Episode Report Card Keckler: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A Private Little Hunt
By Keckler | Season 1 | Episode 18 | Aired on 03.19.2002
"How was the hunt -- any luck?" Quantum asks as three of them shine their flashlights in the startled Eskas' faces. I don't know if they were trying to make this scene tense or not, but as there were only two minutes left of the show and they took this long to reach a climax, I sincerely hope they weren't. Because that would just be sad. Holtz-Damrus wants to know why they're still there, and Quantum tells him they still had some "scans" to take. "That's why I decided I'd ruin your night vision for the next three hours by shining this light directly in your eyes. I'm sorry, but at campouts, it's a sign of a green, green rookie who does that. Twenty-six merit badges, my left Cub!" Mathra sniffs, ironing his blue kerchief. Quantum asks if they're okay -- besides being blinded, of course. Holtz-Damrus assures them that they're fine, despite Trip's observation that they seem "pretty rattled." One of the Eska tells them that their scanners are on the blink. "I'm sorry to hear it. Looks like you won't be taking home any trophies this year," Quantum says. Holtz-Damrus walks right up to him and says, "Strange, but we never failed in the hunt before you arrived." Trip and Quantum exchange looks, and Quantum says, "I guess we must be bad luck."
Back at The Boulders Of Rotten Egg Fumes, Quantum tells Blue Banshee that the hunters are gone. "For now," she says. "Did you give the others the masking agent?" Quantum asks. Apparently, she did. Quantum tells her it will keep the Wraiths safe. Blue Banshee thanks him and then morphs into a giant tarantula that bites off his head. Okay, well, you know, I was thinking it would have been a hell of a lot more interesting if Quantum had taken Moral Interstate 95 straight into Mortal Perilsville and been totally wrong about the Wraiths. I mean, it could have happened that these shape-shifters really were dangerous creatures who were just luring Quantum into their trap by reading his mind and appearing as something enticing, something he trusted from childhood. That's how I would have written it. It's way too predictable this way, and we're also subjected to Blue Banshee homilizing, "Never stop seeking what seems unattainable." Gawd! Like a badly digested potato, it reminds me of Quantum's father's "Don't be afraid of the wind, Jon!" Blue Banshee and Quantum hold hands while she tells him not to forget her. Then she morphs into a slug. No, I'm serious this time. She morphs into a giant slug and slurps away. "I won't," Cpt. Cheez-Whiz whispers. And then Quantum's face goes through a series of contortions that has sparked much debate on the boards. I think he looks disgusted, but is actually attempting to look amazed at the marvels of interstellar life. Mathra thinks he's crying. Yet another comment on Bakula's acting.