By M. Giant
Michael's got a full plate this week. Strickler wants Michael to track down a heist crew that stole American equipment, which, since the hideout is across from a bingo parlor, frees Michael up for another Job Of The Week while Madeline runs the surveillance to get out from under her leaky roof. That Job is actually for Barry the Money Launderer, whose client list has been stolen. Through Barry's new girlfriend, Michael and Sam track down the thief and kidnap him, along with the female property manager he's taken hostage. Both of them end up in the team's clutches, locked in the love-nest Sam was supposed to be enjoying with Ms. Reynolds. From there, they track down the IT guy who was supposed to post Barry's client list on the internet, who then reveals that it's the supposedly innocent woman who's the real brains behind the operation. They save Fi, Michael giving her a smack upside the head to maintain their cover, and then let the lady go. They follow her to Barry's ledger, but then Fi has to let her mastermind escape. Now all that's left is for Michael to wrap up his gig for Strickler, without Fi's help. In fact, she says she's leaving Miami. No sooner has Michael finished the job, which he's still pretty uneasy about, than he gets a call from Diego Garza letting him know about a call from D.C. Looks like things are coming together for Michael, even as he mopes about losing Fi. Me, I'm still not seeing the downside.
Discuss this episode in our forums, then see why vlogger Sean Crespo thinks Michael has a pretty sweet deal in No Prior Knowledge!
Michael's prepping for his latest gig, this one with Strickler. He's loading a gun, and Fi's loading... a camera. "When you prepare for a mission, it's the little things that count," he VOs. "Firepower is great, but an operation's more likely to be saved by a fresh set of batteries than a gun." Ooh, can you imagine a gun that shoots batteries? Think about how much it would suck to have your spleen perforated by a nine-volt. Of course, Fi's not happy to be fiddling with AA-cells instead of ammo, plus she's even more unhappy that Michael's unquestioningly going along with Strickler's instructions, which were, in their entirety, "bring a camera." He impatiently reminds her that Strickler is his ticket "Back In." There's a knock on the door, and Michael looks at Fi, like, Are you going to get that, or what am I not paying you for?, and when she answers it, there stands Strickler himself, with white suit, a striped dress shirt, and a smug look. "Strickler -- Michael's Ticket Back In," remind the subtitles. Although if Strickler's outfit is any indication, it looks like Michael is going to be asked to infiltrate a vicious gang of ice cream truck drivers. Which he really shouldn't have a problem with, being a longtime yogurt sympathizer. "Always a pleasure," Strickler smarms at Fi. "The pleasure's all yours," she shoots back. Uh, Fi, which one of you has pointed a shotgun at the other one? Just asking. He and Michael leave, but before Michael follows Strickler out, she has a request: "If it doesn't feel right, promise me you'll walk away." He leaves, significantly failing to promise any such thing. Strickler tips her a cheeky little salute. She fails to shoot him in the spleen with a nine-volt.
It's raining as Strickler's silver Aston Martin pulls up by the side of the road on a bridge for some reason. Strickler reiterates the deal, where Michael does Strickler's bidding in exchange for help getting Back In, and Michael asks about said bidding. Strickler points out the car window at a warehouse, claiming it's a safe house used by an unnamed American intelligence agency to store equipment. "What if I told you I know the exact moment it's left unguarded?" Strickler boasts. Off Michael's dark look, Strickler assures him that he doesn't need Michael to rob the place. Because, as it turns out, that's already being done before our very eyes, as a crew of guys carries out some big wooden crates and loads them onto a boat waiting at the adjacent dock. "We should alert the owners," Michael says loudly and firmly while watching through his binoculars. Strickler says they'll do that when the time comes. He says he knows when the stuff is being sold, but not where or to whom. "The crew has a cleaner," Michael realizes. Strickler confirms that he'd be the key to tracking down the sale. As the boat laden with the stolen goods casts off and motors down the river, Michael VOs, "Heists are like parties. The worst part is cleaning up. Someone has to stay behind and get rid of all the evidence." That would be the guy Michael's watching through his binoculars, which suddenly feature a subtitle reading "The Cleaner." As the cleaner walks briskly away from the scene of the crime, the VO continues, "Of course, tidying up after a heist often involves methods not suitable for parties." Right on cue, the warehouse blows up, and of course the cleaner never looks back, because cool guys don't look at explosions. "Moment of truth, Michael," Strickler prompts, and Michael gets out of the car to get a photo of the cleaner's license plate. Truthfully.
It's still raining when Michael comes into Madeline's attic to see Sam packing for what looks like a trip. "Goin' out with Ms. Reynolds," Sam confirms. "Got new underwear and everything." Sam ruffles a small stack of fresh boxers, which we get a close-up of. I'm sure it's just a coincidence that we're also getting a close-up of the label of the same beer we just saw advertised in the commercial break. Sam gushes about a friend's villa that he's getting to borrow for the weekend. Michael asks Sam whether he was able to learn anything about the license plate he got, but before revealing what he knows, Sam expresses his own doubts about Michael working with Strickler. "He can help clear my name, I don't get to be choosy," Michael says. But apparently he gets to be pissy about it with his friends. Sam says the car was rented with a stolen credit card, but that same card has been used repeatedly to buy gas in a specific neighborhood, which points Sam to the Wages Motel (just as the name of the episode's Director of Photography, William Wages, A.S.C, pops up in the credits. Nice shout-out to the cinematographer). Sam knows Michael wants to get some surveillance going on the cleaner, but warns him that he won't exactly blend in with the bluehairs at the bingo parlor across the street. Sounds like a job for Madeline. But Sam warns Michael, "She's been a little out of sorts since the roof started leaking...for some crazy reason, she thinks it has to do with the time I blew up the house." Michael doesn't even hear that, because while helping Sam fold his laundry, he's discovered a fresh horror that he's now holding in his hands. ""Strictly need-to-know, Mike," Sam says, snatching away a skimpy pair of manties. Yeah, I don't think anybody needed to know that.
Michael joins Madeline down on the main floor, where bowls and buckets are scattered around. There are drips everywhere -- including Fi. Michael assures his mom that all she'll need to do is watch for the cleaner and stay inconspicuous. He also promises to fix the roof in exchange for her help with this. While she's off getting her purse, Fi gives Michael a hard time about dragging his mom into working with Strickler. He gets defensive and she lets it drop, just in time for Michael to get a cell phone call from a very desperate-sounding Barry, who says he's calling in all the favors Michael owes him. How many is that, exactly? Michael tries to demur, but Barry insists he meet him at the Carlito right away. "And bring Fiona, 'cause this could get a little... violent." Especially if Michael brings Fiona. Michael agrees to be right there, as water from his mom's leaky ceiling drips down his forehead. To his credit, Michael is very Iron Eyes Cody about this indignity.
Cut to the Carlito, where Barry worriedly informs Michael and Fi that his ledger has been stolen. What's that? "The list of my clients and all the accounts where I...protect their money," Barry explains. That sounds like something you'd have trouble being a money launderer without. Michael is surprised that Barry writes it all down in one place, and Barry says it's part of his shtick, to protect it from hackers and the IRS. But then he got a call this morning from someone, threatening to sell the ledger if he doesn't come up with five million dollars by Thursday. The thief couldn't just make withdrawals from Barry's clients' accounts using the information in the ledger itself? That sounds like a much more low-impact way to go. "If somebody starts blackmailing my clients..." Barry finishes, expecting his friends to step in and tell him to calm down. But they just politely watch his performance until he asks if he needs to beg. Fi's all for that, but Michael isn't. "Barry -- The Client," the subtitles say. He hasn't had a subtitle for a while, since way back when we had to be reminded every week that he was a money launderer.
So, on to the case. Barry says he keeps the ledger in a private storage space that he rented under an alias, Why does he not just carry the ledger around with him? Wouldn't it be kind of a pain to have to make a trip to the E-Z Han-D U-Stor-It every time he makes a transaction? He says there's nothing else in there but some cash and some paperwork belonging to "Amy." This would be Barry's new girlfriend, who Barry thinks is going to be pissed when she finds out her will and deed to her house were stolen. Like you and I, Michael and Fi seem to grok the connection between Barry having a new girlfriend and getting his ledger stolen in the same fiscal quarter. Michael explains to Barry what a "Trojan horse" is: "You put a tracker on a document, you give it to someone to hide..." "They follow the signal back to the hiding place," Fi finishes. Barry doesn't want to believe that his "special lady" could be part of this, but Fi assures him they'll sort it out. I believe a catfight was just foreshadowed.
At the bingo parlor, Madeline's wearing her "blending in" sunglasses, the ones that look like they were fashioned out of two Os in the Hollywood sign. Michael VOs, "Anyone trained in counter-surveillance knows that most field ops are between 22, when people finish training, and 55, when they retire. Which is why even wary operatives don't usually pay attention to kids or anyone on Social Security." Madeline's got a good view of the entrance to the Wages Motel, and a photo of the Cleaner tucked under her Bingo cards to consult whenever someone comes out. She's also got a Bluetooth on, which she uses to talk to Sam, who's parked outside in that inconspicuous, fire-engine-red classic Buick. He assures her she'll be fine; just call if she sees the target, and keep a low profile. Sam drives off, and she immediately calls bingo. I know that was supposed to be ironic, what with coming right after her agreeing to stay inconspicuous, but she would have attracted a lot more attention filling up cards and not saying anything.
Michael and Fi have driven Barry over to Amy's house in the back of the Charger, and he's still maintaining that she's visiting a sick aunt. Except when Michael comes back from the perimeter check he's just finished, he reports that the signs are that she's home. "I bought her that car," Barry says bitterly. Fi tells him to wait in the car. She and Michael go pick the lock on the back gate, and Fi notices they're not the first to have done so. Moments after they're in the yard, out comes none other than Debi Mazar, brandishing a golf club and her scary-ass eyes and telling them they're trespassing. "You must be Amy," Michael says, and the subtitles agree that this is indeed "Amy -- Barry's 'Special Lady.'" She swings the club at Fi, who both ducks the blow and decks her. Anybody here wondering what would be the outcome of an Anwar/Mazar cage match in real life? No, I think we're all pretty certain.
A short time later, Michael is explaining Amy's situation to her while Fi is examining her Range Rover. "You think people running a five million dollar extortion scheme are just going to let you walk away?" Michael asks her. "You're a loose end." In related news, Fi reports that Amy's car is ready to explode "like solid gasoline" the minute any weight is put on it. Amy doesn't believe it, so Fi picks up a brick and, despite Amy's protests, throws it through the driver's side window. Teach you to leave bricks lying around in the yard, Amy. The passenger compartment goes up in flames. Luckily it's one of those small detonations that Fi hates so much, because that fenced-in yard isn't big enough for any of them to get very far away. The sad thing is that a car that's rigged to explode the moment weight is put on it sounds like the perfect vehicle for Fi, as long as she doesn't take any passengers. Way to pass up a free car, Fi. Convinced, Amy spills everything: although she likes Barry, she agreed to screw him over for a hundred thousand dollars from someone whose name she can't remember. "He was some kind of foreign," she explains, adding that she met him at a house in Coconut Grove. "It's time to leave town, Amy," Fi says. Yeah, and it looks like she's going to have to take the bus.
Off to that house in Coconut Grove, presumably. Fi sits guard across the street while Michael and Sam go around the back and make their entry through a window. This is done using a drill, a bit of blue masking tape to keep the glass from shattering while Michael perforates it, and a bent wire hanger to stick through the resultant neat little hole and disengage the lock. Once inside, they get right to work tossing the place. "Searching a pre-furnished house is pretty straightforward," Michael VOs. "Without a lot of furniture or customized safes, there aren't many great hiding places. So once you've checked all the usual slicks, the spots pros would use, you're stuck calling it a day or ripping out the drywall." Since the search has failed to turn up Barry's ledger, they're left flummoxed in the living room, just as Fi notices a silver Jag pulling in out front. She calls Michael on his Bluetooth and tells him to get out. But Michael tells her and Sam, "We leave now, they'll know we were here. Barry's ledger disappears forever." Sam asks what that means, and Michael takes off his sunglasses and Bluetooth, saying, "We owe him, Sam." Sam draws his gun with a resigned sigh, while Fi more and more insistently tells Michael to get out. And she's not going in guns blazing because...?
Instead of leaving, Michael just stands in the living room, waiting for the man (played by someone I've never heard of or seen before) and the woman (played by Callie Thorne from Rescue Me) to walk in so he can say in a bad-guy whisper, "Welcome home. We need to talk." Yeah, the Eastwood voice isn't all that well thought-out, but I guess it's not bad for something he came up with on no notice. The woman freaks, and the man smacks her across the mouth to shut her up. "No way to treat a lady," Sam says, appearing behind them with his gun cocked. Big talk for a guy who owns manties. Michael asks where the ledger is, and instead of answering, the man with the Slavic accent grabs a pen and makes to attack Michael with it. Of course, Michael quickly disarms him and throws him through the glass coffee table. "See? I was afraid something like that was going to happen," Sam carps, as though it was his coffee table. Then he notices the woman weeping abjectly against the wall, and casually waves a hand at her to quiet down, seemingly unaware that it's the hand with the gun in it and thus not really helping. "Get some pillowcases," Michael Eastwoods. "We're gonna need head-bags." Sam: "Oh, goody." Pillowcases, though, that's kind of classy.
Michael and Sam report back to Barry at the Carlito after the break, telling him that although they didn't retrieve the ledger, they've got the thieves, and they'll just have to find out from them where the ledger is. Barry suggests some electrodes and a car battery, but Michael, whose position on torture hasn't changed in the past 20-odd episodes, maintains, "Torture just gets you the fastest lie to make the pain stop." Sam assures Barry they can handle the interrogation, "So don't worry your spiky little head." Barry asks them to hurry, since he has clients coming to town. Michael suggests avoiding clients for a while, which Barry balks at. "Dodge calls now or bullets later," Sam points out. Good enough for Barry. He heads out, presumably to get a head start on his dodging.
Sam cheerfully tells Michael he's on a schedule too; he wants to get this wrapped up before his little getaway with Ms. Reynolds. Michael's like, yeah, about that. He needs not only Sam's time, but his space. "How many days do you and Ms. Reynolds have that villa?" Sam tries to refuse, but Michael's hangdog look overrides his resistance. He may be in lust with Ms. Reynolds, but I think we all know who he really loves. "Sometimes it's hard being your friend," he sighs. Just keep thinking about those rich women in the brewery, Sam. By the time you and Michael get to them, there will be a lot of them.
Back at the loft, Michael shuts the man and the woman into the Buick's capacious trunk, and Sam drives off, not looking forward to cancelling with Ms. Reynolds. Never mind that, Sam; worry about the unholy mess your captives are liable to make in her mom's trunk. No sooner is he gone than Michael gets a call from his mom, who reports that she just spotted the cleaner and he should get over there before he takes off. "Great work, Mom," Michael tells her. "Don't forget my roof," she reminds him. Michael hangs up, and turns to Fi. Since he's going to have to help Sam with the interrogations, he winces as he asks her to tail the cleaner and see if he scouts a location for the deal Strickler wants him to photograph. "Thanks, Fi," Michael says to her retreating back. He's clearly not comfortable asking her to help him with a gig she doesn't even think he should have taken on, but I have to give Fi credit for not making him squirm over it. Wait -- is credit the right word?
That's a very nice villa Michael's co-opting from Sam, and Sam's having trouble getting over it. "I just didn't expect to be wearing pants here," he TMIs. What happened to need-to-know? Moving on, Sam leads Michael over to an open laptop to show him a double-screen surveillance feed, showing the woman unmasked and handcuffed to a four-poster bed in a guest room. They must not think she's very motivated to escape, because the bed column they've chained her to isn't much taller than she is; if she wanted, she could probably raise her hands up and get the handcuff chain over the top of the pole without even having to stand on the mattress. Meanwhile the guy has been subjected to even fewer restraints; while he's still wearing his headbag in a dungeon of a basement utility room, he's just standing there with his hands cuffed in front of him. So I guess these are encouraging signs that Michael and Sam have a couple of unusually cooperative captives on their hands. Sam reports that neither of them had any ID, but the woman's keychain has a photo of a doe-eyed toddler, which he shows to Michael. "Nothing like a personal memento to find a soft spot," Sam says. He'll take her while Michael takes the guy. "Because you know, Mike," Sam says, "I got a way with the ladies."
Cut to Sam demonstrating his "way," which in this case is loudly reading the newspaper comics in front of her. Ms. Reynolds never had a chance. After keeping her mouth shut at first, she asks what he wants, and he starts with two questions: her name, and where she's hiding the ledger. "Natalie. I'm a property manager, and I don't know anything about your ledger, okay?" Hey, lady, nobody asked what your job was. Sam asks about her partner, who she says is a monster. Sam's not impressed, so she gets all conciliatory and asks to be let go so she can get back to her son. Sam informs her she's not going anywhere until they get what they want, whether it's a day or a month. She looks up at him defiantly for a minute, then commences blubbering pathetically. "You're totally going to kill me, aren't you?" she wails.
It's not going much better for Michael in the basement. "Work in the field long enough, you recognize hard targets for interrogation. People who shut down at the first hint of confrontation." Even with a bag over their heads, you can recognize this, apparently. Michael removes the pillowcase and gives his prisoner a cigarette and a light. "Best way to get him talking? Avoid confrontation as long as possible." And hope he smokes. Michael opens the conversation by apologizing for earlier and saying they both want the same thing: for this to be over. He says he works for someone very private (and very scary, it goes without saying), who doesn't want their financial records released, and that Barry's already been killed over it. "You understand, Mr...?" "Washington. George Washington," the Slav says. Michael laughs heartily, and tells him that Natalie is going to crack, and then George's usefulness will come to an end. George says he met her three days ago, so she knows nothing about him anyway. Michael makes him an offer: tell him where the ledger is and he can go free. Or not, in which case, "its just a matter of time." Unfortunately, Michael seems to have oversold the "private, scary boss" angle, so George thinks that giving up the goods will get him killed, too. But, he informs Michael, he's got a backup plan: "If I don't show up for the sell, a friend posts it on internet." Okay, but good luck getting anyone to look at it, unless the same friend plans to also spend a week posting a shitload of spam on blog comments and Twitter. He says they each have a gun to the other's head. "Who shoots first?" "I'll get back to you on that one," Michael spits, smacking the cigarette out of George's hand and replacing the head bag. So much for avoiding confrontation. Although I guess it would have been even ruder to put the headbag on while the cigarette was in George's mouth.
Upstairs, Michael finds Sam in the living room, listening to Natalie's crying from down the hall. Michael reports that the man won't crack unless they find out more. Fi wanders in and comments, "Nice place." Sam gets up to begin another shift with Natalie, despite Michel's suggestion that they lay off for a bit. "She's a delicate flower, but lucky for us, I got a green thumb," Sam says. Fi reports to Michael that she tailed the cleaner to a park, and after watching him scope it out for an hour, she's sure that's where the deal is happening. Michael thanks her sincerely for her help, which only irritates her. "You have any idea who would pay Strickler for a job like this?" she wonders. Michael testily points out that he's just taking pictures, not killing anyone. "It's not like anyone ever got blackmailed or killed from just a few pictures, right?" Fi snarks. Indeed, I suspect that the person who will end up being blackmailed will be Michael himself. Someone's going to see these pictures and wonder why a guy who has taken down entire mafias and private armies didn't do anything to stop a small crew of thieves. Fi wonders who Strickler is getting Michael into bed with, like it would be worse than being in bed with Fi, but before he can answer, Sam returns, having apparently been repelled by a solid wall of Natalie's tears. Michael suggests a "softer" approach, and turns to Fi. She correctly assesses that if she's playing the "soft" one, things must be pretty desperate. I'd say she's nailed it.
Fi enters the guest bedroom carrying a tea service for two as Michael VOs, "There's a reason fear often fails as an interrogation technique. Most interrogation subjects are already scared. Scaring them more doesn't help. What they need is a friend." Or, failing that, Fi. Fi introduces herself to Natalie as "Kim" and sits down on the bed to talk to her. She asks Natalie how she got into this, if she's the innocent realtor she claims to be. Natalie tells a little sob story about her circumstances, leading into how she sometimes lets people use places "off the books." That's where George came in, but then he took her money and her passport and drafted her as his chauffeur. "He used me as his own personal real estate agent. And...for other things." Now she has Fi's sympathy, while Fi has a new angle: she suggests they take him down together. Natalie insists she doesn't know anything, but Fi gets her to tell her about a condo near the airport.
That night, Michael and Fi break into that condo and search it with their flashlights and guns pointing around, X-Files-style. They quickly find a safe, tucked into the fireplace behind the grate, which is the worst hiding spot ever. However, Michael observes its location with what sounds like annoyance over more than just a questionable decorating choice. "With its own ventilation system," Fi adds. "Time to go shopping," Michael sighs.
After completing their errand, they return with a lot of what looks like highly specialized equipment. Good thing there's a 24-hour safecracking store nearby. Michael uses a VO to explain the challenge at hand to us viewers: "Used in embassies to store secrets, burn safes depend on an internal ignition device to start a fire. Pump in liquid CO2, and if you do it right, you can turn that ignition device into a popsicle. Do it wrong, you turn everything inside the safe to a pile of ash." But when they get the door open, Michael gingerly working the lever like he expects it to literally blow up in his face, what they find inside is ice instead of fire. Well, that and a bunch of cash, along with a trio of passports. Not Barry's ledger, though, because it's still too early in the episode. The passports belong to Natalie, "George Washington" (who is actually Milovan Drago, which is a little disappointing) and a guy named Bennett Tash. They'll all be so glad their passports weren't incinerated.
Early the morning, Sam has his first talk with Milovan. "I'm Finley, and I'm told that you go by the name George Washington? ...Rolls off the tongue a lot easier than Milovan." Milovan asks for a cigarette, and Sam lights one for him, getting a bit too close as he does so, considering how slapdash Milovan's restraints are. Even if Sam does have a gun in his hand. After Sam steps back again to a safe distance, Milovan starts taunting Sam about his former life, because apparently he can tell Sam is ex-something just by looking at him. Must be the chin. Refusing to discuss himself, Sam says that Milovan must realize they got into his burn safe, and it's only a matter of time before they find Bennett Tash, who they've since figured out is the guy who's going to post the ledger on the web, as Milovan threatened. Milovan wishes him luck finding Tash, and realizes Sam was ex-military. "Soft now, washed-up, but I see it." Sam is trying to be reasonable, but Milovan continues to taunt him, asking if he was in the Coast Guard. "Try Navy SEAL, pal," Sam growls, getting in Milovan's face. Which is just what Milovan wants. He spits in Sam's eye, puts his cigarette out on him, and takes his gun from him as Sam goes sprawling. "How stupid can you be?" Milovan asks, Sam, which is an excellent question. Except that when he pulls the trigger, Nothing happens but a click. Sam pulls a fresh weapon out of an ankle holster and fires it into the wall behind Milovan. "Not stupid enough to put a loaded gun in your hand," Sam says as he gets up. "Have a seat, please," he says, shooting the floor near Milovan's foot. Milovan obeys, and Sam reclaims the empty gun. I think we've all learned something. And it's that Michael and Fi don't come running as quickly as you might think when they hear gunshots coming from the direction where Sam is alone with a suspect.
After an oddly timed ad break, Michael and Sam have apparently summoned Barry to the villa to report on their progress. The bad news: according to Milovan's passport, he's ex-Serbian intelligence, which means he's going to be hard to break until they find Tash. Which is Barry's job, so he heads out to get started on that. Michael tells Sam that he and Fi have to go meet Strickler, and pointedly asks if Sam will be okay alone with the captives. Sam just looks at him. "Okayyy," Michael says. Oh, Michael, don't let Coast Guard Boy intimidate you like that.
Fi leads Michael through a park, speculating that the goods will be transferred from a boat to a truck, via a driveway that leads to a dock on the canal. I know it sounds weird, but we have parks with docks all over in Minnesota, even if the only place for boat-driving thieves to offload stolen military equipment is on the other side of the lake. Fi has even picked out a spot where Michael can do his surveillance, while she sits over yonder, "sunbathing in a hat," but actually ready to back him up if need be. As a sunbather? What's she going to do, snap the bad guys with her thong? They meet Strickler, dressed once again like a soda jerk, and Fi has some questions for him. Like how he knew when the robbery was going to take place, or how he knew the thieves would sell it. Strickler says that's need-to-know, and it's bad form to ask. "Like it's bad form to just sit back and take photos while lowlifes waltz away with the stuff?" Fi asks. Michael asks her to back off, and she leaves entirely. Strickler says he hopes she'll be cool, since he's already made some promises to people. "I'll handle it," Michael says quietly, and follows Fi. Oh, good update. Strickler learned absolutely nothing. Nice work, Agent Softee.
At the villa, Fi has moved Natalie out to the veranda, although she's still handcuffed. Natalie starts to wonder if she'll ever get to see her son again, and Fi says she will, if she helps them. Just then, Fi's phone vibrates. On the other end is Barry, who has tracked Bennett Tash to somewhere in Overtown. With that new information, Fi asks Natalie if Milovan ever wanted to go to Overtown. Natalie is suddenly reluctant for her own sake to roll over on him, but Fi tells her to be brave. "Tell Jared you'll be home soon," she says, sliding her cell phone across the coffee table to her. Natalie says, "It's a storefront on Post Street," and dials Fi's phone. Fi watches as Natalie speaks emotionally into the phone. Don't forget to check "dialed calls" when she's done, Fi. I'm just saying.
Suddenly, apparently after Fi has relayed this information to them, Michael and Sam are approaching an abandoned locksmith's shop, discussing their strategy for dealing with Tash: "Milovan keeps his business compartmentalized," Michael reminds Sam. "Nobody knows each other. Let's use that." Sam recognizes "the old we're all in this together" and agrees to go along with it. They bang on the door, and when Tash, a ratty-looking younger guy, opens the door, they tell him the boss sent them and the whole operation's going south. Tash lets them in, saying nobody's checked in with him. He goes into the other room, ostensibly to get a drink. But as soon as he's out of sight, Michael VOs, "In any new situation when you're going in cold, you have to be alert to warning signs." There's a click from the other room. "The sound of a MAC-10's bolt action, for example." Under what circumstances would that be a good sound to hear? Michael and Sam look at each other and dive behind the counter, as the dividing wall and the whole place starts getting shot up. "A MAC-10 can fire fifty rounds in a few seconds," Michael VOs, "but it's one of the least accurate guns in the hands of an amateur." Michael signals Sam to return some covering fire, which Sam does just by sticking his gun hand over the counter, while Michael moves into a new position. "Survive the first burst, and you've got a decent chance," the VO concludes. Tash comes into the front room, and while he's reloading, Michel tackles him and Sam disarms him. "You know, you could use some time at the gun range, Bennett," Michael says. "Where's the ledger?" Tash just says he has instructions to shoot any visitors on sight, and begs them to kill him right now, because apparently he's just that scared of his boss. He doesn't even know where the ledger is. "The deal's set for five this afternoon," he says. "I'm just waiting on a call to see where." While Michael duct-tapes Tash to the wall, Sam says they know it's his job to upload the ledger, so he has to have it. Or at least a PDF. Tash denies it. "The only one who knows where that ledger is is her." Sam and Michael are pretty slow on the uptake, but after way too long, they realize that the boss behind this is actually Natalie. Milovan, Bennett says, is just a fall guy whose kids she threatened. "She's a killer." I'm trying to be surprised, but once again it's that common situation where a recognizable actor turns out to be the villain of the piece. Although I have to give major props for the misdirection with Debi Mazar earlier. But why, if Natalie was the bad guy all along, did she keep feeding the team clues that ended up panning out? Maybe we're supposed to assume that she figured they'd be thwarted by the fire safe, and when that didn't work, they'd be killed by Tash. Clearly she overestimated both. Anyway, while I'm processing all this, Sam and Michael realize they left Fi alone with her. "Tell her I'm dead!" Bennett yells at them as they rush out.
Back at the villa, Fi and Natalie are sitting there bored. Fi offers her something to eat, but she just shrugs. Meanwhile, Sam's driving the Buick at hazardous speeds through the streets to get back to Fi, while Michael tries to raise her on her cell phone. Lucky for Natalie, Fi's in the kitchen and doesn't hear her phone vibrating, but Natalie does. She ostensibly changes her mind about food, to mask the buzzing and also keep Fi in the kitchen a bit longer while she shuts the phone off entirely. When Fi returns with yogurt for both of them, Natalie asks her to take the cuffs off so she can pee. She's been holding it since yesterday, apparently. Fi goes to find the keys. Meanwhile, Sam's driving his girlfriend's mom's Buick like a madman (clearly he doesn't hate Fi that much) while Michael calls Barry to ask if he'sI heard from Fi, and to tell her if he does that Natalie's the boss. Back at the villa, Fi returns without the handcuff keys, as the Buick goes the wrong way down a one-way street. "I'll get something to pick the lock," Fi says when Natalie gives her a pleading look. Michael still can't get a hold of Fi. "That's bad, Mike," Sam says. "That's real bad." Helpful. Also, keep your eyes on the road, Lightning McQueen.
When we come back, Fi has the cuffs off of Natalie, inviting her to take a bathroom break. Meanwhile, Sam and Michael are returning to the grounds, guns drawn. "Like good poker players," Michael VOs, "spies know it's impossible to hide the tells that come with a bloodstream full of adrenalin." Taking in the situation from across the courtyard, Michael holsters his gun, VOing, "If showing fear or concern jeopardizes a mission, you replace it with an emotion that won't." So clearly the shot is to let Natalie think they're still not onto her, which is going to make this upcoming scene rather complicated. And it starts off with a bang, as Michael storms up to Fi and slaps her hard across the face, for real. Yikes, was that really necessary? I mean, I'm no fan of Fi, but I like guys who hit women a lot less. He acts angry at her for uncuffing Natalie to mask that adrenalin like he was just VOing about. He grabs Natalie and manhandles her back into the bedroom while Fi follows, screaming at him to leave Natalie alone. Sam tells Fi that Tash didn't have the ledger after all. "Poor bastard never even got the call from Milovan to set the location," he adds loudly. They shut Natalie in the room, and Michael immediately and urgently whispers to Fi, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Listen, she is the one selling the ledger. We are going to let her go, follow her, and grab it when she tries to make the sale." He keeps apologizing, but she angrily slaps his hands away. After a moment to pull herself together, she gets on board. She asks Michael, loudly enough for Natalie to hear through the door, what happened to Tash. Michael says Tash is dead, just like Tash asked them to. Sam adds that they have some cleaning to do, starting with Milovan in the bathroom. "Better drainage," Sam says. He also hands Fi the keys to the Buick to give to Natalie, whispering, "It's easy to tail." Is that the first time you've noticed that, Sam? The bit of theater continues as they pretend to give Fi orders to kill Natalie. "You're a goddamn piece of work," Fi whispers to Michael. I don't blame her for being pissed. Maybe when this is all over, Michael can go slap Barry for Fi and they can call it even.
Milovan gets the pillowcase pulled off his head to find himself kneeling in the bathtub, with duct tape over his mouth. Using an entirely too-loud voice, Sam explains to him, "I'm gonna pull the tape off, and you're gonna scream. And you're gonna keep screaming until we shoot. Now you make a noise after we shoot, we're going to have to shoot you for real, you understand?" Milovan does, and luckily for everyone involved, he's suddenly come over all cooperative. When Sam removes the tape, he starts begging, loudly enough for Natalie to hear from her room. She also hears Michael's cold-sounding speech, and a bunch of gunshots (which go into the tub surround, like Sam's buddy's going to love that). Sam oversells it, saying Milovan's leg is moving, and some more shots ensue. Meanwhile, Fi, keeping up the pretense of the sympathetic captor, enters Natalie's room, uncuffs her, and gives her the keys to the Buick. Then she picks up a big chair, and throws it through the giant window (clearly, Sam is never going to get to use this villa again) as Michael VOs, "Spies don't keep a lot of prisoners. When you hold someone, you only learn what they tell you. Let them go, and you can learn what they do and where they go." Still in character as the helpless hostage, Natalie thanks Fi for her help and flees.
The team runs out to the driveway in time to see Natalie peeling out in the Buick as Michael VOs, "Anyone with training can detect a tail from a single car." "We need new transportation," he says to his mates, looking back at the Charger and the Saab still in the driveway, "Let's go." The VO continues, "Pros watch for anyone who makes the same turns or runs too many yellow lights," as they split up to hotwire some cars. "To beat a pro, then, you need a team."
Part of that team turns out to be Barry, who is already in position, fiddling under the hood of his car by the side of the road. Natalie passes him in the Buick, apparently failing to recognize the rightful owner of the ledger she not only stole, but has been wearing handcuffs for the past day and night rather than give back. Michael's VO continues, "It's best to start a tail midway along your target's route, when they're sure no one's following. To do that, you need someone down the road to give you a heads-up." As apparently prearranged during the moments of panic when Sam and Michael were rushing back to the villa to save Fi's life, Barry calls Michael to tell him she went thataway.
A three-way pursuit ensues, with Michael in a red Cadillac, Fi in a gray Honda, and Sam in a dark-gray Mustang as Michael VOs, "Once you have eyes on the target, it's just a matter of handing off surveillance at regular intervals." And that's what they do. As Sam roars up behind Natalie, about as inconspicuously as a monster truck rally, Michael's VO adds, "Hang behind your target too long, and they'll wonder why you're not passing. The best way to avoid that suspicion is to pass them." Which Sam does, noisily, giving the rest of the team directions over his Bluetooth as to where he sees Natalie turning off in his mirror: South Pointe Park. How diabolically clever of her: fleeing to a spot with only one escape route back to the continental United States.
We catch up with Natalie sitting on a park bench, with Sam and Michael watching surreptitiously from a picnic table while Fi watches from the car she stole. They're all getting pretty bored with watching her sit there and do nothing until a guy on a dorky bicycle rides up for the third time. Without a word to each other, he and Natalie both drop keys on the ground and pick each other's up. Once the exchange is completed, Fi's the only one who can see that the cyclist is retrieving the ledger from a beach locker. "I'm going after the buyer. Take Natalie," Michael commands into his Bluetooth. Fi's all over it. With Sam following, gun in hand, Michael strolls casually up to the bike path, and when the biker pedals past, he sends him toppling with a hard shove, easily retrieving the ledger. "Property of Barry Burkowski" is written in the endpapers. I'm surprised that security measure didn't work better.
Meanwhile, Natalie closes a car's trunk on a duffel stuffed with money and turns to catch a faceful of Fi's fist. Fi draws a gun on her and tells her, "It's over, Natalie." Natalie says that's just a name on a passport. "Whatever your name is, you lose," Fi says. Which is when Natalie levels a gun of her own at Fi with a jaunty little "Boop." Seeing a field trip group approaching and hiding the gun behind her hip without lowering her aim, Natalie explains that she always has her buyers load the trunk with two things: "duffel full of cash, and a gun full of bullets." For situations just like this one, apparently. Stepping away from Fi, into the path of the field trip, Natalie also reveals that "Jared" is just a picture in a keychain. "Now, I know you're not the type to shoot into a crowd of little kids, but I am," she says, and starts walking away with them. "You're leaving without your cash?" Fi asks. Natalie just threatens to "drop one" if Fi moves. "See you around!" "Count on it"! Fi spits. Then she follows the group to a parked van Natalie just disappeared around, only to find her good and gone. Nice work, Fi. Although, if she decides to keep Natalie's money, this would be the team's most lucrative job in the history of ever.
Except she doesn't. When we catch up with Michael and Barry at Madeline's house, Barry's happy with how this all turned out: "So the cops find a car full of dirty cash and the people who wanted my ledger get shafted for five million? It's beautiful." Michael adds that Milovan is getting deported, as if anyone cares about that guy any more, and adds that Natalie is too smart to show up again. I don't know, Michael, Rescue Me tends to have pretty long hiatuses. Barry clears out all of Michael's markers, and Michael asks what Barry's going to tell those clients he's been hiding from. Barry says Madeline took care of that, as she arrives with a pair of open beers (not the new product-placed brand, but the red-labeled kind that Sam apparently abandoned in her fridge when he started taking money from a certain Milwaukee-based brewing company). "I've been purifying in an ashram," he grins. "No carbs, no e-mail, no phone." Michael's impressed, probably because Madeline not only came up with a cover story, but one that sounds like something Barry would actually do. Her usefulness is on the rise. Barry thanks her and takes off, adding, "Let me know how it goes with my roof repair guy." So that's that taken care of, as well. Instead of showing her guest out, Madeline sits with Michael at the table and asks how the cleaner thing turned out. Michael says he'll wrap it up with Fi tomorrow. Madeline hopes she'll learn more sometime. "But no need to go into it tonight." They clink their bottles, and Michael's so grateful that she isn't pushing for once that he looks like he might be about to sip some beer. Fortunately the scene ends before that happens, so nobody's brain will explode.
In the tag, Michael's at home fiddling with his camera when Fi comes in, looking serious. He wonders why she's not dressed for her cover (or lack of cover, as the case would have been), and she says she doesn't want him to work with Strickler so much that she isn't going to help him after all. Michael claims it's a two-person job, which Fi doesn't buy. She's more worried about the danger Michael will be in as a result of working with Strickler. "It changes you, little by little," she warns. Michael repeats his refrain: "He's the only one who can get me Back In. What do you want me to do?" Fi tells him to do what he has to. "I understand. I just can't stay here in Miami and watch." And then she walks out. Michael calls her name, but doesn't follow. And she doesn't come back. Okay, bye, Fi! Best of luck! Have a nice life!
Later, at the park, Michael sits with his camera on a picnic table as the motorboat from the heist at the beginning of the episode pulls up to the park dock. Even his voice-over sounds sad as it says, "There's no greater luxury in the field than working with a friend you rely on. When you find someone you can trust absolutely, you want them on every operation you do." Which doesn't really explain why he misses Fi, but there you go. Michael starts snapping pictures of the offloading of the crates, momentarily distracted by the sight of a woman arriving on the other side of the park in a sundress and a floppy hat the size of a radar antenna. He smiles over in that direction, thinking Fi changed her mind. "And nothing hurts worse than losing a friend to bullets, politics, or something personal." The woman looks up, and it's not Fi -- even she wouldn't wear a hat that dumb. Michael looks sad. "But when you have to work alone again, you lock those feelings away and do the job at hand." Michael gets some shots of the cleaner and his guys walking away with metal briefcases, and of the truck driving off with the goods inside. "Because as every spy knows, there's plenty of time to think about what you've lost after the mission is over." Especially when the mission is as cake as this one. Poor Michael: he does incredibly difficult jobs for nobodies for free, but the stuff the heavy hitters ask him to do is crap busywork that they could probably outsource to a temp agency. No wonder he wants back in, if this is the kind of milk runs he was used to as an actual spy.
Back at the loft, Strickler (now dressed more preppy than prep-worker) gushes over the quality of Michael's photographic work. Michael grumpily asks about the people who left with the stuff. "Gee, I don't know," Strickler lies. "I hope one day they're brought to justice." Michael asks who the photos were for, but Strickler isn't sharing that information either. Instead, his cell phone rings. "It's for you. Happy birthday," Strickler says, handing Michael the phone, apparently unaware that Michael's birthday is June 11. You'd think a guy like Strickler would have done his homework.
On the other end is Diego Garza. "Your favorite intelligence contact," he reminds Michael. Don't know why he's calling on Strickler's phone, but I guess Strickler's just that connected. Garza says he just got a call from D.C., notifying him of some "movement" on Michael's burn notice. What a gastrointestinal turn of phrase. Michael feigns ignorance as to how that could have happened. "I'll be in touch to set a meeting," Garza says before hanging up. Strickler gloats, "Is it me, or is someone on their way back to the promised land?" Michael doesn't answer, so Strickler takes the hint, saying, "We'll talk soon." Strickler leaves Michael with a pat on the shoulder and a smarmy, "This is just the beginning, Superstar." Michael just gazes out at the river. Don't tell us you're not going to miss that view, Michael. Okay, you won't, because obviously you're not actually going anywhere.
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M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter, or just e-mail him at M.Giant[at]gmail.com.