and Edgar, but before he can kill Sarah in front of her two boyfriends, Casey gets to use a giant gun to make a shot that only five people in the world can make. Thankfully he's one of them. Rafe's dead, and everyone's happy. Only not quite.
Chuck has been sleeping with Hannah all episode and even introduces her to his family in a cute dinner with Ellie and Awesome (weirdly but deliciously prepared by Shaw and Sarah). But after he listens in on Sarah and Shaw and watches Rafe die, he heads to dinner with Hannah and her parents. Only instead of sitting down and making it through the dinner like a normal person, he pulls her aside and dumps her. She says she thought he was a nice guy, and when he says he still is, she points out that he slept with her last night and now is breaking up with her. She fails to add that it's during dinner with her parents, but I guess that's implied. At the same time this is happening, Sam's finally moving on from Chuck: Since Shaw is trapped in Castle now that the Ring knows he's alive, she brings him takeout and then they make out.
Meanwhile, in Buymoria, Big Mike and Jeffster! make gumbo in an attempt to sell Crock Pots.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Some things Chuck wants us to know: Hannah wanted to know who Sarah was, because she liked him. Shaw hit on Sarah. Ellie was delighted to catch Chuck smooching Hannah, his "secret girlfriend." Now, Awesome hangs upside-down exercising as Ellie says she can't believe Chuck hasn't told her about Hannah. She remembers him telling her about his first crush: Mrs. Seaver, the mom from Growing Pains. Ellie says Devon used to tell her everything too and wonders if he's keeping anything else from her. He says he's not in a high-pitched, Awesome The Terrible Liar voice so she feels his pulse and says it's racing. He points out, rightly and wrongly, that he's exercising, then deflects by getting her to go talk to Chuck instead.
At Chuck's, Ellie gives a long-winded speech outside the bathroom door where someone's showering. As we all know, when this happens on TV, the person in the shower is never the person that the one outside the door is talking to. She goes on and on about him not telling her stuff anymore, and how she wishes she'd known about "the new girl," and she won't tell Sarah if he doesn't want her to. Hannah comes out in a towel, and introduces herself. Ellie says she's embarrassed, but doesn't leave. Chuck comes back in with donuts and introduces everyone very awkwardly. I know you wouldn't think he could have made that situation any more awkward, but he totally did, especially when he tells Ellie that Hannah's his "close friend -- technically as close as two people can get." Hannah goes to get dressed, and Ellie and Chuck mutually apologize to each other. Chuck's going to make it up to her by making her favorite: his chicken pepperoni. Which it's obvious she does not love. Also: What the hell is chicken pepperoni? Sarah says she's glad Chuck's moving on from Sarah, but his face makes it obvious he isn't really.
Sarah and Shaw are having a very sunny lunch that looks romantic, judging by the way he's eating her dessert and all. She says they shouldn't see each other, and he asks if this is a preemptive breakup. As they talk, we see someone putting a fancy gun together somewhere. She says she has to stop mixing her personal and professional lives. He tells her he gets it, then leans in romantically and says the vehicle in question has arrived. Casey, listening in, "Roger that." Man, poor Casey has to listen in on a lot of personal and professional life mingling, doesn't he. A mean guy threatens a valet, then Casey shoots him with the tranq gun we've been watching him put together. Sarah and Shaw pop him in the car and peel away.
At Castle, Sarah briefs ... no one, really, since they all knew what they were doing. I guess she's briefing us. The bad guy is Rafe, who is one of five people who can hit a target with a gun from half a mile away. And he's a chameleon and very few people have seen his face. Casey's not impressed, but Sarah says the Ring is, as they've wired $1 million into his account. Shaw says the enemy of their enemy is their friend, so they need to know who the Ring wants dead. Casey says he's perfect for this mission, since there's nothing this clown Rafe can do that he can't do. Shaw says Casey might be perfect for the mission, but they're going with Chuck on this one, and he's going to assume Rafe's identity. They talk about how he's ready, and then he comes in acting all goofy with a box of donuts. Shaw asks what's with him, and Casey says he must have gotten lucky on his date last night. Sarah looks uncomfortable. They catch Chuck up on Rafe (actually, once his name's said aloud, his Intersect brain catches him up). Then they tell him he's going to assume the identity of the world's most dangerous assassin.
Shaw and Sarah teach Chuck about assuming an alias, how even his innate reflexes have to change. Shaw slaps him across the face to get his point across. The plan: Casey's going to get the details of who Rafe's meeting and Chuck's going to go in as Rafe. Chuck's like, "Good luck with that," since Rafe's not really the type to spill details of his top-secret kills, but Casey fires up a blowtorch and says he can be very persuasive. Chuck follows him, to learn about Rafe. He actually says to the world's most dangerous assassin: "Assassin isn't exactly something one finds at a booth at career day. How did you become interested in this line of work?" Then "What was your most dangerous hit?" When Rafe says, "I'll take the torture over this man's questions," Chuck repeats it perfectly, impressing himself and Casey. Rafe's phone rings, and Chuck answers it in Rafe voice. He sets up the meeting with the caller, which he knows because it's right across from the cupcake place. Casey: "Not bad, Bartowski." Chuck: "Who the hell is Bartowski?" Me: "Why do they keep saying Chuck's real name in front of the world's most dangerous assassin?" Opening credits.
Buy More. Hannah and Chuck are inappropriately making out while at work, which is just one reason we know the relationship is doomed. Jeffster! whisper about what a way Chuck has with the ladies, then Big Mike starts his lecture on why he has them all gathered (minus Morgan, who's at a leadership seminar, apparently): Crock Pots. They received more than expected and have to find a way to sell them, so Big Mike's solution is to cook some yummy-smelling gumbo to make people want to buy one and cook. Hannah and Chuck get cuddly and Jeffster! narrows down Chuck's magic with women to LSD or sorcery. Big Mike puts Jeffster! on chopping and dicing detail. Speaking of cooking, Chuck tells Casey he needs to be out of tonight's mission by 5 so he can prepare his special chicken pepperoni recipe. Casey growls for him to get his priorities straight.
Castle. Sarah's handcuffing Rafe, who tells her he sees how Shaw looks at her, but surely has no clue what to do to a beautiful woman like Sarah, but Rafe does. She cuffs his legs to the chair, as Shaw listens from outside the cell. Rafe laughs that he'd take good care of her, and Sarah leaves the room. Shaw goes in behind her and punches Rafe in the face. Now he's ready to move on. Back at the Buy More, Hannah and Chuck are still kissing, and it's really weird. Hannah says she'll be thinking about last night while she's on her install. He pretends he has an install too, and says he'll pick her up before dinner. Jeffster! continues being jealous.
At Castle, Chuck's hairs all slicked back and he's out of Buy More gear, so he's obviously ready to pass as an assassin. Casey comes in wearing a black trench coat, and says the moron can't go in alone. Shaw and Sarah explain the guys Chuck's meeting are more "old-fashioned." Cut to Pauly Walnuts and Edgar from 24, in what we're obviously supposed to think is a mafia bar. Chuck and Casey enter, and the Wimpiest Mafia in History (I mean, you do remember Edgar from 24, don't you?) tell "Rafe" his reputation precedes him. Chuck introduces his associate, John, but tells them he doesn't talk much. Pauly recognizes Casey from somewhere, but Casey says that's not likely. "Rafe" tells Pauly and Edgar that not many people have seen his face and lived, so they should consider themselves lucky. Pauly repeats that Casey looks familiar. Edgar hilariously tells Rafe he's a huge fan of his work and wonders what was his toughest hit. Chuck slams down his cup and asks if he thinks it's okay to ask a guy he just met something personal like that. Edgar and Pauly look afraid until Chuck fake-laughs and they all chuck along. "Rafe" says the toughest assignment's always the one. "You forget that, and you die."
In the van, Shaw asks if Sarah's okay and she says she just thinks this alias thing must be hard for Chuck, since he's not a very good liar. Shaw says he sounds pretty good, but she says he's not like them: used to living someone else's life. Bad dialogue as Sarah mopes about how she barely remembers who she is anymore. Inside, Pauly re
members Casey as a hotshot sniper he served with awhile back. He asks if the name Alex Coburn rings a bell. It does for Chuck's Intersect. He gets snipery images, but weirdly no face of Alex Coburn. He looks at Casey, who gives away nothing. Pauly pulls a gun, and Sarah and Shaw discuss how to get Casey out of there. Chuck Rafes it up, and asks if they're implying his guy is a fed. They are, so Chuck takes a gun and punches Casey with it. "If he's a cop, I'll kill him myself." Casey and Chuck stare each other down, and it's hard to tell if they want to make out or fight.
Commercials. Sorry, Applebees, but "wonton tacos" don't sound appealing, even if you pay John Corbett to talk about them.
When we're back, Casey's duct-taped to a chair as Chuck points a gun at him. Pauly and Edgar want him to stop stalling, but Sarah tells him to keep stalling. Chuck puts his gun down and says he's not a murderer; he's an assassin. He kills as a means to something, and in this case, it's to get information, which he wouldn't get from a dead guy. He asks Casey who the leak is, and Casey says he's not telling him. Then, through his teeth, "Sell it." Pauly offers Chuck some torture tools, and Chuck grabs pliers and heads toward Casey. They communicate with their eyes, Casey telling Chuck to pull a tooth and Chuck not wanting to. Until he finally relents and does it. Just then, the feds bust in to rescue Casey. Sarah corners Chuck, who tells her he's freaking out. She tells him to stop it. He's not him; he's Rafe, and needs to think about what he'd do in this situation. So Chuck flashes and takes out all the cops with his kung-fu fighting, including Sarah. Then he, Pauly, and Edgar get the heck out of there. "Rafe" tells them to split up and he'll contact them later. Edgar says he's incredible. Inside, Casey's impressed by Chuck and Sarah looks mopey again (although very pretty with her hair up -- apparently she put it up before going in to save them in an emergency situation -- and black eyeliner).
Castle. Chuck shows up and says he has a lot to do, but Casey says Shaw and Sarah went to his place to fix dinner since they knew he wouldn't have time. Chuck's surprised, and Casey says, "Weird huh? Walker helping you get laid." Chuck apologizes about Casey's tooth, and Casey says he got the one with a cavity, saving him a trip to the dentist. He tells Chuck he's proud of him, and even though he's a little disgusted with himself for saying that, it's very cute. Some government guys lead Rafe through the room to interrogation, but he freaks out a little and they knock him down onto the table to a Buy More pen. After he's out, Chuck asks about the name Alex Coburn, and Casey tells him to mind his own damn business.
Buy More. Chuck vaguely notices his pen's missing, but then greets Hannah with a kiss as Big Mike and Jeffster! stir gumbo and talk about Chuck's way with the ladies: Jill, Lou, and now Hannah. Jeffster! says none of the other women matter because Chuck's eyes light up with Sarah. Big Mike starts crying, and blames the onions he's chopping. Speaking of Sarah, she and Shaw are readying the food. When she hears the couples approaching, she throws a knife onto the cheese plate (it lands perfectly, of course) and they hide or sneak out or something.
Awesome asks Chuck how he found time to do this since he worked all day, and Chuck says it's a juggling act, but then calls Awesome into the kitchen to tell him the truth, but Awesome's like, "No!" He doesn't want to know anything, because he can't lie to Ellie anymore. He says he's not like Chuck. Chuck tells him to just tell Ellie "I don't know," which isn't a lie. At dinner, Ellie tells Chuck she's been lying for years about liking this dish, but it's finally good. She asks Devon if he can believe Chuck made this, and Devon says, "I don't know." Ellie asks him if the chicken isn't moist, and Devon's like, "Um." God, I love him. Note to show: Use Awesome more. Hannah proposes a toast, which is all about how she's in the right job with the right guy and at a great meal. She thanks them all, and then laughs awkwardly. It's adorable, and everyone seems to agree.
We cut from Chuck smiling at her sweetly to Sarah, watching it all at Castle, looking devastated. Shaw comes in behind her and we get a weird close-up of him looking ... I don't know, emotional? He offers her some of the chicken he snuck out, but she says she's not hungry and asks if he has this covered. He says he does, and she leaves him standing there looking pretty. Meanwhile, Rafe's in a car with the agents, using Chuck's Buy More pen to unlock his handcuffs. Commercials.
Buy More the day. Chuck's staring at Rafe's phone when Hannah comes up and takes it from him and asks if it's new. He says it is, and it's a work thing. She then tells him she knows this is quick, but her family's coming to town and she'd love them to meet him tonight for dinner. He agrees to, then Big Mike comes over and drags him away to help with their cooking. After they heard how much Hannah loved Chuck's food, they want his expert advice. They force-feed him, and his phone (still with Hannah) rings. She answers it "Burbank Buy More." They disagree with Chuck's assessment of food, and Chuck sees Hannah's hanging up the phone. He asks what that was, and she says they were asking for someone named Rafe. She told him it was a Buy More phone, but the guy wouldn't listen and said he'd be here in a couple minutes. Uh-oh.
She goes to help a customer, conveniently, so Chuck removes his tie, puts a bottle of something on his hair and then grabs a black jacket. Out back, he starts to use his watch to call Castle or something, but Pauly and Edgar come up and ask what he's doing with that watch. It's very ominous, as they rip it off and smash it. But they just don't think it's nice enough for him, and they give him a fancy gold watch. Edgar asks what he's doing at Buy More anyway, and Chuck says a man's gotta have hobbies. He was here browsing music. Edgar and Pauly praise and thank Chuck for what he pulled off today. So they returned the favor by tracking down the name of the guy he's supposed to kill. "Rafe" says this is very good news and they all laugh until "Rafe" stops them with "Enough."
Sarah knocks on Shaw's door. He's in a towel and nothing else, looking awfully shirtless and sexy. She starts to talk until she realizes how distracting his body is and asks him to put clothes on. He does, but not before showing off his abs a couple more times. Anyway, Sarah came to apologize about last night, and he says it's not necessary. He asks if she's okay with the Chuck-Hannah thing. She appreciates him asking, but says that's not the change she's having trouble with. Meanwhile, Edgar and Pauly lead Chuck into a room with a giant gun and show him his mark, a half-mile away in a hotel room. They remind him that's far enough that only five people in the world could make the shot. Chuck puts on some sort of super headphones that let him hear into the room and looks through the gun scope. It's Shaw and Sarah, of course. So he gets to listen to the rest of Sarah's thoughts. The change she doesn't like is Chuck being a lying spy, becoming a different person. She says the more he changes to become a spy, the more she wants to be herself, who she was before all this. Shaw says if this is her, he likes her and wants more. Sarah says she's never told anyone on this assignment her real name, in three years, not even Chuck. Shaw asks what it is, and says she never seemed like a Sarah. She says it's cause she's not. Her real name is Sam. Chuck says, "Sam." Shaw tells her he's going to kiss her now, and they do kiss. It's not unpleasant.
Chuck gets up from the gun and repeats, "Sam?" Pauly and Edgar ask who Sam is, and say the guy he's supposed to whack is Daniel Shaw, who the Ring thought was dead, though it turns out he's not dead yet. Uh, duh. So who the hell is Sam? Chuck says Sam's the girl, his girl, "sorta." He says they're on again, off again, driving everyone in his life a little crazy. Edgar and Pauly asks what's keeping them apart if they love each other (is anyone else a little insulted at who they chose to represent the fan voice here?), and Chuck says it's complicated, and Sam's always the one pushing him to be better at his job. Edgar's like, "Wait a second. The guy you're supposed to whack is banging your girl?" Pauly says this unlucky guy's about to get double dead.
At Castle, Casey's calling in a situation to someone, since he can't contact the agents who were transporting the real Rafe. He calls someone else and asks for Chuck's last known location. Pauly asks "Rafe" what he's waiting on, and Chuck takes off his coat. As he does it, the real Rafe calls in a trace to his phone, which is in the coat pocket. Chuck tells Pauly and Edgar he's going over there to kill this guy, who he needs to look in the eye before he kills. The other guys stay behind to cover "Rafe." Edgar says his aim's nothing like Rafe's, but he can shoot until everyone's dead. Chuck's like, "Yeah, that's ... real good." Casey gets a fix on Chuck's location, too, so it looks like everyone will be convening with Pauly and Edgar.
Except Chuck, who's now at Shaw's, banging on the door. He pushes Shaw, and both he and Sarah ask what's up. By way of explanation, Chuck says his problem is that "nobody. Messes. With Rafe Gruber." He grabs Shaw, and Pauly and Edgar look at each other approvingly. Shaw tells Chuck to take his hands off him, but he won't. He says he's going to kill him for taking his girl, for taking Sam. Shaw and Sarah look shocked, and Shaw says, "You had your chance, and you blew it." Chuck gives him what I think is an actual, angry punch to the face for saying that. It was a little below the belt. Sarah and the guys watch as Shaw gets the best of Chuck. Well, Pauly and Edgar only watch until Rafe comes in and kills them. Rafe sees what's going on over there and, instead of using his one-of-five-in-the-world skills, runs the half-mile and walks in on Chuck pleading with Shaw to stop it since they're supposed to think he's Rafe and they're going to kill all of them. Rafe says he's actually going to be the one doing that. Sarah and then Shaw try to fight him.
Casey shows up to find Pauly and Edgar dead, as Rafe gets the best of Sarah and Shaw and moves on to Chuck. Chuck keeps telling himself to flash, but he doesn't, so Rafe tosses him aside when Shaw tries once more. Rafe picks up Sarah and both Shaw and Chuck say, "No, please don't!" Rafe says they both have it bad for "this blonde," and while
he can't blame them, he's going to make it easy on them and take her out of the equation. He holds a gun to her head, and then we see both guys yell "No!" as we get a close-up of her face as she falls. But, duh, Sarah's not dead. She gets up, and the camera follows the bullet hole back to Casey, with the big gun. He smacks it and tells himself he guesses he's one of the five people in the world who can make this shot. Dude, when did Casey become the happiest person on this show?
Later that night, Chuck shows up at Ellie's because she said he could come to her to talk. She says yeah, to start at the beginning, but doesn't ask him for some reason. As Daniel Zott starts playing "Living A Lie" (which is really, really beautiful), he tells her he feels like he's living a lie and can't compartmentalize these things anymore. He feels like he's not himself. Ellie says maybe he's moving too soon with Hannah because he's not over Sarah. He tells her this is why he doesn't come talk to her, because she's "half a spy." What? That doesn't even make sense to me, and I know Chuck's secret. Ellie apologizes and says maybe that's not it, but apparently he means that she's half a spy, so she gets it and figured it out? She's an excellent half a spy. He thanks her. Whatever.
The music continues as he shows up at the restaurant where Hannah's waiting with her parents. Sarah looks torn at Castle, and looks at Shaw. Chuck walks up and doesn't even meet her parents, just asks if they can talk for a minute. Sarah grabs her stuff and leaves Castle without a word to Shaw. Outside the restaurant, Hannah asks Chuck what's wrong, and he tells her there are things in his life she can't understand he can't explain. He says he's been dishonest and it's not fair, so he has to end this. She gets teary as he says she deserves to be with someone she can get to know completely. She goes from upset to mad and says she thought he was a nice guy. He says he is, but she says no, he's not, since they slept together last night and now he's dumping her. He tries to say it's not like that, but really, it is. I mean, how can Chuck think this is a justified course of action. And, also: WHY is he doing it? It makes no sense, other than Kristin Kreuk's episodes are up. She asks him to explain, but he says nothing. She says she's dated a lot of liars, so can usually spot them, but he's the best she's ever seen. She closes with a dagger to his heart: "I hope your lies keep you warm at night."
Back at Castle, Sarah returns with a couple bags and smiles as she heads toward Shaw. She tells him that now that the Ring knows he's alive, she bought him a Crock Pot, since they're practically giving them away at the Buy More. He laughs, and she gives him Chinese takeout. She says Castle's outside the delivery radius. Shaw says, "Thank you. Sam." And she looks at him seriously, thoughtfully, sort of like you'd look at the guy who you decided got to be the guy you told your secret, I guess. Then she leans in and they kiss. Again, not all that unpleasant, but it is stupid that she moped about Chuck all episode, and now she's fully in with Shaw, and we end on a mopey Chuck, walking alone at night. How many more ways can they come up with to keep these two apart? I'm guessing more than we want to know.
week: Chuck gets called in by Shaw and Sarah and told if he doesn't start flashing again, he's no longer a spy. Man. Harsh! Some suits come to the Buy More to eliminate the non-essential personnel, but Casey quickly realizes they're after Castle. One of them asks another if he really thinks Chuck is "Agent Carmichael." The promo monkeys want us to know that Chuck's secret becomes ... not a secret anymore. Because just what this show needs is another reinvention, right?