This week, the girls share their deepest fears-slash-sob-stories, and also face death by bees. First, we learn a little about the tragic pasts that we missed out on with the truncated casting week. Molly is adopted, loves her churchy-looking parents, and feels bad about being a terror in high school. Ondrei has two brothers who have died -- one in a car accident, and one who was murdered only months ago. The others initially see her as unemotional about it, but really it's all just waiting to come out at an inopportune time. Nicole's tragedy is that she looks old on film.
Tyra visits the house in a chef's hat, with nutritionist Heather Bauer in tow. Tyra speaks in a terrifying French accent while she and Heather talk about "cheaties" -- i.e. bad-for-you meals that you can eat once in a while. They blindfold the girls and make them taste two dishes and guess which is the healthiest. Basically they have to choose between two crap foods. The moral of the story is that it's totally okay to eat spaghetti and meatballs AFTER your photo shoot. Monique is grateful to Tyra for empowering women who love pasta.
The kitchen wars start early this season, and center around raw chicken in a cereal bowl. This is Aleandria's chicken, and it's apparently been in the fridge for days. Dalya gives her a talk about fridge versus freezer, to which Alexandria defensively yells, "I know about chicken!" A simmering rivalry ensues. Jaclyn, who is totally scared of Alexandria, keeps her opinions about chicken to herself.
The girls head to a theater for a performance challenge, where Nigel introduces them to Eugene Buica, director of The Acting Corps. And if you've ever wanted to be theatrically trained by a young David Gest, this is the guy for you. Eugene talks about the inner critic who can take even the greatest creative genius down, and then has the girls draw their critics on chart paper. One by one, the girls face off with Eugene, in the role of the inner critic, and try to convince him to go away. Holly's inner critic tells her that she was unwanted, while Nicole's inner critic has crazy eyebrows, just like her. Jaclyn takes on her inner critic's caustic remarks about her baby face and high voice, and Alexandria rightfully laughs from the audience. Ondrei's inner critic tells her that her brothers have died, which is of course actually true. She quite sadly breaks down, which puts all the other girls in a tearful state as well. To paraphrase Jaclyn, they went through heck. Once she's home, Ondrei starts to question whether she's emotionally ready to be in the competition.
For this week's photo shoot, the girls do a beauty shot with bees. Yes, bees. Smize, everybody! To make it worse, they wear jewelry covered in pheromones to attract the bees. Jaclyn is allergic, but doesn't seem all that concerned about it. Modeling is pain and near-death experience, people. Deal with it. Everyone gets bees all up in their grille, some with more success than others. Alek Wek is guest judge at panel, and she and the others love Hannah's teary photo, caused by a breakdown on set. Her ability to spin her inconvenient emotions into photographic gold gets her the best picture of the week. Ondrei tells Tyra and the judges that she's realized she wants to go home, and she's released without too much ado. Sadly for the others, Ondrei's picture wasn't the worst of the week and so someone else must be eliminated. Nicole and Dalya land in the bottom two, and it's Nicole's old-looking self that gets sent back to the nursing home.
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Previously on ANTM: Tyra and the Jays faked out the final fourteen contestants by telling them they were cut at semi-finals, when in fact they were actually standing in their new model apartment. What became of the poor losers who thought they made it to the round but were actually cut, we may never know. Perhaps one or two will show up as a Charlie Sheen goddess. And then, in a pinnacle of sorts for all televisual media, the girls walked on a 12-inch runway over a swimming pool while encased in a human-sized, glitter-filled hamster ball. No one ran out of oxygen, sadly, but a few girls fell off of the runway and into the water and had to spin around aimlessly as a live audience laughed at them. Angelia was unremarkable and thus was the first to be cut. Thirteen bitches remain!
It is night at the Top Model house, and the girls arrive home to find Molly's best-of-week photo displayed as digital art. I thought that her victory would go far toward reminding me that she exists, but I'm sad to say that wasn't the case. Molly tells us that she's adopted, and we see a photo of her with her very wholesome-looking parents. She owes her parents a lot, she says. Though frankly if she'd grown up totally in the foster system, or better yet as a motherless street urchin, she'd probably get more screen time. Meanwhile, Alexandria sees fit to give Nicole a talking to. She tells Nicole that she was standing up there like a dumpy dope expecting to get cut. time, she should display a level of obnoxious, false confidence. Nicole reminds us about how Tyra told her that she looked a good fifteen years older in her photos. Her priority for this week is to look more youthful. What do you do for that? Wear pigtails? Hold one of those giant lollipops? It's a conundrum.
Meanwhile, Ondrei and Dominique eat pizza and chat about tragic situations. Dominique asks if Ondrei has any siblings, and Ondrei says she had two brothers who died. One was in a car crash, and another was murdered. And not only was he murdered, but he was murdered the night before her prom. Ondrei interviews that no one could get over such a tragic event. At the same time, she says, it made her even more eager to be on the show and do something big with her life. Dominique and Dalya express their surprise that Ondrei is even there only a few months after the murder, which seems a bit callous of them. Dalya is frightened by Ondrei's composure in the face of tragedy. I am frightened by Dalya's jaw. Shut up, Dalya.
Nicole is up , facing off against her big-eyebrowed, red-eyed inner critic. She tearfully tells her inner critic that she is good enough to be a model, and doesn't give a damn what the inner critic thinks of her. The inner critic thinks she should invest in a pair of tweezers. Oh wait, that's the outer critic. And then we have the greatest moment of all time, which is Jaclyn facing off against her inner critic, who is also improbably adorable despite not actually having a fully-formed face. Through sobs she yells, "You think you can't model because you have a baby face! And because people tell you your voice is too high! But you can do anything you want to do!" She is literally shaking as she has this face-off. This baby-face off. Jaclyn has struggles, people. You try growing up with three extra fat cells in your cheeks. From the audience Alexandria laughs, which brings her up a notch or two in my estimation.
is Ondrei, whose inner critic looks like a devil with Nicole's eyebrows. She tells her inner critic that she's had to listen to him/her all her life. She's had to listen to voices in her head and suffer through nightmares since her brother died, she says, and it's all because of her inner critic. Ondrei's inner critic murdered her brother? That's some Inception shit right there. Ondrei cries for real as she yells out that the men in her life who were supposed to be here for this moment are dead. She asks what she's supposed to do. Most of the other girls are crying now, too. It's a very emotional moment, and I guess we should just be glad that Ondrei didn't have to have it in a giant hamster ball. Ondrei interviews that the challenge was uncomfortable for her, because she didn't expect to go that deep into her emotions.
Nigel gathers the girls together and says that though this was a painful routine, it exposes who they really are so the camera can capture their humanity. If they hide their humanity, he says, they'll be just another pretty face. It's their stories that make them special, and TV-worthy. Nicole tells us that the experience was cathartic, and she really did work through her problems. Why get a therapist when you could have an acting coach? Nigel says that since the girls all did such a good job, J. Estina jewelers is gifting each of them a beautiful pair of earrings. Jaclyn is very excited about the earrings, and thinks they all deserve it because they've been through heck. You want to talk about heck? I've been recapping this show for thirteen seasons. Where's my free jewelry?
The morning, Dominique shows off her model's diet, which involves a lot of Cup O'Noodles. On cue, Tyra arrives in an apron and chef's hat, along with another lady in an apron and chef's hat. Her name is Heather Bauer, and she's a nutritionist. Because she lives to terrorize us all, Tyra speaks in an exaggerated French accent throughout this whole segment. Sara gets nervous that Tyra is in their dirty-ass kitchen, I'm sure because she thinks Tyra will eat everything within. Tyra explains that there are foods that people think you should never eat, because they're fatty or bad for you. And so people choose other things to eat. But why eat those other things when you could eat the fatty, bad-for-you ones? It is through this logic that nutritionist Heather came up with the concept of "cheaties." Cheaties are things that seem bad but aren't, and which allow you to indulge without guilt, or so Tyra claims. Really the message of this segment is that you can eat pasta once in a while and it won't kill you.
Taking a cue from The Biggest Loser, Tyra blindfolds the girls and has them taste two different dishes and guess which is healthier. First, Alexandria has to choose between spaghetti with meatballs and eggplant parmesan. Alexandria guesses eggplant, likely assuming that vegetables are always the healthy option, but in fact eggplant soaks up a lot of oil, particularly when fried. The spaghetti and meatballs is actually better for you. And iron keeps your hair healthy! I shall look at my rusty hot water with new eyes now. , Kasia has to guess if a wheat waffle with peanut butter is healthier than a wheat bagel with cream cheese. And duh. A bagel with cream cheese never wins in these comparisons. Per usual, America's Top Model has taught you nothing about health and wellness. Monique, who I think might have the lowest IQ of this bunch based on purely circumstantial evidence and the way she talks, appreciates how Tyra empowers women (!!!!) and notes that it's much more important to be healthy than be skinny. Unless you're a model. Seriously. I mean, nobody likes a model that's near-death, but other than that where you fall on the health spectrum really isn't of concern to anyone as long as you can fit in a sample size.
After Tyra leaves, Jaclyn and Monique are looking through the fridge when they detect something foul. And something fowl! See what I did there? It's raw chicken marinating in barbeque sauce. It's in a plastic bowl covered in tinfoil, and apparently has been there for days. Monique puts the bowl out on the counter, and Alexandria comes down and says it was supposed to be in the fridge. Alexandria would try to give everyone else in the house a bacterial infection. Dalya gets in the action, telling Alexandria that if you're not going to eat your raw chicken, it needs to be put in a freezer bag, and then in the freezer. If this were The Biggest Loser we would get some loving porn shots of Zip-Loc bags right now. Alexandria requests that Dalya not talk to her that way, and then exclaims, "I don't need a lesson about chicken." Dalya disagrees, and says that raw chicken does not belong in a bowl from which other people eat cereal. She does have a point there. Salmonella Toast Crunch is not on anybody's list of breakfast treats. Alexandria retorts, "I know about chicken." A bit sensitive about her chicken expertise, isn't she? Calm down, motherclucker.
For some reason Eugene starts to pick on Nicole, who looks nervous. He asks if she's a polite young lady who wants everyone to like her and avoids conflict. The answer to all of those questions is: yes. He tells her that acting, performing, and modeling is about having the courage to get into conflict. Alexandria nods, thinking she's got this challenge wrapped up. Eugene asks the girls to think about the one thing they love more than anything in this world. Molly instantly names her parents, and says that it took her a while to realize how awesome they are and how much they've supported her. Meeting her birth mother really solidified her thinking about how good she has it, and made her feel bad for putting her adoptive parents through hell when she was in high school. Molly interviews that she understands why her birth mother put her up for adoption, and is glad that she did, but on some subconscious level the child inside of her doesn't get it. I think she should be glad that she at least has a quasi-tragic tale, albeit one that's not particularly dramatic. It sure is taking up a lot of screen time.
There are easels with chart paper on the stage, and the girls are instructed to draw pictures of their inner critics. Nigel says "drawrings" like Simon in the bathtub. I think we can all safely say that Nigel is a bum-looker. Nicole's inner critic looks just like her, which is to say a big round frowny face with giant eyebrows. Her inner critic, which is to say herself, always tells her that she's never going to be good enough. Nicole's inner critic is going to be totally vindicated at the end of this episode.
Once the drawing session is over, Eugene tells them that it's time to expose their fears. They'll come up on stage, display the drawing, and then face off against their inner critics. The part of each inner critic will be played by one Master Thespian Eugene Buica in the role of a lifetime! The girls are supposed to tell Eugene, in his role as inner critic, why he should go away and stop impeding their progress. Molly is up first, and tells her inner critic to stop thinking that she's unwanted just because her mother gave her away. Eugene Buica, in the role of inner critic slash biological mother, says, "I did give you away." Apparently his acting prowess is much more compelling in person, because Molly cries and tells her inner critic slash biological mother that she had to. She also tells her inner critic, who I think is no longer her biological mother, to go away. Molly understands the point of this exercise, which makes one of us.
Nicole is up , facing off against her big-eyebrowed, red-eyed inner critic. She tearfully tells her inner critic that she is good enough to be a model, and doesn't give a damn what the inner critic thinks of her. The inner critic thinks she should invest in a pair of tweezers. Oh wait, that's the outer critic. And then we have the greatest moment of all time, which is Jaclyn facing off against her inner critic, who is also improbably adorable despite not actually having a fully-formed face. Through sobs she yells, "You think you can't model because you have a baby face! And because people tell you your voice is too high! But you can do anything you want to do!" She is literally shaking as she has this face-off. This baby-face off. Jaclyn has struggles, people. You try growing up with three extra fat cells in your cheeks. From the audience Alexandria laughs, which brings her up a notch or two in my estimation.
is Ondrei, whose inner critic looks like a devil with Nicole's eyebrows. She tells her inner critic that she's had to listen to him/her all her life. She's had to listen to voices in her head and suffer through nightmares since her brother died, she says, and it's all because of her inner critic. Ondrei's inner critic murdered her brother? That's some Inception shit right there. Ondrei cries for real as she yells out that the men in her life who were supposed to be here for this moment are dead. She asks what she's supposed to do. Most of the other girls are crying now, too. It's a very emotional moment, and I guess we should just be glad that Ondrei didn't have to have it in a giant hamster ball. Ondrei interviews that the challenge was uncomfortable for her, because she didn't expect to go that deep into her emotions.
Nigel gathers the girls together and says that though this was a painful routine, it exposes who they really are so the camera can capture their humanity. If they hide their humanity, he says, they'll be just another pretty face. It's their stories that make them special, and TV-worthy. Nicole tells us that the experience was cathartic, and she really did work through her problems. Why get a therapist when you could have an acting coach? Nigel says that since the girls all did such a good job, J. Estina jewelers is gifting each of them a beautiful pair of earrings. Jaclyn is very excited about the earrings, and thinks they all deserve it because they've been through heck. You want to talk about heck? I've been recapping this show for thirteen seasons. Where's my free jewelry?
Back at the house, the girls talk about the challenge experience. Dalya says it hurts to talk about stuff like that. In a tearful interview, she tells us that this is her first time being away from her family to such an extent, and that being independent and living with other people and growing is the best feeling ever. Then why is she crying? Maybe because she's afraid of being 25 and still living with her parents, or maybe she just flashed back to the raw chicken.
Ondrei confessionalizes that this has been a tough day, and she's a little overwhelmed. She's thinking about whether or not she really wants to be there. Ondrei calls her boyfriend and cries. She says she's stressed, and that her brother's death has been brought up a lot. She thought that she could deal with it, but she can't. Her boyfriend says that whatever decision she makes, everyone is going to stand behind her. As Ondrei lets out a big sigh and ponders if her mental health is worth the cost of not being America's Top Model, we head to commercials.
When we return, the girls head to their photo shoot as Smashbox Studios. They are greeted by Jay Manuel, who says that the fashion industry is constantly abuzz creating dynamic imagery for high-fashion editorial advertising. And sometimes you have to do something drastic to excite people to buy a product. For today's photo shoot, the girls will be working with some of the busiest bees in the business. And by business he means buzz-iness. And by bees he means bees. BEES! We see them swarming and making their honey or trying to copulate with the queen or whatever bees do in captivity. This is just the latest in Top Model's scheme to try to murder someone in the most gruesome way possible. The girls will be wearing jewelry covered in pheromones that will attract bees. Jay tells them to stay calm through all of it, otherwise, the bees will sting them to death. The photographer for the day is Mike Rosenthal.
The girls head back into makeup, and a shaky Hannah tells us that there are so many fabulous girls there. It makes the competition harder, because she's comparing herself to others in a destructive way. Baby-faced Jaclyn calmly tells us that she's allergic to bees. She swells up and then gets big red welts on her arms. She doesn't mention that her throat in particular swells, so maybe the allergy is not that bad. Let's hope that Jay is wielding an Epi-pen just in case. As someone who has a severe food allergy, let me tell you that having your throat swell up is not as glamorous as it sounds. I do know what I would look like with crazy collagen lips, though. Jaclyn contends that she's more nervous about getting a good picture than about dying from a bee sting. Jay tells the girls that they'll have cotton in their ears and noses so the bees don't get all up in there. This means that they will have to breathe through their mouth, which in turn means that someone could become the young lady who swallowed a bee. And from there it's really a downward spiral. Make-up artist Vincent Oquendo gets to do the nose-plugging honors. I bet Sutan is glad that he chose this particular season to appear on Drag Race.
Monique is first in front of the camera, and tells us that having bees crawl all over you is a really creepy feeling. Bees are totally in her tube top and living it up in her cleavage. I don't know how these girls are getting through this, or how no one gets stung throughout this whole shoot. Jay loves Monique's photos. Kasia is , working her bee covered earrings. The bees are crawling everywhere, including by her eyes. This can't be good. Sara is , and Jay says he senses that she's not comfortable in her own skin. Given that her skin is covered in bees, I can't really blame her. Nicole is and says that she thinks the inner critic exercise will help her with her photo shoot. Sadly for Nicole, even the bees really aren't all that interested in her. They want nothing to do with her face or her boobs. Jay tells us that Nicole's performance was lackluster and boring.
Mikaela is and seems to perform well under duress. Dominique has pheromone-covered headband upon which bees swarm, making her look like some sort of freckled queen of the damned. She was in the bottom two last week, and so is quite nervous. She tries to relax, which must be hard when you have a headband full of bees. Hannah also gets the headband, and struggles to figure out how to pose. As Jay asks who she drew during the inner critic exercise, Hannah starts to cry. She tells us that she was freaking out. Monique interviews that Hannah was a sobbing mess, crying her eyes out, and was generally pathetic. This display irritated Monique. Imagine how irritated Monique will be when Hannah gets best photo of the week! Jay has a small bee-gasm over the tearful posing.
is Alexandria, who would be covered in stings if karma were real. Molly feels pressure since she had the best photo from last week, and so starts off a bit awkwardly. Jay tells her not to try so hard, and she improves. Dalya is , and tells us that she got into a bee-free zone, mentally. She focuses on trying to pump some life into her dead eyes. Alexandria's assessment is that Dalya was timid at first, which made her look like she didn't know what she was doing. She thinks Dalya is lame, and also self-righteous about chicken, and wants her to go home. we have Jaclyn, who asks if she's working with killer bees. Aren't all bees killer bees to her? She seems to do fine, and does not, in fact, die. Nice try though, show. Brittani is , and Jay tells us that she's a consummate professional. She has intensity, is fearless, and stares at the camera. Basically, she knows how to work it. Then there's poor Ondrei. Jay tells us that Ondrei has a very striking look, but her performance fell totally flat. He tells her that the wall that she worked so hard to let down this week is back up, and it's really disappointing. I say good for her for finding her inner mason and refusing to let these bitches exploit her anymore.
Back at home, there is Tyra Mail. Someone is going home. Ondrei talks to a few of the other girls and says that though she wants to be there, she's not actually ready to be there. She interviews that she was unaware of a lot of things when she came into this competition, and she put herself in a position that she wasn't ready for. I bet she means that she didn't think the show would be quite so callous as to exploit a very raw personal tragedy, which makes me wonder if she even owns a TV. Monique, who is really a model of sympathy and kindheartedness, interviews that Ondrei should have had a clue that she couldn't handle this, and should just go because no one wants her to take up a spot when she doesn't want it. As Ondrei considers her options, we head to commercials.
When we return, we are treated to a bit of backstage panel madness, which entails ALT wanting to rip on Tyra's questionable shoe choice but being too polite to do so full-on. Turns out Tyra has a plane to catch and is just getting dressed on set. I don't know why one thing would lead to another in that case, but all right. Also, she tells ALT in no uncertain terms that he should annihilate her for wearing cutesy flats if this ever happens again in the future. I think that's solid advice. The girls enter. There are prizes, there are judges. ALT is still wearing that feather duster thing in his chapeau. Supermodel Alek Wek is the guest judge. She was discovered at a town fair, and remains way too fabulous for her own good and ours.
Tyra announces that the focus this week was on beauty shots, which have nothing to do with being beautiful but are really just shots of your big ol' head. Additionally, the girls were shot with bees, which Nigel says is bee-tiful. Nigel, that would be bee-eautiful. Ondrei is the first to go before the judges. Tyra asks how the shoot was for her. Ondrei admits that it didn't go so well, and that she didn't give her 100% all because she's not 100% herself. She's aware that she's lucky to be there, but doesn't feel right being in the competition when she's going through such a tough time in her life. Ondrei says that she thought she was strong enough to handle it, but she can't right now. She wants to go home. Now, usually when this sort of thing happens, Tyra eviscerates the traitorous girl like an earthworm with her words, but in this case you just can't be mad at poor Ondrei. Nigel tells her that they know her situation is unique, and that she's gone through a tough time, and wishes her luck. Tyra tells everyone that the judges will still evaluate Ondrei's photo. If it's the worst photo of the week there will be no elimination. However, if it's NOT the worst photo of the week, someone else will be sent home. Alexandria acts like she's nice for a minute to win favor with the judges, and then Ondrei leaves.
Kasia is to go before the judges, and is told to take off her belt as it's too much fashion. She does so gleefully, and Nigel suspects that she's set the whole thing up just to show off how cute she is. It was a pretty easy fix as far as panel sartorial choices go. Kasia's photo pops up, and Nigel calls it stunning and beautiful. The one super-crunk thing about some of these photos, I mean aside from the fact that the models have bees crawling all over them, is that their real eyebrows were covered in makeup, and then thin evil eyebrows were drawn on, but in some of the photos you can still totally see their real eyebrows under the drawn-on ones. I guess the budget for a Photoshop professional was limited, and so some girls got lucky while others didn't. Alek loves the bee placement in Kasia's photo, which is really more of a compliment to the bees, and ALT says he's always looking for the convergence of fashion and art.
Mikaela is up , and her photo is striking with great eye contact. ALT is a fan, and says that Mikaela's sense of calm is really stunning. Tyra tells Mikaela that she had serious dead eyes in her film, except for this picture. She has real power in her face and just has to let it go, and also to stop having a lazy eye. up is Dominique. ALT says that it's an elegant photograph, and Dominique's hands look great. Tyra agrees that it's quite stunning, but adds that unfortunately Dominique's entire film was not so stunning. She needs to be in control of her face, and work with the light. Brittani is up . Nigel says that her photo is interesting, unusual and different. Alek agrees that it's definitely strong. I don't know. I think Brittany just looks undernourished or something. Tyra tells Brittany that she has focus, and not to lose it.
we have Jaclyn, who looks very cheerful despite her internal battle with her own baby face. Her photo is pretty good. Nigel tells her that she has a beautiful profile, but her hand placement is a bit awkward. ALT agrees. Now, Jaclyn's eyebrows HAVE been totally Photoshopped out on the photo that we see in close-up, but then when we pan back to see the full panel with the photo displayed above them, here eyebrows are there full-on, without even any makeup on them. How are we to believe anything that we see on this show? I bet that wasn't even raw chicken in that cereal bowl.
Dalya is in front of the judges, and in her picture her eyes are closed. Tyra explains that she chose this picture because in every picture where Dalya had her eyes open, she looked crazy. Nigel tells her to use the old trick of keeping your eyes closed and then flicking them open momentarily, so that the photographer can get something worth using. Dalya tries to act charming about the whole situation, and Alexandria just wants to punch her in her dead eyes. Speaking of Alexandria, she's . Nigel says her photo is striking, like an ice queen with bee minions. Her eyebrows are gone in the close-up as well. Her photo is unique and that's important. Alek agrees, and says that the photo is bam! Full on. Tyra likes it, but says that Alexandria needs more intensity in her eyes.
Sara is , with full-on eyebrows in her photo. This is an instance where the Photoshop really would have benefitted her. ALT wishes there was more strength in the photograph. Sara is interesting in front of them, but he doesn't feel the impact of beauty in the photo. Nigel tells Sara that she has a very unique beauty to her, and has to own it and believe in it. Looks like somebody missed an opportunity to work out some real issues with their inner critic. Molly is . Alek thinks she looks like a warrior, but her neck is squat and should be elongated. Funny, now that no one is saying the words "no-neck monster" I kind of miss them. Nigel says the photo is neither here nor there. It's bland, and not powerful.
is Nicole. She says that the bees felt tickly crawling all over her, but then she just thought of them as mosquitos and everything was fine. How...odd. Nigel thinks that Nicole looks older in her picture, but still beautiful. Alek agrees, saying that she's much younger in person than she looks in the photograph. This is the second week in a row that Nicole has looked like the last surviving member of The Golden Girls, and Tyra tells her to soften every bone in her face to look her age in photos. How do you soften your bones? Drink less milk? Nicole looks discouraged. Hannah is up , and Nigel calls her a poor thing upon seeing her tear-stained face in her photo. Hannah explains that she wasn't crying because of the bees, but rather because she had a wall when she went on set. Nigel says that things happen and you have to go with it. If you're crying and miserable you should emote it, because you give the photographer the opportunity to catch magic. Is Nigel even a photographer anymore? Isn't "judge on America's Top Model" pretty much his only resume entry at this point? ALT says that Hannah's neck and hands saved her. The photo is beautiful, and reminds him of a prima ballerina. Tyra also thinks the photo is stunning, because they can feel her insides come to the outside.
Finally, there's Monique. Her eyebrows have been Photoshopped too, and ALT says that she has Shanghai gesture and has hijacked it. I don't know what this means, except for maybe that Monique looks vaguely Asian in her photo. She looks, and I quote, "Like some fabulous woman from the Shanghai, fabulous life of the Shanghai, of the other day, when you were in Shanghai." Got it? Tyra says the photo is strong, and that she looks evil but that's okay. Emoting evil is better than not emoting anything. Alek Wek compares Monique to Shalom Harlow, and makes the sad mistake of mentioning John Galliano in the process. This was filmed months ago, so she didn't know. I'm sure Nigel will mention how he loves the lighthearted fun of Two and a Half Men as well.
With that, the judges deliberate. Nigel loves Mikaela's bone structure, and thinks she's different and striking. Her photo is well done. Alek loves Brittani, and says that her photo looks more like a painting than a human being. ALT agrees that the photo is gorgeous, and could be hung in a salon. Tyra says that she doesn't have a salon, and asks if you can get one at the swap meet. ALT wishes that Jaclyn had done something different with her hands, though he thinks that she's an extraordinary girl. Alek says that the hands look like prop hands, which is true. Kasia is not a classic beauty, Nigel says, but her photo works. Tyra thinks that Kasia's eyes follow her everywhere, like a creepy painting. Dalya is a one-shot wonder, and is potentially a mistake, according to Nigel. He says that you wouldn't book her again if you looked at her film and there was only one closed-eye shot that worked. ALT doesn't feel the impact of beauty in Alexandria's shot, but Nigel really likes it. He thinks it's different and unusual, and says that Alexandria did her own thing, and/or a Jim Morrison thing.
Sara's photo is iffy. Alek likes it, but doesn't enjoy her dead hand. However she thinks the face is sweet. Molly physically is a very pretty girl, but Nigel wants to see something more than that. He wonders where she is in the picture. Dominique is beautiful and Alek says she could be of multiple origins, which is a beautiful thing. ALT thinks that Nicole is young and fresh in front of them, but photographs old. Nigel agrees. Hannah provided one of the most magical moments of the evening, according to ALT. The eyes, the water, the grace, the gorgeousness. I guess "water" is couture for "tears." Alek loves how she used her hands, and Nigel says that the photo is stellar. Tyra says that Monique's photo is art. She would totally put it in her salon, after she bought her salon at the swap meet. Alek cracks up at Tyra's shenanigans. And finally, we get to see Ondrei's photo. Alek notes that Ondrei's eyes say so much, and it's beautiful. Nigel says that Ondrei's nerves did get the best of her, and all he can see is fear. With that, the judges have made their decision.
The girls return and Tyra says, "Who knows how many photos I have in my hands?" Ha! Way to be cagey for an extra two minutes, Tyra. The best photo this week goes to Hannah. Crying works! Hannah still has my dream hair. So pretty. The runner-up for best photo is Brittani. She's followed by Monique, Mikaela, Kasia, Dominique, Sara, Alexandria, Jaclyn, and Molly. This leaves Dalya and Nicole in the bottom two. They step forward, and Tyra tells Nicole that the judges are nervous that she looks like a teenager in person, and like a teenager's auntie in her photos. And then there's Dalya, who has stunning bone structure and had a gorgeous photo in this week. However, it was the only usable photo of all of her shots. Tyra drags out the question of Ondrei's photo before finally revealing that it wasn't the worst, and either Nicole or Dalya will indeed be going home. Unhappily for Alexandria, Dalya's chicken-judging ways will live to see another week. It's octogenarian-looking Nicole who is sent back to the nursing home. She says that she was trying too hard, and Tyra agrees and tells her to just let it be. Nicole appreciates Tyra's advice, and tells us that she was too focused on being fierce, which doesn't jive with her look. She tried something new, at the worst of all times. However, she learned from this experience and is resigned to her fate.
week: Makeovers and a couture photo shoot!
Potes is now on Twitter! Follow her @traciepotes, or email her your thoughts about proper chicken storage at potesypotes@gmail.com.
week: Makeovers and a couture photo shoot!
Potes is now on Twitter! Follow her @traciepotes, or email her your thoughts about proper chicken storage at potesypotes@gmail.com.