The Initiative

S04E07

Previously on Buffy, Parker and Buffy smooch and -- wait! Parker? Aw, crap. I thought we had gotten rid of him. Spike is shown with Harmony. Oh, no. No. I cannot handle another episode with both Parker and Harmony. Professor Walsh calls herself "the evil bitch-monster of death" (as if we forgot), and Spike is captured by our mysterious marauders.

Riley and his friend, Forrest, are sitting at a table in the dining hall. Riley is feverishly grading papers and Forrest is doing a little sightseeing while commenting that they need more "hotties" for the party they're throwing. Riley isn't really paying attention until Forrest asks him to check out a specific blonde girl. Riley turns to see Buffy getting a soda, and tells Forrest her name. Forrest asks Riley what he thinks of her and Riley replies, "I never really thought about what I think about her." Good thing Riley isn't majoring in English. And don't tell anyone, but I'm not surprised to learn that Riley doesn't think. He glances over at Buffy, who at this point is struggling with the frozen yogurt machine, the handle of which she inadvertently breaks off. Graham joins the dorkish duo at their table and Forrest points out Buffy to him, asking if he thinks she is "mattressable." This scene is really starting to tick me off. Oh, and shut up, Forrest. Forrest informs Graham that Riley doesn't like Buffy, but Riley interjects that he "doesn't dislike her," but "she never feels like she's really there when you talk to her." Considering all the conversations we've witnessed between Buffy and Riley, I can't blame Buffy for her drifting attention. Riley continues, "There's definitely something a little off about her." "Maybe she's Canadian," suggests Graham. Ba ha ha! That line was originally a joke to welcome a new Canadian writer to the team and was supposed to be edited out. The camera shows us Buffy again; she has given up on trying to fix the yogurt machine and is paying for her purchases. Riley admits that Buffy is "easy on the eyes," but he's not sure that anyone would really want to go out with her. Forrest disagrees as Buffy trips and drops her hard-won lunch. Where are they going with this insinuation that Buffy is clumsy? I'm not buying it for one second.

Now we have an overhead shot of Spike lying face-up on a white tile floor. You can really tell that Spike is not wearing any lipstick at all, his lips are incredibly pale. He stirs and mutters, "Slayer. I'll kill you." The camera pulls back as Spike regains consciousness, giving us an unobstructed view of the scads of eyeliner he's wearing. From this new perspective, we see that Spike is in a completely white room. He approaches what appears to be a window but is actually some sort of force field that shocks him. The camera continues to pull back, bringing a long row of identical white cells and doctors in white coats into focus as creepy sci-fi music twangs in the background.

By Sep

Credits. I notice that Spike has replaced Oz. That better not mean that Oz isn't coming back.

Hey, it's time for the belabored secondary plot line involving, you guessed it, Giles and Xander. They're hanging out at Giles's pad. Giles is on his couch, putting the finishing touches on his sketch of our mystery marauders. He holds it up for Xander to see, and it's not half bad. In my role as Giles's career counselor, I suggest getting a job as a sketch artist for the police. Xander comments, "The latest in fall fascism. I like it." Heh. Giles morosely says that they look human and therefore there isn't a need for any research. Xander suggest breaking out the Ouija board and conjuring up something to do. Enter Buffy, sans knock. Ahem. Manners? Giles suggests that Buffy patrol that night to be on the lookout for the commandos, but Buffy refuses. Giles protests, but Buffy says that she's taking Willow to a frat party tonight to cheer her up. Ugh. I can't think of anything more depressing than going to a frat party, especially when I'm broken-hearted. Xander asks how Willow is doing and Buffy replies, "She's dealing. I'm helping. It's hard. Ergo party." Buffy informs the odd couple that they can take the patrol. I slip Buffy an etiquette handbook with the section on "please and thank you" highlighted. Buffy excuses herself, saying that she has to go "find something slutty to wear." I'll give five bucks to anyone who can tell me what the point of this scene was.

Spike is pacing in his cell. He eyes the barrier feistily but thinks better of making another attempt. As we hear a mechanical beep, a tile in the ceiling opens and a bag of blood drops to the floor. Spike picks it up and is about to rip into it when a voice intones, "Don't. It's drugged." "Who is that?" Spike asks." Just a lab rat. Like the others." (Actually, it's the captured vamp from the season premiere.) The captured vamp goes on to explain that the men in white coats starve the vamps and then give them drugged blood to knock them out, and that's when the experiments start. Spike, inspecting the wall between their cells, casually asks, "And 'they' are? The government? Nazis? A major cosmetics company?" Random Reoccurring Vampire Character says that he doesn't know: "One minute I'm running from the slayer, I'm in here." At the mention of Buffy, Spike pounds the force field in frustration and says, "I always worried what would happen when that bitch got some funding." Ha! He continues with the idle threats, saying, "I'll take her apart. I don't care how brilliant she is."

By Sep

Her Brilliance is sitting in Psych class fiddling with her pen, which has leaked ink on her fingers. She wipes it onto her notes, smearing them in the process. Willow looks over and commiserates that "ball-points can be tricky." Professor Hardass dismisses the class and Willow approaches Riley to let him know that he left Oz's name off the roll call. As if they'd bother with roll call. Riley informs Willow that Daniel Osbourne (snerk) is not in the class anymore and that he heard that Oz had dropped out. Willow babbles on about Oz finding himself and she "assure[s] [him] that Oz will be back." Professor Hardass breaks in with a "not in my class," and proceeds to chew Willow up and spit her back out again. Hey, Evil Bitch-Monster of Death? I'm sorry, but Riley's nose is taking up too much room, so we don't have any left over for you to butt yours in. Oh, and shut up. A nearly tearful Willow runs out and Buffy turns to Professor Walsh: "You know, for someone who teaches human behavior, you might try showing some." Professor Walsh: "It's not my job to coddle my students." Buffy exits with, "You're right. A human being in pain has nothing to do with your job." Professor Walsh collects herself for a moment and then says, "I like her." I like Professor Walsh and her clipped delivery. Riley looks up from his desk and says, "Really? You don't think she's a little peculiar?"

Giles and Xander are readying weapons and materials in the Basement Of Debasement in preparation for that night's patrol. Giles remarks on the "impressive array" and asks how Xander acquired the collection. Xander explains that it's left over from when he was military guy. Giles comments that "was two years ago. Are you sure you're still a hundred percent?" Xander is struggling with some sort of gun (hey, I'm not military guy) and says that he "might not be able to assemble an M-16 blindfolded like [he] used to," as Giles takes the gun and easily opens the chamber. Xander dejectedly takes the gun back and says, "Might as well face it. Right now I don't have the technical skills to join the Swiss army." Heh. Giles reassures him, and Xander asserts that he's still up on his hand-to-hand combat skills. Ah, foreshadowing. Xander's mom calls downstairs that she's "made a nice fruit punch for [him] and [his] friend." Xander looks humiliated as Giles yells, "Is it, um, raspberry?" Okay, to exactly what lengths will the writers go to emasculate Xander? He already lives in a basement and can't load a gun. Now he drinks fruit punch?

Riley, Forrest, and Graham are all playing Frisbee in the lobby of their dorm or frat house. Riley is telling Forrest about Buffy's confrontation with Professor Hardass. Forrest admires Buffy's guts but Riley protests that Buffy is "nuts." Gee, it's nice to see that Riley considers Buffy's sticking up for Willow "nuts." I know I've mentioned Riley's hair before, but I really wish that he would invest in some clarifying shampoo. Suave has a good cheap product; I'm sure he could afford it. Parker descends the stairs and Forrest asks him for the scoop on Buffy. I'm not going to the trouble of recounting all of his comments here, but Parker is more than happy to slander Buffy. Riley looks more and more disturbed at each of Parker's comments. When Parker starts elaborating on the difference between freshman girls and toilet seats, Riley punches him. Too bad Buffy didn't get to have that cathartic moment herself, but at least she got to smack him around last week. Nice to see that Parker didn't learn his lesson. I know this scene was intended to make me like Riley more, and I'm ashamed to admit that it's working.

Riley and Co. walk through the campus, discussing Riley's violent tendencies. Riley can't understand what caused him to give Parker the WWF smack-down, because he's heard Forrest say cruder things about his own mother. Raise your hand if ew? And remind me not to invite Forrest to dinner. Romantic music swells as Riley "Forrest Gump" Finn says, "I think I -- well, I guess I like her." Forrest: "You're kind of like a moron." Sep: "'Like,' nothing." Riley is surprised to learn that everyone else knew he had a crush on Buffy, and Forrest says that calling her "peculiar" was a dead giveaway. Um. The last guy I went out with, even though I felt he was peculiar, attempted to walk across the country to visit me years after we broke up, so maybe Riley should listen to his gut. They ask him what he is going to do, and he says that he's "going to see about a girl." Y'know, Riley is like a box of chocolates -- sometimes he just makes me throw up. And since nobody else is speaking up here, I'd like to point out that it's extremely inappropriate for Riley to date Buffy since he's her TA. For someone who is conveyed as a real stand-up guy, you'd think he could wait a semester. ["You'd also think he could come up with his own lines instead of lifting them from Good Will Hunting." -- Sars]

Spike is passed out cold in the middle of his cell with an empty bag of blood near him. Two doctors roll up a padded gurney and use a pass card to open the cell. Thing One drags Spike on top of the gurney, but as he starts to fasten the restraints, Spike grabs his throat: "Sorry. Can't stay. Gotta go see about a girl." During the ambient choking sounds, we fade to commercial.

Xander and Giles are on patrol with Xander prattling on about "facing this moment," "waiting for an unseen enemy that has no face," and "never knowing which thought might be your last." Giles takes the words right out of my mouth with an exasperated, "Oh, shut up."

Buffy and Willow enter the party as upbeat music plays. Buffy notices some people as Willow goes to grab a soda. Good luck on getting a soda at a college party, Will. Willow sidles up to Riley to tell him that Buffy is wearing "the halter top with sensible shoes. That means mostly dancing, light contact but heavy conversation is out of the question." Willow dispatches Riley with a parting warning: "And remember, if you hurt her I will beat you to death with a shovel." Riley looks surprised, and I snicker as Willow explains, "A vague disclaimer is nobody's friend." She shoos him off with a friendly pat on the shoulder. This scene really made me realize that Riley has more chemistry with Willow than Buffy. Although since his personality has a pH of about 7, that's not saying much.

Riley approaches Buffy, and the others who were talking to her beat a hasty retreat before they get caught in Riley's web of boredom. Riley fumbles the conversational ball big time as he asks her if she's read chapter nine. He attempts a save by offering her cheese, but I bet Buffy's wishing she'd made a quicker exit. I'm distracted by the immense height difference between Buffy and Riley. Couldn't they have found a box for Buffy to stand on?

Xander is prowling through the woods alone because his company is way too annoying for even Giles, who as far as I can tell has a totally empty and meaningless existence this season. Xander comes across Harmony dousing a pile of Spike's stuff with gasoline. They both talk trash about each other and have the most ineffective fight I've ever seen on Buffy. Y'know, I was getting tired of everyone else's classically-trained karate-style technique, so it's very refreshing and amusing to see Harmony and Xander smack each other feebly and engage in some serious hair pulling. Plus, the use of slo-mo and the usual dramatic fight music really illustrate the absurdity of the situation. The fight ends in a standoff as Harmony, in her chief role of giving away Big Important Secret Information to the white hats, lets it slip that Spike is on his way to kill Buffy. I'm not even going to mention Xander's hair in this scene, except to say that the stylist on the set must have had her hands full with deep-conditioning Sarah Michelle Gellar's hair to get it unprehistoricized. It looks like she handed Nicholas her blessing, a brush, and a tin can for a mirror and sent him on his way.

Back at the party, Buffy is dancing as Willow and Riley hang out on the couch and talk about Riley's poor performance. Riley is engaging in some pretty heady self-delusion as he tells Willow that he's the type of guy who is good at things and gets the job done. I wish I had that type of misplaced confidence (as long as it didn't come with Riley's tuber nose and lank hair). As they are talking, a Dingoes song comes on; Riley notices that Willow is upset and actually endears himself to me somewhat by telling his friend to change the music. Then Willow tells Riley to go tell Buffy that, like, so-and-so has a total crush on her and, like, does Buffy maybe, like, like-like him back? Oh, I was regressing to junior high. Actually, she sends him with the message that she's going home, "which will at least give [him] something to say." Riley the dutiful errand boy relays the information, but is then interrupted by Xander collecting Buffy for "business." Riley endures some ribbing from Forrest and Graham, who then tell him that he's needed downstairs.

Riley, Forrest, and Graham walk around a corner in Lowell House and stand in front of a large mirror. Forrest taunts Riley, saying that Buffy most likely left to have "crazy naked sex" with Xander. As Riley protests the necessity of that statement (and I protest Forrest's spit-and-smooth eyebrow technique) and Forrest tells him that he's just looking out for him, a horizontal beam of green light scans over the three guys. The mirror slides back to reveal a stark white elevator. The guys enter, the mirror slides shut behind them, and the elevator descends while Riley and Forrest continue to banter about girls. Riley directs one of his comments into a box on the wall, from which a computerized voice declares, "Initiative vocal code match complete. Special Agent Finn, Riley." The guys exit the elevator and walk down a large industrial staircase as Riley says, "The problem is, what kind of girl is going to go out with a guy who's acting all Joe Regular by day and turns all demon-hunter by night?" Oh, the irony. I figured the writers would find a way to have Buffy's new beau be in her, um, line of work. "Maybe a peculiar one," suggests Graham, and the camera pulls way back to reveal an enormous underground bunker, very James Bond-ian, with people in white lab coats walking everywhere and a huge medical arena with a shiny aluminum floor, where scientists are studying a variety of demons and vampires strapped to gurneys. Dramatic Music of Great Set Expense ["And here I thought they just ripped if off from Star Wars" -- Ace] plays. Graham tells Riley that he thinks he has a shot with Buffy as the guys stride through the cavernous installation. "Situation?" asks Riley as they come to a stop, and we see that he is addressing Dr. Hardass, who is clad in a white lab coat. "Gentlemen, suit up. We have a Code Red," she barks. "Hostile 17 has escaped." Hostile 17? Hee hee. I think The Boy has a new nickname.

By Sep

Riley and crew sneak through a wooded area. They spy through some bushes, and Graham informs Riley that they've encountered a civilian. Shouldn't they be wearing their ski masks? Riley checks with binoculars, and we see Buffy sitting on a park bench waiting for Spike. Riley looks exasperated, and Forrest quips, "At least she's not making crazy naked sex." Riley says they need to get rid of Buffy, but Forrest suggests they use her to lure Hostile 17. "You wanna use the girl I got a crush on for bait?" asks Riley incredulously (and with rather bad grammar for an upperclassman). Forrest claims that he can take Hostile 17 out before he ever reaches Buffy, but Riley doesn't like the idea and refuses. Graham wants to know how they are going to get Buffy out of the area.

Cut to Buffy sitting on the park bench. She hears someone approaching, jumps up, and pulls out a stake, but quickly hides it behind her back when she realizes it's Riley. He has stripped out of his camo garb, down to just his t-shirt and jeans. She asks what he's doing, and he says he didn't get a chance to say goodbye to her at the party. He scans the area, and while his back is turned, Buffy stuffs the stake into her purse. Riley makes a point of mentioning that Buffy left the party with her "friend -- who's a boy." "Xander?!" Buffy asks. "He's not anyone that I," and she was obviously going to say "date," but lamely finishes, ". . . want to talk about right now." Buffy and Riley are both preoccupied with their agendas, darting glances around, and Buffy tells Riley that she "need[s] a little alone time now, alone." Riley demands to know why, and Buffy responds, "I need space." Riley, peremptorily: "We're outdoors." "Emotionally, I mean emotionally," says Buffy, looking confused and obviously wondering how to get rid of this doof. Riley suggests there's plenty of space in Buffy's dorm, and offers to walk her there. "You wouldn't believe the weirdos out at this hour," he jokes and reaches to take her arm. Buffy jumps back and declares that it's a free campus. She tells him she doesn't need help and that if he were a gentleman, he'd go away -- far, far away. She sits primly back down on the park bench and, not looking at him, gives him a brush-off hand gesture and says, "Shoo!" Riley seems to be losing his patience and asks Buffy if she's drunk. She agrees that she is and demands that he go report her. "I'm taking you home," snaps Riley and grabs her up off the park bench. Buffy shoves him away and asks, "What? You think that boys can take care of themselves and girls need help?" Riley: "Yeah." Buffy: "That is so Teutonic!" Riley says, "As long as you're out here I'm staying." Buffy: "Well, as long as you're out here I'm staying." Suddenly they hear a woman screaming, and shouting, "See ya!" they dart off in opposite directions. Riley rejoins the other commando dudes, who are tracking Hostile 17 with some sort of GPS unit thingy.

A shot from the ceiling in Buffy's and Willow's dorm room. Willow is lying glumly on her bed, listening to depressing music. She hears a polite knock on the door and says, "Come in." Spike slowly swings the door open and enters the room. "Spike!" exclaims Willow and jumps up from the bed. He approaches slowly as she demands to know what he wants. She's terrified and quickly offers to do a spell for him (referring to "Lover's Walk," an episode from last season in which Spike kidnapped Willow to perform a spell to help him get Drusilla back). Spike looks appraisingly around the room and Willow attempts to make a run for the door. He quickly grabs her and throws her across the room where she crashes into her night-stand. Ouch! "I'll give you a choice," Spike says insinuatingly, approaching Willow slowly. "Now, I'm going to kill you, no choice in that, but," and he moves to stand very, very close to her, "I can let you stay dead, or -- bring you back to be like me," and he morphs into his game face. "I -- I'll scream!" blurts Willow, who looks pretty damn scared. "Bonus!" says Spike and goes for her neck. Willow lets out a high-pitched scream and Spike grabs her by her face, turns the music up loudly on her boom box, and throws her down on the bed. As Willow struggles to get away, Spike flips her over onto her back and jumps astride her. She shouts, "No!" and flails at his chest with her fists but, still straddling her, Spike grabs her hands, holds them down, and goes for the bite on her neck. The camera moves out to the dorm hall, where we can hear the music playing in Willow's room and see the other residents unknowingly going about their business. Ugh. This was one of the more disturbing scenes on Buffy I've ever had to sit through.

By Sep

We see a dark office with papers strewn about on the floor. Spike is sitting at a computer terminal, viewing a screen titled "Stevenson Hall." As he scrolls down the screen, we first see Willow's name, then Buffy's. Spike smiles, leans back in the chair and says, "Hello, gorgeous." Y'know, considering how old Spike is, he's really mastered the new technology. I assume the office was wired with some sort of alarm, not to mention his apparent ease with computers (which is more than we can say for Giles).

Back in the world's largest dorm room, Spike is still sitting to Willow, his head in his hands. His inability to penetrate, so to speak, is still bothering him. Willow looks concerned and suggests they try again later; then, realizing she might have a chance to escape, she clocks him with a lamp and makes a run for the door. Outside in the hall, the lights go off, and Riley and crew enter the building wearing night-vision goggles. They run up the stairs, toting their big guns and scaring students as they approach Willow's room. One of them beats the door open with an ax, and as they prepare to enter, Spike throws Willow at them. It's very dark in the dorm and it's hard to make out the action. One of the commandos points his gun at Willow and another one, presumably Riley, tells him to hold his fire. Spike comes crashing out of the room into them. He attempts to bite one of the guys, but again recoils in pain. The commandos surround him and, although Spike is struggling wildly, they finally slip a bag over his head and tie his arms behind his back. As they prepare to leave, Forrest notices Willow cowering on the floor and suggests that she could have been vamped. As he and Riley argue about quarantining Willow, Spike breaks free, grabs a fire extinguisher, and bangs one of the commandos in the head. Riley fires at Spike, who holds the extinguisher in front of him, and it gets punctured, emitting clouds of fumes. A commando grabs Willow and yells, "She's contained," and we hear Buffy say, "Contain this!" as she fires the flare gun. The flare ricochets around the hall way, lighting it up for a brief instant and shooting sparks. Cool effect. Buffy kicks down one of the commandos, pushes Willow into their dorm room, and closes the door. Chaos reigns in the hallway as the three commandos, Buffy, and Spike all attempt to figure out what's going on. Buffy begins to fight Riley as Spike sees his chance to escape and runs down the hall, leaping out through the window at the end. Buffy has just flipped Riley onto his back when he calls to abort the mission so he doesn't get his ass kicked, and the commandos flee the building. As Buffy runs to check on Willow, the lights and fire sprinklers come on.

We're back in the Initiative's big-ass installation as Dr. Hardass vents her displeasure at Riley's performance. She expresses disbelief that somehow Hostile 17 has found a smart, aggressive accomplice who "defies description." Forrest and Graham attempt to defend themselves by saying that the accomplice was big and strong. Dr. Hardass continues to storm about and asks if the guys have any good news about "the implant." Riley confirms that the implant works and that "Hostile 17 can't harm any living creature, in any way, without intense neurological pain. Can't feed, can't hardly even hit anymore." Well, maybe not with fists, but it sure looked to me that he was capable of being a Big Nuisance. Riley insists that he'll bag Hostile 17, and Dr. Hardass dismisses the troops.

The day, Riley walks across campus in the sunlight and spots Buffy crossing a grassy area. He runs up to her and apologizes for his strange behavior the night before. Buffy apologizes too and says that sometimes it's just nice to be out alone at night. Riley agrees, but says, "Gotta be careful though. A lotta strange -- people out there." As they continue to walk, Riley asks after Willow, and Buffy says she's okay, but "that stupid fraternity prank on our dorm didn't help any." Riley then recalls that Willow and Buffy live in Stevenson Hall, and when Buffy is surprised that Riley knew that, he says he was talking to Willow about helping him with a "project." Buffy smiles at him and reminds him that he had wanted to tell her something at the party the night before. "Oh yeah," says Riley, self-deprecatingly, "very important stuff. I don't remember any of it now, but you would have been fascinated. Possibly even moved." Buffy just looks at him, and he says nervously, "Did Willow tell you I like cheese?" Buffy looks perplexed and then calls him peculiar. Riley, recalling that's the way he described Buffy, says he can live with that. They continue to walk across campus together. Am I supposed to like Riley better now that it's revealed that he is a Man With a Secret? I'll get back to you.

By Sep

Riley and his boys are lurking in the bushes and scanning Stevenson Hall with some sort of infra-red type device. Through the windows of the dorm, they sense a few 98.6-degree humans, and then a figure that is room temperature, indicating it is a vampire. The science behind this device seems a little doubtful, but we're suspending disbelief here. They pull on their ski masks and prepare to enter the dorm.

By Sep