Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | 3 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT He's As Cold As Ice!
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 5 | Aired on 10.25.2004
Cut to Veronica and Weevil back at the bike. Weevil starts to tell her what his uncle said, but Veronica understood the whole conversation. I know it seems like Veronica's skillz are getting a little hard to believe here, but for one, we know she's a very good student, and two, she grew up in Southern California. Even the gringos can hold their own. Veronica asks whether Weevil knows where Mario lives, since they have to get that piñata. Weevil offers to buy Veronica a piñata. Veronica: "Will you buy me a piñata full of steroids?" Weevil looks like he'd consider it if he'd get a little action out of the deal.
Weevil and Veronica arrive as the kids are hitting the piñata. Veronica runs up and tells them to stop, but just then the piñata breaks, spilling candy all over. Veronica beats a retreat as the women on the scene start yapping to each other about her. We cut to commercial, though, before it gets good. Damn UPN's bilingual Standards and Practices Department.
Veronica pulls Luke into the girls' bathroom, and I'm tired of this joke, because I don't understand it. If she wants a really secure place to talk to people, why not try the library? Veronica informs Luke that the steroids weren't so much in the piñata, and that he'd better pay Walker-up off if he wants to retain a certain form of virginity for his wedding night. Which may have to take place in Canada. Luke thinks that Walker-up will hurt him if he goes to him with cash and no steroids, but Veronica says she'll worry about that, but that he'd better come up with eight grand, stat. She storms out of the bathroom. Luke does not follow, for the record. Veronica looks at the door to the administration office, and flashes back to Lianne hustling her out of school to go visit Veronica's Aunt Cheryl in Palm Springs. It's unclear whether they actually went, but back in the present, VMVO tells us that, three days later, Lianne was gone. VMVO goes on that she didn't pay the incident that much mind at the time, but now she thinks Lianne really was scared.
Cut to Veronica putting a bunch of cell phones in envelopes as VMVO tells us that people rarely cut all their ties, even if they try, so she's sending a bunch of untraceable, disposable cell phones to Lianne's friends and family, and hopefully Lianne will use one of them to call her. I have to point out that Veronica didn't know the last person Lianne stayed with, not that that necessarily means she shouldn't bother with this plan. VMVO: "It's my version of a message in a bottle." As long as your version doesn't have Kevin Costner, I've got no problem with it. Keith enters, and as Veronica goes out to greet him, it becomes clear that he's been out all night. Oh, my. I wonder how many times he got...guidance? Veronica barely gives him any shit about it, but tells him she needs his help, and gives him the bare bones of the Icetwin situation. Keith: "I'll be nice to your boyfriend if you [sic] be nice to my girlfriend." Veronica balks momentarily, but agrees.