Love and Spying Don't Mix

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It's a good thing they aired two episodes in one night, because that first one was all set up/explanation for new viewers, but this one gave fans of the show some explanations and development. When we pick up this week, Sarah and Chuck are both mourning the end of the possibility of their relationship in their own way: Sarah's out on the town with Carina, and Chuck's moping at home with Morgan. Eventually, though, Morgan talks Chuck into heading out himself, and they run into Carina and Sarah. Morgan still has a crush on Carina because, well, she's hot. But she's engaged to arms dealer Vinnie Jones. His feelings for her are real, but she's just after his big weapon.

Chuck and Sarah pose as a couple (again) and attend Carina and Vinnie's engagement party. Casey plays the role of her (youthful) uncle. The weapon is conveniently located at the same mansion as the engagement party, so Chuck and Sarah slip away during Vinnie's toast to retrieve it. Chuck wants to talk, slowing the mission down considerably. Sarah promises they'll talk after, so he flashes and then uses his super spy moves to get through a room filled with laser-beam security. He sets of the alarm at the end, though, and Vinnie's goons come. They listen to Chuck spill his love for Sarah, which gives her time (as does Casey's long-winded toast to the happy couple) to knock them out and rescue him. Vinnie and his gang realize Carina's not who she says she is and they crash the housewarming party Morgan's throwing to impress her.

Eventually, of course, the good guys win out. And Morgan and Carina have sex (because he grew a pair and told her "no," which she found incredibly sexy). Sarah and Chuck talk a little, but don't say anything new. In the end, Sarah decides not to leave with Carina, and then she watches the video footage of Chuck spilling his heart to her in the locked weapon room. It's sweet, and hopefully makes her less angry that he chose to be a spy to save the world (and her), like she taught him, instead of running away with her. Oh, and General Redhead has a dangerous secret that she wants to tell Casey, Chuck, and Sarah, but a faceless guy named "Shaw" won't let her. Now we only have to wait a day to get more, and hopefully that answer will be part of it.

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Even though this episode starts right where the last one ended, we get some previouslies in case you're just tuning in: Carina came for a visit. Chuck gave Sarah a charm bracelet. She tried to get him to run away together, but he chose to be a spy. Repetitive Sarah-Chuck angst.

A guy's running through the woods with a case, but a badly scarred Vinnie Jones has him in his sights (his gun sights, that is). He's with a couple of other bad guys. He shoots the guy a couple times, but gets a phone call. He tells whoever's on the end he'll call them back, but he's in the middle of something for work. Then, "I love you too, Smooshy." He hangs up, glares at his snickering cohorts, and shoots the guy again.

At a club, Sarah's out for drinks with Carina. Sarah's enjoying just having time off, and wonders how long Carina's here. She hopes not long, since L.A. has "all of the cultural panache of a porta-potty." Carina wonders why Sarah's still here, protecting a doof at a video store. Sarah says she doesn't want to talk about work, and Carina assumes they're sleeping together. Sarah says their relationship is totally professional, which leads Carina to say "Oh my god, Walker. You're breaking the cardinal rule of spying, aren't you?" They drink fancy drinks, and we cut to Morgan and Chuck drinking canned soda, as Morgan says that Chuck's breaking the cardinal rule of getting dumped by moping around, playing video games. Morgan takes his game controller, and Chuck's like, "Can you please at least pause the game?" Morgan talks about how incredible their bachelor lives are and the camera pans out to the empty apartment they're sitting in. Morgan talks Chuck into going out to find some eligible ladies, since "they can't all say no to us."

They enter a club, where Morgan quickly tries to hit on girls (failing colossally, as usual). Chuck's not sure he's ready for this, but Morgan says he's just here to forget about Sarah ... then he spots Sarah, who's with Carina. Morgan wonders if Carina would remember him, since they went on that one date. Chuck says he's going to "do a little spy work" and suss out the situation with Carina, while Morgan gets drinks. Chuck greets Carina and Sarah, who asks if he's spying on her. He says he's just out for an innocent evening with an old friend (cut to Morgan not having luck making it to the bar to get drinks). Vinnie Jones comes up and grabs Carina. They hug and kiss, and Carina introduces him as her fiancée Karl to her best friend, Sarah, and Chuck, her boyfriend. Chuck and Sarah play along. There's a lot of making out and "I love you Smooshy." "I love you Smoosh." from Carina and Karl. He leaves, and Chuck tells Carina how in love they seem. Then he notices Vinnie's scar and flashes on him being an arms dealer. He tries to tell Carina, and she says she knows. "You think I'm an idiot? It's the cardinal rule: Spies don't fall in love." Sarah glares. She welcomes them to their new mission. Opening credits. Again.

Big Mike's back at the Buy More, in a fancy red and black suit. He has his crew all lined up as he explains that everything's changing: He's wearing a suit because he's here to do his finest. He wonders if they are, too, and looks right at Chuck, then Jeff. They both say they are. Big Mike says he's learned much from his business class at El Segundo School of Finance: Mostly he's learned that there's no word for "no" in Japanese (not true), and a lot of words for yes. He wants his employees to no longer understand the meaning of the word no.

Cut to Chuck telling Morgan no, he doesn't have any more intel on the guy Carina left the club with. Morgan thinks she can't have real feelings for him, though, and Chuck agrees that's a safe bet. Lester wonders who the female they're referencing is, and Morgan says she's basically a Swedish supermodel, the country's greatest export since Bjorn Borg. Jeff pipes up to say people mistake him for him all the time. Which is hilarious, because ... well: Look. Morgan says they dated awhile back, but drifted apart, but she's back in town and he's thinking of hitting that again. Lester tells Morgan there's no way "that a girl like you could get a woman like the one you're describing." David Lee Roth starts singing then, as Carina enters with full wind effects and in slow-motion and Morgan asks them why she's there, then, if not to talk to him. She walks right by him and up to Chuck to tell him he's needed downstairs. As she leads him out, Lester tells Morgan, "Well, she seems really into you." Hee.

Downstairs, General Redhead's explaining their mission: Carina's working undercover as the girlfriend of Karl, a suspected arms smuggler. Carina says they learned that $10 million was recently wired into Karl's account for a weapon; they don't know what it is, but someone's willing to pay a lot of money for it. Chuck says they have to get it before it falls into the wrong hands. Carina: "Thanks for being on the case, Nancy Drew." (What's with all the Nancy Drew references on NBC in the past week?) Anyway, Carina's having an engagement party today at Karl's house. Sarah and Chuck will go using their boyfriend-girlfriend cover. And Casey will pose as Carina's father. Casey protests she should check her mouth, and he'll play her brother. Chuck tells him that he thinks he has dungarees older than Carina. General Redhead says he will assume the identity of Carina's uncle. Casey says, "Carina's father's much younger brother." Carina explains the mission: There's a weapon in a secret vault room in the house. She'll access the key he keeps in his pants, and Sarah and Chuck will slip out while he's making his toast to break in and get the weapon. She hopes they can handle the state-of-the-art security system Karl just installed in the vault room. Sarah says Chuck's recent training has prepared him for this, so it won't be a problem. General Redhead says this whole mission rides on Chuck. He beats me to the punch by saying, "What a surprise."

Back at the Buy More, everyone's in the backroom (not sure who's running the store, but all of their customers are criminals anyway). Morgan's insisting he could nail Carina if he wanted to, so Jeffster! would like him to prove it. Morgan says she's seeing someone, but Lester didn't see a ring (shouldn't there be a ring, though?). Morgan's taking it slow, to which Jeff replies, "You snooze, you lose boobs." Lester suggest they throw a housewarming party for Morgan and Chuck tonight, and Jeff will prepare his special punch. Morgan agrees, and they're all, "Party is on, nerds!" And, man, they really are nerds.

Chuck's suiting up for the engagement party, and Morgan wants to know if it's a date and if he and Sarah are getting back together. Chuck says it's not a date, and no. Then Sarah calls, and Chuck tells her he's almost out the door. Not exactly convincing Morgan there. Sarah and Carina are getting ready, sexy spy style, to "Sexy Bitch" -- putting on their slinky dresses with hidden weapons, including a very cool knife in the heel of a shoe and guns strapped to their legs. Carina finds Sarah's charm bracelet and suggests she wear it since it's what some sucker in love might wear. It's not Sarah's thing. She looks sad, and Carina asks if she wants to talk about what happened with Chuck. Sarah doesn't talk, so Carina asks if Sarah wants to leave with her to St. Tropez after they wrap this assignment. Sarah asks if Carina ever wonders about a different life, if all this was real. Carina seems thoughtful for a moment, then says, "Nah."

Back at Morgan and Chuck's, Morgan's grilling Chuck on Sarah, then on Carina: Will she be there? If so, he'll run a comb through his beard and come with. Chuck is looking for his keys. Morgan wants Chuck to get Carina an invitation to the housewarming party. Chuck says he will if Morgan will find Chuck's keys. Morgan pulls them out of his pocket, and Chuck says, "Should have known."

At the party, Chuck and Sarah make awkward conversation about love and relationships with Karl and Carina. They're the most obvious liars ever, which I guess is sort of telling since they've always been too good at faking the relationship before. Casey comes in with a wig and moustache, and Carina introduces her "Uncle Johnny, her daddy's brother." Casey: "Kid brother." Karl's glad to meet someone from her family, but isn't sure about the resemblance. Carina: "Daddy and Uncle Johnny share the same thick neck and square head." Chuck's eating baby lamb chop hors d'oeuvres, but Sarah's all focused on where they'll escape to find the vault and when. Chuck tries to talk about this thing hanging over them since Prague. He says he misses her. Sarah watches Karl and Carina excuse themselves from Casey. Chuck goes on that it feels good hanging out as friends like they used to. Sarah says it's just a cover and leaves. Carina watches and heads over to Chuck, asking what the hell he's doing to her mission, since they're supposed to be a happy couple. Chuck says Sarah's been so cold ever since he got back from Prague. Carina calls him an idiot, and says she's been cold because she loves him. She tells him to get his head out of his ass and go be a spy. But he's a little busy being dumbfounded right now.

Chuck chases after Sarah and says Carina said something to him; he knows it's not the best time, but they need to talk. Sarah tells him to focus on the mission, and that Carina's getting the key. In another room somewhere, Carina's giving Karl a pep talk before his toast. They hug and she steals the key from his pocket. Sarah sneaks by and takes it from her. He goes back out and toasts. He says he wants to spend the rest of his life with her. She's real, honest, and good. A toast to the future Mrs. Stromberg. He loves her and kisses her. Sarah and Chuck sneak away. The toast listeners start to break up. Carina asks him if that's it, and he's like, "Uh, no. Also ... may our first child be a masculine child." Weird. Everyone toasts. Chuck and Sarah aren't even to the vault yet, and he's trying to talk to her. She radios to Carina that they just got to the vault and need more time, so Carina calls the crowd back and says her Uncle Johnny's dying to say something.

Casey heads to the staircase and says he's not normally a man of many, or any, words, but he'll make an exception. He remembers the first time he set eyes on Carina, when he was practically still a boy. Cut to Chuck and Sarah, finally opening the vault. Inside are a bunch of moving laser beams. Chuck: "No way." Back with Casey, talking about how warm, kind, approachable, and good at conversation Carina is, and how those qualities are reflected in Karl. Everyone's bored, including me. Maybe they should have made this funnier. Back at the vault, Chuck thinks he can't do it, but Sarah tells him to relax so he'll flash. He thinks they should talk first, so she promises they'll talk later about whatever he wants but he has to do this first. He smiles, then flashes. Then he does this hilariously dorky parody of ridiculous Entrapment-esque spy moves. He does a hand stand, leaps, flips, moves from one side of the room to the other, throws the case back along the ground, and more. When he gets back to her, he tells her now they can talk, but then accidentally touches a laser beam. A door shuts him in. Karl's guys' beeping alarms go off. Chuck doesn't like small spaces, so Sarah tells him to breathe and he'll be fine. She tries to open the door. Gas starts in there, so Chuck says he'll be taking exclusively short breaths from now on. She tells him she'll get him out of there.

She notices a grate and climbs into it, but Chuck doesn't know that, so he starts talking, because he doesn't want to regret not telling her stuff. He babbles about how he's a regular guy, not a spy, that he works at the Buy More. Sarah scoots along in the vents to turn off the gas, as Karl's guys come in and listen to Chuck spill his heart: The decision he made in Prague ... He knows it looks like he chose being a spy over being with her, but that's not what happened. ... How he felt about her was real. ... When Carina told him what she said, those three words he's waited to hear. ... He knows she's probably hurt. The guys are chuckling to themselves, when Sarah drops a lipstick from the vent to distract them, then kicks their asses. She waits until they've entered the vault code, though, so she just has to hit enter. As she does, Chuck says, "Sarah, I love you," and passes out in his arms. She looks like that got to her, even though she only heard those three words. Commercials including one for the season 2 DVD.

Chuck's sleeping off the gas at Castle, when General Redhead congratulates Sarah and Casey for recovering the weapon. She asks how the asset is doing, and Sarah just says, "He'll live." Casey wonders what the weapon is, but General Redhead says that information is above his pay grade, and that Agent Miller will bring it to Langley. They never saw it. She shuts off, and Carina says they wouldn't tell her either. Carina packs up the weapon and asks Sarah if she thought about her offer, as Chuck wakes up and hears it. Sarah says she's still considering it. Carina leaves, and Sarah turns General Redhead back on. She asks her if everything's okay, and Chuck listens as Sarah says it's about Chuck's safety. She thinks that she might be more a part of the problem than the solution with trying to manage his emotions so the Intersect can work. Chuck turns to look at Sarah as she talks. General Redhead doesn't know or want to know what happened, but this is her job, and she needs to get over it and teach him to be a spy. Chuck watches her look sad, and when she turns to him, he quickly looks away but she sees him. So she says it's time to train.

In the training room where he boxed with Casey, she tries to fight him with a bo. She says he has to be a real spy, and he says he is. But she knocks the bo out of his hand, and says a real spy would have flashed on it. She gives him another one and says he would have defended himself. He doesn't try to fight her. She says he can do this, but he says he's too emotional and it doesn't work, and can't they talk first. She says he needs to ignore his feelings, because spies don't have feelings; they get you killed. He needs to bury them in a place deep inside. He ducks a hit from her, and she keeps trying to fight. She tells him to show her his attack skills. He throws down the bo, and says no, "because I don't want to hurt you." She knocks him over with her bo, and says, "Don't worry, Chuck. You can't."

Karl's following Carina to the Buy More. Morgan's leaving Chuck a message that Carina must come to the party (then Jeffster! tell him Chuck can't save him from this lie). Carina walks in, and Big Mike comes out and pep-talks Morgan into going to talk to her. She walks up, calls Morgan "Martin," and asks him to give her broken laptop (actually the weapon) to Chuck. He'll do it on the condition that she come to his party. She says, "Fine, whatever," and then asks him to promise he'll give that to Chuck. She takes off, and Karl and his men follow her into the back. Karl calls her "Smooshy," and wonders if she's getting cold feet. He puts it in the car, and she asks what's going on. He says someone stole something from him, and he's thinking she's a spy. She says it's ridiculous, and she loves him. So he puts on video of Chuck in the vault saying he's not like Carina, a cold-hearted spy who throws around words like love. She mutters she's going to kill Chuck. Karl says he'll take care of that, and grabs the housewarming party flier from her. But he says she's . Commercials.

One of those commercials is more of the spin-off, Journey to Vancouver, with Morgan, Ellie, and Captain Awesome. Morgan's driving now, and Awesome wonders where he's taking them. Morgan: "Have I steered you wrong so far?" Ellie says, "Repeatedly," and Morgan shrugs it off. They come upon a giant statue that Morgan explains is a monument to the lost curler. Ellie and Morgan find it magical, and he says if you listen closely you can still hear him sweeping. Which we can, and Ellie whispers, "Morgan." Then they turn and see Awesome's wiping ice off the windshield. They look at him like he's ruining their fun, and he's all, "What?!"

Housewarming party. It's quite a hit, apparently, spilling out into the courtyard with Jeff's "Jail Juice: Highly Flammable." There's even a sign. Jeffster! find Morgan in his apartment and tell him his girl is here. Morgan fakes, "Of course she is," and Lester's like, "Right." They go out into the courtyard where Karl's manhandling her in with three of his friends. Lester's like, "She showed up with four guys. And no beer." Jeff thanks Morgan for making the party a sausage fest. Lester calls Morgan a loser.

At Castle, Chuck wonders how he can help with Carina, but Sarah and Casey say everyone's looking for her, so he's not needed. Back in the courtyard, Karl asks Morgan if this is Chuck's apartment, and Lester tries to say it's VIP only (there's a sign for that, too). Carina asks "Martin" where Chuck is, and they all push their way inside. She tells him to call Chuck and ask him to come. Morgan calls him instead to ask his advice about Carina. He says he took Big Mike's El Segundo School of Finance advice and invited her, and now she's here, and what should he do? Morgan says she showed up with her boyfriend and three Aqua Velvas. Can you believe it? Chuck says he can. Then he tells Morgan not to tell her off, as he's threatening, but to be aloof, which girls love.

Jeffster! are sitting by the Jail Juice, worrying that those four guys with Carina will ruin their chances with the girls from Underpants Unlimited. Jeff says he's been drinking this Jail Juice since he was in diapers, though, and will challenge them to a drinking contest so they'll pass out. Lester agrees that will help them land the ladies by process of elimination. They take glasses of Jail Juice inside for everyone. Carina trips a nerd, and uses the kerfuffle that follows to pour some powder out of her ring into the four glasses. That's handy! Jeffster! try to get the other guys to drink, but they won't. So Jeffster! each drink one as to not waste them. Lester takes a sip, lets out a high-pitched "Mom used to..." and passes out. Jeff says that guy's got no tolerance and then passes out himself. Karl notices what happened and says it's nice how much Carina thinks so much of the ring he bought her. Morgan peeks in the window and it looks all cuddly to him.

Somehow (through a secret backdoor), Chuck, Casey, and Sarah are now in Casey's apartment. Casey's getting guns ready, but Chuck says he can't go out there blasting since all of his friends and half the mall are out there. Casey wonders if he has a better plan, and Chuck says he does: Carina's still alive, so she hasn't given Karl the case so they have something to negotiate with. Sarah agrees and wonders where the weapon is. They hear Morgan rant about the nerve of the guy in his house with his girl. He heads in the apartment and stands up for himself. He tells Carina his name's Morgan Guillermo Grimes -- "Memorize it!" -- and that just because she's a beautiful woman he'd give a non-vital organ to have sex with doesn't mean she can humiliate him in front of his friends. Karl's like, "Who is this codger?" Morgan tells him to take a hike, and Karl thinks he has to be kidding him. Morgan's really not, and he wants him to take his slabs of beef with him. Karl stands up to fight, and Carina whispers he doesn't have time to deal with the dead bodies. Carina asks Morgan to leave, and he says that, uh, no, this is his place, so she can leave. "That's right, hottie: Bounce." He quotes Big Mike at her, and says if there were a Japanese word for no, he'd say it right now. Instead, he'll leave her with this: Sayonara. Ha. He pulls the case out of the trunk they're using as a coffee table, and tells her to give it to Chuck herself. Then he says not to let the door hit her on the way out. He takes a sip of the Jail Juice and passes out, too. Carina says no one's ever said no to her before.

Casey calls Morgan an idiot, saying now they don't have anything to negotiate with. But Chuck thinks there has to be a contingency plan to clear out his place in case of emergency. He asks where's the button to push to make this happen. Casey says, "Me. I'm the button." He goes out in boxers and a robe with a hose and pretends the party woke him. He sprays everyone and makes them leave. Chuck and Sarah sneak in another way. She tries to give him a gun, but he hates guns. She gives him a torch and says to think of it as a bo. Carina and the bad guys walk out. They see Casey, with his back to them, by a sign the party-throwers set up in front of his place that says "Angry Neighbor! Do not smile at." Karl apologizes for disturbing Casey's sleep. Casey says no problem, but then Sarah jumps out with her guns and Casey draws, too. No one drops their guns, though, and Karl points his at Carina and holds onto her. Karl says he should have known Uncle Johnny was a fake by his paint-peeling speech. He says he's having the worst day of his life, and doesn't give a fat crap. Chuck, holding the torch, notices the "Highly Flammable" Jail Juice and tells Casey and Sarah to trust him and drop their guns. They do, reluctantly. Chuck throws the torch in the jail juice, and knocks a couple of the bad guys back enough to get the upper hand.

Casey and Sarah knock everyone out but Karl, who's still standing back with his gun to Carina. Casey and Sarah pick up their guns and train them on him, but he says if they shoot him, he shoots her and he doesn't care. "Bitch has broken my heart. She dies." Chuck says he gets it: Karl took a chance, he loved someone, maybe for the first time, since all he's ever done is shut off his feelings, because they're a liability in his profession. Sarah's in front of Chuck so we see both of them while he's talking, and it's clearly sinking in. Chuck says Karl might feel like he messed up his life by opening up his heart, but maybe he helped her open up her heart, too. Maybe because he loved her, she's learned how to love too. Carina says he's right. She did fall in love with Karl. He lowers his gun and says, "Really?" She kicks him and takes the gun, then says, "Yeah, right, stupid. Spies don't fall in love." Chuck looks sad, and Sarah looks like she realizes Carina's stronger than she is.

Casey and Sarah are filling out paperwork at Casey's and Chuck sits down by the weapon and starts to open it. General Redhead pops up on the TV and tells him not to touch it. He says he was thinking maybe he could flash on it. She tells him no, thank you, she just needs it to be in safe hands, and Case will stay with it until a team arrives to secure it. That is all. She shuts off and then tells someone whose face we don't see that they can't keep this a secret anymore; it's too dangerous. "We need to tell them. They need to be prepared." She asks "Shaw" please, but he seems to just walk away. And we all know who that guy is already, right? Superman!

The morning, Chuck's picking up the mess left in the courtyard when Sarah comes out. She says she's listening if there's something he wants to say. He's sure she'd rather be somewhere else, but she says she's good here for now. He says he knows he's not a real spy and his emotions make him a liability, but she says not always, since his emotions helped him save Carina by talking Karl down. She says "It's quite a mess we made," and Chuck agrees, but hopes they can clean it up. She says maybe, but he's on his own with the courtyard, and leaves. He hollers for Morgan, and then we cut to a wall of shoes, which are apparently Morgan's. The camera pans around and Morgan's in bed with Carina, all happily post-coital. Chuck's yelling that he's all alone cleaning up Morgan's mess and this better have been worth it. I'm thinking it was for Morgan. Carina's sitting up rubbing him as he lays on his Star Wars pillow. She says she did it because no one's said no to her before, and it's sexy. He asks how he was, and she says she's had better. But not many. Y'all? I think Morgan is a sex god. Ew. And awesome.

At Castle, Carina asks Sarah again if she's going with her. She's decided to stay (or so she says, but we saw General Redhead tell her to). Carina gives her a disk drive and tells her to watch it. They hug and speak Russian to each other, and Carina leaves. Sarah plugs in the zip drive, and watches. It's Chuck in the vault. He says, "Look, Sarah, I know that you're probably very hurt that I didn't run away with you in Prague. I'm sorry. You have to know that you're everything I ever wanted. But how could I run away with you knowing what I'd turn my back on, knowing what I had in my head could help a lot of people? And you're the one who taught me that being a spy's about something bigger. It's about putting aside your own personal feelings for the greater good, and that's what I chose. I chose to be a spy for my friends and my family and you. I chose to be a spy because, Sarah, I love you." Which is when she opened the door and he fell into her arms. She's teary. The end.

Coming this season: Brandon Routh kisses Sarah's neck. Sarah says Chuck's going to become the world's most dangerous assassin. He looks sleek and points a gun. He fights with someone, and announcer guy says the training wheels are off. Casey says, "Not bad, Bartowski." He dances with Sarah. We see a clip of him in the laser beam room. He is operating on Casey's leg and says, "Scalpel," all doctorly. He speaks Japanese, and Sarah looks shocked. He uses nunchucks. He pushes Awesome out of the way and pulls out some guns, killing three guys. Brandon Routh tells him he's going on his first solo mission, and Chuck, Casey, and Sarah all look aghast. A car blows up. Kristin Kreuk asks Chuck what his secret is. And, I don't know about you, but I could have lived without ever hearing her ask someone that again. Paulie Walnuts. Jesse Ventura. Close-up of Angie Harmon asking seductively what it's like being a world-class spy. Sarah entering a room where Brandon Routh's shirtless and sweaty. Then kissing him. Brandon Routh telling Chuck he had his chance, and he blew it. Chuck punches Brandon Rough as the announcer says it's no more Mr. Nice Spy. The new season. I'm so glad it's back. (Although three episodes in two nights is a little much, don't you think?)

DeAnn, a writer and editor in Portland, Oregon, would like to try to drink Jeff under the table with his Jail Juice. You can contact her at twopmodmars@gmail.com.

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