Happy birthday to Johanna. Manuella, say hi to David for me.
The show opens with shiny disco Cary telepedeconferencing, insisting that "it'll be fabulous." His flunky -- who has a certain Corwinosity that may lead to his becoming my favorite character -- is holding another phone at the ready. Cary finishes the first call, grabs the other phone, and says that the person he just spoke to is "intrigued, but wants to know who's playing Tom Joad." After a moment, Cary reluctantly points out that Henry Fonda is dead, but offers to talk to the science department about that. As he reaches the lobby, he finishes the call, pauses to coo over Harmony, and then asks where Angel is. Harmony reports that Angel's on the way back from a mission, and that he sounds grumpy. How can you distinguish grumpy Angel from any other kind of Angel? Can you actually hear him smashing doors in the background when he calls? Cary is sure that he can perk Angel up, but then Angel squelches in, looking singed as well as slimed. Wesley pops over to ask Angel how the "neural-intercept grenade" worked. Angel says it didn't, and hands the dud back to Wesley. Wesley says he'll have Fred look at it. As Wesley heads away, Cary calls to him, "Have Fred pencil me in for later -- I've gotta talk to her about Henry Fonda's big comeback!" Then Cary chases after Angel, who is covered with goo. Ew, I think he was attacked by his own hair-care products. Oh, cruel fate! Cary wants to talk about a party, but Angel grumbles, "I'm exhausted. I'm covered head-to-toe in Thraxis blood -- which actually kinda burns -- so this is all gonna have to wait until after I take a shower." Cary gasps that Angel killed a Thraxis. Angel slams his office doors shut. Cary turns to his assistant and asks him to take the Thraxis off the guest list. I'm not sure whether he's uninviting the dead Thraxis because...well, Angel killed it, or if he's uninviting a different Thraxis because it might be mad at Angel. Or I guess maybe he's being respectful because it'll be in mourning.
As Cary heads for his own office, he reviews some of his flunky's work, and reads, "'Wolfram & Hart wants to be up your alley'? Sounds like a bus-station pick-up line!" He tells the flunky to clear out as he reaches his office. The door is covered with Post-Its and "While You Were Out" messages. Cary dismisses the assistant and enters the office, shutting off the disco soundtrack that has been playing all the while.
Cary's office, in addition to slightly more interesting generic furniture, contains a makeup chair and dressing-room mirror. Heh. Cary sits at the mirror and rests his head on his hand, exhausted. His mirror image turns to him and starts yapping. Er. Okay. Cary moans and rubs his head while his reflection observes, "That's an adult-sized bangaroo." I think that maybe, given what happens later, there's supposed to be a mark of some kind on Cary's head. I can't see anything unusual, though. Although it's hard to tell given that he's, y'know, green. Or maybe he's using the term "bangaroo" metaphorically. This teaser really confuses me on many levels. Like, is Cary's reflection actually talking to him, because that's a special demon thing that he can do? Or is it an odd thing that is happening because of this week's plot? If so, why isn't Cary more surprised by it? Or is it just a storytelling device and we shouldn't take it literally? Anyway, Cary's reflection tries to perk him up, and says that he needs to get back to work. The reflection insists, "They're gonna eat you up with a spoon because you're sooooo scrumptious!" At which point Cary freaks out and smashes the mirror. With a sigh, he stands up, and then the reflection starts singing "Don't Leave Me This Way." Cary heads for the door.
“ Eve points out that Angel can still kill monsters in his off hours. When is he supposed to sleep? Maybe he naps during Fred and Wesley's scenes. ”
And walks back out into the hall, on the phone, singing the chorus, as we go into the credits. Seriously, what the hell?
I almost think they should have kept doing "Don't Leave Me This Way" during the credits, because going from that to the Angel theme is...well, almost as jarring as the mirror bit was. Johanna says, "I don't think Cary should have layers." I agree, and say that it's really okay for Cary just to be fun. We don't need to delve into him. In fact, the last time they delved into Cary, we wound up in Pylea. And they added Fred. So let's just not. Here's another thing: given that they haven't found anything useful for Spicule to do, it seems like it would have been more efficient to have Cary talking to Spicule instead of to the mirror. Because that was pretty odd, and not in the good way. Spicule could do the "Hey, you seem tired" observations without really caring about the response, so if Cary brushed him off, it would still establish that something's wrong with Cary without changing anything later. Plus, maybe if Spicule had something to do that actually advanced the story in the teaser, they wouldn't need to insert him into later scenes for no reason.
In his dreadful apartment, Angel steps out of the shower and hears Eve say hi. Angel stares at her. Eve explains, "The door was open. Well, unlocked. Well, I had a key." Angel walks over to her, and holds out his hand. He's holding, but not wearing, a towel. Aieee. I know Eve's evil and everything, but that seems uncalled for. She hands over the key, which he tosses over onto a nightstand. As he finally ties the towel around his waist, Eve makes some single entendres about Angel's time in the shower. Angel keeps glaring at her, and asks what she wants, at which point she reminds him that they had a meeting scheduled that morning. Angel immediately looks guiltily flustered and quickly goes to get dressed. Why does he care? Are they going to fire him if he doesn't do a good job?
As Eve and Angel ride the elevator downstairs, Eve asks him how it's going. Angel isn't sure, and reminds her that the show FAQ explains terms like "MoG." Eve points out that Angel can still kill monsters in his off hours. When is he supposed to sleep? Maybe he naps during Fred and Wesley's scenes. Eve accuses Angel of bottling stuff up. Angel snaps that he doesn't "bottle." Eve says she does. The debate commences. I suddenly realize that Eve reminds me a lot of Buffy. Except Eve is slightly more sympathetic. Angel and Eve go on arguing about bottling until I start getting thirsty, and then the elevator doors open, revealing a giant skull. Angel automatically reacts by punching it, thus decking the guy carrying the giant Halloween decoration.
Angel realizes his mistake, and then looks around at the swarm of festive decorations in the lobby and asks what's going on. Cary arrives to explain that they are getting ready for the company's Halloween party, and that Angel should know all about it. Eve says that their meeting was supposed to be about the party. Cary pulls Angel aside and explains that none of the A-list guests are coming. Angel's fine with that. He explains that he's not keen on entertaining a bunch of evil-doers, and as he chatters, Cary starts rubbing his head, and tense music alerts us that Something Is Up. Cary finally interrupts to snap, "Can't you just feel up the big picture, Mr. Magoo?" He says it's not about good and evil, it's just a party, and then shouts, "I'm about to have a stroke here, 'cause you're killin' me!" Cary quickly calms down and claims that Angel's in a bad mood. Cary tucks a giant decorative flower into Angel's folded arms and suggests that they talk about it later. Angel, somewhat confused, says that's fine. Cary marches off and says they'll meet in Angel's office in twenty-five minutes.
In the lab, Fred's going with a frizzier hairstyle this week. She asks Wesley if Angel's angry about the dud grenade. Knox enters in order to exposition that the grenade is a "hand-held spell-casting robot," which means that I will lose my mind if they don't knock it off with the technobabble and the pseudo-sci-fi and if I wanted to watch Jake 2.0 I would, okay? The beauty of doing a fantasy show is that you don't have to explain how stuff works. So don't. Just stop it. Anyway, Wesley thinks that the trigger didn't work, and Fred and Knox both get huffy about this slight on their work. Wesley snits back at them, and Cary enters full of the holiday spirit. Wesley tells Knox that the spell was definitely correct, because he checked it. He says, "I got that knowing feeling you get when you know something." I'm not going to use this opportunity to pick on Wesley, only because I'd rather point out what a fun line that is. It's right up there with "Stand there in your wrongness and be wrong!"
Cary asks them to "put away [their] sci-fi toys for a little bit," and I add "or the rest of the season." He tries getting them excited about the party, but Fred admits that she didn't plan to attend. Cary asks Wesley if he hears this "crazy talk," and Wesley says he was going to skip it, too. Knox says that they should go, because it's a great party. He overshares, "Last year they took a bunch of cows and put them in a giant effigy of Krishna, doused it with Sambuca, and...anyway, it's a hell of a good time." Well, that's pretty darn sacrilegious. Nice job! I mean, no offense or anything. I'm just admiring the craftsmanship. Speaking of things I don't really need a lot of email about: I know Lilah said that Satan killed everyone at Wolfram & Hart and that if that's true, Knox and the other employees shouldn't remember last year's party. I honestly don't care at all, so see the poll at right. Where were we? Fred says she'd rather skip the party to work on the grenade. Wesley quickly offers to stay as well, and creepily whispers, "I'm sure we can work it out together." I feel so sorry for the actors sometimes. Sometimes I feel sorry for the writers, too. But most of all, I feel sorry for me. Cary shouts "No!" repeatedly and says they both need to have fun, then asks if someone else could fix the grenade. Knox finally says he'll do it, and tries to placate Wesley by saying, "It's probably the trigger mechanism anyway." A satisfied Cary says he'll see them in Angel's office in fifteen minutes. Wesley's shirt looks as if it's quilted. I don't understand that.
“ Harmony hands the mug over saying, 'Here's your blood, bossy. Boss.' There's a definite cow theme here. You know why? Because cows are funny. ”
Gunn, on the other hand, is looking fine in a maroon shirt and gold tie. Cary enters his office and quickly explains that they have to get Angel excited about the party, and then gives Gunn a pep talk. Cary says, "I want you to stake out your territory, and I want you to keep it staked." Gunn, completely confused, says he'll get to that, but that he's busy at the moment. Cary accepts that, and as he exits, tells Gunn to be in Angel's office in ten minutes.
In Angel's office, everyone but Cary is silently waiting. Including Spicule. Why? Was he invited? Is he just stalking Fred now? Because she's got enough of that already. Spicule starts whining that Halloween is no time for demons to be afoot. Oh, he's there to complain about everything he can think of. Again. Shut up, Spicule. Cary enters, chatting on the phone in Italian. Spicule immediately heads for the door, and then Cary step back and forth, trying to dodge each other, before Spicule finally exits because his purpose in the scene has been accomplished. What purpose, you ask? Well, yes, exactly.
Cary hangs up and asks what he missed. Angel sniffs, "Us. Waiting." Cary apologizes, and then tells Angel that they all wanted to tell him how important this party is. Gunn takes Cary's side, and says that the party will show the demonic types that "the new regime is here to stay," and that if the party isn't a success, they'll lose face. Cary chimes in, "Believe me, Milk Dud, speaking as the head of your PR department, we need all the face we can get." He's head of the PR department? Oh. I thought he...and does a law firm even...plus, how does that...eh, never mind. It's not worth it. Angel repeats, "'Milk Dud'?" and Cary quickly says, "Said with affection!" Heh. Angel reminds Cary that their guests will be evil, and that they might have grudges with the MoG, or with each other. Cary in turn points out that he has some experience with these kinds of mixers, adding that it's not necessary to sign your posts on TWoP, because your login name appears to the left of your message. Eve spews some nonsense about "ethical tightropes," and then mentions employee morale as Harmony enters with a fresh mug o' blood for Angel. Harmony hands the mug over saying, "Here's your blood, bossy. Boss." There's a definite cow theme here. You know why? Because cows are funny. Eve says that the party is important for morale, because Halloween is like Christmas for their employees. Harmony agrees that company morale is in the toilet: "They're all worried that you're gonna axe them, or, y'know, axe them." Which is no different from the way things worked when evil people ran the place, so I'm not sure why that's a big deal. Cary says it's Angel's fault that people are declining the party invitation. Angel asks, "They think I'm throwing this thing so I can slaughter them?" Beat. I kind of expected that Angel would go on to say, "Hey, that's not a bad idea..." but no, he just gives in and tells Cary that he won't get in the way of the party. Cary's not satisfied with that; he wants Angel to actively help make the party a success. Angel asks what he's supposed to do.
Cut to Angel and Cary riding in a limo. Cary is fixing a drink while explaining that they're on their way to visit Archduke Sebassis, "bona fide nobility from the fiery down under." He says that if they convince Sebassis to come to the party, everyone else will fall in line. Angel quietly observes, "This really matters to you, doesn't it?" Cary starts to agree that it's a big deal for the company, but Angel repeats, "This really matters to you. Personally." Aw. Angel is a nice friend. Dumb as a post, but he means well. Cary awkwardly explains that he's part of Angel's team, but he doesn't have anything special to offer for their usual battles, and I shout, "That's okay, neither does Wesley," and so this is his way of helping. Then they arrive at Sebassis's, and Cary tells Angel that he'll do the talking: "You just kind of smile and try not to rip anybody apart, 'kay?"
"So, this is the mighty Angel," Sebassis says. Sebassis is a bald demon with pointy ears and antelope horns. He's seated on a throne with a couple of minions standing nearby, while Cary and Angel have taken seats facing him, which seems a little weird, because if you're in a room with someone who merits a throne, I think Miss Manners would say that you should just remain standing. But maybe Sebassis has a casual style. That's cool of him. Sebassis describes Angel as "a restless frog, making lots of waves in your little swamp." Something about calling Angel a "restless frog" entertains me. It sounds like that might be his Indian name. Angel makes some tense quips, and Sebassis finally observes, "Your contempt is fragrant." Then he chugs a blue drink and holds his glass to one side. A skinny little fiend steps forward, wearing a slave collar and looking pale. The slave pulls a cork out of its wrist, and sprays some blue fluid out of the hole into the glass. Oh, he's not a slave; he's a carafiend. The squeak-pop of the cork coming out is definitely the funniest part. Also the grossest. It's both. Ew. Cary mentions how disappointed they were that Sebassis declined the party invitation. Then he slaps Angel's arm, prompting Angel to agree, "A party just isn't a party without the Archduke!" Sebassis offers Angel some blue blood, and when Angel declines, sighs, "That's right -- you choose to drink the blood of swine. Filthy beasts." Angel starts to defend the pigs' reputation, but Cary quickly sides with Sebassis and drinks his own glass of blue blood. He tells the slave, "You taste great." The slave stares at him without emotion. Sebassis finally agrees to attend the party, and Cary happily hops to his feet and leads Angel out.
Once Angel and Cary are gone, a minion tells Sebassis that he thinks the party is a trap. Sebassis says, "Maybe, Artode, but I am in the mood for intrigue." He adds that they'll have to dress for the party, and then waves his hand, causing a wall full of weapons to be revealed.
“ Fred tells Wesley that she never knows how to behave at parties. Until she finds her way to the attic, where all the stoners are hanging out. She doesn't say that part, but it seems like a safe bet. ”
Commercials. Incidentally, I've decided that any generic Wolfram & Hart employee will be called a "suit." (Unless they're wearing masks, which makes them ninja.) I figured that it had the advantage of being existing slang, plus it's the simplest equivalent to something like "red shirts" for Enterprise. I decided I should explain since, with this show, it wouldn't be unreasonable to think that maybe someone is talking to a giant animated suit.
The party is in full swing as "Don't Leave Me This Way" plays and Harmony discos all by her lonesome. A suit (see?) tells his friend, "This is lame." Well, yeah. Because nobody is wearing a costume! What the hell? I could accept the demons not wearing costumes, but the people should be all decked out! Oh, maybe the people don't wear costumes because, when there are actual demons around, it's sort of rude to dress up as one. But they could wear other kinds of costumes! Grumble. I wanted costumes. Anyway, the suit goes on about how it's not a real party without a ritual sacrifice. Cary strolls over and encourages the two suits to mingle, mostly by growling, "Mingle! Mingle, mingle, mingle!" They take the hint.
A demon bops over toward Cary. This guy's wearing a costume, so I like him. In fact, he's dressed as a human: argyle sweater, Dockers, and a human face that's stretched taut over his own head and hooked over his horns. Heh. The demon chuckles and shows off his impression of a person by grunting, "I proud my honor roll student!" Cary laughs along with the demon, albeit less sincerely.
Wesley and Fred are lurking by the snack table. Wesley pulls at a beer while Fred marvels at Cary's social skills.
Cary nervously asks, "So, that mask -- it is rubber, right?" The demon replies, "My other car a Lamborghini," and chuckles some more. Cary even more nervously tells the demon to "be good," and quickly sidles away.
Fred tells Wesley that she never knows how to behave at parties. Until she finds her way to the attic, where all the stoners are hanging out. She doesn't say that part, but it seems like a safe bet. Cary joins Wesley and Fred and asks for help, pointing out that Harmony is the only one on the dance floor. He turns and calls, "You keep pushing the envelope, baby!" at her. She preens and continues bopping around. Wesley tells Cary that this isn't their kind of scene. Cary insists, "You're the young, the beautiful, the ready-to....Oh, here's one problem: You're totally sober!" He tells them that it's a party and that they should be trashed by now, and asks them to "get into the spirit of things" before marching off.
“ Spicule bitches and moans for a while, and then Harmony shows a moment of intelligence when she asks, 'What are you even doing here, then?' Even more intelligently, she turns and leaves without waiting for an answer. ”
Angel's sitting at his desk when Cary enters and insists that the guests want to meet him. Wow, that's a nice desk. It's huge. Has that always been his desk? I didn't notice it had an angled thing going on. Angel explains to Cary, "Look...I have things." I didn't really catch it originally, but on review his delivery there amuses me. He's clearly trying to think of a lie, but he can't, so he just says he has "things." Hee. Angel insists that he's busy, while Cary looks around pointedly at the lack of any open work on the desk. Angel finally claims, "I'm brooding." Cary turns and sees a television behind him, and then spins back to Angel, gasping, "Oh, you're watching hockey!?" Angel retorts, "Yeah, but my team is losing!" Cary loses it, saying that he can't do this by himself, and then clutches his forehead. Angel stands up, seeing that Cary is unusually distressed, but then Cary perks up and just says, "Let's boogie, Sweet-Tart."
Cary leads Angel out through the lobby, pointing out various demons. They walk past the camera, leaving us to watch Harmony twirling on the now-crowded dance floor. I like the giant-faced monster dancing with a woman in a business suit behind Harmony. Harmony spots Spicule staring at the crowd, and goes over to him. She asks him to dance, but he insists, "I'll go to hell before these ghost shoes touch that dance floor." Spicule bitches and moans for a while, and then Harmony shows a moment of intelligence when she asks, "What are you even doing here, then?" Even more intelligently, she turns and leaves without waiting for an answer. Spicule moves on, repeating, "What am I doing here?" He promptly runs into Angel, who has the same question in mind. Spicule says he could ask Angel the same question, but I know why Angel's there. I don't know why Spicule is. Cary proudly says, "[Angel has] already not-killed, like, a hundred guests!" Spicule says it isn't necessary to kill anyone, since "the party's already dead." Cary calmly asks if it would kill Spicule to be more positive. Any sentence that includes "kill" and "Spicule" tends to make me feel positive. Then they all turn as Sebassis enters with a number of minions and his carafiend. Everyone nearby begins groveling. Cary sends Angel over to Sebassis, begging him to be nice.
Sebassis tells the many people bending to kiss his ring, "Sycophants. Worms. Don't writhe all at once." I like him. Angel walks over and begins heartily shaking Sebassis's hand, thanking him for coming to the party. Meanwhile, Cary greets the chief minion, Artode, and admires his green jacket. Artode explains that it's Pylean. Cary unenthuses, "Oh, made in Pylea." Artode clarifies, for the three people who didn't see it coming, "Not made in. Made from." He adds that he skinned it himself, and asks if it's anyone Cary knows. Cary fake-laughs and says "Thanks for dropping by" through clenched teeth before beating a hasty retreat. Angel is still shaking Sebassis's hand, and gibbering, "I don't have to tell you how awesome you look. You know how awesome you look!" Cary detaches Sebassis from Angel, who's really getting into the glad-handing, and leads him away.