Episode Report Card Potes: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Send In The Clowns
By Potes | Season 4 | Episode 2 | Aired on 03.08.2005
As the girls travel to a nearby location, Jay tells them that there is a movie being shot, and they squeal and jump out of their golf carts. Out of an NYPD cop car steps the one and only Miss Janice Dickinson, wearing sunglasses and brandishing a billy club. "Fashion Police!" she yells, followed by a similarly dressed Nigel and Nolé. And now, so that you all can act out this little scene with your friends, I will present it in dramatic form:
Janice: Fashion Police!
Nigel: Fashion Police!
Nolé: Fashion Police!
Janice: Where are the aliens?
Nigel: [wielding a camera] I have no idea, but when I find them, I'm going to shoot them.
Nolé: Fabulous.
I wonder how many takes they had to do so Nolé could get his line right. Also, I think that I miss recapping the Cover Girl Tip of the Week. Sigh.
Jay tells the girls that they are on the set of their first photo shoot, where they will be turned into sexy aliens who have taken over Manhattan. Just when Tyra has left the city! Oh, the irony. The panel of judges will be working with the girls during the shoot. Jay introduces them as such: "The tall, sexy, and very English Nigel Barker, our photographer." Nigel looks good. "And of course, Nolé Marin, fashion stylist." Nolé gets no adjectives, because the only ones that Jay could think of would be less than flattering. "And last but not least, the super-sexy super-diva, Miss..." and of course Janice needs no introduction. She kicks her leg up, swings her weapon around with panache, and says, "Be afraid. Be very afraid." More Janice! More Janice!
The girls go into hair and makeup. Noelle says that her mouth dropped as it dawned on her that this was the first competition. Jay introduces the behind-the-scenes staff, which includes legendary hair stylist Danilo and Matheu the makeup master. No mention of Michelle the hag stylist, thank goodness. Danilo's current style looks a bit like present-day Bret Michaels combined with Elton John when he first got his hair plugs. Slap a pink t-shirt on that and it is teh sex!
Janice chats with the girls. She tells them that they are being handed this experience on a silver platter, and that they should be courteous, be on time, and have fun with it. See, Janice gives good advice when she's sober. Nolé holds Empress Minnie and tells the girls that they need to impress her and Jay. He is the roliest as well as the poliest, and also utterly useless. Additionally, he strongly resembles a warthog. There is only one thing that stops Nolé from being the worst, and that is Jay Manuel. I have a feeling that, if they showed us more of Nolé on a regular basis, it might be a bit of a contest, though. Nolé asks Brita how old she is. She tells him to guess. He guesses eighteen, and she says that she's twenty-five. Brita tells us that age is a huge issue for her, and that most girls quit the business at her age if they haven't made it. She is not going to quit, however, because modeling is her passion.