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Wayne's already back on his feet, and defending his office from the Veep's attempt to 25th-Amendment him. After a brief debate, the Cabinet is tied 7-7 on removing Wayne from office. That means he stays, until the Veep claims that Karen's vote doesn't count because she resigned as National Security Advisor. Nothing for it but to reconvene the Supreme Court. Everyone knows the Veep doesn't have a leg to stand on, including his Chief of Staff, Lisa. So she secretly offers to commit perjury to support his case. The Veep takes her up on it, much to his embarrassment when it turns out that Tom's bugged the conference room. Tom forces the Veep to back down, and Wayne gets to remain president for as long as he can continue browbeating his doctor into keeping him conscious with adrenalin shots. At CTU, Doyle has decided that the security breach was Milo's fault, so he enlists Nadia's help in finding the proof on Milo's system. She does, and it turns out that Doyle only wanted to hide the evidence to keep Milo out of trouble. Aw, what a nice asshole. Satisfied with his immunity agreement, Gredenko calls Fayed to set up a meeting at the Santa Monica Pier. Before cutting Gredenko loose, CTU tags him with a radioactive tracker isotope in his arm. Which works great, until Fayed's men cut Gredenko's arm off. Gredenko then tries to make a solo escape by outing Fayed in a crowded bar, which would have gotten Fayed killed if Kiefer hadn't shown up in time to take him into custody. Unfortunately, Fayed left his two remaining nukes behind with his men, so they're still out there somewhere. Gredenko only gets far enough to quickly bleed to death, unlike a certain amputee on another Monday-night Fox show I could mention. And it looks like Wayne has figured out a way to finally stop people from accusing him of being weak: he's going to haul off and nuke Mideastia after all. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Since the Veep decided to try and have Wayne removed from power at the end of the last hour, the Cabinet has wasted no time convening in the White House Bunker's Battle Bridge (and, where applicable, by videoconference). They must not like Wayne much, either. Tom is going to be facilitating the upcoming hearing, so he's the one taking attendance. Who's missing? Oh, right, the President of the United States. Maybe he thinks they can't fire him if he doesn't show up.
Wayne is currently in some ratty little bunker office, already dressed in his shirt and tie (and also pants -- sorry, ladies). He's also got a Season-3-Tony neck bandage, and fresh stitches in his left cheek. That's hardcore. If he were willing to knock out a couple of teeth, nobody would dare stand in his way. As Doctor Welton finishes taking Wayne's blood pressure, Wayne tries to get out of the wheelchair he's been parked in. Karen and Sandra do the nurturing-woman thing, as Sandra tells him to taka care of himself and Karen reminds him that Roosevelt did fine in a wheelchair. Wayne protests that he doesn't want to look weak in front of the Cabinet. He's going to be self-conscious enough being the only black guy in the room. So instead of asking for a jaunty FDR cigarette holder to waggle at the ceiling, Wayne asks Dr. Welton for a shot of adrenalin. The doctor tries to warn Wayne off of doing anything that will elevate his blood pressure, but his advice is cut off when Tom sticks his head in to say that everyone's waiting. "Just do it," Wayne orders the doctor. "Now." Otherwise Wayne's going to get pissed off enough to elevate his blood pressure all by himself.
Kiefer's still in the House of Hauser, on the phone with Buchanan to explain that Gredenko offered up Fayed in exchange for immunity and a promise not to be returned to Russia. Kiefer doesn't trust Gredenko, especially after he gave in so quickly. Buchanan dodges the decision and leaves it up to Kiefer, because he's finally starting to figure out who the boss really is around here. Buchanan does notify Kiefer about what's going on in D.C., with Wayne awake and trying to keep being president in the face of the Veep's 25th Amendment challenge. Buchanan doesn't yet know how it's going to shake out, but he does know that if another nuke goes off in the U.S., the Veep is certain to get his way. "His way" meaning, of course, "Point everything east and hit 'launch.'" Speaking of getting his way, Kiefer realizes that, with the presidency up in the air, any immunity agreement for Gredenko won't be worth the Mad Lib page it's printed on. So now that Kiefer doesn't have to hold up his end of Gredenko's offer anyway, the decision of whether to take Gredenko up on it just got a whole lot easier. He tells Buchanan to have the Attorney General draw up the papers. Uh, isn't the Attorney General kind of busy with something else right now?
Wayne, still rather unsteady on his feet, enters the Battle Bridge with his doctor. Everyone stands to greet him, and the Veep shakes his hand, smarming that they're all happy to have him back. Karen rolls her eyes all the way up to the ground floor of the White House. Wayne gets tired of trying to squish the Veep's hand, so everyone takes his or her seat to get started. Tom opens the proceedings by explaining that after the attempt on Wayne's life, his injuries were so serious that his life had to be saved by inducing a temporary coma. That makes it sound really bad, until you remember that Wayne was unconscious for all of five hours. You suppose he woke up asking, "How long was I out? What year is it? Who's the president? No, seriously, who's the president?" Tom says that the question now before the Cabinet is whether Wayne is up to performing his duties after what amounts to a medically induced power-nap. A Cabinet secretary -- I'll guess the Surgeon General, because it amuses me to do so -- asks if this isn't actually a medical question, and whether they'll be allowed to hear medical testimony. Tom takes that as his cue to call up Wayne's doctor. Dr. Welton stands behind Wayne's chair and states his opinion: the worst of the danger is over, Wayne's thinking-cap still fits (as well as ever, that is), and Dr. Welton expects him to make a full recovery. The Maybe Surgeon General asks the doctor how he would vote on this question. But Tom quickly rises to cut off that line of questioning, saying that it's up to the Cabinet. He dismisses Dr. Welton and gives the floor to Wayne.
Without standing, Wayne leans forward in his seat and tells everyone that although the Veep is really only mounting this challenge because Wayne called off his nuclear strike, the vote isn't about policy. He says they can all see that he's awake and alert, so voting to remove him "would be to betray both [their] oath and the American people, who voted [Wayne] as their president." Pretty simple argument. But then the American people also voted the Veep as their vice president to take over in case Wayne got blown up or something, so it's not quite the betrayal he implies. Tom hands things over to the Veep for a rebuttal. The Veep's argument is a bit longer and more nuanced, possibly because, of the two parties, he's the one whose brain isn't getting claustrophobic. He says that the 25th Amendment is intentionally vague so as to allow for the removal of the President under different kinds of circumstances. "When a second nuclear attack spread radiation over one of our major cities," he distorts, he decided to retaliate. And then Wayne called off the retaliation the minute he woke up. The Veep argues that this proves Wayne isn't fit to defend the country in a time of war. What does Wayne have to say about that? Nothing. Debate's over. Thanks for coming, everyone. Look, it's not like I want another long, drawn-out "Trial of President Palmer" arc like from Season 2, but they could at least find a way to indicate that the discussion lasted longer without making us sit through it. I mean, if the debate gets too boring, they can always cut to a more exciting subplot, like the continuing romantic misadventures of Milo and Nadia. But Tom says that they're in a hurry, so he wants to recess and then reconvene to cast their votes in ten minutes. Which is longer than the actual hearing took. Don't believe me? It's only 9:09:07.
When we come back at 9:13:32, we rejoin the continuing romantic misadventures of Milo and Nadia. Milo awkwardly wanders around, trying to think of a work-related excuse to talk to Nadia. He can't just make up some technobabble on the fly? It's not like Nadia's going to admit that she has no idea what he's talking about if he comes up and asks her to open a socket to the vector port firewall proxy network router T1 server. Except he can't come up with anything better than to ask for an update on the Cabinet vote. Nadia says that they haven't come back yet, and then tells him to just forget about what happened today. Milo asks, "Which part? The suspicion of terrorism or [gross leer] the other thing?" Nadia answers the former, and as for the latter, she suggests that they just worry about it later. Milo says that he doesn't think either of them is going to forget about the kiss. Instead of telling Milo that she's going to sue CTU for enough money to pay for a whole lot of therapy, Nadia answers her ringing phone. It's Doyle, calling from his office and asking her to come right up without telling anyone who's calling or where she's going. Ridiculously, she agrees. Probably only because Doyle's office has glass walls. Won't they look lovely from the outside when her arterial spray hits them?
Nadia climbs the steps to Doyle's mezzanine office at 9:14:43 and takes the offered seat. Doyle's spectacularly clumsy opening is, "I know you and I got off to kind of a bad start." Kind of. Nadia angrily points out that he assaulted her. Which is true. Doyle makes the argument that with Muslim terrorists out there and a suspected mole in here, starting with Nadia wasn't racism, but common sense. Nadia doesn't ask whether Doyle will offer to undergo interrogation first in the event of an IRA attack. Instead she concedes that he's not racist, but merely a sadist. But this isn't what he called her up for. He explains to her that the reason the terrorists got into CTU's system was because someone screwed up on some security technobabble. Doyle suspects that it was Milo, and he needs Nadia to get into Milo's computer and prove it. Obviously, Nadia is reluctant. Doyle asks, "Why? Is it because you're too busy deciding if you want to sleep with him?" Doyle really needs to come up with a new conversational gambit instead of always using that one. Nadia hates Doyle so much right now, and I agree. Now that he thinks he's won her over with his charm and finesse, Doyle lays it out for her: Nadia can help him, or he can call a forensics team. They'll tear apart Milo's computer and have Milo frog-marched out of there while everyone watches, because of course none of the non-speaking CTU employees has anything to do but stand around and watch everyone's entrances and exits. Doyle knows that Nadia didn't dig that experience herself: "But you're gonna stand by and watch it happen to him? That's your idea of being a friend?" Nadia gets up in his face and sarcastically asks, "So you want me to betray him for his own good?" Doyle promises that it'll be better for Milo if Nadia helps.
Wayne is sitting with Karen and Sandra outside the Battle Bridge as they discuss what to do to the Veep if the Cabinet keeps Wayne in office. Wayne says that he can't exactly fire him, so Sandra advises him to kick the Veep out of the Bunker. Wayne doesn't want to alienate the Veep's supporters, and would rather be able to keep an eye on him anyway. This would be a much shorter discussion on Rome. Also, all three of them would be fucking. I'm still adjusting to the loss. Wayne's secretary enters to report that the Cabinet is reconvening.
Everyone returns to the Battle Bridge, and Tom calls the vote. He asks for the votes in favor of Wayne staying in office. Unlike Season 2, there's no nifty software application to build up suspense; Tom simply counts the raised hands, confirms that there are no abstentions, and announces with a rueful chuckle that the vote is 7-7. Swell move starting that Department of Homeland Security, whoever's idea that was on this show. Tom turns to the videoconference screen with the Attorney General on it, and asks what they do . The AG says that they're done: since removing the President requires a majority vote, and there isn't one, Wayne gets to keep his job. Wayne's celebratory smile with his sister is short-lived, however, because the Veep pipes up to declare one of the Cabinet votes invalid. Can you guess whose it is? Yes, it's Karen's, because she resigned nine hours ago and spent most of it not going to Los Angeles. Karen says that she came back, but the Veep says that's not good enough. Karen angrily yells at him that she was in a Cabinet meeting with him less than an hour ago. The Veep retorts, "Allowing you to sit in on a meeting isn't the equivalent of recognizing you as National Security Advisor. In fact, I did not and do not so recognize you." Maybe it would have been a good idea to mention that before the vote, but nobody points that out, because now the entire rest of the Cabinet has inexplicably been struck dumb. But then you know how much politicians hate to talk. The Veep says that since Karen's vote doesn't count, the vote is now 6-7 in favor of the Veep. "I'm sorry, Wayne," he lies. Wow, he really must be right if he doesn't have to call him "Mr. President" anymore. Wayne stands and says he's not going to let the Veep steal the presidency. The Veep asks what he plans to do about it. Tom says it's a matter for the courts, and Karen is quick to agree. Well, that should make for a riveting Season 7. The Veep is about to go into a rant about how they don't have time, but the AG cuts in to say that the Supreme Court just happened to have been in session today (just because terrorists are running around with nukes and blowing things up from coast to coast is no reason the highest court in the land can't get together and split some hairs about the 287th Amendment or some such). The upshot is that the justices can be quickly recalled for a decision in less than an hour. Mr. Attorney General, have you ever tried to wake up a ninety-year-old man after midnight? They don't care for it. But as Wayne winces in pain, Tom tells the AG to get going on that and ends the meeting. Wayne and the Veep glare at each other across the room, until Wayne turns and limps out. The Veep whispers to Lisa, "Get my affidavit started." He calls out to Tom, who was just leaving, and fixes him with the scariest angry-dad look he can muster. Which is, you know, pretty scary. "You know something?" he rumbles. "I'm beginning to think you're not on my side." How very astute of him. Tom mildly says that he's on the side of the United States: "And if you ever thought otherwise, you're very much mistaken." So there. The Veep's giant face glares us right into the commercial at 9:20:07.
9:24:34. As Milo finishes a call regarding Gredenko's pending fake immunity agreement, Nadia comes up to his desk and asks him some kind of technobabble question. He technobabbles right back that he'll go reboot something in the machine room, and is about to go do that when he notices her gawping at him with these big sad anime eyes. He asks if she's all right, and she lies that she is. Except she's smiling for the first time ever, so you'd know she's lying even if she wasn't. Once Milo's gone, Nadia heads back to his computer and futzes around with it for a minute, and then returns it to its state. Doyle just happens to be standing on the floor nearby, fiddling with his flak jacket to try to make it more slimming. Nadia stomps over to him and pissily congratulates Doyle on being right. Now Milo can be fired and maybe arrested. "Which is why I'm going to alter the logs so they'll never know," Doyle says, taking the memory stick she's been holding out for him. He plugs it into Milo's computer and changes some stuff around while Nadia watches in confusion. It's only a second's work to cover Milo's tracks, and if Doyle can do that, I don't know why he bothered involving Nadia at all in the first place. Unless it's because he wants to sleep with her. See, Doyle? How do you like it? Nadia asks him why he's covering for Milo. Doyle explains that he only cares about finding the nukes, and that they have a better chance of doing that with Milo around: "Whether he likes me or not." And then he non sequiturs, "And mankind was naught but a single nation." Well, I guess he must not be such a racist after all. Nadia recognizes the quote from the Qu'ran, and asks if he's read it. "And the Bible, and the Upanishads," Doyle brags. "Anything I can get my hands on. You're lucky, you found your answers. I'm looking for mine." What? Hey, here's an answer: stop being such an asshole. It's not that hard. Doyle walks off, satisfied that his showoffy little episode has had its desired effect.
From Nadia's computer, Milo has been watching their interaction for an indeterminate length of time. Nadia goes back over there, and Milo suspiciously asks what Doyle wanted. Nadia lies, for some reason, and makes up an innocuous excuse which Milo totally doesn't believe. He goes back to his desk, his expression troubled. Hey, Milo, why the long face?
Up in the boss's office, Buchanan gets a call from his wife. Karen tells him how the vote went, and explains the nature of the Veep's challenge to her vote in particular. Buchanan tries to assure her that the Veep is being ridiculous, but Karen confesses to having doubts of her own: "If he wins, this will all be my fault." Buchanan tries to talk her out of her tree: "He doesn't have a case. And the Supreme Court will agree." Even though Karen didn't mention anything to him about the Supremes getting involved. Mole! Karen says that they have all of fifteen minutes to prepare their arguments, and Buchanan tells her to call when they have a decision. Somewhere in Washington, Dahlia Lithwick laughs her fucking ass off. Karen thanks Buchanan for being there as opposed to in D.C., with her? "You don't have to thank me. It's my job," he says. Karen for some reason thinks that's funny. And I guess it is, if you take a moment to consider that this is, like, Buchanan's fiftieth episode of being in charge of CTU, which beats any boss-tenure records by a factor of about twenty-five. They say they miss each other, and hang up.
At the House of Hauser, Gredenko gets off the phone with his attorney, who's satisfied with the immunity agreement. Well, he should be; it took long enough. Normally those suckers get cranked out in five or ten minutes. I blame the Attorney General's being distracted. Over his earpiece, Kiefer tells Buchanan that Gredenko's ready to make the call to Fayed. By the way, Buchanan got from his office to the Situation Room and donned his headset in only twenty seconds. I don't think he made the reverse trip that quickly when the building was filling with nerve gas. Buchanan responds that Doyle's ready to head out to whatever meeting-place Fayed specifies. Kiefer acknowledges that and tells Gredenko that he'll kill him if he tries to warn Fayed in any way. Wisely, Gredenko believes him. He dials the phone at 9:29:34.
Fayed's panel truck -- with the two poor, sad, pathetic little suitcase nukes right behind the passenger seat -- is on the move. In the shotgun seat, Fayed answers his cell phone and asks if Gredenko got the security protocols that he left to retrieve over an hour ago. After asking if Gredenko's sure he isn't being watched (and Gredenko skillfully lies that he isn't) and getting in another dig at Gredenko's poor track record today, Fayed asks where Gredenko is now. Upon hearing that Gredenko is in Culver City, Fayed tells Gredenko to meet him at the Santa Monica Pier in ten minutes. Listening on a headset, Buchanan points at Doyle and sends him from the CTU Situation Room. Doyle couldn't have been waiting with his team in an idling SWAT van in the parking lot? Not that it'll make a difference, as we'll see. Gredenko asks for more time, but Fayed refuses to wait. Gredenko asks how he'll find Fayed. "Just be there," says Fayed. "I'll find you." End of call. Kiefer asks how long it'll take Doyle to get there, and when Buchanan tells him thirty minutes, he decides to go with the team he has with him, under an Agent Ryan.
Karen joins Wayne and Sandra in the Battle Bridge anteroom with instructions from the Supreme Court to have their arguments submitted in writing in ten minutes. I'd love to see the actual note. "Write fast, you liberal fuckers! Love, Nino." Wayne says that Sandra's working on their brief now. Hey, wouldn't it be cool if there were already lawyer in the building? Like a White House Counsel or something? Wayne should look into that. Right now, he just smiles proudly at his sister and asks how it's going. Sandra looks up from her legal pad and says that they have a good case. She tells Karen, "You resigned, and [Vice President] Daniels was in charge when you returned. So the legal question is, did he consent to your reinstatement?" Karen says that the Veep did, and never objected to Karen's return or her attendance at a Cabinet meeting. "His own actions prove our case," says Sandra. Open and shut. Hell, this could have been decided in traffic court. Wayne thanks Sandra for everything. Hey, do you think Walid's dead yet?
Things aren't going as well in the conference room that the Veep is using to go over his own affidavit with Lisa. Apparently, his far-from-airtight argument is that he never intended to reinstate Karen, so she had no authority to cast a vote under the 25th Amendment. Lisa points out that the Veep treated her as the NSA after she returned, so it's not like they have a great chance of winning. "Then I am deeply afraid for our country," he drama-Veeps. He speechifies that once the world sees Wayne's refusal to "fight back," terrorists will be lining up to attack with impunity. Lisa seems to agree with him. And then she has an idea. A wonderful, awful idea. She stands up and offers to swear that the Veep told her earlier today to tell Karen that she wasn't going to be reinstated, but that Wayne was revived before Lisa could do so. The Veep tells her that's perjury. "The end justifies the means," says Lisa. "My affidavit will push the Court to rule in your favor so that you can do what's right for this country." The Veep grapples with his conscience, and kicks its ass handily. In fact, if you pause at just the right moment, you can see a tiny little green-smeared tailcoat and top hat smushed into one corner. "Do it," says the Veep. He takes her hand and grossly thanks her. She peels his grody mitt off of her with a soft "Yes, sir."
At 9:33:52, Fayed's panel truck pulls into a garage somewhere. He offloads the two remaining nukes to a minion and announces that two other minions are coming along with him in the truck to met Gredenko. He promises to be back within an hour. The minion staying behind asks what happens if Fayed doesn't return. Fayed takes this very personally, like his underling just wants to take his place. But the minion argues that they can go ahead without Gredenko, and still do a lot of damage without unnecessary risk. But Fayed's made up his mind. He and two of his guys are out of there.
At the White House Bunker, Tom taps on the conference room door and asks for a moment alone with the Veep. Lisa gets up and leaves, probably already knowing she's busted. Once it's just Tom and the Veep, Tom tells him, "There is something in this room you need to know about, sir." Right then is when I know the room is bugged, but the Veep is either slower than I am or in denial, because Tom has to go over and show him the tiny transmitter stuck to the bottom of a decorative tray. He explains that after the Veep made Tom lie to the Mideastian ambassador, Tom decided to protect himself, whatever that means: "Now it turns out I was protecting the country as well." The Veep tries to be all quietly threatening, but he would be better off just being quiet. Tom produces a little digital recorder and plays back some two-minute-old audio of the Veep telling Lisa to lie to the Supreme Court. Tom reminds the Veep that conspiracy to commit perjury is a felony, and directs the Veep to call the Supreme Court and say he's no longer objecting to Wayne's presidency. I'm sure they'll be pissed at having been gotten out of bed for nothing, but at least it wouldn't have taken them long to get dressed. It's 9:37:02.
9:41:25. In his office, Wayne asks Karen for launch protocols and so forth. Karen hands them over, saying that Wayne can use them to cancel the strike permanently if he gets to keep his job. Because that's what he wants them for, right? Wayne also wants an update on Fayed, and Karen explains that CTU has already nabbed Gredenko and will now use him to catch Fayed. Wayne asks who's running the operation, and seems glad to hear that it's Kiefer. See? Unfit to be president. Sandra triumphantly marches in with word that the Veep has withdrawn his objections. Confused, Wayne wonders why. Sandra doesn't care, because she still gets to be the First Sister. She leaves to go practice her super-lawyering somewhere else. I'm sure she's supposed to be some high-powered attorney, but so far all we've seen her do is get one client arrested and not even have to make an argument for another. Also, her client base seems to consist entirely of her boyfriend and her brother. Wayne Caesars to Karen that he isn't going to punish anyone who voted with the Veep, and as Karen leaves, he asks her to keep giving him updates from CTU. After he's alone, he gets on his desk phone and asks to see his doctor. You think it's about a burning sensation when he urinates?
Kiefer's already at the Santa Monica Pier, scoping out the whole amusement park area from a hidden location with a night-vision telescope. Over his earpiece connection to CTU, he says that Fayed's not visible, and probably won't appear until Gredenko shows himself. In fact, the whole pier seems to be empty, although some considerate employee was thoughtful enough to leave the lights burning on all the amusement park rides for tonight's shoot. Buchanan asks Ryan how things are going with Gredenko. From the back of a CTU van, Ryan says that he's finished with the audio transmitter. You know how CTU has those invisible little plugs that can be hidden inside an ear? Poor Gredenko gets about six yards of cable and a box the size of an iPod Giga stuck inside his jacket pocket. There's also a remote tracker to be injected into Gredenko's left arm. As it goes in, Gredenko asks if it's radioactive. Ryan rogers that, adding that it goes right into the bone and has a half-life of eleven hours, so good luck trying to dig it out. Ryan clearly underestimates how badly Gredenko wants to get away, or else they'd inject the tracker into his right arm bone. Or maybe even someplace that doesn't have a bone at all. Buchanan says that Doyle's team is still twenty minutes out, and Kiefer says that they can't wait for him. He tells Ryan to send out Gredenko.
At 9:43:37, Gredenko emerges from the back of the CTU vehicle, which won't look at all suspicious if Fayed is watching, because what are the chances he'll remember that Gredenko left in a silver Range Rover instead of a black SWAT van? As Gredenko walks toward the pier, Chloe reports that they have a good signal from Gredenko's audio transmitter, and Milo adds that the tracker isotope in Gredenko's arm is working as well. Gredenko wanders alone onto the empty pier, checking his watch as he goes. He hears a random cell phone ringing, and follows the sound to where the phone is taped behind a railing. He answers it, but no one's there. Morris's first line of the week is to confirm as much. Gredenko looks at the phone's screen and sees a text message: "Building J." Kiefer reports to CTU that Gredenko's reading a message, and tells everyone to prepare to move as Gredenko heads south and out of Kiefer's line of sight. Milo says that Gredenko's still moving, and Kiefer decides to go in after him.
Gredenko finds his way to a building near the foot of the lit-up but completely abandoned Ferris wheel. I don't know how he or Fayed knew this, and before Kiefer's in sight, two of Fayed's goons appear out of nowhere and bustle Gredenko into the building. At 9:45:45, Fayed steps out of the shadows, quite dramatically for someone Gredenko just saw an hour and a half ago. Gredenko holds up a hand for silence, and unbuttons his jacket so that he can pull out the gigundous transmitter and the three miles of wire stuffed into his inside pocket. He unplugs the wire, holds the transmitter box up to Fayed, and tosses it onto a nearby table. Morris's second and last line of the week is a statement that Gredenko's audio signal is gone on all channels. Looking at Gredenko's locator beacon on the digital map, Milo says that Gredenko has stopped moving. Still walking in Gredenko's footsteps, Kiefer's Spidey-sense tells him they're up to no good, and he breaks into a jog.
Meanwhile, Fayed is pissed at Gredenko for leading the Feds to him. Gredenko says that he didn't have a choice: "But if you listen to me, we'll both get away from here alive." Fayed sends one of his minions outside to guard the door, and then oh, boy, is he listening.
Milo directs Kiefer to Building J, and Kiefer somehow gets inside without running into Fayed's guard. In moments, he's inside the meeting room, his gun drawn. But there's no shooting, because he's the only person in the room. Milo insists that the tracker is right in the room with him. Which can only mean one thing, and the axe and puddle of blood on a workbench confirm it. And yet Kiefer (and therefore we) still have to look at Gredenko's arm and hand lying on the floor. Looks like he left his watch behind and ruined a perfectly good sweater, too. Telling his earpiece about his grisly find, Kiefer tells Ryan to start moving in, and heads out of the building in pursuit. It's not too hard to find Gredenko's trail, since he's bleeding like a one-armed Russian and leaving behind a thick red spoor that says THIS WAY. Way to vanish from sight there, Dmitri.
We now see Gredenko struggling along, sweating and in pain, as he warns Fayed that CTU will be coming from the west parking lot. Meanwhile, Kiefer tells his men to circle around, and says he wants Fayed alive. What, no love for Gredenko? It's 9:48:13.
9:52:35. Kiefer's still searching for Gredenko and Fayed. Ten minutes after Buchanan says that Doyle and his team were twenty minutes away, he gives Kiefer an updated ETA: they're still twenty minutes away. Presumably they got caught in 24's first-ever traffic jam. Kiefer tells Buchanan to have Doyle's men set up a perimeter when they arrive. I would laugh yet again at CTU's reliance on perimeters, but since they're basically blocking off one end of a small area that juts directly out into the sea, I'm going to laugh even harder. Still following Gredenko's blood trail (and talk about a waste of an arm, if it was still going to be this easy to track him), Kiefer closes the distance between himself and his quarry. Seeing him approach, one of Fayed's minions opens fire with his machine gun. Kiefer and his wimpy little pistol dive for cover behind a parked SUV. He calls for Ryan, who says he's on his way. Kiefer gets tired of being shot at and takes out one of Fayed's minions. Fayed and Gredenko in turn take advantage of the distraction to flee their position. There's still one minion left behind, shooting at Kiefer. Kiefer whispers, "Show me your head." Amazingly enough, the minion obeys, and when he shows his head, Kiefer puts a bullet in it. He's now free to pursue Fayed and Gredenko as he reloads. Thanks for the backup, Ryan.
It turns out that the entire pier isn't abandoned after all -- Fayed and Gredenko find themselves in a sports bar which, under the circumstances of the day, has transformed itself into a news bar. Fayed is nervous about crossing the crowded room, but Gredenko sends him on ahead. And then, when Fayed is fully exposed, Gredenko shouts, "That's him! I recognize him from the news! The terrorist they're looking for!" Sure enough, everyone else in the bar recognizes Fayed as well. Gredenko either hasn't been on TV or he's so pale and sweaty that nobody recognizes him. Fayed, furious at Gredenko's betrayal, pulls out his gun and takes a shot at him, but instead hits a potted plant that Gredenko took cover behind. Must be a bulletproof ficus. Then Fayed starts shooting the bar patrons, but he only takes one of them down . And then he's out of bullets. As Gredenko slips out the back, the barflies converge on Fayed like he's bar shit, and then get him on the floor and start beating and kicking him. Before it can go on too long, however, Kiefer comes in with his own gun drawn, fires two shots into the ceiling, and takes over. One guy tells Kiefer that Fayed shot his friend. "I'm sorry about your friend," Kiefer yells. "We'll get him medical attention. Just stay back!" From the floor, Fayed hisses, "I hope your friend is dead!" So not helping. Kiefer tells Fayed to shut up, and amplifies his point with a boot to the face that knocks Fayed unconscious. Nobody asks why Kiefer is the only one who gets to continue the beating. He tells everyone to clear out, and over his earpiece tells Ryan to lock down the pier, and find Gredenko, and send medical attention for the two downed men he's dealing with. Presumably, with the bar effectively to himself, Kiefer's going to draw himself a few brewskis. At CTU, Buchanan congratulates Kiefer, hangs up the phone, and tells Nadia to call Wayne at 9:54:34.
Wayne is currently getting a second adrenalin shot, despite Dr. Welton's increasingly dire warnings about what a bad idea that is. The problem is that we all know Wayne never met a bad idea he didn't like, so he's all, "Let me get back to my job, or I'll find someone else who will." Instead of wishing Wayne good luck with that when he's unconscious, the doctor gives him the shot. Buchanan's call rings in as the doctor leaves. Buchanan tells Wayne that Fayed's in custody, but that they haven't yet confirmed that the bombs are anywhere nearby. Buchanan says that Kiefer's going to interrogate Fayed, although he admits that there's no way of knowing how long it'll take or whether it will work. "All right, Bill; that's what I wanted to know," Wayne says ominously, and rings off.
As he shrinks into a splitscreen window, Wayne gets back into his suit jacket, although he's in no condition for a proper presidential coat-flip. Trying it would probably kill him. Nadia, Milo, and Tom each get his or her own splitscreen window, but Lisa and the Veep have to share. And then Gredenko's in the bottom half of the screen, limping along beneath the pier. When the full screen returns with him in it, he's lurching weakly from piling to piling. Finally, he collapses into the surf. I really don't get why he turned on the one guy who could have gotten him out of there. Also, that saltwater's got to sting.
Back at the Bunker, Tom is on the phone in his office, leaning on some poor Supreme Court clerk (who, again, is already working after midnight) to seal and return the Wayne vs. Veep documents to him. As he hangs up, Karen enters and asks Tom for a truce. Tom agrees, and they shake hands. Then Karen asks Tom if he knows why the Veep backed down. Tom shakes his head and lies that he has no idea. Karen says that one of her aides saw Tom with the Veep before the announcement. Tom plays dumb, but Karen smiles that she'd like to hear the truth someday. Tom distractedly agrees as he answers his cell phone. No! Dude, never answer your cell phone at two minutes before the hour. That's just asking for trouble. And judging from Tom's reaction, this is no exception. He hangs up and rushes out, telling Karen that Wayne is about to go ahead with the nuclear strike on Mideastia. Karen's face and the musical score both go, "WTF?"
Tom runs down the hallway and into the battle bridge, where Wayne is sitting with the Joint Chiefs and looking pretty scowly. The Chairman is on the phone and looking at his watch, which can't be good. Tom rushes to Wayne's side and asks what the hell he's doing, urgently adding, "It's what you risked your life to stop!" Wayne says that he risked his life to reassert his authority. "I've got Vice President Daniels calling me weak," he whines. "Even you thought the same thing." Tom warns Wayne not to confuse recklessness with strength. Wayne says that he's done talking. And even if he wasn't, the Chairman's announcement -- "We have a successful launch" -- kind of makes further discussion moot. Tom and the camera focus in on the radar screen, which shows a red radar blip leaving the USS Vickery. Well, I guess Wayne showed us. It's 10:00:00.