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Kabletown exec Hank Hooper considers canceling TGS, so Jack asks him to watch the show's 100th episode and reconsider. As the show is being prepped, a gas leak in the studio leads to hallucinations that underscore both Jack and Lemon's doubts about their career decisions. Jack's delusions tell him to fire Lemon, while Lemon's tell her to reunite with Dennis. Everyone comes to his/her right mind before anything truly disastrous happens, but then Lemon realizes there is no show thanks to the gibberish gas-inspired musings of the writers. So what does she do? Cause another gas leak and save TGS!
After promising to have Kenneth's baby if TGS made it to 100 episodes, Jenna gets the thought of motherhood into her mind. First she thinks it would be a great PR move to make it seem like leaving the show was her choice, then reconnects with Paul/'Gina to explore her options, and finally tries to seduce Kenneth. Eventually, she develops a hysterical pregnancy that sorts itself out once the gas is gone.
Tracy hits the talk show circuit to alienate all the fans he developed while EGOT-ing, only the plan backfires, and everyone admires his bravery and honesty. Lemon tells him to take it to the streets, but this plan falls apart when he ends up saving a drowning man and becoming a hero. Jenna eventually suggests that the only way Tracy can reverse the goodwill is to murder someone. Guess which hapless page offers to take a bullet for the goodwill of the show. Before we mourn the loss of our beloved Kenneth, Jack gives Tracy his silver bullet -- do television. That will destroy his credibility once and for all.
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Want more? The full recap starts right below!Jack is tightening a Philadelphia Flyers tie as Lemon marches angrily into Jack's office, clucking, "This better be important, I was in the middle of bidding on a bag of bras on eBay." Jack tells her Hank Hooper is on his way to meet with them. Just then, Hank turns around Jack's chair. They have no idea how he got there. Jack says he was just sitting in the chair a minute before. Hank responds jollily, "Nope, that was me. What can I say? I smell like leather." He gives Lemon a big hug and smilingly tells her that TGS is terrible and he's going to cancel it. Jack tells Hank that tonight is the show's 100th episode, and they've been getting good media buzz lately -- "we got on Wikipedia this week." Hank is unmoved.
Lemon asks, "Really? You want to cancel the only show on your network starring a 42-year-old woman? A show that is number one among men 18-49... months left in prison?" She continues, "I thought this company was a family, but I guess it's that Austrian family, and I am the girl stuck in the basement..." Just as she starts to make completely, graphically clear just how Hank is the Kabletown Fritzl, Jack cuts her off. He announces that Tracy is back and asks if, as a personal favor, Hank will let TGS have its 100th episode, then reconsider. Says Hank, "You get one more shot -- just like the army doctor said to me after my weekend in Okinawa!" He adds that he's amazed how much Jack will stick his neck out for his staff. He credits that lack of cutthroat behavior to why Jack is still at Kabletown instead of CEO of GE. Hank means it as a compliment, but it plants a seed of discontent in Jack's mind.
After Hank leaves, Jack asks if Tracy really is back. Lemon promises to get it done, Lemon-style. Cut to flashbacks of her singing "Everybody Dance Now" and ripping off her shirt at a GE Six Sigma conference, threatening to cut off Kenneth's face if he doesn't get her a sandwich, using an old man as a human shield on the plane with a gun-wielding Carol, and weaseling her way out of jury duty by dressing up as Princess Leia and claiming she's a hologram. Jack asks what's the hold-up with Tracy, and Lemon updates him on Tracy's latest crisis -- too much respect. Lemon has already put a plan in motion to get Tracy on every morning show in New York so he can alienate all his fans once again. She says she's been prepping him all week. Flash to Lemon pretending to be Regis Philbin, then being cut off by Tracy, who screams, "Jesus was black!" and pushes Lemon to the ground. Jack tells her to get it together because he has a very full plate. Lemon perks up, "Really? Is it from that pie place?" Jack tells her he's tired of going to bat for her show. She says okay, then starts to ask for clarification. Jack snaps, "There is no pie!" Credits.
Danny and Jenna (a.k.a. a very pregnant Jane Krakowski) practice a skit about "Pam, The Overly Confident Morbidly Obese Woman." Her catchphrase is, "I can't sit in a booth!" Pete congratulates them all on doing Pam 107 times in 100 shows. Jenna asks Danny, "Can you believe we've been doing this five years?" Danny reminds her he wasn't around five years ago, it was some other guy. Jenna snips, "I don't think so." Kenneth walks up to give Jenna a bouquet of flowers (to cover JK's baby bump). She says it's been an amazing run. Cue flashbacks of Jenna screaming, "I will choke you to death with your boyfriend's wig!" slapping Lemon and Kenneth, and going Springer-style on someone. Danny asks if they can reminisce about something that's happened since he came to the show -- that way he can see the memories.
Kenneth says he'll never forget what Jenna said to him after the first show: "If this turkey goes 100 episodes, I'll have your baby." Danny somehow saw that memory and begins to freak out that he might be dead. "Well," jokes Kenneth, "it's been 100 episodes. I better lay you across my grandmother's lap in the mating shed!" In some more meta-ness re: Krakowski, Danny wonders what it would actually be like if Jenna were a mother. "It would be horrible! The only thing I want latched to my funbags are celebrity DJs." Kenneth thinks she'd make a wonderful parent, singing to the baby and playing all the witch roles in fairy tale re-enactments. She shrugs it off, calling Kenneth an "albino goon." He hrmphs, "I wish! Albino's get to be watchers in the mating shed." Kenneth steps away, and Danny continues to muse over the horror that would be a pregnant Jenna. He imagines a picture of Jenna opposite one of Natalie Portman in Us Weekly's "Who Wore It Best?" Jenna reflexes, "I did. I wore it best!" Then she has an idea: A baby gets you attention.
Lemon interrupts for a little all-staff pep talk. Or to tell them to watch their asses because the show will be cancelled if they don't get back Tracy and pull off their greatest show ever that night. Frank says that they can forget if they're counting on Tracy. He pulls off his "SITTING OVATION" hat to reveal a teeny-tiny baseball cap that reads "I GIVE UP." Lemon orders him to put his bigger hat back on. She says they've been through bad times before. Flashbacks: Writers throwing food at Lemon, Jenna falling off the roof of a set, Jack having a heart attack, Tracy passing out on roofies, and Lemon flipping over a table as she rages, "Where's my mac and cheese!" Back in the present, she spins, "And we've had some good times. The only clip is of Lutz tripping and spilling an entire tray of chocolate mousse. Boy, Jack and Lemon sure had a good laugh over that one. Or it was an outtake. Lemon tells everyone it's their moment to shine. "Tonight TGS won't be the worst thing on television," she rallies. "It'll be John Stossel! Who's with me?" As everyone claps, Lemon hallucinates that she's seeing a little blue creature (Rachel Dratch).
This vision is explained by the fact that there's a gas leak downstairs. Janitor Tom (Michael Keaton) is worked up that this calamity had to befall him on his last day on the job. He notices the gas leak is going straight to the sixth floor, where TGS is. He says they'll have to evacuate everyone, then jokes, "Wait, isn't that show already half dead?" He and the other two janitors have a chuckle. Subhas gets a dreamy look in his eye and asks, "Who wants to kiss?" Tom suggests they all go get some air.
He heads upstairs with Pete to update Jack on the gas leak situation. Jack says, "You know what fascinates me?" Tom shoots back, "Mystery novels written by janitors?" Jack says no. His panties are in a twist because everyone from TGS seems to think their problems outrank his. He asks how bad the gas leak is, and Tom reports that it's bad enough to cause hallucinations, revelations, flashbacks and nostalgia. Jack tells him to evacuate the sixth floor so he won't have to have any gas-induced conversations with the staffers. Pete tries to bring up all the crazy guest stars and characters that have stopped by the show, but Jack cuts him off before we get a flashback. No fake Oprah?
Downstairs, Lemon is joking-slash-crying with the little blue creature, "I can't believe it's been 100 shows. More like 100 little strokes!" She says how much she's changed, including losing Dennis. "Sure he was an idiot, but he made great chili and didn't mind if I watched TV during sex." She wonders if she was better off five years ago. Pete interrupts to hand her her coat and tell her to evacuate. Kenneth appears with a hard hat and glow sticks to direct the staffers out. Except he's been around the gas leak long enough to freak out when the glow sticks suddenly become troll penises. He yelps, "Oh, God! What have I done?"
Meanwhile, Tracy makes the morning show rounds, and it goes about as poorly as anything he puts his mind to. Only this time, his failure is viewed as success. For instance, when he tells Rachael Ray to "shut [her] mouth, back that ass up and make [him] a sandwich," she applauds him for staying in character. He reveals to Regis, Kelly and all the ugly white ladies in the audience that he never went to Africa, only to a warehouse in Queens where he watched vintage pornography. Kelly commends his honesty. And Matt Lauer calls him brave for walking away from fame. Tracy gets frustrated and tosses a chair. Matt deems him a true artist, who "feels things we don't."
30 Rock. The staffers are all out on the plaza, and Lemon is unimpressed with the writers' suggestions for the night's show. Lemon tells them to throw everything out and start over. Lutz says it's hard to concentrate because it's so nice working outside. At which point a drunken homeless man promptly throws up on him. Lemon gets a phone call from Tracy, who tells her their plan was an epic fail. Lemon tells him to get back, and they'll figure something out. He retorts, "Eff you, L.L. ...spells 'FULL,' because you're full of B.S., Liz Lemon!" Lemon insists there's time, urging that, if the media won't let him embarrass himself, to "be like Michael McDonald and take it to the streets." If the public hates him, the media will follow, then he'll get his old life back. Tracy says she better be right because he can't take much more. What's more, Bono may have snuck into his limo.
After Lemon hangs up, Jenna runs over to ask if she'd be a good mother. Lemon does a spit take, then marvels, "No! And I wasn't even drinking anything." Jenna says she's at a point in her life where she has a strong desire to nurture -- her career. She thinks pregnancy would be great PR. With TGS circling the drain, Jenna says having a child would be a great excuse for why she's about to stop working. Lemon tells her to think seriously, because getting pregnant will mean she'll have a child. "I know," says Jenna, "who'll grow up to be a little gay fancy man!" Still, Lemon doesn't think Jenna will be able to find a man to "ride that crazy train." But Jenna already has someone in mind -- Kenneth. Jenna walks off as Lemon puts the kibosh on the homeless guy's idea to do a sketch about how the Empire State Building is controlling us through electricity.
Down in the utilities room, Tom is one turn away from fixing the gas leak when he loses control of the wrench and opens up the leak to the 52nd floor. He screams, "Damn it! I'm getting to old for this shhhhhhh sound that comes from the gas pipe."
The gas makes its way up to Jack. Suddenly, he envisions the door breaking down and an even more handsome version of himself coming into the room. It's GE CEO Jack, who has come from an alternate universe in which he followed their plan for world domination. In addition to running GE, he owns an NFL team and guest starred on Entourage. Jack criticizes CEO Jack's choice to pair a striped shirt and striped tie. CEO Jack explains it's called "power clashing," and he wore this very look on the January cover of Meetings magazine. Jack says incredulously, "We made the cover during Meetings History Month?" "I made the cover," snits CEO Jack.
He pours himself a scotch and asks what's happened to Jack. He didn't follow his own plan and is now working for "Kableklown." Jack corrects him, saying it's not funny. "It was when I said it on my syndicated radio show," snarks CEO Jack. CEO Jack says Jack used to be a shark. Jack insists he still is, then proffers his hands like claws. "Sharks don't have claws!" yells CEO Jack. "You don't even know what a shark is anymore." Jack claps his hand to his mouth in horror. CEO Jack traces it all back to Lemon, who has become Jack's focus at the expense of his ambition. He resurrects Jack's dilemma from the first episode. To fire or not to fire Lemon? Tom knocks on the door to tell Jack about the gas leak. Jack agrees to evacuate, with CEO Jack taking a deep breath in as he screams out, "The real Jack Donaghy could handle a little gas leak!"
Over on the Brooklyn Promenade, Tracy also repeats some behavior from the first episode -- taking to the public in his underwear and yelling, "I am a Jedi!" Of course some damn hipster approaches and philosophizes that Tracy is ironically reappropriating himself. Tracy has failed again. Just then, a guy flies off of his bike into the river. Tracy is forced to save him, and his heroic act is marked on that night's newscast.
Lemon sees the news on the ticker and is discouraged. She focuses back in on the task at hand -- making TGS better than ever. She asks Lutz what he's working on. "Breathing through my mouth so I don't smell the throw-up on my shirt," he says. And all I'll say for his explanation for not taking his shirt off is that it involves two rescue chimps and a missing nipple. Lemon tells him to focus, then asks Cerie for her computer. Cerie says she's only seen her use it to look at pictures of Nate Berkus, so she didn't bring it.
As Lemon heads back inside, she runs into Jack. She asks if he can call in favors from Jeter and Springsteen to get them to be in the show. "They have to kiss," she adds. Flustered that she needs his help, Jack blows up at her. He leads her into the NBC store to ask who she thinks is the reason his career is in the pits. She ventures, "Sort of thinking you're going to say 'Leno'?" He says that, in trying to help her, he "became the American auto industry, failing to recognize that you can't fix a Lemon." She argues, to the contrary, Jack has dragged her down and her life was better five years ago. Lemon demands a flashback: Jack consults with Pete about firing Lemon, but Pete insists that Lemon has nothing else going on ("She threw a birthday party for her TV!") and vows to quit if Lemon is fired. Jack tells him he'll never succeed for sticking his neck out for someone like Lemon but takes consolation in firing someone, even if it's not Lemon herself. Back to the present, Lemon calls Jack out for wanting to fire her one week, then positioning himself as her mentor the . Jack says that he got Lemon-ed. She stomps out, saying, "I should have fired you from my life." Then she screws up opening the door for her dramatic exit, and Jack smugs that he knew she was supposed to push instead of pull.
Downtown, Jenna meets up with Paul/'Gina Bologna. He wonders if it's just a visit or if she'll be activating his electric underwear. She promises it's just to talk and asks Paul if he think she'd be a good mother. He says of course not. For that matter, he'd be a terrible father because, if they had a child prettier than them, they'd have to leave it in a desert. He asks if it's really what she wants. She says she didn't think so until Kenneth said she'd be good at it -- not to mention that the hullaballoo over her crazy name choice will be great exposure. "Right now it's between Frisbee Face and Glock, gender irrelevant," she reports. Paul: "I love you, Jenna Maroney. I want to hogtie you and hide you in the luggage compartment of a Greyhound bus with just a bowl of dirty water." That said, Paul thinks Kenneth may be the only person in the world who believes Jenna should have a baby.
Lemon is working when Dennis startles her. He pulls out a Zack Morris cell phone (an upgrade from the pager!) and says he got the message she left for him while high on gas an hour ago in her office. Lemon admits she wasn't in her right mind and would never call him after everything he's done. Flashbacks: Dennis on To Catch a Predator, Dennis suggesting a threesome, Dennis hitting on the waitress then forcing Lemon to flee the restaurant without paying the check -- even though she checked her coat. Dennis says Lemon has subconscious lingering feelings for him, and he knew she'd one day be vulnerable from a gas leak or a coma or a super-period. She insists that he was a mistake, and the only thing she misses is the time in her life when she could afford to make mistakes. Just then, Pete announces that the staffers can head back upstairs. Dennis tells Lemon that he won't let her brush him off this easily. "And us Duffies, we don't quit. We didn't give up when we got kicked out of Ireland. We didn't give up when America sent us back. And when didn't give up when Ireland then just set us adrift on a log." He promises it's not over.
In the elevator, Kenneth is, as always, excited about what an exciting day it's been. Jack and Lemon are sour as ever. They get out of the elevator, and Lemon gets a call from Tracy, who says he's back. Lemon jubilantly tells the writers to do an Obama cold open, get a fart doctor, and -- what the hell -- write up that bum's Empire State Building idea. Tracy corrects her, saying he's back to where he was yesterday with too much respect. He tells her he even tried to call a women's basketball team "nappy-headed hos," then adds, "but apparently I'm allowed to talk like that. Why?"
Hank Hooper materializes from nowhere and hears that Lemon is talking to Tracy. He says he popped by to personally introduce himself to Tracy. Lemon lies that Tracy likes to learn his lines locked in the bathroom. Hank tells her, "Good luck tonight, you're going to need it!" He leaves, and Lemon returns to cajoling Tracy to return to the show. She digs deep and decides there's only one place that will revive his dying spirit: The strip club.
At da club, Lemon heads back to the table with a head-heavy glass of beer. She offers to buy a lap dance with her PayPal account. But it's already too late. The stripper recognizes Tracy from Hard to Watch and gushes over how his performance changed her life. Flash forward to seven minutes later, when Tracy is trying to discourage all the crying strippers from sharing their bullshit with him. One of them is particularly fond of his phrase from the movie, "I invent my tomorrow." He gruffs, "But I wasn't even supposed to say that. The line was 'Shireen, I hope Dr. Ngutu has good news about my endoscopy,' but I couldn't get it right so they told me to improv!" Lemon stands on the stage and rains down money onto the strippers in one last attempt, but she soon enough sees Tracy is irreparably damaged. Plus the strip club owner comes at her with a broom, shouting, "Get off the stage! No whites!"
30 Rock. Kenneth enters Jenna's dressing room to find candles, incense and a very sultry-looking Jenna waiting for him. She reminds him about their joke about having his baby. He laughs it off, saying it's crazy. And she agrees, then adds, "Unless you're into it," before slamming the door behind him. He tells her it's wrong because they're not married and of different religions. She purrs that he might be her only chance, then tries to seduce him by sticking her fingers in his mouth. He gags and runs out of the room. She yells after him, "Fine! I'll get you while you're sleeping! It's not rape if neither party really wants it."
She blows out a whale semen candle and returns it to Tracy. He tells her he's quitting showbiz because he can't stop the horrible respect people have for him. Jenna says in confidence that Tracy can't quit because she and the show both need him. She tells him to consider child-raping Roman Polanski or Communist informer Elia Kazan who earned respect despite the odds. Tracy says, "That's crazy! A man named Elia. That's a giraffe's name!" Jenna says the only celebrities who completely undo their goodwill are murderers. Tracy thinks that's nuts, even for them. Jenna jokes that it would take a pretty big gas leak for them to go through with that plan.
Lemon strides through the writers' room and into her office, where Dennis is waiting for her. Through a long, unwieldy rant, he drops two facts: 1.) He's immune to gas and 2.) He'll never do better than Lemon. She still rejects him, so he goes down to re-break the gas line.
Upstairs, Jack's door busts down yet again. Except this time it's Past Jack, from the past when everyone talks like Ronald Reagan went surfing. He threatens to jump out the window if Jack is what he's going to become. CEO Jack appears in a tuxedo to stop him and to tell Jack he can fix everything by getting rid of Lemon. Jack doesn't know if he can, so Past Jack tries to stick it to him by hitting himself in the groin. Unfortunately, Past Jack isn't the brightest Jack in the Box, so it only hurts him. CEO Jack tells Jack to be the man he was meant to be, adding, "This tuxedo was made out of the puma that I rode to my 50th birthday party." Jack notes both CEO Jack and Past Jack are wearing tuxedos. They duh, "It's after six. What are we, farmers?"
Dr. Spaceman is downstairs to do a completely useless check-up on high-as-a-kite Pete. Jenna walks in with the baby bump in full view, which she now pawns off to being a hysterical pregnancy. Jenna wonders why she's so unhappy when she's supposedly getting everything she wants, minus the actual child. Her personal crisis bores Dr. Spaceman, so he leaves as Danny starts singing about his memories -- all of which flash back to Jenna's old costar. He eventually falls backward over a drum set.
Out in the corridor, Tracy and Kenneth stop right under the air shaft to chat about Tracy leaving. Kenneth refuses to believe it, but Tracy says the only way he can stay is to shoot someone. They decide to take a deep breath as they consider that prospect. Jacked up on gas, they think it's a brilliant idea and decide to go to the roof and make it work.
Lemon comes across them as she stumbles down the hall, where she finds Dennis. He has come to get her to sign a lease so he can move in to her apartment. He promises to make her chili every night and provide for her. She agrees to sign the lease, but she doesn't have a pen, and all Dennis has is a kick-ass laser pointer he points at nerds' crotches in the park. She puts her head on his shoulder, and they go looking for a pen.
Upstairs, the three Jacks are acquainted with a fourth Jack: Future Jack from 30 years to come. He warns Jack not to listen to the others and promises he'll be happy. CEO Jack tells Jack not to listen to Future Jack. If he chooses his path, he'll spearhead GE's work on the electric vagina, he'll have a cold glass house, and he'll own the Buffalo Bills. Jack looks troubled, "You didn't say it was the Bills." Future Jack tells Jack not to let Lemon sign the lease with Dennis or she'll be married to him and living in Jacksonville in three years' time. Say Jack, "Her hair can't handle that humidity!" Then he has a change of heart and says he's tired of saving Lemon. Future Jack says that, in saving Lemon, Jack would be saving himself, too. CEO Jack encourages Jack once more to fire Lemon, and Jack gets in the elevator. As the door closes behind him, all three alternaJacks look each other up and down. CEO Jack finally says the obvious, "We're gonna have sex with each other, right?"
Studio. Jack runs in to stop Lemon from signing the lease. Just as Jack and Dennis are about to get into it, Tom comes in to announce that someone sabotaged the gas line. Dennis tries to pull off the "Who, me?" approach, but the air is clear again, and Lemon sees through his charade. Security guards escort Dennis out of the building as Tom tells everyone the studio should be fine by show time. This sets off another freak-out for Lemon, who still has to put together a show. Jack, too, stresses that he promised Hank Hooper that Tracy would be back. Lemon suddenly remembers seeing Tracy and Kenneth going to the roof with a gun.
Jenna joins them as they run to the elevator. They run into Hank, who proposes Jenna do a daytime talk show. The minute Jenna hears about another chance at fame, she completely abandons the idea of motherhood, and her baby bump disappears. With that, the elevator comes, and the gang heads up to the roof to save Kenneth, who is rapidly beginning to doubt the decision he made downstairs. Jack wrestles the gun away from Tracy and tells him the fix is simple: If he wants no respect, go back to TV.
They head back to the elevator with five minutes to spare. They get there to find Tom, who reports they're having elevator trouble and will have to take the stairs. They run to the stairwell, and the gun inadvertently goes off. Jack screams he's okay, so they keep running. Tom breathes a sigh of relief that he made it through his last day -- then he looks down to see the bullet hole in his abdomen.
Running down the stairs, The Five run into a wheelchair-bound guy, Brian Williams, and several recurring hobos. They hit the stage with 30 seconds to spare. Then Lemon realizes the whole show is gibberish because it was written during the second gas leak. She looks to see Hank waving his thumb like a Roman emperor before a gladiator, and she gets an idea. She heads down to break the gas line one more time. And it's the funniest TGS ever! At least if you're in the studio. Which Hank Hooper is. The show is saved!
Elsewhere, Tom Hanks sees that Tracy is back to doing TV and calls George Clooney to get Tracy taken off the official A-list. When Clooney doesn't have the password, Hanks tells him to wake up the webmaster, Brad Pitt.
Back in the studio, Jack and Lemon use the gas haze as an excuse to kiss, make up, and clink cheers fake shot glasses to 100 more episodes.
Bonus! Footage of a chicken snowboarding! And a preview of Tracy, Jenna and Kenneth's tombstones underscored by serene music. Tracy's deems him a father, husband, diabetic, alcoholic and hero. He was "Born sometime in 1970?" and died on March 17, 2016. Jenna's has theater masks and, most shockingly, her real date of birth: February 24, 1969. She also dies March 17, 2016. And last comes Kenneth. I'm pretty sure his tombstone reads May 27, 1781- March 31, 2016. The music gets more frenetic, and Kenneth's thumbs-up pops out of the grave Carrie-style.
Watch the episode below, discuss it in our forums, then see what the Showtime version of 30 Rock would be like.
What are people saying about your favorite shows and stars right now? Find out with Talk Without Pity, the social media site for real TV fans. See Tweets and Facebook comments in real time and add your own -- all without leaving TWoP. Join the conversation now!