We're continuing the tradition of opening up the group sing, as the Top 12's version of Phillip Phillips's "Home" is recorded by themselves on cell phones all over L.A. Which, ironically, is not home for any of them.
After the ads, Ryan tells us that there were 70 million votes cast last night, clearly hoping we won't remember that last night there were 71 million. I remember, though. Out come the judges, who find bowls of gummy bears at their seats for some reason. Harry throws his into the audience and immediately regrets doing something so uncool. Ryan makes some promises with regard to tonight's show, and then we're into last night's after-show moments. At dinner in the same restaurant as last week, they talked about the judges' comments -- particularly the tough ones -- but generally ended up looking on the bright side, which means they meant nothing. After that clip, Ryan and Randy are over at the lounge, and Randy agrees that Harry might have been a little rough last night. Harry assures them all that they're immensely talented and says that he was hired as a judge and not as a mentor, so he's been using his time to give them feedback they can use. He does say this is the best group since the first season, which they may well be when one is listening to them in person, but he didn't see it last night. Ryan takes his point and then cues up a cell phone video from Harry's hero, Saints quarterback Drew Brees, telling him to lighten up. Harry takes that point, but he also points out that when Drew Brees screws up, his coach doesn't tell him how handsome he is. Harry is right, as usual -- and not just because Drew Brees isn't all that handsome.
Emily, Sam, Jessica and Ben are the first group to be called to center stage for some results. The clips from last night's show most of them struggling a bit and not getting the best reviews from the judges, but when the lights are dimmed, he wastes little time telling Emily that she's in the bottom three. Ben, Sam and Jessica, however, are safe. For a minute there I thought the whole bottom three would come from the same group. That would have saved some time.
Once again, they're doing that thing where the results show subjects the judges to a similar treatment to what the contestants received during the performance show. Keith has his own reminiscence of home, namely when he was a kid in an imaginary band he called "Rock Fever," and painted the name of the band on the side of the garage. Alas, his parents were not fans. Then we get an intro clip of Phillip Phillips, Jr., who interviews about how he's currently working on his second album. He compares returning to Idol as "like a blind date but you know who it is," which is somehow both meaningless and wrong, which takes some doing. Yes, he is back tonight, playing a new song called "Raging Fire." This new song isn't bad, actually, and sounds a lot more like what I expected him to sound like as an artist than "Home" or "Gone, Gone, Gone" did. This is less folky, more energetic and a bit more adventurous rhythmically. Most of all, with horns and strings supporting his band, it's a lot more Dave Matthews-y, which is who Phillip Phillips really was all along. Can't say he didn't keep his campaign promises eventually. And believe it or not, this is the most energetic I've ever seen him. Keith leaps to his feet at the end, and the other judges soon join him. Afterwards, Ryan gets Phillip to share about playing in Brazil with John Mayer and Bruce Springsteen. Phil, you will be stunned to hear, was in favor of it.
In Harry's trailer, he talks about how "When the Saints Go Marching In" reminds him of his hometown of New Orleans. Doesn't that song remind everyone of New Orleans? Then Ryan calls up Dexter, Jena, Alex and Majesty. Clearly Dexter will be safe, because according to the clips he's the only one who didn't blow it last night. Ryan does indeed end his suspense first, as if there's any suspense on that score anyway. Majesty is also safe and Jena is sent to the bottom three, leaving Alex to return to the couches. If he can keep his gorge down long enough to get there.
It's Randy's turn to be "tastemaker," introducing Irish band Kodaline, who he assures us is about to pop in the U.S. They're actually not bad, but there's not much to distinguish them from all the other bands currently groping for just the right mix of modern plaintiveness and Irish deedly-deedly. Think U2 & Sons if you will. The whole part before the coda is literally a lot of the lead singer going "whoa" a lot. But I'm sure these "about to pop" bands are a whole lot cheaper than a Bruno Mars or Rihanna to stick on these results shows, so don't expect them to go anywhere.
Jennifer's hometown memory song is "Saturday in the Park" by Chicago, even though her childhood was in New York. Don't be fooled by the rocks that she got, y'all. Harry is impressed at how she was able to sing in the same key as the record without hearing it. Then the final group is Malaya, M.K. (who assured a camera after last night's show that she does want to be here, she's just bad at connecting), C.J. (who says he's been singing sharp his whole life, so suck it) and Caleb. Caleb is safe, obviously, as is C.J. Either M.K. or Malaya will return to the bottom three for the second week in a row, and it's… M.K. Another all-girl bottom three. This is clearly not Idol 12.
After the ads, Ryan decides to let the judges pick on M.K. some more, and Keith says she needs to put more work into connecting. That should be fun to practice. Not that it's likely to matter. The first one sent back to the lounge is Jena, and to my surprise, so is M.K., meaning Emily is going to be singing for the save. Which she will not get, but there are still a few minutes of show to fill. Emily sings "Stars," turning it into a generic ballad, while the profile pics of those who voted for her drift down the screen behind her. Not for nothing, but there are a lot of spaces between those pictures. Emily either isn't trying very hard or she's just not good at this song, because she wouldn't be getting the save for this performance even if the judges were seriously considering using it tonight. The judges do make a convincing show of looking as if they're discussing it, and it looks like once again, Jennifer is the holdout and Harry is the one to break the news that the save is not being used tonight. Emily's farewell montage is scored to her own performance of "Breakaway" by Kelly Clarkson, which is a nice touch rather than using the same song all season. And I'm saying that as someone who missed the Daniel Powter "Bad Day" seasons. What were there, thirty of those? Emily's head shot on the balcony goes noisily dark as Ryan says that week the theme will be "Songs from the Cinema." In other words, any song that was ever in any movie ever, in other words, any song. Pretty much like all of the themes this season. Yeah, I guess I'm okay with that.
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M. Giant is a Minneapolis- based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter, or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.
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