Okay, folks. Here it is. The one you've all been waiting for. No episode I've recapped so far has had as much discussion in the forums as this one. And I haven't watched it in quite some time, so I'm really not at all sure what I'm going to say. But I can't put it off any longer. Here we go.
Previouslys. Blah blah blah true-happiness-equals-loss-of-soul-cakes. Angel kills Miss Calendar. Sniff.
We open in days of yore, at night in a busy village. The caption reads, "Dublin, 1838." Wow. So that means Angel, who was sired in 1753, according to "Becoming Part One," has been haunting Ireland for almost a century. I would have thought everyone would have fled his hair a long time ago. We focus on a young man who appears distressed. He must have seen the shooting script. He hurries through the street, which is covered in fake-looking snow, and keeps looking back as though something is following him. The score, however, is not dramatic or scary, but melancholy. Dial down the string section, people. The man bumps into a few people in his haste, then is grabbed by a pair of hands and thrown into an alley. We see that the grabber is Angelus. Oh, Lord. He's vamped out, but is sporting a mustache. That just looks plain silly. And he's speaking in his "Irish accent," of course. Ace, Sep, and numerous posters have shredded David Boreanaz's "Irish accent," so I'm saved the trouble of doing it here. I'll reserve my commentary for the hair. Did you ever see that Simpsons Halloween special where Snake died and Homer got his hair? It sort of looks like that, like someone scalped someone else and put the whole mess on top of Angelus's head. Only Snake's hair gave the wearer an actual personality. With the traditional attire, the hair, the mustache, and the accent, Angelus is about as intimidating as a Teletubby. Angelus greets his victim with, "Daniel, where are you going?" Let me guess. Away from your sorry ass? Daniel, cringing in fear, gets the chess-club-brain prize of the week, saying that Angelus is "not human." I just can't get over the hair, in more ways than one. He'd look better with a raccoon on his head. Daniel asks what Angelus wants, and Angelus duhs that he's hungry. He does so without even trying for the Irish accent, which is a huge improvement. He says that Daniel owes him money from cards. I find it hard to believe that Angelus would bother with the gambling thing to choose his victims. Not when there are second-sighted virgins to drive insane. Angelus grabs Daniel and says, "I'll take me winnings me own way." With the "accent." Sigh. Daniel panickedly recites the Lord's prayer. I would have done that as soon as I saw the hair, dude. Angelus tells him to cheer up, as it's Christmas, and bites him. Now, be sure and remember that it's Christmas, because there definitely won't be any more references to it in the rest of the episode.
Angel wakes up, shirtless and panting (?), in the mansion. Strega wakes up screaming.
Cut to Sunnydale's main drag. A weatherman on a TV in a shop window says that the temperature will be in the high seventies all weekend. Angel agitatedly walks by, and runs into Buffy, whose arms are full of Christmas gifts. Okay, what's with her hair? I can't really even describe it. Suffice it to say that no girl over the age of six should wear her hair like that. Buffy looks pleased to see him, and tries to make small talk. Angel says he couldn't sleep. They chat awkwardly for a bit until Buffy says she should finish her shopping. Angel isn't hearing her, however, as he's noticed that Daniel is standing in the street. The string music -- which I'll call The Victim's Viola -- starts up again, and I'm tired of it already. Buffy notices Angel's expression and turns, but Daniel's disappeared. Buffy asks what's wrong. Angel looks gobsmacked. Credits.
I'm doing this recap from DVD, so no old commercials. Sorry!
School. There's a wreath on a classroom door. Wow, is it Christmas? Buffy, Willow, and Xander walk out of a class. Buffy's filling them in on her encounter with Angel. She's worried about how weird he was acting. Yeah, I seem to recall that he changed facial expressions. Willow suggests that she mention it to Giles, but Buffy thinks that Angel is still a touchy subject for Giles. Xander: "Oh, it must be that whole 'Angel killed his girlfriend and tortured him' thing. Yeah, Giles is pretty petty when it comes to stuff like that." No, Xander, I'm pretty sure the petty one is you. Also, shut up. Buffy doesn't smack him, but simply tells him to chill. Willow speculates that Angel might have the holiday blues, and with a fairly subtle facial expression manages to convey how much she misses Oz. Buffy says that she's frustrated at her chance meeting with Angel, since she'd been avoiding contact with him. She says, "I just want a nice, quiet Christmas vacation." That'll happen. And -- "quiet." Good idea. Maybe I'll watch "Hush" instead of this crap.
The camera follows the gang to another room. There's a tree in the foreground. Do you think it might be Christmas? Xander asks Buffy what she's doing for Christmas, and she says she's spending it with Joyce. Buffy in turn asks Willow her plans. Willow reminds her that she's Jewish, and snarks that "not everyone worships Santa." Heh. They approach the lounge, and Xander sees Cordelia sitting on a padded bench. Willow laments that she and Oz had holiday plans. Xander volunteers that he'll be spending Christmas Eve in a sleeping bag outside, for his "annual Christmas Eve camp-out." Cordy rises and approaches them. Xander looks like he's bracing himself to get hit by a tidal wave. He nervously goes on that he likes the "nature vibe," but Cordy cuts in, "I thought you slept outside to avoid your family's drunken Christmas fights." Ouch. Xander is chagrined at that overshare. Cordy says that she'll be skiing in Aspen, "with actual snow." Buffy holds her off: "I hear that helps." Cordy muses that it'll be a drag for them stuck in "Sweatydale." Yeah, the high seventies are torture. She finishes, "But I'm thinking of you." She pauses. "Okay, I'm done." She leaves. Hee. Way less snarky than I expected, though. Buffy sniffs that Cordy's "reverted to form," but Willow defends her, and Xander says that Willow's got the Christmas spirit. Willow: "Hello, still Jewish! Chanukah spirit, I believe that was!" Okay, we get it. Shades of "gay now." Sheesh. Willow explains that forgiveness is a big thing with her this year. As she's talking, we see Buffy's face go rigid. Willow looks up, and it's Oz. Whee! Xander shifts uncomfortably. Oz greets Willow: "Hey." Instead of swooning on the spot, Willow manages a "hey" back.
Cut to Willow and Oz in an empty classroom. Oz starts, "Okay, the thing is...seeing you with Xander, it was...well, I never felt that way before, when there wasn't a full moon. But I know you guys have a history." Willow tells him that it's over with Xander. Oz says he's not sure it ever will be, but continues, "This is what I do know. I miss you. Like, every second. I mean, it's like I lost an arm, or worse, a torso." Aw. Only Oz could pull off that line. He goes on, "So I think I'd be willing to give it a shot." Willow gets out, "Really?" Oz: "Yeah." Willow: "Do you want us to -- to hug now?" Oz: "Yeah, I'd be up for that." They embrace tenderly. It's lovely. These two were great together. Then again, I'd probably say that about Oz and a large cactus.
Joyce and Buffy are tree shopping. Joyce suggests that they invite Faith over for Christmas Eve dinner. Buffy says that she and Faith are on the outs, but Joyce guilts her into saying that she'll ask her. Buffy wonders if they should invite Giles, but Joyce too-quickly nixes that idea. She then suggests that they split up, and runs off. Hee. Buffy resumes her search for the perfect tree, but dissonant music clues us in that she might find something else. She comes up on a group of very brown, dead trees. A middle-aged man pops up out of nowhere, and explains that "a bunch of them up and died on us. Don't know why." Thanks. The Exposition Fairy's gonna be pissed about that half-assed job when she gets back from her Christmas vacation. Joyce, off-screen, calls to Buffy that she's found the perfect tree. Buffy goes to see it.
Cut to a bunch of men in cleric's robes, performing a ritual complete with bones, candles, and chanting. We get a good look at one of them, and he's got big Xs where his eyes should be. Maybe he saw the shooting script as well. Or maybe it's in preparation for the shot, where a panting, shirtless Angel wakes up again.
Motel. Faith is banging on her TV, trying to get it to work. I'll be doing that at the end of this episode, except that my TV's working fine. She calls, "Yeah?" and Buffy enters. They greet each other rather nicely. Faith wonders if Buffy's there on slaying business, but Buffy invites her to dinner. Faith: "Your mom sent you down, huh?" God, I love her. Buffy lies that it was her idea. Faith sincerely thanks her, but says she's already supposed to go to a party. Buffy says that if Faith changes her mind, the invitation will be good. Faith mentions the party again, but much less convincingly. Buffy notices Faith's Christmas lights, and says she likes them. Faith, with a touch of bitterness: "Yeah, well, 'tis the season. Whatever that means."
Giles is cooking something when there's a knock on his door. He opens it, and looks floored. It's Angel, who says he's sorry to bother Giles. Giles laughs in his face. "Sorry, coming from you that phrase strikes me as rather funny. 'Sorry to bother me.'" Angel says he needs Giles's help. Giles: "And the funny keeps on coming." Sure does. Snarky Giles is comedy gold. Angel says he has no right to ask Giles for help, but he doesn't know where else to turn. Giles agrees, and walks off-screen. Angel says he can't come in unless Giles invites him. Giles, reappearing, says, "I'm aware of that," as he casually points a crossbow at Angel and invites him in. Angel explains that he's been having dreams about his past, like he's reliving it, and says he needs to know why he's back on earth. Maybe because you bored them to death in hell? "I should be in a demon dimension suffering an eternity of torture." You want me to say it, don't you? Okay, then -- say hi to Marti Noxon for me! Giles, like me, can't ignore this beach ball: "I don't feel particularly inclined to argue with that." No wussy Christmas spirit for Ripper! Giles asks if knowing why he's back would give Angel peace of mind. Angel: "It might." Giles: "I don't think that's something you ought to have." He moves to put the crossbow away, and we see Miss Calendar standing behind him. Angel looks scared. Giles goes on, "Because, sir, to be blunt, the last time you became complacent about your existence, it turned out rather badly." Angel continues to stare at Miss Calendar. Giles notices him gawping and looks around, but it's evident that he can't see her. Angel stammers, "Don't you see her?" Giles doesn't know what he's talking about. Angel runs out. Giles looks perplexed.
Shirtless Angel again, tossing and turning. Cut to a posh nineteenth-century party. Under the staircase, Angelus has a female servant cornered. Oh. My. God. His hair looks much worse than in the earlier scene. How can I describe it? I can't, but I can draw a comparison. One Halloween, Sars and I went to a party as Siegfried and Roy. I was the former. I bought a cheap wig called "Southern Belle." It looked sort of like a barrister's wig, but blonde. I combed out the curls, pulling out large amounts of the hair in the process. By the time I was through with it, it looked like something you might have found in Liberace's trash can. However, it still looked much, much better than Angelus's hair. Hee. Sars, is that too embarrassing a story to put in a recap (and remember, I haven't said a word yet about what you were wearing)? ["Embarrassing to whom? If you'll recall, the wig I bought was used to simulate chest hair, so don't worry about it." -- Sars] The girl wants to get back to her job, saying she'll be put out on the street. Angelus actually makes a hilarious fake sympathetic face. The cat plays with the mouse a bit more, then vamps out and feeds. Um, wasn't Angelus, like, scary at one point? After the girl falls to the floor, Angelus looks up, suddenly terrified. He sees Buffy in the middle of the room, staring at him. Angel and Buffy both wake up. Buffy looks wigged.
Angel pulls on a shirt, and sees Miss Calendar across the main room of the mansion. "Trouble sleeping?" she asks. Did anyone involved with this episode not have trouble sleeping? Angel tells her that she's not real, and to leave him alone. She replies, "I can't. You won't let me." He asks what she wants. "I want to die in bed surrounded by fat grandchildren, but I guess that's off the menu." "Fat grandchildren"? "Menu"? Who are you, the wolf from Little Red Riding Hood? Angel says he's sorry for killing her, but she says he should feel sorry for himself. "Oh, but I guess you've already got that covered." Get out of my head, woman! He says he doesn't know what else to say to her. She reaches out to touch his face. "I don't want to make you feel bad" -- she morphs into Daniel -- "I just want to show you who you are."
Buffy, still sporting the hairdo one should only wear with a dirndl, explains to Giles that she was in Angel's dream. He's skeptical at first, but then admits that Angel came to see him. Buffy wonders if they could find out why he's back, and Giles says he's been looking. Buffy says she'll help. At Giles's stern look, she says it's in aid of putting Angel behind her. Xander pops up, and says he'll help too. He admits that he's been a jerk about Angel. "I don't know, maybe I finally got the Chanukah spirit." Look at that -- Xander got an "aw" from me. Buffy looks grateful, and Giles says that they'll start with research, of course. Buffy asks if this is really how Xander wants to spend his holiday, and he admits that he's got nothing else to do. He laments that no one else has as pathetic a social life as he does. On cue, Willow walks up: "Hi, guys. What are we doing?" That was cheap. Oh, and: Ha!
The gang researches and eats pizza. Time passes. Buffy and Willow chat. Willow says that Oz is coming over on Christmas Eve because her parents are out of town. She says that she doesn't know how to make Oz trust her. I know -- a trust spell! Oh, wait, I'm getting ahead of myself. Buffy says that Xander has a part of Willow that Oz just can't touch. I hope that was metaphorical. Buffy suggests that Willow let Oz know he comes first. There's a dirty joke in there somewhere, but I'm going to let it go. Willow thanks Buffy for the advice, and they turn back to the research. Buffy complains that they're not getting anywhere.
Mansion. Angel falls to the floor in pain. Oh, wait, that was boredom. And also, that was me. Some middle-aged guy is droning on about how Angel killed his kids. Dude, you're no Keith Szarabajka, so don't even try it. He morphs into the servant girl, who gets to the point: Angelus is different from other predators because of the enjoyment he gets from torturing and killing his victims. In quick succession, Angel now gets it from all sides: Servant girl, flash to Daniel, flash to Miss Calendar. Angel tries to say that he was once a man, not a demon, and that's who he is now. Miss Calendar pisses on that idea, reminding him of the type of man he was. Cut to Angel in a bar, watching a girl dance on a table, as he drinks and jaunty music plays. He passes out and falls to the ground. That scene only lasted for four seconds, but it was way funnier than all but one other scene in this episode. Servant girl: "You were a worthless being long before you were ever a monster." Angel, crying and shaking, begs her to stop. It's Miss Calendar again, telling him that she just wants to show him that "cruelty is the only thing you ever had a talent for." He denies that, and so do I. I mean, it's a toss-up between him and Tom Welling for Champion Moper of the world. Mmm, Tom Welling. I'd like to take him to Club Zero. Recap? Right. Miss Calendar tells Angel to rest, and he goes fetal. She tells him that being cruel is his destiny. "I'll show you," she says, running her fingers through his hair.
Library. Xander yawns, and Willow sleeps. Giles gets breakthrough face. Buffy lies in the stacks, asleep. Flash to her dream. She lies in bed. Angel sits on the edge. They embrace, and then kiss. Soon they're naked, and going at it. Buffy writhes in the stacks. Gross. The tattoo's getting a workout. They keep at it until Dream Buffy sees one of the no-eyed guys in her bedroom. Dream Angel vamps out and bites her. They both wake up. Miss Calendar is at Angel's side, gloating. She tells him to "take" Buffy, saying that that's why "[they] brought [him] back. Take her -- and then you'll be ready to kill her." Ruh-roh!
As Buffy comes down the stairs from the stacks, Giles tells her he's found references to an ancient power known as "The First Evil." He describes it as absolute evil, older than man or demon, and says that it would have had the power to bring Angel back from the demon dimension. Buffy looks at one of the drawings Giles has laid out on the table, recognizes the no-eyed guys, and tells Giles that she saw one of them in her dream. Giles eagerly asks what happened in the dream. Buffy stares at him for a moment before responding, "We don't need to get sidetracked." Hee. She asks who the no-eyed guys are, and he says they're called the "Bringers" or "Harbingers." I like "Bringers" better. Remember Not Another Teen Movie? "You better bring it." "Oh, it's already been broughten!" Giles says they're high priests of The First, and they can conjure "spirit manifestations" and set them on people to haunt them. Buffy wants to stop The First, but Giles cautions her that it's not a physical being. She resolves at least to fight the priests, but Xander points out that they don't know where to look for them. Buffy stares at him.
Cut to Willy's bar. Yay! I love Willy. He sees Buffy and Xander enter, and too-loudly announces, "Hey, it's the Slayer! What brings the Slayer down here?" Two vamps slink out. Hee. Buffy and Willy greet each other, and he asks if they'd like a drink. Xander: "Yeah, let me get a double shot of" -- he notices Buffy staring at him -- "of information, pal." Okay, heh. Buffy asks about the Bringers, and Willy says the name doesn't ring a bell. Xander: "How 'bout I ring that bell for you?" Aside to Buffy: "Does the threatening come now?" Buffy: "Maybe you shouldn't help." Again, heh. Buffy presses Willy, and he gives up that a lot of underground-dwelling baddies have skipped town in fear recently, but that's all he knows. Buffy and Xander accept that, and turn to go. Willy calls after Xander: "You did great, by the way. I was very intimidated by you." Xander: "Really?" Willy nods hilariously. Xander: "Thanks!" That exchange was cute, but it just makes me wonder why the writers feel that they have to portray Xander as bumbling in order to make him sympathetic. Willy wishes Buffy a Merry Christmas. Wait, what is he talking about? They leave.
Buffy and Xander regroup outside. Xander complains about how hot it is. I've seen no evidence of that, by the way. People are dressing like it's forty degrees out. Buffy's upset that they haven't found any useful leads. Xander reassures her that they'll get the bad guys. Buffy looks calmer.
Oz walks into Willow's house. He calls, "I got videos," but stops dead when he walks into the living room. Willow's sitting on the couch, wearing a slinky red dress, the room complete with romantic lighting. She looks great. Oz looks blown away. Willow invites him to sit down, and as he does, Barry White's "Can't Get Enough Of Your Love" starts up. Hope those videos are from the adult section! Willow smiles eagerly at him. I love this scene so much, I have to transcribe at least part of it:
Oz: You ever have that dream where you're in a play, and it's the middle of the play and you don't know your lines, and you kind of don't know the plot?
Willow: Well, we're alone, and we're together. I just wanted it to be special.
Oz: How special are we talking?
Willow: Well, you know, we're alone, and we're both mature young people, and, and so...we could...I'm ready to...with you. We could do that thing.
(Oz stares. Willow smiles goofily. Oz stands up.)
Willow: Where're you going?
Oz: No, I'm not going, just a dramatic gesture. That's pretty special.
(Willow stands.)
Willow: Oz, I want to be with you -- first.
Oz: I think we should sit down again.
Hee! And, aw. They're just so cute! Where did it all go wrong? Don't answer that. She tells him she's ready, and he looks pained. "Okay, well, don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not." Willow says she thought he'd had sex before, and he acknowledges that that's the case, but says that this is different. He tells her she looks great, and that Barry's working for her (of course -- who doesn't he work for? Just hearing this song makes me...you know, that thought in no way needs to be finished) but that "when it happens, I want it to be because we both need it to, for the same reason. You don't have to prove anything to me." Can I get an "aw squared"? Willow tells him she just wanted him to know, and he smiles and says he gets the message. They mack. Awesome scene, awesome acting.
Summers home. Joyce tends the fire, and Buffy snits about the heat. Joyce: "So, angel's on top again?" Buffy looks up, startled, to see her mom holding a star and an angel. Oh, she was talking about the ornament, not Angel! Wow, was that clever! And by the way, is it Christmas or something? Buffy predictably picks the star. The doorbell rings, and Buffy and Joyce exchange a "who the hell could that be?" look. Buffy opens the door to find Faith. She's wearing a jacket, which kind of contradicts the whole "blistering heat" idea. Still, she looks great, as usual. Without saying as much, she conveys that there is no party, and that she didn't have anywhere to go. Buffy graciously says she's glad Faith came. Faith hands Buffy gifts, self-deprecatingly saying that they're "pretty crappy." Joyce warmly greets Faith, and thanks her for the gift. Faith nervously repeats that they're crappy. In a moment I don't know if they had scripted, Joyce nods knowingly. It's hysterical. Buffy says she'll get Faith's gifts.
Buffy walks into her room, but the door shuts behind her to reveal a very out-of-sorts-looking Angel. He's kind of incoherent, and acts like he's on something. The camera focuses on Buffy's neck. Miss Calendar appears behind Buffy, exhorting Angel to "touch her," to "taste her." Buffy tries to tell him that something is manipulating him, and that she knows he's confused. Angel, seemingly slipping, tells her she's the one that's confused. He moves forward. Miss Calendar tells him to go for it, and says that if he does, he'll never have to see "us" again. Is that the royal "us"? Buffy asks how she can help, and Angel snaps and screams, "Leave me alone!" and dives out the window. Unlike the earlier scenes with Angelus, this one actually managed to be scary.
Buffy asks Faith to stay with Joyce. She agrees, but doesn't understand. Buffy promises to explain later. Faith tells her to watch her back.
Buffy tells Giles that they have to do something, but she's not sure what. Giles subtly conveys that he's still a little torn about helping Angel; he warns Buffy that she may have to kill him again, "if he truly becomes a danger. Can you do that?"
Ironic Segue Fairy cut to Angel. "I can't do it!" Miss Calendar tells him he has no choice. He says he won't hurt Buffy. She snaps, "You were born to hurt her. Have you learned nothing?" She does have some evidence to back up that claim, I'll give her that. She continues, "As long as you are alive --" He cuts her off: "Then I'll die." Miss Calendar looks taken aback, and tells him he doesn't have the balls, but he says that all he needs is for the sun to rise. She calls after him that him dying isn't the plan, but when he's gone, she says in a satisfied voice, "But it'll do."
Buffy and Giles research some more. He finds a passage about the priests being harbingers of death. Buffy focuses on one sentence: "'Nothing shall grow, above or below.'" A cartoon light bulb appears over Buffy's head and lights up.
Buffy kicks open the gate to the Christmas tree lot as the music of an imminent ass-kicking plays. She finds the spot with the dead trees, and grabs a convenient pickaxe, then hacks at the ground, making a hole, and jumps down through it. She discovers the priests, doin' the ritual thing. "All right, ten more minutes of chanting and then you guys have to go to bed." Hee. She makes short work of the priests, and clears away the bones and candles. Miss Calendar appears, and says she's impressed. Buffy says she won't get Angel, but Miss Calendar says that Buffy can't fight her. "I'm not a demon, little girl. I am something you can't even conceive. The First Evil." So why didn't they cast Marti Noxon in this role? Oh, come on, you knew I was gonna say it. She goes on, "Beyond sin, beyond death. I am the thing the darkness fears. You'll never see me but I am everywhere. Every being, every thought, every drop of hate..." Buffy's bored by now: "All right, I get it, you're evil! Do we have to chat about it all day?" Testify, sister!
The First tells her that Angel will be dead by sunrise, and that Buffy has no idea who she's dealing with. Buffy, with that specific teenage girl snark: "Let me guess. Is it...evil?" BWA HA HA! The First morphs into some large bug-looking thing, and croaks in a red-rum voice, "Dead by sunrise!" Okay, if they were going for cheesily hilarious, that was great. The bug creature looked about as real as the monster at the end of It. And every time I hear that "Dead by sunrise!" croak, I start giggling uncontrollably. Sadly, I don't think it was actually meant to be funny.
Buffy looks for Angel at the mansion, but he's not there. She finds him on a hilltop, looking over the town. They're both wearing heavy coats. This is ridiculous. He babbles about kids already being awake for Christmas. Buffy begs him to get inside, as it's almost sunrise. Angel says that The First showed him who he truly is. Buffy rightly points out that he shouldn't trust The First's motives. Angel says that The First told him to take Buffy and then kill her, and that part of him wanted to. He says that it's too hard to fight his desire for Buffy. Then, the famous farm-fresh line, "It's not the demon in me that needs killing, Buffy. It's the man." Not. Saying. A. Word. Buffy tells him that he has the power "to do real good, to make amends." Episode title! Drink! Well, if you won't, I will, just to make it through this scene. She then one-ups him on the cheese: "But if you die now, then all that you ever were was a monster." He tells her that she can't understand the things he's done, and to go. She hits him, and he returns the favor, knocking her to the ground. He grabs her, and she whimpers. His voice breaking, he asks her, "Am I a thing worth saving? Am I a righteous man?" I was thinking I should have invested in a Cheese-O-Meter for this episode, but it would have ended up on the scrap heap alongside my Bitch-O-Meter, so it's probably just as well I didn't. Buffy tells him that she loves him, and that she hates that their relationship is so hard. "I know everything that you did, because you did it to me." That does it. I am officially lactose intolerant. Angel begs her to let him "be strong." I agree with her when she counters, "Strong is fighting. It's painful, and it's every day." I can identify with the "painful" part, at least. "It's what we have to do, and we can do it together." She continues that if he's too weak to go on, she won't mourn for him, but stops upon seeing the huge cheese anvils falling out of the sky. Oh, wait -- I think that's supposed to be snow. They look up in wonder. Aack! The dairy! It's like a nightmare episode of Smallville -- huge amounts of cheese and no homoeroticism. Willow and Oz, lying on her bed, get up and go to the window. Joyce and Faith walk out onto the porch and smile. Faith still looks amazing. What is it with this girl? Giles looks out his window. Xander wakes up in his sleeping bag. The only good thing about the snow is that it ended the cheesy dialogue.
Cut to the main drag. The TV weather guy is announcing that due to a severe cold front, Sunnydale is getting its first snow ever, and that they won't see the sun at all that day. Buffy and Angel walk down the street holding hands. The clouds suddenly part, and Angel's incinerated. Not really, but I'd still be laughing. Plus, then maybe Spike would have gone to L.A. and set up the detective agency. I can just picture it:
Cordelia: Spike Investigations. We help the helpless.
Random Woman: Oh good. I have this problem...
Spike: Sod off.
I could watch that in an endless feedback loop. Anyway, there's at least a foot of very fake-looking snow on the street. It's probably the nicest moment Buffy and Angel have ever shared. That's really sad. The end.
Well, except for my rant. Let me say first that I didn't hate most of this episode. It was heavy-handed, sure, but it had plenty of good parts. This last scene, though...first of all, I find it hard to buy that Angel would give up and kill himself. This is the man who endured hundreds of years of torture, remember? But more importantly, I could have lived with the massively cheesy dialogue if Buffy had gotten through to Angel that his life was worth something. And the happy ending doesn't really bother me -- we've certainly been sadly lacking in that department lately. But this divine snow and eclipse, I just can't buy. One reason "The Wish" worked as an It's A Wonderful Life takeoff was that we knew Buffy's existence had made such a positive difference to the world. But at this point, there's really no reason to think that Angel's life is worth saving. Even with what's happened since then on Buffy and Angel, I don't think it's at all clear. I suppose it's something you have to take on faith, and my fundamental problem with this ending is that I don't. Well, that and all the cheese.
I made it through this episode. I am a righteous recapper. A righteous recapper who can never, ever have any dairy products again.