Episode Report Card Wing Chun: D | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A Perfect Wedding
By Wing Chun | Season 2 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.17.1999
In the ladies' room, Abby "Speaking of the Tolling of Bells" Morgan is primping in front of the mirror, wearing the highly improbable ensemble of a tight black jacket liberally trimmed with dyed black ostrich feathers, and some kind of freaky-ass updo involving little pieces of strategically-placed black fluff. Jen "Motivation Polka" Lindley walks in and asks if they can talk. Abby says she didn't think they were speaking, and that Jen had no more use for her now that Dawson's movie has wrapped. Jen tells her to forget it and starts to go. Abby scuttles after her. Jen essentially announces that if it's Wednesday, it's time for her to be a bad girl again. This time, the reason is that she's bored, and that if everyone is going to think of her as a ho, then she might as well act like one. Uh, she's basing this on Ty's behaviour? Really, I'd think the Jen I know would be smarter than that. Jen goes on to say that, when she thought about it, she realized that the best times she's had this year, she had with Abby. Oh, really? Like fighting over Cliff? Like (sort of) fighting over Chris? Like being implicated in the Abby-orchestrated fiasco, "Sex, She Wrote"? Jen, Jen, Jen. Evidently your memory is the only thing shorter than your legs. Anyway, Abby says that's the nicest thing anyone had ever said to her.
In yet another school-adjacent location, Pacey and Andie "Screechy McWhine" McPhee are walking out, Andie in a particularly heinous ensemble of long, light blue floral-patterned skirt slit up to the knee, navy tights, and white sneakers. This is what happens when you're off your meds? Ouch! Anyway, Pacey is saying that if they both waiter at the wedding, they'll have $120. Andie says, "Did you have an abacus in your pocket, or did you just add that in your head?" Wow, what a beeotch! When is Pacey going to dust her ass already? Pacey ignores her and says he figures that with that much money they could take a road trip to New York, have a nice dinner, go to a show and then take a nice carriage ride around Central Park. Andie rightly calls him on his accounting. Pacey says if not New York, they could have a nice romantic evening in Capeside. A tedious exchange follows during which Andie claims to hate weddings, Pacey tells her that attending the wedding with him will change her mind, and that if it doesn't, she can have the entire $120, which finally convinces Andie to waiter at the wedding.
Over at the Icehouse, Joey is coughing at Mr. Pothead's too-strong horseradish-themed hors d'oeuvre as Dawson walks in. Mr. Pothead sees him and says, sotto voce, "Dawson Leery. I thought when I came back for sure that you two would be an item. What happened?" Joey tells him it's a long story. Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't it Pacey who bribed a guard so that Joey could see her dad? Okay, just asking. Dawson congratulates Mr. Pothead on successfully getting out of the joint. Mr. Pothead says, "You're looking good," and Dawson says not "you too," but "thank you" and nothing else. Mr. Pothead remarks that the kids are growing up and then excuses himself to deal with the horseradish. Mr. Pothead tells Dawson to tell his parents he said "hi." Dawson says, "You'll actually be able to tell them yourself; they're guests at the wedding on Saturday." I have to say at this point that Mr. Pothead isn't played by a very good actor, but that his constant mellow smile is how I'd imagine someone looking after just getting out of prison -- happy and relieved. ["Or stoned. -- Sars] Anyway, he leaves, and Dawson asks how long Joey's known that her dad was getting out of prison. Joey says it was a total surprise. Dawson asks how she's doing. Joey says she's okay, since Jack, "with his typically intuitive insight...was able to calm [her] down." Dawson squeaks, "Great!" Joey quickly adds, "I was looking for you, but I had to cut school early to come here to help out." Dawson says nothing, so Joey grabs a horseradish-encrusted salmon and asks him to taste it. As Dawson is doing so, the camera pans over to a table in the corner at which two women are sitting. One says, pretty loudly: "Do you know what he did to her mother? He was cheating on her! While that poor woman was dying of cancer." Dawson and Joey both turn to look at her as the gossiping woman goes on: "I don't think he should ever be allowed back into Capeside. I mean, he's a drug dealer, for goodness' sake." Her companion hisses, "Keep your voice down!" Joey and Dawson look back at each other. Dawson ruefully says, "Well, that's Capeside for you." Joey hesitates for a moment, and then starts the too-fast chatter of false cheer: "You know I've got to get back in the kitchen but thank you for helping out this weekend I really appreciate it." Dawson helplessly watches her go.