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So, whatever, lots of stuff happened in this episode, but there's no point in delaying the big-ticket item: Boardwalk Empire finally gave up trying to write actual storylines for Angela Darmody and instead killed her off, plus Fun Louise, in the most punchline-y way possible. Slow clap for this show, I think they finally made me hate it.
Hmm, what else happened? Van Alden got served with divorce papers while his nanny remained perplexing in a very Swedish way. Nucky fired Icky, his poor, put-upon lawyer, and instead signed on with Rothstein's lawyer, who's already got his hands full with this Black Sox trial.
Jimmy is getting more and more overwhelmed as he tries to be the new Nucky. With the new influx of Irish whiskey into Atlantic City, Jimmy and his cohorts are finding themselves with more inventory than they can move, and it leads to squabbling, infighting and a whole lotta conspiratorial looks between Luciano, Lansky and Capone. Meanwhile, the city elders are similarly displeased that the Negro strikes are still happening. Jimmy doesn't know why they don't just kick in the extra nickel in pay, but nobody else thinks that's a good idea, and the Commodore manages to muster up enough wherewithal to call Jimmy a pussy, so...
Upon Eli's instruction, strikebreakers set upon the black folks with clubs and chains and such. And while they're there, they give Halloran a serious once-over, which, as Eli makes sure he understands, is a message to quit blabbing to Esther Randolph already.
Meanwhile, the ghost of Hans Schroeder lingers. Randolph seems intent on using his murder as the hook upon which to hang all of Nucky's other charges. At the same time, young Teddy is acting out so he can get some of Margaret's attention, which is understandably being spent on Emily, who will probably not regain the use of her legs. Margaret ends up in church, looking to buy her daughter's salvation. Or at least her own absolution. She hands the priest all the money she's been hoarding away as an "act of devotion," and the priest, who knows better, totally takes it anyway.
Jimmy also sends Mickey on a mission to see if they can make a deal with Manny to sell in Philly. Which is fucking BALLS. Manny might refer to it as chutzpah. Manny also might react by going to town on Mickey in order to extract Jimmy's whereabouts, then stalking into the Darmody house and shooting Jimmy dead as he post-coitally exits the shower. Only, as I said before, it was Fun Louise who was taking the after-sex shower. And after telling her that her husband did this to her, Manny offs Angela as well. Before she could even get hooked on the heroin that Lucky Luciano said is so popular with artist types.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Previously: Nucky went to Ireland.
Currently: the whiskey that Nucky made a deal for is being unloaded from ships in Hoboken. Owen supervises as the crates of "Feeney's Irish Oats" are loaded onto trucks and takes to various locations around Atlantic City. We see one particular shipment being dropped off at Babbette's, so it's good to know what team she's on.
With Atlantic City's black workers picketing on the Boardwalk, Halloran and a couple other cops stand idly by and collect a paycheck. Owen carries a crate through this crowd -- Purnsley allows him to pass through -- so he can deliver one crate to a well-dressed grump of a man in the kitchen at the Ritz. Owen says Nucky sent him. The guy sniffs at a stupid case of oats, until Owen produces the whiskey. Real Irish whiskey -- he's impressed. But who's going to serve it? "They'll be back," Owen assures him. He knows what an empty stomach feels like. The Ritz will take 400 cases. Nice sales technique on Owen!
Across town, Sigrid feeds the baby while Van Alden watches and tries to make small talk. It's as awkward as it sounds, particularly when the topic floats to nursing babies. "I tried to feed my baby sister through my bosom" sounds even more hilarious in a Swedish accent. Van Alden spots an envelope on the table and demands to know why he didn't get this immediately, as per his orders. It's a petition of divorce, and since it's from Mrs. VA, it comes with a note that says, "Please attend to this as soon as your activities allow."
At the hospital, Margaret, Nucky, and Teddy arrive to visit poor Emily. Dr. Holt tells them Emily is sleeping through a bit of a rough patch, which naturally upsets Margaret. Holts tells her Emily will need your love and attention "later on," when presumably she'll be coping with her paralysis. As Nucky takes Teddy inside to see his sister, Doc says that the good news is that Emily's upper body, and vital organs, seem fine. But she may not ever get fully better. "Mr. Thompson is a man of means," Margaret offers, which is both sad and kind of funny. Money won't help this. The doctor tells her that his little nine-year-old daughter prays for his patients every night. "You're meant to ask God to intercede for others," Margaret notes ruefully. Not for yourself. Doc tells her the test results will come in on Friday. Margaret glances down the hall and spots a kid on crutches, trying to maneuver on crutches.
Inside the hospital room, Margaret hands Emily a new doll -- the sister to "Miss Wheatley" (who got burned in the great polio purge). Meanwhile, out in the hall, Teddy sits sullenly.
Mickey -- neck brace and all -- is supervising the watering down of George Remus's government "medicinal" alcohol when Jimmy, Al, Lucky, and Meyer show up to check the progress. They need to deliver this stuff, but Mickey doesn't have the guys to do it yet. Lucky says to go hire some, then. "There's 50 spooks out on the Boardwalk," he says, with utmost charm. Lucky, Meyer and Al all say their bosses are onto them, not to mention Manny Horvitz still wants his money. Lots of pressure on these would-be usurpers. Jimmy is impatient and doesn't want to hear it. He tells Mickey to pay Manny, in booze if he has to; he's Waxey's problem now anyway. Everybody passes sideways glances at how Jimmy's acting, but no one says anything. On his way out, Lucky tells Jimmy to hold up. He shows him the heroin they want to sell. Lansky explains that it provides a higher dose of opiates to the brain than opium does. Jimmy wonders who's gonna buy it. Artist types, Lucky explains; people uptown. "Artist types" automatically means Angela, but after what ends up happening, I wonder if Jimmy will be the one to succumb to the junk. Lucky hands Jimmy the packet and tells him to get a few samples out to the locals. "That's great," Jimmy snots, "but before you start squawking again, how about getting THIS out to the locals?" He seems like a great boss.
Nucky is once again heaping abuse on Icky for the predicament he's in. The trial can't be moved from Camden and Esther Randolph is relentless. Icky seems less and less inclined to tap-dance for Nucky's satisfaction, and is resigned to claiming medical hardship (for his hand? He holds up his bandaged paw and raged that that wouldn't prevent him from jacking off, much less going to trial) or just accepting jail time. A five-year sentence, he'd be out in two. Nucky snaps back with extreme sarcasm: "Call those two guinea anarchists from Massachusetts and tell them I found them a new lawyer!" Icky returns that Sacco and Vanzetti have one thing going for them that Nucky doesn't: "Innocence is still a possibility." Nucky tells him to get out, he's fired, and Icky doesn't seem all that broken up about it. Nucky looks down at a newspaper, which has a headline about the Black Sox trial.
At the Commodore's place, dissatisfied business leaders are bitching at Jimmy about how tourist season is upon them and no one can get the "colored situation" under control. Eli doesn't want to use the Klan again, and the Commodore struggles to articulate something. He's making progress with the stroke recovery, but he's not there yet. Jimmy assures his father he'll take care of it. He wants the business leaders to negotiate a settlement. What's a nickel raise across the board compared to what they're losing? Nobody wants to set that example, though. Eli says it's not done, and everyone is aghast at the idea of giving in. At this, the Commodore sputters, and everybody starts looking around, casting aspersions about Jimmy. The fat cats ultimately leave Jimmy, Eli, Neary, Bader, Leander and the Commodore to themselves. Eli lays out his plan: 50 guys with billy clubs. This is how it works. Jimmy doesn't want to start a riot. Neary and Eli get into a side conversation about Halloran. Neary mentions how Halloran's been talking to Esther Randolph quite a bit and that he should be keeping his mouth shut. Meanwhile, Leander jabs to Jimmy that his predecessor knew how to keep "the coloreds" happy. Jimmy's like, I get it, you like Nucky better than me; can we figure out a way to end this peacefully now? The Commodore finally has his say, as he croaks out a full sentence: "Why don't you just show 'em your cunt?" Jimmy's all "...What?" But yes, that is what he said. "Lift up your dress," he says. "Let yourself get fucked." Well, well, well. Look who's back in charge.
At home that night, Teddy is saying his prayers with Margaret. She asks if he wants to say a special prayer for Emily, and Teddy obliges. She goes to leave, but he stops her dead in her tracks when he says he can't move his legs. She panicks and begins poking at his legs to check. She gets to his feet and he starts giggling. Completely correctly, she slaps him, hard. What a shit! He starts crying, and just when Nucky comes wandering by. "You were just praying!" he exclaims. Cut to later, as Nucky comforts Margaret in their bedroom. "He's got his father's cruelty," she says, though Nucky says he just wants attention. Margaret is incredulous. "Abandon my sick girl to attend my healthy son?" Nucky says for one thing, she needs to stop running herself ragged. She says she'll manage. He says he'll take Teddy on business with him tomorrow, to give her a break.
The day, on the Boardwalk, the striking blacks are chanting as the baseball-bat wielding crackers round the corner and converge upon them, laying down beatings. Purnsley yells to hold the line, but the picketers are unarmed but for some placards. Meantime, Halloran's two cop buddies run away as the mob descends upon him too.
Elsewhere, Rothstein introduces Nucky to his lawyer, Bill Fallon, who asks young Teddy if he'd like a ball signed by Ty Cobb. "Ty Cobb is a bad man," Teddy says, in that sweet little monotone he has that makes him maybe sound like a devil child. Nucky's like, "But he gets the job done, right? Now run along." After he does, Fallon replaces the Ty Cobb ball with another from his desk drawer. I like this guy. Fallon denigrates Nucky's old lawyer, though he admits he probably can't get the trial moved back to AC either. Fallon does intimate that he can "work magic" with both juries and judges. Nucky asks what happens if he has no money for bribes. Then he's relying solely on Fallon's legal acumen. Rothstein puts in his two cents: "No one likes a long shot more than a gambler."
Halloran sits at home, bandaged and braced. Eli pays him a visit as Halloran whines that "normal white men" did this. I know! Eli's brought him some fresh peas along with some not-very-subtle talk about how sometimes, when bad things happen to us, we have to ask ourselves, "What is it that I've done to deserve this? What should I make sure I never, ever do again?" Halloran is thick, and I think he has bloody gauze packed in his ears, but he gets it. And after Eli leaves, he places a call to the post office.
Back in Atlantic City, Margaret prays in church. Father Sour-Face from before is there, and Margaret tells him about Emily's polio. He reminds her that God is with Emily. Margaret: "...As he was when it happened." He brings up her earlier confession about being tempted by someone. "You ask of God," he lectures, "but what do you offer in return?" She simply says she offers devotion in returns. He tells her that devotion is an act that you demonstrate with actions. However she wants to interpret that.
Jimmy and Chalky meet up to discuss strike matters. They're not unfriendly to each other, though there is an undercurrent of adversarialism. Jimmy stresses that the mob with bats wasn't his idea; neither was the earlier Klan attack. Chalky wonders if ANYTHING is ever Jimmy's idea. He offers that he can make Chalky's murder charge go away by talking to the Governor. Chalky's listening. But he also wants justice for the families of the men who got killed; $3,000 apiece. And finally, he wants the three crackers who did the shooting delivered to him personally. Jimmy looks at Richard, then back to Chalky: he can't do that. "Well, buck," Chalky says. "That's the deal. There's always tourist season."
In New York, Teddy is on phone, telling Margaret he'll be good. Nucky takes the phone and tells her goodnight. He then has a talk with the boy about his kid sister Susan, who was sick with consumption. His mother spent every waking moment taking care of her, and he and Eli got jealous. But we knew our mother loved us just the same. "How about your dad?" Teddy asks. Oh. Him. Nucky lies through his teeth that his father loved them too. Teddy then asks if Nucky's in trouble. Let's not give the kid too much credit -- headless men could have figured it out. "No," Nucky says. "Well, a little." Teddy thinks it's all about him burning down his father's house, which kind of takes Nucky's breath away. He had no idea Teddy saw that, and he explains that what he saw was an accident. Teddy, you can tell, is not buying it, but he says he won't tell.
At Mickey's, Jimmy arrives as the other chickens are squawking. They can't sell this whiskey as the city is drenched in Irish product. Jimmy knows it's Nucky who's behind it. So much for stepping down. Al says they shoulda killed Nucky long ago, but Jimmy blames Al for fucking that up. Meyer says he thought Jimmy had the coast guard in his pocket. Throughout this whole conversation, Lucky keeps sniping undermining statements about Jimmy to whoever will listen. Harrow pipes up about Nucky's man from Ireland who he's sure helped broker the deal. The natives are restless. Jimmy starts hollering at Lucky and Al, but Lansky, the one with his head in the game, always, says the issue at hand is unloading this liquor. He proposes they split it up and sell it back in their respective home territories. Jimmy whines that Atlantic City IS his home territory. Lucky says to sell in Philly, then. Yeeeeah, not under Manny's nose. Jimmy tells Mickey to take Philly, he'll head north in Jersey. He then kicks a crate and generally acts like a brat. And after he leaves, again, everybody again looks at him suuuuuper warily.
At the post office, Van Alden is practicing his testimony for Randolph. He's focusing on Nucky's machinations with Chalky, but Randolph wants to talk about Hans Schroeder. Van Alden evades the topic -- he had a theory once but was told to focus on other things. Esther's like, "Okay, but off the record, you think he did it?" Van Alden says he has no doubt. He takes his leave, as Esther tells her men to "bring him in."
Manny Horvitz is at home when there's a knock on the door. He's understandably wary as he approaches, gun in hand, shoulder rattily bandaged. It's Mickey Doyle, so Manny lets him in. I have to say, I appreciate the comedy value of Mickey's Frankenstein walk now that he has the neck brace. "The walking wounded," Manny proclaims them both, "courtesy of Mr. Darmody." Mickey makes the unconvincing argument that Manny's shooting was all Waxey's doing. Manny uncovers his wound, both to air it out and to shove it in Mickey's face. Figuratively. For now. Mickey reveals a bottle of whiskey and says he'll give him five grand worth to settle Jimmy's debt. Manny is perturbed Jimmy doesn't bring it himself. He tosses Mickey the box of toothpicks he took from his would-be assassins, the one that says "Atlantic City" on it. Then he uses one to clean his wound, like, GAH! Mickey plays dumb and tries to calm Manny down. "You're still in business," he reminds him. "You don't have to deal with him anymore." Manny says he'll take the booze ... but he wants Mickey to tell him where he can find Jimmy. Mickey can't oblige -- "We're partners ... I have to protect his investment." At this, Manny begins to throttle Mickey about the throat (thank God for that neck brace, then!) in order to "change [his] mind."
Back in Atlantic City, Eli has been thrown in a jail cell. Esther pays him a visit and rubs it in that he's now a murder suspect, courtesy of everything Halloran's had to say about Hans Schroeder. "If you have anything to say about your brother," Esther tells him, "please be in touch."
Margaret is at home, emptying her jewelry box into her purse, including the envelope of cash she's been hiding away. She takes it to see Father Sour-Face (who has to hide his glass of red wine before she's shown in). He asks after her little one, and talk turns to how Margaret wants to grasp at hope, however unlikely. She wants her daughter to live and to grow and to run -- is that so bad? She seems to feel guilty, like this is her punishment. The priest brings up their earlier conversation, about an act of devotion. She pulls out her cash and jewels, to give to the church. He's all "This is very unusual, but go on..." She wants to show that she's willing to atone, with this lucrative donation. The priest encourages this filthy and misguided perversion of faith and takes the cash. Gross me out. He then asks, "Shall we pray?"
Jimmy and Angela are at home, looking out to the beach, making fun of a fat sunbather together. She tells him Tommy's at Gillian's; he tells her he's going to have to leave town for a few days. He seems to want her to get angry at him over not telling her why he's leaving, but she neither has the energy nor the inclination. He knows she's dissatisfied. He's going to make it up to her, make everything right in this town, be the man she wants him to be. She tells him a joke she heard out in town today; "A man goes into a hotel, ' I'd like a room and a bath.' Clerk says he can have the room, but you have to take the bath yourself." It's not funny, but I guess it's sexy? Because the two of them start making out.
Hospital. Emily's test results are in, and they don't look great. Looks like the paralysis is going to be permanent. Margaret looks vacant and destroyed. "Did your daughter pray?" she asks. Like it's an accusation. She just looks betrayed by the universe. Doc says the step is to measure Emily for braces and send her home. Meanwhile, Teddy is at home, looking at photo of his family from back when his Dad was alive. Then he puts the Ty Cobb ball in his box. This kid is weird and trouble.
That night, at the Darmody house, we can hear the shower running as Manny Horvitz creeps around outside the windows. Angela is asleep in bed as he enters the house, gun drawn, silently stalking into the bedroom. He clamps a hand over Angela's mouth before she can wake up. She's terrified and tries to scream, but he's stronger. He drags her up, turns her to face the bathroom door, waiting for Jimmy to emerge. His gun is drawn. The bathroom door opens, and Manny fires. Right through the heart. Only SURPRISE! It's not Jimmy taking a post-coital shower but Fun Louise instead! What a swerve! Isn't the death of this fun lesbian so sad and ironic and a little hilarious? After all, Jimmy's life was just saved by his wife's lesbo infidelity. Thank God we got to see her bare breasts as she fell. Wouldn't want to deprive the HBO audience of their requisite full frontal nudity. Manny is agog at both his mistake and this Sapphic display in front of him. Angela runs to Louise's already dead body, sobbing. Gun still drawn, Manny demands to know where Jimmy is. Angela tells him he's gone and then begins to beg. She has a child. She offers him money. Manny looks like he might be swayed, but no. "Your husband did this to you," he tells her. BANG. Heap of hilarious dead lesbians in the corner. Aren't you SHOCKED?? Isn't this not at all what you expected?? Try to call Boardwalk Empire boring NOW. If you do, they might just take another character they never managed to write very well and kill them in the show-offiest way possible. Bleh.
So Angela's dead, and Jimmy's driving a truck full of booze out to Princeton, none the wiser. Two episodes to respite.
Joe R is over it. He can be reached for lavish praise and nothing but at joseph.reid21@gmail.com, and you can listen to him yammer on to his heart's content on the Extra Hot Great podcast.