Episode Report Card Monty Ashley: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Lymphs and Limps
By Monty Ashley | Season 8 | Episode 13 | Aired on 02.13.2012
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.Chase is still limping after having been stabbed in the chest last week. You'll have to check last week's recap to make sense out of the biology involved. He doesn't want to come back to be on House's team because he's too busy having meaningless sex, but he's willing to carve out some time for clinic duty. There, he meets a young nun who's got trouble with her lymph nodes.
That trouble promptly spirals out of control and the symptoms include numb feet, abdominal pain and meaningless sex with Dr. Chase. Whoops! And then there are more symptoms, like blood pouring out of every hole in her face. Chase insists on operating on her himself, because why not be as unprofessional as possible? He also tries to talk her out of being a nun, but she eventually does it anyway.
Meanwhile, House is escalating a prank war against Taub, who defends himself with Krav Maga. I did not know that Krav Maga taught you how to block paintballs with a cafeteria tray.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Hey, did you hear that this is going to be the last season of House? Angel Cohn wrote a set of suggestions for how the show could end that I liked. If I get a vote, I'd like to throw my influence behind "Everyone dies of lupus."
Anyway, this episode. Chase wakes up in bed. The lovely young lady he's with tells him he's bleeding through his bandage. And indeed, he has a small bandage on his chest. There's a crutch in the background. His phone buzzes with a call from House, which Chase ignores. He walks away on crutches and takes a moment to tell his lady friend that he was stabbed by a patient. He checks his bandage and his phone buzzes again. It's a text that says "DING DONG." House is at the door. And I guess I should mention that Chase is in his underwear. House leers at the young lady and tells Chase, "If she likes crippled guys, I'm free for the next six minutes." Anyway, House has a sick truck driver he'd like Chase's opinion on. Chase hasn't been answering the texts for the last three weeks. He doesn't know when or if he's coming back. Door shut.
Chase works his quads, I think. It's some kind of thigh-centric physical therapy. Foreman watches. He's glad to see Chase there. The arrhythmia's gone and he's getting back his fine motor control. Chase insists he's fine, but does not appear to want to get back to work. Foreman tries to force him to do 20 clinic hours, which Chase objects to. But then he does it anyway. This was an exciting scene, wasn't it?
In the clinic, Chase has two nuns. One has a pain in her left shoulder. Her enlarged lymph node makes breast cancer a possibility. The older nun leaves, so Chase can now ask the younger one about the possibility angina caused by a "major life change". The blue veil means she's a postulant and the brown habit means she's a Carmelite. Chase was a seminarian, see, so he knows this stuff. She admits that she's had second thoughts about becoming cloistered. Chase finds a little mass on her breast.
Wilson says it's a benign fat deposit. House enters and says that because Wilson was being cagey, he had Park follow him. Chase again reports that he's healing nicely. House is fascinated by the nun's case, which is a good sign for our attempt to have a plot tonight. He says that Chase blames him but shouldn't have learned anything new about him, since everyone already knew that House was a jerk. He stops Chase from leaving and tells him that the nun is suffering from a fungal infection brought on by unprocessed wheat. As Chase leaves, House snarks after him, "Thanks for all my help!"