By Jacob
Just like happens in the back half of every season, the crew of the Galactica freak out and start eating each other the second they don't have anything to look forward to. Now that Laura's given up her cancer meds, she's literally running around the ship like a maniac, full of beans and wild oats and basically everything that is not poison. She also could care less that the Fleet is coming down around their ears, because girlfriend is done. Bill's at a loss watching all this go down, but she eventually convinces him that not only does she have every right in the world to spend her last days not barfing up poison, but he could stand to take a load off, too. And yes, they are frakking, and yes, it is super awesome.
Second only to this in awesomeness is the revelation that Hera is still the only Shape Of Things To Come, since Cally continues to suck hilariously from beyond the grave. Nicky's dad is actually Brendan "Hot Dog" Costanza, and not Galen at all, which means not only is he a weird-looking kid, but he can't even blame it on being half-Final Fiver. Galen doesn't get to give any more speeches about how she smelled like cabbage, but he does spend the entire time trying to reverse his pronouns and remember he's a Cylon and totally into doing Cylon shit and reading Cylon books and going to Cylon rock and roll shows, even though he's the least Cylony Cylon of all the Cylons.
Caprica and Saul's baby is coming along swimmingly, although a reminder that their child represents the future of the entire Cylon race doesn't sit well with Nurse Ishay. Which leads into Zarek, once again, pulling Jenga on the Fleet and trying to tear everything apart, because Zarek, once again, can feel the public pulse better than even Gaius Baltar, and knows that our friendship with the Cylons -- now that we're not getting anything out of it, like the Hub or Earth -- is suddenly offensive again. Then Lee fraks up and tells the fourth estate that they don't need to know who the Final Cylon is, because they don't know anything about the Final Cylon... And finishes up lamely saying "she's" dead anyway.
Zarek manages to get the Quorum on his side, and they pass some toaster-hating legislation, hamstringing Lee and bringing Bill into a place where he pretty much can't use military force to stop Zarek from stirring everybody up. So that's when he starts threatening Zarek with death and blackmail and whatnot, which kind of proves Zarek right.
Also down with toaster hateration is Felix Gaeta, who recently (we know from the webisodes) was forced to confront the fact that more of his fifth column activities in the New Caprica administration ended in the deaths of prominent Colonials than not. He tells Kara that he's going to kill her ass for no reason whatsoever, threatens the President and Admiral, and ends up starting a terrorist posse of his very own, shaking on it with Zarek and apparently intending to bring down the entirety of human civilization. I would hasten to remind you also that not only did he just lose his close friend Dee to the crushing existential dread that is life without parole, but he has always been a miserable little shit.
week, everybody continues to freak out except for Bill and Laura, who have invented Florida and moved there using the power of their minds. Oh, and Saul and Bill get blown all to hell.
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