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Previously on Boston Public: Anthony Heald told The Hook Lady that she'd be allowed to T.A. at Winslow; Harvey called Lionel Pratt a douchebag; Talk Time served Harvey with a lawsuit on behalf of Lionel; Anthony Heald went on a date with The Hook Lady, and she kissed him on the cheek.
It's a sunny day outside Winslow High, and a steamy one inside it, as two students grope each other in a little alcove off the main hallway. Actually, it's not so much an alcove as it is the middle of hallway, with a window on one side and a food machine on the other. So it's no surprise when Marla Hendricks bangs on the food machine and disrupts the grope-fest. She asks the boy if he wants "to keep that hand? I see you doing that again, you are gonna end up like The Hook Lady!" She sends the kids off to class, and then turns around to find The Hook Lady lurking behind her. "Hook Lady? Is that what you call me?" Marla says, "I was referring figuratively to someone with a hook in literature." Who in literature would that be? "That transvestite captain who was chasing around Peter Pan. The cross-dresser." Heh. "Get over yourself. It's a big world, and you are not the only lady in it with a hanger on the end of your nub. And what are you doing stalking me?" The Hook Lady explains that she was simply going to one of the food vending machines: "What a coincidence to find you in the vicinity." Marla says, "I will drop you with one shot. Don't be fooled because I'm petite." Heh. Marla's doing good so far today. But then The Hook Lady steps close and gets all creepy and says, "It would be interesting if you and I fought, wouldn't it?"
The office. Scott, Steven, and The Exposition Fairy. "Smell that boot!" Oh dear Lord. And the poor actress is acting like she knows this gag has been totally ruined, and that she's slowly being transformed into someone the audience will vaguely dread, instead of someone they like. "Oh," says Scott, "it's a boot now. She brought in a boot." "That is the boot of smut! Have you read the 'Dear Helen' column in the school paper today? Breast-only orgasms. I don't pay taxes" "on your nineteen thousand dollars" "to have my daughter read about how she can have an orgasm by having her breasts squeezed." The Exposition Fairy strays beyond what is, strictly speaking, her jurisdiction, and points out that the column is responsible, insofar as it provides girls with a viable route to satisfaction that doesn't involve intercourse. "Smell it!" I hope she still means the boot. The phone rings, so Louisa retreats into exposition, handing the phone to Steven: "It's your ex. Emergency." Apparently, Steven's ex-wife is hysterical, and it has something to do with someone named Brooke. Then he starts to go, and Scott asks him what's wrong, and he says, "I don't know. My daughter may have killed someone." This is, of course, in front of The Shoe Lady, which is just asking for her to come back with: "Smell that stiletto! That is the stiletto of a principal who cannot even raise his own daughter!"
Somewhere on the streets of Boston, Steven gets out of his mysteriously snazzy-looking car, and meets up with his ex-wife. Together, they go over to the front steps of a school, in front of which, in the street, is a body covered with a sheet. The sigh, and lean on each other. A cop approaches and tells them that Brooke is inside giving her statement. X starts to go, but Steven stays to ask about "the, uhthe victim" He lifts the sheet. It's a goat. "It's a goat?" says Steven. "She killed a goat? Why didn't you tell me it was a goat?" X says she didn't know. "It's a goat! IT'S A GOAT!" KHAAAAAAAAN!
The hallway. The Hook Lady has reported to Scott the details of her conversation with Marla, and so the scene begins with Scott asking, incredulously, "You're sure you didn't mishear?" No, she is sure Marla referred to her as The Hook Lady, but Scott assures her that that is not her nickname around the school. Just then, Harvey approaches, wanting to know why the school has not procured a lawyer to defend him. Scott explains that he intends to argue Harvey's case himself, at least in the initial stages. "It's a trick!" But Scott assures him he's for real, so Harvey goes away, but not without first greeting The Hook Lady. "Hello, Hook Lady." Marla approaches, and the sparks fly between her and the Hook Ladyblah blah you have a hookblah blah you're fatrrreeeeowwrrr fft fft hsssss. It's like a road trip with Hobey. Not that I've been on one; I'm just saying. Anyway, Marla's crusade for the day has to do, in fact, with the food-vending machines. Apparently, they contain unhealthy food, and are therefore a hazard, and she's all combative and confrontational, and Scott tells her to make an appointment and come to his office. The Hook Lady gives Marla a creepy look. I wonder if she's crazy.
The Un-geon. One of Ronnie's students is explaining why it's stupid that they have to know dates from historyno, he's explaining why he shouldn't have to read a history book that's full of liesno, wait, he's explaining why they shouldn't have to read Shakespeare. Whatever. It's from the David Kelley cookie-cutter "disgruntled yet well-informed student" speech file. "Lemme tell you something about Shakespeare. I know a lot about Shakespeare, see, he was a playwright." Shout-out? Probably not. I'm a playwright, though. I meanwhen I'm not recapping. "He sat down with his little quill with one goal in mind." To meet girls? "To fill seats." Oh, man, this guy doesn't know a thing about playwriting. And yet, he keeps talking. "I mean, just like every playwright who's scared the house is gonna close, he's threw in the sex, and the death, and the gay stuff, hey, he even threw in some of the mother-son kinky gay stuff. I mean, a lot of this crap is the same, and we don't wanna say it because it's 'Shakespeare.' And I'm sick of schools jammin' him. And I'm sick of actors, after they do Lethal Weapon, doin' him. Take the guys books, put 'em on the shelf, and if we wanna read 'em, fine. But I don't think schools should be jammin' him." The other students applaud this upstart, who, for reasons which I think are self-explanatory, I shall call Kit Marlowe. Ronnie ponders this turn of events. Then she pulls out a knife and stabs Kit Marlowe above the eye. Not really, but that's how Kit Marlowe died, sohey, umwhere was I?
Chapter Twenty-Six
“ Anyway, her principal looks pained, which is an expression Steven ought to recognize and sympathize with. But he doesn't. ”
Sanctum Non-Stevenorium. Steven and X are in the principal's office at Brooke's school, as the principal explains to Brooke that "that goat would be alive, well, and chewing his cud, if you had not tried to spirit him away." Apparently, she stole the goat, who was the school mascot, and "liberated" him into oncoming traffic, as part of a protest against the school team being the Rebels, "as in 'the South shall rise again' Rebels, as in 'the Confederate flag' Rebels" She makes a good point, though killing the goat was likely not the way to go. Anyway, her principal looks pained, which is an expression Steven ought to recognize and sympathize with. But he doesn't.
Dick Teachie's room. Talk Time is asking, incredulously, "Why do I have to do the talking?" rendering her nickname the most prescient ever in the history of Mighty Big TV, with the possible exception of "Probably Gay Jack." Dick Teachie says, "You were voted by the class to be the lawyer." Um, wouldn't she know that already? Ah, the perennial problem with beginning a scene with an incredulous question rears its head once more. Anyway, Talk Time doesn't want to be the lawyer, nor does she want to go up against Guber, "he's a Nazi." The upcoming hearing has to do with Scott's motion to dismiss, and so it will be Talk Time's duty to convince a judge that the case has merit. "I still don't know why I gotta do the talking." Um, because you're Talk Time! Dick Teachie tries to psych up the class with a speech that ends with, "This is America!"
Teacher's lounge. Ronnie is eating lunch and looking at a book of some kind when Billy Zane appears. He's surprising her, because his lunch cancelled, or something, and wants to see where she works. Ronnie's upset because her students hate Shakespeare. "I mean, I don't expect everyone to love him, but they don't even have an appreciation for him!" Guh? Isn't that kind of the same thing? Billy Zane suggests that perhaps he just seems dry to them on the page, and that might be rectified if he were to, say, come in and perform a scene. "Ohthatuhyou're very kind." She obviously doesn't want him anywhere near her classroom, but he persists: "Look, to be honest, I've been a little envious of what you're doing here, and it put a bug in me to educate, and Shakespeare is something that I'm pretty good at. I'll pick a scene, and I'll bring it in, and I'll turn 'em, you watch." Just then, Harvey comes in and introduces himself. Ronnie tells him that they've already met. "I think I'd remember a pretty face like that. Unless you have two faces, and I met the other one." Heh. Ronnie has some lame comeback about garlic breath, and Billy Zane piles on a lamer one about nose hair, but Harvey is the clear winner here. Still, Ronnie and Billy Zane look at each other like they've really showed up the old man by insulting his odor and appearance, after he pointed out Ronnie's blatant back-stabbing.
Chapter Twenty-Six
The hallway. Scott reminds Steven -- or, in fact, the audience -- that he's arguing the motion to dismiss tomorrow. Steven even says, "Do I remember? The whole school wants to be let out early so they can attend!" Yadda yadda, we should win, blah dee blah. Marla appears: "I made my appointment! I came by your office!" Scott tells her to make another one. Steven wants to know what's going on. "This school is promoting heart disease, diabetes, high cholesterol. Is this school for those things, Steven?" Steven says, "Absolutely. What is she talking about?" She gives him the vending machine spiel, and Steven directs her back to Scott, who tells her to make another appointment, and zzzzzzzzzzzhuh, wuh? Meanwhile, on the stairwell, Ronnie is explaining to Harry that Billy Zane is the worst performer in history, and under no circumstances can she let him perform in her class. The problem is, "he doesn't think he's funny. He thinks he's good. It'll be a disaster." Harry advises her to tell Billy Zane that the school said no. Meanwhile, again, they pass The Exposition Fairy, who is yelling exposition into the hallway from the office. I mean, she's yelling it at people: some gathered parents who are upset about the breast-orgasm column. Louisa insists that "the medical advice this 'Helen' has offered, so far, checks out." The parents are not mollified by this. For my part, it just makes me suspect that "this 'Helen'" is a actually a "Louisa." Anyway, the parents continue to grouse ("Hubbub! Hubbub! Hubbub!") until The Exposition Fairy promises to schedule an appointment with Steven for them. "In the meantime, you should all check out the statistics on teen pregnancy, on sexually transmitted diseases, and if you're not talking to your kids about this stuff, then maybe this 'Ask Helen' column isn't such a bad thing." The parents grumble a little more quietly ("Murmur, murmur, murmur"). But then Steven comes out of his office and says, "Are they gooooonnne?" Umif he wasn't sure they were gone, why would he come barging out of his office? Is he a moron? I guess he must be. Him or the writer. One of the two.
The hallway. Lauren and Brooke stride along, and Lauren does the old blah blah I can't believe how big you've gotten blah dee blah. Only in this case, it's only to set up "Wow! Seventeen? You must be killing goats by now!" Brooke gives her this total death stare, which is appropriate, since that's not funny at all. Then Brooke confides in Lauren something else that Steven won't find funny: "I got expelled."
"WHAT!?" yells Steven. We're now in his office, as he begins a scene with the most incredulous question in the history of the show. Steven doesn't understand, and rants about how Brooke has no disciplinary record, and how she's been a model student, anduh-oh, little Brooke has begun to look a wee bit uncomfortable. As Steven begins to the dial the phone, Brooke reveals that there have been a few other incidents: "I set off the fire alarm. Once. To get out of taking a test. It's the Stanford Nine, it's racist. I organized a school condom sale on AIDS awareness week. And there was a week in September when I refused to bathe. It was a whole Title Nine thing, see, the girl's locker room is, umand, Iuh, punched a kid, after she insulted me, and I burned one book, as a protest. And I called my guidance counselor skanky." At this point, Steven hangs up the phone. "All nothing, Dad. It's so lame." Heh. So, it seems that Brooke is an issue-minded young revolutionary. Let's get those brains percolating on a nickname, people. No doubt I'll cook up a poll of some kind on the subject by the commercial break.
Dick Teachie's room. Teachie brings in Talk Time and asks her to have a seat. "What's the biggest thing you've ever done in your life?" Talk Time says she doesn't know like eighty times, and concludes that, perhaps, it was when she won a track race in the seventh grade. "So, in the scheme of things, tomorrow would kind of be a big day, wouldn't it? Going into a real court of law. Arguing a real case. For a senior in high school, that's pretty amazing. So I'm curious. Why aren't you excited? You seem to be complaining about it." Talk Time says she's nervous; Teachie says he gets that, but it's no excuse for complaining. Then he takes a seat by her. "I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. You know the way we tell every student that they can be whatever they wanna be? It's a big lie. Most students have limits they're never gonna shake. Some are even stupid. But you? You can do what you want. Be whatever you want. You're an incredible kid, Debbie. Now you're crying, which confuses me." And she says, "No one's ever said that to me before." And he says, "Well, I'm sayin' it. Right now." And Key Grip says, "Awwwwww." Then he tells her not to sweat the outcome of the case, but that she should never duck an opportunity. And "don't be afraid of Scott Guber. You'll kick his ass." It's a very sweet scene. And she does seem like a good kid here. She's been mostly annoying up to know, though. I'm still not over her whole "thinking about other women is cheating" nonsense.
“ Scott handles it pretty well, saying that Marla's a good teacher and, in any case, it's not appropriate for The Hook Lady to ask him for favors just because they're 'courting.' Because the year is 1750, and they live in Vienna. ”
Boston skyline by night. The Hook Lady and Anthony Heald are at a schmancy restaurant for dinner. She's asking him if it's wise to argue the case himself, and he says, "It's just the motion to dismiss. Should we lose, and if the case goes to trial, I'll turn it over to a law firm." This is word-for-word what he said to Steven earlier. Were they not sure both scenes were going to make it into the show? Hmm. "You're not afraid of the ridicule should you lose? Are you trying to prove yourself, Scott? That you're capable of being more than a vice-principal?" Scott demurs, but she tells him it's okay if he's trying to prove something to himself. He asks how she knows him so well, and she says, "Well, during my last therapy session, Dr. Coburn [a.k.a. 'Therapist McMustache'] had to go to the men's room, and when he did so, I looked up your file." Scott freaks, but she's kidding. Or she says she's kidding. She may still be crazy. Because The Exposition Fairy is not here, Scott must undertake the awkward task of shifting conversation topics. "I certainly have more important things to do than go to court. The parents are up in arms about this sex advice column. Marla's on a rampage over vending machines. It never stops." That's really his line. You can hear the show screeching, as the dialogue tries to force the scene to change course, like the Titanic careening towards the iceberg, throwing its engines desperately into reverse. The Hook Lady tells Scott she wants him to fire Marla, because she's a nutjob. He says, "Do you really want to be playing the mental stability card?" Then he thinks better of saying that, but it's too late, because he already said it. "I'm sorry." "When you say things like that, it make me feel like you still doubt me." I still doubt her. Doubt that she's not crazy, I mean. Anyway, Scott handles it pretty well, saying that Marla's a good teacher and, in any case, it's not appropriate for The Hook Lady to ask him for favors just because they're "courting." Because the year is 1750, and they live in Vienna. Then, the conversation moves BACK to the sex column (screech!), and Scott asks if it's true that women can have breast orgasms. The Hook Lady explains, "The nipple is connected to the same nervous system." That is, the human one, yes? She says it as though each woman has eight or nine nervous systems, and one of them is for nookie. Is that true, Sars? ["Yes." -- Sars] Anyway, "it's common for mothers to enjoy orgasm while nursing their babies. I had them with Jeremy all the time." Scott just about knocks his plate off the table, he's so flustered. Or maybe he's having an orgasm. You see, when men hear certain things, it affects their ear-system, which is connected to their head, which isyou know the song.
Chez Cooke. Ronnie is explaining to Billy Zane why he can't come in and do Shakespeare. Actually, she's taking Harry's advice and making up a lie about how the school won't let him. "I'll do it anyway. What's the worst that can happen? They'll ask me to leave?" She tries to quell the fire, but he gets all, "Now I'm determined more than ever to do it! School policy indeed." Hey, I just realized, I made a Titanic reference before, and he was in the movie Titanic. Totally unintentional, I swear. Anyway, Ronnie comes clean: "I don't want you to do it. Because I'm afraid that kids'll laugh." He's really dim, and she has to repeat this six more times in different ways. Then he says, "I'm coming tomorrow." Oh, Ronnie, when will you learn to say no to men? Hopefully, sometime after I meet you. But you really ought to learn it at some point.
Sanctum Stevenorium. Still late that night. Steven pores over various papers. Lauren comes in. She really has become the Coach Kevin of Season Two. She's all up in everybody else's scenes, trying to steal screentime off their story arcs. She says, "Either we're way too dedicated, or we just don't have personal lives." Steven snaps at her, and she gets all defensive and asks if he's okay. He says, "Can I be allowed to hate the job once in a while?" No, wait, he doesn't, but can you blame me for getting identical scenes confused? I'd have to be paying pretty close attention to tell them apart, and I can't really be expected to do that. Anyway, Steven talks about how Brooke got expelled, and then he actually says, "I am in the business of touching lives. And I have lost my grip on two that I care the most about." Lauren asks about what happened between Steven and X: "You never talk about it." Maybe that's because he doesn't WANT to talk about it, eh what, Nosey McGetyourownplot? But Steven says, "Oh, you know. A string of early mornings and late nights. You wake up one year suddenly hating each other." Then he says, "The jobI don't have to tell you, it beats you up." Oh, brother, here we go again. "And I needed her. If for nothing else, just to hold onto. Just to say, 'I know, baby.' That's all I wanted at the end of my day. Or even to say nothing, I'd have settled for a look. But you know what I got, Lauren? Anger and resentment. For spending too much time in the place that just beat me up. And one day, she left. And she took my daughter away. She took my little girl." Lauren says, "You still have her." And Steven says, "Yep." But he doesn't sound convinced. And that is kinda sad. Poor Steven. Still, his daughter seems to rock, so that's something.
Some transition shots indicate that we are crossing to the other side of the freeway, as it were, and then we see that we are at Raymond J. Flinn Academy, which is, presumably, where Mini-Stee goes to school. Sure enough, Steven and X are sitting in the principal's office, waiting for a meeting to begin. X suggests that perhaps she should do the talking, but Steven points out that he has been involved in thousands of conferences of this kind, and that he is perfectly capable of doing exactly what isthen the principal comes in, and Steven stands up and starts shouting, "This is an outrage! It was an accident! She didn't even get a hearing!" Principal Flinn, as I'll call him, assures Steven that his daughter will get a hearing, and that she's smart, and a leader, but that they "can't control her." X is all, "So you give up? Just like that?" What part of "can't" does she not understand? They have clearly already tried and failed. Principal Flinn says, "Mrs. Harper. This was a very beloved goat." Case closed.
“ Some honorable judge presides over the motion to dismiss in the case of Lionel Pratt v. Harvey Lipschultz. And you know what that means: time for me to translate that fancy lawyer jargon into understandable everyday speech. Scott approaches the bench and says, 'Me talk now. What Harvey do is bad.' ”
In the car outside, Steven and X have what seems like a very familiar fight. "Why didn't you tell me this was going on? I'm her father." "But you would have dealt with it like a principal." "Don't accuse me" Blah dee blah, I'm not a bad parent, you're a bad parent, no you, no you, you're always at school, blah blah blah. Blah. Steven honks the horn to get her to shut up. "This is about our daughter. And you have noLuanna, you have to let me know what's going on." X is all, "You have never wanted to know what's really going on. You just want to know that everything's okay. You want her to sit on your knee and be daddy's little girl, and she likes doing that, and it's been a perfect arrangement for both of you. I'm not trying to say that in anger. She loves you. And you love her. And that's great. But you have never wanted to know what's really going on." Steven is silent, perhaps pondering the incisive wisdom of her comments, or perhaps thinking, "She's not even that hot. Wasn't I going to ask out Marilyn? What happened to that? Hey, where is Marilyn? She's not in this episode at all."
Courtroom. Some honorable judge presides over the motion to dismiss in the case of Lionel Pratt v. Harvey Lipschultz. And you know what that means: time for me to translate that fancy lawyer jargon into understandable everyday speech. Scott approaches the bench and says, "Me talk now. What Harvey do is bad." Harvey is upset to hear this, but the judge tells him to be quiet. "But is no reason to make attack on him with the tribal rule-stick. For many moons now, man who teach can bend rule-stick like it made from field-grass, when he wield power over those who learn. Do Harvey say bad thing? He do. But this not same thing as to hit Lionel with the closed fist. Lionel no even say that he feel hurt at all, let alone say how." Talk Time raises her hand, and asks if she can respond point by point, because she's having trouble keeping up with Scott, but the judge tells her to wait her turn. Scott goes on, "Also, to be a breaking of the rule-stick, Lionel must show loss of gold pieces from his pocket, but he no show this. Last thing is: this not show good example for others who learn from those who teach. Should they drag teaching-folk to the place of tribal judgment each time they do not like what words come from the teaching one's mouth? This is like Boulder of Daktar rolling down Hill of Mnjjlwin." Talk Time gets up and starts talking, but I can just quote her directly, because she's not using fancy legal jargon. "You can't call your students douchebags! Who sets the example if not the teacher?" The judge agrees with Guber that Talk Time needs to show damages, either economic or medical, and Talk Time says, "Our damages are putative. That means they're coming." See? She did it for me. The judge wants to know how, so she explains: "Lionel Pratt plans to apply for college. Admissions officers will want recommendations, they'll want to know how he is thought of. How is he ever supposed to get into Dartmouth if the faculty at Winslow High thinks he's a dick?" Talk Time alleges that Harvey is a legend at the school, and the other teachers look up to him, and Harvey stands up and says, "That's a lie!" Heh. Anyway, Talk Time says there ought to be a consequence for Harvey's behavior, but Scott counters, "Question is not is Harvey bad. Question is does Lionel have reason to drag him to Cave of Judging. Many many papers I give you show that other teaching-folk think Harvey to be a bad man. Lionel is not hurt by his bad words." Talk Time says, "I told you. It's putative." They glare at each other.
“ Umokay. This is a very funny idea. But how on earth will this convince them to like Shakespeare? Zuh? How will this prove his point to Ronnie? Guh? Like The Shoe Lady before him, Billy Zane has fallen victim to David Kelley's theory that things that make no sense are funnier than things that do. ”
The Un-geon. Ronnie is prepping her students for Billy Zane's Shakespeare performance. "You might be tempted to laugh. Because Shakespeare, when performed, can sometimes be funny. But I'm going to ask you to respect the feelings of the actor, give him your attention andokay, look. He's a friend of mine. He takes this very seriously so, out of courtesy to him, and as a favor to me, please, please, don't laugh. In fact, if you don't laugh, I'll take you all out to dinner." Heh.
Sanctum Stevenorium. The Harper Image is waiting in the office for Steven, and he tells her she really did get expelled from school, but she knows that already. He says they've decided to have her go to Winslow. She's not so psyched about this. "Mom agreed to that?" Steven tells her that the idea is for him and her to find more opportunities to cross paths, so he can be more of a dad. "You're my dad now. I don't want you to be my principal." She says that they're good at birthdays and holidays and weekends, and he's all, "Well, I wanna be good at more than that." She says, "I'm afraid we're gonna hate each other. What ifwe hate each other." And Steven's all, "Well. That'd be a start, I guess." Awww. This episode is all about the sweetness. And The Hook Lady, of course.
The hallway. Harvey is yelling at Scott that his defense sucked because he said such awful things about him. Marla appears and yells at Scott that she made another appointment, and he better actually be there this time. Then Lauren and Steven walk by, and we follow them. Steven is telling Lauren about Daughter of the Revolution's transfer to Winslow, and Lauren promises to look out for her. I'm starting to get annoyed by the hallway. All it's really for is snapshots that delineate the various storylines, to remind us what's going on in case we took a nap for part of the episode, done while the characters walk fast so it seems like there's lots of action even though there's not. It's like an environmental supplement to The Exposition Fairy. So, it's not so much a hallway as it is Delineation Alley, where you can purchase all your plot point needs. Anyway, just then, Brooke comes bounding down the stairs and yells at her father. "You're threatening to shut down the school newspaper? They asked me to be a contributing editor, I won't let you censor" "They saddled you up to deal with me?" "Nobody saddled me up." "You're being used, Brooke! I am the principal of this school." "You're talking to me like you're my father." And so on. But if she wanted different treatment, she probably shouldn't have stormed up to him all pouty and acted like his daughter. Brooke stalks off. Lauren is all, "First days are always bumpy."
The Un-geon. Billy Zane is wearing a flowy-silky shirt, 'cause he's about to do Shakespeare, and he's giving a little preface. "The topic he wrote about, love, lust, death, these remain timeless. Much like the universal language of music. So, it suddenly occurred to me that, instead of coming in and perform a scene from Shakespearein 1969 there was a film version of Romeo and Juliet with a really wonderful love theme. And I'd like to sing that for you right now." Umokay. This is a very funny idea. But how on earth will this convince them to like Shakespeare? Zuh? How will this prove his point to Ronnie? Guh? Like The Shoe Lady before him, Billy Zane has fallen victim to David Kelley's theory that things that make no sense are funnier than things that do. Oh well. Billy Zane sings "A Time For Us." He's got a decent voice, but he hams it way up. The class laughs. For a while, it seems like he's trying to make them laugh, and is in on the joke, but then he sheepishly stops the music, so I guess he's not. Oh, all right: Heh. But only because Billy Zane really sells it.
“ X pulls up to pick her up, and she hugs Steven and gets in the car. He watches her drive off, muttering under his breath, 'Goodnight, baby.' The camera pulls up into a high crane shot of Winslow High. Andit begins to snow. No, it doesn't, but, you know, it might as well. ”
Vice-office. Marla is gnawing off Scott's ear about obesity and diabetes and blah blah blah ENOUGH WITH THIS. Scott says, "Marla, we make over one hundred thousand dollars a year from those machines. It's about buying books, and uniforms. We need that money." Marla tries to protest, but Scott downshifts into menacing and says, "And as you go in search of another battle, don't pick Meredith Peters. Do I make myself clear?" Then, when she tries to leave, he stops her, and goes soft: "Marla. The issue of school nutrition, it's a valid one. The idea that we sell junk food to make money, all the schools are doing it, it'sfrightening. And if a teacher stands up to make noise about it, odds are he or she will command some attention. The reason you have a difficult time doing so, is because you're all about noise. Now, I say this not to hurt you, but Marla, you seize on issues of the day and simply attack with them. I don't know whether it's your medication, or your underlying medical condition, or just your personality, but whatever it is, it's too bad because, often, what you have to say, however validnobody listens." Wow, Scott really has been going to therapy. The Exposition Fairy comes in and tells Scott that the judge ruled on Harvey's case. Scott opens the envelope. "I won."
Delineation Alley. Harvey struts along, pleased with himself.
Dick Teachie's room. "It was dismissed without prejudice." Talk Time wants to know what that means. "Well, as I understand it: Lionel, you're free to sue again if your damages become real. The judge just didn't buy 'putative.' But, hey, for my money, we won. The school has an incentive to see you go to college now. And it'll be a long time, if ever, before another teacher calls a student here a dick. I'm proud of all of you" Pep pep pep, and so on. He's frigging Knute Rockne.
The Un-geon. Ronnie is comforting poor Billy Zane, who found the laughter "culturally depressing. I mean, it would be one thing if I was bad, but I so totally nailed that. I mean, you'd tell me if I was bad, right?" She says she would. "I shouldn't have picked 'A Time For Us.' It's too painful." She agrees. Then bursts out laughing. He finally gets it. "WellI was funny, right?"
End of the day. Steven walks Mini-Stee out of the school, arguing about whether or not she's allowed to take the bus. She doesn't want a ride from her mom, and gets all, "I have breasts nowI'm old enough to drive" as though those things render her impervious to the gang violence in the neighborhood. Then she insists that Steven sees a little girl when he looks at her, but a) we've seen no evidence of that, and b) she kind of acts like a little girl. So, basically: Shut up, Brooke. X pulls up to pick her up, and she hugs Steven and gets in the car. He watches her drive off, muttering under his breath, "Goodnight, baby." The camera pulls up into a high crane shot of Winslow High. Andit begins to snow. No, it doesn't, but, you know, it might as well.
week: Dick Teachie finds his lady in bed with another guy, and gets arrested for attacking him; Lauren encourages a student to pursue a career as a singer, incurring the wrath of her parents; The Hook Lady invites Scott to spend the night.