Episode Report Card Kim: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Last Dance
By Kim | Season 9 | Episode 21 | Aired on 11.24.2009
Clip package of Jeff Ross talking about the concept introduced earlier in the season: The Loser's Club, for people who were the first voted off in their seasons. Current members (that will show up on camera) are Jeff Ross, Kenny Mayne, and Penn Jillette. Jeff is there live to induct this season's new member, Ashley Hamilton, who has a great sense of humor about himself to show up for this. He takes a turn on the dance floor with Edyta, as Ross demonstrates why he was first voted off in his season when he can't even clap in time to the music. Shortly, Ashley dumps Edyta on the floor and takes a gallop around with Jeff as his partner, and then they conclude by both ripping their shirts open. I think Jeff Ross's belly rivals mine, and I'm seven months pregnant with twins. He's brave. The song ends and Ashley hops up on the judges' table for hugs. Here's the thing about that segment; it wasn't drop-dead hilarious, but it was short and amusing, and in a two-hour results show, that's the best I can hope for. I'd rather watch that than another clip package with the remaining stars in a warehouse or parking garage somewhere talking about how they're going to win.
Time to review the season. First up is a clip package covering the first three weeks. Memorable moments included Kelly's parents sobbing, Macy Gray being bizarre, guest judge Baz Luhrmann, Aaron's weirdo green tuxedo, Tom DeLay almost dropping Cheryl on her back, Chuck Liddell's arm ruffles, Tom DeLay dropping out due to injury, and Aaron crying in the confessional.
This leads into a triple dance with Kathy Ireland and Tony, Macy Gray and Jonathan, and Debi Mazar and Maks. Kathy starts and I think it's supposed to be a tango, and I'm totally basing this on her outfit, rather than any dance moves. Then Macy comes out and...oh dear. My husband asks if she ate Debi Mazar backstage. Don't miss her. And Debi puts her all into her few minutes on the floor, bless her.
Hey, remember when everyone got the flu? It hit Derek, Mark, Donny, and Lacey. Tom DeLay had to withdraw due to foot injuries. Bad times. I'm also going to pretend that I didn't just see Maks, shirtless, giving Miss Piggy a shoulder massage. That must be some sort of delusion I just had.
Tom DeLay is back to do the Texas two-step he never got to do when he dropped out. He's really bad. At one point, Cheryl does some footwork and Tom just stands there and watches her. I think he's supposed to be doing it too? And then he shakes his butt. Everything about this needs to stop happening. At the end of the dance, Tom Bergeron puts on his cowboy hat and proves the theory that people who look good on television have outsized heads, because it's just perched on top of his head. That's not a good look. But at least that's over.