Episode Report Card Keckler: F | 0 USERS: N/A YOU GRADE IT Mehdalus
By Keckler | Season 4 | Episode 10 | Aired on 2005.01.14
Keckler: "Wait, I can't remember what happened last time."
Dr. Mathra: "No. Nothing -- 'the katra is with me now.'"
If I recapped for a thousand years -- lord, what a thought -- I will never be able to really explain why that is so funny. But it is. We laughed that silent, wheezing laughter that hurts so good for a full ten minutes and we only stopped because the lack of air in our lungs was alarming. See, after watching "Kir'Shara," the Evil Dr. Mathra went around the house chanting, singing, and humming, "The katra is with me now." He made up his own tune. It is sing-songy, and catchy, and thoroughly annoying. He draws out the words to intone: "The KAAAAH-tra is with MEEEE nooow!" in a weirdly high voice. That was to be my one moment of genuine enjoyment for the next hour. Stupid show.
After the first watching of this episode, there was a frantic scuffle, the squall of a cat getting his tail trodden upon, and a loud bang of the front door as my muse deserted me and left me to slog through this thoroughly miserable recap.
I looked for my Muse in the bottom of a can of wine. My Muse wasn't there.
I searched for my Muse in a plate of fish. My Muse couldn't be found.
I even re-read Demian's recap hoping that my Muse would storm angrily back and accuse me of cheating on it with ridiculous portrayals of what it means to be a true Muse. My Muse didn't give a crap.
My Muse didn't even have the courtesy to leave behind a show page poll, and it was only by severe and loud drunkenness that I managed to eke out the one now up. If anyone sees my Muse, tell him I've got a box of his stuff to give him. I keep tripping over his stupid, ugly mask and diaphanous robes and if he doesn't come to get them, I'm giving the lot to Goodwill.
Trip and Quantum walk down the corridor. Well, Quantum walks, Trip mostly tizzies. He's all a-flutter because the inventor of the transporter (and family friend of Quantum) is coming aboard, and his book, life, teachings, chi, metallic spine, and smell made Trip into the engineer that we see today. To my intense surprise, Quantum is a condescending ass and also manages to drag the conversation back to himself by saying that he felt the same way when he met Zephram Cochrane for the first time. Nobody cares about this. At the transporter pad Trip fidgets with his lapels and Quantum sneers, "You wanna mirror?" Hey, Quantum, you wanna ass-kicking? "You gotta mean streak in ya, you know that?" Trip says. I don't disagree. They beam in a guy in a wheelchair, and a chick. Father of the Transporter is definitely a HITG. He was even in The People Under the Stairs -- a movie that scared the living poop and pee out of me and continues to haunt me to this day. "Are you sure it isn't Arsenio with one of those full facial masks?" the Evil Dr. Mathra asks. Pretty sure, now go sing in your corner. Quantum hugs Emery and kisses his daughter Dani, who tells Quantum they have a lot of catching up to do. "Do it later," Emery orders, "I want a tour of this ship." Oh. It's a Hey It's That Demanding Old Coot. Original. Trip gets introduced and comes over all idol worshippy. Emery thanks Quantum for letting him use the ship for his transporter tests, and jokes that his upgrades might make all of Starfleet obsolete. One can hope.