Episode Report Card Gustave: B- | 0 USERS: N/A YOU GRADE IT 12:00 PM - 1:00 PM
By Gustave | Season 1 | Episode 13 | Aired on February 25, 2002
Blip blip blip. "24." Longest day of Kiefer's life.
Previouslys. ForeignAccentedTerrorBoss pulled the plug on Gaines's operation. Jalapeno didn't think anyone would die as a result of her involvement with Gaines, but they did…herself included. All Palmer wanted to do was protect BadTherapist from the silencing tactics of KreepyKarl, but his actions were in vain. The KieferKlan were reunited when Kiefer broke into the TerrorKompound. He called Alberta for back-up and spared Rick's life on the advice of his stupid stupid daughter. An armed konfrontation between the KieferKlan and the TerrorMinions separated everyone and sent them running into the woods. Kaboom!
The action begins right where we left off with the KieferKamper exploding into flames, throwing TerrorMinions back several feet. Gaines looks around. FauxYork looks around. Elsewhere, Kiefer and Rick, a.k.a. Son In Lawlessness, run into the woods. Gaines and FauxYork step over some presumably dead bodies and head towards the woods with a half a dozen TerrorMinions in tow. Why any of the TerrorMinions are still hanging around is a complete mystery to me. They don't look like they believe in some afterlife complete with willing virgins and a 24/7 open bar is awaiting them for the killing of Kiefer. I mean, as I've mentioned in previous recaps, I've held onto some crap jobs, but when stuff is blowing up around the office and my co-workers are flying through the air, it just might be a good time to get the fuck out of there. Not to mention the fact that it doesn't look like your final paycheck is going to arrive in your mailbox anytime soon, and it's not like you're going to be able to complain to the California Labor Board about it. But then, maybe that's my problem. Maybe I just don't believe in professionalism enough to risk my life for a cause, and these TerrorMinions are America's real heroes. Nevertheless, Gaines tells AsianTerrorMinion to "cut them off at the service road," and commands the other TerrorMinions to go into the woods to find the KieferKlan. Then he jams the butt of his automatic rifle into the abdomen of FauxYork -- or as we are now calling him on the forums, PiñataYork (tm kittykat). Like, way to boost employee morale, Gaines!
And now, since so many of you have emailed me to tell how much you liked my workplace stories, I think I'll tell another story about my tenure at Bad Television Documentary Company. You know, the place I mentioned in my last recap where I worked, was fired, and then they wouldn't let me go home? When I first started working at BTDC, I reported directly to a man I affectionately refer to as PsychoFlanders.