Before we get started, if you're reading this, you probably remember the ads during 24, when this film was marketed as a Kiefer Sutherland film in which he tried to learn the truth about his mentor, Michael Douglas, who may or may not have been a traitor. I'm going to tell you right now that this is not that film. With that information in mind, you may proceed or bail accordingly.
The first thing we hear is some Secret Service audio, communicating the real-time movements of somebody they're referring to as "Rawhide." And then the picture comes up, and it's black-and-white archive footage of President Ronald Reagan walking out of some place on a certain day in the early '80s, which I'm not about to look up the details because after seeing this movie I don't want the Secret Service coming after my innocently Googling ass. I'll just say that the film will look very familiar to anyone who remembers 1981. Anyway, over the continuing radio chatter, we can clearly see the envelope of security personnel surrounding the Gipper. Fat lot of good it does him, because some Jodie Foster groupie manages to plug the old bastard anyway. Chaos ensues, Reagan gets bundled into the car, and the shooter is quickly hogpiled, just like we've all seen. And then the camera lingers on one faceless Secret Service agent lying on the sidewalk in a pool of his own blood, and the image dissolves into garbled death threats, both written and spoken. The agent manages to roll over on his back, and then he's in his bed instead of on the pavement, but still in his suit. Worse yet, he's being played by Michael Douglas. Already the poor guy can't catch a break. In the dark, his alarm clock flips over to 4:00 and starts beeping, and Douglas -- playing Secret Service Agent Pete Garrison, now in his PJs -- sits up in bed.
Then there's a little montage of Pete's morning routine, I guess to make us feel better about the fact that our leaders' security is routinely placed in the hands of people who have been up since four in the morning. Pete watches SportsCenter while doing crunches and the elliptical trainer in his apartment. He grins at the news that Philadelphia beat Washington last night as we see a framed photo on the wall of himself shaking hands with Bill Clinton (which probably wasn't even faked). The other photo of himself shows him sitting in an Adirondack chair on a dock, holding a drink, next to a relaxed and smiling Kiefer Sutherland. Funny how my grammar checker flags that last phrase. Showered and dressed, Pete pours himself a cup of coffee from a French press, and as he gets ready to put on his suit jacket, we get a good look at all the accoutrements attached to his belt: gun, badge, radio, et cetera. Then there's the obligatory hero shots of the Capitol Mall as the credits continue to roll. Pete walks to work, a big equipment bag over his shoulder. Work is, of course, the White House, where he greets the guy at the front gate by name and blows a jaunty kiss to the security camera. A fake crane shot speeds over Pete walking up the driveway, all the way up to the White House roof where guys in black stand guard all day with binoculars and sniper rifles. I hope they don't think they're blending in. There's more Secret Service chatter on the soundtrack, which we might as well get used to.
Inside the White House, the President is just now waking up. Slacker. He opens the door from his residential bedroom to greet the two agents standing right outside. The guards hand POTUS his locator beacon and a sealed folder containing the daily brief. One of the agents nosily peeks around to see that nobody else is in the Presidential bed. The chatter tells us that "Classic" -- the President's code name -- is up and about. The First Lady -- played here by Academy Award Winner Kim Basinger -- wanders into the room. She puts on her earrings first, in case you're interested. What I want to know is why nobody has commented on the fact that the President of the United States is Sledge Hammer. Four POTUSes I've recapped now, and this is the first one who wouldn't be afraid to shoot somebody with a bazooka.
Downstairs, a tall, bald, black agent rides the elevator to the lobby, where he runs into the arriving Pete. Pete cackles triumphantly, because apparently the guy lost a bet to him on that Washington/Philly game. As the other agent -- Charlie Merriweather, who happens to be played by the director of this film -- hands over the cash, he says he wants to talk to Pete about something after Pete's shift. Another agent named Aziz rolls up at the same time as Pete offers to talk now, but Charlie just throws a nervous glance up at the nearest security camera and puts it off for later. Hmm. I certainly hope that impending conversation will resolve things quickly.
Pete blows into the Secret Service bullpen in the bowels of the White House, bantering pleasantly with his coworkers as he heads to his cubicle. This workplace is quite a change from the last White House-set Michael Douglas movie I saw. Movie shorthand -- everybody loves Pete. Pete's partner, who I'm calling Agent Tom, even shows Pete a picture in Time magazine that includes our hero in a shot of the POTUS and FLOTUS at some event, because this movie takes place in a world where photo editors don't know how to crop pictures.
Meanwhile, the President is pedeconferencing his way through the hallways, West Wing-style. The camera stays in tight on him, until he steps through one last doorway and voila! We're in the Oval Office. The radio chatter tells us as much. Try to act impressed.
Down in the Secret Service bullpen, a supervisor-type guy named Bill Montrose (played by Martin Donovan from The Opposite of Sex) is reading out the itinerary for the day. Apparently the President is visiting a school. Uh-oh. Have the airports been alerted? In addition to the President being referred to as "Classic," we here learn that the First Lady's Secret Service code name is "Cincinnati." WKRP fan? We'll never know. We also learn that her schedule for the afternoon is "TBD." "What's B stand for?" some crusty old agent mock-asks. "Brass ones," Montrose replies, "which you don't have." Ooh, good one. I hope these guys are faster with their weapons than they are with a quip.
And then there's a whole scene that's all about all the trouble and hassle that so many people have to go through every time the President of the United States wants to leave the damn building. It's all precisely timed and choreographed movements and chatter, with a small army of suited agents -- including Pete -- hanging out by the motorcades outside. President Hammer gets into one of the cars with his National Security Advisor -- the distressingly aged Blair Brown -- and Pete and his colleagues jog to follow cars and hop in. The motorcade is off, sirens and flashers going full blast. Reason number one not to live in Washington, D.C., if not also reasons two through thirty-nine.
At the school that President Hammer is visiting, guys are doing their security sweeps with mirrors and dogs and God knows what else. It makes you realize how much Bush Sr. must have saved in tax money just by making Dan Quayle his Vice President.
In the back of his limo, POTUS pulls something out of his suit jacket, and something else falls out with it. "Damn locator," he mutters. Just so we know that the locator introduced twice in the first act will go off in the third. I'll wake you when that happens.
At the Secret Service command center, it's still a hive of activity. We can even see the icon representing POTUS's locator moving on an electronic map. THE PRESIDENT CARRIES A LOCATOR. WE GET IT.
In the limo, POTUS thanks his wife for joining him, and she says she'll go "to the beach house" this afternoon. That seems fine with POTUS. Not sensing a lot of warmth between these two. We get a few quick cuts of all of the guns and bullets in the motorcade surrounding the President, all of which are currently on their way to a school. Then there's another impressionistic death-threat montage, and we're out of the scene.
And into a new one, where Eva Longoria -- wearing a tight pantsuit over a low-cut top -- presents herself at some front desk somewhere. A tall Handsome Black Agent standing nearby offers to help, and she says she's looking for Agent Breckenridge's office. He cuts his eyes helpfully in the appropriate direction, and then directs them inappropriately at her departing ass, as he follows her down the hall.
Where she taps on the door, Agent David Breckenridge is standing at his office window with his back to her. When he turns around we see that it's Kiefer, in a shirt and tie. "You're late," he grumps at her. Eva -- who's playing Agent Jill Marin -- scoffs that it's one minute past. "Yeah, and that makes you late," Kiefer insists. Jill realizes that there is no fun of any kind to be had in this room, and decides to cut her losses and apologize. Kiefer recites a bulleted version of Jill's résumé (which starts with "Hispanic woman," naturally, and includes the fact that she knows four languages), and mocks, "Well, aren't you the recruiting poster." Basically, he's unimpressed: "Résumés don't mean a lot to me, and they mean absolutely nothing on the street," he sneers. Hey, she's not the one who brought it up. She asks if he has any other supportive comments. Yes: "If you want a career here in PID, you might want to invest in some more appropriate clothing." What I want to know is what PID stands for. But it's exposition time, as Kiefer says that he was ordered to take her on, and asks her why she requested him as her TA. Great, another acronym. "My field instructor at the Academy said you're the best investigator we have," Jill says. Her field instructor being? Pete Garrison, of course. Mention of the name doesn't seem to fill Kiefer with joy. Those Adirondack chairs must have been a long time ago.
Pete hops out of the car at the school, along with a cadre of other agents. They scan the cheering crowd lined up against the barricades, and Pete spots some perfectly normal-looking guy standing on some steps nearby. He speaks into his shirt cuff to call down some goons on the guy, who ask the gentleman to take his hand out of his jacket. No payoff later, either. And now that the area has been cleared of people who don't know how to stand when the President is around, the leader of the free world is given permission to get out of his car. "I think we should hold hands," he tells his wife, who unenthusiastically agrees. That's going to make getting out of the car awkward. But no, they get out on their separate sides, POTUS doing the double-hand wave to the cheering crowd. Cameras go crazy, POTUS comes around to take his wife's hand, and they glad-hand the crowd on the way in. Chatter comes over the radio that FLOTUS is heading to the beach house afterwards, a tidbit that Montrose passes along to Pete. Pete acknowledges the news a lot more calmly than one might expect, considering what we learn later.
POTUS does whatever he does at the school, which involves signing something while school kids sing a song, and FLOTUS smiles at everyone before giving a little speech of her own. It's all completely beside anything resembling a point, of course, because this is about the Secret Service, who are thoroughly present and yet completely outside these goings-on. How can they protect someone's life if they're paying attention to what they're doing or saying? The OTUSes leave the school.
FLOTUS is in the back of a car with her assistant, while Agent Tom drives and Pete rides shotgun. About here is where I figure out that Pete isn't on the Presidential detail, but on the First Lady's. I will give this movie credit for not treating me like an idiot. FLOTUS asks Pete how he thought her speech went. "I thought it was an excellent speech," Pete says. "One to ten," FLOTUS pushes, and Pete decisively responds, "Ten," without even thinking. He's quite good at his job. FLOTUS unfairly busts on him for being a bad liar, so Pete gets brutally honest. "Nine point five," he says. FLOTUS chuckles indulgently.
Meanwhile, Charlie Merriweather, the Secret Service agent who's a few bucks lighter thanks to Pete, climbs the steps to his house with a bag in each hand. A mean-looking blond guy in a black leather jacket appears on the sidewalk below, says, "Excuse me," then raises a silenced pistol. And this elite officer just stands there, holding a bag in each hand, long enough for the guy to plug Charlie twice in the chest. Considering how long it took Charlie to get home, speed is clearly not his thing. He falls awkwardly onto the stoop, over his own bags. I bet the director thought the actor did a really great job with that scene. By the time Mrs. Charlie (played by Gloria Reuben) comes out to find her dead husband outside the front door, the shooter is long gone.
Jill has been left alone in Kiefer's office, and she's using the time to "get the picture," as you might say. One whole wall of Kiefer's office is completely papered with written death threats against the President, in all manner of languages, alphabets, and iconography. Some of them even appear to be talking in her head, if the voices on the soundtrack are to be believed. Kiefer returns, and she asks if these are all from the last week. "That's about half of them," Kiefer says, sitting at his desk. Jeez, no wonder he's in such a bad mood. It gets better: he also has audio. He plays a recording on his computer of a graphic telephone threat. Kiefer says it's from someone they got yesterday, because the Secret Service is cooperating with the production, after all. He hands Jill a document and asks if she translated it. She says she didn't, and can tell that whoever did is not a native speaker because they misinterpreted some idiomatic phrase as a threat instead of an offer for a bribe. Kiefer gives that humorless chuckle of his that means, "I am not entirely displeased with you, and so I shall kill you last." Just then Paul Calderon as the Deputy Secret Service Director walks in and asks to speak to Kiefer privately.
Jill and the Handsome Black Agent are waiting out in the hall. He tries a smile on her, but she lets the air out of his tires with the old "you have some spinach in your teeth" line. Not feeling so Handsome now, are we? A moment later, the Deputy Director exits Kiefer's office. Kiefer himself blows out of there a second later, having donned his suit jacket and autopiloting the line, "Route all calls to my cell." You just know the screenwriter banged out that line and said to himself, "Wouldn't it be cool if we could get Kiefer Sutherland?" Kiefer tells Jill that her field work starts today.
Cut to the street outside Charlie's house, which is swarming with D.C. police. A pair of fifth-string Law & Order homicide detectives take note of Kiefer and Jill rolling up in their black Secret ServiceMobile. The agents get out of the car and head up Charlie's walk to his house, the detectives trailing behind. Kiefer takes off his aviator shades to scowl at the scene before him.
Meanwhile, the Secret Service is busy sweeping the First Lady's beach house in advance of her arrival. There's even a hedge maze that some poor agent probably has to walk all around, and I'm sure there were some complaints about that from the White House basement.
And at Charlie's house, Detective Old is sharing his theory about the murder with Kiefer and Jill. He thinks it was a simple robbery that turned deadly when Charlie tried to draw on the perp. That's his gut feeling, anyway. Kiefer examines a bullet hole in Charlie's door frame as he gives a little speech on gut feelings: "Once you have them, the only evidence you see is the evidence that reinforces your gut feeling. Human nature." Detective Old doesn't appreciate being lectured, but he leaves it to Detective Young to point out that Charlie's wallet is empty and there have been a series of robberies in the neighborhood. Kiefer says something about Charlie having spent the last quarter-century "honing his ability to sense danger," because he doesn't know that Charlie just stood there holding both his bags even when he saw the gun that was about to kill him. Kiefer also picks up a shell casing, pointing out that Charlie was shot twice with a .45. And he already knows that nobody in the neighborhood heard anything.
The FLOTorcade arrives at the Beach House, and Herself blows into the place, trailed by her armed entourage and offering food all around. Pete tells Agent Tom to go for dinner while Pete hangs around until shift change.
Back at Chez Charlie, Kiefer's getting his CSI on. He points out the bullet mark on the door frame, which he can tell is cedar, a soft wood that gets brittle as it ages. What it says to Kiefer is that the shooter used a silencer, which is what slowed down the bullet enough to prevent it from penetrating the wood. He doesn't think Charlie slowed down the bullet any? With, maybe, his rib cage? As for the detectives' theory that Charlie tried to shoot back, Kiefer points out that Charlie's safety is still on. Detective Young sheepishly says they assumed that Charlie didn't have time to flick it off. Kiefer passes the ball to Jill, who explains that unlike at the Police Academy, the Secret Service Academy trains agents to draw and deactivate the safety in one motion, because Secret Service agents don't draw unless they plan to shoot. Good to know. And one more reason not to stand wrong when the President is around. "Bottom line," Kiefer says, "Agent Merriweather was assassinated." Before leaving, he gets right up in the detectives' faces and growls, "If this man were one of yours, you'd have treated him with a lot more respect." Says the guy who just let a first-day rookie school a pair of homicide detectives.
At the First Lady's beach house, Pete is sweeping the upstairs, closing and locking the French balcony doors before drawing the curtains. "It always amazes me how thorough you are," FLOTUS says, entering the room. Pete says he hopes she sleeps better because of it, and she says she does. He gets the call from Agent Tom that the perimeter is clear, and that he's out of there. Which means that Pete is alone in the house with the First Lady. Which means that they're about to commence to fucking. Seriously. And clearly, this has been going on for a while between the two of them, which kind of puts the exchange at the beginning of the scene into a new light. Yes, our buddy Pete has been spending quite a bit of time in Cincinnati. I'm only sad that I'm not going to be able to use that joke again in this recap.
The sun goes down. In the beach house kitchen, the other agent has dinner with FLOTUS's assistant, and is later seen standing guard on the porch. Upstairs, Pete and FLOTUS are in a mostly re-dressed embrace when Pete's radio squawks. He quickly finishes dressing and dashes downstairs, to find the agent named Aziz. Who delivers the news the Charlie's been shot. Pete looks stricken as Aziz says the Director has put the whole Secret Service on alert. "I'm sorry," Aziz says. "I know he was your friend." The scene ends before Pete can say, "At least he didn't still owe me money."
The next day, Kiefer's investigation has moved inside Chez Charlie, where he's interviewing the dead agent's wife. He takes a while to draw out one small morsel of information, which is that Charlie heard that Pete was having an affair "with someone's wife at work. Just gossip. Probably not even true." This is clearly not news to Kiefer, who looks pained as he ends the interview. Way to play it close there, you old pro.
So it's still fresh for him when he steps out on the porch to see none other than Pete himself, pleasantly asking if Kiefer has a lead. "Screw you," is Kiefer's collegial reply. Wow, Kiefer's really mad about Pete shtupping the First Lady, isn't he? Pete throws Kiefer against the wall and gives him a little lecture on showing respect at Charlie's house. You know, like Pete is. As Jill watches her two mentors with concern and confusion, Kiefer tells Pete to stay out of his way. He adds that Charlie "was upset about something at work. You have any idea what that might be?" "No," Pete lies, and Kiefer storms off while they continue to spit limp insults at each other. Jill catches up to Pete, who greets her by her first name and tells her that while she'll learn a lot from Kiefer, she shouldn't listen to everything he says about Pete. Heading back to the car, Jill asks Kiefer what's up between the two of them, and Kiefer blows her off. Jill's second day on the job, and already Mom and Dad are fighting.
In the next scene, Pete has gone over to visit Kiefer's wife, to try and get her to convince Kiefer that they didn't have an affair. What, Pete thinks this never came up? Completely pointless scene, even when it ends with Pete saying, "You still love him, don't you?" In fact, I think that even makes it more pointless.
Pete's out on the street near the White House, a neighborhood which is of course filmed so that we're sure to understand that every tourist, homeless person, and vendor probably wants to kill the President. Must be exhausting to be a Secret Service agent. Pete runs into Tom, who mentions the name Walter Xavier. Pete says Xavier's an old snitch he used on counterfeiting cases, and Tom says that Xavier called in, and refused to talk to anyone but Pete. Not sure why this scene had to take place on the street, instead of in the building and the office where both guys work, six inches away from each other.
Later, Pete's leaning up against a column somewhere as a Publisher's Clearing House van drives by. It's hollered at by a ratty-looking guy in a baseball cap, who comes up to Pete jabbering about how his mom's always telling him to fill out the sweepstakes forms. I wish this were as irrelevant as it seems so I could skip it. This is Walter Xavier, who shakes hands with Pete and wastes little time connecting Charlie's murder with what he claims is a plot to kill the President. "It's a little more difficult than it sounds," Pete condescends. "Not if you got somebody on the inside," Xavier responds. Pete is even more skeptical at the suggestion that somebody in the Secret Service wants to help assassinate POTUS, but before Xavier will say anything else, he wants a million dollars. Xavier sketchily drops his eyes as a Park Police officer ambles past, but quickly gets back to his point: he doesn't trust himself to protective custody, what with there being a mole in the Secret Service and all; he'd much rather take the money and disappear. And to convince Pete, he hands over a manila envelope before walking away. Pete's left standing there with the folder, and then we're looking at him through a telephoto lens across the reflecting pool while somebody snaps pictures of him at their leisure from right out in the open. Nice instincts, Pete.
The contents of Xavier's envelope have really stirred things up at Secret Service headquarters, where the Director and his Deputy have discovered that the folder contains all manner of clearance codes, passwords, and encryption keys, including some from today. The Director asks where the President is right now, and is told he's at a press conference at "his house." Oh, those nutty Secret Service code names. The Director wants a list of everyone with "Q clearance." I assume that has nothing to do with this.
POTUS is indeed doing a press conference. In the back, the Deputy asks Pete how reliable Xavier really is, and Pete says he built three counterfeiting cases on Xavier's info, against mid-level members of the "Barranquilla Cartel." The director's assistant hands over a folder with the Q clearance list, which looks to be about thirty or forty names. He wants all of them to take a lie detector test, and says they need to assign a team to find the traitor. The Deputy says Kiefer's the best investigator they have. The Director asks what Pete thinks, and Pete says, "He'll follow the evidence, wherever it leads him." The scene ends before President Hammer notices the whispering in the back and asks the Secret Service officers, "Gentlemen, was there something you wanted to share with the rest of the class?"
Later, the Deputy is in Kiefer's office, giving him the assignment and saying he can pick any partner he wants. So Kiefer says he's going to keep Jill. Off the Deputy's surprised look, Kiefer explains, "She hasn't been ruined by years in the field." He doesn't add that standing next to her makes him look tall. The Deputy looks uncertain, but goes along with him. After all, his name's Paul, and it's between y'all.
Threat montage, and then we're back in the Oval Office with POTUS, FLOTUS, the National Security Advisor, the three highest-ranking Secret Service members, and Pete. Basically, everyone agrees that this seems to be a credible threat. The Director says they're cycling out White House agents, Montrose says they'll all be keeping an eye on each other. FLOTUS gets up from where she's sitting, walks around in front of her husband, and sits on the other side of him, for no other reason than that, now, she's not facing Pete any more. Subtle. Not that anyone notices or comments. POTUS tells them to do what they need to do, but he wants the threat and the investigation kept classified. Must be an election year.
Outside, on the portico, the Director asks Montrose if there's anything he can think of to help him protect the President better. "Yeah," says Montrose, pulling out a quarter. "This." What's he going to do, try to bribe would-be gunmen? Rely on pay phones to call for backup? Practice first-person shooters at the arcade? Tape it to POTUS's chest to stop bullets?
Oh, now I get it. The President is just finishing up some speech at some auditorium. In the wings, Montrose flips his quarter and says to the agent at his elbow, "Heads it's Sixth Street, tails it's Eighth." A splitscreen shows two separate motorcades standing ready to schlep POTUS back to the White House. The coin selects Bravo route, and the President and his entourage cut through the kitchen while an agent makes sure all the chefs have their knives put down. One assumes these little scenes would be even more awkward if the President were deathly allergic to nuts.
Kiefer's getting set up for his investigation, as he asks the Deputy Director where Xavier came from in the first place. The Deputy tells him that Xavier's an old snitch of Pete's. With that, Kiefer's off like a prom dress.
Speaking of Pete, he's now at his desk. He finds a manila envelope in his inbox, and slits it open. What he finds inside is a series of pictures of himself macking on the First Lady the night before, shot through a gap in the beach house curtains before he remembered to close them. Oops. "Mayflower Hotel, Friday 10 AM," reads the attached Post-It. Pete stashes the photos and looks around with a hunted expression, wondering which of his coworkers knows he's been in Cincinnati. Just then the elevator dings, heralding the arrival of Kiefer. He comes up to the obviously distressed Pete and asks, "What's wrong?" Pete crumples up the sheet on his desk as he lies, "Nothing." Kiefer wants to find Xavier, but Pete distractedly says Xavier's paranoid about being followed. "He wants a million bucks from us, Dave. I'm sure he'll contact us," Pete manages. Kiefer heads out, leaving instructions for Pete to contact him when he hears from Xavier. Hey, you know what Kiefer needs? A phone.
Meanwhile, the Director is in Montrose's office, asking how many of his people have had lie detector tests. "A little over half," Montrose admits. The Director charges right out of the room, announcing to everyone outside, "I want everyone in this room to have had a polygraph by 5 PM this afternoon, or don't show up for work tomorrow!" And he's out of there. What Pete should do is go in and take it right now, while his readings are still off the charts. Itâll totally screw up the baseline.
Lie detector montage, wherein all of Pete's agent colleagues are asked a series of baseline questions, like "Were you born in Morocco?" and "Have you been in contact with child pornography?" Aziz has to answer yes to that, having been involved in an "investigation." Sure, that's what Pete Townshend said. Meanwhile, Pete's pacing near the elevator, right next to the stern-faced portrait of President Hammer. I know you've been in Cincinnati, POTUS's eyes seem to accuse.
Pete goes to the Residence and shows the photos to the First Lady. He got in to see her that easily? I guess being on her security detail carries certain privileges. Besides the one from earlier, I mean. "Night-vision camera from a boat, stabilized by a gyroscope," he says. "Pretty sophisticated." FLOTUS doesn't seem too relieved to hear that at least they weren't busted by some amateur. He figures that it was someone inside the Service. "A hundred and forty-one years, there's never been a traitor in the Secret Service," Pete taglines. He's sure their voyeur and the traitor wanting to kill POTUS are one and the same. FLOTUS wonders if maybe they're not taking things too literally, and that the exposure of the affair would be death sentence enough for the President. "That's not gonna happen," Pete vows. We're supposed to think that Pete is just trying to protect the First Lady, but he's got to know that if they're looking for somebody in the Secret Service who wants the President dead, they're not going to keep looking after they've found the guy who's fucking the President's wife.
More polygraph montage, and the questions are getting a bit more pointed. Like, "Have you ever violated Secret Service protocol in the last thirty days?" and "Are you involved in a plot to kill the President of the United States?" Everyone answers no. Boy, Pete sure works with a lot of tight-asses, doesn't he?
Overnight, Pete lies awake in his bed, his hand over his old wound. Who can sleep when he knows his alarm is going off at 4:00 AM anyway?
Then he's at his desk the next day, despite the Director's departing order. He pops a few No-Doz, and Montrose bums a couple as he walks by. They commiserate over not having slept the night before, and Montrose asks if Pete's taken his polygraph yet. Apparently he's taking the Director's instructions literally. So Pete's off to do it now.
We see Pete all wired up, answering baseline questions about his name and his 1998 divorce, truthfully as far as we know. And then the question about violating Secret Service protocol comes up, and the camera zooms in close to his face as he lies, "No." Come on, is there specific protocol on the books about having sex with the First Lady? Maybe he could claim to have been checking in there for weapons. He answers "Not that I know of" to the question about endangering the President's life in the past six months, and is told to answer yes or no. He goes with no. The scene ends without any alarm bells going off, bars dropping over the door, or current pouring into Pete's chest through the electrodes.
Later, Pete paces outside the Mayflower Hotel, tieless. I assume it's Friday at 10 AM. The bellhop tells Pete he has a phone call. The voice on the other end gives Pete directions to the nearby Las Palmas coffee shop, and he heads in that direction. He sits in the coffee shop for what looks like quite a while, until he gets tired of waiting and walks out. And he's picked up a tail, a Latino dude with long hair and a goatee. Goatee Guy exchanges confused glances with another guy as they realize Pete's shaken them. Pete watches Goatee Guy speak into a cell phone, but stays out of sight. So now the follower has become the followee. There's some cat-and-mousing in a train station, and then Pete's in a parking garage. So you know things are about to go south. A car screams toward him down the aisle, and he dashes for cover between parked cars and draws his weapon. The car stops short in front of him, as does another arriving from the other direction. And suddenly the whole ramp is swarming with FBI guys. You can tell by the windbreakers that they're all wearing with the letters "FBI" on the back, and by the fact that they're all pointing their guns at Pete. He whips out his badge and waves it around before putting his own gun down on the pavement. The FBI guy in charge examines Pete's ID and demands, "What the hell were you doing at Las Palmas?" Pete says he was "having a goddamn cup of coffee," and asks what's going on. "Is that one of your agents I'm following?" Pete asks, referring to Goatee Guy. "Sorry for the crossover," says the Fed, handing Pete his badge back. Well, I'm sure there will be no repercussions from that. Maybe Pete will be lucky and these aren't actually FBI guys, but elaborate pranksters who like to send unsuspecting blackmail victims to a coffee shop, stand them up for hours while the mark fills up on coffee, and then try to scare them into pissing themselves.
Pete's back in the White House, where he's quickly accosted by an also-tieless Agent Tom, who's wondering where the hell he's been. Pete says they're not due to leave for Camp David until the next day, but Tom says there's been a change of plans and POTUS wants to leave today. As they come around the corner, Pete nearly collides with the First Lady, who's arriving with her assistant. Through quick thinking, razor-sharp instincts, and years of experience, he manages to prevent his dick from falling into her vagina. The President, standing outside the Oval Office in a casual tan jacket and no tie, greets the arriving parties and welcomes them into the Oval Office to plan their departure.
Out on the lawn, the two agents and the OTUSes board the Marine One helicopter for the flight to Camp David. Hey, where's the President's detail? Isn't it kind of unchivalrous to snake your wife's Secret Service agents out from under her? Anyway, during the ride, POTUS asks for a private convo with Pete. "We're really, both of us, in uncharted territory here, aren't we?" POTUS opens. Pete can barely force himself to nod, but POTUS is only talking about the assassin in his detail. Pete steals a look over at FLOTUS. What POTUS actually wants is to get some stuff from Pete's informant firsthand while they're at Camp David. Pete agrees. POTUS looks over his shoulder at his wife, probably wondering if she's looking at Pete as much as Pete is looking at her. I can't believe Pete thought that POTUS knew and was planning to confront him. If that were the case, there would be a lot more agents on board, and Pete would end up scattered over several acres of Maryland forest.
The chopper lands at Camp David, where POTUS is met by the NSA. She bundles him onto a golf cart to meet with the negotiating parties, and suggests the First Lady join the wives for tea. Tom follows the President's cart in a cart of his own, while Pete walks with the First Lady. She is totally freaking out, and Pete tells her to keep cool. Which she does, once she meets up with her assistant to talk about tea. So now that Kim Basinger has an Oscar, she's decided to try playing a character who deserves one too?
Later, if not the next day, the agents are hanging out in one of the retreat's cabin when Pete gets word that Xavier is calling. We cut right to the call, which is being overheard by just about every Secret Service officer we've seen so far, including Kiefer and Jill, remotely from inside the White House. Xavier tells Pete to meet him at a mall food court at 11 AM. Xavier makes the typical noises about Pete coming alone, and hangs up. "You heard him, let's go," Kiefer says to Jill. Pete tells the bosses that Xavier intentionally picked a place where he can mix with a crowd, which means they can't set up surveillance. The Director insists that another, previously unseen agent named "Chiminsky" go with Pete. Pete doesn't have time to argue.
Kiefer and Jill are also in the car and on their way, Jill flipping through photos of Xavier as they go. She manages not to say to Kiefer, "There's your boyfriend."
Pete pulls his Secret ServiceMobile into a parking spot at the mall and gets out, toting a duffel bag. About three seconds later, the other agent, Chiminsky, crawls out of the back seat and crouch-runs behind the car to follow. Not obvious at all.
Up in the mall's crowded food court, Xavier sits at a table by himself. Pete rides the escalator to the top floor and heads in that direction, peering around through his sunglasses. Chiminsky takes up a removed position on the top level and stands leaning over a railing. We see the guy who shot Charlie enter, carrying a shopping bag. Chiminsky spots Xavier and tells his shirt cuff, "At your one." Pete glances over to his one o'clock at where Xavier's sitting. He starts to make a beeline in that direction. Xavier sees him. Then Pete hears over his earpiece, "Watch your three." Pete stops in his tracks and jerks his head to the right, where Chiminsky has spotted the gunman. Good, good. Xavier won't notice that at all. He'll totally assume that Pete is there alone, and is only sensing potential threats by using the Force. Not that anyone recognizes the Blond Gunman; they guy's just acting suspicious. Pete makes a move toward Blond Gunman, but the bad guy disappears behind an "Employees Only" door. And when Pete looks back, Xavier's gone as well. As Xavier heads out of the mall, and Pete wanders around in confusion, nobody notices the Blond Gunman reaching into his shopping bag, pulling out his silenced handgun, and tossing the bag aside. It's that last thing that I think would really attract attention. More cat-and-mousing leads our two principals to the bottom floor. Chiminsky spots the gunman -- complete with gun -- almost right below him, and instead of drawing his own weapon, he hollers into his shirt cuff to Pete, "Check your nine!" The gunman hears this, turns around, and plugs Chiminsky twice in the chest. Chiminsky obligingly falls forward over the railing to his death. Whatever. He sucked anyway. Pete's weapon's out now, but the Blond Gunman's already shooting at him, too. There's a little Romancing the Stone echo as glass railing panels explode behind Pete while he scampers just in front of the line of fire. "Get down! Secret Service!" Pete bellows to the crowd. He pops up to try and return fire, but the Blond Gunman has grabbed a hostage. Pete dives back under cover. "Shots fired, agent down," he tells his shirt cuff. The transmission reaches Kiefer, who relays a request for backup. "Blond hair, dark jacket," Pete describes the shooter.
Meanwhile, at Camp David, the President is posing outside for a photo op with his fellow leaders.
At the mall, the Blond Gunman has ditched his hostage and is about to leave, until he spots the police cars rolling up outside and thinks better of it.
At Camp David, Montrose looks at the waiting motorcade. He looks at the waiting Marine One. He flips a coin, and for a moment the fate of the world hangs on the random motion of that hurtling bit of metal. It's very La Bamba. "Heads," Montrose says.
The gunman stalks the rapidly emptying mall. Nice shot of a security guard's dead body riding up an escalator. Kiefer and Jill roll up outside and run for the entrance. They've clearly picked an entry point where the panic hasn't reached yet, because there are still quite a few people walking around like nobody's shooting the place up at all. Over their earpiece radios, Pete gives them directions to where he is, and Kiefer leads the way as he and his rookie partner draw their weapons. Safeties off, I assume.
At Camp David, the door of Marine One is closed. The motorcade heads down the road. The helicopter takes off. One way or another, the OTUSes are out of there.
At the mall, the Blond Gunman takes another couple of potshots at Pete, and misses, of course, Kiefer and Jill have caught up, and the former calls out, "I don't have a visual!" I bet Kiefer totally ad-libbed that line. The three agents move to flank the bad guy, who they think is trapped in a store. We hear radio chatter saying the shooter has blond hair and a dark jacket, even as we see him walking right out past the security cameras, sporting a red baseball cap and a light tan jacket he stole off a mannequin. Murder and shoplifting. Tsk, tsk. As SWAT teams arrive outside, Kiefer spots the dark jacket the shooter left on the floor, and dashes for the most likely exit. Pete doesn't even bother following. He just takes off his sunglasses (finally) and looks around unhappily.
Marine One is passing over wooded countryside, when a ground-launched missile hits it and blows it right the fuck out of the sky. Funny how I keep finding myself recapping instances of Presidential modes of air travel getting shot down, isn't it? Hi, Secret Service! You guys do great work!
Things are being cleaned up at the mall. Pete asks if Jill is okay, and she nods shakily. Kiefer asks Pete why his informant wants him killed. "I've been wondering the same thing," Pete says. "Might want to figure that one out, Pete," Kiefer lectures, and he and his partner are out of there. Hey, who's the investigator here, anyway? The Director has arrived at the mall, and he tells Pete, "The Presidential helicopter just went down." I guess he figures Kiefer doesn't need to know that until he gets back to the office.
The wreckage of Marine One burns merrily in the woods, while the Secret Service video wall is dedicated to news reports about the crash. According to the media, it's still unknown whether the OTUSes were on board at the time. That's it, crank up the suspense.
But by the time the Blond Gunman from the mall lets himself into a ratty apartment somewhere, the TV is reporting that the OTUSes are safe. Whew, I was worried. His compatriots are watching the report on TV. One of them, a nerd with glasses, a goatee, and an AustralEnglish accent, unhappily remarks, "Our friend was insufficiently motivated." Okay, you know he's evil. Nobody talks like that except evil people.
Pete gets home after dark and sets all his stuff on the counter as he turns on the news his own self. He pulls up his shirt a bit, revealing what looks like some kind of padding. Which would explain why he looks so stocky in this movie, which of course has nothing to do with the fact that he's nine million years old.
Meanwhile, TerrorNerd is on his phone, giving somebody what-for about the President not being on the helicopter. "We're going to meet, and we're going to discuss this," he bitches. At the other end of the line, the hand holding a cell phone looks worried. Yes, all we can see is a hand. I should have known that the Secret Service mole was Agent Thing.
Back at Pete's house, there's a knock on the door. Pete checks the peephole, and opens the door to show us that Kiefer and Jill are waiting on the other side, along with the Handsome Black Agent and another guy. "You're being investigated for treason," Kiefer announces, handing Pete a search warrant. Looks like they're coming in.
A bit later, Pete asks why he's still on duty if he's under suspicion. Kiefer says, "The Director didn't want to arrest one of the guys responsible for saving Reagan's life without a little more evidence. How long you been working for the Barranquilla cartel?" Pete's thrown by this, so Kiefer quickly produces Goatee Guy from earlier. Kiefer introduces Goatee Guy as an FBI agent, and asks what Pete was doing at the coffee shop. Pete sticks to his story that he was having a cup of coffee. Kiefer says it was four hours' worth of coffee, that Agent Tom said he called Pete four times, and that Pete never called back and almost missed the flight to Camp David. Pete says the flight was moved up two hours, and that it was too noisy for him to hear his cell phone in the shop. He testily asks why this is such a big deal. Goatee Guy speaks up and says that the coffee shop is a dead drop for the Barranquilla Cartel. Oops. Pete looks shocked as Kiefer moves in, saying that Pete walked into a stakeout. Kiefer growls, "Now, I want to know your go-to guy at the Barranquilla cartel, and I want to know how you were going to help them kill the President." Pete, getting pissed, asks why he would want to do that. Because...you're...fucking his wife? Kiefer says he doesn't know or care; he just sees what the evidence is telling him. Pete lectures, "I have given my entire life to the Secret Service. I've gotten up at four o'clock every goddamn morning --" Kiefer sees an opening to a confession, and asks if Pete's pissed at not being made Director after all his years of dedication. Pete tells Kiefer not to project his own ambition on Pete, but Kiefer's on a roll: "You took a bullet for the President of the United States. And in the twenty-five years since, you haven't even made shift supervisor on a presidential detail, and that I know you wanted." Then they start yelling at each other, and Pete denies having an affair with Kiefer's wife, which Kiefer denies has anything to do with this. Kiefer tells Pete to "get a grip," and says the evidence is overwhelming, between failing the polygraph test, hanging out at a coffee shop for drug dealers, and Pete's access to Marine One. Pete reminds Kiefer that it was hit by a missile, and Kiefer answers that that was because the helicopter's countermeasures were deactivated. Pete yells that a hundred other people had access to the helicopter, so Kiefer whips out some bank account papers with Pete's signature on them. Which Pete doesn't appear to recognize. "I'm being framed," he says, looking at the papers. He asks why he would have initiated the investigation if he's the guilty party, and Kiefer says that he did it to divert suspicion. There's more cross-yelling, with the two men right in each other's faces, until the Handsome Black Agent sticks his head in to announce that the Director has arrived. "You better start thinking about cooperating," Kiefer warns -- yet another line he can say in his sleep by now -- and heads out to meet his boss.
Pete heads into the kitchen to get a glass of water, yammering faux-innocently about the Director coming to see him. He gets a glass out of the cupboard, and when the other agent gets close enough, he makes his move. Which is to say, he assaults him with the freezer door. I'm not making that up. He also manages to flatten the Handsome Black Agent who's half his age and twice his size, taking the poor guy's gun. On his way out, he also yoinks the other agent's radio. Interesting way to prove one's innocence. "Garrison, back door," the Handsome Black Agent gasps into his shirt cuff.
Outside, Kiefer turns around and rushes back into the house. Pete heads out the back door and runs across the patio. Jill has a clear shot at him from yet another door, but she doesn't take it. She just yells, "Pete!" It's not enough, and Pete's away. "Where is he?" Kiefer demands from behind her.
Pete cuts through a neighbor's house as Kiefer tells his radio to cordon off the area. Oh, Kiefer, you disappoint me. Have you learned nothing about "perimeters" in all these years?
Outside, the other agents confess to Kiefer that Pete got away with a gun and a radio. Handsome Black Agent looks at Jill, and Kiefer snaps at him, "What the hell are you looking at? She's been here two days. How long have you been here?" Ouch. Except it's at least four by my count. That's long enough to at least try to shoot Pete in the leg.
Pete reaches a busy street and hails a cab. "Just get me out of here," he tells the not-at-all-suspicious driver. And with that, Pete's officially on the lam. Only took an hour to get to this point, too.
Outside Pete's house, Kiefer's giving a big speech to the assembled officers on the street. "To most of you, he's a friend. To some, a legend." But they have to catch him anyway, because according to Kiefer, he's guilty as hell. More bad news: "He is smarter and more experienced than all of you," Kiefer pep-talks, as we see Pete doing a little shopping at a corner hardware store (microcassette recorder, canned compressed air, Krazy Glue, electronic connectors. You know, the basics). Kiefer: "He knows how you think, he knows what you know, he knows how you operate, and he will use that against you." I hope Kiefer's having a good time actually giving this speech for once, instead of being the guy this speech is usually about. Kiefer adds that Pete also knows it's going to be tough for any of his colleagues to shoot him. Jill looks abashed at the demonstration she recently gave of this very concept. So Kiefer advises everyone to visualize Pete in their sights and pulling the trigger. Meanwhile, Pete pays for his stuff with cash (quite a wad he's got on him, which is lucky) as we hear Kiefer say that this is probably going to end with Pete good and shot. Is he ever in a good mood? Pete also takes a complimentary hardware store magnet, and while the cashier is on the phone, he swipes the guy's jacket as well.
It seems to fit him pretty well, as he skulks in a dark alley behind a fancy restaurant. He listens in on some chatter with his stolen Secret Service radio, thereby confirming that the First Lady is inside having dinner. Okay, I can buy that Pete knew where FLOTUS was planning to eat tonight. I can't buy that the Secret Service let her eat there anyway once Pete was accused and on the loose. But here we are. He breaks into the restaurant's back entrance, jamming that free magnet up against the top door stop to make sure he has a clear exit route when the time comes. He reaches a position in a back hallway where, if he takes another step, he'll be spotted through the doorway by a Secret Service guard who's annoying the kitchen staff with bad jokes. So Pete uses his PDA to look up and dial the number of a phone behind the agent. As the agent turns around for only a second, Pete darts past the open doorway, unseen. He makes it as far as the back hallway that leads to the restrooms and the wine cellar. It's the wine cellar where he takes refuge, unseen by another agent posted nearby. Meanwhile, in a spectacularly fortuitous bit of timing, FLOTUS is getting up to use the restroom, and Agent Tom notifies the other agent that she's on her way. The hall agent checks the ladies' and is about to check the wine cellar where Pete's hiding, but she finds the door locked. She decides it's clear anyway, which she will soon regret. When FLOTUS approaches the restroom door, Pete sticks his head out into the hallway, where FLOTUS can see him but the agent can't. FLOTUS dashes over to meet him, and all the agent sees is the ladies' room door swinging shut. I'm not sure the Secret Service was too happy with this scene, but maybe they were mollified by the argument that the only people in the world who can put one over on Secret Service agents are other Secret Service agents.
In the wine cellar, the two Oscar winners have an urgent, whispered conversation. She asks what he's doing there, and he says he was framed. Terrified for him, she tells him to turn himself in and she'll tell her husband the truth, but he refuses. Because he's protecting her, remember. She's afraid he's going to get killed if he remains a fugitive, but he knows how she can watch his back: find out the agents' daily password. Don't worry, it won't make any more sense later on. He kisses her goodbye and sends her back into the hallway with a full bladder and no excuse to return to the bathroom any time soon. I do have to give Michael Douglas credit; he does do a fairly good job in this movie of acting like he's in love with a woman whose age is within fifty years of his.
Back at the command post that Kiefer and the agents have set up at Pete's place, they get word that Pete just used his cell phone to call the First Lady's restaurant. Kiefer immediately teleports to the kitchen there, where he takes in the entire scene in about a moment. Noticing the phone behind the agent Pete snuck past earlier, he accuses, "You turned around when it rang, didn't you?" The agent sheepishly admits as much. Kiefer huffs, "Ballsy." Jill pops in to say that Agent Tom heard from FLOTUS what happened. As she and Kiefer head back to the restroom area, Kiefer explains that FLOTUS doesn't want to believe that her protector is trying to assassinate her husband, and that Pete is looking for allies. Kiefer finds the wine cellar, now empty. "The idea," he bitches at the hallway agent, "is to secure the entire site." Having made everyone feel bad, Kiefer leads Jill to the exit, ordering her to check stolen car reports on Accords, Tauruses, Camrys, and Explorers. "How do you know what kind of car he's going to steal?" Jill asks. Kiefer explains that Pete knows those are the four most commonly registered vehicles in the D.C. area. And as we see Pete stealing himself a Taurus, Kiefer adds the Pete's next move is going to be to find his informant, Walter Xavier. So at least Kiefer will know not to look for Pete at hair salons.
Pete spends the night in the driver's seat of his stolen Taurus, parked by the side of a rural road somewhere. Pretty bold for a federal fugitive in a stolen car. He's awakened by the morning sun. That must seem almost decadent, for someone who's used to waking up at 4 AM. Pete drives along the dirt roads until he comes across a crummy little mom-and-pop market, a bait shop with a sign advertising internet access. Inside, he uses the terminal to dummy up some Publisher's Clearing House business cards. Is this part of a plan to buy his way out of trouble with a giant check?
Meanwhile, in Kiefer's office, Jill says they can catch Pete if he logs in to the Secret Service network remotely, even if he logs in as someone else. Kiefer doesn't think Pete would risk it, but Jill thinks he's trapped. "We have his credit cards, his cell phone. There's no other place to hide." Except the shoulder of any number of rural roads throughout Maryland, of course.
Pete drives his stolen Taurus to a run-down farm. Clipboard in hand, he climbs the stairs to the rickety front porch and pleasantly greets the elderly woman who meets him there. He uses the one thing he knows about Xavier's mom, which is that she's a member of the Publisher's Clearing House faithful, and introduces himself as a member of that organization. See, he's got business cards and everything. Mama Xavier claims she hasn't talked to her son in three years, and thus can't be any help at all. Pete's cop eyes get the better of him and he stares at her intently as she speaks, but he keeps up the charade until he leaves the porch.
Even so, Mama Xavier's onto him. She walks right inside, picks up the phone, dials, and says, "Walter? It's Mom. Guy just come by the house looking for you. He's a cop." So it seems like she's a step ahead of Pete, but he's really the one who's a step ahead, because he's pulled his car up next to the phone pole by the house, where he's jury-rigged a phone-tapping device using his PDA and mini recorder. Looks like someone's got himself Xavier's phone number. And he didn't even have to climb a ladder.
He heads back to the internet bait shop, logs into the Secret Service network under Agent Tom's ID, and punches in his ill-gotten phone number. Having gotten what he wants, he gets up and leaves under the proprietor's suspicious eye. Come now; is the Secret Service network really the only place on the internet where you can access a reverse phone directory?
Back at HQ, Jill is trying to tell Kiefer that her gut tells her Pete's innocent. Kiefer spares her his lecture on gut feelings, and says instead that he and Pete were best friends for ten years -- "Until he slept with my wife. So trust me when I tell you, the only thing Pete Garrison cares about is Pete Garrison." Oh, and also vagina, apparently. Right then, the Handsome Black Agent walks up with the news that someone logged in under Agent Tom's ID from an address in a fictional Maryland town. Kiefer's incredulous, but he's ready to go. Pete was right -- he will follow the evidence wherever it leads, even to places that don't exist.
Pete carefully scopes out a filthy little collection of outbuildings somewhere near the coast. He drives up and hops out of the car, gun drawn and calling Xavier's name. But of course, upon entering the shack, he sees that someone else came to see Xavier first, and all they left was a .45 shell casing and one dead snitch. Pete's still taking this in when he hears the cars outside. He dashes back to his own vehicle and hauls ass out of there. Kiefer and Jill stop when they reach the hut, and Kiefer goes just far enough to say to Jill, "Notify Intel we've got a body." Now, that doesn't look good. A team of agents secures the hut, leaving Kiefer and Jill to lead the pursuit. And Pete's screwed, because his car quickly runs out of road. He's forced to abandon the car and run across a footbridge to a nearby island. Kiefer follows on foot, telling his men to take the car around to cut off Pete's escape. It'll be interesting to see how this race between short legs and an aging ticker will play out.
Pete stops for breath, because I'm sure Michael Douglas's agents negotiated some pretty strict guidelines dictating how long he could be made to run in one continuous shot. Pete then spots a decrepit ship anchored nearby. He makes for it, followed by Kiefer. Pete tries to lose his pursuer in the bowels of the boat, but it's a short chase; soon they're facing each other in the salvage yard. Kiefer holds Pete at gunpoint. Instead of drawing his own weapon, Pete says, "The traitor is still out there, Dave." Kiefer tells him to come in and they'll talk about it. "The only reason I'm alive," Pete says, "is because they don't know where I am." Except now they do, so that kind of falls apart if you look at it too hard. He turns to run, as Kiefer brandishes his gun and begs, "Don't make me do this." Pete makes him do it. Kiefer's bullet hits Pete in the back of the shoulder, sending him sprawling. The other agents hear the shot from some distance away. Pete staggers to his feet, looking wounded in more ways than one. "You want to shoot me?" he asks Kiefer, nearly crying. "Forget about the Kevlar. Shoot me in my face!" Kiefer can't do it, and instead watches as Pete hops over a low wall and escapes across the water to the mainland in a small motorboat. As Jill and the Handsome Black Agent arrive, Kiefer explains, "I took him down with a shot to the vest. I couldn't take a second shot." Nobody asks what he means by "couldn't." That little speech he gave outside Pete's house must be burning a hole in his head right about now.
Kiefer takes a meeting with Montrose, who tells him the least secure place the President's going to be in the next few days is at the G8 summit in Toronto. Busy guy, this President. Talks at Camp David one week, G8 the next. I guess his brush clears itself. Kiefer doesn't think Pete will have any trouble getting himself over the border. "You really think it's him, don't you?" Montrose asks. Kiefer doesn't answer.
Pete's next move is to present himself at the home of Dead Charlie, where the agent's widow is at home alone under no kind of protection at all. She lets him in, and after he tells her what's been going on, he says he thinks Charlie heard about what's being planned so he'd like to check Charlie's computer files. "Is that why there's a car watching the house?" Mrs. Charlie asks, and Pete loses all interest in any old computer files. Mrs. Charlie points out a maroon Cadillac through the back window. He asks for the keys to her car and tells her to call the police -- not the Secret Service -- and tell them about the Cadillac. What kind of law enforcement wife wouldn't have already done that? I hope her house is haunted by the ghost of Charlie, moaning in a spectral voice, "Call the cops, dumb-ass." Coincidentally, the driver of the Cadillac chooses this moment to back out of the alley and drive off. Pete manages to follow in Mrs. Charlie's car anyway.
The Cadillac pulls up at an apartment building, and one of the bad guys from earlier gets out and walks inside. Pete waits for a light to come on in one of the apartments, then heads around back to scale a fire escape.
Meanwhile, the bad guy is inside on the cell phone to his compatriots, who are out and about somewhere in another car. He's explaining that he got tired of staking out a dead Secret Service agent's house, so he came home. Meanwhile, Pete is stealthily entering the apartment through the window, gun drawn. He spots the counter where the bad guy left his gun, and goes for it. But his luck finally runs out, because the bad guy sees him. They struggle for it, and next thing you know there are bullets flying all over the place. The bad guy gets away and pulls a backup weapon out from under a couch cushion, which he tries to shoot Pete with. But Pete gets him instead.
Of course, this is all being picked up by the phone, with TerrorNerd still listening closely on the other end. Pete roars at his victim, "Your name! Who sent you?" But the guy's too busy dying to answer any questions. Pete finds the cell phone in the hallway, still on and connected. He picks it up, and he and TerrorNerd listen to each other breathe for a second until TerrorNerd hangs up and orders the man behind the wheel -- the Blond Gunman, of course -- to turn around.
Pete of course knows that now he doesn't have much time before the bad guys return, so he starts ransacking the place looking for evidence. He comes up empty, until he spots the loose insulator stripping on the refrigerator door. Sure enough, behind the door shelves he finds a huge stash of cash, guns, and passports. Dude, where did these guys buy their refrigerator? There's also a Rand-McNally map of Toronto, which you'll recall is where the President is going to be tomorrow. Pete grabs a plastic cup from the kitchen, wipes it down, and carefully clamps the dead man's fingers around it to collect his prints.
His next move is to use the dead terrorist's phone to make a call waking up Jill at home to tell her the address of the shoot-out he was just in. The apartment number would help too, probably, but I suppose he doesn't want to gift-wrap it for her. Otherwise how is she supposed to learn? He tells her what he's found as he bags the fingerprinted cup. Jill says they're on it, "but I really think you should come in." "Yeah," Pete says, and hangs up, leaving the conspirator's phone on the counter as he leaves the apartment. I guess he figures it will be of more use to the investigation than it will be to him. Funny, because the Kiefer I know prefers to ignore captured cell phones when there's a live suspect to torture.
Through the magic of filmmaking, we're instantly transported forward in time, when Kiefer is the only person in the apartment. He's gotten Pete on the phone somehow, and is telling him that there's no body in the apartment, and no other evidence besides lots of blood. Looks like the bad guys beat Kiefer there and cleaned up. Kiefer says he doesn't have enough to take back to the Director, so all Pete can do is insist that the President is going to be hit at the G8 in Toronto. He hangs up, having proven his innocence by having foreknowledge of the place and time where the President of the United States is going to be assassinated. Oh, wait.
In the White House residence, POTUS tells his wife that he's heading to Toronto tonight for security purposes. While he's talking, her cell phone rings. She checks the caller ID, sees it's Pete, and lies to her husband that it's a California number and she'll call her sister back. Or the Secret Service code name for the President's sister-in-law is California. You suppose Pete's spent any time there? POTUS asks her to look over his speech for the next day, and leaves the room. She takes the opportunity to check her voice mail. There's one message. Pete says, "Sarah, I want you to know, if I don't make it, I was doing my job. I gotta turn this off before they track me." So I guess she can't call back.
Kiefer's barking orders to the men outside the conspirators' apartment when his cell phone rings. "Agent Breckenridge? Sarah Ballentine," says the First Lady in his ear.
Next morning, Agent Tom lets Kiefer into the Residence, where the First Lady is waiting. There's some awkward business when she offers him a drink, but she figures out almost as quickly as most people do that this guy is no damn fun, and gets to the point: "Pete Garrison and I are having an affair," she says. Kiefer sort of sucks his lips in as she offers him a seat and gives him the envelope containing the sex photos that got Pete into this trouble in the first place. FLOTUS says she knows why Pete failed the polygraph test, and why he was in the coffee shop. Kiefer's expression is blank. If he's decided that this provides Pete with a motive rather than exonerates him, it's too early to tell.
Meanwhile, Pete walks into a men's store somewhere, and instantly walks back out carrying a garment bag over his shoulder. He finds a men's room to wash up in, and comes out looking quite sharp indeed in a new dark suit. Keep the receipt, Pete, in case they let you expense that after this is all over.
Toronto! I can tell by the CN Tower on the skyline, even without a subtitle. Pete enters a police station, identifies himself as U.S. Secret Service, and says he has a "priority item" for the crime lab. The desk officer directs him to the eighth floor without even looking into the brown paper lunch bag that Pete's placed on the counter, but he does ask him to sign the log. Pete manages to do so without looking up at the security camera behind the counter. You can tell he wants to, though.
Up in the fingerprint lab, Pete hands over the cup he stole from the conspirators' apartment and asks the lab tech to pull prints from it. The tech sticks it under the fume hood and says it'll be about twelve minutes. They're much faster on CSI.
The summit is taking place at Toronto City Hall, a pair of towers that look like parentheses from above. Officers are sweeping the entire area -- they're staked out on rooftops, checking the inner edges of reflecting pools with mirrors, and generally doing everything they can to make killing the President look like way more trouble than it's worth. No wonder the Secret Service cooperated with the production.
Pete's alone in the fingerprint lab when the timer goes off. He gloves up and pulls the cup out of the hood his own damn self, with its prints highlighted in magic dust. He even knows how to transfer the prints to film, which he slides into an envelope.
Pete gets on his cell phone and calls Jill -- who's also in Toronto and is busy blowing off a date request from another agent -- and asks if they found any fingerprints at the bad guys' apartment. "Well, I did," he says. He asks her how long it'll take for her to check fingerprints after he emails them to her. "Five minutes after I receive them," she answers, sitting down to a computer. Hey, who's the trainee here, anyway? He says he'll call her back, then enters another room full of lab techs, asking the room in general who can run a print for him. A guy who doesn't have anything else to do takes the film from Pete and puts it on a scanner, and the whorls and ridges are on their way.
Pete's still hanging out in the lab, waiting to hear back, when a familiar (to me, at least) voice behind him says, "You know, in my experience, a guilty man doesn't break into a police station and check fingerprints for a few hours. What do you think?" Pete turns to Kiefer and carps, "My phone was only on for five minutes." "I was in the neighborhood," Kiefer says. Pete starts to say he can explain everything but the bank account, and Kiefer says he knows about the affair with the First Lady. "I know you're being framed. She showed me the blackmail photos." Pete sighs with relief, and asks what's next. "We need to find this guy," Kiefer responds, and they head out together. So I guess Kiefer's decided Pete's in the clear now, except for the whole First-Lady-fucking thing. "You really are an idiot," Kiefer says. "You honestly thought this wouldn't be uncovered?" Pete says he loves her. "Well, that's practical," Kiefer snarks.
Jill calls Pete back and tells him that the prints belong to a guy from Kyrgyzstan, who used to work personal security for that nation's president and was also behind a recent pipeline attack in Central Asia. Those damn Centralasians again! Meanwhile, at the Toronto crime lab, Kiefer's on one of the computers, confirming that "these people have the financial and intelligence resources to pull this off." So that's settled, then. On their way out, they decide they also need to find the mole inside the Secret Service. Which is going to be tricky, considering that Pete was the only one on the list who failed the test. "Montrose had the list," Pete remembers. Uh-oh.
Speaking of Montrose, he's currently having a discreet meeting with TerrorNerd. He makes excuses, talking about tight security and random procedures. The bad guy isn't buying: "If you'd wanted him on that helicopter at Camp David, you could have put him there." He says he's tired of Montrose playing them, and reminds him that he made a deal. "Yeah," Montrose says. "Twenty years ago, with the KGB, which doesn't even exist anymore." He turns with a smile, and says he's done. "I don't care. Expose me. I don't care if I spend the rest of my life in prison for treason. I don't care if you kill me." The bad guy talks to Montrose like he's an idiot, which he is. "If you don't do this," he says, "we're not going to kill you." Bottom line: Montrose gets to pick between the President and his family. "The KGB's gone, but we're still here." Whoever the hell "we" is. What the hell did Montrose get from the KGB, anyway? The bad guy instructs, "When he finishes his speech, you take the primary route to the B motorcade under the plaza. And you take the radios out." He leaves Montrose alone with his thoughts, and the photos of his family taken by hit men. The answer to the question, "Daddy, what did you bring us?" could be a little awkward after this trip.
Kiefer is leaving the police station with Pete, and he's on the phone with Jill asking her to confirm with the polygraph techs that Montrose took the test.
Then we're at the G8, and the President's motorcade arrives at the underground parking garage. "Everybody ready?" POTUS asks Montrose obliviously. "Yes, sir," Montrose says, so sketchily that every polygraph all the way back at D.C. headquarters goes completely apeshit.
Kiefer and Pete are in the car on their way to the summit when Jill calls with the news that Montrose never took the polygraph test at all. It's getting dark out, so it's a good thing the bad guys didn't decide to take out the President this morning. Meanwhile, POTUS has taken the podium at the G8 and has begun his generic speech. Jill says she's also gone the extra mile by hacking into Charlie's email. She learned that he had been streaming Montrose's offshore phone logs. Montrose used office phones? Idiot. Pete tells Jill to tell the First Lady, and only the First Lady, that it's Montrose. Because it'll be more dramatic that way later. Jill acknowledges and hangs up. "Jesus Christ, Pete, the First Lady? What the hell were you thinking?" In the shotgun seat, Pete checks his weapon and says, "I never saw it coming."
Outside the summit, unruly protesters are clashing with the perimeter guards. Pete and Kiefer manage to get through with Kiefer's credentials, and they run across the empty plaza. Pete's in sniper range now, and a rooftop sharpshooter identifies the fugitive and asks if he should take the shot. Armed agents run out to meet Kiefer and Pete, weapons drawn threateningly. Kiefer shows his ID and says he's the investigator who issued the warrant for Pete in the first place. This is all, of course, being transmitted to the earpieces of every agent who knows Pete, everywhere in the building. Kiefer's urgently trying to get Pete past the guards, who say Pete's a "do not admit." Kiefer says he's countermanding that order, and they FUJIGMO him, saying Montrose is in charge. Kiefer screams at them not to call Montrose, and Pete adds that Montrose is the mole. "What's the procedure for that?" one of the agents asks the other. That may have been slipped in there after the Secret Service was shown what they were told was the final cut.
In the speech room, Jill manages to get past Agent Tom and whisper in the ear of the First Lady. Montrose watches nervously from the wings. Outside, the agents report that their radios have suddenly gone dead, even though Montrose hasn't moved. "It's going down!" Pete yells.
Jill tells the First Lady that Montrose is the mole. Her only reaction is to cast a glance in Montrose's direction. Nobody moves for a moment. Then the elevator door dings, and Kiefer and Pete are in the room with the two agents they've dragged along. The agents outside the elevator draw on them, and in the ensuing argument and pandemonium, Montrose makes his move: he dashes out to the podium, grabs the President, and drags him into the wings. Which is what he would do anyway, so POTUS isn't suspicious of him yet. Kiefer and Pete yell at everyone not to let Montrose move the President, and FLOTUS steps in, hollering at the agents blocking Kiefer, "Crystal! Crystal is the password!" For some reason, this settles the issue, and all the agents are off in pursuit of Montrose and POTUS. FLOTUS is with them, until Agent Tom pulls her off in a different direction, to motorcade C. How many damn motorcades do these people have?
Montrose and a group of other agents -- including our old buddy Aziz -- lead the President through the underground corridor, POTUS carping, "That's a hell of a way to leave the G8." Another agent bitches about the radios being on the fritz, but before anyone can respond, a bad guy in a Canadian Army uniform pops out in front of them and opens up with an assault rifle. I assume the Canadian Army didn't cooperate with the production. Agents go down, and the rest dive for cover, Montrose pulling the President behind a door frame. Elsewhere in the building, the other parties hear the shots and decide to head in that direction. Meanwhile, the blond gunman's got the President's group pinned down. The other agents ask Montrose for orders. He struggles with his conscience, and probably the logistics of going ahead with this. Montrose finally instructs, "Hold the corridor. Push him back." He leads the President into a nearby stairwell. The cavalry then arrives in the form of Pete, who manages to flank the shooter and take him down from behind. But there are still a number of machine guns to get past. "Pete, we're cut off from the B motorcade," Aziz calls out. More shooting.
Weapon drawn, Montrose gets the President to an isolated spot in a stairwell and takes a deep breath. He tells POTUS to turn off his locator. "That's how they know where we are. They're tracking us." He's squinting as he says it, like he can't believe what he's hearing himself say. POTUS asks how Montrose knows that, and Montrose just looks at him guiltily. "Oh, no, Bill," POTUS says in disgust. Hey, at least he confessed. Montrose steps out from behind cover, and gets his ass shot down from a bad guy at the top of the next flight of stairs. Way to decide to ultimately protect the President after all, by getting killed and leaving him unprotected, Bill. Fortunately, Pete and another agent arrive before the bad guy can come down the stairs and finish the job. Using a sneaky move where he crosses the bottom of the stairs out of sight of the shooter who's too far back on the landing to see, Pete takes the bad guy down. His gun is still smoking when he hears Montrose on the floor, gasping Pete's name. "My family," Montrose begs, grasping at Pete's ankle. Pete kicks away the dying man's hand. So sad for you, little Montroselets. Pete tells the President that he and the other agent are going to get him up top to the car, so it's a little disappointing that they don't get much further before Pete's fellow agent is shot down and Pete takes a bullet in the side. Kiefer and Jill find them thus pinned down, and make their own sneaky move. This time it's Jill who scores the kill shot. The little party starts limping up the stairs, Kiefer dragging the wounded agent.
Outside, at ground level, Agent Tom gets the First Lady into a car. He gets a call from Pete, requesting a "hard car" for the President at the southwest stairs. Agent Tom relays the order to the driver, and the mini-motorcade is on its way. "We're gonna get you out of here," Pete promises the President. But the Blond Gunman is still lurking in the stairwell. At least until Jill and Kiefer take him down. Which they do.
Finally, Pete and POTUS emerge to the surface, illuminated by a helicopter searchlight. The Secret ServiceMobiles are quick to arrive, crashing right through the roadblock of parked Toronto police cars. There's some kind of symbolism there, but I'm not quite finding it. Policemen and agents come running, and Pete orders a ten-meter, 360-degree perimeter. The officers turn and form a circle, weapons pointed outwards. But soft, who is this figure with police credentials walking towards them with a gun in his waistband? Ah, it's TerrorNerd, whom nobody recognizes. Kiefer leads the President towards a car, and the First Lady picks this moment to get out of her vehicle. Which is of course when TerrorNerd grabs her. As Kiefer yells, "The President is away," Pete raises his gun and shoots the bad guy twice, right around his true love. He falls away, Pete takes two more shots at TerrorNerd, and the President's car is out of there. Which is good, because it means he can't see Pete and his wife going to each other in a very un-protector/protectee kind of way.
Back at the White House, Pete's in the Director's office. The boss is holding the blackmail photos of Pete and FLOTUS. The Director stands, briefly at a loss for words. "You take care of yourself," he tells Pete. So I guess we can assume that Pete's not getting a promotion.
Indeed, we next see Pete packing up his desk and saying goodbye to his colleagues. But on his way out, one of the agents tosses him a giftwrapped package. "This could be trouble," Pete tells the expectantly mischievous smiles arrayed before him. And indeed, he unwraps a package of Depends. "I'm gonna walk out of the White House carrying this?" he asks, to general hilarity. Of course, since he saved Reagan's life, he's in a unique position to know that he won't be the first. He departs as the agents applaud.
Outside the building, he's ditched the adult undergarments along the way, and is saying goodbye to a gate guard. Kiefer and Jill stroll up, and she gives him guff about trying to leave without saying goodbye. "Well, look who's no longer a rookie," Pete says, bumping fists with her. She thanks him with a proud grin. Yay, she killed a guy! Pete asks Kiefer to dinner this evening, but Kiefer says he has a date. Pete waggles his eyebrows grossly at Jill, causing Kiefer to grump, "With my wife." But it's a good-natured grumping. Pete says that's great. Jill thanks Pete and walks off as he says, "See you on campus, Jill." "I'm gonna miss it," Pete tells Kiefer, who responds, "It's gonna miss you, too. Take care." They shake hands, and Pete walks off down Pennsylvania Avenue. He takes one last look back at the White House. Where FLOTUS is standing at the window of the residence, watching him leave. Looks like his time in Cincinnati is over. The end.
Except then the Oval Office blows up. Okay, not really. Some kind of twist would have been nice, though. Jeez.